


Snow Sculpture Event | One More Chance (Universe) Part 1

by jc_aka_why_me



Category: Mo Dao Zu Shi, The Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation, 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV), 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Bonding, Character Development, Characters getting what they deserve (positive), Consent, Coping, Developing Friendships, Developing Relationship, Domestic Fluff, Family Bonding, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Moving On, Post-Canon Fix-It, Versatile WangXian Hints, Versatile XiCheng, What-If
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-24
Updated: 2020-06-01
Packaged: 2021-02-26 01:02:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 233
Words: 257,444
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21934903
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jc_aka_why_me/pseuds/jc_aka_why_me
Summary: After his role being exposed & the downfall of Jin GuangYao, Nie Huaisang went into hiding. Now, after too much time has passed, he invites several characters of the main cast to a snow sculpture event.There are many things that should be a surprise - not that it escalates entirely though, should it?A XiCheng longterm fic that is only part 1 of a (possible) 3 part universe. What you're signing up for?- A few falling outs- Lots of fluff and smut- Nie Huaisang turns into the Juniors explicit books dealer- WangXian slowly coming down from cloud 9 - will they be able to deal with their marriage problems caused by their differences, or not?- Wen Ning & Song Lan, the two forgotten ones, sharing a house - now, how will that go?- Jingyi and Jiang Cheng's characters really don't match up and they make sure to annoy one another as a reminder of it.- Maybe some r rated fun between the Juniors? And what's the secret Sizhui tries to keep from his dads & uncle?- Apropos uncle: Jiang Cheng takes tiny steps into a "proper uncle" direction...- Smut, fluff, a jealous JC, drunk Jades,... & a lot moreIf you dare to go on a wild ride: See for yourself.
Relationships: Jiāng Chéng | Jiāng Wǎnyín & Jīn Líng | Jīn Rúlán & Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn, Jiāng Chéng | Jiāng Wǎnyín/Lán Huàn | Lán Xīchén, Jīn Líng | Jīn Rúlán & Lán Jǐngyí & Lán Yuàn | Lán Sīzhuī, Lán Huàn | Lán Xīchén & Jīn Líng | Jīn Rúlán, Lán Yuàn | Lán Sīzhuī & Wēn Níng | Wēn Qiónglín, Lán Zhàn | Lán Wàngjī/Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn, Niè Huáisāng/Wēn Níng | Wēn Qiónglín, Sòng Lán | Sòng Zǐchēn & Wēn Níng | Wēn Qiónglín
Comments: 181
Kudos: 217





	1. Invitation: The beginning of a mess

**Author's Note:**

> This story is set after the end of the novel. It is technically completed even though there are extras and at least one more part coming that'll be even bigger and more surprising than this one.
> 
> A few details:  
> \- I usually think of the character in the donghua/anime version visual wise  
> \- The ages are around 2 years up for each character  
> \- Feel free to comment in case you like the story or want to read more  
> \- This is my first story of that size so be kind

,,The Qinghe Nie Sect and especially I as the leader, would highly appreaciate your presence at the upcoming banquet and event, that is the first of its kind in our country-" Wei Ying only read that far, out loud as well for Lan Zhan and Wen Ning to hear. Instantly they all knew what it truly was about. It wasn't surprising, it was just.. almost too much time had passed for such a gesture and most others at their own sects, who received the letter at around the same time, were just as demotivated.

,,It sounds interesting, but I don't think I should attend", Wen Ning spoke up first.

However, all their hopes to somehow avoid really doing so got shattered as a knock came from the door of the library pavillion. It was Lan XiChen, they had a brief conversation and at the end it turned out that they had to attend. The juniors wanted to go, so someone had to keep their eyes on them - little did the juniors, Wei Ying and Wen Ning know at the time that, even though Lan XiChen would join as well, the roles of who'd have to watch whom would be rather.. strange.

At the end - motivated or not - they had departed and arrived safely, while heavy loads of snow surrounded them. Nowadays when they were going out of the Cloud Recesses, Wei Ying wore a white robe. It wasn't a Lan Sect one, but it made it all far more real, apart from Wei Ying not wanting to forever walk around like the black sheep of the family - or the Yiling Patriarch - that he was.

The banquet was everything one could want it to be, even though it wasn't on the exact same level as Jin GuangYao's and regardless of the welcoming being rather awkward. Everything from there on proceeded normally: The juniors were hyper and wide eyed, Wei Ying was having his fun with getting rid of the ladies that surrounded his husband with openly showing affection towards him.. Wen Ning was sitting rather awkwardly in silence, apart from the times when someone would talk to him, yet Jiang Cheng and Jin Ling seemed to be missing. The only one who was somewhat off, understandably, was Lan XiChen, he was friendly as always yet his smile looked heavy-hearted. After everything that had happened, it was one of the rare times that he had left the seclusion, it could be called naturally "off" behaviour.

Short before the banquet ending Nie Huaisang then explained the rules for the main event. In short they would be allowed to use anything they found outside to assist in creating a sculpture of their liking. It was only for entertainment so: Each of them would get a price, as long as they did something at least.. This point got a few to roll their eyes, thinking to themselves "Can he be any more obvious", yet none of those said it out loud. Either way, the explanation ended with: ,,You can use water - which will be provided - , however, try to refrain from hurting yourselves or others in the process of creating your sculpture." - It had to be said, but how old were they all again?

Once this torture was over the chattering about who would do what began, yet Wei Ying spend most of his time trying to explain to his Lan Sect troublemakers what was actually going on - and yes, he felt sorry for the wasted youth.. especially that of his husband & brother-in-law who were the most confused.

The group of the Lan Sect remained rather close to the area where the hot drinks were given out - That had been Wei Ying's idea, because playing in the snow for so long wasn't anything his troublemaker were used to. After a while the first had began to build their "sculptures".. It was a bit of a sad scene but, they were actually all having fun in their own ways. Wei Ying was mostly helping the others out, honestly surprised that the two Jades weren't really going against anything that was going on - However, it must've been nice for them to be a child for once. Their skills though.. were questionable. Every so often, Wen Ning & Wei Ying would disappear, yet reappear soon with hot tea of different sorts.

It became clear rather quick that, even though it wasn't necessarily meant to be a group project - poor Wei Ying could barely manage to try and start a sculpture of his own. The juniors, after trial and error, had managed to each build a miniature snowman. Naturally, as if they shared one brain, they all exclaimed in pure joy - while completely forgetting about the Lan Sect Leaders - ,,Let's build bigger ones & dress them up!" and so they did. For a second Lan Zhan looked at them, not that they noticed, but Wei Ying nudged him in the side with his elbow, letting out a "pssht" sound before winking at him.

It was not long after that the two missing ones showed up: Jiang Cheng and Jin Ling. The latter was walking a few steps behind his maternal uncle, his expression somewhat heavy-hearted already while Jiang Cheng's.. well, the air around him was as unwelcoming as always, his gaze getting fixed on his "former brother" for a moment. His brow raised as he continued looking around, the sight was between disgraceful and hilarious.


	2. The hurtful words of Jin Ling

Nie Huaisang who had at some point began to build something himself got up, walked over and tried to greet the new guests.. However, just as Lan Xichen was standing up as well, Jiang Cheng chuckled before saying in a mocking tone.

,,So, you got what you wanted. We're here, but for what? Wanna play the idiot with them that bad?"Jin Ling who was still standing a step behind Jiang Cheng flinched, his hand clutching onto the handle of his fathers sword while his expression showed something between conflict & pain. It was unbearable to watch. Especially since, everyone who was close enough to witness and overhear the spectacle.. well, everyone other than Jiang Cheng, didn't even need to think about why the boy wanted to attend. It couldn't be a coincidence that Jin Ling dragged his relative to such a gathering.

After a moment Jin Ling shook his head in clear disappointment, Wei Ying had tried to get up but was held back by his other halves tight grip to his wrist. The juniors of the Lan Sect, together with Wen Ning, had already paused what they were doing, going back and forth between staring at their elders for a command, or stepping in on their own for their "comrade".

,,Forget it. It's not like it's your problem anyway if I turn myself into the idiot or not here. Come to think of it, aren't I nothing but an idiot to you already anyway? No, wait, a bother is a better phrase. You can just leave again. I don't care. I never wanted you to be here to begin with! Compared to you anyone else, even.. Even Wei Wuxian would be the better option!" The boy who's shoulders shook visibly began to talk himself into a fit of rage.. or more, he was letting his rage out, truly this time. He hit the spots that would hurt the most, even turning things that he actually felt into the opposite. However, as Jiang Cheng turned, his expression was between rage and the louder his nephew's shouting got the more it changed into shock. The realisation came too late though-

After a moment of more than likely debating about if he should go so far or not, Jin Ling locked eyes with his uncle, the pain showing in his own but also that he was extremely serious. Either because Jiang Cheng did look effected, or because he didn't react enough; the upset one continued. ,,Even though Wei Wuxian was the main cause for my parents death! Even though the Ghost General killed my father.. They are both a hundred times better humans than you'll ever be! Wei Wuxian is better at everything than you are!" Jin Ling shouted the last two sentences at the top of his lungs, his face red from that as well as the anger he felt, his arm extending in a flash, as if he wanted to slam it against something beside or behind him; yet there was nothing.

Jiang Cheng, like all the adults around, was frozen in place. His jaw had dropped, it felt as if ice cold water had been poured over his head. There had been two moments in his life so far where he felt as if he was getting ripped out of a state of coma.. no, it was more like.. out of a selfish daze. The first time was when Wen Ning confronted him and opened up about Wei Yings secret, now was the second.

Jin Ling stood there for a few more seconds, as if he was waiting for something, yet as nothing happened.. He shook his head again and let out a noise of either disgust or disappointment, then he stormed off into the distance. The direction he walked to was the snowed under garden, so it was safe enough. Apart from that, once they had given Jiang Cheng, who was turned away from them, a glare, the juniors of the Lan Sect ran after him.

Wei Wuxian was torn in two, on one side he really ached to run after his not by blood related nephew, on the other he truly wanted to reach out and comfort, or explain the mess to his former brother.. However, just as he was moving to get up the elegant, white and tall figure of Lan Xichen went past him. He knew that neither of his natural urges would've ended well, yet he was Wei Wuxian after all - if no one would've stopped him he'd have risked getting beaten, yelled at, or worse - no matter which way he went to or from the man in purple that he had once been so close with.

Lan Xichen glanced down, the hand at which Zidian was was clenched into a tight fist, by the time he walked up to the owner of it. He stopped in his tracks, just as he reached Jiang Chengs right side, remaining somewhat behind yet beside him. The tone in which he spoke was his honest, caring and calm one that had brought him pain quite a few times because of troublemaker similiar to Jiang Cheng. ,,You should sit down. I will get you a cup of tea. Going after him now, or making a rushed decision, wouldn't end well."

,,Who said I was going to go after that brat anyway?", Jiang Cheng's voice was filled with bitterness and rage, but it clearly wasn't directed at someone else.<

The older one of them let out an inaudible breath, it was a mixture of a sigh and a suppressed chuckle. After a moment, he took a step or two and only stopped once he stood beside the clenched fist of the Yunmeng Jiang Sect's leader. Without saying a word he subtly looked down at just mentioned hand, smiling that genuine one.

It took a few seconds for Jiang Cheng to get the hint, to snap more out of it again, shaking his hand as he did in a "fuck off" or "i give up" manner. Pretty much straight after he turned away from Lan XiChen, the entire situation was a pain and embarrassing, yet the knowing stare of the older one of them paired with this expression.. he felt even more exposed and worse than anything: teased.

Once that scene had unfolded the movements of everyone around the group had either stopped, or no one paid proper attention to the tasks they were doing. Now that it was seemingly over for the time being, at least the servants and those that weren't involved with either of the sects began to continue what they were doing. They clearly didn't want to be a part of the trouble, or bring trouble to themselves.

Nie Huaisang, however, let out an awkward chuckle, even in this cold fanning his face. He clearly didn't really know what to do, nor did he know that it would get even worse within the next few minutes.

,,I will help you." Lan Zhan spoke up, he had been silent and motionless apart from holding onto his husbands, his tone unwavering. He had needed a bit of time to decide - but now that he had made up his mind he got up to help his brother who smiled at him; before they walked away. It wasn't that he wanted to leave Wei Ying alone with Jiang Cheng, but above his personal dislike towards the Jiang Sects leader was the fact that his beloved was the others family once.


	3. Drunk Twin Jades

,,You know that Jin Ling didn't mean what he said. If you go now, because he said it, it'll be the worst decision you could make."

Wei Wuxian spoke up, once the two Jades were far enough away, it was more an honest tip than scolding the other.

Jiang Cheng clenched his hand back into a fist as he heard the voice, he hadn't really moved ever since turning away from Lan Xichen. However, after a moment of debating he turned, just to see Wen Ning quickly look down at the little snow figure he was working on. He couldn't help that he glared at him, nor could he really say anything against someone staring at him in disappointment. Some more seconds passed before Jiang Cheng then walked over, sitting down on a mat that was laying there for them to use without saying a word, staring at the snow while his thumb was rubbing over Zidian.

Nie Huaisang remained on his spot, fanning himself like mad. The only thing that could make more of a mess right now was Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian: Together. And they were!However, neither of the former brothers spoke up again. Jiang Cheng was lost in thought, even visibly this time, while Wei Wuxian was playing with a stick that he was going to use for his sculpture.

,,Young master Jiang.. I'm aware that I'm the last person you would want to hear such words from.. but I think that you are too harsh on young master Rulan.." Wen Nings tone was incredibly silent and hesitant, yet it was clear that he had no bad intentions at all..

<

However, just as Jiang Cheng looked up with a death glare the flute melody of WangXian began to play. Not that the only sect leader of the three knew the real meaning and it was good that he didn't, or else the rage he felt towards himself would've definitely raised to an extent where he'd direct it at the next best person.

Wei Wuxian wasn't able to use the official techniques of the Lan Sect, however, WangXian had always been a melody that had managed to calm not only him himself but Wen Ning, or other "dark creatures". It was probably because of the emotional effect the song had on him and currently the atmosphere really needed to change: For every attendants safety.

Jiang Cheng turned his head, his expression irritated for a moment, yet he couldn't deny the effect of the melody. His erratic heartbeat slowed down, to a more healthy rhythm, his mind felt like it was clearing. Wen Ning at the same time closed his eyes, he had gotten somewhat nervous and just like Wei Wuxian & the Jiang Sects Leader, the tune had a calming effect on him as well.

It was something Wei Wuxian was trying since quite a while: to learn how to use his skills in a positive, clean way. He was training his core, getting back on a normal path, even wielding a sword was possible for him again - after the harsh training sessions with Lan Wangji.

The time flew by quicker than they realised. The one playing Chenqing was around halfway through the song, eyes closed, as suddenly.. He felt his flute getting ripped out of his hand. Wen Ning opened his eyes, looking like most of the time as if he was searching for the melody. Jiang Cheng had also turned.. Just like Wei Ying who let out a ,,Hey!" while doing so.

It was a scene that no one expected, nor would anyone believe them if they talked about it later on. Lan Wangji had ripped the flute out of his husbands hand and thrusted it into one of the bigger snowmans that the Juniors had build. There was nothing different about him visibly though, he stood like always, looked like he usually did..

,,Do not play for him." Lan Zhan's tone was a clear warning, his eyes fixed on his other half.

At this point the one dressed in purple was at a loss. He didn't know what to think of the situation, nor what was going on. Regardless of how his relationship was with his former brother though, there were things that even he felt went too far since.. the thought kind of grossed him out but: they were married after all?? His mind was still all over the place, he spoke up without even realising that he did. ,,He can play for whoever he wants. He's not your property but your husband. Is it normal in your sect to treat your partners in such a way? Dropping the nice surface, showing your true nature now?"

Wen Ning's eyes had widened in realisation after Lan Wangji had spoken up. That person was definitely the drunk version of the younger Jade of the Lan Sect. After taking a look at Wei Wuxian, who was clearly running things through his mind, too preoccupied to explain the situation, Wen Ning was about to clear it up himself before things would further escalate. However, he didn't get the chance.

,,Brother, what are you doing? It's not good for the wood to get wet. Apart from that, Sandu Shengshou is right. Young master Wei can play for who he wants." Lan Xichen had reappeared, but strangely enough.. He didn't seem to be overly upset over Lan Zhan's behaviour.

Even the two that had formerly realised that Lan Wangji was drunk, without being able to figure out how on earth he could get into that state, were now in a state of pure confusion. To worsen it the older Lan pulled Chenqing out of the snowmans head.. rubbed it dry, to everyone's shock, on his sleeve, and handed it back to Wei Wuxian with his usual smile.

,,Now that I think about it.. Young master Wei, your Chenqing and my Liebing would work so well together in a duet.. You and my brother have played together so often by now, it's a shame that we didn't get a chance yet."

By now everyone, even Nie Huaisang, knew that something wasn't right with Lan Xichen either. All their eyes were on the two jades of the Lan Sect, while Lan Wangji almost glared at his brother. The three on the ground were at a loss of words and thoughts. As if there had never been trouble between, them they exchanged a few glances as if to see if anyone knew what to do - none did.

To top it all off: Lan Zichen's expression changed, his eyes widened as if he had just gotten an idea. ,,Why don't we play one now? The sound in this setting is really good.. but.... Where is Liebing..? Did I forget it?"

They all - apart from Lan Wangji - watched the situation in horror, as the older Lan brother now even began to think about where his instrument was: While it was on him. He even patted down on himself a few times and somehow managed to miss it.

,,Oh.. Ooh.." It was only due to the sudden sound of a realisation kicking in, that came from Nie Huaisang, that everyone's attention left the twin jades. It seemed as if one strange turn of events followed the next.. This time it was that the one that never used a weapon, nor ran when in grave danger: Ran. Nie Huaisang ran to where the drinks were being handed out in a clear state of panic.

,,What the hell is going on here?" Jiang Cheng spoke up - the words he said were what everyone else was thinking.

While Xichen was still searching for Liebing, and Nie Huaisang was.. doing something as well, Wei Ying used the "calm moment" to get up. He closed the gap between himself and his husband, taking his left hand into his own in a light and gentle grip. ,,Lan Zhan, are you drunk?"

,,I am not." Was all the interrogated one said in a tone so confident only someone who was drunk could use.

Jiang Cheng blinked, he couldn't believe it. Just like Wei Wuxian he had already witnessed the intoxicated behaviour of quite a few people and not only did he never witness such as Lan Wangjis nor.. nor did it make sense that they suddenly were drunk. The Lan Sects Twin Jades drunk out of nowhere? That was like.. That was simply impossible and unimaginable.

,,Brother, do you know where I left Liebing?" Lan Xichen was clearly the chaotic drunkard. After spending the past two to three minutes searching, he turned to Lan Zhan in almost a desperate way.

The younger Jade pulled his hand out of Wei Wuxians, it wasn't a bad timing but it still threw the latter off.. just like the next thing Lan Wangji did: He took Liebing from his brothers side, due to his drunken state not so gently either, and held it in front of the lost owners face. If it wouldn't be for the normal, unchanging expression, and no words being spoken, one could almost say that Lan Zhan was pretty done with his brother.

As the Lan Sects leaders were having their little moment, Nie Huaisang had reappeared, whispering in a apologetic yet hurried tone. ,,I am so sorry, could you come with me for a moment?" Those words were directed at Jiang Cheng, Wei Wuxian and Wen Ning. The one that was already standing followed, the other two got up and did as well. Nie Huaisang was nervous, like a child that had been found faking its parents signature or something similiar to that. He was shaking, staring at the ground while stammering some words.

,,What on earth happened?", Wei Wuxian was the one to speak up in a bit of a upset tone of voice. It wasn't that he disliked drunk Lan Zhan, it just wasn't great for the Twin Jades to lose face in such a gathering. He even went on to, more or less, rip the fan Nie Huaisang was clinging to out of his hand.

,,I.. you see. I.... It's..." It must've been a horrible moment in life for the headshaker, yet as he stuttered more words that led nowhere.. well, he glanced up just to see both Jiang Cheng and his former good friend glare at him. His gaze met the ground as that happened, closing his eyes he spoke quick - probably to get out of there somehow. ,,During the situation between Sandu Shengshou and young Master Jin Ling.. my servants didn't pay attention and accidentally brewed the foreign liquor I prepared for the end of the event. It's a foreign liquor that you drink when it's hot, the taste also doesn't give away that it's alcohol.. I am so sorry.."

Suddenly everything made sense. The Lan brothers had gone to get tea, so short after the fight that the drink they had was the alcohol and not tea. It also explained why they had taken so long to come back.

Jiang Cheng rolled his eyes and glared at Nie Huaisang in a clear "You're a disappointment for the cultivaion world" way. Wen Ning had listened but had his back turned towards them so the Lan brothers were still being watched. Wei Wuxian, however, let out an audible breath while rubbing his cold hand against his forehead.

,,We can't continue here after all of that went on for today. It wouldn't be good for any of the sects and people involved. The juniors are still missing as well.." Wei Ying spoke out loud what was going through his mind, they could all agree with what he said. As he spoke up again, he looked at each person he asked to do something while doing so. ,,Wen Ning, Jin Ling wouldn't want to see me or Jiang Cheng right now. The Lan Sect Disciples went after him but do me the favour and search for them. Don't do anything unnecessary, just make sure they're safe. I will take care of Lan Zhan.. however.. Jiang Cheng, could you look after Zewu-Jun? I remember that he has helped you a lot years ago. It would be more trouble to keep them together right now and he doesn't really have anyone else.."

Wen Ning had nodded once he had gotten his instruction and was already on his way. Wei Wuxian had hesitated for a moment to ask his former brother to take care of the older Jade but.. even though Jiang Cheng looked at him with a raised brow, after they both looked at the Lan brothers that were acting like lost children, he nodded.

,,If I take care of him now then I'll have the advantage next time." Jiang Cheng said that with a smirk appearing on his face.. yet little did he know how the situation would turn out.Nie Huaisang kept apologising throughout the entire decision making process, yet at the end he was ignored and left alone. Lan Zhan wasn't hard to coax into going inside - it actually was Wei Wuxian who got pulled inside as soon as he and Jiang Cheng appeared beside the Lans. Drunk and jealous Lan Zhan was quite possesive, once Wei Wuxian felt the grip on his wrist as he got dragged away he knew exactly what would happen as soon as they were in their room.

Lan Xichen.. was a bit more difficult to persuade though.


	4. XiCheng (1): Did.. Lan XiChen just act cocky & provocative?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From here the story branches off to Lan Xichen x Jiang Cheng.
> 
> Even though I'll refer to it as room, those the guests have are like small apartments or like one main room that branches off to the others. Mostly like living room, bedroom and a small washing area/room.
> 
> The robes they are given are specially made for the event and each has like 2 that have their sects logo on them, their sects colors and just luxury material etc.

Lan Xichen really turned out to be a child when he was drunk. Within 10 minutes of trying his best, Jiang Cheng had sighed enough for 2 lifetimes at least. The older one was neither willing to go inside, nor did he really do anything outside either. He was.. simply staring around as if it was the first time that he was seeing the Nie Sects residence.

,,Let's go inside. Your clothes are wet & it's not gonna take long before it gets dark." Standing beside him, Jiang Cheng tried his luck another time.. & as if he had completely forgotten about it the older one of the Lan brothers looked down on himself. His clothes were indeed wet. The wetness was clearly climbing up his body as well. Now finally, he nodded, but instead of walking towards the door that led inside, he stopped again as he passed by the snowman that his brother had.. penetrated with Chenqing.

Without even looking over Lan Xichen stretched the hand that was holding onto Liebing out, he probably would've let it fall down if Jiang Cheng wouldn't have stood beside him - ready to take it, which he did. After that the older one of them bend down, took a handful of snow & carefully closed the hole that Chenqing had left behind. ,,Is it alright like that?"

Jiang Cheng didn't know from the sound of the others voice if he was getting asked or not, but as the one dressed in white then proceeded to look at him, he took a closer look at the snowman. ,,Well, usually there'd be stones used for the mouth & eyes, apart from that a carrot or so as the nose and sticks as arms.. Wei Yi-.. Wei Wuxian used his clothes sometimes as well." He wasn't too well, mentally, & since the secret about the golden core had gotten revealed he couldn't hate Wei Wuxian as much anymore, nor could he forget about.. about the fact that: wasn't everything that happened his own fault?

The smaller one of them really shouldn't have gone that far into detail about the process of building a snowman. As soon as he had finished his words, the older Jade took off his outer robe and swung it around the snowman, before going on to gather the things that had gotten mentioned. His artistic side really showed once everything was in place, nothing was misplaced. It looked good. Jiang Cheng was until then too shocked to do anything, however.. Taking his time to look up & down on the snowman, Lan Xichen didn't appear to be overly pleased. After a bit, he lifted his right hand up to his forehead ribbon, looking as if he was about to take it off.At this point the smaller one couldn't stay still anymore, he reached out & stopped the others arm midway, just holding his sleeve, while his expression showed some shock. ,,Wait. You can't do that. Wei Wuxian didn't know the meaning behind your ribbon back then but you should know." It was just a slip of the tongue caused from the shock, he didn't want to care but after everything that happened.. He regretted that he had never stood up for Wei Wuxian, or even apologised in his stead at the time of the Lan Wangji ribbon incident.

Again, as if he just realised, the older ones expression changed to a unspoken "Oh.." & continued to walk to the door. Jiang Cheng stood there, shaking his head, he took the robe from the snowman & rushed after the other. From there on they somehow managed to get inside the room of the Jiang Sect leader without a problem.. Having a bit of time to think, the sober half of the duo came to the conclusion that: while the younger Lan got even more strict and strange when drunk, the older one didn't give a damn about anything. Like not a thing in the world could get his mood down, it was almost scary - but more than that: both brothers drunk meant chaos, pure chaos.

Once they were inside Jiang Cheng put the taller males robe over the wall that seperated the living & sleeping area of the room before speaking in a normal as he could tone. ,,I'll prepare the hot water. Take a bath & then go to sleep."

,,But that's not my room."

As Lan Xichen said that the other couldn't help but think "Oh wow he noticed something", not that he said it out loud though. He wanted the trouble to be over as soon as possible, no matter the cost. With that said, putting Liebing on the table, he ignored the realisation of the older Jade & did what he had said. Not far into the preparation of the bath water the sound of Liebing then reached Jiang Chengs ears, it didn't overly bug him & fighting with someone who was like the playing one when they were drunk.. The regret over having come to the gathering grew & grew. Sooner or later the water was in the tub and the one dressed in purple came out of the bathing area with his sleeves up to his elbows.

The older one of them was sitting there by the table, playing Liebing almost without a pause like he was giving a concert. He only opened his eyes when he heard steps coming closer but finished the song before doing anything further. In the meantime his eyes were fixed on Jiang Cheng who grabbed a jaw of liquor, opened & pretty much drowned it in one go. The stare wasn't really intense, but enough to make the smaller one look over with a raised brow.

,,Can I have some of the liquor?" Lan Xichen asked with his usual smile, his voice sweet as honey.

,,Isn't drinking prohibited for you? Apart from that, I didn't prepare the water for nothing. It would be both disrespectful of you to leave it like that, after I went through the trouble of preparing it, & also bad for your health. I don't wanna have your uncle come to me complaining about the noise in the cloud recesses if you catch something." Jiang Chengs prior agitation was still lingering, he couldn't help that it was showing - or more so audible - without a chance to let himself cool down for a bit.

To his surprise though the older Lan brother let out an inaudible chuckle, a hint of a smirk appearing on the corners of his lips. ,,You are both wrong and right with what you said. Drinking isn't necessarily prohibited but if I should get sick it would either be seen as my own or the Nie Sect's fault. Now if you would excuse me, since you went through the trouble, I will take a bath." For the first time since he was drunk Lan Xichen acted as elegant as usual, getting up, he bowed & disappeared.

Jiang Cheng however was left behind with the jaw raised to his lips, staring at the spot where the taller man had sat until then. Was he getting paranoid, did the alcohol kick in that fast.. or was Lan Xichens way of wording things & acting just now.. rather cocky or provocative?


	5. XiCheng (2): Between Stunned & Provoked | 1

The entire ups and downs of the past hour left Jiang Cheng speechless. His mind was overflowing with a lot of things, to the extent where he couldn't really focus on a single one enough, to actually find a solution. Time was passing, not slow either & in his spaced out state, he probably could've gotten robbed from his room without a problem. It wasn't like him to really drink much when Jin Ling was around, another one of his many secrets, however, this time within around 15-20 minutes.. 3 jaws were empty without him even realising it.

Lan Xichen was by the time done with his bath. He felt quite good, relaxed. There hadn't been much of interaction with him and others in a long time, but now he thought that, maybe the seclusion hadn't been the right option to choose.. With that thought in his head, he stepped out of the tub and threw on one of the robes that was hanging there - originally for the younger one of them to wear - before he left the bath area with his hair still dripping wet.

The taller male was the first to react, what he saw was the Jiang Sects leader, surrounded from empty jaws of liquor. Jiang Cheng had his chin propped up on one hand, his cheeks flushed in a quite adorable shade of pink, while his eyes, that were seemingly fixed on nothing yet something at the same time, looked glazed.

It took a bit longer than usually for Jiang Cheng to react to someone approaching.. but as he turned his head, without changing his position over all, the view he got naturally made his eyes widen - whether in shock or from being stunned.. Well, he probably wouldn't admit anything, even if it was the second option. Lan Xichen was standing there, in a robe of the same color as Jiang Chengs, there were just more details & less cloth - it wasn't meant to be one you go out in, so that was only natural. However, in comparison to the white, or maximally light blue, that you would usually see the older one in.. Maybe it was simple bias towards the color, because of his Yunmeng roots, yet the way this clearly expensive type of material framed the others body.. with his eye, hair & skin color being complimented & highlighted so much more than in his Lan Sect robes.. As straight of a man as one can be, this picture would get anyone breath- or at least speechless. A bit of the taller ones chest was also showing, due to the way he wrapped his robe,.. Jiang Cheng just couldn't decide how he felt about the hair being so wet, somewhat messy, & especially the overly crooked forehead ribbon. Not that it didn't suit Lan Xichen, the sitting one just felt.. complicated inside, but he couldn't make out why, or in which way.

Jiang Cheng didn't realise how instense & lasting his stare had been, drinking so much within such a short frame of time had really gotten to him. It was only when Lan Xichen tilted his head, as if to ask what was wrong, that the younger one spoke up.

,,Your forehead ribbon, it's crooked as anything." There it was again, this bad habit of his, whenever he thought something nice about someone, he would end up saying something bad - or the opposite of his thought - instead. It was like his brain & mouth didn't cooperate at all. Not that it mattered at this moment, it wasn't like he was a cut-sleeve like a certain someone.

Hearing those words in his drunken state got the older Jade to react as well, in a way that he usually wouldn't behave. He was the chaotic type of drunk after all. With that said, as if he had heard nothing, Lan Xichen closed the gap between himself & the table. Once that was done, he reached out with his right hand and.. and simply pulled the ribbon off as if it was nothing, followed from his hair accessory. His long hair fell down, he looked even more outstandingly beautiful now, than all prepped up. Lan Xichen then went on to put his belognings on the table before sitting down - well, he more or less almost fell in the process - & ran his hand through his hair. However, due to how wet it was, the further down he tried to comb with his fingers,... it didn't work too well.

,,You're staring quite a lot!", it wasn't sounding intentionally so "hyped up" but again, his drunk chaotic self simply was this way. After he took a cup from the table, not looking at Jiang Cheng during most of the scene.

,,.." The younger one was at a loss of words, once again, it was the truth that he had stared at the other quite intensly for a while now. At the end only as he heard the sentence he managed to look away. ,,It's normal, doesn't happen every day that you're able to witness a drunk Lan Sect leader. You're known for your extreme obsession towards perfection." That was the best Jiang Cheng could come up with, glancing at the taller male out of the corner of his eyes. How couldn't someone feel puzzled or somewhat affected at least, even now, where Lan Xichen was simply filling his cup with liquor.. the way his dark hair fell over his shoulder, how concentrated he looked, as if it was a really hard task. It was also the first time that he saw the Jades forehead, so how could it be helped? It was nothing but natural,.. just natural.

,,You're not overly wrong with that, I must agree." Lan Xichen spoke while looking up, his tone still sweet as honey but more lively and child like. After taking a sip of the liquor and putting the cup back down, his gaze got fixed on his ribbon.


	6. XiCheng (3): Between Stunned & Provoked | 2

A short amount of time passed with silence between them, it was just about to reach the limit for Jiang Cheng where he would start to feel awkward inside, as the after bathing ingredients smelling one let out a sigh. The younger Sect Leader raised a brow, but before he could say anything the other began first, his tone low and not as hyper anymore.

,,Perfection & rules have always been a strong point of the Lan Sect. However, as far as I have heard, it was by far not to the extent that it is now.. before the incident between our father & mother unravelled. Uncle lost almost everything, in exchange for our father to be able to marry a women he loved - yet one he should've abandoned. It is a long story, a complicated one at that as well.. We were raised by our uncle, as strict as somehow possible. More & more rules got set in stone, literally,.. He had been the younger one, yet he had to obey to his fate & accept having to take the role that his brother was destined to have in his lifetime. After everything, he began to hold a grudge against the world of love, living his life alone. For him that was the only option, I guess one could say so. With the pain of the loss of his sibling & life, in his heart, he grew somewhat cold,.. while somewhat is still the nicer way to put it. But, excuse my trailing off, I don't think I have to explain how our uncle felt to especially you, Young Master Jiang."

Even though Jiang Cheng didn't entirely know what he was supposed to do in this ever changing turn of events, he could hear that it was a honest story. & the longer the other spoke, his hand that held onto the 4th jaw by then slowly sank back down on the table. It wasn't until the last few words that he really realised why he felt a "stab in the side". Now he finally also had the confirmation that Lan Xichen was actually being provocative, or more so.. rubbing things under his nose.. with a hint of sarcasm. The younger one threw a side glance at the other, brought the jaw back up to his mouth & took another huge sip of the liquor.

There was a twitch visible at the corners of Lan Xichens lips, yet he held back the chuckle, drowning his glass as well. After that however, he chuckled almost in a bitter way. ,,Fate surely is a cruel thing. You for example, are the last of your sect to bring forth a successor. Young master Jin has by now already accepted his own role. For me, I have always been destined to bring forth a successor as well. After all, my uncle had the worse, yet better fate. He could've lived how he wanted, since my brother & I would one day succeed the Lan Sect."

Jiang Cheng clenched his teeth at that part of the one sided conversation, he knew the time pressure. Also how much luck he would need to find a wife that would be loyal enough to keep his secret, but also able to deal with him. He knew himself that he was acting too much like his mother, or even too much like Lan Qiren, it was just that he neither knew how to stop that, nor how it would end, if he did. Once more, he remained silent, it got to him how similiar yet different their situations were - how couldn't it with so many overlapping points?

,,Self-restraint, perfection.. I know why you are so shocked and staring at me so much. I have taken in the voices of those around me since a long time. No matter how often you go through sect rules, or into seclusion, you won't be able to turn blind and deaf towards it all. For a long time, nothing truly pressured me, however.. after everything that happened, I can't help but debate if I am truly deserving of this praise. Of this way that the people that trust in me view me. Maybe it's just the aftermath of those events, but I have yet to find my answers. And as someone who is rather close to a person that can't convey his emotions overly well, I can tell that I am not the only one here who's searching for answers - yet unable to find them."

,,There are things we couldn't have known. Always letting those things linger-"

,,It's exactly because we should've known, because we should've noticed; isn't it? Because they were our sworn brothers." Lan Xichen, who had spoken in a normal tone about their dark moments, had gotten interrupted by Jiang Cheng, who didn't want to listen anymore. The older Jade was definitely good at hitting the spots that hurt, which the smaller one would've known, if he would've arrived at the time where Wei Wuxian was pretty much getting roasted from him. However, Lan Xichen turned the situation back around and interrupted Jiang Cheng's try to escape himself. There was a understanding smile playing on his lips & the same vibe in his eyes, as he looked at the other while saying those words in a matching tone.

Again, no word got spoken for a while & the Jiang Sects leader had given up the drinking. The older one of them did the same, after having his third cup for the day, he was dead drunk at this point, just like the other after 4 jaws. As he spoke up again, Lan Xichens voice was a mixture of a teasing and an honestly interested tone, his sitting position not as stiff while his eyes were fixed on Jiang Cheng. ,,How are things going for you? The rumours about your tries to find a wife have spread far, I'm not trying to be overly intrusive, but our situations are quite similiar."

Even without saying a word in response at first, the younger one of them let out a noise that made the doubt in those last words clear. He was almost a bit disgusted, again, mostly because of the alcohol & agitation caused from everything that was going on. ,,What's this situation? We're both the lone wolves that got cast together because those 2 want to fuck & because we have a few similiarities we have to turn into friends now? Want me to turn into your sworn brother straight away, did you still not learn anything?" Jiang Cheng couldn't let go of his facade, no matter how much he understood the intentions & emotions of another person.. He had a role in his life, that he could more than likely not even 100% fulfill, even after Wei Wuxian had given up everything for him to do so - simply because of this behaviour, yet.. He was scared of it all, scared of history repeating itself if he should let someone close again, scared of Jin Ling growing to hate him because he only dealt with everything in his life the wrong way. He was shouting his words, followed from a dark laugh, it was a sad scene - in several ways.

Lan Xichen's expression didn't even waver for one second, even if some things also hit wounds that were still bleeding deep inside of him: He was able to reap what he had sown. ,,If it wouldn't get to you & if I wouldn't be right, you would not react in such an intense way. We are in similiar situations, so why not use the chance to talk. After all neither of us would've anyone else, due to our own faults."

The still formally dressed one of them both, the more he got stabbed from the other, couldn't figure out the intentions behind it all. What was the point of it? On the inside he was already broken since hours ago, but now.. Now his expression changed into a pained one, his mouth was opening and closing, as if he was searching for antoher wave of words he could yell but there were none. He was backed into a corner, but with the remaining bits of his pride he pushed the table further towards Lan Xichen's side before getting up, it was too quick & due to everything combining he could barely stand. However, Jiang Cheng somehow managed it to the door, before a new & the - for him - worst wave swallowed him up.

,,I have noticed something strange several times that I've seen you by now. I wasn't too sure until earlier, but now I'm going to ask you directly. Are you purposefully avoiding any type of skin and physical contact with everyone? You're building up such strong barricades between yourself & others, even your own nephew. Am I mistaken, or are you in fact avoiding those matters?" Within Lan Xichen's tone, there was no question, he knew, yet he worded it in a way that would work as questions anyway. Not once had his gaze left the younger one.


	7. XiCheng (4): Between Stunned & Provoked | 3

Time stood still for a moment for the younger one, he was too intoxicated and agitated to recall that he hadn't just been found out, straight away. His expression, as he was turned with his back towards the Lan Sect Leader, showed shock, but the other didn't speak. However, even though his mind processed things slower, it was also by far more cruel, especially due to the stabs of the taller man. The scene of, by then, quite a long time ago came up in his mind, where they had all been in the temple and his former brothers secret, with that also his own, got exposed. Once he was able to recall, Jiang Cheng couldn't help but laugh, it was the dark type. His shoulders were shaking, while the hand that had been lingering in the air - ready to open the door - came up to cover his face.

After a few moments of laughing, like he was about to lose his mind, Jiang Cheng said a few words in a bitter, almost grudging tone. ,,So, the new Lan Sect's leader is quite cruel deep down inside, huh?" He didn't turn, nor did he run, but he began to laugh once more, while the hand that had been covering his face & the one that had been clenched into yet another fist by his side came up to where his robe was being held together.

In reality though, it hadn't been the case that Lan Xichen was trying to be sadistic, or cruel, in fact.. He was simply dead drunk and apart from that, the time in the temple had left his mental state torn. So many things had happened at the time, a lot that Jiang Cheng didn't even know about. He hadn't truly forgotten about the core matter, it just made "click" again in his memory once the younger one of them said those few words. Lan Xichen's curse word collection wasn't that big, but as he realised, his eyes widened and he did end up cursing at himself in his mind. His expression grew more pained as he watched the one from Lotus Pier expose his upper body, or well, at the time he could only see the back of him.

It truly was a scene that, if it was burned in your mind once, you wouldn't be able to forget it, not in a whole lifetime for sure. Just alone the back of Jiang Cheng was covered in scars, it was hard to make out the difference between those caused from a whip and other types of injuries. And sure, it wasn't the first time that Lan Xichen saw the reminders of whip injuries that were once sustained, but other than his younger brothers those were... deeper, they weren't made with pain and sadness over a boy risking his clan for his first love. The scars on Jiang Cheng's back were made with feelings of rage and digust towards him. Lan Xichens expression was unchanging, at least until the movement of the other made it clear that he was about to turn.. He knew that at this point apologising and saying he had temporarily misplaced the memory in his head, or something like that, wouldn't make anything better - if his words would even be seen as the truth.

As Jiang Cheng turned, so that he was facing the older one again, his expression was a facade. His head was titled slightly to the side & backwards, somewhat trying to appear taller than he was, while his over all expression was completed with a smirk.. he looked arrogant, almost as if he was mocking the other. ,,After having my secret exposed in front of pretty much any important figure of the current generation of Sect Leaders, the last thing I expected was getting asked - especially from the righteous & ever so nice acting older Jade - why I'm avoiding to get close to whoever is there, physically. I guess, with nothing but rules & cultivanional matters in mind, common sense or even empathy did come too short, huh? Why should a man that has once been in the hands of the Wen Dogs, a man that has once lost his core & a man that has gotten the core of his former brother implanted, avoid physical contact & have trouble finding the right wife? Maybe I should just fuck off and go out with this mess of a body of mine being exposed and reveal the darkest hours of my life to even more people. Should I just yell that the Yiling Patriarch just had to give up his sanity & life for my sects sake? Should I just go out now and yell that, in reality I'm a fucking good for nothing, on a lower level than this Nie Sects piece of garbage of a leader? It's nothing, right? You're so right, Zewu-Jun, we are so similiar."

The words that were filled with rage, bitterness and hatred got to the taller one.. He had fixed his expression somewhat, while the other had been in the process of turning to face him, and he did manage to keep it to a minimal amount of shock being visible on his face.. However, the sight was just.. even the way Jiang Cheng was talking, or more on the verge of yelling, was nothing but heartbreaking. Because, no matter how good of an actor he thought he was, it was clear that most of his negative emotions were directed at himself. Lan Xichen didn't know where to look, his senses weren't working as well due to it being the first time in his life that he was so drunk, but he could still see better than the average person.

The younger ones chest was a mess. There was the Wen Sects branding on the left side of it, over his heart, as if it would continue to make fun of him for the rest of his life. It was burned in deeper than that of his brother, you could probably feel most lines clearly even if there'd be no light left on this planet. Apart from that, there was a scar running far up and down, but also extremely deep, over Jiang Cheng's chest - the scar of the core implantation. Within the middle of this scar was another one, clearly not as old, from the time where he had gotten stabbed in the temple of secrets - which was quite the accurate way to call it for all of the attendants of the incident.

,,Got nothing to say, huh?" Jiang Cheng seemed far too pleased with himself, however, he had to lean against the door. The sudden movement and change in his mood had speed up the process of the liquor running through his system. He could just so keep himself upright at this point and even without the fight breaking out, he more than likely would've exposed himself anyway soon because of how hot he was feeling. After a few more seconds of indulging in the sight of the older one of them being speechless and shocked, a chuckle escaped from his lips before he diverted all of his attention to try and get his robe at least back on his shoulders.

It wasn't that Lan Xichen had nothing to say, he just didn't know where to start, or how it would change a thing, now that it had escalated so far. He didn't like to see other people suffer, that was his true self and more than likely the reason for why his drunk self was so.. intrusive, yet usually rather outgoing and hyper. He watched the entire scene in silence, yet as Jiang Cheng was about to dress up again, he began to move. The older one got slowly up from the ground and closed most of the gap between them. There was no ill intent going out from him, and as drunk as he was - he could see that if Jiang Cheng would try to use Zidian right now: He'd end up falling over himself in the process - so he wasn't even keeping a guard up. Leaving a foot width of distance between them, he stopped as the other looked at him with a expression that said "piss off",.. but neither was he effected by it, nor did it stop him from speaking up in a apologetic yet honest tone.

,,I apologise, I shouldn't have gone as far with my words. I guess, the alcohol has gotten to me. I've never been this intoxicated before, so I.. I didn't forget about what Jin GuangYao said about you, my mind was just too clouded."

As thought, Jiang Cheng replied to him with yet another disgusted noise and a degrading look. The younger one had barely managed to get his robe back over his shoulders, fiddling with the remaining bits that were supposed to cover his chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the next Chapter the NSFW content is going to start.  
> If you don't want to read those things, I will provide a Chapter where it ends differently, if you comment and ask for one. I have no problem with that.


	8. XiCheng (5): Sexual Tension Begins | 1

,,Can I see?"

,,For what?" Jiang Cheng was pretty done with it all at this point, interrupting the other in a tone to match how he felt. However, he also paused in his try to close his robe &.. well, there was a height difference between them, he had to look up & naturally met the clear, yet dark gaze of Lan Xichen. He had always hated that he wasn't only not as talented as all the others but also, out of the main disciples of the most prominent sects, one of the smallest. Not that he'd ever really count the Headshaker, or did so in the past, but right now.. he was already getting dominated in a sense & this little difference made him feel even more inferior.

Lan Xichen couldn't hold the attitude he was getting against the younger one, however, he also didn't back off nor avoid the eye contact they had. Showing the other a calm smile, that would make most ladies faint, before he spoke in a tone that was caring & still sweet as honey - half intentional, he wanted to turn the situation back into a better direction. ,,The Lan Sect has good medical cultivator. Not that we're as good as the side clan of the Wen's was once but, after my rudeness, I feel as though I have to make it up to you."

Jiang Cheng was just about to respond with a "no need" as the taller ones hands already pulled apart his robe. He was way too shocked & startled by this sudden action to even push the other away, his mouth opening & closing as his head moved up & down. The expression of the Lan Sect leader was completely professional, he looked concentrated, while Jiang Cheng looked as if he had been caught reading porn books by his mother. His face was red, back pressing further against the door, mind blank. The best way to explain his situation was to compare him to a wild animal that didn't have a flight reflex but the natural "i'm just not going to move" one - that ironically enough, the Headshaker always used.

To make it worse, as if it was the most normal of situations that could happen: Lan Xichen stretched out his hand & placed it on a scar that wasn't related to any of the incidents that included either Wen's or Wei Wuxian.

Jiang Cheng's breath hitched, in comparison to his from the intoxication heated skin the others was a tad colder, the muscles of his stomach pulled in automatically while, embarrassingly enough, his nipples hardened slightly. For a moment he gritted his teeth, staring at a spot at a wall across the room, he cursed at himself that from the surprise of it all his heartbeat was a bit all over the place. "It's just a physical examination", the younger one lost count of how often he said that to himself in his mind, already by the time that the other was at another unrelated scar.

What Jiang Cheng didn't notice, due to his self-manipulation, was that at each of his reactions, that were making it quite more embarrassing than the situation had to be, was that when each of them happened - Lan Xichen glanced at him. Every so often, there was a slight twitch coming from the corners of his lips. At this point, he wasn't really thinking about anything else but it being a physical examination, nor had he ever intended for it to go in another direction. However, he did, for the time being, purposefully leave out the two main scars at the front.

,,Could you turn around for a moment & expose your back?"

Lan Xichens gentle and calm tone caused the smaller one for the first time in a while to look at him. He had spaced out into his "It's just" world to the point where he was gone out. For a moment Jiang Cheng glared, not that it would work with his cheeks in that darkish shade of pink from.. not only the intoxication. However, like a good boy he turned, believing like before that if he'd just obey it would all be over quick,.. little did he know. After that he pulled the robe, that he had managed to dress back up in with so much struggle just a few minutes ago, back down. The good thing though, was that now he could stare at the door with no worries about facial expressions.

The older one of them couldn't help but let out an inaudible chuckle once Jiang Cheng had turned. His mind wasn't too innocent but he really didn't notice anything strange, nor did he think about it up to this point. Continuing the task he had given himself, he began at the top of the others shoulders. The scars of the whips had healed okay, but if they would've gotten better treatment & more time to heal, after being inflicted, they wouldn't have turned out as "horrible" as they were now. Most of Lan Xichen's attention was focused on the scars & the condition of the flesh, muscles & so on that were below them, not taking in many of the minor changes in body language, way of breathing & the back and forth in which the others heart was beating. However, it soon reached a point where he couldn't simply ignore it anymore, or turn a blind eye to it.. as if to confirm his guess the older Jade kept on paying attention to those scars on the lower back of the half naked one, without looking at them but more so the others entirety.


	9. XiCheng (6): Sexual Tension Begins | 2

Jiang Cheng hadn't lost his ability to feel in most of the scarred areas, there were some where he could feel more & others where he could feel less - over all he was lucky though. He had somewhat gotten used to the contrast between their body heat, his breathing had for a while remained steady as he had stared at the door in silence. The further down the gentle touch went on his back however,.. his eyes had widened, he didn't fear that the hand would slide too far down or into his lower garment.. What shocked him was that his breathing had hitched once as the sensation reached his lower back. He was trying his best to act it out, but the longer this area got inspected the stranger he felt.. His breathing was the first thing that he couldn't continue to keep to himself, it was getting heavier & each bit of air sucked in deeper. No matter how hard he tried, he wasn't used to that kind of attention & in this drunken as hell state he couldn't even help his eyes from falling shut. But again, as the fingers kept trailing ever so lightly over his skin he began to feel weak, having to shift his weight from one foot to another while his hand extended to hold onto the door handle.

Lan Xichen didn't know what to think of the situation, he wasn't using much strength.. but could it regardless be that the wounds still hurt? He was so intoxicated himself that, just seeing the body move with each breath due to his touch, accompanied from the heavy breathing & the erratic thumping heart that he could feel beating inside the younger ones chest.. There was a voice inside of him that said it shouldn't make him feel good, that he didn't even know if the other was just uncomfortable or not, but strangely enough it.. it did make him feel good. He had struggled with his feeling of self-worth & all of that a lot since a long time.. & as if he wanted to prove the voice in his mind wrong, to be able to keep induldging in this, he spoke up in a worried yet calm tone.

,,Does it hurt?"

It were those 3 words that ripped the Jiang Sect Leader out of his dazed moment. He couldn't fully describe what he was feeling, but it wasn't pain. However, as he opened his mouth to try & say so, the taller ones fingertips trailed over a spot that was right above his spine & lower garment. The grip to the door handle tightened, biting on his lower lip hard, Jiang Cheng's head fell forward. For a moment he was trapped into a state of pleasure, it must be one of his erogenous zones that he didn't know about. There was a twitch coming from his length, followed from a minimal sensation of his pants tightening. A shiver was the next reaction, as the taller one of them trailed over the spot once more, before it stopped & disappeared. For a few seconds Jiang Cheng wasn't mentally there, however as the touch disappeared yet the feeling kept lingering.. It was when his length twitched again, asking for attention, that his jaw dropped and eyes widened, the grip around the door knob loosened and tightened even more afterwards.

,,I-.. It doesn't. The scars just sometimes feel tight and uncomfortable." The first time Jiang Cheng tried to speak, his voice sounded so hoarse that he stopped straight away. After clearing his throat he began again, he was shocked by it all, it was a guy that had been touching him after all. The only thing that made it somewhat better was that, Lan Xichen either didn't seem to get anything, or that he was just being discreet enough to not let it on. He knew he had to get some fresh air, as soon as somehow possible, not that anyone would notice with how his clothes were falling over his problem, yet... he knew. It was complicated though, the door opened to the inside, he couldn't get out until the other was satisfied, and if he said he wanted to go out right now it would all be too obvious.

The reason why Lan Xichen stopped the movements of his hand was simple, yet both surprising & shocking for him as well. He had no experience himself, sure, he would at times tend to himself & it wasn't like he hadn't read one or two of those "educational yet explicit" books.. but he had always sticked to his plan: to keep his innocence until the day he would get married, or at least until he had found the woman he wanted to marry. However, he was a man, & just like with his brother.. the more self-restraint you put on yourself, at the end the harder it would be to resist, or control yourself, later on. It was one of the things that he wanted to change within his sect, especially after seeing so many times how battered & blue Wei Wuxian was, due to his brothers inability to control himself - when it actually mattered.

He had always been fine, but as he stroked over the soft and warm flesh of the other, watching him closely, while standing behind him.. the way Jiang Chengs breathing got heavier, his heartbeat being well audible,.. It was at the point where just mentioned ones head dropped and the loosening & tightened grip at the door knob, that the older one couldn't help it. His imagination turned sexual, he wanted to make the other shiver and move like that more.. There were positions he had read about popping up in his mind, his own hand this time clenched into a fist as he felt himself harden below the belt. The one thing he wanted more than to feel the pleasure himself, was making Jiang Cheng feel it, imagining all the expressions and reactions of that person, was at that moment in time the best feeling he had since so long. It took the barely dressed male almost all of his remaining self-control to not press the other against the door and destroy his clothing while teasing whichever spot his mouth would be able to reach.. In his imagination, his length was rubbing against Jiang Chengs behind while he stroked him &..

It was the first time in his life that Lan Xichen felt like he really needed to get out of a room, just far away from Jiang Cheng. His imagination was driving him mad, the way the others voice had sounded re-echoing in his head. The fact that the younger one also didn't move.. Get out, calm down, go to your room, the voice in his mind was so loud, throwing every possible phrase at him, to try and animate him to leave.. However, the thing he ended up saying, in a bit of a shaky tone, after not half as long as it might've seemed, was the entire opposite.

,,Could you turn back around, I want to look at the two worst scars."


	10. XiCheng (7): Sexual Tension Begins | 3

Regardless of how strong his urges were: Lan Xichen would never take someone by force. The reactions of the other could still be his misinterpretation, even though something inside of him doubted they were. Once he said what he did, he fixed his expression and posture while waiting for the younger one to turn, or respond. He also knew that, no matter what, Jiang Cheng wouldn't glance down to realise the state that he was in, yet even though that was the case, his expression was even more professional and his stare a lot more intense than before. However, someone with no, or not a lot of experience, wouldn't be able to tell 100% what it meant: It was hunger, the mens natural kind.

Jiang Cheng on the other hand had meanwhile used the time to fix his expression and clear his mind, as far as he could. He also began to regret that he only tended to himself once in a blue moon, when it was really necessary.. because even though he wasn't that hard, he knew that he would need to take care of his problem definitely this time. As the taller one then spoke up, Jiang Cheng flinched on the inside but straightened his posture on the outside. It took a few moments before he was stable & ready to let go of the door knob and as he turned, he fully believed that his facade was perfect. That he wasn't looking affected by the situation & instead calm, collected & still rather cold or distanced or.. anything that wasn't appealing or giving away what had happened.

However, the sight that Lan Xichen got was the entire opposite of that. The half naked males face was flushed, the trapped in heat kind of flushed, his eyes were glazed over and there was a look of pain inside of them. It was the kind of pain, or aching, that the older Jade had seen on his brother a few times. Mostly when Lan Wangji & Wei Wuxian couldn't engage in the physical activities of the adult world, but were forced to have a lot of provocative physical contact with one another. It was the look of pure need, the perfect completition to the hunger inside of Lan Xichen.. but he didn't take that as his confirmation or invitation just yet. Something like that wasn't enough to make a move on someone.

The taller one of them needed confirmation, for either way that the situation would continue in, soon - that much he knew.. And with that in mind, he made the bold move of closing the distance between them, as far as he could without exposing his problem. A feeling of defeat came over him though as Jiang Cheng turned his head slightly once their faces were too close,.. Lan Xichen didn't know if that was a clear no, it wasn't a push, or a line of curses getting thrown at him like he had expected.. However, he couldn't just back off now either & so he lifted his right hand, placed it on the Wen Sects branding on the others chest and trailed his fingertips along the lines.

What neither of them knew, since no words were spoken, was that they both cursed at themselves at the exact same time. While the younger one did so because his drunk body reacted, or betrayed him, even more at such a light touch,.. Lan Xichen was cursing at himself for just the state he was in.

However, there was no denying, due to the heartbeat that he could feel from how close his hand was to the others heart, that he wasn't the only one who felt something.. Lan Xichen couldn't have possibly guessed that wrong.. and he saw it as further confirmation as he glanced down, just to see the hand of the slighty smaller one clenched into a tight fist. Just mentioned one even seemed to hold his breath to an extent, or force himself to a certain rhythm and way of breathing. He spend a good few minutes on the branding, before changing his position so that he could take a closer look at the long scar between Jiang Cheng's chest.

It was at this point that the smaller man turned his head back, he could just so take a glance at the top of the others head with a portion of his eye area every so often. Even with his last bits of pride doing their best, Jiang Cheng had read enough sexually explicit books to know that.. if the other would just kneel down.. He couldn't believe his own thought, his breath that he had held in came out shaky without him even realising it. They had been so close until seconds ago, that he felt the Lan Sect leaders hair tickle his skin, his breath was still doing so.. Even the facial features were something the exposed one took in, until he had to look away, not knowing that the other saw it as a bad sign.. He had just looked so.. mesmerising. The long eye lashes, the fair skin with no flaws on it, the nose, eyes, the way his hair had fallen into his face... Jiang Cheng wasn't able to take it in at the time, but he hadn't seen Lan Xichen as another man, just as such a stunning individual, that he couldn't help but have to look away.

The taller one noticed the subtle things, especially the movement from above, he was too aware of everything about this person at the time. Whatever would happen, he'd react to it. He was at the long scar still, but the voice inside of his head, that had failed to make him leave, changed it's attitude in defeat. "It's now or never, if you want to risk it." Once each last bit of restraint was gone, Lan Xichen lifted his head, neither too fast nor too slow, his hand remained flat on the others chest.. None of that mattered anymore though, the timing, position, everything was spot on perfection.

Their faces were close. So close that, if either of them just slightly tilted their head and leaned in, their lips would collide. Jiang Cheng's eyes widened, however as his gaze travelled over the others face and got locked on those dark, clear, eyes that showed no sign of wavering or being unsure.. He swallowed, audibly.

It could good and well have taken a minute, or even some time longer, where they simply stared at each other. Both of their breathings went heavier, their gazes travelling around one anothers features for any type of "yes" or "no" or who was supposed to do what now. At the end, Lan Xichen also swallowed audibly, the tip of his tongue wetting his lips that felt so dry. The tone in which he spoke up was a whisper so shaky and full of desire, that regardless of him standing firm while gazing into the younger ones eyes.. the inner fight, that made him feel like he was about to collapse or faint, was far too noticeable. He wasn't even clear enough in his mind anymore at this point to choose his words in a way that wouldn't reveal how he felt, even if his tone would've differt.

,,As far as I can tell.. the wounds have healed well.. they would've just needed better treatment.. and more time.. to turn out less severe... However, I think there are ways in which I can help you... I want to make you feel better in your own skin.. I want to make you feel good.."

Until Lan Xichen had spoken up, Jiang Cheng hadn't pushed him away because he was paralyzed from shock. Shock from so many things.. What made the difference to him then and got him to give in on the inside, were those words. He hadn't often been complimented, or spoken to and about in nice ways,.. not that he was deserving of that, with the way he treated others but he was probably even worse towards himself. Hearing such phrases, it could've more than likely been from anyone at this point where he was mentally torn apart to the maximum and he would've wanted the same as the other person. It was a wish that he hid away so deep down inside of himself that he wasn't aware of it anymore: He wanted to stop feeling bad, stop feeling bad about himelf, about how his life had turned out,.. for no matter how long, or short, it would be possible.

With each word the taller one had spoken he had moved as minimally closer as he could, while refraining from tilting his head, so that their lips would meet. It was one of the hardest struggles he had to endure, one of the only things he had wanted so badly in his life.. but there was a sign missing, he was neither getting pushed away nor invited.. However, just as he was about to give up, pull away and let out the breath he had unconsciously held in: Jiang Cheng's hoarse, yet serious, low voice reached his ears.

,,Do it."


	11. XiCheng 8:  First Kiss

,,Do it."

Even though Jiang Cheng only said those words once, they re-echoed in the older males mind, he glanced up to meet the others gaze, with his own showing both surprise and relief. He gave the younger one a short moment to rethink, before slowly tilting his head to the left. The process of closing this almost non-existent gap between their lips felt so long, but somehow.. that made it even more intense and worth it.

The moment where their lips met, due to having his hand still on the others chest, Lan Xichen could feel both of their heartbeats pause and pick up the same pace, at the same time. He couldn't help but smile, leading the kiss for a while before Jiang Cheng joined - probably once he had either accustomed to the situation, or simply knew how to. It was a kiss that was as slow as the pace they had needed to get there, but also just as long, intense and deep. Nothing like the first kiss the two in a room not that far from theirs had.

Sooner or later, hesitantly, the Lan Sect leader let their lips part - as little as he could -, then he glanced at the other and swallowed as he did. He was trying to ask, without breaking the silence that felt too natural and good, if he could deepen it further. To his surprise, Jiang Cheng looked at him, with eyes as half lidded and clouded as his own, before he felt a touch on his lower back with a cold item on it. He got the hint, it was the hand on which Zidian was - and it's owner clearly didn't want them to part.

Now that he had gotten the permission, Lan Xichen leaned back in, lightly trailing the tip of his tongue over the others lips. He was a bit sneaky though, knowing how his "lover" had reacted before, the older Jade pressed his lower half against him. The length of his was erected around halfway and not the smallest, which could be felt already now - no matter how needy or prepared one would be: Your jaw would definitely give in, especially if you were thinking of yourself as straight: like Jiang Cheng did. Just like he had guessed, once the jaw of the one born in Yunmeng gave in and his lips parted, Lan Xichen let his tongue begin to part them further. To not overdo it, he paused after trailing it once over the others, gently, as if he was trying to comfort the wet muscle, or tickle it awake.

Jiang Cheng couldn't believe what was going on, nor with whom it was happening.. but more than anything: He couldn't believe that he actually liked it. His mind was working to an extent at least still, trying to reassure himself with words such as "It's just your body reacting", all those lies one would tell themselves.. That was at least until the older male had stopped the kiss, his length had twitched a few times during it, in the end the movement to stop the other from walking off came so natural.. However, his jaw dropping at the feeling of the more erected problem of Lan Xichen, wasn't only because of that, but because something inside of him felt.. terribly pleased. He wasn't educated enough when it came to love, sex and all those matters to know how much it could boost ones ego, or make a person feel good about themselves, when a woman or man got stimulated because of them. As the taller ones tongue teased his for the first time, he didn't react on the outside, however, the second time it occured - he gave in.

Hesitantly and in a not overly skilled way, his wet muscle began to tease and dance along. Not much time passed from there until the taller one began to move his hips every so often as well. At the third of the motions both let out a aroused, shy noise of pleasure in sync, then their eyes met after they had held them closed shut for quite a while.

Jiang Cheng's hand had tightened around the rather thin cloth that was covering his body, Lan Xichen had felt that. It was incredible how much one could feel, smell, taste and take in all at once. He also had taken in how the younger one somehow tried to keep the control, which was slightly amusing yet also strengthened the tall mans trust into his over all guesses. Apart from a change in the direction in which he had tilted his head, Lan Xichen purposefully didn't make another move before he felt that his lover's length was around halfway awake - his own by then almost rock hard. It wasn't that he wanted to make him too needy to be able to resist, but there was something inside of him that did want to see what would happen, if he'd try to take the control, once Jiang Cheng was in such a state.


	12. XiCheng 9

With that said, once the time had come, Lan Xichen moved both of his hands so they were placed on the quite well formed ass cheeks of the younger one. Without giving him a chance to protest much, he proceeded to lift him up and wrapped his legs around his waist. Now Jiang Cheng was forced to either hold onto his robe, or hold onto his neck, at least if he didn't want to fall down backwards.

,,What are you doing?!" Even though the younger sect leaders natural reflex was to grab a hold of something, his now audibly drunken tone was filled with shock & rage while his expression showed more of pure embarrassment & shock.

,,As far as I know, it is called carrying someone."

,,Don't fuck around and talk like I don't know what that is! Let me the fuck down, I can walk damn fine on my own!!"

Lan Xichen had to scratch the thing he had thought of earlier from the list of the hardest things he had to hold back, resist from and all of that. It wasn't having to refrain from touching this certain person.. It was having to hold back his laughter: Right now. Jiang Cheng looked and sounded like a child that didn't want to go home from the playground yet, saying it was old enough to stay behind.. The older ones eyes shimmered with amusement, his cheeks puffed up from the air he held back with pressing his lips together, to not burst out laughing. Even dead drunk, he was the entire opposite of his brother and even more of a sunshine. After a few times of his body shaking in a desperate way, due to it wanting to release the wave of laughter, he let the air escape and ended it with a chuckle that made his stunning face look a lot more boyish and sweet.

All that happened while the koala bear version of the Jiang Sect leader was clinging to and looking at him in horror, as if he was getting humiliated in the worst possible way.. Lan Xichen let out a heavy breath, smiling a almost loving one. ,,You really can't let go of the contol over a situation, can you?" His tone wasn't scolding or anything like that, it was half a realisation, a little sad in its undertone.

Jiang Cheng glared, his response came quick, without thinking and in a slightly pissed tone. ,,What control? What do you know? What's there to control right now-"

,,Exactly. No need for control, so why are you trying to keep it?" The taller one was a bit more serious this time, while Jiang Cheng now showed an expression of realisation from having fucked up his words. Without giving him another chance to speak, but to calm down, relax and think, Lan Xichen walked them into the bed area of the room.

,,If there's no need for control then why are you taking it?"

Lan Xichen looked at the other with a head tilt, he stopped walking once he stood at the lower end of the quite big, comfortable looking bed, with an expression that was a bit of a "does he even realise how he acts right now", without those words being said.. Because, the way Jiang Cheng acted was really like a child. However, if he wanted to play that way, the older one of them would join in.

With a semi skilled motion he wrapped one arm around the smaller males waist and crawled onto the bed, so that the other was able to lay underneath him. Then he pulled away and sat at the edge of the bed, as if nothing had ever been going on, his expression calm and relaxed.

Jiang Cheng was feeling humiliated, not only had he just been carried to the bed like a maiden, after losing his first kiss to the Lan Sect's leader.. his words had also been turned around in his mouth, because his first try to fight back got interrupted.. and now, after getting riled up to this point.. What?! What the hell was going on? Was he really getting ignored now? He was too drunk to put 1+1 together. He didn't get that he had told the other not to take the control, which meant that he would've to make a move himself. The half naked one was a literal child, the realisation seemed late but so true: He had just gotten toyed with the entire time! It couldn't be anything but that. Once it had made click, in his drunken world, he covered his face with his hands, laughing in his typically slightly insane way, one of his legs pulled up so it was bent at the knee. After a while he stopped, prepped himself up on his elbows, then he glared at Lan Xichen before speaking in a tone that sounded so disgusted and mad.

,,So that's it now? Is that how you Lan Sect people do things? Messing with someone then sitting there, as if nothing ever happened, if you don't get what you want? I'm honestly starting to feel more and more sorry for Wei Ying, the longer I watch you two wannabe perfect brothers facade fall apart."

The older one let his lover have his moment, he wasn't even really listening. He had expected that Jiang Cheng wouldn't get it, but at the same time.. He felt as if the half naked male really needed to learn his lesson when it came to his choice of words, what they could cause and all of that. When the other was done, Lan Xichen turned his head, a amused smirk playing on his lips, which matched his tone that was a bit provocative as well.

,,Do you somtimes listen to yourself while talking? Didn't you tell me just a few seconds ago that there is no need for me taking the control and that you don't want me to take it? If you always continue to never say what you truly mean, what you have to say, or anything similiar to that, you'll never get what you truly want. Do you even know what you can, or have to do with a man, or yourself - Or did you simply want to push me away, or have the control?"


	13. XiCheng 10

Jiang Cheng's expression dropped the more he heard, it was his habit. The worst of all of them. No matter what he truly thought, as long as it was positive, or could bring him closer to someone else: He'd end up saying the most disgusting things, or the opposite instead. At the end, he had to avert his gaze, turning his head while clenching his teeth. It took a bit and a lot of his strength, as well as concentration, before he managed to speak up in a barely audible tone that had both shame and shyness in it.

,,I turned out too much like my mother.. I know that, I've always been unable to actually say things the way I mean them. At this rate, I'm going to lose it all. Jin Ling already comes to me less & less, a lot of my servants and disciples rather run, than to be under my rotten care, women.. I had 3 blind dates, I wouldn't be able to meet a maiden otherwise. Even those I met ran after a few minutes. To be honest, I don't know what the hell I'm doing with my life, nor how the fuck I'm supposed to turn it back around before colliding with the wall that is approaching faster and faster. Apart from that, no, I don't really know what to do. I mean, with a man there should only be 2 options. Hand, mouth, it feels weird talking to a neat freak like you about those matters."

The taller man didn't move, even though he mentally prepared himself to get dressed and leave, regardless of his lower half being wide awake. However, he wouldn't leave now unless told, sitting there in silence he had turned his head and began to stare at the wall in front of him. As Jiang Cheng then spoke up, saying what he did, it wasn't anything that Lan Xichen hadn't known about before, but he let out a heavy breath while thinking at the same time: "Finally.". He was aware of it since a long time, that if everything would stay the way it was running since years, neither the Jiang Sect nor Jiang Cheng would be long lived, or meet a good end. Regardless of his initial relief, he couldn't help a chuckle at the ending of the others speech though.

,,First of all, I want to thank you for talking to me. I know it must not be easy, but I have to agree with the way you think about your future. If you keep everything like it is now, nothing good will come out of it. I also am debating the future of my Sect.. There are things I want to change, the self-restraint for example.. It is a rule that appears like the right choice, in theory, yet there are a lot of negative points to it. However, while I do prefer cleanliness, I must clear up a few misunderstandings. There are more things to.. sex between men, than using ones mouth or hands, you can complete the act with the correct preparation being done prior. Regardless of how heated and unbearable my situation might be for me, I wouldn't expect my partner to do anything they don't want to do, or have done to them - which would count the other way around as well. I wouldn't expect anyone to be in a position, or do something, that I wouldn't put myself in, or that I'm willing to do myself."

Jiang Cheng was both shocked and surprised at the speech that the older sect leader began. His eyes widened here and there, in both interest and shock. Somewhere during he sat up, staring at the others side profile while he was running a hundred and one things through his head.

,,Where do you know that from? I didn't expect you to be a cut-sleeve."

As his speech got interrupted Lan Xichen turned, the second sentence was said in such an honestly surprised way, after all that had already happened between them with NEITHER saying no.. that he couldn't help but give Jiang Cheng a look to match. He then watched as just mentioned ones eyes widened yet again in a realisation of how dumb he was when talking.

,,I've known since a long time that my brother has been interested in Young Master Wei. It wasn't even that long after they first met, when I found a book about those matters in the library pavillion. I had to take it away, so our uncle wouldn't find it. Needless to say that, since he is my younger brother, I went through it to see where his life was heading to. Ever since they came together, there are more and more of those books lying around, so you could say purely theoretically I'm rather educated. I must admit, however, that I don't agree with everything they do. They have their roles set in stone. Young Master Wei's physical conditions at times.. is rather worrying. I don't know how many differences there are in gay men, yet I strongly believe it will one day cause issues between them. After all, a man is born to... please, not be pleased.. Apart from that, if you don't know how the.... receiving part feels, things like those between my brother and Young Master Wei will occur. It's the same with fighting, if you've never had a broken bone before, the chance is higher that you'll injure even a person you like, than when you already experienced it yourself. They are the reason why I want to change the restraint rule, but also why I wouldn't put myself, or someone else, in a position I wouldn't be in myself.."

There were a few pauses in between of his words at the parts that were rather embarrassing, yet over all even during those serious matters his voice sounded a bit hyper. He could see that Jiang Cheng was overwhelmed and stopped himself from trailing off further. Once he did, he turned around so that he was sitting cross-legged on the bed, facing the tsundere.

,,Right now however.. I would go as far as you allow me to - and stop whenever you want me to.. The other way around, I must say at the moment it doesn't matter what, or if you even do anything to me. As I said before, I want to make you feel good, that alone would give me a lot of pleasure.. I can be a bit clumsy and rough at times, so even though I'll try my best, I apologise-"

,,Could you shut up already? How can someone say so many shameless embarrassing things in a row.. You're drunk worse than Wei Ying.." Jiang Cheng was flustered as anything, if they wouldn't sit on the blanket, he would've more than likely covered himself with it. How could one feel naked and exposed without even being it? However, he once more regretted his words as soon as he had said them out loud because of the taller ones reaction.

Lan Xichens expression showed pure amusement and provocation, his brows raised in a "Oh~" like way. He really didn't have much of stiffness to him once he was drunk, he was pure chaos and embarrassing as anything.. A true daredevil, that forgot about all rules and did what he wanted, wherever he wanted. The way he looked, the vibe in his expression re-echoed in his voice as he said two simple words.

,,Make me."


	14. XiCheng 11

,,Do it." ------ ,,Make me."

Jiang Cheng didn't take it in at the time, that the older one of the two of them was playing a rather skilled game with him. He was luring him out of his comfort zone, yet always ended up giving him the chance to take the control back afterwards, as a treat.

It wasn't any different right now, where Lan Xichen was staring at him so intensely that he couldn't even avert his gaze. After a minute of going through the options that he had in his mind, Jiang Cheng reached out, grabbed the cloth that was covering the others chest and pulled them in a sideways laying position. It were equal grounds with that, no one had to play either role - at least just yet. However, the movement had been so sudden and the pull so quick and strong that.. they bumped into the bed with quite the impact. Their hair were a mess, especially the taller males that wasn't tied up, was hanging all over his face.

Lan Xichens body began to shake badly, this time he couldn't keep in the far too heartfelt slightly loud laugh. For a moment he propped himself up, changed the position of his hair and laid back down. The fact that Jiang Cheng kept such a serious, prepared expression made none of it all less hilarious. He was too much of a Tsundere though, one that slowly got enough of the humiliation. Once more he glared at the older male, before he went about turning away, onto his back. He was mistaken though, if he believed that that would be it, or work, Lan Xichen wasn't going to let him get away that easily, now that they had gone that far already.

With a quick, swift motion the older Jade rolled over, on top of the more or less pouting one. Propping himself up on his arms he leaned in to his "lovers" ear and whispered in a serious, almost desperate tone ,,Don't run away. I apologise for my behaviour..". As innocent as he wanted to sound, when he changed his position once more so their eyes could meet, he looked like a young, wild god of some magical kingdom.. His hair almost worked as a curtain between them and the outside world, a light shade of pink covering his cheeks, the robe was slowly falling apart from all the movements. The view Jiang Cheng got in that moment was the trigger for the one that Lan Xichen could see. Flushed face, eyes widened - in a clearly mesmerised way - , neither could help their own breathing grow heavier again.

As if to test him once more, Lan Xichen leaned in to the half naked ones lips, keeping his gaze fixed on just mentioned ones reactions as far as he could. However, Jiang Cheng's body gave in, it had already memorised the way the other made him feel, his eyelids closed and chin lifted slightly - a clear invitation. They kissed slowly, yet deep for a good 10 minutes, not wasting much of it with no tongue involvement this time,.. The next movement came from the taller male again, carefully and slowly - but with no hesitation -, putting pressure between the half naked ones legs, it was a natural thing that his body wanted to move into the gap they'd hopefully form. For a moment the kiss paused, before Jiang Cheng's tension faded enough to do as asked, a shaky breath escaped from the invited ones lips as he slid between the parted legs and continued.

Lan Xichen smiled a little, for a while at least, giving them both time to get accustomed to what was going on, all bit by bit. He wasn't the only one with natural urges and reactions though.. at some point Jiang Cheng wanted to feel something more intense himself, his hand - like before - found its way to the wild god's lower back. Just that this time, he made the rather bold move to pull their aching areas together. The Lan Sect leaders eyes widened, both of their bodies shuddered at the contact, followed from the first few thrust like motions both of them did with another person. It didn't matter that neither was inside, or even undressed, at this point.. but first of all were they both virgins and second, they had ended up in this situation with one another, because they wanted the same: A long while of escaping the world of trauma and pain.


	15. XiCheng 12

Neither of them was aware of how much time was passing, yet the impatience was starting to make the Jiang Sect leader's body move more and more regularly, as if he was searching for a way to relief the tingling, all over the place, restless way he was feeling. The older one of them wasn't in much of a better state, even if he wasn't acting like a fish on land. As if he had waited for this, Lan Xichen pulled away from the kiss,.. what followed next was for each of them in a different way the sweetest and most pleasurable kind of torture. Without leaving a single spot of skin untouched, the wild god began to kiss, lick, nibble and suck his way down the others body. Jiang Cheng didn't dare to look at him, however, he was feeling so hot and heavy, reacting stronger at some, and less severe at other parts that got teased. A note they both made to themselves though was that, not only did Lan Xichen spend quite a bit of time indulging in the nipple play, but to Jiang Cheng's embarrassment.. he himself actually couldn't hide that he didn't find it so bad either, in fact, he was feeling it quite a lot, already now.

There was no word getting spoken, yet their bodies said enough. Breathing, heartbeat, neither was any less of a mess when it came to those matters. Once all of the younger mans upper body had been caressed and paid attention to, Lan Xichen sat up, he watched each reaction of the laying one closely as he began to undo the remaining bits of just mentioned ones upper robe. It wasn't until the only one with some knowledge about the gay sex world began to pull on his pants, that Jiang Cheng looked up in pure shock. Lan Xichen paused, smiled and spoke in a reassuring tone.

,,I won't do anything you don't want me to. Do you want to undress yourself?"

It was neither a yes, or a no, the startled guy was too prideful for both options, yet he also only realised now that, no matter what he'd say or do.. He wouldn't be able to save face at all. However, just like Lan Xichen had guessed, the smaller one couldn't give up that much control. The last few bits of Jiang Cheng's pride came together, causing him to actually get rid of his lower garment himself before he threw them off of the bed, accompanied by his shoes.

Lan Xichen let out a sigh, he would just let the other get on with it for the time being. It wasn't like it really hurt and he wasn't too sure what he would've done if the roles would be reversed either. Giving Jiang Cheng some time and space, he loosened the remaining bits of the robe he was wearing, about to take it off as to his surprise.. the younger male spoke up in a tone that was such a strange mixture between hurried and hesitant, while at the same time sounding shy but ashamed, that once it reached both of their ears they blinked repeatedly, in equal confusion.

,,Could you keep that on..?"

One thing Jiang Cheng knew was that with the way he worded it, there was no chance that his initial point would come across. The way the older ones expression changed to a bit of a defeated one, before he managed to pull off a understanding smile, verified that. Watching how Lan Xichen was about to close his robe again, he reached out in the spur of the moment, not risking to say the wrong words again. Grabbing a hold on both sides of it, the smaller male pulled them back in the position they had been in before, the wild god on top of him, his own legs spread enough for neither being uncomfortable. Jiang Cheng couldn't see how wide eyed Lan Xichen was, he had closed his eyes, taking and letting out a deep heavy breath before he said.

,,I didn't mean as in stay dressed for fuck, I meant keep it on like that. The color... isn't too ugly on you, i guess." His tone was a more than clear desperate try to sound casual and calm.

Knowing that those were probably the most true to his heart words that Jiang Cheng could come up with, the taller man didn't waste a second. He felt a strange warmth in his chest, as he let their lips collide and tongues begin another hot tango. The plan had been a different one, but Lan Xichen threw it away. Not long into it, he shifted his weight on his left arm, not breaking the kiss as his right hand began to trail, ever so lightly, downwards on Jiang Cheng's upper body. The destination was clear and the younger one shivered once or twice.. Then both of their breath's stopped in sync, due to different reasons, as the wild god trailed his fingers over the hardened length of his lover. For one of them it was the first time to feel someone elses hand on him, for the other it was the foreign yet familiar feeling of a shaft inside of his hand. Jiang Cheng wasn't entirely erect, but the size was already now nothing to be embarrassed about.


	16. XiCheng 13

After drawing a last teasing line all the way down and back up on the younger males shaft, Jiang Cheng's breath got sucked in audibly, before getting exhaled in a shaky manner. The reason for that, was the same as why Lan Xichen's breathing stopped, he had broken the kiss and wrapped his hand almost too loosely around the others throbbing cock. It was the one thing they were both familiar with, yet not in that way. Jiang Cheng's body remembered how good it would soon make him feel, if the hand would continue those slow, gentle yet passionate motions,.. And while the older one was quite aware of how it would feel for his lover, it was for both of them equally as foreign.

Lan Xichen's plan had originally been a different one, but he dismissed it - at least for now - because the naked one underneath him seemed to have reached his limit, when it came to remaining patient. It was almost like a weird error in his brain, feeling the length in his grip, due to it being his first time to hold another man like that.. he automatically began the routine he would use on himself, as if it was his own body. It didn't happen too often that he would tend to himself, but when he did, he would take his time. He had heard of rumours and believed so himself, that if you would rush certain things,.. the quality when it mattered wouldn't be as high, or the endurance, however one may want to call it. That the kiss got paused though, was because of his own urge from earlier.. He wanted to see as many reactions as possible, burn them into his mind. Making the other feel pleasure, was giving him his own, in a way that he couldn't fully comprehend.

The Jiang Sect's leader was the entire opposite though, usually. He would only take care of himself when it was absolutely necessary.. and then he would also try to get it over with as quick as possible. Mostly, because he felt that, should he get used to it too much, it would be even more unbearable. Right now, however, his body was memorizing all the tiniest things that were getting done to him. All the spots the wild god had touched with his mouth remained overly sensitive, almost as if they were burning their way inside of him.. Not many of those foreign strokes were needed before he was fully erect and leaking the first drops of lust.

From there on, for a while, they were each trapped in a dazed state of pleasure. Lan Xichen was getting so lost in those expressions and reactions of the entirely exposed man, that he really didn't take in the fact anymore that it wasn't his length he was tending to. It wasn't until Jiang Cheng's lips parted and a soft rough sounding moan escaped from him, that he got fully sucked into the pleasure that making someone else cum was. His head shut off, the grip around the younger ones length tightened minimally and sped up, yet the rhythm of them always remained perfect. While Jiang Cheng was pretty soon after unable to hold back his moans more and more, the thing they both had in common was, that their breathing and heartbeats were all over the place.

They were unintentionally riling one another up with each new little thing, like a chain reaction triggered by insanity - which in turn was caused from pleasure. While it was the older mans hand that caused Jiang Cheng to moan, it were in turn the naked ones moans that caused Lan Xichen's hand to move faster. The more Jiang Cheng twitched, the more daring Lan Xichen got, until his thumb circled around the younger ones glans each time it reached the top, occasionally - and soon just as often - teasing the little slit where the thick pre-cum was leaking out from. It was one hell of a game, during which the older one himself turned into a leaking, twitching mess, without realising it. Only an embarrassingly short amount of time passed, before the knot within Jiang Chengs lower stomach had tightened, his breath was a wild panting more than anything.. One of his hands tugged on the sheets, while the other in this pure moment of heat grabbed a piece of robe on Lan Xichens back. At the end, Jiang Cheng let out a weak, choked and overwhelmed sounding curse as his body tensed from head to toe, head burying in the pillow underneath it.

Lan Xichen wasn't aware of how close the other was, until he heard the cursing and felt the length harden to the maximum. Before he could even react, in the way that he wanted to, the build up of weeks got spilled over Jiang Cheng's stomach. The uncontrolled twitching within his hand, now accompanied by the scent of lust that soon reached his nose.. As clouded as the taller ones mind had already been, something inside of him got triggered. An animal instinct of many evolitions before, maybe.

The climaxing Jiang Cheng was far too lost in the waves of it, getting drowned even from the aftermath, to take anything in that was going on around him. That was at least until he felt something so extremely soft, yet wet, wrap around him. Having just cum once, his back arched as the grip onto the sheet, that he was clinging to with his left hand, tightened. It was a sensation that he couldn't explain, and for a while he was too overstimulated as well as by far too sensitive to try and figure out what was going on.. All he knew was that he wanted to feel more of it, he didn't want it to stop.


	17. XiCheng 14

Naturally, as the second knot tightened within him, at an even quicker pace, but also way more intense than the first.. His free hand lifted up, yet what he felt wasn't what he expected at all. It caused his eyes to fling open, trapped within his dazed state of pleasure, he regardless somehow managed to prop himself up on his elbow. He was a moaning mess, yet the view he got made his eyes still widen in shock.

At some point halfway through Jiang Cheng's first release, the older man had changed his position. Neither realised fully what he did. Without hesitation, driven from hunger and lust alone, Lan Xichen had wrapped his lips around the length that was spilling quite a lot of liquid. The foreign sensation that the younger Leader had felt was Lan Xichen pleasing him with his mouth, not overly skilled, yet the passion within each of his sucks that went deeper & tighter the longer it went on, made the difference. One could have as much skill, the true magic was to make, whichever gender your lover was, feel desired..

Not only was he clearly desired, but the sight he got was the uncensored confirmation of that. Lan Xichen was glancing up at him, every now and then, in between of his sucking motions, his eyes a little bloodshot, overflowing with lust and hunger. The thing Jiang Cheng's fingers had gotten a hold of were the others long hair.. and embarrassingly enough the scene not only got him to tug a little harder on it, but his length also twitched. It was something that probably neither of them would be able to forget, they were staring at each other so intensely that it wouldn't be a surprise if the tension could be felt in the air, or even in the rooms surrounding them.

And a few motions of Lan Xichen's mouth later, the reactions of Jiang Cheng from his former climax repeated.. With two small changes to it: As his knot ripped, so did the sheets his left hand was clinging to, not so silently either,.. while his other hand pushed the taller males head all the way down on him, quite forcefully as well. Lan Xichen's body tensed, it wasn't that he couldn't have gotten himself free, but he endured it. He endured having the entirety of the younger Leader in his throat, his liquid filling his mouth to the point where some was running out and down the corners of his lips. Jiang Cheng was too tense for a while to let go, his situation close to having a whole body cramp,.. at the end, it would probably remain another secret of his, that it wasn't the sucking that made him cum, harder than ever before in his life.. but in reality, the sight of the wild god having him in his mouth - and every small detail about the scene around it.

Once the tension had subsided enough, Jiang Cheng let go. He was still panting like he had run a marathon, his face so red, yet all of his muscles seemed to have relaxed. However, the further down he came from the high and aftermath, the louder the "Oh fuck" in his mind got. He couldn't even look at Lan Xichen directly, glancing at him from the corners of his eyes, while letting go of the ripped sheet in a bit of a hurry. What was one supposed to do in a situation like that? He really didn't know. Looking at the sheet and then on his lower stomach where everything was a mess.. the only thing that embarrassed him more was that his length didn't retire even one bit. Once again, his mouth opened and closed minimally a few times, yet the movements of the older one caused him to look over. After a second of being stunned by the view of the wild god kneeling between his legs, while running his hand over his mouth and chin to wipe away the lust of his.. It then finally made click in Jiang Cheng's mind.

,,Wait.. You didn't...-"


	18. XiCheng 15

,,Wait.. You didn't...-"

The clear shock within the younger ones words, the embarrassment that re-echoed in his tone and how visible both was in his expression.. Lan Xichen couldn't suppress a natural reaction that usually would've never been witnessed from him. His brows raised, a smirk appeared at the corners of his lips. There was no instant reply coming from him, yet after running his hand through his hair once, he changed his position so that he was once more hovering over Jiang Cheng who still had himself propped up - now on both of his elbows. The older one didn't lean in for a kiss, instead he proceeded to whisper in his lovers ear in such a teasing seductive tone.

,,I didn't do what?"

It wasn't like him to be overly provocative, but the answer to the smaller leaders question was actually so evident that he couldn't help it. Jiang Cheng, however, felt his jaw drop, there was a foreign rush of panic coming over him that was also audible once he spoke up.

,,Why did you do that, you freaking idiot? Isn't that against everything your damned sect stands for?"

This time, Lan Xichen couldn't suppress his laughter anymore. It was honest and made his entire body shake, he even ended up leaning his forehead against the others shoulder for a few moments. Once he could stop himself, he let out a long breath before looking up. His gaze met the younger ones, yet while just mentioned one was still - for once - acting like a young guy during his first time, Lan Xichen could neither hide his amusement - nor the slight provocative streak he had learned to suppress.

,,If you think about it for a moment, young master Jiang.. I didn't really have much of a choice with the way you held me down, did I? I doubt it would've ended well if I would've choked while tending to you in such a place."

,,You really know no shame, do you?"

,,What is there to be ashamed about? If I would be a woman, would you think the same way? Or if someone would swallow their own blood because of a injury, would that be the same as well?"

At this point Jiang Cheng couldn't find words to keep arguing anymore. They both knew though that it wasn't because his seed got swallowed but more.. the person that did it was the person that did it.

Once he had won, Lan Xichen smiled softly and rubbed his nose against the others. With the agitation over what had just happened, he didn't dare to lean in for a kiss just in case the smaller man was really that "disgusted". For a moment there was hesitation visible in Jiang Chengs way of reacting, yet he regardless did end up leaning in for a kiss himself.

It took a while for them both to get clearer in their minds again. They were back at their soft, gentle way of kissing again for minutes at this point when..

The older one of them broke the kiss, he had been so high up in the pleasure heaven of giving the other his relief that he had entirely forgotten about himself. Jiang Cheng felt confused, the sudden change of atmosphere was something he couldn't wrap his head around. They had just been getting lost in this sweet tongue tango, but now Lan Xichen was resting his forehead on his chest. The Jades entire body language was off, the hands on either side of the naked ones head were tugging at the sheets, muscles tense enough to be visible.

Soon after, Lan Xichens right hand moved and disappeared in between of them. Jiang Cheng's brows had narrowed, even though they had been close for a while, the older man had - intentionally or not - always made sure their most distinct gender features weren't touching. Probably to not scare him away. There was worry starting to form in the naked males chest,.. but it would once again make click in his mind about how dumb and slow he sometimes was.

Jiang Cheng turned his head slightly, carefully, so it wouldn't be too noticeable and took a glance downwards, to where the others hand had disappeared. He couldn't see too much, but what he saw was between shocking and painful. Lan Xichen's hand was clearly making the motions of tending to oneself, yet his length - as far as Jiang Cheng could see - was in a terrible condition. The skin looked as if it was ready to burst from the swelling, the color making it clear that the veins must be popping out by now. Seeing that, he couldn't decide if he was more mad at himself for being so much of a spoiled brat that he hadn't thought about the other at all.. or if he was more mad at Lan Xichen for holding this entire speech before and now he wasn't even allowing himself to let out a single moan. As he spoke up, his tone sounded a bit too harsh, or more upset, than he had intended.

,,What are you doing there?"

As he heard those words, Lan Xichen snapped out of his little situation. He hadn't even realised that he began to tend to the part of his body that was aching for relief,.. nor had he intended to make Jiang Cheng mad, or how he thought - uncomfortable. He wanted the opposite initially, which was why he had remained silent about his own pain. But now, his hand stopped immediately and went back beside the younger ones head, he needed a moment before he could lift his head to look at the other. His expression was between pained & apologetic, just like the tone in which he spoke.

,,I apologise.. I didn't want to-"

,,I didn't ask for an apology, I asked you what you were doing."

,,I.." This time Lan Xichen didn't get what the actual problem or point of the other was. He couldn't get himself to say out loud either that he was in the process of jerking himself off.

,,Weren't you the one who held an entire speech about equal treatment in bed and not wanting to put your lover in a position you wouldn't want to be in yourself and what not all, just minutes ago?"

The older man was dumbfounded, even though he had at first kept his gaze on Jiang Cheng's.. Now that he felt told off, he averted it to a point on the others chest. However, Jiang Cheng continued in the tone from when he first spoke up, while Lan Xichen's the more he heard, the quieter his got.

,,You held that speech. Now tell me, would you keep your lover in such a state and feel good with yourself?"

,,... No..."

,,Then why are you doing it? It's one thing if you want to do it yourself, but then stop the freaking self-restraint." Jiang Cheng paused for a moment, he was mad, but there was also some worry within him. After letting out a heavy breath he continued in a slightly more gentle tone.

,,It hurts, doesn't it?"

All Lan Xichen could do at this point was nod. It hurt, badly, and by then it went worse each minute.

,,How does IT work?" The younger sect leader didn't even realise at this point what he was saying. The emotions within him were all over the place.. there were lust, worry, want, anger, all combining until he asked without even thinking about it how "all the way" would work.

,,.." Lan Xichen couldn't reply straight away, his painful problem had betrayed him and twitched quite hard once his mind had processed what the other had asked about. For a bit he looked at the smaller one of them with a shocked expression, while his eyes scanned to see if he was actually serious. However, the voice in his mind brought the excited one back to his senses, looking down Lan Xichen spoke up in both defeat and shame.

,,I know how to, technically.. but right now... I wouldn't be able to do it in a way that I wouldn't regret later... I'd more than likely hurt either, if not both of us."

Jiang Cheng's eyes widened for a moment, not even in shock but more respect towards the older one's honest confession. If it would've been the other way around, he didn't know if he'd have been able to resist the invitation even knowing what could go wrong. There was a short break before he spoke up in the more gentle yet determined tone.

,,Sit up."


	19. XiCheng 16

Lan Xichen looked at the other with a confused expression.. However, the look he got from Jiang Cheng made two things clear: Don't ask. Don't talk.

For a few seconds Lan Xichen hesitated before he moved out from between the others legs. He remained in a position where he was facing Jiang Cheng, while his legs spread out. With his hands supporting him on both sides of his body, the wild hair, the robe over his shoulders.. accompanied from his toned muscles and throbbing length that stood upright.. The only thing that made this scene that tad more unforgettable and arousing was the look in his eyes that was a mixture of begging, arousal, confusion and pain.

By now it was impossible to say which of them was the masochist and the sadist, they seemed to have each their little streak of both secretly.

Jiang Cheng's length twitched once, but he ignored it. After saving the picture in his mind, he made his move. Sitting up himself, he crawled over to the taller one that sat there so obediently that he had to tease him a little at least. Jiang Cheng brushed his lips a few times over Lan Xichens, but never actually went for a kiss, there was a smirk playing on his lips. The hand that had Zidian on it was trailing over the taller mans chest, his finely toned abdomen. Slowly, Jiang Cheng began to realise the thrill his lover had gotten, the past hour or so - from nothing but pleasing him. The way the needy ones breath went heavier, how his muscles twitched and how he shivered as the coldness of Zidian met his overheated skin.. it was perfect.

At the end Lan Xichen never got the kiss that he was so desperate for, instead.. Jiang Cheng leaned in to his ear, his own nature was taking the lead at this point, before lightly sucking and nibbling on it. He wasn't as gentle, nor slow, as the other had been.. but he really was by far not as roughless and brutal as Lan Wangji. Apart from that, he would've gladly taken his time, but he was a man himself and that problem of the taller one of them made him feel all sorts of pain as well. With that being said, Jiang Cheng proceeded to make his way down on the others neck, doing the same that had been done to him in the process: sucking, nibbling,.. each way one could tend to anothers skin.

There was a difference though between them, while the younger man had shown quite the reaction around his breast and nipple area, which he hoped no one would ever find out afterwards,.. Lan Xichen in turn reacted quite strongly when he was getting teased around the ear and neck area, especially at a few certain spots. However, as much as Jiang Cheng enjoyed hearing those soft moans from the other, he didn't spend too much time on it - for now. After the neck, came the chest and while tending to that he rather sneakily ripped the band aif off for both of them, as he wrapped his hand around Lan Xichen's length. There was a soft, surprised breath escaping from the older one, yet his lover had the same error in his mind as he had had earlier: It was a length and it wasn't his, but he somehow naturally treated it as his own - it was a familiar yet unfamiliar feeling.

Jiang Cheng's grip was different, tighter, just a different type of intense from what the older male was used to. Thinking back to it later, Lan Xichen would come to realise that Jiang Cheng was just as eager to milk the pain out of his system, as he had been - but in his own way. The strokes and flicks over the glans were more eager for the end result, rather than the journey needed for it. Lan Xichen tried to, but within seconds of the other tending to him his lips parted, his head fell to the side and backwards a little, as he tugged on the sheets, while the sounds that escaped from him quickly won in both - intensity and pleasure.

,,Not so rough.. please.." As good as he felt, Lan Xichen needed to speak up, as the grip around his aching cock tightened further. Due to how swollen he was, the rough tour did start to be rather uncomfortable sooner or later, especially due to Zidian.

Jiang Cheng had been, like the other before, lost in being the giving part.. It wasn't until he heard the breathless, weak voice of the older one, with a faint hint of pain in it, that he looked up. He had been engrossed in tending to both the neck and length of his lover, his eyes clouded as he paused in what he was doing to speak up in a bit of a surprised slightly worried tone himself.

,,What's wrong?"

,,..." Lan Xichen felt a bit embarrassed, he avoided the others gaze and needed a moment before he could actually say more.. yet as he did, it then also made click for Jiang Cheng, who ended up speaking a lot of gibberish after it did make click.

,,Zidian.. I'm quite sensitive at the moment.. and.."

,,Oh.. shit... sorry.. I grew so used to wearing him all the time, that I forget even wearing him. I forgot wearing him once when I was quite young and tried to get myself off. Didn't feel too great, even hurt myself in the process..-"

Watching the nervous virgin switch turn back on, Lan Xichen had to bite on his lower lip, but as the trailing off of the younger one went even more into the extremely private topic direction.. He burst out laughing, which in turn made his entire face light up. The frowning look that Jiang Cheng showed in response made none of it any less hilarious, even though the older one wasn't making fun of him. After letting out a last heavy long breath and clearing his throat Lan Xichen explained in a apologetic yet sweet tone.

,,I apologise, I wasn't laughing at you.. You just started to trail off and you looked so adorable when doing so, I couldn't help it."

,,Ado-" Jiang Cheng couldn't believe what he had just heard, his tone was pure disbelief and shock with his voice raised. If his natural tone wouldn't be more on the deep side or if he'd be a girl it would've probably been a screech.

,,Mmh, yes. Adorable." Drunk Lan Xichen grinned as he repeated his words, with no shame in sight. He hadn't been trying to provoke his lover, but somehow, it always ended up appearing or sounding that way.

Jiang Cheng glared, within seconds switching his position so that he was hovering over the others body. The kiss he initiated was a rough one, yet at the end they both moaned into one anothers mouth. It was so sudden and agressive that the older man was both speechless and wide eyed, especially as Jiang Cheng pulled away but not without biting on the others lower lip. He looked so hot and wild in this moment that Lan Xichen could feel himself swallow and his heart skip a beat,.. which repeated as Jiang Cheng spoke up in a provocative, slightly dominating tone that went straight down to the Jades length.

,,You really should stop provoking me, Huan..~"


	20. XiCheng 17

,,Huan"

.. It was the first time in his life that a stranger not only called him by his first name, his birth name, but also without any type of honorific. Over all, his birth name wasn't getting used often anymore.. Lan Xichen couldn't even explain how he felt about it, especially in his setting and with the way they had just kissed.. just with everything combining.

Jiang Cheng loved how puzzled the taller man looked, it could've ended badly as well.. but somehow, he had known that it would lead more than likely to Lan Xichen being so gone out for a while that he could move freely. Which was what he did, using his chance the younger leader slid down. With his lips hovering over the aching, painful looking cock of the Jade, he smirked while staring into his eyes and spoke up once more in the same tone.

,,I'm sorry for having forgotten about Zidian before, Huan.. but tell me.. How badly are you aching for relief at this point, Huan?"

The wild god was a complete mess inside, hearing his name like that and so often.. it made him feel so overly naked, it was far more intimate than anything he was used to. This time his mouth opened and closed without a word coming out, the others breath was tickling him on his most private parts while his voice that re-echoed in Lan Xichen's mind kept stimulating him on the inside.

,,Come on, Huan.. You even tried to jerk yourself off in front of me, because you were aching for relief so badly.. but now you can't say a word?"

Even though Jiang Cheng kept the act going, he wasn't really intending to be overly sadistic. He had been in the cloud recesses for way longer than Wei Wuxian and knew that he could probably keep bringing the other to the edge and leave him hanging for a few hours and he wouldn't actually be able to say those words out loud. Seeing the inner conflict that was visible in the others eyes, he had his confirmation for 2 things. 1: The self-restraint rule was really something that needed to change & 2: If he really wanted to know how to have the "all the way" with a man, he'd either need to read a book or get laid himself - which he had already guessed, or expected, by the way the taller one had responded earlier.

,,It's alright,.. you don't need to go that far." Even though he was about to die from the urge to release, at this point in time Lan Xichen couldn't yet get himself to say what the other wanted to hear. He felt a bit like a hypocrite because of it, hadn't he previously told Jiang Cheng off for not saying what he actually wanted?

"Going that far" Jiang Cheng mentally rolled his eyes, not only did he also feel like the other was quite the hypocrite, he knew that right now they both wanted to go way further than what they had done until then. Knowing that it would lead nowhere, instead of saying another word, he kept his eyes fixed on the taller male while running the tip of his tongue over the others glans. The reaction was a clear one, the others eyes widened in surprise, yet his length twitched and he had to bite on his lower lip to suppress a noise that would've been something between pleasure and "what is this".

Jiang Cheng was glad that he wasn't the only one who felt conflicted about the first blowjob sensations. It felt great, yet strange. He had sometimes fantasised about how it would feel when reading porn books, so he also knew enough of what the woman was supposed to do and what not to perform himself. Thinking wouldn't lead anywhere, at the rate they were going he would be painfully erect within no time himself and it would all just be a mess. Closing his eyes, he took the length in his hand, it was just like Lan Wangji's an enormous one, big enough to still peak out of his grip halfway. After that he hesitated,.. Did he really want to do it? Suck another man?

,,It's alright. I'll go and do it my-"

Lan Xichen's words were cut off, he didn't know that Jiang Cheng was already 90% there and that him going back on his entire speech once again would actually cause the other to take him into his mouth. As he looked down, he met his lovers stare that was a clear "I dare you" one,.. Having been the first to get sucked off, Jiang Cheng knew more than the currently receiving one did. His lips were wrapped around Lan Xichen a bit tighter, he was using his hand more and concenrated his sucks on the upper half, or upper third, of the length. At this point, the memory of what the Jade had said popped up in the younger mans mind about "only knowing/understanding when you experienced it" and all of that. He couldn't deny the truth behind those words - now that he had a reference for himself.

What surprised Jiang Cheng the most though was that, the longer he kept on working his unskilled magic the louder his lover got. Neither of them was experienced enough yet to have the routine burned deep enough into their minds to concentrate a lot on anything but the task in hand or mouth but.. "still waters truly run deep" was definitely a thing that popped up in his mind. Lan Xichen was turning into a moaning mess, his breathing even worse than the younger ones had been and the sheets were torn long before he released even once. For a while they both kept glancing at one another, yet the tighter his knot got the harder it was for the wild god to keep his eyes open until he really couldn't stop his lids from falling shut anymore. Only a few minutes later Lan Xichen tensed up, he was about to warn the younger one but the last lick over his glans resulted in him letting out a deep loud, choked curse as he opened his mouth instead. It was the last motion he needed to finally drive over the edge, his head fell back, cock twitching like mad as he released a load enough for two.

Having felt the tension of the others muscles, Jiang Cheng had been torn between pulling away or not,.. However, hearing the sudden curse shocked him so much that, before he snapped out of it, the thick liquid was already filling his mouth and running down his throat, as well as at the sides of his mouth - down the others length and his own hand. At the end, his natural reflex had caused him to swallow most of the first amount that got spilled before he pulled away and started coughing, yet regardless of that his hand naturally kept pumping out the remaining bits of liquid from Lan Xichen's length. It only drang through to him short before the climax was over, that the other had made the faintest of thrusting motions into his grip. For a moment, curiosity got the best of the naked man, he stroked a few times more while coming down from his coughing fit. As he let go, he was both speechless because of many things, but also staring at his lovers face that looked so relieved and relaxed, even a soft smile was playing on his lips.

"He looks even more handsome and mesmerising" That was what Jiang Cheng was thinking, as he used the chance of the other coming down from his high with his eyes closed to simply stare at him in pure awe. For a while neither of them moved, or said a word, they were both spaced out in their own ways, realising things in their own worlds,.. The first to move was the Jade, he opened his eyes and let out such a heavy, relieved breath that his cheeks went a dark shade of pink. At the end he looked up, just to see the way the younger man stared at him. They were each in their own way quite a sight, Jiang Cheng with the remaining bits of cum on the corners of his lips while the tiniest amount of sweat was visible on Lan Xichen's forehead with the gentlest most grateful kind of smiles playing on his lips.


	21. XiCheng 18

,,What? Do I have something on my face?"

It was a little ironic that Jiang Cheng was the one asking this question, since he had been the one caught staring at the older one and, apart from that, he did actually have something on his face that didn't belong there. However, as the wild god chuckled in response, his tsundere side came back out and he threw a glare at him.

,,To be completely honest, yes you have."

Lan Xichen replied, in a amused yet slightly seductive and sweet tone, without his smile fading at all. He then moved so that he was kneeling in front of the other and repeated what he had done once before: rubbing his nose lightly against Jiang Cheng's to test out whether or not a kiss would be fine - after a moment of playing hard to get, the tsundere then tilted his head.. However, instead of going for a kiss right away, Lan Xichen used the tip of his tongue to remove his own mess - at least from one corner of the others mouth. Before any protest could be made, he then flipped them back over in their initial position, of him being both in between of the others legs and hovering on top of him. Jiang Cheng didn't look too pleased, but strangely enough, the Jade was slowly getting used to the routine. After letting his guard down, the guard would come back up for a while, then down again and so forth.

,,And, was it that hard to survive?" It probably shouldn't be that way, but Lan Xichen found a weird sense of amusement in teasing the one that usually always acted so tough.. especially with something that he'd expect a women to do during sex, without thinking about it twice. It got even better each time Jiang Cheng reacted with his sarcastic and pissed "so funny" expression - like he did right now.

,,And, was it that hard to not go back on your words about lovers roles and what not all, Huan?" Jiang Cheng replied in a dry tone that matched his expression. While the older one hadn't expected to get such a backfire, he still had to press his lips together to suppress another laugh.

,,You really find yourself so amusing and great when you're drunk, don't you?" The Jiang Sect leader really didn't seem to get the game they were playing of throwing the ball back and forth, but honestly Lan Xichen gladly played along.

,,No, it's just that in contrast to how you usually act you're rather amusing and adorable in bed." It was somewhat shocking to the wild god himself what he said this time, so straightforward, and to top it off: while staring into the others eyes. Just as he had guessed, the reaction of Jiang Cheng was immensely hilarious, his facial muscles distorted in all sorts of ways within seconds. The younger one clearly felt so many different things at once, that his brain must've run haywire. Shock, disgust, embarrassment, rage, were only a few that the Jade could make out.

,,You.. You fucking idiot! Fuck off, go to your own room and, for goodness sake, please die a painful death on your way!" Jiang Cheng wanted to fight back with all his might, yet honestly.. his voice was just as much of a mess as his face, when it came to the way the sound of it changed. If he'd have known that it would only cause his lover to slam another one on top of all the teasing from before, he would've rather shut up.

Lan Xichen was simply letting the other rant for a moment. After having it, he leaned in to the younger males ear, what just mentioned one wasn't able to see was that a smirk had formed on his lips. His tone was such a seductive, sweet and honest whisper, if directed at anyone else.. the person might either faint, melt or cum on the spot.

,,My my.. You don't really mean that do you..? A-Cheng.. thank you. It's the first time, since a long time, that I've felt so good within my own skin. I haven't laughed in a long time either.. nor did anyone ever please me the way you did. Thank you, A-Cheng."

The Jade didn't expect a reply, or if, then not a good one.. He just felt like he had to say it, not just for the teasing that made the other do all sorts of funny expressions. And he didn't get a reply, there was no movement coming from Jiang Cheng - even as he nuzzled his head against the others neck. Lan Xichen kept doing so for a few seconds, then he looked back up and let their gazes meet. Like before, the taller male wore that genuine, satisfied and sweet smile, while the trundere's jaw had dropped.

Jiang Cheng had expected a lot, but not words like those in response to his mean ones, nor that his heart would go places because of them. Just like the other, hearing his first name in such a way, touched him in places he hadn't thought were still alive, for almost a century at this point. He too felt naked, weirdly embraced, yet.. maybe safe.. maybe safe was the correct word, if he'd admit it or not.

They both felt a strange warmth inside of them, something neither of them had experienced so far. For a while, they both remained still, before the younger ones old habit of opening and closing his mouth retured. However, this time, just in case it would be the wrong words he'd say again, Lan Xichen decided to let their bodies talk for themselves. Feeling the older ones tongue run over his lips, then dance along his - while the initiator of the new tongue dance felt the others soon join. It was again, a slow kiss, a ever so long lasting one, where both of their tastes combined. Full of want for something else other than the harshness of the world, or purely sex alone - not that they didn't want that, it would get clearer soon again how much they actually did.. but for a while, a longer while, they got lost in experiencing the sweet sides of life.. And oh, how much they loved it.


	22. XiCheng 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From here a more or less NSFW break starts, just so it doesn't get too much at once. It won't be entirely free of NSFW but more talk & no actions - not for too long though, the fun will continue.

They only broke the kiss after it kept going for so long that they needed to end it to catch some air. At this point, it was unclear which of them wanted to make the other keep their words to themselves more.. even though it was probably more the case for Jiang Cheng. Just mentioned one wasn't able to move too much, he was trapped underneath the taller one and really didn't feel like begging, so he went about closing his eyes and acting as if the other was none existent.

It was again, rather amusing, yet Lan Xichen retreated on his own - with a small idea in the back of his head. He remembered the robe incident from before and simply wanted to see if his guess was correct. Once he got up from the bed, he stretched and acted as if he was about to take the robe off,.. like he thought, Jiang Cheng spoke up, in a slightly husky sounding tone.

,,What are you doing?"

,,It's called getting undressed, if I remember correctly." Lan Xichen needed to use most of his concentration on not making his amusement audible.

,,Not being undressed wasn't a problem until now, was it."

,,I would need to get undressed either way, since you already told me to leave, remember?"

,,..." Jiang Cheng was too wrongly prideful to say he neither wanted the other to leave, nor take the robe off. He did, however, let out a breath that sounded rather displeased.

,,If you don't want me to leave, or keep the robe on, you can just say so."

,,Says the one that didn't reply to most of my questions, because of his sects rules - hypocrite."

If anyone who didn't know them would hear their bickering, they'd probably think it was a years long married couple having a rough moment.

,,There's a difference between saying something like "Could you keep the robe on" and talking about what I did."

,,..... Keep it on, don't.. Why would I fucking care?!" Jiang Cheng, backed in a corner, was once again back in his agitated Tsundere mode.

At this point, when the younger one raised his voice, Lan Xichen turned. He then proceeded to stand beside the bed, leaning over so he was once again above the other - without actually climbing up on the bed. There was a smirk playing on his lips, as he stared directly into the younger Leaders eyes while saying his next words in a tone that made it clear that he hadn't needed a reply right from the start, because he had looked right through Jiang Cheng.

,,Do you enjoy seeing me in the color of your sect that much?"

,,Bullshit!" Even though the naked ones tone was a desperate try to cover it up, the way he instantly had to look away was enough confirmation for the tall man.

,,I won't take it off then."

As if nothing had happened, Lan Xichen walked around the bed and layed down beside the other. He was far away from having calmed down, yet he also didn't expect anything more from their time together. The Jade was the first to break the minute long silence again, his tone calm, a bit more serious, as he stared at the ceiling.

,,It might not be my place to say so.. but I think Young Master Jin really wanted to.. play with you in the snow. Maybe there is another reason, but I don't want to talk about my guesses, or theories now. It's actually not a bad way to pass time, building something with snow."

,,You make it sound as if that horrible thing that was in front of you was your first ever snowman." Even though he had been far longer in the Cloud Recesses than his former brother, he didn't recall all the rules that pretty much prohibited all kinds of fun in a child's life - until his words were already said.

,,...."

The sudden silence of the one that had been previously leading most of their conversations caused Jiang Cheng to glance over. Lan Xichen was laying on his back, staring at the ceiling, yet somehow.. he wasn't as full of expression and life anymore, almost looking as if he was actually hurt. As slow as Jiang Cheng was, he actually ended up stabbing the other right into the chest once again after turning on the side, in almost a shocked manner. His position was being propped up on one elbow, so that he could look at the others face.

,,Don't tell me it actually was your first snowman?"

,,...."

For a moment Jiang Cheng could swear that the Jade glared at him. It took a few seconds longer for him to recall that the older Lan brother was rather artistic, which made the double questioning of his skill even worse. Playing with the mess of a sheet they had created in his free hand, the younger male was slightly desperately trying to find something to change the topic with in his mind.. but his socialising skills were around as great as Lan Wangji's, so he could for fuck not come up with anything.

,,It is my first."

Literally anyone other than Jiang Cheng would've realised at this moment in time, from the clear way of wording it, and the intense gaze Lan Xichen was giving him.. that he wasn't only, or at all, referring to the snowman.. However, it was the younger Sect Leader, so he of course didn't notice what weight the words had and after letting out a awkward noise he let out a quick barely audible.

,,Sorry.. It's not that bad for a first."

There was a bit of silence between them again, yet just as the younger male took a deep breath to ask something else.. they both flinched, there was a loud pained, yet strangely pleasured scream re-echoing through the by now almost dead silent residence of the Nie Sect. Jiang Cheng was especially startled, because he recognised the voice and his body automatically moved, regardless of how their relationship was nowadays.

,,Oh fuck.. Lan Zhan.. not so hard... Er-gege.."

All the color that had previously been present on Jiang Cheng's face faded at once. He knew perfectly well that no one would dare to put him and Wei Wuxian into close enough rooms for him to be able to hear something like that, yet they heard it almost as if the other two were in the same room. Not even the fact that Lan Xichen cleared his throat and spoke up, in a tone as if nothing had happened, just seconds later really got him to rip out of his stare in the direction the scream had come from.

,,What were you going to say just now?"

,,.. I... Is that normal...?"

,,Between them..? I'm afraid that I have to say: Yes it is."

,,... But that.. that's not really normal, is it?"

,,If you mean generally speaking, no it isn't. If you are asking if it is morally correct what they do, I am unsure. I would never treat my other half this way,.. yet no matter how long they are together, they don't change. They even moved their home by now to a outer line of the Cloud Recesses because.. well, I assume that you remember how silent it usually is at night, in the Cloud Recesses."

,,.. Did you.."

,,I tried going in between once, when it sounded around the way it did right now.. but shockingly enough, Young Master Wei threw something at me and I let them be."

,,That sounds almost as if-"

,,As if they are each in their own way punishing him for his past life's actions? My uncle and I already had this conversation once. We had the same thoughts, yet as long as it is what they both want.. there's no real way to end it. If you would live within the Cloud Recesses, you would be used to it by now. For your own sake, try to blend out the noise.. and also the bruises you'll see on Young Master Wei later on."

Lan Xichen had continued to talk in a neutral, calm tone while finishing Jiang Cheng's spaced out sounding sentences and questions. It wasn't until he mentioned the word "bruises" that the younger one ended up looking at him.

After a few minutes of coming to terms with it, Jiang Cheng laid back down, only to hear the Jade repeat his question from before, in a more interested tone.

,,So.. You wanted to say something before we got interrupted?"


	23. XiCheng 20

Jiang Cheng blinked, he was still somewhat gone out and only made a sound after a while that was similar to a "Mh?".

,,Before young master Wei.. interrupted you, you were about to say something. What was it?"

The only thing more shocking than the scream of his former brother, was really that the older one of them could just continue with everything else, as if it was normal. After a moment of hesitation, Jiang Cheng then spoke up in a rather low tone, that made it audible he was just like Lan Wangji towards him - holding negative emotions the other way around.

,,Could I ask you something else first?"

,,Please, go ahead."

,,... The bruising you mentioned, what is it about?"

This time, Lan Xichen was the one to hesitate. After a bit he let out a soft breath, putting on his gentle smile while his voice sounded a bit.. embarrassed, but it wasn't 100% that, there was a hint of being heavy-hearted lingering as well.

,,As I previously said, the self-restraint rule and strict way of raising appears to be the right choice, but only in theory. As you know, our level in cultivation has been extremely high, since a young age.. But it isn't only our cultivational strength that is on such a level.. Both of us brothers can easily bring down trees with our bare hands. It is usually alright, but the more agitated or in a state where our natural urges.. whether it be rage, or in this case.. lust, take over,.. It has never escalated further than bruising, but again,.. the more you restrain yourself, the less you will be able to in certain situations in life."

Jiang Cheng was trapped in a state of disbelief. He naturally ended up recalling how even in his agitated and overly aroused state the older one of them.. He had gotten treated so gently from the others hands.. that could bring down a tree? It didn't add up, or make sense to him at all. It wasn't much else when he thought about Lan Wangji, they had never been on overly good terms, especially since Wei Wuxian was reborn.. but regardless of the clear strength the younger Jade had, Jiang Cheng had always thought that he had to make up lacking physical strength, or something like that, with his high cultivational level.

Lan Xichen had meanwhile turned himself so he was laying a bit more on his side, facing Jiang Cheng. He could clearly see that the other was lost in thought, which wasn't really a bad thing, because it gave him a chance to take in the others features, when they for once were neither showing pleasure, nor anger. His own eyes had a shine to them, a smile played on his lips.. The younger male looked for once actually like that: Young, confused,.. Letting out another soft, almost content breath, he spoke up again in a soft tone with his heavy Gusu dialect still present.

,,You still didn't tell me what you wanted to say, A-Cheng."

Once he heard his name, the one born in Yunmeng snapped out of it. He looked at the taller one with a neutral expression.. before a smirk appeared on the corners of his lips and something almost dark, or mischievous flickered in his eyes.

,,I simply wanted to ask you, how it was possible for you to already be in such a state after a simple kiss. Are you that sensitive, or did you do something rather inappropriate for your Sect, behind my back?"

It was the first time in his life that Lan Xichen choked because of another person's words. He had to cover his mouth with his hand and looked away while letting the wave subside.. After that he went silent, before saying in a slightly raspy tone, caused from the coughing, with some nervousness playing on his handsome facial features.

,,Inappropriate..?"

Seeing and hearing all those reactions from the wild god, Jiang Cheng began to feel himself again. His sadistic streak was getting the best of him, even to the point where he ignored that he had taken quite a few steps in the cut-sleeve world, and didn't show much shame when talking.

,,Inappropriate as in touching yourself below the belt. Getting yourself off behind someone elses back while making it look like you're worried about their physical health."

,,...... I.. That... I wouldn't do that.."

,,You wouldn't?"

Jiang Cheng couldn't help but chuckle rather sadistically, and darkly. He had backed the elder in a corner.. and it was gold, how Lan Xichen's expression showed and his voice made audible how shaken up he was inside. As his chuckle made the other look at him in shock, he threw another load on top while staring into the Jades dark eyes.

,,If I remeber correctly you were just trying to get yourself off on top of me secretly a few minutes ago. So,.. If you weren't doing that behind my back, what were you doing, Huan?"

While something inside of Jiang Cheng was expecting the taller one of them to get up, go and hide - Lan Xichen felt something inside of him want to do just that. At the end, the one that was still dressed in the colors of the Jiang Sect did end up turning away. He turned himself once around so his back was towards the younger man and it was clear to both of them that he was trying to run, in some way at least.


	24. XiCheng 21

Jiang Cheng's aura darkened, as he slid further into his sadistic side. Call it a bit of a payback, after having been backed into a corner so often from the other. Without saying a word, he closed the gap between them, it was only for a brief second but he could swear the Jade tensed and that his breathing had paused, once their bodies were only millimetres apart. Jiang Cheng pusposefully didn't make another move for some seconds, he was back in his on one elbow, sideways propped up position and had for the first time quite a good view on Lan Xichen's from the robe covered back. His nape was half covered from his long, untamed hair, yet his ear wasn't. Smirking to himself, the younger one of them leaned in to it, while the fingertips of his free hand trailed a line ever so lightly over the others from the movements exposed side. His way of speaking was dark and sadistic, like his expression, yet he whispered each word.

,,Was what you did behind my back so much worse, than to jerk yourself off, that you have to run away? You don't really think that that would work after all you did, do you?"

Lan Xichen didn't reply, his breathing was soft, yet somehow a little unstable. His eyes went from closed, to opened widely and then to closed again - he was between shocked and trying to compose himself.

,,No answer? Isn't that rather rude? Then let me ask you another question. How badly did you want to get yourself off just a few minutes ago?"

Jiang Cheng saw out of the corner of his eyes that the hand the other wasn't laying on had lightly began to tug on the sheets underneath it. At this point, he wasn't too sure if he was about to make the other mad or not..

The truth however was, that.. Remembering both, the imagination he had that caused him to be rather lively below the belt before they had even kissed.. combining with knowing what he did now about sex and how badly he had ached for relief.. Let's just say that Lan Xichen was starting to feel more and more hot again. It wasn't like him, but he truly ached to let out more than his usual one time relief.

,,So rude, Huan. Then let me rephrase my first question. If you weren't getting yourself off behind my back,.. What caused you to get hard?"

There was a longer pause this time where Jiang Cheng could see from the way the others facial muscles moved that he was about to say something.. and the Jade did, after letting out a shaky long breath, in a tone that was a little tense.

,,When I touched your lower back,.. around the tailbone area.. The way you moved your head and held onto the door knob.."

Another moment of silence, Jiang Cheng had to recall and process what had been said. He didn't fully get the bigger picture and so he actually ended up laughing before saying in a rather humiliating tone.

,,You get it off to people holding a door knob? That's..."

,,Do you remember the restraint rule? You can put as much restraint on yourself, or someone else, as you want. We need our imagination as cultvatiors quite frequently to recall things, think of strategies and so forth, don't we? With that the restraint over our imagination is probably one of our weakest points."

Lan Xichen wasn't really pissed, but he did have somewhat enough of it all. It wasn't like him to interrupt someone elses speech, but he did anyway.. to Jiang Cheng's surprise. The latter blinked, thought and it made click.

,,So, you had dirty thoughts? What were you thinking?"

,,..."

If the dirty thoughts had went so far that Lan Xichen couldn't say a word.. Honestly Jiang Cheng couldn't suppress the urge to see how desperate, or far he could get the Jade, if he'd trigger that dirty mind of his. It had a strange thrill to it, that new game he had found for himself. His voice naturally went even lower, as if he knew what he was going, the sound of it was so heavily intoxicating. However, most of what he ended up saying was either what they had already done, or some things he knew from straight porn books.

,,Huan.. What were you thinking about..? Did you want to press me against the door, tease my neck and rub against me..? How far did you go in your mind..? Were you fantasizing about jerking me off..? Or how I would touch you..? What did you want to see or hear? How I moan and shiver because of you? Did you want to make me create a mess? Tell me, Huan.. How far did you go in your imagination? Did you try to think of how everything would feel and taste,.."

The situation was getting unbearable for the older one of them, before it had been a imagination with no real references.. Now however, he knew so much more. He knew, how the other could sound and look, how he felt and reacted. Even though they hadn't gone as far as he had imagined before they kissed, they had been so close to it. His formerly black and white and toneless little fantasy had now color, sound and scent. The Jades breathing went heavier. His mind kept going, even as the Jiang Sect leader had already stopped talking without him realising it. His eyelids were closed shut, teeth gritted, while the throbbing from below his belt kept getting stronger and stronger. The hand of his that had previously been tugging on the sheets, at some point began to move slowly closer to where he ached for attention.

Jiang Cheng was really enjoying himself. The reason for why he was doing what he did though.. "offiically" in his mind, he told himself that he just wanted to make Lan Xichen lose himself,.. the real point though, that he'd more than likely never admit out loud, was that after all he had heard when it came to what the restraint could actually do to a person.. a tiny part of him probably wanted the other to let go once. Just like the Jade wanted him to confront himself with his emotions. He also couldn't deny that the scene wasn't making him "feel things", if the roles would be reversed he'd probably shamelessly get himself off.. After all they had done, was jerking oneself off really that much worse? It didn't make sense to him at all. However, the struggle of Lan Xichen kept getting clearer, as the closer his hand got to that aching part of his, the longer it hesitated during the breaks where he tried to refrain from closing the gap.


	25. XiCheng 22

Jiang Cheng sooner or later started to feel rather complicated inside. The taller male had been dead silent and fighting with himself for minutes at this point.. and it honestly on one side amused him, on the other he felt bad, once he realised that it was more turning into torture than the game he had intended it to be. He was debating about what to do, should he go further with his words, get the other off himself,.. there were a lot of options, yet he somehow in between of all his spaced out thinking process and the trailing over the others soft skin.. ended up whispering something that he couldn't believe he actually wanted some sort of confirmation for, for himself.

,,Were you actually fantasizing about going all the way.. how it would feel inside of me.. while seeing that mess of a body I have..?"

Not only did Jiang Cheng's eyes widen as he realised what he had asked, while at the same time realising that it confirmed a guess the other had had.. Lan Xichen's eyes opened as well, for the first time in a long time. The younger ones hand had stopped the trailing as well - there was a different kind of sudden silence between them. Jiang Cheng had pretty much just opened up, in a whisper that was full of disbelief, that he couldn't understand how someone could feel, or think in such a way after - or more precisely - while seeing the state he was in. After a moment while the younger one this time was about to run, the Jade closed his eyes again and spoke in a low, somewhat gentle tone.

,,You don't think you're desirable, just because you have scars?"

,,Forget it."

Jiang Cheng replied so quick, his tsundere guard was back and he sat up quite in a hurry as well. He wanted to act like that right now never happened. If possible, forget that it actually did.. However, this time Lan Xichen wouldn't let him off that easily.

,,Is that why you have such a thick facade towards anyone you meet? Why you don't let anyone close, usually, to begin with? Because you think they'll turn once they see your life spread all over your chest and back?"

,,I told you to forget it, didn't I? For fuck's sake, shut up and stop acting like you know so much."

Lan Xichen closed his eyes again, he was completely calm when it came to the younger ones mood swings. It was between tragic and amusing that, Jiang Cheng whenever he tried to hide that something about him had been found out - or even confirmed from him himself - couldn't do anything but raise his voice and - or - try to silence the person he was confronted with. It was the same when he didn't want to hear something, or take something in.

,,To be completely honest-"

,,I told you to shut up, didn't I?"

,,A-Cheng. What are you afraid of hearing at this point that you're trying to silence me? Are you afraid of me saying "no" or are you afraid of what it would do with you if I would say the opposite?"

,,... fuck off!"

,,I won't. We already had the conversation that you won't always be able to run from your emotions like that.-"

,,Exactly what I want to hear from the hypocrite that can't even freaking admit that he wants to cum. Ridiculous."

,,One time you say you don't want to hear it, then you use me not saying anything against me. What do you want now?"

,,............."

It wasn't until that sentence that Jiang Cheng backed into his rage, tsundere corner realised that he wasn't really any less of a hypocrite with his words, than the Jade.. as well as, that he was acting like a gone mad toddler.

Lan Xichen left it for a while like that, with nothing but silence between them.. before he let out a soft breath. He wasn't really mad, but somewhat agitated himself at this point. However, whether it be a sadistic streak he secretly had or just to make a point, he spoke up again in a low tone, that was extremely honest and more and more shaky, as well as somewhat desperate the longer he spoke.

,,To be completely honest.. You weren't far from the truth with the guess you made about my imagination.. The way your breathing and heartbeat changed, your head dropped and how your hand clung to the door knob.. At the time I didn't know if I was even correct with my own guess about your arousal. The moment I pulled my hand away.. I had to.. because my mind was going places. If you think that you aren't desirable, because your past is written all over your body.. Simply from looking at your body move and imagining how else it could move.. how else you could sound and react.. That was really all that I needed to end up in such a state."

,,If.. If that would be the truth and you'd be so desperate for it, wouldn't you have already tried to get more? Or when I said all that shit, or even right now - wouldn't you jerk yourself off, or try to get it? I even invited you, but you turned me down. Stop talking bullshit, you can't even get yourself off to it and to cover it up you use your damn sect's rules."

Jiang Cheng's tries to talk back were actually making him lose face the more he said. Here and there he stumbled over his words, his own dialect coming out badly, yet he could neither stop himself from rambling on - nor from converting whatever he felt into nothing but rage. He wasn't mad, honestly the last bits Lan Xichen had said had made him feel overly strange inside, but what he felt was clearly not rage..

,,You might not be too wrong about me hiding behind my sects rules. I am honestly afraid that, if I wouldn't cling to them right now, if I would let go... You are talking like that, but what if I would actually end up trying to get what I want? Do you even want it? I already needed all my strength earlier to resist against your invitation.. Do you realise that, if I let myself drown in this imagination and reach the point of relief because of it - it will be even harder to refrain from wanting it in reality? You should know by now yourself that before our lips touched it was natural and easy to resist, but after.. Your body gave in regardless of what you were thinking, wasn't it?"


	26. XiCheng 23

Jiang Cheng's jaw dropped once again, he just kept talking and talking and pushing in all different directions without thinking at all. He couldn't deny most of the words the older one said.. without ever moving, in this calm and gentle tone, that again sounded somewhat pained. For a moment, a thought popped up into his mind, it was that he should really stay away from others. That by now he was too rotten to the core to bring anything good to anyone, unable to get fixed. What did he want? What was he supposed to do? Who was he even?

Neither of them spoke for a long time. While Lan Xichen was running things through his mind, Jiang Cheng did the same.

The younger one ran each moment they had spend together until now through his head. Realising after maybe minutes or seconds that really.. Until now, hadn't it all been pretty much about him? Each word the Jade had said was to somehow to help him, make him realise things,.. What had he done so far in return: apart from sucking it all up, humiliating the other and giving him a blowjob after the other had even made him cum twice? He had cursed at him, tried to throw him out, yelled at him,..

Thinking about it now, with how silent the older male was and after the teasing with the fantasy and all of that, who knew how pained he was after not even getting half the relief he had had? It weren't only the actions of Lan Xichen that popped up on the long list of people that he had treated like dirt, while they had given him so much more than he realised. Wei Wuxian, Wen Ning, Wen Qing, even the Lan & other sects had helped him out.. Even his own nephew was trying to help him while he was treating him like the worst piece of trash.. and that after all his sister and even her, now also long deceased, husband had done for him.

Trapped within his moment of realisation and the growing self-hatred he felt within him.. Jiang Cheng lifted his right hand and slapped himself once across the face. The impact was hard, loud and more than anything: Painful. It was the hand he was wearing Zidian on, which wasn't a coincidence.. because theoretically, he wasn't the only one who slapped himself awake.. theoretically his mother, father, sister, nephew, ancestors and he himself did at the same time.

Lan Xichen had been debating about if it would be better to leave - or not. He only stayed because he knew perfectly fine that more than likely now was his only chane to get Jiang Cheng to listen.. before he would eventually be thrown out and never looked at, or spoken to again. As happy as he was, he knew that the reality would be that whether or not they'd have gone all the way or fallen asleep side by side, the younger one probably had a new person to hate from the next morning on. It hurt, but good things have to come to an end more often than not, eventually. The Jade hadn't felt such an urge to curl himself up in a ball since a longer while, right now though - he really wanted to do so. "Wait another minute and then leave." Was what he thought, but before the countdown was over the loud noise within the room got him to flinch badly. Within a second Lan Xichen sat up and turned, just to see the younger ones hand linger in the air beside his cheek, where a cut had formed.

Lan Xichen was frozen in place, he didn't understand a thing at this point. He couldn't even react fast enough as Jiang Cheng's hand raised again, only to land and even stronger hit than before on his cheek. This time the younger one groaned because of the pain.

,,Stop it already!"

As the hand raised for a third time the Jade quickly got a hold of it and held the wrist almost too roughly for his usual self. His eyes were scanning the other, but only after calling his name thrice did Jiang Cheng visibly come back into the real world. His gaze was clouded and the wound on his face was bleeding worse than before.

,,For goodness sake, what are you doing? Are you trying to make it look like we had a altercation? If you want me to leave that badly, just say so!"

There was worry written all over Lan Xichen's face, so much of it audible in his voice that it was barely recognisable. To the elders surprise however, Jiang Cheng's formerly tense hand and wrist relaxed, just like his muscles over all, dropping his head he didn't even pull his arm away. The next the younger one did was.. chuckle, not the amused kind, more the done with oneself type.

Did he lose his senses? Should he try and slap the other himself? Honestly, the older male didn't know. He was staring at Jiang Cheng in worry, shock and disbelief. At the end just as he let go of the others wrist the smaller leader spoke up.. in a tone that was full of disgust towards oneself after realising how much shit you've done, the same kind that his chuckle had been.

,,I'm a complete and utter asshole, aren't I?"

,,Wh-.."

Lan Xichen couldn't even finish his words, either the other had gone insane or he had missed something, but the disbelief from before now turned into blank confusion. After a moment, since Jiang Cheng seemed to have lost his mind to the point where he didn't speak up again, the one dressed in the colors of the Lotus Pier Sect spoke up again himself, in a bit of a parental tone - the one typical for a parent with a kid that has gotten hurt or so but doesn't want to stop playing.

,,First of all, let us calm down and let me see your wound-"

The Jade paused in his words. Jiang Cheng had began to slowly shake his head, before he finally looked up. Even though there was blood running down on his cheek, down his jaw and neck,.. to Lan Xichen's shock there was a smile playing on the younger ones lips. It mirrored in his eyes as well - Jiang Cheng looked.. extremely peaceful, really as if he'd just woken up from some kind of hypnosis and it was also audible in his voice that sounded gentle and soft that something must've "snapped" inside of him.

,,No, it's okay... Actually... I think I would prefer, if that one turns into a scar."


	27. XiCheng 24

While before the younger ones entire behaviour had been as if he lost his mind.. the way Lan Xichen looked right now, was so helplessly gone out and confused that Jiang Cheng raised a brow. He was actually waiting for his "lover" to start screaming, ruffle his own hair like mad and run away at any second.

,,You look at me as if I've gone mad, while you look like you're about to go mad yourself, Huan."

Jiang Cheng chuckled softly, his tone a bit tired but at the same time rather amused and gentle.

,,I.. What.."

Not only was the older one of them unable to say a proper sentence, he couldn't think a straight one either. If it wasn't already worse enough, as he kept blinking a bit too often in a short amount of time, he felt something on his leg.. which, as he looked down, turned out to be the Jiang Sect leaders hand, rubbing it in a quite clumsy try of being comforting.

,,Well, I guess we both expected a lot but you probably didn't expect that right now.. and I didn't think I'd ever see you that gone out either. What did you say earlier.. It's quite.... adorable."

Lan Xichen had really expected anything and everything, sooner or later even that he'd find physical as well as emotional satisfaction at least to some extent that night... but the thing he never thought would happen, which also meant that it hit him out of nowhere, was that... Jiang Cheng would actually try to charm him - which he just did. The older one felt his face burn, his mouth open and close and at the end he actually had to look away, to try and somehow get his head to work again.

A few moments of silence passed between them, somehow.. the Jade didn't know if he wanted to say anything in case the other would snap back into his normal self, yet with a lot of hesitation being audible he spoke anyway.

,,What.. What happened?"

Jiang Cheng couldn't help but chuckle, speaking in the same tone as before.

,,That is.. a good question. I don't know how to explain it but,.. Already since quite early on, when you started to push and pull on my facade.. or comfort zone, realisations kept on coming to my mind. I tried to push them away though, honestly, thinking back right now - in this second - haven't I acted extremely dumb? I was fine, and I probably would've continued to be fine, if it wouldn't have been for.. the last argument we had, or more the last part you said. You were the one to slap me awake, I just did the rest.-"

Neither of the two could believe that the younger one was saying those words out loud. Especially the Jade didn't know what to make of it. Having heard only this far, there was a voice inside of him naturally telling him that it was some sort of game, even if it didn't feel like it from the others aura.

,,- I honestly kept pushing the thought on me the entire time, that you were just getting it off from the process of breaking me. That it's your thing. I kept going along because.. nature, I guess.. That's why I turned the game around just a few minutes ago, why I tried to break you myself. I felt both good and guilty during, if I'm completely honest. After that last portion of your speech though.. It was only then, that it actually sunk in that it was all about me. That you weren't trying to get anything for yourself at all from it.-"

Even though Lan Xichen had expected that Jiang Cheng would think he had some cruel intentions or so behind it all, actually hearing it confirmed did hurt. He wasn't that type of person, in reality.. He was actually always the one getting taken advantage of from others for their own pleasure, sake, or plans.

The taller one of them didn't know how visible it was how he felt. His expression even though Jiang Cheng could only take a glance at the side of his face clearly showed pain, his leg had also subconsciously moved away from the touch - which in turn caused the other to take his hand away. Staring down at Zidian, Jiang Cheng still continued.

,,When I realised what your true intentions were and how I had treated you the entire time.. Something inside of me got triggered. Before I could even finish the thought about why it felt so familiar.. Mom, dad, my sister, Wei Wuxian, Jin Zixuan, all the sects, Wen Ning, Wen Qing, even Jin Ling,.. all the people that I've treated the same way as you, because I see in everything nothing good, or think that there must be a reason behind it all, that isn't in my favour.. It just made click. Realising how much of an asshole I've been, for almost all of my life... If the injury I inflicted on myself right now, where I know, would turn into a scar.. I truly wouldn't mind it. There's a high chance that my current state of mind will have a hard time sustaining, after so many years of being a piece of shit of a person.. but a scar isn't that easy to ignore, things aren't as easy to forget when you have a scar related to the moment."

,,Are you making fun of me right now because it is quite widely known that I believe and trust a person easily and fully once they act nice and kind, no matter what they have done before?"

This time it was inside of Lan Xichen that something snapped. After letting out a bitter chuckle once the others speech was finished, he spoke up in a tone that made it audible that he was mad. It shocked the younger one to the point where he could now do nothing but stare at him in disbelief.


	28. XiCheng 25

Only a few moments, maybe minutes later, did Jiang Cheng try to reach out to the one that had visibly started to shake.. However, his hand that was about to reach for the older males chin got slapped away roughly. After that though, the agitated one looked up, he looked frightened - terribly frightened, to be more specific. Like Lan Xichen before, now Jiang Cheng felt an extreme wave of worry coming over him. He went through his speech again, but couldn't find for fuck where he had possibly gone wrong. Only when he recalled the incidents that he hadn't witnessed a lot from in the temple of secrets and added them together with what the Jade had said, did he realise.

It wasn't a well kept secret that Lan Xichen experienced something like a mental break in the temple, even if it wasn't too noticeable. Nor was it unknown that he had been in seclusion, for an extended period of time. Thinking about how the older one had acted this day, versus how he was before the incident.. Jiang Cheng puzzled everything together in his head bit by bit. He was clearly someone that a terribly lonely, yet overly giving person could lean onto, without having to fear that the person would actually let anyone in far enough to get crucially damaged the way it had happened to Lan Xichen before - at least Jiang Cheng had been such a person, until he snapped. Looking at the Jade now, it was clear that some trauma induced panic was setting in. A natural reflex now that - technically - the former limits weren't there anymore. It could lead to anything and nothing between them. They could end up close, way beyond the extend that the other must've thought was possible, even though at this point in time of course no one could say so for sure.

Even though Lan Xichen couldn't know what the younger leader was thinking, all of it was true. As drunk as he had been, the Jade had been sure from the moment where they had gotten closer and closer that it would have a bad end. "Knowing that" gave him inner peace, without him even realising it until now.. because the end had been a certain bad one, now.. anything was possible and that scared the hell out of him. He could just be turned into the fool again, get taken advantage off and then suddenly out of nowhere everything good would turn tragic. Or not, but he had turned too negative on the inside to think about a good end, without ripping it apart.

,,If you want to run, then run, but after how long and often you pushed me and stopped me from running, it would really be unfair and hypocritical if you do."

It wasn't necessarily that Jiang Cheng wanted to use the harsher way of wording and sounding, but something on the inside told him that if he'd be too nice, he'd only make things worse. Glancing over, he could see that the other relaxed a tiny bit after those words, yet he wasn't getting looked at at all.

,,It's probably going to be a surprise for you, but I'm going to tell you something. Keep it to yourself. When my father found Wei Wuxian on the road, he was around 9 at the time, I had 3 young dogs. They were my entire world.. However, as soon as he saw them, Wei Wuxian started to cry and he didn't stop for days, really. He was in a complete state of panic, even being comforted by my father wasn't enough to calm that brat. At the end I had to give the puppies away, I hated Wei Wuxian to the core.-"

Jiang Cheng was so bad with people, he didn't even know how to comfort anyone, so all he could do was talk about whatever was stuck in his mind at the time. - Lan Xichen though, didn't mind. The trailing off snapped him out of his panic, slowly - but gradually.

,,Not too long after father threw Wei Ying in my room, I was supposed to share it with him while they were away. I hated it, first my dogs, then my room. I threw him out as soon as father and mother were out of sight and told Wei Wuxian that: if he wouldn't disappear I'd let dogs hunt him down. He begged and cried and ran away. I only planned to let him sleep in like a hallway or something, but he got so scared 'cause I said I'd send dogs after him that he ran away. He ran for quite a while, we only noticed hours later and had to send out search teams. At the end A-Li found him on a tree crying his eyes out."

Jiang Cheng as much as he urged to laugh while reciting "ancient family history" couldn't quite get himself to. As good of a memory it was - nowadays, it had such a bitter aftertaste that he just couldn't. To his surprise though, for the first time in forever Lan Xichen spoke up in a neutral, rather low tone. Only after looking up from Zidian did he notice that the other had turned towards him at some point.

,,What were you doing while young master Wei was gone?"

,,Me?? I.."

Well, that had turned awkward quick, chewing on the side of his lower lip Jiang Cheng didn't know what to say - the truth was clearly not an option. After hesitating, he spoke a half-truth.

,,After a few hours I looked to see if he was alright. I had assumed he'd go in another room, or sleep in a hallway.. However, other than the Wei Wuxian you know, back then whatever you said to him - especially a parental figure - was a law. If you told him to eat something, he'd do so. If you told him to sleep in a certain room, but like at the time he wasn't allowed to, his brain would run haywire and with that he'd run himself as well. I only found his sheets and blanket neatly folded in a corner, told A-Li and so the search started."

,,You were already back then.. rather interesting."

Lan Xichen didn't believe that was all that had happened, but he let it slide - with his doubt being minimally audible in his tone as he spoke. He had covered himself with the robe and calmed down at this point.. Apart from that he had learned a few interesting things within the story.

,,I was spoiled rotten up to the point where he showed up. It had always been set that I would take over the Sect, just like A-Li's marriage with Jin Zixuan."

They both paused for a moment, Jiang Cheng because only after saying most so fluently felt the aftermath of it - while the Jade knew that sooner or later the others pain would kick in.

,,Do you have another story? I'm not overly used to hearing any."

The honest interest was audible in Lan Xichen's voice, his gaze going back and forth between glancing at the younger male's face and hands, just to keep a good look at his reactions.


	29. XiCheng 26

,,A lot."

Jiang Cheng replied soon after, his expression unintentionally showing a bit of "If you would know" before he looked back down. He needed a while to find a story that could somehow contribute to their current situation. It didn't even take him that long to find one, it was almost perfect, yet he tried to keep as neutral of an expression as possible to not give away too much already at the start.

,,Do you remember when all the sects promising disciples were sent to Gusu for studies?"

,,There's no way to forget all the things that occured, is there?"

They both had to suppress a chuckle, it had been a horrible starter for a story with such an obvious answer.

,,Even though Wei Wuxian always got in trouble, the worst of us all was actually Nie Huaisang."

Jiang Cheng glanced over for a reaction this time himself, he could only see the older one blink twice in a row yet he couldn't make out whether that was because Nie Huaisang had played a role within Jin GuangYao's death - which was until this day questionable.. or because of something else.

,,Nie Huaisang had an entire porn library in his room in the Cloud Recesses back then. That's why we never did anything against the rules in his room, so he wouldn't get caught."

,,That-.. That's truly interesting."

The half stutter in the Jades sentence and how little surprised he seemed caught the naked ones attention. He couldn't say yet though what was really going on. Setting that aside Jiang Cheng continued in his neutral tone for a last time before it would change.

,,We never got to know how it was possible for him to not get caught."

At this point Lan Xichen covered up that he almost choked on a breath he had halfway taken in with lifting his hand to his lips and clearing his throat. After that he fixed both: His expression and posture. By then Jiang Cheng knew there was more behind it,.. and as if it was something extremely forbidden, dirty and secret - which most of it it actually was - he began to whisper like a grandma that was just throwing around the latest rumours about someone in the neighborhood. He even scooted a little closer to the Jade, just for more effect.

,,Actually.. don't ever tell anyone.. but we were so young and in such a critical phase back then that... a few times when we 3 were drinking, we'd end up going through his books. More often than not our hormones got the best of us and we actually jerked off in front of one another to them."

It wasn't a lie, but it was a lie that it had happened so often. In truth, they were one time so drunk that they didn't even really take it in anymore that neither of them was alone and it happened. They were each in their own world, didn't even take a look at one another. And once Wei Wuxian was gone, so was the alcohol. It was purely an overstatement he made on purpose. Jiang Cheng would probably regret it once he was sober, but right now he got the reaction out of the other that he wanted. Leaning back, he let Lan Xichen choke for a few minutes before seeing his handsome face full of shock and confusion, which also ended up being audible once he spoke up.

,,Why would you do something like that?!"

,,It's nature. Other than what your shocked face might think, it's quite common for young guys to get it off in front of one another. Not with one another but you know. But, I can reassure you, together it didn't happen that often. We didn't even do it too often in our own rooms, we were scared shitless that Lan Qiren would catch us."

That was the truth, the only worse option was to be caught by Madam Yu and that honestly happened once - not a good memory Jiang Cheng had. However, he dismissed that memory as the others mind had gone so haywire that he blurted out.

,,As long as you follow the rules and don't draw negative attention towards you he wouldn't just enter your room at such times."

While it was the younger sect leader who showed the "Oh~ Caught you!~" pleased expression this time - Lan Xichen as soon as he realised the slip of his tongue tried to safe face, needless to say that it was too late. His stuttering and all of that only confirmed everything further, causing Jiang Cheng's initial smirk to grow into a grin.

,,I... It's.. It's not like.."

,,Too late, Huan. I always guessed that the headshaker had needed help from a Lan Sect cultivator, didn't think that it was you though."

,,I just.."

It wasn't that Jiang Cheng had no sense of shame left after hitting himself twice in the face. He simply wanted to give the Jade something back and he didn't know how to.. Spreading his legs and saying "Do me now".. Honestly, he wasn't quite ready for that. If it would happen in the flow of something, he probably wouldn't say no - especially knowing that they would each have their turn.. but just like that? So, all he could do was to bring shame over himself in a desperate attempt to make his lover realise that, even though it was intimate: Pleasing yourself in front of someone, talking about it or even doing it because of someone, were all natural matters. He couldn't even laugh seeing how overwhelmed Lan Xichen was now.

,,It's natural, as I already said. All about that part of life is, as little as I know about being human, that much I know. You might be even more shocked to hear it, but there are moments when you have to touch yourself either way in front of a lover.. for example, how do you wanna thrust in if you don't touch yourself?"

It was great.. just great. Now Lan Xichen wasn't only embarrassed to the core, his mind that was already all over the place was starting to play imaginations again that just embarrassed him more because he was actually getting needy for something. After moving his leg to cover up the slight tent he had grown, he couldn't help but glare at Jiang Cheng before saying in a almost begging tone.

,,Could you stop? It might be natural but-"

,,But what? If you think about it, what is worse.. Imagine we wouldn't have gone that far, or I would've turned you down after you got me off twice. You would've gone in your room and what? You would've jerked yourself off to an imagination of me, behind my back. If you could have the choice, would you rather have it that for example someone shows you they want you that much they can't help it, or think they don't want you even half as much?"

Honestly Jiang Cheng had interrupted the other so quick that he had to go through his speech afterwards himself again to see if it even made sense.. luckily it did. It started to piss him off how distorted of a view the Lan Sect guys were getting raised with.


	30. XiCheng 27

,,It's like turning the person into a mere lust object."

That was the best reply Lan Xichen could come up with. He knew he was running out of reasons, there was just something inside of him from all the years of rules and restraint that made him argue the things Jiang Cheng was saying.

,,For fucks sake.. What do you think we got those natural urges for? If you wouldn't feel lust for a person you'd of course also feel no desire for them, no desire, no love."

The smaller one was frustrated, he didn't have as skilled of a mouth as Wei Wuxian, he was running out of ideas and actually ended up throwing himself sideways over the middle of the bed. His face was maybe a foot length away from where Lan Xichens legs were, propped up on his elbow he let out a groan. What the hell was he supposed to do with this hopeless case of a man? He was running a few things through his head, but at the end he couldn't come up with a single thing - As he knew, he was too simple of a man for a Lan Sect cultivator. Jiang Cheng was about to give up when his mind finally made the one thing pop up that he needed "we can restrain our imagination only so and so far due to being cultivator" and what not all - Lan Xichen had dug his own grave.

,,Let's lay down. Don't ask questions. Don't talk. Just close your eyes and listen."

It was a bold move to order the older one of them to do something, yet he did anyway while changing his own position so they'd end up laying normally on the bed again. He was still on his side, patting on the spot beside him.

There were clear question marks appearing above the Jades head. He had remained silent, neither did he know how to fight back, nor did he really want to. Some moments passed before he actually did as told.

Jiang Cheng however kept his eyes on the taller one, his expression was rather relaxed and even though he felt pain from the wound on his cheek he didn't care that much. As he spoke his voice was a little above a whisper, he wasn't really used to dirty talk yet, nor anything like that but his voice was still calm enough to be rather hypnotising - especially since it wasn't the norm for him.

,,So.. you think that getting yourself off to someone in front of them turns the person into nothing but a mere sex object.. Don't answer. You probably think it's like degrading them, don't you? It's probably because it's different from sex, where you both want to get it off with one another, consent and all of that, or?"

Even though he wasn't supposed to answer, the older one couldn't help but hesitantly nod after being told off once for opening his mouth.

,,I already gave you the permission to do so though. If I allow it and you wanna do it, consent is there isn't it? I wouldn't have a problem right now with getting it off in front of you. Honestly, it would be the least gay we would've done so far. Or is the problem that you secretly for once really want to get spoiled, have me all over you... or do you really want to be inside of me that bad?"

Lan Xichens eyes flung open. He was confronted from a direct stare of the other while his expression was between shocked and being caught. Out of reflex he shut his eyes again, other than Lan Wangji, but only if he was really embarrassed, his face did turn red - like now.

,,How do you want to survive all the way if you don't even dare get yourself off in front of me? You don't even dare to properly say in my face that you want it to begin with."

,,It's not that easy, A-Cheng-"

,,There, you could've just said "I want you" instead. Even a word shorter than your sentence and at this rate you won't even get to know what could happen, if you'd say it. That is at least, if you actually believe that I want it."

,,I... I can't make out a difference between your teasing and when you are serious at the moment. That's a matter that shouldn't get talked about so lightly, yet you are able to do so.."

,,'Cause I'd risk getting fucked from you just to mess with you, sure thing. I just won't touch you at all anymore and just talk."

Jiang Cheng could actually be quite the stubborn one when he really wanted to get his point across. It was his spoiled side from childhood days acting up, like when he knew perfectly well that Zidian should've been able to whip out Wei Wuxian's soul from Mo Xuanyu's body at the first try - but to get what he wanted he'd abandon his knowledge and try it another time anyway. It was the same right now, the chance was low that he'd get the Jade to do what he wanted - and for that, the chance that he'd get Lan Xichen to shut off and run was way too high.

The taller male, once he heard that there'd be no touching felt once again like curling up. He really wasn't used to someone not giving him what he wanted either, if he was completely honest. Especially since he had turned into the Lan Sect leader, even if he didn't want things he'd get them anyway..


	31. XiCheng 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A small warning for kinky Jiang Cheng who's appearing now - let your imaginations run wild my dear reader

,,Think about it..-"

The younger one of them spoke up again in a low yet well audible tone of voice, once a minute or a bit more time had passed. As he talked, his eyes travelled all over the wild god's body. It was the first time that he really took the other in entirely, before they had been too engrossed in arguing or tending to one another for it. The robe, the skin color, the blush that slowly faded from Lan Xichen's fine facial features.. Before he knew it the words came out naturally, he imagined what he talked about himself from the top point of view which made it easier to blend out that the other would think about it with him as the.. as the..

,,After being away for a while, or having a shit day... you come home and as you enter, you can already smell the scent of your lover. You hesitate, the entire house is silent.. for a few moments you stand there, waiting for your lover to greet you, say that you're home,.. But instead of that, you faintly hear them calling your name in a weak, trembling tone. A part of you is worried, another can recall the sound of it. As silently as you can, you walk towards the bedroom.. you take a glance through the crack of the door. Soon you spot your lover on your bed, but they don't notice you.. their breathing is heavy, body exposed and barely covered from the sheets.. for a moment you're worried, but as your gaze travels further you realise that they are teasing themselves, while their face is half buried in the pillow that smells after you. The calls and moans of your lover get weaker, yet more desperate.. they call for you again and again while their body gets more and more restless, as the way they touch themselves begins to quicken and loose their former rhythm to ecstasy..-"

The voice of Jiang Cheng was getting lower, a little more restless as well the longer he kept talking. It wasn't a foreign imagination to him. In truth, it was one he had since almost as long as he could recall being able to get hard,.. He had always secretly dreamed of someone welcoming him in Lotus Pier, not always in such a way, but honestly.. all ways were fine, if there'd just finally be someone waiting for him. However, within his imagination, his lover had always been a nameless, faceless maiden with no distinct voice,.. he didn't have anyone he liked, truly desired or so - until now, where he couldn't help that the maiden with no identity switched places with the wild god.

As the younger one paused to let out a shaky breath, he was unsure about what he was even waiting for, or trying to provoke at this point. His hand however reached down and wrapped loosely around his length before he closed his eyes.

By now the Jade was in the same state that he had been in prior to their last argument: Hand tugging on the sheets, breathing heavily, trying hard to resist the urge to reach down. As much as he wanted to refrain from getting lost in the imagination, especially now that Jiang Cheng had went through some sort of awakening.. At the same time, he really wanted to escape his entire fate..

,,They tense and turn and pull your pillow closer to themselves.. You want to join them, spread their legs and drive them wild.. The way your lover aches for you and moans your name feels so thrilling and good that you want to hear more of it. If you'd be able to, you'd watch them continue for hours, knowing that they're yours and only yours. You lean against the door frame, your cock is rock hard and ready to fuck them senseless.. But at the end, your body doesn't move an inch from its spot until they cramp and scream your name loudly, in pure pleasure.."

At this point Jiang Cheng let out a curse, his hand had been teasing himself for a while. He really wasn't close, not after cumming twice before, but the twitch of his length and the pre-cum he leaked were a lot more than he was used to. To his surprise, after opening his eyes and stopping the stroking motions to collect himself..

Lan Xichen was out of it, he had never felt so horny in his life before - not even as a teen. Having gotten riled up and by far not enough relief really took it's toll on him. He had never listened to his inner voice that lust and all of those matters were,.. but again, the more one restrains a part of themselves, the louder it will get when the time comes - and right now he was getting drowned from noise. Whatever there was to sex, he wanted it - to the point where he actually felt like he was going to die.

What Jiang Cheng only noticed after opening his eyes and the thing that Lan Xichen himself didn't realise was that.. The older one of them was pretty much acting the exact same way as Jiang Cheng's imaginary lover. At some point of all their movements, they had switched their previous sides of the bed, the younger leaders scent was all over the side the Jade was now laying on and he did end up burying his face in the pillow. Most of Lan Xichen had by now been exposed, yet just the right amount of his body was still covered from the purple robe.. His eyes were closed, hand tending to his length in a tight, slow yet passionate manner.. However, some restraint was left, because the older one of them was biting on his lower lip, or here and there gritting his teeth to suppress both his breathing and pleasured noises, that would've escaped otherwise.


	32. XiCheng 29

Honestly, if the younger one of them would've known how to fuck a man, he'd have been at it quick. He needed some seconds to hold back the urge to pin the Jade down and bite his neck. It had really been easier in his head to withstand the temptation of such a scene. However, the extended pause in his terrible attempt at dirty talk of some kind caused the wild god to stir, the gritting of his teeth that he had been doing stopped and for a second.. there could be a bit of a pout seen on his face.

|What should I do..? I want to fuck him like mad right now, but I for fuck don't know how to.. Should I get him to tell me somehow.. I don't think he'd even say no right now, but how much damage could I make..|

If Jiang Cheng would've known that he wasn't the only one feeling that way, so intensely that he could actually start to cry.. Who knows what it would've changed, but all he could do without knowing that was pull himself together and continue his little game until he would figure out a answer to his questions.

,,Your lover ends up tensing and trembling, they shout your name loudly one last time while they release the tension and sadness about your absence... They aren't even halfway through, when you feel your body move, neither of you are really mentally there.. your heart is beating like mad and without making a noise you close the distance between the door and the bed. Your lovers eyes are closed.. you get on the bed, part their legs and throw yourself over them. You don't even give them a chance to look, you can't because of how much you want them. Your lips crush together, it hurts, but you're on too much of a rush to care about anything.. We moan into each others mouths.. your arms and legs wrap around me.. I press against you, without giving a damn about the mess my robe turns into 'cause of your release... Huan, come here.. if you want to bite on something bite on my finger or something but stop biting on your lips.. it's going to leave a bruise at this rate.."

Lan Xichen had lost face at this point, his hand was working its magic since a good few minutes by then over his length. He was a leaking mess, his mind clouded from pleasure, so deeply that he neither felt the pain from his lips - nor did either of them realise that the other had switched from "your lover" to himself as the top perspective. However, even though Jiang Cheng enjoyed the scene, like most would, he spoke up once the biting on the lip got severe enough to make it clear that the thin skin would break soon. It was unconsciously yet the younger one pulled the Jades head to his chest before he gently, but still with some force parted his lips with his fingers. Jiang Cheng ached to kiss the other, but that was as far as he could go right now without flipping them over and doing what Lan Xichen had forced himself to not do earlier. No matter the want for it, if the Lan Sect leader had managed without prior release and bloodshot eyes,.. he had to manage as well.

The older Lan brother had always been far more open with how he felt, or.. he was far more full of expression than Lan Wangji. It was somewhat of a pain that either had he come to dislike that part of himself so much, or it was all only to a certain degree to begin with. However, while Jiang Cheng's intentions had been pure, Lan Xichen bit on his fingers quite hard - it was more accidentally and caused from the moan he let out instantly once his lips parted.

While the taller male was too far into his little self-loving session, Jiang Cheng was left behind with a bit of a shock as well as confusion.. He couldn't for fuck figure out if he was a masochist now or not, because the moan and the bite had happened so in sync that the electric wave that went through him straight down to his cock could be caused from either or both at the same time. Staring at his fingers that he had instinctively pulled away, he was hit by another shocker as he felt the wild god nuzzle against his chest while moaning softly, yet overly pleasured.. Did his heart always have such a strange way of beating? Jiang Cheng could feel it thump, then pause, then continue to beat like mad in his chest. He didn't know anymore, yet his expression grew quite soft as his slowly bruising fingers got tangled into the older males hair to keep him close to his chest.


	33. XiCheng 30

Holding him in that position, the younger one continued with his bit of book knowledge he had about straight sex, once he realised that even with all the changes Lan Xichen neither stopped nor snapped out of his little pleasure bubble. By now, his own voice quavered but he pulled through either way and closed his eyes again while the melody the older one let out kept re-echoing in his mind.

,,You tug on my hair as I grind against you.. We both let out loud moans and only after a long time reach both of our free hands after my robes.. within seconds you tear them apart without hurting me one bit.. I try to sit up to undress further but you won't let our bodies part.. Slamming my lips against yours again, I give in.. I rub against you kinda forcefully for a while longer before reaching down.. as I pull my pants down I break the kiss and start teasing your neck.. all the spots that make you moan so sweetly.. You're so used to me fucking you by then that your legs wrap back around me without a care in the world.. all you want is to have me inside, we both want nothing but our bodies combined... We're both leaking like mad and I reach down again to position myself... I tease you, for a few minutes I act as if I'm going to give you what you've been aching for, but I don't.. not until you tell me how much you want me.. that you can't wait.. not as long as I got some restraint still... You look at me with those dark eyes of yours, full of begging and desire.. Only then I thrust in all the way, without a warning.. while staring in your eyes-"

It had gotten so unbearably hard for Jiang Cheng to continue talking. He couldn't even imagine how hard it must've been earlier for his lover, since at the end in Yunmeng he could pretty much do whatever he wanted, whenever he felt like it.. it wasn't much of a task to disappear, get himself off and act as if nothing had ever happened - In Gusu though.. what hell must that be?

However, Lan Xichen was both enduring and overly sensitive because of that. It was clear that the more often he tried to get it off, or the more often he did so, the time he needed to find relief then became longer and longer.

As Jiang Cheng had began to speak up the last time though, while the older male was teasing himself the way he knew best - by then still -.. He began to tremble, lightly at first, yet the closer the other got to the "important part" the worse it went. Jiang Cheng didn't let go of him though, he kept holding onto the Jade's head while his breathing kept growing heavier and more erratic, moans soft but hunted like.

It was intense, for each of them in their own ways, yet as Jiang Cheng was at the point in the imagination where he their bodies combined.. Lan Xichen let out a choked moan, which could've been a failed attempt at cursing as well, he tensed and let out a few more of those choked noises as the waves of his second release took him over. At first, the younger one of them tensed as well, the wetness that ended up covering him wasn't a small amount - probably due to the built up of the former teasing.. But again, he remained in the same position, holding onto the trembling Jade before he sooner or later slowly and really by far not entirely calmed down.

,,That-"

,,If you plan to apologise or so, don't say it.."

Several minutes had passed before Lan Xichen realised what had happened, he tensed again but for a different reason this time and spoke up in a hurry. His tone was a rough, after climax one but his intentions were clear.

Stopping him before he could go back into his shell, the smaller sect leader spoke in a calm tone that had a faint hint of dominance in it. A second later he continued, not without letting out a chuckle.

,,Fuck.. I just realised I changed the perspective to it being us now.. That's shit embarrassing..... Hey.. Huan, tell me honestly... Did it feel good? Was it that horrible?"

,,..."

,,You reacted so strongly I had to stop jerking myself off a few minutes into it.."

,,You-"

,,Didn't notice it huh? After being a piece of shit, I debated what I could do, only thing I could come up with is triggering your imagination.. I'm not the best at plan making and all such crap.."

,,..."

,,Did it feel so good you can't talk? Or do you hate me now? Fuck.. the longer I kept talking the more I wanted to flip you over and fuck you.. No idea how the hell you managed to keep calm earlier.."

,,..."

,,So, did it feel good or not?"

,,.. You won't give up until I say something will you?"

,,I won't. I've embarrassed myself enough for now."

,,... I.... I don't know.."

,,..? You don't know what?"

,,It's... all confusing... I've never even.. done that twice in a row.."

Even though he had let the older one hide against him the entire time, now Jiang Cheng lifted the others head, their faces were quite close and Lan Xichen's flushed in the darkest of pinks possible for a blush. The younger one in turn was shocked and had lost track.

,,You never got yourself off twice in a row? Like.. never?"

,,..."

,,.. That's... incredible, I must say.."

,,.. A-Cheng.. I.. I really don't know what to say.."

,,How about ripping apart that cringe story of mine 'cause it's entirely turning you into a lust object?"

,,... I........ I guess I do agree more with your first opinion now.."

,,.. My first opinion..? You dirty little shit! So at the end you didn't find it that bad, huh?"

,,... It's... Most like me for my looks, or my sect, there's mostly nothing else but that behind anything.."

,,Huan, to be straightforward, i think more people would like to fuck you because you're you."

Lan Xichen choked, he wasn't used to so much "foul language" and all that had been going on. Who even knew that Jiang Cheng could actually be somewhat easygoing to begin with? Jiang Cheng in turn didn't even know anymore what the hell he was doing or saying, he just felt weirdly hyper inside after making his lover lose some of his restraint - even if it would more than likely take a long time before the other would be able to jerk off freely in front of anyone. For Jiang Cheng it was for once a rather good achievement.. and for his virgin self it was even better.


	34. XiCheng 31

,,So.. you.."

,,I'll go get us a drink, I think you need a moment to sort your mind. You aren't talking properly at all, right now"

It was the truth, Lan Xichen's voice sounded raspy and rough from all the coughing, as well as choking. He also couldn't say a single proper sentence out loud, due to the whirlwind of emotions and thoughts that were running around in his head. Having that pointed out by the younger one that got up and left before he could react, all he could do was.. wait.. pout.. panic in virgin and play with the blanket. Now that his mind was clearing slightly, he could say that he really had never felt as relaxed before on the inside, even though he was a mess on the inside at the same time. He didn't know that Jiang Cheng was giving each of them a bit time to themselves on purpose..

Yet the longer the Jade spend alone, the more he recalled things. At the end, he rolled around once on the bed, stopping as he laid on his back and covered his face with his hands. To his embarrassment, the hand he had used to tend to himself with was sticky and wet. Staring at it his eyes widened, but as he heard movements of the younger one he rolled back onto his side. As Jiang Cheng didn't come back yet and so Lan Xichen hesitantly lifted his hand and ran it gently over the spot that the other had previously pressed him against his chest with. A teenage girl with a major crush, that's what he was at that point.

The younger sect leader had opened the jar of liquor within no time,.. However, unknown to him they were both in a slight way in the same state. He was recalling it all, staring at his hand,.. God, how glad he was that Lan Xichen wasn't around now where Zidian was letting out tiny purple sparks. Zidian usually only reacted to any kind of negative emotions or injuries of his owner, but right now he seemed to either make fun of Jiang Cheng or.. Shaking his head Jiang Cheng filled the 2 cups they had already used, debating for a moment if he should drown the remaining alcohol that was in it, or pour it over his head.

What Lan Xichen wouldn't get to know however, was that Jiang Cheng actually saw most of what he had done in the bedroom. The slightly smaller male had poured the glasses, taken a moment and then he walked towards the door just as the other rolled around. Of course, Jiang Cheng hid but kept watching silently.

|So he does like being spoiled and wants just that actually, huh?|

It was a little realisation the younger leader had, nothing negative even. He should've realised before, but only did so now, that they in their core really weren't that different. However, the moment of realisation wasn't the last because the next thing Lan Xichen ended up whispering in a tone so hyper yet full of disbelief it almost got him to drop the two cups.

,,So.. he really wants to sleep with me as well.."

There was it, the one thing Jiang Cheng had been pushing and pushing to get it out of the older ones mouth.. but now where it was serious.. No.. it had been serious the entire time, but due to them being either caught in arguments or "soft" sexual actions with one another... It hadn't been.. It hadn't been said out loud - it hadn't been THAT serious.

It was too late, from both of their ends.. but right now where they were both "alone" the way too belated panic kicked in. While Lan Xichen sat up on the bed, hiding his face with his hands while running the nothing he knew about gay sex through his mind.. Jiang Cheng had almost in slow motion walked back to the living room area, sitting down his leg shook up and down like mad. The fingers of his left hand were playing nervously with Zidian who rested on his right.

|I'm going to mess up. I'm so going to mess up. What the hell am I supposed to do now?!"

They were literally thinking the exact same thing, at the exact same moment. While Lan Xichen's thought continued with "I only have book knowledge, that's not going to end well." - Jiang Cheng's continued with the fact that he had no knowledge at all. He could somewhat tell where the only option of "intrusion" was and it all just.. They were extremely panicked virgins.

Neither took in how many minutes passed before they both went back to what they had done prior to their belated midlife crisis. Lan Xichen laid back down, while the other came back into the bedroom with a fixed expression yet on legs that felt like jelly.

Everything had gone so naturally until now that they hadn't had to think much, but now that they were out of it.. How were they supposed to find their way back in? Neither knew.

,,Here."

As the younger one held the cup in his direction, the Jade sat up and took it before making a slight bow with his head while smiling sweetly.

They were screwed, they were completely out of the flow that had saved them before.

After having the "shot", since it wasn't much more, for once Lan Xichen actually thought that more alcohol would be the better option. However, after putting the cup aside he took and let out a deep breath. He didn't dare to make eye contact, but his voice, even though barely audible was a clearly honest tone.

,,.. I.. I am probably going to struggle with saying that out loud.. so I apologise in advance for it.... To answer your question from a few minutes ago... Even though I feel overly embarrassed... I didn't dislike it... in truth... I actually... liked it... It's the first time in my life that I went against so many.. of the rules that I have set for myself... and I must admit.... that probably for more than one reason,.. I feel a lot lighter.."

If it wouldn't have been rather unexpected of a confession, Jiang Cheng would've probably cracked up at the pun about the literal loss of weight the other had released on him. He still hadn't taken his shot though, because.. He honestly had a few more before coming back to the bedroom. Unsure whether or not the other wanted to say more, he remained silent and stared at the cup he held in his hands.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly crack up whenever I think about or reread the chapter to find mistakes


	35. XiCheng 32

And Lan Xichen did continue, after a bit of a pause - one he needed to get out words, he probably never expected to say out loud in several lifetimes.

,,I only saw things from my restrained point of view.. and honestly, until the conversation got brought up.. I never tried to think about all of those matters too much.. Once you have it in your mind.. it's there.. I don't think I'd be able to do such a thing.. purposefully in front of anyone.. but I think I can understand how something.. something like what you said can happen... However,..-"

,,You want the closeness.. You want to get one another off, not yourself alone in your room, or anything like that."

,,Well.."

It wasn't far from the truth at all what Jiang Cheng interrupted him with, it was simply.. that the older one of them would've never been able to say it out loud like that, even though he was about to say something similiar. While Lan Xichen visibly felt a little awkward, the other did so himself secretly.

,,I get it, honestly. Why would you want to get yourself off when you can just.."

Jiang Cheng had drowned his glass before he spoke up again and put it away, yet as he leaned only slightly back afterwards and turned.. Their faces had ended up so close again that they could really take in even the smallest of features on the others. For a few seconds they only sat there like that, no further movement, simply their hearts began to thump wildly within their chest.. Due to both: nervousness and sexual tension.

It was unclear how often they swallowed, it wasn't even audible to them themselves about themselves,.. even if they'd try to figure it out later, they wouldn't be able to count how often they, at first out of and soon in sync, ended up looking from one anothers eyes to lips and back and forth.

At the end, once both of their way of breathing had grown so heavy and the tension from before drowned out any kind of nervousness.. When it grew too unbearable for either of them to stay still, did they both end up moving at the same time. While Jiang Cheng pulled the wild god closer, with a tight and strong tug of the robe - Lan Xichen's hand had at the same time found its way to the back of the others head. Fingers entangled in both cloth and hair they both shut their eyes as soon as their lips met.

They didn't waste much time when it came to keeping their tongues to themselves.. And even though, yet again, the kiss had a gentle underline - it was filled with passion and hunger. Embracing or getting embraced, as much as they worried about it when they were alone just moments ago.. Once they were devouring one another again, they realised each on their own that.. it totally didn't matter, who even cared?

The next movement, after minutes of making out, was again hard to categorise as eithers first.. Pulling one another over they somehow.. ironically enough, ended up in the same position Jiang Cheng had pulled them into as he first tried to make an "even base" for them: Dropping to the side, the older males hand remained in the others hair - the smaller leaders let go of the robe, trailed over the others skin and at the end cupped and kneaded his lovers ass. Both of their movements where quite clumsy, a little rough, but nothing was painful or even uncomfortable. After moaning into one anothers mouth deeply a few last times, their lips parted, Lan Xichen bopped his nose against the younger ones - it was hard to break the kiss entirely.

,,Fuck.. Honestly, if you won't tell me within the next 5 minutes that you want it as bad as I do, I'm gonna throw a fit and run out naked.."

Jiang Cheng spoke up first, his tone barely more than a whisper. It sounded somewhat sweet, yet desperate and ended with a slight awkward chuckle.

Lan Xichen tensed briefly, only for a second or two, then he let out a quite adorable little laugh himself before saying in a tone that was low, as well with more of a teasing and amused vibe to it.

,,That would honestly be the most you've acted like yourself within the past hour or so now, A-Cheng."

,,Shut up!"

The younger one tried to glare and act all serious, but it didn't work and only made the Jade chuckle some more.

,,Do you even need to hear it at this point?"

,,I don't.. Maybe it's just my asshole self acting up.. I just want to hear you say it."

,,Then.. Would you be able to say it out loud A-Cheng..?"

They were both talking in the same manner, eyes half lidded. Jiang Cheng hesitated, they were clinging so desperately to one another - He knew the answer, he just had to come to terms with it a last and final time. Once it was clear, for a short while at least, something inside of him went terribly calm and peaceful.

,,I want it."

The younger one said, locking eyes with the other as he did. Lan Xichen stared at him wide eyed, it was cute how he still hadn't expected that with all that they had been doing. After a moment, the slightly smaller one of them spoke up again.

,,Huan, what about you..? Or do you at the end not want it bad enough regardless of what your body is telling us both?"

Lan Xichen closed his eyes, after coming to terms or deciding something for himself.. As he opened them again and looked in Jiang Cheng's, he then let out a terribly shaky breath while saying in a desperate tone - that so wasn't like him.

,,I want it.. badly.. Since the first time you reacted to my touch.. I can barely control myself..."


	36. XiCheng 33

,,Then... What do we need to do..?"

Jiang Cheng ended up asking, he had to,.. yet it felt so awkward that he had to break the eye contact.

The older one of them didn't feel much better. How was he supposed to explain the actions he had read about.. that literally went far deeper than a simple teasing of one's own length? For a moment he thought about only reciting the quote from the book, but that only sounded worse than trying to word it out himself. At the end he spoke up in a bit of a hurried tone, that was really almost inaudible the longer he tried to get those words out.

,,.. Well.. you see.. It's..... I think we both know that there is only one option.. and that's really not made... not made for such a..... Y-.. you have to prepare....-"

,,Okay, stop.. That... I.. Just no."

The slightly smaller male couldn't bear hearing it said out loud after all. He could add 1+1 together and kind of figured what needed to be done. Prepare, hence you'd need to.. You would need to.. He only noticed a few seconds later, as the imagination ran through his panicked mind, that he had covered his lovers mouth with his hand. Pulling it away, he cursed and banged his head against the arm of his that he was resting on. Unable to meet the Jade's eyes, he half stuttered his words.

,,Do you.... Do you think.. You can just... just do it..?"

Lan Xichen didn't get what the other had meant. He thought Jiang Cheng was trying to hint at just skipping the process he had failed to explain.. which caused his eyes to widen and in his state of shock he spoke up in a matching tone.

,,You want me to just.. thr-"

,,No! No! That, no! I meant that.. just show me for fucks sake. The more I hear, the more I panic and.. Don't just thrust in, you ass!"

Hearing Jiang Cheng speak in clear panic, the older ones expression turned into a "Ah!", he had finally gotten the point the other had tried to bring across. Lan Xichen didn't even take in that he had been about to use the term "thrust in" himself.

Closing his eyes, Lan Xichen tried to calm himself as far down as he could. At this point, he was still running his book knowledge through his head on endless repeat. They both had a minute, maybe two, before he opened his eyes and reached out to gently lift the younger ones chin. Brushing his lips against Jiang Cheng's a few times, his mind that had previously not known in which direction everything would lead.. turned towards the one that he needed right now. It was way too natural, how easily he switched from being ready to take, or get taken.. to his gentle, yet passionate top side - ready to ease the other in, make him moan and shiver,..

Once the tsundere had calmed down enough to noticeably ache for a kiss, the older one let their lips meet. The kiss was a slow, gentle one with no tongue involved for a long time, before he asked for entrance. As the others lips parted Lan Xichen then began to take over his lovers mouth. It was the first time that, even though only faintly noticeable, their roles were rather clear.

Taking each step, even those they had already previously taken, Lan Xichen only turned them around after many minutes. A foreign rush of adrenaline and excitement was slowly starting to take him over - and not only him, Jiang Cheng didn't feel much better. The older one was hovering above and between the others legs, sooner or later his right hand began to caress the scarred chest, the others sides, arms and stomach.

They had both twitched several times, yet sooner or later Lan Xichen broke the kiss, propping himself up on both of his arms he stared at the other. His expression so soft and gentle.. everything about him seemed even more gentleman like than usually. The reassurance he could give, just with the look in his eyes and the tone in his voice once he spoke up was almost breathtaking. - And honestly, the nothing knowing, scared to death Jiang Cheng really needed that more than anything. Who knows what would've happened if at this point, where it was actually about to get serious, he'd have a lover that openly showed nervousness and all of that?

,,I'm going to ask you now, since.. It's quite possible that as much as we want it.. you won't be too comfortable for a while... Are you really sure that you want it? Are you alright.. and first of all... are you comfortable in this position..?"

The wild god was staring at him so intensely, really scanning his face for the slightest of changes or hints of something, that Jiang Cheng froze for a few seconds. After that, he could only nod in silence.

,,If at any point you want to stop... or a pause... just say so.. No.. You have to say it."

It was the first time in his life, after knowing the older Lan brother for almost 2 decades, that he actually heard him use a dominating tone of voice. This time, he naturally instantly nodded. However, the taller male didn't seem to be satisfied - finally, Jiang Cheng gave in.

,,I got it, alright?! Are you going to get it over and done with today still, or what?!"

,,It's for your sake."

The reply came so quick, dry and with a chuckle at the end that Jiang Cheng's jaw dropped.

Using the moment, Lan Xichen leaned in and began to tease and tend to his lovers neck, it came so sudden that he could faintly feel the others hips move up. A moan was audible as well, yet he knew what destination they had and only took everything about the other in like a study, more than for arousal.


	37. XiCheng 34

From this point on Lan Xichen could feel something snap inside of him.. It was as if his body rather naturally knew what to do - at least to some extent. He was strangely calm, his senses on overdrive when it came to listening to his lovers reactions. For a few minutes, he kept the teasing going before he sat up and reached for the pillow they weren't using. Then he said in a tone that was overly gentle, yet strangely masculine at the same time.

,,A-Cheng, could you lift your hips for a moment and spread your legs a little more?"

Jiang Cheng hadn't even dared to look to see what the older male was doing, once the tending to his neck had stopped. He was honestly starting to feel himself and.. and then the others words sank in, they had come out of the Jade's lips so easily that for a bit he actually thought he had some weird dirty minded moment.

,,A-Cheng..?"

Only as Lan Xichen repeated his name did the younger one realise it was actually real. His eyes flung open as he stared at the other in shock. After that, instead of his hips.. he lifted up his hands and covered his face, saying in pure disbelief, and almost a whining manner.

,,I can't fucking believe I'm actually fucking doing this.."

,,You don't have to-"

,,For fucks sake, just shut up! It's just 'cause you're so damn slow and always keep on ripping me out of.."

Before the younger one could continue his panicked tsundere, virgin rant, he felt his hips part from the sheets, a moment later he was let back down with his ass a little higher up in the air than before. Once he dared to glance down.. he realised he shouldn't have, his hips were positioned on a pillow. Even a virgin like him could tell it was probably to make "certain things" easier.

,,Are you sure you want me to completely take the lead?"

Lan Xichen spoke once he had demonstrated how things could actually run between them.. And it made click once again for the slightly smaller male that whatever he wanted was what the other was reacting to. With some hesitation, he spoke while one of his arms covered his face - the other going back to rest on the sheets.

,,... If you don't.. I don't think we'll ever get anywhere.."

,,Then.. If you want to hide - hide.. If you want to try a position where you don't have to face me at all - say so... There are only two things you need to do... try to refrain from moving too much and.. the harder task should be for you to calm down, as far as it's currently possible.."

The natural leader inside of the wild god came out, yet he wasn't ordering the other around.. it were more genuine tips. However, his lover could only nod in response.. And so, Lan Xichen leaned back over the others body, but not without gently pressing Jiang Cheng's left leg a tad further to the side with his right hand. Only for a short while this time did he tease his lovers ear, neck and collarbone area - just to get him to space out a little again and relax.

It wasn't even about being scared now, Jiang Cheng knew in his core that the other wouldn't hurt him. Hell, each movement he made was done with no force at all. It was just.. so overly surreal and embarrassing. Lan Xichen learned, or remembered, things quickly though.. because short after the younger males mind began to get clouded, he could feel this strangely pleasurable sensation around his chest area where those soft lips attacked. It was really not a spot that either of them had thought Jiang Cheng would be sensitive at, but he couldn't refrain from letting out a few faint pleasured noises, not long after the teasing had started.

Only for a short moment did the Jade stop to tend to the from the teasing hardened nubs.. He didn't even hesitate in the process of letting some of his saliva drip down on his hand.. Lan Xichen only hesitated as his right hand reached down and to the most private of spots his lover had and just mentioned one tensed. Neither of them spoke up, it wasn't the right moment for words - it was something Jiang Cheng had to either win or lose against himself. Staring at him as nothing but the tension occured the older one of them went back to tease the nub from before.

A minute or two passed before the tsundere let out a growl, followed from a heavy breath, seconds later the tension vanished. It felt weird and wrong already now, but if he'd chicken out at this point after talking the way he had done the entire past.. hours? Well, more than likely hours by then, honestly that went more against his pride than pulling through and maybe acting like he forgot from the next morning on - for the rest of his life.

Lan Xichen gave his lover a bit more time before he, as lightly as he somehow could manage, rubbed his quite wet fingers against the other. They were both weirdly aroused and equally as panicked inside, yet they repeated the process from before. Tensing, pause in motion, tension vanishes with a growl. Only then did Lan Xichen began to really make out with any spot on Jiang Cheng's upper body that he could easily reach.. and soon, his fingers began to massage the spot that was supposed to let him in. Ever so lightly at first, he was only trying to get them both accustomed.. then gradually did he begin to add the tiniest bits of pressure to make the muscles relax further.

It was all by far too new, foreign and unknown for either of them to feel overly aroused by the act, yet the longer they were both trapped into their own worlds.. It did start to have a certain thrill to it.. The unknown, the way Jiang Cheng's body was struggling yet ultimately giving in, what they and their bodies were even capable of.


	38. XiCheng 35

Neither of the man had any sense of time and place left. Honestly, if it wouldn't be for the Lan Sects strict training that also involved physical matters.. the Jade would've probably lost the strength in his left arm already, way before anything had entered the younger ones body. At the end he shifted his weight once slightly, only so he could let a larger amount of saliva drip down on his hand. How should he go about it..? Should he speak up? Lan Xichen didn't know. By then the pressure he was putting onto his lovers sensitive muscles was enough to make them give in somewhat. Every so often he glanced up, however, Jiang Cheng seemed almost gone out, like he was either meditating - or had fainted and his body was simply letting out soft noises of pleasure, with occasional hints of tension on its own.

After a last glance, he shivered barely noticeably as he pulled lightly on one of Jiang Cheng's nipples with his teeth while then finally putting enough pressure onto the others muscles for the tip of his middle finger to slide in. It was so tight and soft already now that, even if the younger male wouldn't have tensed, Lan Xichen would've taken a break just so savour the sensation. His own body tensed, followed from a shaky long breath he let out before he spoke in a low as anything, somewhat overwhelmed sounding tone.

,,Are you alright?"

Was he alright? Jiang Cheng didn't know. There was his straight side that was still trying its best to fight against "all of that", yet.. With all the time that had passed where he got treated in such a manner, he could really not deny that it began to feel.. good. Even as the first hint of entering happened, the muscles had been massaged so thoroughly that one finger alone didn't hurt at all. In fact, he only tensed because the area had been so well prepared and wet that it felt pleasurable in such an odd way. Maybe it was due to how long they had taken to get there, or simply because for each of them in their own ways it was an achievement. As his mind was trying to process the sensation, he spoke up in a bit of a rough, barely audible tone without thinking about it.

,,You're treating me so well.. How could I not be?"

They both paused, Lan Xichen hadn't moved one bit for possibly minutes at this point. It reassured him to know about his lover being comfortable enough to say such a phrase. However, since Jiang Cheng had had enough time to come completely to terms with it at this point, so he spoke up again.

,,And you?"

,,Mh..?"

,,.. Each time I tense you don't move at all for who knows how long.. You're in the same position since forever by now.. Isn't it hard?"

Lan Xichen could feel some heat rush up to his face. Somehow, it was enough care shown to make him blush. After a moment he spoke up, a little shyly.

,,A little, but I'm trained enough to hold on."

,,It's okay."

The older male didn't understand what the other was trying to say. He blinked and watched how for the first time in forever Jiang Cheng lifted his arm from his face, and how he ended up resting his head on it. Even though the slightly smaller one didn't look at him, each bit of tension had vanished from his body, he looked overly calm and collected.

,,Huan, move already. The way you went about it until now.. it's crazy, but I've gotten used to it already.. Nothing hurt so far.."

,,.. Alright.."

They both only spoke each after a longer pause. Honestly, Lan Xichen could've cried tears of joy at this point.. not because of any pleasure he'd receive later on, simply because in that moment in time there was no better phrase, or no words he was aching to hear more than those Jiang Cheng had said.

From there on the Jade began to slowly thrust only with the tip of his finger for a while, then he gradually went deeper and deeper inside of his lover. As Jiang Cheng had thought, it felt weird - then it turned into a strange kind of pleasure. Only here and there as the thrusts deepened, did he tense in the faintest of intensities. The older one was still tending to his upper body in between, while he himself sooner or later had trouble keeping his eyes open.

Everything went so smooth that even though it felt extremely long, it was the shortest amount of times they had needed for a step so far. Somehow, Lan Xichen could sense when the time was right, when the muscles were ready for more. Hesitantly, he spoke up in almost an apologetic tone.

,,Sorry, I'll have to change the position for a moment.."

,,Mmh.."

Jiang Cheng couldn't reply with anything more than a pleasured, gone out sounding hum. He had honestly began to feel spoiled rotten and was in a state one would be at a spa, or during a massage - which.. it kind of was.

However, as the older one shifted his weight and sat up, originally to further lube the area before inserting another digit.. He hadn't pulled the first out and the motion caused 3 things to happen: Lan Xichen could feel a strange spot, one he had only faintly and too lightly touched before to really take it in. What shocked both of them however were the 2 reactions of Jiang Cheng. The younger ones hips moved against the pressure while he let out a moan that sounded so overwhelmed and pleasured that the other couldn't help but stare, twitch and tease it another time just to witness the same chain of events.

,,Fuck... the hell was that..?!"

Jiang Cheng spoke up once the Jade had removed the finger. As he looked up his expression showed confusion, yet his eyes were clouded as anything. The view he got wasn't of much help, the Jade was just looking far too hot and seductive in the process of lubing up two of his digits with sucking on them. Lan Xichen didn't seem to be confused at all, instead he appeared to be rather determined about something.. or maybe a little glad.

The wild god was in fact a little glad that he had found this little something so soon.. However, as his lover looked at him this way after speaking up, he took his fingers out of his mouth. They were extremely wet and in contrary to that, as well as the scene Jiang Cheng had gotten before, the smile he showed the younger one now was so gentle, just as reassuring and soft as the look in his eyes - which also matched the tone in which he spoke.

,,It's a so called sweet spot, a hidden one at that.. I must say, I thought it didn't exist until now.. How do you feel? Do you want me to stop?"


	39. XiCheng 36

Something inside of him told Jiang Cheng that he had to reply, or else nothing further would happen. His gaze averted to a spot on the ceiling, he had to think about an answer first.. which he gave the taller one after a few moments in a tone that was both rough in sound, but also making it clear that he was somewhat gone out.

,,.. I don't really know.. The entire middle of my body feels overly weird right now.. when you rubbed it it almost felt like a buzz,.. like when Zidian acts up, just... better.. it's nothing close to what it usually feels like.. kinda weird, but.. honestly not terrible.."

Lan Xichen's eyes widened a little, he hadn't expected a positive reply - or at least not such an honest one. He couldn't deny that, if Jiang Cheng was already capable of saying something like that.. he really couldn't deny that he was getting extremely curious to experience that foreign sensation himself. - They were like little kids doing something forbidden and the further in they went, the more thrilled they were.

The younger one then hesitated for a moment before he excused himself and left the bedroom. He was back within only a minute or so, even went back into his former position as if nothing had happened. Only then did he speak up, due to how puzzled and confused the other looked.

,,Not written in a book that you kinda feel like you have to take a leak, huh? With how much I drank, I honestly needed to leave sooner or later anyway."

,,Oh.."

Lan Xichen was only able to let out a noise between surprise and realisation. He had drank a lot less than the other, yet he hadn't thought about that at all.

,,Are you just going to let it get awkward or are you-.. oh.. fuck.."

Even though Jiang Cheng had spoken up in a normal tone at first, hearing the start of the sentence the older one had reacted naturally. The other was laying there in such a welcoming manner, that he had moved his hand back to where it previously had been. It went so smooth and gentle, the way Lan Xichen used the momentary distraction of his lover to put pressure and part those sensitive muscles with now the tips of two of his fingers.. Jiang Cheng choked and cursed, yet neither sounded overly displeasured.

,,Sorry.. I should've listened to what you had to say until the end.. when I noticed you wanted to continue, I began to move my hand.. as you didn't react.."

,,A certain someone is kinda excited,.. I get it."

While the older one of them blushed, his lover actually needed to hold back a bit of a chuckle. Both of them felt such strange sensations.. Already now, Jiang Cheng felt rather full, yet the Jades fingers were like everything else about him perfect. There was no rough spot, they were long and masculine, yet soft as anything. Lan Xichen in turn had now an even tighter embrace around his digits.

From there on everything proceeded like before.. Lan Xichen gave the other time to adjust, then he gradually moved further inside, stopping whenever tension appeared before the digits were wrapped up all the way. He hadn't went back into the position from before, yet here and there in between his free hand teased wherever he could reach. Only when all tension had vanished did he begin to make thrusting motions - it took a while for the muscles to noticeably adjust, yet they did.

Lan Xichen couldn't help that his eyes were kind of glued to the scene where their bodies connected,.. He only looked up as he felt the muscles clench around his fingers, the others breathing had gotten heavier without him even realising and he was clearly clenching his teeth. The older male could see though that it was nothing caused from negative sensations, speaking up in a loving, gentle tone that really would only be audible to them both - as long as no one else stood beside the bed.

,,A-Cheng.. If it feels good, don't hold back your voice.. Didn't you tell me that before as well.."

,,.. There's a difference.."

The Jiang Sect leaders voice trembled as he spoke, saying the same phrase he had also told the other off for using before. He was trying his hardest to keep his eyes open, his head resting normally on his arm that he had went back to use as a pilllow after the toilet break incident. It weirded him out, and rubbed him the wrong way a little that he already started to feel it enough from just fingers to be ready to moan.

However, even though it had happened before, Jiang Cheng hadn't taken in the strategy his lover had yet. He didn't notice that the taller male let some spit drip down on his digits as they had almost entirely left his body.

,,Is there really..?

,,There is..-"

The "a" Jiang Cheng was about to use in his argument came out as a rather overwhelmed moan. Just like before, the wild god had used the distraction to add another digit into the widening process. It were 3 by now, and even though he hadn't planned to do so, the muscles of the other had given in so far by then that they naturally ended up some deeper than with just the tip of them.

The slightly smaller male was tugging on the sheets out of reflex while the middle of his body was feeling tingly and all over the place. His mind was getting more clouded and he couldn't even close his mouth for a moment.

,,Let your voice out, doesn't it feel better that way?"

Moments had passed, just to coax Jiang Cheng the Jade had spoken up again.. and as he opened his mouth the older one pushed his digits further inside. Like before Jiang Cheng was unable to hold back a growl like moan, his muscles contracted, but not really because of tension - Lan Xichen could feel that the other wanted more from the way they tried to suck his fingers in.

They continued this way until there was no way for the digits to sink in deeper and to worsen the younger ones situation the other leaned back over him. Lan Xichen was far away from losing control, he spend such a long amount of time now on this one task, and he was enjoying each second of it. Taking one of his lovers nubs between his teeth he lightly pulled on it and began to make out with whatever spot he could reach.. just like before, all that while his three digits began to thrust, hitting that sweet spot of Jiang Cheng at first clumsily, but gradually more and more skilled.

The younger one caved in at some point. His head fell to the side, exposing his neck that also got some attention from the wild god while sooner or later soft, rough moans filled the room that were so full of pleasure, yet overwhelmed that it actually.. It actually began to get unbearable for the taller one of them to keep going just like that - yet he did, for as long as it took without regretting anything about it.

Secretly, and who knew if they'd ever admit, they both regretted not having done such a thing before - with one another, just like that.


	40. XiCheng 37

,,Get it over with already..!"

Lan Xichen snapped out of enjoying his task to the fullest once he heard the younger one speak up - in a failed attempt to sound threatening. They had been doing this for.. god knew how long by now. Jiang Cheng's voice didn't sound like a threat at all though, it was a rough, from moans interrupted version of his voice. They both knew, from the way it sounded that he'd probably not last much longer.. However, the Jade didn't immediately stop, it felt good - even to him, almost to the point where he thought he'd have "an accident" without need for further pleasure.

,,If.. fuck... if you get me off with.. your fingers now.. you won't get anything else.... and I'm going to... fucking hunt you down..."

As the smaller leader spoke up again, the other was torn in two.. Something really got to him about the idea of going with his fingers until the end.. yet not being able to get the cherry on top of the ice cream he had worked so hard for, really didn't sit too well with him. After a few more thrusts, and a last suck on one of the others nubs Lan Xichen slowly pulled out his digits while sitting up. At this point he didn't really care anymore about what he had done with his hands, or anything similiar to that.. He actually ended up running his hand through his slightly sweaty hair, as he took a few moments to calm himself and relax.

Jiang Cheng was meanwhile trying to calm himself as well, not that it overly worked. He couldn't describe what he was feeling at all.. but hell had he been close to something that felt so much more pleasurable than a normal release. The way he took and let out his breaths was just like his heartbeat nothing but erratic, out of rhythm.. his throat felt strangely relaxed yet dry, his body hot and heavy. His middle was a mess, he had leaked quite a lot.. They had been playing around like that for such a long time, even Jiang Cheng thought they should be so sick and tired of one another by now.. yet fuck.. was he aching for more, so much more of it all. He couldn't even help but look at his lover, even though he looked like a complete mess and had lost face entirely himself..

At the end the younger one didn't look, he actually stared at Lan Xichen who sat seiza style between his parted and on the pillow propped up legs. He still looked so elegant, even with sweat pearls running down his face, neck and finely toned upper body.. his breathing had calmed, only a few spots on his face showed faint hints of a pink tint, and the smile that played on his lips was just like the look in his eyes: gentle, loving and reassuring.. Which was quite the contrast to what Jiang Cheng saw when he glanced down - the Jade was, how the younger one thought, hard as a rock, throbbing with a clear string of lust leaking down on the sheets between his legs. Neither really knew at this point how Lan Xichen had managed to pull through for so long so calmly, but it was definitely worth some respect.

,,Do you want to change the position?"

The wild god asked while his hands were resting on his thighs.

,,I..."

What was Jiang Cheng supposed to say? "I can barely feel my legs because of all the pleasure"? That wasn't really an option, was it? It clearly wasn't and so he lightly tried to change the topic.

,,What about you? I mean, look at the situation you got going on there."

Lan Xichen chuckled, he didn't take a look but for a second his hand moved as if he wanted to stroke over his aching length.

,,I'm alright."

,,If you're alright, then thanks and get to your room well."

The older one really didn't want to make it noticeable when he was "suffering" at all, which kinda pissed Jiang Cheng off to the point where he actually pulled one leg over the other - shutting the sweet spot of his away. After that he glanced at his lover.. and for the first time Lan Xichen's jaw had actually dropped. He was sitting there after being told to leave, looking like an abandoned puppy. In truth he actually looked heartbroken, and as if he was ready to beg, or cry, or both at the same time yet didn't say a word.. he couldn't say a thing.

,,If me saying you won't get anything further almost gets you to break down within a second then, stop saying shit and acting all tough. If you keep going like that, I might actually get pissed and throw you out once. Since you forced me to let out my voice, but now you went back on your own words again... let me watch while you lube yourself up and tell me you want it, Huan..~"

There was it again, they had such a fluent way of switching roles - almost as if they were supposed to be together. Even Jiang Cheng's voice, as rough as it sounded from the pleasure of being a bottom, and his expression that still had this certain glow to it that also only came with being on the receiving end.. they had both such a tempting and dominating hint to it that they once again couldn't help but think about how much they wanted to see one another in each way possible.

Seeing the older males hesitation, Jiang Cheng's.. dominant bottom side came out, one where he didn't really have that much shame left,.. spreading his legs he smirked and lightly nodded into his lovers direction, making it clear that it was "either you do it, or that's it"..

And so, after his dark eyes travelled once all over the other, Lan Xichen lifted his right hand to his mouth. With his lovers stare on him, he didn't even manage to avert his gaze as he wettened his hand.. then he reached down and stroked over his length that looked lubed up even more painful, yet tempting than before.

Jiang Cheng in turn was letting his eyes wander up and down. He honestly enjoyed the view far too much and even propped himself up on his elbows while being in a trance like state from it. Once he was propped up enough he then spoke up in a tone that was a pure lure for his lover.

,,Do you want me?~"


	41. XiCheng 38

Jiang Cheng didn't get a reply, instead the next thing he knew was that their lips slammed together. The taller male had moved in the blink of an eye and one of his hands got a hold of the tsundere's nape. They both moaned and a moment later Lan Xichen had pressed him down on the bed, not with his entire weight, not without making sure the others head was safe and that he wouldn't land too hard.

As after a moment the Jade broke the kiss, he couldn't face his lover.. whispering into his ear, he spoke in a tone that made it clear he had been overly nervous and needed some reassuring.

,,.. I... I was so scared that I'd hurt you.. or that you'd hate it.. I.. I want you so badly, I can't even find words.."

After being treated so well and with so much care, it only really sank in now again, as he heard those words, that his literally perfect first time choice had nothing but some book knowledge either. It was the first time since a long time that Jiang Cheng touched the older Sect Leader, as he lifted his hand and stroked through his by far longer hair.

,,Stop worrying and... Do it, Huan."

The younger one only said those few words while he reached up to get rid of his own hair accessory, just in case.. And as he turned his head back around he was greeted by those lips that were so soft and gentle, yet rough in their own way.

Lan Xichen had used the brief moment to lube himself up a bit more and only kept the kiss going for a short while this time before letting their lips part - He had to concentrate and the other had to be able to say "stop" etc in case it was needed.

After they both let out a last shaky, long breath, the older male went about positioning himself. Holding his shaft, he rather clumsily rubbed his glans against the others entrance a few times.. However, even though he had intended to always keep his eyes on his lover, as he pushed his overly sensitive tip in the wet, still extremely tight embrace - he couldn't. Lan Xichen couldn't stop his eyes from falling shut and his head from dropping slightly, his breathing hitched and as he exhaled a overwhelmed noise of pleasure escaped from him. As much as he wanted to stay calm and collected, the hand he used to prop himself up was tugging on the sheet beside the younger ones head. He even had to bite on his lower lip to get his mind clear enough to say a few words.

,,Does.. it hurt..?"

Jiang Cheng had honestly not felt the slightlest or faintest sting of pain. He had been so thoroughly widened and both of them were so lubed up - not to mention the amount his lover was leaking - even he kind of naturally knew or sensed that he would be able to take the first few centimetres without a problem. Like before it felt strangely satisfying to have come that far, probably the weirdest achievement of his life, that made him a lot more proud inside than all those he had accomplished ever in his life. However, hearing the taller males voice.. it was so audible that he was struggling with all his might to not let his mind get clouded from the pleasure he was feeling so he could keep track of him that..

,,Huan.. could you stop worrying about me for a while..? You're trying to blend out your pleasure so much, isn't that spoiling the whole point of this..? You've prepared me enough, I'm gonna be fine 'til half.. you know what I mean.. If something's off I'm gonna say so. Let go, Huan.."

The younger one couldn't simply let it go on like that. If he wanted to feel good on his own and have a simple sex toy, then he could just get himself a whore for a night as well. Lifting his hand he began to stroke through his lovers hair again around halfway through his speech.. And at the end of it, even though Lan Xichen had tried to not make it so noticeable, a shudder of pure relief went through him.

After a moment the wild god made the first thrusting motions in his clumsy virgin manner, it was a natural insinct but it really didn't have much skill behind it. It also turned out to be the truth, the tip area alone went in and out smoothly.. Lan Xichen had tried to resist, yet after around the third of his movements his mind really got taken over by a sensation that was too good to be described with words. He couldn't help but moan softly as it went unclear if he eased himself in so slowly for the other, or for his own pleasure.

They were soon both in their own, yet a combined world again,.. Jiang Cheng held onto the other, every so often glancing at him as he sooner or later began to let out pleasured noises of his own. He had felt good already before, but now seeing and hearing the genuine overwhelmed pleasure his lover was feeling freely - really just made it that much easier for him to do the same. And as guessed, as far as Lan Xichen's fingers had been able to reach, the throbbing length went in without any kind of pain or discomfort..

Even though it really wasn't necessary to go as slow as the older male did, it had its good points to it.. The jades thrusts went more skilled, they both had enough time to "fully adjust" before the rougher parts would begin.. They could also get used to each reaction and take it all in.. Which on Jiang Cheng's side for example was how the other twitched and throbbed inside of him, while they both couldn't help but feel the smaller one's muscles clench at the same time..


	42. XiCheng 39

Only when half of his length was inside of the tight cage did the wild god shift his weight back onto both of his arms. For a brief moment he looked at his lover who wasn't in that much of a better state than his own,.. then his dark eyes fell shut again as he even more slowly began to ease in the muscles that hadn't previously been prepared. His hair was hanging down, working again like a curtain between them and the world as they had done before while the purple robe hung down from him in a similar manner. Lan Xichen couldn't hear his own moans, even though they were escaping softly yet regularly.. all he heard were those of Jiang Cheng that were like music to his ears.. All he could do was feel, and what he felt was really too good to be true, it was beyond anything he had expected.

Maybe it would be different when they would switch the positions, yet the way it went now felt for this constellation perfect. How slow they went, what they had done to end up here,..

It took so long, no one would probably believe them if they'd ever tell a soul.. yet after god knew how long Lan Xichen had pulled almost all the way out and then as gently as he could pushed all the way in. He was shaking lightly and the moan he let out as his glans rubbed and twitched against the others sweet spot was like his expression full of pleasure, content and overwhelmed.

Jiang Cheng was meanwhile tugging on both the sheets and the older ones hair each time the thrusts had gone deeper,.. and as much as he had hoped for it at the beginning of their playtime, with how his lover went about it all he couldn't find a single moment of discomfort that he could later on use against his homosexual experiences. He was about to let out a moan himself, yet the breath he needed to let out in order to do so stopped once he noticed the reactions of the other. There was quite a pause in Lan Xichen's over all motions, yet due to that and even refraining from taking a breath Jiang Cheng was able to hear the others erratic heartbeat and feel how madly his insides got twitched against. Holding back a chuckle, it felt so strange yet was so much of a weird compliment at the same time that the smile that played on his lips was audible as he spoke in a tone just above a whisper.

,,Feeling that good, huh?~"

,,It feels so good.. if I would die right now, I wouldn't even mind.."

The wild god spoke up so quick and in a tone so unstable with such straightforward words that Jiang Cheng tightened around the length inside of him. They both ended up moaning in sync because of it. After that, while one blushed like mad, Lan Xichen finally lifted his head to look at his overly embarrassed speechless lover.

,,Honestly.. sorry for my way of wording but.. I'm so not going to keep that feeling from you, A-Cheng.."

Before the a tad smaller one could even figure out how he was supposed to cope with the switch in behaviour.. And even more so, what it did to his body and mind to know perfectly fine he was the only person to have seen that side of the other.. Lan Xichen already gently brushed his lips against his own, a few times before letting them meet. Whether it was a natural reflex, or true urge for it, without him realising Jiang Cheng's body moved: wrapping his arms around the others neck and legs spread a bit further while bending them some more.

It was yet another one of those slow, deep and passionate kisses that soon involved their tongues dancing with one another.. Neither of them had ever been so literally connected to anyone, but how much did they miss out in life?

After a while they began to moan into the kiss, Lan Xichen had started to move his hips. His thrusts weren't necessarily careful, he just loved the sensation of pulling almost all the way out to then thrust as deep as he could back inside in a slow overly passionate manner so much, it turned natural - or was natural for him - from the start. The amount of times he managed to tease the younger ones sweet spot grew gradually, until he did so during the first round more often than not - until he finally teased both of them each time he went back in and out. Even the way he kept the pace was for a first time almost flawless, his motions slow yet gradually quickened the tiniest amount when the way they reacted and sounded grew more desperate for it.

Jiang Cheng couldn't describe what he was feeling,.. due to the way his lover was moving he could feel each wave drown him and before it would subside the next would be ready to drown him again. As the taller one here and there broke the kiss so they both could breath, they moaned so sinfully and loudly, even when they weren't making love for so long.. Who knew what they were capable of still? While Lan Xichen heard nothing but Jiang Cheng's moans - there was no difference the other way around.. The tsundere couldn't even refrain from turning them into a knot as his legs wrapped around the Jade. Hell, he was too gone out to care, too high up in pleasure heaven to take in that sooner or later he began to pull the others hips closer in a desperate attempt to make the length caress him deeper on the inside.

Other than Lan Wangji, his older brother did turn out quite flattering and vocal the further he got lost in the pleasure. Whispering or more moaning sweet nothing's about how good the other felt, all those little things into his lovers ear. By then, even though nowhere near a next release, Lan Xichen was leaking enough for both of them to keep feeling comfortable..


	43. XiCheng 40

There was another rather striking difference between the Lan brothers: While Wangji tended to destroy whatever he got in hand once aroused, also his lover - Xichen destroyed, or damaged, whatever he got in hand but not his lover. Whenever he would lightly touch the mess underneath him, every so often to brush sweat or hair out of his face for example, he'd be so overly gentle... the blanket and so forth couldn't even dream of the same fate. They got tugged and ripped apart rather brutally. It would be interesting for Jiang Cheng to try and explain that scene later on - if anyone would dare to ask him.

The endurance Lan Xichen had however was just as incredible as that of his brother,.. He had read that a man could take long to find relief from nothing but penetration alone, yet they both were so into being one, and they had struggled so hard to get there.. that he honestly didn't want anything but such a ending, such a relief for his lover.

They were at it for a good hour, if not longer, as the smaller males behaviour slowly began to change.. His way of breathing, the way his voice sounded, even one of his arms that had stuck to being wrapped around the Jades neck disappeared only to start pawing and lightly scatching on the givers back. The next thing that happened was that not only did the clenching around Lan Xichen's throbbing length worsen, but the trembling that started ever so lightly turned after another long period of time into a bad quaking. At the same time however, Jiang Cheng completely relaxed.

|He's starting to lose the control over his body..|

While it might've seemed scary for someone with not enough knowledge, it was quite normal for a man during that kind of massage, the closer they got, to lose the control. It made the wild god feel so warm and glad inside, as he now finally let his own knot tighten somewhat further as well.. However, just as he closed his eyes and moaned against the spot on his lovers neck that he was about to tend to - Jiang Cheng spoke up in between of his moans that were slowly turning into those normal during the build-up of a overly intense release.. yet his voice sounded a little panicked, even though interrupted from moans and quavering from pleasure, the fear of the unknown was still audible.

,,Huan.. I.. that... I start to.. feel... fuck, strange.."

Lan Xichen didn't entirely stop, yet he slowed his motions down to the overly slow pace from the start, and for the first time in forever he also stopped going far enough in to actually hit the spot that was making his lover feel so "strange". After that he steadied himself on his arms and pecked his way up to whisper under his heavy breaths in such a calming and reassuring tone into the others ear.

,,You are.. getting close. Do you want.. to stop?"

The older one as close as he'd be himself, wouldn't cross a line the younger one didn't want to cross. If it was too much to go on until the end for now it would be a shame, but he would accept it.

Jiang Cheng couldn't reply instantly, his body that really didn't feel like it was his own anymore, and his overly clouded mind made it hard.. apart from that, due to how high and close he was, his body seemed to really dislike that the hits against that foreign spot had stopped - to the point where the clenching of his muscles only went worse around the length that was giving him such pleasure. At the end however, he still managed to lightly dip into his normal self, while his voice sounded nothing like it.

,,Stop..?! What did we.. fuck.. do all this shit.. for then? It's just so.. fucking.."

,,.. so fucking good..?"

Lan Xichen had almost moaned his words, he didn't care about language anymore. Maybe he would curl himself up and have a midlife crisis over that foul mouthed moment later on, but right now it was still nothing but a understatement. The reaction he got from his lover was almost a pleasured outcry, followed from more rhythmic tightening around his length that was really driving him mad inside - yet the wild god regardless spoke up again in the same tone that he used before, in pure heated honesty.

,,I feel the same... A-Cheng.. if you need to hold onto something.. cling to me.. if you want to scratch.. scratch me.. bite me... just.. let yourself fall... it's okay... I'm here.."

,,Fuck... Huan.. shut us both up..."

,,.. Mh..?"

Neither of them was talking too fluently, even between them switching who was talking and a moaning mess were a few seconds.. Not to mention that the "Mh?" Lan Xichen let out, as he lifted his head to look at his lovers from the workout sweaty and from both embarassment and that red face sounded like a deep pleasured moan. He had gone back to his already now way too favoured all the way out and in motions, slowly picking up the pace again - not that his thrusts were really quick at any point.

Jiang Cheng in turn needed a bit himself to manage both, moaning some words and to open his eyes as little as he could at the time. Honestly, the Jade looked even more outstandingly handsome from this angle with his messy hair and cheeks tinted in a light pink while his eyes.. as dark as they were, as full of love and care and.. all the good things the younger one wasn't used to - they really were full of all of that, directed at him.

,,I just... fucking felt myself.. get closer 'cause of.. the shit you said... don't make me.. freaking cum with your voice... that'd be.. freaking embarrassing.."


	44. XiCheng 41

Hearing those words from his lover really.. It hit the wild god deep enough - in a good way - to actually tense from head to toe for a few seconds, eyes closed shut. His length was as deep inside the tight cage as it was somehow possible, and twitched quite hard while leaking a drop that would save them from having to stop for lubing up. Due to different reasons, both of the men in the Nie Sect's guest room ended up moaning in pure pleasure while the younger one of them tightened around the other. After a few seconds Lan Xichen opened his eyes again and spoke up in a tone that had the faintest hint of embarrassment in it.

,,Sorry.. the imagination was a bit-"

,,Huan, I swear.. if you fucking cum before me.. if you dare to ruin my damn release now.. I'm going to rip both of your damn heads off.."

Jiang Cheng was so overcome by the pleasure and the fear of it being ruined before reaching the highest of highs that he didn't even realise that he just said he'd kill to have it - or kill if he wouldn't have it..

However, the Jade didn't exactly react the way the younger male had expected, or wanted.. He actually ended up chuckling quite the adorable one, before tilting his head and smiling the sweetest of smiles. Only Lan Xichen could see how full of pleasure and life the others lighter colored eyes were for once, how - as hard as Jiang Cheng tried - he couldn't even form a mad expression any longer. Trapped in a moment of pure awe, the older one spoke again in a honest, loving yet a little flirty tone.. At the same time he sucked everything up that there was to take in.. the hand of Jiang Cheng on his back, the other arm wrapped around his neck, while his lovers legs were tightly wrapped around him. The younger one of them was shivering, out of pure pleasure yet regardless of that - the hold on him was so strong and hadn't given him once any more space than he really needed.

,,I won't..~ The imagination of that just.. let's say we're even with what our voices could be capable of..~"

,,.. I take my statement back.. I'm not gonna kill you.. I wanna fucking die myself, right now.."

The koala bear tsundere spoke up a little too quick, and in a tone that was a tiny bit closer to how he usually sounded.. However, before Lan Xichen had spoken up and would hit him even deeper with another wave of words.. Jiang Cheng could also not deny how it all felt, that he took it all in.. How their bodies were so tightly pressed together, his own heartbeat ringing loudly in his ears, the overwhelming amount of pleasure.. But most of all, he felt so incredibly alive and for once not alone.

Lan Xichen didn't feel overly impressed, even though his lips formed the smallest of pouts possible,.. At the end, he leaned in to his lovers lips and brushed his own against them before lifting his head.. Just as he had guessed, Jiang Cheng had ached for a kiss and instantly tried to react naturally to it. However, before giving in he spoke in a shaky tone while picking up the thrusting motions with his hips again - which caused the other to space out and moan, just like the wild god himself.

,,.. A-Cheng.. do you really want that..? We're both feeling so good right now... I can barely wait for us to.. change the positions... The way you react.. doesn't it make you feel the same.. further excitement..? Seeing what I do.. feeling what I do.. hearing what I do... Imagining you making me feel.. how you do right now... taking in the view you have on me,.. the other way around.... It gives me so much more pleasure.. Am I the only one aching for that..?"

Jiang Cheng couldn't reply with any words, all he could do was tense and moan loudly in response. Neither of them had expected that the older one would let go of his restraint to the extent that his words would bring them so much closer to finding relief, yet it happened.

The smaller leaders hand that was formerly only pawing on the Jades back began to scratch and dig into the light colored skin, his legs pulling the others hips harder towards his own, so his sweet spot would get hit even more roughly. They were both melting away like ice cream in the heat and also making around the same amount of a mess.

It would be a miracle at this point if no one would've heard them, even though no one would probably correctly guess who the pleasured loud moans truly belonged to. The entire room was filled with their scents combining, the sounds of skin slapping against skin and the wetness between them were turning it all into the most lustful and dirty of concerts.

After letting out a curse that Jiang Cheng could somehow categorise was volume wise getting out of control, he pulled the wild god's head down so their lips finally crushed together. It was the first time that a kiss between them was nothing but a pure mess.. well, they were as well but.. their lips were a little all over the place, they couldn't even really use their tongues due to all the moaning and the entire point of the kiss being to muffle them was.. not on the list of things they achieved with it. In short, it was one of the rare times where their inexperience really came through uncensored.


	45. XiCheng 42

In comparison to how much of a mess they were, within the next.. maybe 20 minutes, it all just went gradually worse and worse the closer they got. Lan Xichen who had sticked to his beloved all the way motions, stopped doing so short after the kiss had started.. not only did the change help his lover get closer, his oversensitive glans that rubbed and hit the sweet spot now way more frequently, and in shorter time was making him see stars as well. It could very well be that his back would look like a mess later on, yet even though he wasn't a fan of pain - in such a context it also only contributed to the tightening of his knot.

Everything only went more and more erratic, whether it be their moans that further rose in volume, their breathing and heartbeats - or even the tightening of Jiang Cheng's muscles and in turn the twitching of the Jades throbbing and leaking length. All few moments they would need to break the kiss to try and get some air into their lungs which Lan Xichen would use to stare at his lover, or whisper something sweet, sometimes just to peck a spot on his face. Neither of them had ever felt such a intensity of a build up.. one that came so slow, yet at the same time way too quick - it was truly an addictive way of being with another person.

It wasn't until the younger one lost almost all of the control over his body to the lust, shaking and in stronger waves coming tension that the slight fear reappeared in his lighter colored eyes. Whether Lan Xichen had waited for it, or sensed it, was unclear - yet he looked up and smiled at his lover.. His smile was both a reassuring one while at the same time a confirmation that he was about to reach the highest high himself. Their bodies ended up moving in sync, while Jiang Cheng pulled the wild god closer with his last bit of strength to hide against his neck - The Jades right hand had moved and got placed on the back of the younger ones head to hold him in place, and give him the bit more of closeness that he needed.

,,I'm here.. let's let go.. together.."

Lan Xichen's voice was so full of care and love and gentleness, even though he sounded entirely breathless and audibly only a few more thrusting motions away. The younger one couldn't reply, the only thing he could do was nod faintly against the neck he was moaning against like he had gone mad.

As guessed, Jiang Cheng was the first to reach his climax, his entire body tensed and as another hit to his sweet spot caused the first wave of liquid to get spilled all over them both.. He ended up ripping his lovers knot that was just there as well with moaning in such a overwhelmed and pleasured manner that it sounded almost choked.

,,Fuck.. Huan.."

,,A-Cheng.."

The wild god replied not even a second later, in the same tone - as his own body tensed for a second or two, too much for him to be able to move. Like his lovers, his eyes were closed shut, mouth open and while the muscles kept contracting around his length Lan Xichen then continued to ride out their pleasure for both of them.

Neither of them had thought that it could feel any better, than it had done until their knots ripped.. However, as now the release of the older one filled the tight cage and leaked out in between of his natural desperate attempts to push it in deeper.. Everything went so much tighter, so much more slippery and intense.

Jiang Cheng would've probably at least flinched as his body got filled with the seed of his lover, yet the added pressure he got with each hit to his sweet spot caused more and more of his own liquid to get spilled all over them both. It wasn't the same sensation as a normal release, it was different yet so much better. It lasted way longer, spread so much further all over his body,..

They spend a few minutes riding out and indulging in the pleasure they had worked so hard for.. Both choking and moaning, tensing and spilling without any sense for time or place left. At the end, it was the older one of them that sooner or later began to slow down his thrusts. For a bit he went back to his beloved all the way motions before he stopped while his length was wrapped up from his smaller lover entirely.

A bit more time passed, even as the relief of this round had left their systems.. it was a first time, the rush of it subsided terribly slowly and had taken them over so deeply. They were both shaking, trying to collect themselves or at least stabilise their breathing since the hearts.. they wouldn't be calmed so easily.

The first to move was Jiang Cheng, or well.. His muscles had relaxed so far that the legs that had wrapped around the Jade slowly sank down on the bed. A moment later he took away the hand from the others back - that was probably going to look like Lan Xichen had fought with a wild cat of some sort already now. He didn't pull the hand entirely away though, instead he placed it on his lovers lower back and after a few more moments Jiang Cheng rested his head back - his face had been hid against the others neck until then.

Lan Xichen only reluctantly let go of the back of the slightly smaller males head, yet he did so and shifted his weight back on both of his by the robe covered arms, that also felt rather strengthless. He couldn't really help but stare down at the Jiang Sect leaders face, just mentioned one was holding his eyes closed in a peaceful looking manner, regardless of it being red and sweaty.


	46. XiCheng 43

Jiang Cheng's mind was only slowly beginning to work again, somewhat at least.. The next two things he could feel were: An ever so gentle touch on his cheek, at first only placed there but soon the back of his lovers fingers were stroking over it.. followed from something wet that dripped on his face that caused him to blink. After blinking maybe twice he looked up in a bit of confusion, only to see the Jade's gaze fixed on him with so much love and care in his dark eyes that it was overwhelming.. However, as he scanned his face the second time, apart from the redness and the sweat all over the handsome features that were completed by a little soft and sweet smile.. the eyes of Lan Xichen shimmered a lot more than before. With a bit of hesitation and in a really rough sounding tone, the younger one then spoke up.

,,You... Are you crying..?"

The Jade's motions stopped, if possible his blush went a little darker as he shifted his weight back on both of his arms. Even though he had noticed that his sight was a little blurry, he hadn't taken in that the tears had dropped and looked up for a moment while clearing his throat. As he looked back down the taller one of them spoke in a just as rough sounding after climax voice with a bit of an embarrassed hint in it.

,,.. Sorry.. I.."

,,Forget it.. It actually suits you quite a lot."

As Jiang Cheng had noticed the others awkwardness he interrupted him, his speech was quite broken into pieces anyway. His words slipped out between his lips rather easily and in a quite reassuring tone, yet he couldn't help but raise his brows in a provocative manner - while the wild god in turn couldn't help but let out a awkward chuckle.

,,I'm just going to.."

The older one spoke up again short after while further shifting his weight and slowly pulled out. They both shivered as his length left the warm, filled to the brim cage and moaned a soft one in sync. Then he leaned in, brushed his lips against those of the male born in Yunmeng and kissed him softly - as the other didn't fight back, Lan Xichen kept it going for a while before pulling away and leaning in to his ear to whisper in a low, a little worried yet gentle tone.

,,.. Are you alright..?"

This time Jiang Cheng was the one to let out a chuckle like noise as he wrapped his arms - voluntarily this time - around the others neck before speaking in a matching tone.

,,In which way?"

,,..... your body.."

,,Honestly, you let yourself go so much towards the end, I'm not sure."

Jiang Cheng only intended for it to be a simple tease, yet with how quick the wild god's head shot up and his expression showing panic and guilt.. it was slightly amusing yet left him feeling guilty enough to smile a little and speak in a more reassuring, teasing tone.

,,You know what a joke is, don't you? Huan, you took so much time with all of that at the start that as much as I want to find something to rip you apart with right now.. I didn't feel a damn sting of pain even once. The part you couldn't prepare felt a bit uncomfortable, but you controlled it all so well there's nothing I can say really.. Apart from the fact that the weight I just lost, you made sure to fill it back up."

To the younger leaders half-surprise the Jade almost collapsed in a different kind of relief this time on him, even letting out a sentence that sounded almost like he was whining.

,,Don't scare me like that, A-Cheng!"

,,Who's the one that's supposed to be scared here? What do you think how I felt when you suddenly opened your mouth to let out nothing but shameless words? You even used the phrase "fucking good", and you're the one who's scared here?"

The older one of them could only stutter a few inaudible things while paling at once, stuttering more audibly then in a totally flustered tone.

,,I.. I said that.."

,,You did and you didn't only say something like that once-.... Oh fuck, don't move so much and abruptly all the time!"

Jiang Cheng hadn't even been halfway through what he wanted to say as his lover pretty much slammed his head against his chest, causing both to let out a slightly pained groan. The younger one then raised his voice a little afterwards once he could speak again while the Jade went into hiding, like a turtle.

,,I have and hate to say that, hearing you say all that shit was quite the turn on. If you're nice, I might not let anyone spread rumours about your foul mouthed self later on.~"

,,Y-You.."

The turtles head shot back up, it was far too adorable how he reacted, yet Jiang Cheng kept his pokerface on. Not like he wouldn't be the type to spread a rumour if he felt like it, but how the hell was he supposed to explain how he got such an idea anyway?

,,You think I wouldn't do it?~"

Lan Xichen's expression distorted in horror, it was really far too entertaining how little his head was cooperating to believe such a thing.. However, this time the younger sect leader slightly burst out laughing.

,,Calm down, think about it: How the hell could I spread such a rumour without making myself look weird as hell as well?"

The Jade blinked, he really only got it now and let out a far too heavy, relieved breath while his head dropped somewhat. Only after a lot of debating and hesitating did he then dare to ask the one question that he couldn't get out of his mind, in a low, slightly curious yet shy tone.

,,.. So... How does it.. How does it feel..?"

,,Give me a few minutes and I'll show you.~"

Jiang Cheng's reply came so quick, dry and in such a dirty tone that the taller male looked up in almost a state of shock from it.. He didn't know how to respond, especially because of that devilish smirk that was playing on his lovers lips - not to mention the perfectly matching glimmer in his lighter colored eyes.


	47. XiCheng 44

,,Why are you looking at me as if I just said that I'm going to kill you and rip apart your corps?"

The younger one asked while using a tone as innocent as he could manage - with his expression not changing one bit.

,,... Because you kind of look at me like that A-Cheng.."

Lan Xichen couldn't help but speak the truth, yet that in turn only caused the others aura to darken some further.. before he cracked up and said in between of his laughter.

,,I'm gonna try to be nice, alright? I probably won't be as overbearing as you are with it all, but well. Now do me the favour and freaking move, I'd like to shut my legs."

It was slowly getting a little awkward for the one born in Yunmeng to lay there like that after the flow of the moment was gone. He was neither sure if he could ever do such a thing again - nor if he would be able to completely go his life long without what he had felt the past.. god knew how long.

The wild god's eyes widened in realisation as he rather clumsily yet quickly sat up.. and looked around, only to let out a noise that was like his expression once again full of pure horror and shock.

,,What?"

Jiang Cheng asked automatically, he would've looked around himself but as promising as his speech had been - he really didn't feel like he could move a lot already.

,,... I.... You have to know that.. I'm rather clumsy when it comes to handling anything that is related to cloth..."

,,Not like that's much of a problem right now, is it?"

,,.. I'm afraid that I have to say that your sheets may think otherwise.."

The older one of them sounded completely guilty and spaced out as he stared from one spot beside his lovers head to the other.. then he got hesitantly up from between Jiang Cheng's legs and sat down beside him - only to hold up a piece that was more than likely formerly attached to the sheets.

As he turned his head, Jiang Cheng was between shocked and amused. He hadn't fully believed this entire strength story from before, but well..

,,Still waters truly run deep, huh? How the hell am I supposed to explain that? Wanna keep it as a trophy of some kind, pervert?"

Hearing the word pervert directed at him, the Jade's eyes widened as he stared at the other, mouth opening with no word coming out. However, he didn't really need to find words at the end because as the tsundere crossed one leg over the other.. Just mentioned one ended up letting out a noise that was impossible to categorise as surprise, moan, weirded out,.. The older male could just see Jiang Cheng tense and shut his eyes, which caused him to speak up in slight worry.

,,What's wrong? Didn't you say you were fine before, A-Cheng?"

,,It fucking moved."

,,.. What..?"

The only response Lan Xichen got at first after being confused from his lovers vague, nothing telling statement was.. a slight glare, followed from a glance of Jiang Cheng down to at first the wild god's and then the middle of his own body. As the Jade still didn't seem to get it the a tad smaller one spoke up in a tone that was sounding a lot more like himself again.

,,Your shit.. Already forgot that you just released inside, or what?"

,,Oh."

,,Don't freaking "oh" around and go get something to wipe us down with already. It's your turn, I got the drinks last time."

Regardless of the fact that the Jiang Sect's leader had sounded rather harsh at first but a tad more calm and relaxed towards the end, the Jade was still.. himself, as he spoke up in a awkward tone while fiddling with the cloth without moving just yet.

,,I.. I'm sorry.. I didn't even ask-"

,,Honestly, let's stop the apologising already when it comes to all the stuff where it's not necessary. I told you to let go and I didn't say you couldn't either, did I? Apart from that, let's be real for a second I've got that harsh foul mouth of mine, don't mind each word I say.. And also, I wouldn't have pulled out either, it's not like it's needed between men.. it's just... it feels so weird. Now go and get us something to wipe us down with, aren't you Lan Sect, neat freak hella uncomfortable right now?"

Hearing those words Lan Xichen's tension vanished somewhat, the others tone had changed to the more gentle one that he had used after slapping himself - regardless of his way of wording things still being the entire opposite of this. And so, after letting out a soft breath, he got up from the bed, wrapped the robe somewhat around himself again and walked away. The piece of fabric was resting on the spot the Jade had sat on.

In truth, even though the younger male had spoken up in the first moment of "movement" rather harsh.. Once he was alone, it did feel overly strange, yet he couldn't deny that at the time where the other released inside of him as he was on his high himself.. It had made everything weirdly complete, and the warmth inside of him still lingered like the aftermath of it all.

In the meantime where his lover was gone, Jiang Cheng was running a few things through his mind.. He had just experienced and lost so many first times,.. yet even though that was the case, and even though he truly ached for the role reversal.. It made him nervous. How was a guy like him: rough, clumsy and foul mouthed as anything supposed to do something even the tiniest bit alike? Should he just do the entire same routine? Would he even be able to be as steadfast as the other..? Honestly, he doubted it - just like he doubted that he should be the one to deflower the perfect Jade. Staring at the ceiling, Jiang Cheng had rested his head back on his arm as he spaced out into his own world.


	48. XiCheng 45

Lan Xichen was a little spaced out himself as he had walked around to get the water to boil. After that he had taken a short toilet break himself before.. Well, let's just say the words of his lover and the realisation that they had just experienced so many first times of one another with each other.. The Jade ended up crouching down, covering his face with his hands he only calmed with the help of one of his sect's special techniques.

As he went about pouring water and soap in the bowl before adding a cloth.. The older one wasn't as nervous as unknown to him the other was. There were faint hints of "What is he going to do?" and all of that running through his head, after all Lan Xichen didn't have a complete overview yet over how the a tad smaller male would be as.. especially after what he had done to him as well. However, he had gone in with a different mindset from the beginning - it had always been clear for the wild god that whatever Jiang Cheng would let him do, he'd embrace it as well.. which was quite literal at this point in time.

With that being said, letting out a last heavy breath Lan Xichen then made his way back into the bedroom. The younger one didn't really react to his arrival with movement, yet it was slightly visible that he had spaced out a little. Lan Xichen then put the bowl on something similiar to a nighstand before hesitantly speaking up in his gentle, sweet tone - that still sounded a little strained from all the workout.

,,Do you want to drink something?"

,,.. Mmh, why not."

The one on the bed replied semi quickly, yet not in a rushed tone and as Lan Xichen walked away to grab one of the remaining jar's.. He could hear his lover let out another one of those weirded out, yet strangely aroused noises from before - and as he had guessed, once he came back the other sect leader had sat up. It wasn't necessary to ask what happened after the prior incident.

,,There."

As Jiang Cheng sat there on the bed, trying to adjust still to the foreign sensation of the others liquid that remained inside of him.. He looked up as the taller male held a cup with liquor in it in his direction and took it with a small hum as a "thanks". The one born in Yunmeng then spoke once the Jade had sat down in a casual like tone, that had a teasing hint to it after taking a sip of his drink.

,,I'm honestly surprised that you dind't try to start wiping me down yet. Shouldn't you be aching more for getting rid of the mess, Huan?"

The older male chuckled softly before replying in an honest tone that surprised his lover enough to stop midway in leaning over to refill his cup.

,,It's honestly rather refreshing.. Other than my brother, I have always known that there are rules that are necessary, as well as those that aren't. One of the reasons why I agreed to come here and convinced the others as well was because.. I want to see for myself what an impact even simple things that are normal for others could have on our Sect. At what point does strictness erase humanity..? I've just.. come to question so many things.."

Jiang Cheng hesitated, he was rather unsure if he should meddle with the Lan Sect's affairs.. while at the same time.. Was he really the right person to talk to when it came to being human? He understood the seriousness of the topic, that it wasn't only one that Lan Xichen had to think about - but also he himself for himself and also his own sect. At the end he spoke for the first time since forever like an actual leader of a sect, that put thought into his words.

,,Even though I'm unsure if I can reply to that.. I think I get why you're talking so openly to me about those matters. We both need to think about how things should run, or develope for a different future.. I can't really talk about your sect, but even though it's been so many years at this point.. I can say that my mother's cruel, or overly harsh ways have never contributed to the strength of our cultivators. At the same time, my father was far too mild and it was as if there were no rules at all. I think both of our sects are too far from it at this point, yet there has to be something found.. like a middle between what your sect does, and the vision my father had."

The older one of them was also surprised that Jiang Cheng actually considered truly contributing to the conversation, it was audible that if even just now - he had put some thought into it. At the end Lan Xichen looked at the other in both a speechless, but also proud way,.. while it was clear that there had popped something up in his mind, yet due to the intense stare he was directing at Jiang Cheng.. Well, just mentioned male felt kinda embarrassed and automatically glared while saying in his normal tsundere tone.

,,What?! Got a problem?"

As he heard those words the wild god snapped out of it. Tilting his head he smiled so sweetly before speaking in a tone to match.

,,No,.. I just had to think about how you acted when you first came to Gusu.. and how you were when you took over your sect,.. how you were the last years.. Right now, where you're neither full of rage, nor hatred.. I was just a little bit taken aback by how much you looked and spoke like a true Sect Leader. I truly hope that you will show this side of yourself more often from now on, A-Cheng."


	49. XiCheng 46

Jiang Cheng, who was staring at the Jade wide eyed flushed in a dark shade of pink. He was flustered at anything from those words, especially since it was the first time that someone actually complimented him as a sect leader. After stummering for a few moments, he acted exactly like his nephew with the way he looked away and let out a simple

,,Bullshit."

The wild god could only watch in amusement before letting out a sigh while rolling his darker colored eyes. He hadn't taken a sip from his cup that he held in his hands yet and stared down at the clear liquid.. Even though he had been debating about if he should go so far or not, at the end Lan Xichen spoke up subconsciously.

,,A-Cheng.. If you don't fall back, if you keep walking the path that we've just spoken about.. I think you're going to make your parents proud, truly proud. You can turn into a leader that is worthy of praise, worthy of wearing the robes of your sect.. even though you had lost your way."

Neither of them said another word for a while.. Lan Xichen could only see out of the corners of his eyes, due to not having looked up again that the younger ones free hand had wiped quickly over his face. As Jiang Cheng spoke up, once minutes had passed, his voice was low and barely audible.. as well as a little bit husky in sound.

,,What nonsense are you throwing around here out of nowhere.. Not like I needed to hear that.."

This time even though he didn't truly admit it, Lan Xichen smiled as he looked down at his cup.. After a moment he said in a low tone that made it clear he had understood, but was giving in.

,,Alright. Then, if you wish you can act as if I never said it."

Instead of replying, Jiang Cheng drowned the alcohol in his cup before taking and wringing out the cloth. The water it laid in was already starting to cool down a little again. Out of reflex to try and conceal the little something that had formed in his eyes and rolled down on his cheeks he wiped the cloth rather roughly over his face. At the time the Jade glanced at him in silence while taking little sips of his own cup.

,,Don't you dare think I forgot everything you said though, Huan."

Another few minutes had passed during which neither of them had said a word, the older one had by then also finished his cup and put it aside.. He almost got startled a little as the silence suddenly got broken, but more so because of how.. harsh the younger males voice had sounded. Lan Xichen only calmed down again as he looked up, only to see Jiang Cheng who had turned towards him with the cloth in his hand that he had used to wipe himself down.. well, not at all spots of his body. The smaller sect leaders face showed more of a gentle expression, it even reached his eyes which honestly made him look extremely handsome.

,,Huan, come here. Let me wipe you down."

It only made click in the Jade's head after a moment,.. The entire vibe of the situation, the look on his lovers face,.. - Role Reversal. Lan Xichen then began to move, he wasn't really hesitant but a little nervous and somewhat shy. The older one ended up back in a similiar position to when he received the blowjob, facing Jiang Cheng he sat with his legs stretched out while propping himself up on his hands - or arms - that were slightly behind him. Jiang Cheng in turn changed his position so that his feet were on the ground, upper body turned towards his lover and in general they were close enough that if the Jade would really sit up they could easily kiss.

,,Are you scared?"

The younger one asked in a low, concentrated sounding tone as he stared at the spot on Lan Xichen's toned upper body that he was wiping down gently. To his surprise the one dressed in his sect's colors spoke up shyly, yet with almost no hesitation.

,,No,.. not really. But.. to be fair,.. I'm going in with a different mindset, than the one you had.."

,,Whatever your lover let's you do, is how much you'll let them do?"

Jiang Cheng glanced up, only to see the older ones slightly flustered expression before he went on to refresh the cloth.

,,.. I told you, didn't I?"

,,Then.. do you actually want it, or is it just reaping what you've sown?"

In comparison to how the younger one had been, the wild god was really terribly calm, his breathing soft and steady and expression flustered and flushed, but relaxed.

,,Do you think I would've been able to lie in the state I was in, when I said what I did?"

Jiang Cheng chuckled, recalling how the collected one had moaned how much he craved for the role reversal.

,,No, I don't think so.. However, asking you a few things is the least I can do.. since honestly, I don't know if I can pull through it all the same way you did."

,,I don't really expect you to, A-Cheng."

Lan Xichen replied as his left hand had naturally raised to stroke in a comforting manner over his lovers cheek which in turn made the virgin flush a light shade of pink himself. Jiang Cheng was honestly glad that he just completed the wiping down task so he could break the embarrassing moment without turning it awkward..

The taller male had understood regardless and steadied himself back on both of his arms. As his lover turned again however, just mentioned one slowly leaned in to his lips.. yet just like Lan Xichen had teased, it was now the others turn to do so with simply brushing them together before letting them meet for a exciting yet painfully short while. Neither changed their position, and even though the kiss stopped Jiang Cheng only pulled away enough to be able to talk in a low, a little dirty tone.

,,Huan,.. can you explain how it's possible that even after all of that.. I feel so damn horny for more? I feel totally relaxed, but I crave for it anyway still."

Breaking the stare for a moment the wild god ran his book knowledge through his mind before speaking in a weirdly reassuring tone.

,,As far as I recall, it was mentioned in the books that it's rather normal.. that even if you find that kind of relief, you will.. crave a normal one regardless still to fully calm down."

Jiang Cheng's expression turned for a brief moment into a "Ah.".. he was half interested in actual enlightenment and half.. it had been a terrible try to flirt - how he now realised.


	50. XiCheng 47

,,Or it's simply because you're fucking tempting when you want to be, Huan."

Lan Xichen was so overwhelmed from this sudden compliment that he actually felt like covering himself with something more than the untied robe. His jaw had dropped a little and it didn't make anything better that the younger one of them looked far too pleased because of it.

,,Honestly, I don't know what to do with you, Huan.. There's so much dirty stuff running through my head.. half of it I guess we're not experienced enough for and the other half... Let's just say I think your clean soul wouldn't be overly into it."

It was definitely an experience the Jade hadn't known he needed: to feel weirdly aroused, confused and worried at the same time. Only after a few seconds did he manage to speak up in a matching tone with far too much hesitation being visible on his face.

,,W-... What.. I'm unsure if I want to ask right now.."

Jiang Cheng let out a chuckle, without giving a response at first he leaned in and lightly nibbled on his lovers neck - just to tease him some further. As hoped, the taller males breathing hitched and when he looked back up Lan Xichen's eyes just opened again.

,,Oh, Huan.. isn't it more like you don't want to hear it and rather feel it?~"

Getting hit by one equally as dirty as flirty attack after another really got the wild god to be a tamed god, to the point where he could only swallow without getting out a word.. And so the younger male continued..

,,On a more serious note.. Is there anything you'd like me to do, or leave out? Just asking 'cause with your worry about restraint and all.. Would you be comfortable trying out the position you used on me from the start, or would you rather try another one first to see how you'll react to it all.. Ya know, strength and all."

Lan Xichen had began to understand what his lover was trying to say around halfway through the speech. With how the younger one had clung to him, lost control and so forth it could be that the Jade would be the same - if not worse. Just to make sure he spoke up in a tone that made it audible that he appreciated the thought the other had put into it all.

,,If I understood you correctly,.. you're trying to ask if I would be able to let go the way you did.. without knowing how much control I might have left over myself?"

Jiang Cheng simply nodded in response. - The wild god hesitated, he honestly hadn't even thought about such a matter himself.

,.. I'm a lot more relaxed than you were.. so I don't think I'd struggle as much with adjusting.. however, that logically also means I'd probably lose track earlier.. Now that I think about it.. I think I'd be a lot more tense and try to restrain myself a lot further if.. we start of with a position where I could possibly harm you while my mind is as clear as it is now still.. but.."

,,But you don't really feel too well with getting deflowered in a different position with less closeness either."

The younger one had listened in silence, yet attentively. He only spoke up when he knew what the other was about to say and continued to talk in his calm, understanding yet still dirty tone after seeing Lan Xichen's shy little nod.

,,Don't worry, Huan.. Like you guessed, I know how it all feels.. before when you got yourself off, I didn't know as much as I do now.. I would've probably just shoved my cock in and fucked you hard.. but as much of an ass I might be, it's all so fresh and lingering still that I wouldn't be able to leave you hanging there in a position where I probably would've run as well. As prepared as you might think you'd be, when it's really going down you'll probably still feel like clinging to somoeone and so on... Apart from that, as much as I want to fuck you from behind and slam my hand on your ass,.. right now watching you cum and giving you the view you wanted sounds far too tempting to resist, my dear Huan.~"

Everything Jiang Cheng said after the "Apart from that" was a devilishly seductive whisper, accompanied by a smirk to match while he stared into his lovers eyes. It was the most amusing, yet arousing of scenes once again.. How the virgin Jade came out, so sensitive that just from mere words his breathing grew heavy, lips parted and trembling lightly while his cheeks went a tad pinker again. The younger male couldn't say for sure, whether it was his or Lan Xichen's heartbeat, yet he could swear he heard a loud thumping.. While both of them had just so calmed down below the belt, this entire dirty talk session really hadn't helped much to keep them this way..

Using the moment where the tension was still lingering the smaller sect leader reached out, placing his hand on the others nape he leaned in and started a kiss that.. was clearly with him being the lead of it, it wasn't the light kind of devouring that Lan Xichen had lead, it was deep and soft and gentle, but with a rougher underline. They were really like day and night, or ying and yang. Jiang Cheng kept it going like that for a while, not giving his lover the tongue dance he clearly soon began to crave.. at the end, he pulled away, leaned in to the tamed god's ear and whispered so seductively that it made his lover shiver. It was a clear, yet gentle command.

,,Huan.. Be good and sit in the middle of the bed, don't ask.. If you don't like something, say so.. turn your back towards me, face to the pillows and close those pretty eyes of yours, alright?~"


	51. XiCheng 48

This time, even after Jiang Cheng had sat back up properly.. Lan Xichen was a huge ball of hesitation. He only realised now how embarrassed and strange the other must've felt, yet recalling that at the end caused him to move. As told the older male changed his position so that he was sitting in the middle of the bed, facing the wall at the upper end of it. He was like before, sitting seiza style with his hands resting on his tighs.. after a moment more of hesitating he then closed his darker colored eyes. Even if he appeared calm, Lan Xichen was nervous, yet still weirdly catched from the entire vibe that went on between them.

The smaller Sect Leader was meanwhile staring at him while sitting motionless himself.. Not only to give them each some time, but also to study how the other looked, just so he could make out more easily later on if anything was off. Only when the Jade had noticeably calmed did Jiang Cheng move: Getting up from the bed, he walked around and climbed back up so that he was sitting the same way as his lover - just behind him. Their height difference wasn't too immense, yet as the younger one glanced up and down the others back it appeared to be of used for once.

,,Take the robe off for now."

Even though there was clear dominance going out from the Jiang Sect leader, it wasn't the choking to death way.. He was lightly pushing Lan Xichen in a certain direction, but not forcing him to, nor was there time pressure audible in his tone. His stare was rather intense, chewing on his lower lip after licking over it as his lover followed his command. The natural majestic vibe of the Lan Sect made it that tad better, to the point where Jiang Cheng had regretted not letting the other take it off while standing.

,,Don't be nervous.. You've been all over me by now.. treated me so gently.. now look at what I've done to your back in return.. I'm just going to give your backside some attention before flipping you over and filling you up..~"

The Jade tensed, Jiang Cheng had leaned in to his neck after brushing his hair over his shoulder so half of his neck and nape were free.. and whispered each of his word against Lan Xichen's skin in between of the lightest of brushing against it with his lips. The sound of the younger one's voice was so irritably gentle, yet dirty at the same time that for a terribly brief moment the Lan Sect leader questioned how they were supposed to cope with listening to one another normally if they continued like that. However, the next thing he felt were Jiang Cheng's somewhat rough hands gently caressing his thighs.

,,Where-"

,,Zidian..? I already took him off minutes ago, didn't notice it?"

It had only sank in after the smaller male stopped talking that the coldness that usually was present whenever Jiang Cheng touched him.. wasn't there. As confusing as it was to Lan Xichen, his lover had spoken up naturally in a reassuring tone.

,,I told you I already had an accident 'cause of him once, don't wanna let it happen now - do we? Your breathing is already getting so heavy now.. are you that excited, Huan..?~"

,,I.. The way you talk.."

Jiang Cheng let out an amused, soft breath against the older one's skin. It felt strange to be in control over the other, yet it was just as intoxicating - if not more. For a bit he let the silence linger, placing the first light and gentle pecks on the taller males neck, down his shoulder and back up while his hands kept caressing those fine thighs of his.


	52. XiCheng 49

,,Is it my voice.. or my way of talking..?~"

After a while of teasing in silence with nothing but the pecks and soft breaths being audible, Jiang Cheng broke it in the same tone from before: dirty, yet gentle and dominating.

,,.. I... Both..?"

Lan Xichen could only reply in a tone that was questioning if he had that option as well, to which his lover only replied with a "Oh~" like noise. The next thing the younger one did before saying more was lightly nibble on a spot on the Jade's nape that seemed to be rather sensitive.. which got further confirmed from the soft wave of pleasured tension that went through the tamed god.

,,Well.. It's foreign for you after all.. getting talked to and viewed that way.. it's like something forbidden that ends up being quite the thrill.. I didn't think out of all the people on earth.. that you'd be so into dirty talk, Huan..~"

,,As you said earlier.. still waters run deep.. Regardless of restraint and rules.. I'm still nothing but a man.."

,,And you've got quite the nice ass for a man, I must say..~"

Just like Jiang Cheng before, now his lover sounded as if he was getting a little massage.. his tone between spaced out and overly relaxed. However, after the Jade had spoken up, one of the younger males hands had disappeared and.. as he said what he did about Lan Xichen's ass that was quite the well formed one at that, Jiang Cheng gently rubbed over one of those meaty cheeks before cupping it with his hand and tending to it. It hadn't been planned, yet the sensation was so new to the tamed god that he leaned forward a little while letting out a heavy breath.

It saved the younger one of them the breath of telling the other to do so, at least for a while.

,,Huan.. tell me honestly.. Has anyone other than your family ever seen your actual figure without like 20 types of layer above..? You're so well trained, aren't your Lan girls going crazy over you..?"

The Jade had a bit of trouble replying to most that the a tad smaller one tried to lure out of him, because each time the other had finished his sentence he went back to teasing the now wider area he could reach with his mouth. In between Jiang Cheng's hand that wasn't tending to the tamed god's ass brushed over Lan Xichen's length.. but only to end up trailing over the toned chest downwards to his just as trained stomach.

,,.. Women and man are usually, mostly,.. seperated.."

,,Mmh..? Ah, I remember now.. even the youngest of children were only boys where we were at.. Bad for you and them.. but good for me I guess.."

Jiang Cheng was rather engrossed in his little game, currently teasing a spot between the older leaders shoulders where his spine was with his lips and then for a second with the tip of his tongue. There was a shiver running down all over Lan Xichen's body, which in turn only caused the other to blow some air on the wet spot to make history repeat itself.

,,Are you cold..?"

Even though the younger one of them asked rather seriously, the question really wasn't - they both knew perfectly fine what.. or more, who had caused the reaction.

,,What's the point of this, A-Cheng..?"

,,Of what?~"

The tamed god hadn't fought back even once until then.. That didn't mean though that he wasn't questioning what the purpose of it all was. As his lover answered his question with another one Lan Xichen's expression was something between a pout and a frown.. Speaking up again in between of his heavy breaths and the teasing from so many spots, his tone was rather neutral.

,,The position,.. the way you treat me.. I've already told you I'm quite relaxed, so it's not necessary to that extent.."

,,Selfish reasons, I guess.. On one side I just really enjoy teasing you right now.. on the other, I honestly need some time longer to get over the last round.. and.."

For the first time in forever Jiang Cheng actually hesitated in his speech, which caught the taller males attention.. After waiting for a moment Lan Xichen poked at it, in a bit of a curious tone this time.

,,And..?"

Another soft breath that sounded like a chuckle left the Jiang Sect leaders lips, speaking in a more gentle and honest than dirty or dominant tone.

,,I'm fighting against something since quite a while.. call it an urge or an imagination.. and before you ask why.. Huan, I'm honestly a lot more dirty minded than you are. Maybe not on the receiving end, but as the giver I'm open to a lot more than you are.. If I'd just do what I want, or even if I'd just tell you, you'd probably die from a heart attack."

Once the revelation of the smaller male had reached it's end Lan Xichen slowly turned, which caused his lover to stop the teasing. The expression Jiang Cheng showed was a bit of a "?", while at the same time the top aura remained around him - the Jade was simply looking a bit confused.

,,What? Who said you could turn around?"

,,What you want to do can't be that horrible that I'd run after all we did already - can it?"

,,For me, at the moment no. For you though.. Hey, I'm trying to control myself here stop looking at me with those huge eyes of yours that show more and more interest in it!"

Jiang Cheng tried to do both, scold his imagination and the tamed god at the same time.. However, he didn't quite hit as deep as he had wanted to with his words when it came to either.

,,Would you let me do it to you?"

Once he heard that question from Lan Xichen, the younger one hesitated.. At the end he replied in a rather matching tone.

,,Out of the blue? I don't think so.. If I'd be in the state from before.. I honestly think curiosity would get the best of me. Especially since you've planted your shit "what you do you have to accept the other way around as well" in my head."

Jiang Cheng rolled his eyes, yet all his lover did was stare at him for a few seconds longer.. before turning back around and saying in a rather determined tone.

,,Then.. A-Cheng.. Honestly, after how much we already did.. Let's not go back to that much restraint now, as long as it's really something that.. disturbing that it would injure either of us. What are you thinking about? Do you need me to do something?"


	53. XiCheng 50

,,Bend over so that you're on your knees, keep your ass in my direction."

The imagination had began to sound so much more tempting the longer he had it, that combined with what his lover said.. Before he could stop himself the words had slipped out in a tone so dirty, yet full of want for it that once it sank in Jiang Cheng almost slapped his hand over his mouth. Just like he had guessed, Lan Xichen tensed and neither moved an inch nor said a word.

It was the truth that the tamed god had ended up frozen in place. The way the others voice had sounded, the words in itself, the position he was supposed to switch to.. He needed a bit to process all of it, yet just as he was about to move, Jiang Cheng spoke again in a hurry.

,,Just forget that I said that out loud.. Everything combining, my head wasn't working properly..-"

,,A-Cheng.. I just froze because of how sudden the reply came and also.. I didn't imagine myself in that position yet.. Which I can't say when it comes to reversed positions."

The younger one of them was a bit shocked himself at how collected his lover sounded, but also because.. It was one thing to imagine taking someone up against a door and the places his mind was going to - which as he realised that the other had imagined taking him clinging to the door.. One thing didn't make the other any better.

,,Honestly, when I first began tending to you.. I actually had accepted that I would get nothing in return,.. So after everything, if it's something that you crave as much that you for once say what you truly feel.."

Before Jiang Cheng could even try to cut the taller ones speech off.. Well.. the view that he got as Lan Xichen stretched and then how he somehow managed to abandon his pride while ever so elegantly leaning forward.. The younger male could feel a rather hard reaction coming from his length as he stared at the others entirety with no sense of shame left while the Jade was trying to make himself comfortable.

,,Fuck.."

Even though the younger leader let out a fuck, it was a clear "wow" from start to end, yet he still tried to snap them both out of it - only to be cut off from the tamed god.

,,No.. wait.. You don't have to. Isn't that awk-"

,,Didn't you tell me off before for speaking too much instead of doing things..?"

"Less talk, more actions", Jiang Cheng couldn't believe that he had one of the highest of Sect Leaders on all fours telling him to shut up and live his fantasy instead. The view he had was quite incredible, good enough to make him hesitate a bit more and his hand itch in want to slap that fine ass of the other..

Lan Xichen couldn't really believe what was going on either, nuzzling his head against his own arm to find a more comfortable resting position, he held his eyes closed shut.. It did feel extremely awkward, but just as he was about so speak up again he felt movement behind him.

,,Lower your hips a little, I'll tell you when to straighten yourself again."

Something about Jiang Cheng's voice sounded rather restless, which the Jade could only categorise as more than likely quite the arousal once he had done as told and.. Well, his lover leaned over him and the problem he felt pressing, as well as rubbing against his ass for a brief moment only confirmed that. Regardless of that, Jiang Cheng went back to what he had previously done.. just more intensely, more passionate and heated like.

Starting from the neck, the younger one of them proceeded to kiss, nibble, lick and occasionally bite his way down on the tamed god's back. It was hard to say whether the bites were intentional or tiny virgin mishaps, yet it all caused the former discomfort Lan Xichen had felt to vanish gradually. While the taller males breathing grew heavier again, his muscles relaxed and soon faint noises of pleasure escaped from him.. only the Jiang Sect leader knew what he was really aching for.

A few minutes passed like that, Jiang Cheng even though he was usually rather brutal,.. tended to the spots on his lovers back that he had scratched and dug his nails into quite gently. Not only because of how the Jade had treated him, but in reality Lan Xichen had never once done a thing to really rub him the wrong way. Even as he turned into some edgy, dark lord it had been clear that the older one disliked the change, yet he treated Jiang Cheng still with respect - almost as if he was the young boy of the time in the Cloud Recesses still.

The younger ones left arm was wrapped around the others chest, while his right hand caressed the skin he had already tended to.. At the end, he gently put some pressure onto the tamed god's shoulder as he spoke up - back in his slightly dominant and dirty tone.

,,Lift your hips again."

Regardless of how confident Jiang Cheng might've seemed as he momentarily let go of the taller male and watched the minimal position change.. He was in fact quite nervous, unsure about how his lover would react to the little fantasy of his. However, taking the other in, it was quite clear that so far Lan Xichen seemed to be quite into getting spoiled,.. And just like before it was also noticeable that the entire thing about always being covered from so many protective layers really left him terribly sensitive.

Not that the younger one minded it, it was both cute and arousing at the same time. Letting out a shaky breath, Jiang Cheng lifted his hands and gently yet with some roughness behind it trailed them a last time over his lovers back.. before they slid further down and began tending to the tamed god's fine ass. From caressing, to kneading,.. the one born in Yunmeng didn't really hold back, licking over and pulling on his lower lips as his mind ran wild at the sight.


	54. XiCheng 51

As dirty minded as Lan Xichen had appeared at some points, and maybe it was just due to being so sensitive that his mind had already almost entirely shut off at this point.. He couldn't figure out what was going to happen, what the younger Sect Leader's imagination was.. There were a few spots on his back where he reacted more strongly, yet in comparison to his neck and ears or simply listening to that foul language of his lover.. it really wasn't as much.

However, that would slightly change as the hands that were quite different to his own, began to tease his behind. Maybe it was just the younger one's slight fetish, but something about the rough, yet pure want he could feel in each squeeze and stroke.. A shiver ran down on the Jade's back, followed from a soft barely audible moan as Jiang Cheng continued what he had done to his back already.

The a tad smaller male had leaned in to the tamed gods lower back, going back to kissing, licking and sucking his way down to the tailbone area, that he himself was so sensitive at with his occasional bites in between. Wrapping his one arm back around Lan Xichen's waist, Jiang Cheng then made the bold move to go further down.. He repeated it all on one ass cheek of his lover, then the other. With how their bodies reacted, both could agree that it was more than likely a little something like a kink that they both shared. The tamed god's upper body gave in some further, while the younger males length had a good time leaking and twitching - each time Jiang Cheng bit and sucked a spot on one of those cheeks.

At the end once the tsundere had tended to as much of the others ass as he could reach easily,.. The arm of his that he had wrapped around the Jade let go, free hand now going back to squeeze the left cheek of the Jade.. and after two last pecks on both sides of his lovers ass, Jiang Cheng hesitated but ultimately caved in anyway.

The tamed god let out the same noise as the smaller one of them had done before: weirded out, surprised, yet strangey pleasured. After that he tensed, while keeping his eyes closed shut - it only sank in once several seconds had passed that the overly wet and soft sensation he had felt on THAT part of his body was.. As it sank in, Lan Xichen spoke up in a tone that was full of disbelief and shock - it was audible that he knew already what had happened, yet couldn't fully grasp it.

,,Did you.. Did you just.."

Instead of getting a reply, the same sensation went over his most private spot again.. causing the Jade to shiver and let out another one of the previously mentioned sounds, just that this time the pleasure already won in strength.

,,Do you want to run?"

Jiang Cheng only paused and spoke up in a slightly more gentle tone after teasing the other a last time.. in return, the older male spoke up in a bit of a trembling, weak, a little panicked tone.

,,You.. You can't do that!"

,,Why can't I use my tongue? 'Cause it's dirty? Where's the difference between thrusting my finger in and then sucking on it again, or just eating you out like I want to? Does it feel that terrible? 'Cause with how you reacted I doubt it."

As Lan Xichen didn't reply, and his body also didn't move an inch Jiang Cheng sticked his tongue out again and ran it in his clumsy virgin manner over the tight muscles a few times in a row. Like he had guessed, and went on to ask in his dirty knowing tone after the Jade's body gave in minimally, moaning a more honest and less suppressed one at the last lick.

,,If it feels good, how can it be wrong? I told you my mind goes further than yours.. Do you want me to stop?"

,,It's just.. so embarrassing.."

,,How about I make you stop thinking then, Huan?~ Relax.. I won't go too far or do it too long for now, alright?~"

Since his lover neither fought back, ran or said no.. The younger one went back in, his licks overly passionate and the hunger for it was clearly noticeable. His hands squeezing the tamed god's ass as he every so often paused to pay some attention to the finely toned cheeks as well. Jiang Cheng was intuitively from the start the dirtier minded giver, which surprisingly enough seemed to be the forbidden fruit the Lan Sect leader couldn't help but be pulled to.

It honestly didn't feel bad, not at all.. In fact, the older males mind soon shut off, one of his arms stretched out a little so he could paw on the poor sheets that he really seemed to have something against. The noises he let out also went more pleasured and less shy, yet he did hide most of his face in the crook of his elbow. No one would believe what had happened with Jiang Cheng on the receiving end, but that right now - literally - topped it all.

Even though he had said he wouldn't keep it going for too long, several minutes went by without either of the man realising. Jiang Cheng had really found a little something for himself, the only thing that made it better was that his lover was clearly into it as well.. It even got to the point where the younger one paused - to both of their displeasure - and lubed up his finger simply because he really wanted to devour the other deeper. As much as he had teased the tamed gods muscles, they really weren't letting him in with just the usage of his tongue.

,,Straighten your back a little, I want to prepare you."

Jiang Cheng had paused and sat up, watching closely how the taller male needed a moment to come to and do what he had asked for. The view each and every single time kept getting to him.. the way the Jade's body moved with each breath, his hanging head and the half exposed neck with the hair hanging on the other side.. He understood now how the other could get hard from doing nothing but imagining something like that as he slowly and gently closed the distance between his finger and the tight muscles.


	55. XiCheng 52

Lan Xichen only briefly tensed at the first contact of the digit against that private spot of his. Other than the younger one, something about how things had been running until now really got him to crave more. He didn't even think about restraint, or losing face, it was already now nothing but a pleasurable blur that he wanted to know more of.

Jiang Cheng began to ease the outer muscles in lightly at first, before gradually putting some more pressure on it. In between he every so often leaned in to tend to the fine cheeks of the tamed god.. At least as often as he could manage to rip his gaze away, which wasn't too often in all honesty. At the end it was a mere perfect coincidence that just as the younger one put enough pressure on the muscles for the tip of his middle finger to slide in - the Jade let out a heavy breath, which due to the widening of his muscles turned into a soft moan at the end.

,,Fuck.."

The foul mouthed sect leader couldn't help but let out a curse as he felt the extreme tightness around his digit, how soft and hot the inside was. Just like Lan Xichen's earlier, his own eyes fell shut.. he needed a few seconds before he unintentionally let his words out that he was thinking in such a content and pleased, yet dirty tone.

,,Huan, how the hell could you stay so calm earlier..? Your muscles gave in so easily.. where's all the tension I felt..? Do you really want it that much?~"

To his surprise, the muscles around his digit tightened before a shudder went down the Jade's body.. A moment later Lan Xichen spoke up with his voice trembling from pleasure yet honest in sound with no hint of his former embarrassment left.

,,I do.. even more than before.."

It was unclear which of them was trapping them in a deeper state similiar to a hypnosis at this point,.. Hearing those words, even though he hadn't planned to, Jiang Cheng pushed his finger deeper inside. The younger one only realised it as he was all the way in and the other tensed. Looking up the smaller one could see the hand rip on the sheets, while the tamed god moaned so deeply at the same time before another bad shudder went through him.

,,Shit.. sorry, I didn't mean to.."

Jiang Cheng didn't know what to do, he had fucked up already now and.. And what? Should he pull the finger back out? Should he stay still?

,,A-Cheng.. just.. give me a moment... It doesn't really hurt.. it was just unexpected.."

,,I.. Maybe we should stop here.."

The younger sect leader didn't really want to, even the tamed god hadn't sounded like he was hurt or truly minding what had happened but.. If he couldn't even keep himself together right at the start, then..

Lan Xichen was meanwhile taking and letting out a few breaths to calm himself and relaxed again only seconds after his lovers last few words. Exhaling another breath, the older male spoke up in a tone that sounded a bit more like him.. calm, reassuring and first of all: gentle.

,,You've always struggled with believing in yourself, A-Cheng.. If you truly feel like.. we should stop, then alright.. You haven't made me feel.. bad once until now.. just so you know.."

Hearing those words, even though it was embarrassing that the Lan Sect leader had to comfort him in their current position.. it calmed the younger one somewhat. After letting out a little breath himself, he leaned back in to the fine ass of his lover and placed a few almost apologetic little pecks on it. This time instead of feeling tension, he heard a welcoming little hum which made it easier for him to flip the switch back over again.

Moving on from the little accident, Jiang Cheng kept his hand still while he pecked his way to where their bodies currently connected. He loved the sight, yet closed his eyes before licking over the part of the muscles that were stretched from his finger as far as he could reach. The taller one in turn let out a shaky breath while his muscles clenched around the digit. It was a strangely thrilling chain of events for the smaller sect leader.

,,A-Cheng.. you can move.."

There was it, a bit of awkwardness had welled up inside of the tamed god again.. yet it didn't last too long because his lover had waited for something like that. Lan Xichen got a reply in form of a slow motion of the finger almost leaving him, then it got pushed back inside just as slow, which brought the weirdly intoxicating feeling of being full back again. Neither of them said a word, as Jiang Cheng began to widen the muscles that really gave in quite a bit quicker than his own had done.. and it didn't take long before the older one of them let out soft breaths that soon had a pleasured little noise hidden in them.

After a while where he every so often licked over the stretched muscles something came up in the smaller ones mind. How did the other find his spot again..? He had moved his hips against the touch.. Was it up or down with the hips..? It took a bit for Jiang Cheng to figure out that he had moved his hips down so that the pressure would be caused at a spot above.. Just like that he had to turn the scenario around in his inexperienced mind, since they were in the exact opposite position. Once it had made click, the younger male sat back up and went a little more daring with the thrusting motions, mostly those that lead his finger to entirely disappear inside.

The overly relaxed and lost in the moment Lan Xichen didn't expect what happened next. He was letting out his pleasured soft noises in between of his slowly relaxing breath as the movement inside of him slightly changed.. The thrusting motions of his lover were different to those he had used.. While he was somewhat of the shy and gentle type, Jiang Cheng was more daring and gentle in his own slightly rougher way. The next thing the Jade felt however got him to let out such a pleased and a tad louder moan while his body gave in further and his hand ripped the poor sheets apart at yet another spot.


	56. XiCheng 53

,,Feeling that good?~"

It was such a tease of a question that Jiang Cheng knew the answer perfectly fine to. Only a short amount of time had passed since he felt that strange sensation taking over his own body after all. And once he had found the spot, even though he was aching like mad for the real deal by now already.. he teased it several times in a row, without making any further movement with his digit. It was so delicious how the usually so collected, prim and proper Jade lost control from something so small.

Lan Xichen turned into a bit of a moaning mess, going from between struggling to keep himself up, to propping himself up on one of his arms a few times. He hadn't teased his lover that way, yet he couldn't deny that as strange as it at first felt - as little did he really want it to stop. After a few minutes maybe, he caved in as the sheet got another rip at a spot his hand could reach while letting out one of the most honest and pleasured sounding of things he had said until then.

,,Fuck.."

The younger one that had lost himself in it all until then paused, he was quite shocked from the phrase. It wasn't like the tamed god hadn't formerly cursed during their playtime together, but it was the first time that he actually used such a phrase on his own - not covered up as ending Jiang Cheng's sentences. Maybe he shouldn't feel that way.. no, he really shouldn't have gotten so turned on from it, yet it happened.

Within the short moment something inside the current top snapped. Pulling his finger out, Jiang Cheng grabbed the older males ass and began to really devour the squirming Jade's muscles that twitched in want for more. They both moaned at the first contact and other than before Lan Xichen was far more honest, his moans deeper and louder - also because the wet muscle of the Jiang Sect leader was now able to tease deeper as well.

While before the first time had been calm and relaxed, now where their roles were reversed it was dirty and heated. Who knew how much they'd be capable of if they'd do the same a few times more..? Neither enjoyed it any less and while the tamed god was for the first time in his life really able to let go, something inside of Jiang Cheng was so into the idea of being able to make him do so.

For a bit the smaller one of them kept teasing with his tongue.. He only stopped when it annoyed him that he couldn't push it any deeper and sucked on two of his digits this time. Closing his eyes, Jiang Cheng tried to refrain from losing track of the reality which was that the Jade hadn't been in this position yet.. It worked enough for the younger one of them to still speak up in this dirty, shaking tone of his.

,,Stay still."

It was really easier said than done for the Lan Sect leader, he had to take and let out a few breaths before he managed to do so.. However, like they had done earlier with the younger male as the bottom, they found their rhythm in this scenario as well. They both were quite the switches in bed. Jiang Cheng gently eased a bit of his fingers in, Lan Xichen barely tensed and didn't need half as long as the other had done to relax. After that the one born in Yunmeng would ease them in further before pausing.

Once his digits were entirely wrapped up from the tight embrace and it noticeably gave in.. Jiang Cheng would start with gentle yet quicker motions, then find the spot and tease it until the Jade's body would give in. After that, the smaller male would continue until he couldn't hold back his urge any longer and devour his lovers tight hole that let more and more of his wet muscle in.

What they did was almost a edging game. Everything started calm and gentle and the more Lan Xichen had gotten used to it, the more heated the end would be. They would both reach high in the pleasure heaven, then drop back far enough into reality to not end up harming the older one of them. Needless to say that both of their lengths were a mess.. Or that their heartbeats and breathing were all over the place.. Or that the poor sheet wasn't even recognisable any longer soon into it.. Or that the tamed god was actually still quite the wild moaning beast.. And first of all, needless to say that they were terribly hungry for one another, the longer it went on. It was a pure thrill.

Already at the second digit they lost the track a little,.. It wouldn't be a surprise that if they should end up in such a position once more some day it would actually go all the way just like that. Jiang Cheng was in his element and really needed to force himself to stop, let some saliva drip down on his fingers and.. well.. Looking at the state his lover was in by then, it was rather clear that steadying himself would be almost impossible. If seen like that with no knowledge about who the trembling, weak mess was - no one would guess it was the older Jade of the Lan Sect.

With that said, the younger one of them forced himself to snap out a little more, he couldn't get himself to rip the other out of his state right now. Rubbing his three fingers of which 2 were drenched by then over the gaping, twitching hole of his lover he really went for the first time as gently as Lan Xichen had done to him about easing them in. The tamed god tensed a little, then shuddered and moaned as it vanished.. In between, Jiang Cheng had leaned back in and licked the more and more softening muscle as far as he could - it always had a really strange sense of comfort to it, like a parent pecking the wound of a child.. Almost as if he was somehow feeling sorry for it.


	57. XiCheng 54

The Jade's body kept moving each time the digits drang deeper inside, his moans sounding so shocked and overwhelmed, yet overly pleasured. If Jiang Cheng wouldn't know that he was actually drunk, he'd probably be now just from all the reactions.. However, once the third finger was also tightly wrapped up and all three were getting held in place, he paused after taking minutes to ease them in. At the end he spoke up in his own terribly aroused tone, but with a gentle undertone to it - he couldn't help but ask.

,,Huan, are you alright..?"

While the tamed god had for a long time hid his face against the crook of his elbow, sooner of later both of his arms had mostly stretched out. The sheets only looked worse and worse and his head that was hanging free also fell back, or further down a few times. It took quite a bit of time to try and find words in his state, not only because his head wasn't working at all but also because of the heavy panting.

,,.. I'm fine.."

|Fuck does his voice sound sexy like that..|

Jiang Cheng couldn't help the thought.. the voice was so weak, yet rough, deep and trembling like mad. His lover sounded so breathless but at the same time relaxed and.. almost happy or overjoyed. The younger one of them was so positively shaken up by it that his own voice trembled lightly as he asked another question.

,,Sorry, but I have to ask... What do you want from here on out..?"

,,Mmh..?"

,,Honestly, you're enjoying yourself so much right now that I'd feel like shit if I stop at some point just to thrust in.. What I meant was, do you wanna go all the way like that, or not..?"

With how long the Jade took to reply or grasp his words, it made it even harder to stop and rip him out of it now. Jiang Cheng had needed the kind of treatment, yet he had experienced it all already.. love, care, maybe not as much as some, but as it sank in that it was probably the first time in his lovers life that he could actually let go and all of that.. It hit differently, and if he'd know the remaining story of Lan Xichen it would've hit even deeper.

,,I.."

The tamed god hesitated before he continued.. and even then the hesitation kept being audible in his unstable voice.

,,To be honest... A part of me.. wants it to happen while you take me.. I want to hold onto you and have comfort... but the aching for it isn't as strong as.. the one to get messed up.. being able to let go.. it feels so good.. I can't think.. I can't-"

,,Huan.. Don't start thinking.. You're nothing more than yourself right now.. Nothing else matters.. It's no one's business.. For me, both is completely fine.. What do you really want, Huan?"

It was the first time that Jiang Cheng spoke in a tone so full of reassurance, even if the position they were in was a rather intimate, or strange one for that. He could somehow sense that the taller one of them was trying to keep some restraint up, maybe not even to save face but more than likely out of fear towards what would happen with him afterwards. The restraint was his shell, he didn't know anything but that, the younger Sect leader slowly began to understand that as he interrupted the others speech.

Lan Xichen's struggle was noticeable. He was fighting with himself, to the point where his body tensed and his hands clenched into fists. At this point Jiang Cheng pulled his digits out, watching for a few more seconds in silence as the elders head dropped onto the sheets.

,,What we're doing has nothing to do with our sects.. If you're trying to think how you're supposed to go back to being the older Jade, if you listen to your own want now for once.. Honestly, all that we did could be bad for our sects. It's too late to think about that.. You have to find yourself and accept yourself once, Huan.. How do you want to change a thing if you always do nothing but live based on what others see you as, or expect you to be..? You're not losing yourself right now, you're finding yourself. There's a difference.. I don't know much about it, but isn't a bedroom, or lover supposed to be the place or person where you can let go? What happens there, gets said and so on, stays there and gets kept there, or not? I know what you're feeling, but right now you're not a sect leader, you're you. You're not a Lan Sect rules slave, you're you. What does the real you want, Huan?"

A good few minutes of silence passed after the last word that Jiang Cheng spoke between them. Honestly, the younger one was already starting to think that the other would maybe break down.. He could also not deny entirely that he was feeling a strange wave of rage towards the Jade's sect come over him, because just within the few rooms of the Nie Sect were their 2 most loved disciples.. And they were secretly nothing more than broken wrecks in so many ways that it was almost disgusting, as well as heartbreaking at the same time.

The slightly smaller male didn't know what to do.. Should he leave? Should he try to comfort the other, that clearly had quite a few mental struggles of his own secretly? Like before, he didn't find an answer and ended up running his hand through his hair.

Meanwhile Lan Xichen was fighting with himself.. or more against himself in silence. He knew what he wanted, the voice inside of him was yelling at him loudly, too loudly to be ignored or drowned out no matter how hard he tried. The tamed god was simply scared of exactly what the one born in Yunmeng had mentioned.. How would he be supposed to go back if he'd let himself drown more? He knew by then that if he'd let go once, or just with how far he had already felt until then he wouldn't be able to resist feeling the same again. The words Jiang Cheng had said kept repeating and repeating in his mind, at the end the voice won as he couldn't resist.. He wouldn't be able to know what could happen if he'd never let it go that far, would he? Wouldn't he regret it for the rest of his life?

At the end the tension vanished with a shudder that went all the way through the taller one of them. And after letting out a heavy as anything breath he spoke up in a voice that sounded like he really had been on the verge of a breakdown, somewhat ashamed yet so overly sure and full of a certain vibe of a begging at the same time.

,,A-Cheng... Make me let go... don't let me overthink... m-.. mess me up.."


	58. XiCheng 55

Watching the half breakdown of his lover.. as excited as he had been, Jiang Cheng couldn't help that he had calmed down quite a lot already before the other spoke up. Somehow, to him even if the wonder should occur and Lan Xichen would ask him to continue either of the options.. it had somehow turned out for him the way it had been for the older one: It wasn't all about him. Again, it only sank in now for the Jiang Sect leader that this entire situation between them had only happened because of a lot more deeper going meanings than purely sexual want. Even after living in Gusu for a year, he didn't know at all how hard it must be to never truly let yourself go, or grow, or experience who you really are or could be.

The younger one had already experienced how good it could feel to be on the receiving end.. To get taken over by someone, let go, lose control, yet even though that was the case, he wasn't a Lan. His guesses only got further confirmed as the tamed god then spoke up, even the words he used.. while they were somewhat shocking to hear in general out of the Jade's mouth, it made it so much clearer how much of a struggle it must be to see that right there as anything positive. Jiang Cheng ended up saying a few more things more out of reflex, still in that even to him foreign gentle tone of his.

,,I'm not messing you up.. It feels fucking good to be able to let go.. You're just scared.. I get it.. Don't cry, alright? What you feel is natural.. We all want sex or a lover to be able to let go, don't we? I'll make you feel good, relax.."

After saying his last word the slightly smaller male let out a inaudible sigh, they really were both quite a handful - weren't they? Regardless of that thought, he leaned back in and pecked each ass cheek once before licking teasingly and lightly over the widened muscle of his lover. He repeated that a few times more before he was getting into the flow again.. by far not entirely, but hearing and feeling how his lover gave in almost instantly again and began to moan softly.. How could he say no? Once he had teased the Jade enough for his muscles to clench in want for more, as soon as they relaxed again he made the rather bold move of darting his tongue in.

It could be Jiang Cheng's imagination, but somehow the tamed god appeared to get more and more sensitive the more layers of his facade were gone. As cute and tempting that was, it was a little stressful and put some pressure on the younger ones shoulders as well.. He wasn't that gentle of a guy, could that even end well? At the same time, how should anything of what they were doing the past hours end well? He hadn't found a reply to those questions by the time were his own virgin mind got mildly taken over by the task in front of him once more. For a few short minutes Jiang Cheng kept eating the Jade out before he let quite the good amound of saliva drip down, it was quite the sight to see it run down into the depths of his lover.

Without much hesitation this time, due to having gotten the permission to "mess the other up" the smaller Sect Leader lifted his hand and gently inserted the three fingers again. They had been previously eased in, so he only gave it a few moments to repeat the process before he began to thrust. What he didn't pick up again however were the comforting licks over the widened muscles, not that he didn't want to but he somehow felt the need to keep his eyes on the tamed god this time.. And just as thought, Lan Xichen soon began to fall apart. He was quite full, then the movements, how close he had been before.. Let's just say that his desperate and pleasured moans quickly re-echoed at least in their room.. if they weren't audible in those around them as well.

Jiang Cheng was into it, how couldn't he be? However, his mind stayed rather clear and not long after the muscles around his digits had given in, to the gentle yet more daring and rough thrusts of them, he recalled something. Even though over all the more full he had been himself, the better it felt - when it came to that certain spot, and the amount of body parts getting used to please it - one had really felt better. It was just more.. precise, even though he didn't want to say that out loud at all.

With that said, pulling his digits out the younger one of them only thrusted one back inside. His eyes were fixed on Lan Xichen who was panting, occasionally shivering and trapped between being tense and relaxed. Moving his finger, Jiang Cheng began to tease nothing but the others sweet spot, only thrusting shallowly every so often when he needed to, since he wasn't used to doing such a task for so long yet.

The Jade's mind had almost shut off already before that happened, however.. Feeling nothing but the massage that made his body tingle, for a while he relaxed entirely. His head was resting on the torn sheet, hips relatively steady just like most of his body.. After a few minutes however the pleasure gradually began to drown him, every so often his hips twitched uncontrolled, which also happened more and more often the longer the massage kept going.

Lan Xichen's moans were choked at times, yet mostly they were full of pleasue and making it clear that it was overwhelming him in a good way. Not only in a good way, in truth he had never once felt anything like that - Later on, once his mind would clear again, he'd come to understand how Jiang Cheng wasn't able to explain how he was feeling when the roles had been reversed.

There was nothing audible in the Nie Sect's guest room - or residence - other than the sounds of pleasure the Jade was letting out and here and there a few wet noises caused from the motions the younger male made with his fingers.


	59. XiCheng 56

Jiang Cheng would probably keep hearing the sounds his lover was making, for forever.. He couldn't even try to imagine how he was.. or how both of them were supposed to act normal around one another again, after spending half a day devouring one another.

The tamed god lost the control over himself more and more. He couldn't hear his own moans, he could in fact do nothing but feel and moan and sometimes take in the thumping of his own heart that rang in his ears. The mess his length was making was also rather incredible.. The trembling of his went worse and worse, the uncontrolled twitching of his hips at times making it hard for the inexperienced younger male to really keep going with his task.

He wasn't really planning to do anything further than massaging the others sweet spot.. That was at least until the Jiang Sect leader watched how one of his lovers hands that had sticked to tugging and ripping on the sheets until then began to move. The tamed god was a mess, his movements and entirety had none of his usual elegance left.. It was shocking, yet such a good feeling at the same time for the smaller one of them, that he couldn't bear watching Lan Xichen touch his own front. Jiang Cheng knew that he had already made him let go of "himself" far enough, apart from that.. His lover was so unstable right now, he wasn't too sure if touching oneself in such a state was a good idea.

Lan Xichen's legs had spread a bit further by then, he wasn't really far away and if nothing was clear - that was for sure. His upper body had mostly caved in, his ass sticking up in the air.. At the end the younger leader was a tad quicker, reaching through between his lovers legs he wrapped his hand around the like crazy twitching length. It felt so wrong, using his left hand to do that. There was no way the rubs with this hand of his were skilled, yet somehow he knew perfectly fine that at this point in time it wasn't about how good it would be.. Honestly, it had been quite hard for him to resist the urge to touch himself earlier as well - The pressure that was building up, how much liquid there'd come out after the build up was complete, anyone would have the urge to drive over that edge and find relief already.

From this point on, it took maybe five more minutes before the tamed god's back arched, his hips pressing against the digit inside of his tight cage. The moan he let out was quite loud, a pure outcry of a pleasured curse as his entire body and length tensed. Only after the first lot of liquid had left his system did the older one of them collapse back on the bed, his body cramping with each new wave of his release. It took several minutes before his body calmed down, he was shaking and torn between trying to thrust into the grip around his length and moving his ass against the touch on his sweet spot.

Even Jiang Cheng couldn't deny that the scene's entirety would probably be able to get him off without the need to touch himself if he'd have a major build-up from weeks without any sort of relief. He was feeling quite restless and had to fight against the urge to pull his finger out, thrust in and make the other cum a few times more in a row. But he didn't, instead he kept it all going until even the last of waves of the aftermath from his lovers release was over.. And there were a lot of them, it was unclear which was more intense, the release itself, or how long one's body would feel it still afterwards.

As the younger one let go of the Jade's length and pulled his digit out of the overly prepared embrace,.. He couldn't help but stare at Lan Xichen for a bit in silence. Jiang Cheng didn't really need to ask, he knew the answer perfectly just from looking at his lover, yet after a while he spoke up regardless in such a soft and caring tone.. He couldn't even recognise it as his own voice anymore.

,,Huan.. Can you turn around?"

Lan Xichen neither moved nor did he give a reply for several seconds, if not a minute or two.. Even after that, he only moved one of his arms that felt so heavy yet relaxed a little. He had tried, on the inside a lot more than it appeared on the outside, more seconds passed before he slowly and hesitately shook his head.

,,Do you want me to leave..?"

,,No.. I... I just... I want to hug you... kiss you.. I don't want to stop right now... I don't want to go back to reality just yet.."

It was a bit of a heartwrenching moment regardless of how sexy the taller one of them sounded with his raspy, deep yet weak and breathless tone.. There was a soft half smile playing on the Jiang Sect leaders lips, they both really sucked at being honest unless driven so far into a corner - didn't they?

,,Alright.."

Jiang Cheng's tone remained soft, stroking over his lovers back a few times in a comforting manner before he quite gently wrapped his arm around the older males upper body.

,,I'll just help you sit up and then I'll change our position."

The tamed Jade nodded slowly, in silence. It was the first time in so many years that he had literally not a bit of strength left in his body.

From there on everything was up to the soft side of the tsundere. He helped his lover sit up, turned him around a little and then got up from the bed before lifting him up.

,,Who's the carried one now, Huan?~"

It was probably the softest of a tease Jiang Cheng had used in his life as he stood there beside the bed with the through his treatment weak as anything Lan Xichen wrapped around him. Everything only went cuter as regardless of their difference in heigh, the older one of them still hid his red and sweaty face against his neck.

After letting out a soft chuckle the tamed tsundere steadied himself, then carefully and a little bit clumsily crawled back onto the be, so his lover was able to lay underneath him.. To Jiang Cheng's surprise though, Lan Xichen turned his head away, while his legs sank down on the sheets but regardless his arms remained wrapped around the younger ones neck.

,,What are you getting embarrassed for now..? Didn't you say you want to make out? Alright, fine.. if you wanna have it that way.."

The one born in Yunmeng had looked at his lover for a few moments in anticipation, then he spoke up in a acted upset tone, with too much amusement being audible.. Then he leaned in to the Jade's exposed neck and bit into the skin, not too hard but.. who knew, maybe enough to leave a little bruise.


	60. XiCheng 57

,,Wh-"

Lan Xichen had let out a noise that was between surprise and a bit of pleasure before he finally turned his head and was about to let out a "what" yet.. Well, the slightly smaller male was already looking down at him with so much amusement being visible, he even dared to go on to shrug and play innocent.

,,You didn't really leave me much of a choice, did you?"

The Jade only replied after his lips had formed into such a clear pout.

,,That doesn't mean you have to bite."

,,And your words right now don't mean that you didn't like it.~"

,,A-Cheng!"

,,Mmh?~"

Each time the older one of them tried to scold or act all serious he was cut off by the younger one that had slipped into quite the playful, yet dirty side of his. A smirk ended up playing on Jiang Cheng's lips as he stared into his lovers dark, a little teary eyes while whispering words that sounded as dirty as his choice of words was, yet absurdly sweet at the same time.

,,Huan.. Honestly, I enjoyed eating your ass out so much.. You came so hard and you were spilling such a load while making such lewd noises, I almost got it off from nothing but that myself~"

If someone would be able to blush loudly, the shade of pink that covered Lan Xichen's cheeks as he heard those words would've been a damn loud scream. He was so embarrassed he couldn't even look away, yet his jaw had dropped slightly.

,,Stick your tongue out."

Jiang Cheng continued as if nothing had happened, his tone a bit above a whisper as he brushed his lips against the others.. Lan Xichen only blinked in his gone out state, so the younger one threw in another lot of words.

,,Don't question it, just do it."

There was something inside of the tamed god that wanted to refuse, yet he was still aching for more.. And so, after a few more times of their lips brushing together without an actual kiss happening he hesitatingly did as told.

Seeing that, the soft tsundere smirked before he licked with his own tongue over the others, then he began to gently suck on the wet muscle. For a first time it was really strange, yet it was only the start and after only a few seconds Jiang Cheng started to take over his lovers mouth. Moaning softly here and there, soon into it the younger one of them could feel the Jade entangle his fingers into his hair.

,,I really wanna fuck you hard.. If I wouldn't feel the exhaustion already kicking in since quite a while.. Honestly, be glad Huan, if that wouldn't be the case I'd probaly keep my cock shoved up your ass for several rounds..~"

It was a brief moment of the younger ones normal self acting up, yet as soon as his words were out once he had broken the kiss a tiny smile played on his lips. Jiang Cheng wasn't aware of it but his almond colored eyes looked rather gentle and caring, which was really something new.

,,Hey, Huan.. can I thrust in?"

The tamed god was still feeling rather weak, his eyes had widened at the first lot of words the other had said, yet a soft smile played on his lips because of both the vibe going out from the younger leader.. and the soft tone he used, that couldn't quite overtone how eager he was to lose his last first time of the night. At the end Lan Xichen spoke up in his in a good way miserable sounding tone, unable to hold back a bit of a tease himself.

,,You mean, before you fall asleep on me?~"

,,Don't talk as if we both don't already know you're the type that would be into cuddling after."

,,Well, tonight I might win since you really appear to be the type that would just get up and leave, which you're not able to do since it's your room, A-Cheng~"

Jiang Cheng couldn't really deny that he probably was exactly that type of a guy, yet he regardless still glared - not that it was one anyone would take serious at that time.

,,Watch your mouth, Huan.. remember that I can still just throw you out after, who says I'm not that type of a guy?"

,,The only way I would be able to move after you take further care of me would be if you carry me to my room that's almost at the other end of this building. If that's what you wish to do, then..~"

|Well fuck..|

Was all the younger one thought, so much that it was even visible on his face. After clearing his throat he sat up and ran his hand through his hair - somehow, he couldn't really win against the Jade when it came to arguments at all.

The tamed god stared in silence, as much as he tried he couldn't even help but stare as his lover went about lubing his length up.. He already thought he was safe and that the other hadn't noticed the twitch of his own still erect problem because of it.. but Lan Xichen was wrong, which he realised as Jiang Cheng tilted his head, smirked and kept the purely to show off strokes going as he spoke in a tone to match his words.

,,Like what you see?~"

If only the Jade would have a tad more of a foul mouth he'd more than likely given a good counter attack.. Since he didn't have it though, he could only blush again and stare up at the ceiling. Yet he did hit the younger sect leader with some sweet and honest words while just mentioned one leaned back over him.

,,Other than what you might think, you've actually always been labelled as one of the most handsome disciples.. You've actually always stood out more than you think, A-Cheng. In a unique way as well."

,,Idiot."

Jiang Cheng half choked on his words, he really wanted to act all cool and be like "as if I didn't know that", but it was so out of the blue and in such a strange moment that he couldn't do so. The chuckle the taller male let out didn't make it much better, yet the soft tsundere let out a heavy breath and spoke up in a more calm tone as if nothing had happened.

,,Relax.."


	61. XiCheng 58

,,Mmh.."

Lan Xichen let out a soft hum, closing his eyes he took and let out a heavy breath of his own. In the meantime his lover unbeknownst to him actually had quite the shaky hands. The nervousness had kicked in without Jiang Cheng making it noticeable. Laying there, the older one could feel something hot, hard and foreign rub against him,.. Then the slow build-up of pressure before his muscles gave in and wrapped around the tip of the length tightly. His back had arched a little, yet even though he had moaned softly himself all he heard was the soft, overwhelmed curse of the younger male.

The one that usually wore the purple robes of the Jiang Sect felt himself twitch quite a few times. He didn't need to go slow, even his virgin self knew the preparation had been done well enough.. Regardless of that though, he needed quite a few minutes to ease himself all the way in and lean over the Jade that seemed far more content than he had been. The only reason why Jiang Cheng needed the breaks was because he would spill if he'd do anything differently within moments only. He honestly couldn't get how his lover had managed it the way he had done.

,,Fuck.. so tight.."

It was a bit of a weird compliment, but the taller sect leader still took it as one. Opening his eyes, Lan Xichen lifted one of his hands to stroke over his lovers cheek, who ironically enough held his eyes closed while his entire body was tense - as if he was the bottom still, or again.

,,Take your time..~"

,,What kind of shit is that.. You still have to comfort me even now, like what the.."

Jiang Cheng was for once whining around and showing frustration so noticeably over his little situation that the tamed god didn't know if he should chuckle, or rather remain silent.

,,The more pressure you put on yourself.. The way we tend to ourselves is different.. I don't expect you to go about things the way I did."

,,As if any normal person would be able to go the way you did, for fucks sake.."

,,A-Cheng.. kiss me already and let go.."

Hearing those words the younger male looked up, Lan Xichen's eyes were still filled with love and gentleness, but his entirety glowed a lot more from all the pleasure he had felt. After a last moment of saving the view in his mind, Jiang Cheng leaned in and started a kiss that was full of desperate want.

At the end his body began to move on it's own while the Jade wrapped his arms around his neck,.. It was true, everything about them was different now again as well. Jiang Cheng's thrusts were gentle and clumsy while they both moaned into the kiss that neither broke. Other than the taller one, he also didn't stick for long to the all the way motions his lover preferred.. It could be said that he was more daring, or overly eager to tease the spot that drove Lan Xichen wild as often as he could, due to the shorter amount of time he needed to hit it with his own way of moving his hips.

Apart from that Jiang Cheng turned out to be quite into kissing while making love.. He rarely broke the kiss to catch some air, or tease the tamed god's neck. Needless to say that the noises of pleasure they let out really wouldn't only be audible in "their" room.

Some time passed before the younger leaders movements began to have more control behind them, they were both dripping with sweat at this point, faces red and let's just say.. The filling Jiang Cheng still had inside of him made it quite a lot better, at least to him. It would turn into a not so funny task later on however to try and comb the mess that their hair had turned into.

However, sooner or later one of Jiang Cheng's arms moved naturally and got wrapped around the tamed god's waist for easier access.. He really should've used the pillow trick the other had showed him, not that either of the man minded the even closer position they had now. It was the oppoiste, Lan Xichen actually ended up wrapping his legs around the younger ones body to bring them even closer together.

Everything about this constellation was raw and rough, in such a weirdly gentle manner.. No, rough wasn't the right word, passionate would be more fitting.

It was a little embarrassing but they really didn't need any longer than half the amount of time Lan Xichen had spend to drive them over the edge.. Jiang Cheng couldn't even keep up a proper rhythm towards the end where they stopped kissing just to moan into one anothers mouth. This time the younger one of them did a few cruel things to the poor sheet as he felt his release come closer while the clenching of his lovers muscles around him only contributed to that.. Almost as if the tight embrace was aching for his liquid.

,,A-Cheng.."

,,Fuck.. I know.... I'm here.. Let go.."

The Jade's voice sounded so full of pleasure, yet breathless and weak - just like Jiang Cheng's.. They both couldn't say much, yet each word they said drove the other that tad closer to the edge. For a few seconds the smaller male leaned back in to start a literal mess of a kiss that broke almost as soon as it began.

Both of the men in the Nie Sect's guest room ended up moaning one anothers names in sync, so loud and pleasured and choked it could almost be called a sin. At the same time they tensed so badly from head to toe, each because of their own release, that Jiang Cheng just alone because of the legs that were squeezing him could barely move. Was it bad? Honestly, for the taller one it was more of a struggle that his climax could barely be helped to finish.. Yet on the soft tsundere's side it wasn't half as bad - He was burried all the way in, the muscles were contracting around him in quite a quick pace at first, and so strongly it almost hurt.

At the end the younger sect leader had to use the remaining bits of his physical strength to go against the hug of his lovers legs. By then it wasn't even for his own pleasure, the thrusts he picked up were purely for the one underneath him to be able to find full relief... Jiang Cheng who's eyes had fallen shut at some point opened slightly, he had felt a hand that had gotten placed on his back a while ago.. It was scratching and pawing while Lan Xichen's face was showing nothing but pleasure.


	62. XiCheng 59

Lan Xichen didn't know what heaven was like.. Yet he had thought that even if not like others, he had had quite a few great moments in his life. Well, in comparison with those and how he was feeling right now with Jiang Cheng he truly began to question what he had done with his life so far. Was he even alive? He hadn't found an answer to that even as the last of his knots had already ripped apart. The mind of his was clouded, completely peaceful for the first time in a long time as he felt more than one warmth spread through his body.

What the older male didn't know was that during almost the entirety of his release, the soft tsundere had stared at him. Jiang Cheng was so intrigued by the scene that, even as the legs of his lover gave in a little, he kept thrusting without taking that fact in any longer. He was completely gone out.. If that's what it meant when the time would freeze, or the world would stop turning for a moment in a person's life, than he had hit the jackpot.

They were both shaking and drenched in sweat, yet whether or not the younger one of them noticed.. It really took the waves of the tamed god a long time to subside, especially those that came after the load of a release had already been spilled all over the both of them.

As the older one opened his eyes, minutes later.. Well, the younger one looked even better than he had imagined. His dark hair hiding their faces from the outside world, not a sign of agitation, hatred or rage distorting it,.. this gentle and stunned, almost falling in love kind of stare on him, the slight pink on Jiang Cheng's cheeks and how the veins in his neck had began to pop out from the workout. The Jade himself was still panting and moaning softly due to the thrusts that were now those he seemed to have already grown to like - all the way in and out, rather slow as well.

Jiang Cheng in turn had already been so hypnotised it was almost embarrassing. He was staring so shamelessly down at his lover.. What he didn't expect however was what happened after god knew how much time had passed. As he watched the tamed god open his eyes.. The scene actually took his breath away. Lan Xichen's eyes were full of tears, his hair spread out underneath him almost like a fan, a few sweat pearls on his forehead.. All that was completed by the look in his teary eyes that showed nothing but love and softness, his cheeks tinted in pink and a smile formed on his lips that matched the older ones lovesick like stare.

The slightly smaller male swallowed.. It was so visible how vulnerable the Jade was, that he could probably shatter into tiny pieces if handled in a little bit of the wrong way like glass. Even though far too late, Jiang Cheng only realised now how much the other must've ached for it all, how much trust he had been given.. And first of all, he had actually managed to make his lover let go, he had finally managed to make someone happy and smile and...

,,Oh fuck... shit.."

Within the blink of an eye the moment changed, the younger males eyes had widened before he dropped his head while cursing as his entire body tensed.

Lan Xichen's worry however vanished as soon as it had kicked in because.. he could feel what was going on far too deeply and didn't speak up as the other fought with himself. The curses kept coming and almost shock like waves went through his lover for maybe a little over a minute before Jiang Cheng spoke up in a tone so dead embarrassed that the tamed god felt bad for finding it so immensely adorable.

,,That.. That didn't just happen... fuck.. shit.."

,,It's okay, A-Cheng-"

The younger ones head shot up, his face was more than bright red as he continued to talk in his panicked, dead embarrassed tone.. or at least he did so until he realised it and let his head drop onto the older ones chest.

,,I just fucking spilled while looking at your damn face, how is that.."

Lan Xichen didn't reply instantly, instead he let his legs drop onto the sheets before moving his hips so the others length would be let free. While a shiver ran over the taller ones spine, Jiang Cheng tensed - it was feeling almost painful at this point. After that, the tamed god wrapped his arms back around his lovers neck and one of his hands began to stroke in a comforting manner through the younger males hair. Only then did the Jade speak up in his rough sounding voice that was just like his gesture full of comfort, gentleness and love.

,,A-Cheng.. you had just.. found relief and didn't stop moving.. something like that can happen.."

The one born in Yunmeng tensed again, while the tamed god's words had truth behind them, he was only so upset because what he had said himself was the actual reason for his literal accident.

,,You're shaking so badly.. let go already.. you've reached your limit, don't overdo it.."

Once he heard those words, Jiang Cheng looked up and at his arms that he had propped himself up with at some point. He only began to feel it then that he was shaking from head to toe, like he was about to freeze to death from the exhaustion, overstimulation and the new kind of workout his muscles had to keep up with. It only made him feel even more ashamed since the Lan Sect leader appeared to be quite fine still,..

,,I... I can't move... We need the blanket as well, if we don't wanna actually get sick.."

The younger ones voice was only audible to the tamed god because of his from cultivational training so overly heightened senses. Knowing that it must've been the hardest of tasks for his lover to admit that, Lan Xichen didn't say a word and only took a few breaths to collect his own remaining physical strength. At the end it was a task of only seconds for him to lift the other up, pull back the blanket, lay them down and cover them up in complete silence.


	63. XiCheng 60

Somehow.. The Jade had accepted his fate, no cuddling, each laying on one side of the bed as if nothing ever happened. It felt weird and wrong to him to the extent that he actually ended up staring at the ceiling for minutes. Lan Xichen was laying on his back and only ended up turning his head when he heard the younger one clearing his throat.

,,A-Cheng,.. Do you want me to get you something to drink..?"

,,Mh? No, I'm cold."

While Jiang Cheng had thought his strategy was perfect to give the other something back after fucking up at the end.. Even though he had brought his words out sounding rather bossy and normal, Lan Xichen only blinked twice and the words he said made it clear that he hadn't understood.

,,Do you want me to bring you one of the robes..? Or maybe there's another blanket somewhere.."

The younger one closed his eyes before throwing such a glare at the tamed god that just mentioned one flinched before he repeated what he had said already while making a clearly audible dot behind each of his words.

,,I. Am. Cold."

Lan Xichen blinked a few times. He needed so long to get the gist that the smaller male threw a "are you fucking serious" look at him before muttering under his breath.

,,Fine, forget it."

,,You want to-"

,,I. AM. SIMPLY. COLD. Don't get the wrong idea-"

Once the tamed god had finally understood, he spoke up in pure disbelief only for his speech to be cut off by Jiang Cheng's raised voice and another glare.. However, before the younger one could even finish his threat, Lan Xichen had already moved in lightning speed almost.

Jiang Cheng needed a few seconds to process what just happened.. He was now laying in the middle of the bed. On his side. With his head on the guys shoulder/chest area that he had just lost pretty much all important first times with. That guy had the arm wrapped around him from the side he was laying on. That guy was the guy he had just spilled a load out of happiness into from merely looking at his face. They were both guys. He was now the little spoon.... And he had gotten himself into that position.

The younger one was tense and motionless for a bit.. In truth, he was about to break free, because of some belated panic setting in and it just not being his thing.. However, just as he was about to speak up, the tamed god nuzzled his face into his hair while squeezing him so gently.. If happiness and content could make a person glow, no spot on the earth would probably need light that night. And, as much as Jiang Cheng absolutely and totally disliked the situation.. He couldn't move away after all, could he?

Telling himself that reassuring little lie, Jiang Cheng then made himself more comfortable,.. He even hesitantly wrapped one of his arms around the taller one himself without saying a word.

Minutes passed before Lan Xichen broke the silence, even with the exhaustion now being audible in his own tone as well and it being almost a whipser.. He sounded so overjoyed in his clear moment of more than likely believing he had already fallen asleep and was having a sweet dream.

,,I'm feeling so happy right now... my heart is beating like it has gone mad... A-Cheng.. thank you.."

The younger male didn't reply.. His eyes had widened a little, yet after a few moments where his own heart had began to beat strangely, he couldn't resist the temptation. Slowly Jiang Cheng moved his head, resting it on the spot where the Jade's.. Well, this time his eyes widened as far as they could, as soon as he had found the right spot. The taller ones heart was truly beating all over the place and as he heard it stop, probably from embarrassment, he let out a little hum and squeezed Lan Xichen gently.

After that the one born in Yunmeng closed his eyes and within minutes the heartbeat of his lover turned into a lullaby that made him sleep for the first time in far more than over a decade: without a bad dream, or stirring, or waking up at night.

Lan Xichen however needed a while longer to actually fall asleep. To him, once it had sunk in that he was allowed to cuddle it had already started to feel like he was dreaming. Due to that.. if he'd close his eyes - wouldn't he technically wake up in reality again?

It was unclear how much time had passed, yet sooner or later the tiredness began to take him over, making his eyelids feel heavier and heavier until they fell shut. Before that the Jade had ever so gently ran his hand through his lovers hair while glancing down at the scene every so often.. And just like Jiang Cheng, once he had truly fallen asleep the Lan Sect leader didn't stir a single time.. It was one of the first nights in forever that he slept without a bad dream - that would more often than not make him wake up with a start, drenched in sweat and out of breath.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end of the first XiCheng part/arc of this story.  
> 


	64. Wen Ning & The Juniors | 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prepare for them feels

As he was storming off, Jin Ling was between completely shaken up and.. knowing that he was so totally, absolutely screwed. He really had wished for the event to turn.. into something just mildly positive. If Jiang Cheng wouldn't be different to him, he wouldn't mind.. He just couldn't get it out of his head how his maternal uncle had looked in the temple, where so many things had happened.

How was a boy his age supposed to forget all of that? Jiang Cheng wasn't much of a help either, the few rather rare times they had met. The older one was either mad, or at least agitated, or depressed, or everything at once.. And whom did he lash out at the most?

Jin Ling just had had enough. He had enough of all the conversations that were clearly needed not happening. He was done with acting like nothing ever happened, no matter what it was. He was over playing a child, done with just watching in silence. That wasn't the future he wanted for himself. Not the one he wants for his uncle. Not one he'd wish for, for any of the parties involved.

He knew perfectly fine that he'd gone too far, that it was quite likely that he'd get a good beating later on.. It was just that, at the time of his outburst he couldn't remain silent anymore. He had always gotten shut off by his uncle when he tried to talk, so what other options did he have?

By now he wasn't even that young anymore himself, he wasn't officially an adult yet but time was running fast.. Just like he was, or well.. Jin Ling was walking so fast, tears from being so overly upset had welled up in his eyes. He wasn't even thinking clearly, as his hand kept clutching onto the handle of his fathers sword, while he walked and walked; further and further away from the Nie Sects residence - not that he planned to return that night.. maybe not at all.

,,Young Master Rulan..?"

Jin Ling had spend a good amount of time walking, before he sat down in front of quite the big, old tree without giving much about his lower half getting wet. He had spaced out, his head hidden against his knees that he in turned had pulled towards his chest.. For the fact that he didn't want to be like a child, or be seen as one and so on - He was not that much of an adult yet after all. At the end it was a voice that ripped him out of his moment of contemplating life choices.. As he looked up, Wen Ning was standing there - Had he.. followed him?

What Jin Ling couldn't know was that it wasn't only Wen Ning. The Lan Sect Juniors were close by as well, but after a bit of debating they had decided it would be best if not all of them came at him at once. If it would be necessary they would all just drag him back, but.. no one really wanted to deal with that mess of a situation either.

,,What's with that name again? Since the first time you've met me you're calling me like that."

The expressionless Wen Ning that was standing 2 foot in front of Jin Ling shifted his weight from one foot to another.. If he'd have been able to show expression his might've looked a bit like "I screwed up".

Staring at him red eyed, the temper of his uncle came through as Jin Ling spoke up in a tone that was more typical for him a few years prior.

,,If you got nothing to say then leave. It's disrespectful to stare at someone and not even answer to a simple question they have."

Wen Ning took half a step back, he didn't really know what to do.. or say. The younger one stared at him for a few moments more before letting out a kinda disgusted noise. After that Jin Ling shook his head and went about closing his eyes, once he leaned his head against the tree.

,,How much do you know.. about your family, young master?"

Even though he had hesitated, at the end Wen Ning still sat down in the middle of the snow - it wasn't like the cold mattered to him anyway.

,,They're all either dead, or cut sleeves, or were cut sleeves before dying and those that are left are to a huge extent freaks, or assholes. I guess that sums it up."

Within a few seconds Wen Ning could say that it clearly had been the mentally screwed over Jiang Cheng that raised this kid. It caused him to hesitate, yet at the end he spoke up anyway while Jin Ling stared at another tree as if he didn't care about anything at all - not that anyone would believe that for one second.

,,Young Master Jiang and your mother were raised in Yunmeng.. I don't know too much, but they seemed to have lived a rather good life. Young Master Wei however lost his parents and lived on the road for years. He had to fight with dogs over food, got bitten many times which is why he's so anxious around them... At some point your grandfather Jiang Fengmian took Young Master Wei in.. there were ugly rumours getting spread, but I don't know too much about how much they effected everything."

As hard as the boy had tried not to, sooner or later he couldn't help but turn his head to look at the expressionless ghost general. His own expression showed interest, yet also doubt and confusion,.. It was clear that he had trouble sorting out his mental mess.

,,Why are you telling me this? What are you even telling me, half the time you say "I don't know, I don't know"."

,,If you would just listen to me for a while then maybe you will understand."

,,Well, what choices do I have really anyway? If I'd try to get away from you, you'd just follow like Fairies replacement, wouldn't you? Where's my uncle, I expected him to run after me to rip me apart."

If Wen Ning would be able to sigh, he would probably do nothing but that for the next few hours - he already realised that right now, at the beginning of this night.


	65. Wen Ning & The Juniors | 2

,,Communication has always been a struggle within the Yunmeng Jiang Sect. You also inherited that trait, Young Master Rulan."

Even though Jin Ling couldn't understand the entirety of the statement yet at the time.. He also couldn't say that he had no clue whatsoever about what the ghost general meant and had to avert his gaze.

,,The original theme of the Yunmeng Jiang Sect was more or less to make the impossible possible.. While young master Wei had this natural talent, young master Jiang was never too fond of that. This motto always got the Yunmeng Jiang Sect.. or more young master Wei, in trouble.. Yet he was usually always well liked, even me.. I was used to getting bullied, left out and laughed at.. yet even after I ran to hide from him, he still went on to treat me normally and compliment me, put faith in me.."

,,... That sounds like the entire opposite of my uncle.."

Jin Ling said those words rather unintentionally while sounding quite spaced out, playing with the snow around him in between.

,,That is true.. But what is even more true than that is that neither of them is right, or was.. There is always a too much, if you don't find the balance..-"

,,You'll ultimately lose, no matter how genuine the intention."

Wen Ning nodded slowly in his stiff corpse manner. He was rather surprised how much the young one had matured since the first time they had met, that he even got what he was trying to say.

,,It is the same with the Lan Sect,.. but I'm in no place to talk about those matters. I'm not even alive anymore."

,,You're still a better man that my uncles.."

Jin Ling had hesitated, yet he couldn't stop himself from speaking the truth, that was simply that. This time the older one hesitated.

,,I'm missing bits and pieces of each story.. Yet due to Young Master Wei's good deeds, he ultimately caused the Yunmeng Jiang Sect to be destroyed.."

,,He pissed the wrong people off, I guess..?"

The older one of them nodded again.

,,It is tragic.. but when I heard about what was going to happen to your mother's sect.. The branch of the Wen Sect I was from, we were medics.. We arrived too late, everything had gone up in flames.. Piles of.. Piles of dead bodies everywhere, no one was left.. Neither your grandfather nor grandmother, not even the youngest of children or the weakest of disciples were left.."

Hearing the story, Jin Ling.. as hard as he tried to imagine - he couldn't. He had heard a lot, after all he was going to lead his own Sect soon and had to know.. But it only sank in now that his generation truly had it good. There were no actual wars, it was really more like a different world than just a few mere years apart. He also noticed that regardless of being dead, regardless of having killed so many, Wen Ning seemed to struggle with the events he was recalling.

,,Are you trying to say that you've never killed anyone? When you were alive I mean."

The younger one couldn't refrain from speaking up in a tone full of disbelief and some of the faint, still lingering hatred he had towards the ghost general.

,,I... I... That is something I can't say.. With my own hands, anyone of my branch has never killed with their own hands.. Yet.. I cannot say that we don't have blood on them, after all.. We did know about many things, yet did nothing due to what we swore.. Not each member of the Jiang Sect was dead when we arrived, but we didn't help them either.. Saving our own lifes.. If I would need to say so myself, was at the end already nothing but drenching our hands in blood.."

Wen Ning stared at the ground, he wasn't proud of this fact. None of the members of his branch had been proud of it. Even though they weren't "Wen's", at the end they were nothing but those Wen's.

,,That sounds more and more like.. There was no one truly guilty, nor innocent.."

,,That's because, simply turning a blind eye towards something everyone can see makes you more guilty than taking a step to end things."

,,Jingyi.."

Jin Ling's head shot up towards the direction where the familiar "know it all" voice of Lan Jingyi had come from - quickly followed from Lan Sizhui, who scolded him as always.

,,What are you guys doing here?!"

,,A certain Mistress ran away after making a scene. With your talent of pullng misfortune towards your being we couldn't just stay behind, could we?"

,,You fu-"

,,Both of you calm down! Jingyi, I'll put a silencing spell on you in a minute. Go, make the fire. Young Master Jin, I apologise."

While Jin Ling and Lan Jingyi had their typical little moment, Lan Sizhui sighed as he took a talisman to clear an area big enough for them all to sit on rather dry ground from the snow. After that, he sat down beside Wen Ning while Jingyi prepared the fire and Jin Ling glared at him.

,,It might not be my place to say so, but it would probably be best if we camp out tonight, so that everyone can calm down."

Sizhui spoke up again and while Jin Ling looked somewhat embarrassed, Jingyi of course couldn't shut his trap as he replied after snorting a laugh.

,,As if that's gonna save him."

,,There's no saving you in a minute!"

The situation turned overly heated within moments only, Jin Ling had yelled, Jingyi replied with a rather arrogant degrading noise and moments later they were rolling around on the ground. Wen Ning and Sizhui gave each other a glance, they'd just let them enjoy their brawl for the time being.. Honestly, they were both a pain and it would be funny to see how their elders would react to their torn clothes and battered selves the next day.


	66. Wen Ning & The Juniors | 3

,,We should go and look for something to eat. I doubt you had anything yet, Jin Ling."

At the end it was Sizhui who spoke up as the other 2 boys had by then collapsed on the ground, beside one another. In the meantime, the silent others had talked about small things like how Wen Ning's house was currently since they were renovating it. Or about the elders Wen Ning had helped out, the kids that still teased him a little but slowly treated him with more respect as well.

Those laying on the ground however just let out pained groans, which caused the more mature Junior to speak up again.

,,If you don't move after having stepped out of line so far, you won't hear anything further from Wen Ning."

Hearing that Jin Ling and Jingyi shot up in sync. It wasn't anything they'd like to admit having in common, but they both were actually rather interested in hearing more.. After glaring at each other and glancing at Wen Ning, who really didn't seem like he'd say another word under the current circumstences, they both - yet again in sync - let out a defeated sounding "Fine" before walking off in different directions.

,,They are truly a combo that'll gift me the first grey hair, probably tonight.."

Sizhui said in between of letting out the heaviest of breaths, running his hands over his face at the end of his speech.

,,Your forehead ribbon.."

The younger one looked at his uncle, yet before he was able to fix it himself Wen Ning had already moved and gently pulled it back in place.

,,Are you alright?"

Wen Ning asked, it was sad that his tone couldn't change a lot, just like his expression to make the care he felt audible, or at least visible.. However, the younger one smiled and nodded before replying.

,,I am, the studies are going well.. The journey left me feeling a little exhausted, but by now it can be those 2 as well.. How are you? What are you trying to tell him?"

For a moment Wen Ning hesitated before answering honestly.

,,I am unsure.. I know something, yet I'm unsure if I should tell young master Rulan before young master Jiang has told young master Wei about it.. All I want is for young master Rulan to understand his family better.. He doesn't have many family members left.. He shouldn't come to hate his only relative because of a flaw in how young master Jiang and young master Wei were raised.."

Lan Sizhui remained silent, running the words of his own relative through his mind - after a while he slowly nodded in agreement. Neither of them could further talk about those matters though, because the 2 that had used one another as punching bags came back.

At the end, after examining their findings for a good few minutes.. it turned out that not even half of them were actually edible. As well as that the remaining ones, that were mostly found from Jingyi, were making up for that. However, of course the rather temperamental Lan Sect Junior couldn't let that slide without making a comment.

,,Just because you have enough money that you use however you please, probably also to get yourself a personal cook on nighthunts, doesn't mean you shouldn't know how to survive in the wilderness at all."

,,Jingyi, in comparison to how much we have learned in both studies, as well as from Master Wei, you're really the last to speak such words. Now sit down you two and let Wen Ning talk while we prepare the food."

Before it could escalate again Sizhui had made his prior warning reality: As much as he tried, Jingyi couldn't open his mouth any longer.. And Jin Ling, as full of temperament as he was as well, he knew that feeling and rather shut up then to go through the silencing spell again.

,,You can continue your story now, I don't think there'll be any further interruptions of such kind."

Honestly, Wen Ning didn't know if he wanted to dare say another thing in front of his nephew after the last incident.. It was a bit of his human side from the better days acting up. At the end, he did continue his speech while Jingyi was preparing the food - not without needing the guidance of Sizhui more often than not. In between Jin Ling sat there silently, quite wide eyed as well.

,,As I said before.. The entirety of the Lotus Pier was.. destroyed. My Sects branch arrived, mostly to look after the Wen's of the main branch, yet we weren't allowed to help those of the Jiang Sect - that would've been able to survive. We could only stand there and watch as everything got engulfed by flames. The only ray of hope was when the voices grew louder, until it was confirmed that young master Wei and young master Jiang weren't there."

,,Something like that must be horrible. I can't imagine losing everything at once.."

Jingyi spoke up, only realising a moment later that the spell had been lifted. Sizhui remained silent, he couldn't let anyone know about his true self.. Only Jin Ling sat there with his expression twisting from horror to a confused kind of rage - which matched the tone in which he spoke up then as well.

,,That's horribble yeh.. but shouldn't my uncle still be glad? He had everything once. Even though he has lost it, shouldn't he sooner or later grow thankful for having had all of that? Parents, a home, siblings,.."

At this point all others hesitated and exchanged glances, what were they supposed to say.. The only 2 that understood were Wen Ning and Sizhui, yet the latter wouldn't be able to speak up.

,,That, young master Rulan.. is a question that humanity still needs to find an answer to.. because there is no correct one. What is worse: Losing everything dear to you after many years - or never having it in the first place..? I wouldn't say that you're necessarily wrong, young master.. but as far as I know, from rumours and seeing things with my own eyes.. Young master Jiang was never alone, even if a troublesome one - he had an overly close bond to his siblings.."

The juniors stopped in their motions to split up the food that was ready by then.. their heads dropped slightly, this time none of them could truly grasp the amount of pain, nor imagine how they would've turned out or reacted themselves. Wen Ning in turn gave them, as well as himself a moment to stomach all of that.


	67. Wen Ning & The Juniors | 4

,,Even though it might be a bit of a time skip.. After the attack of the Jin Sect, where both.. your father and others died, Young Master Rulan.. My sister and I gave ourselves up, we handed ourselves in to the other sects that wanted to see Young Master Wei dead for my deeds... I.. I watched my sister who had never injured anyone die.. I won't go much into detail, more for you young masters sakes.."

While Wen Ning was unable to properly show or make audible how he felt.. It was the entire opposite for the three juniors. Even though Jin Lings expression at first showed pain and anger from the mentioning of his father's death - hearing the end of the others speech.. his jaw dropped. Jingyi in turn sank down on the ground, the only thing the three had in common was that they all paled. Sizhui, let's just say, even though his memories about Wen Qing were faint, a blur.. He got up and excused himself to get water for them to drink.

Minutes passed before the boy in the golden robes spoke up in a somewhat weak, a little less loud tone while staring into the fire.

,,What I never got to know.. How did you die?"

It was rather faint and hard to see that Wen Ning had shrugged. It didn't really matter.. did it?

,,I never heard that story either.."

,,That's because in most cases for people it doesn't matter how you ended up a certain way. Nothing matters but the things you do, mostly the bad ones at that."

Wen Ning spoke up once Jingyi had joined into the try to pull some bits and pieces of the story out of him.. As he looked up he could clearly see that the boys were realising something bit for bit - something they hadn't been taught by anyone: Being human. The hardest thing to learn and remain in the whole timespan of ones life.

,,I can't speak for the Lan's, but I've never heard of certain things.. There was always nothing explained, but the end results - not how things turned out a certain way.. Like a scary story to keep you away without being explained, or entirely true.."

,,We have nothing but rules that honestly prevent you from being human a lot.. you'll get them branded in your head, until almost all uniqueness is erased.."

,,Jingyi, you're making our sect sound so horrible.."

Lan Sizhui spoke up, he had just come back with the water as his fellow sect member said those.. harsh words that he couldn't entirely disagree with, without being dishonest - in silence of course.

,,If you'd be honest for a moment Sizhui, isn't it? Isn't it wrong? Just because we're young doesn't mean we can always turn a blind eye to reality. Especially because we are the youth, the next generation we shouldn't. Just like we, the youth, shouldn't be underestimated or sold as dumb."

None of them could really disagree with the words Jingyi had said.. At the end, Wen Ning joined in again while the boys gazes were fixed on the fire.

,,Even though it might not be the best choice to say so.. Regardless of your temper being rather troublesome, Young Master Jingyi, I think I have to agree with your words.. Thinking back, if our generation of youths many years ago would've stepped up as a whole, or said something instead of just going along with whatever our sects thought was right.. I can't say how many things would've changed.."

,,For now.. How does the story of my uncles.. I mean.. my uncle and Wei Wuxian continue..?"

While Jingyi and Jin Ling looked at the ghost general with a lot of curiosity visible in their young eyes.. his nephew glanced at Wen Ning to try and see what decision was made by then. Wen Ning however hesitated, for a minute maybe, before he continued the long lost tale.

,,I.. I can't tell you everything. There are matters young master Jiang needs to come clean with himself still.. I've already inserted myself in others stories far too much, it wouldn't be fair to go any further..-"

,,I think I know what you mean, gho-.. I mean Wen Ning.."

While the two Lan's seemed rather confused, the youngest ones eyes widened as he interrupted their seniors speech - which in turn caused Wen Ning, Sizhui and Jingyi to stare at him wide eyed. Jin Ling got a little flustered and continued to ramble on for a bit longer.

,,I mean.. Not really, but.. In the Guanyin Temple, or ever since then.. my uncle has behaved strangely.. He clearly wanted to talk to Wei Wuxian, yet has never done so until now. I'm quite preoccupied with studies, preperations to take over my fathers sect.. but when I see him he more often than not seems to be lost in thought.. depressed, agitated, angered, which reached it's highest point since quite a while earlier as we arrived.."

,,Are you sure it's not just 'cause it would damage his bad image if he should build a snowman with his nephew? Or maybe the fact that he's running out of time to get married and so on?"

Jingyi couldn't help but snort a laugh at the beginning and end of his thrown in comment, which over all only caused him to get glared at by Sizhui while.. poor Jin Ling's face went from bright red to green before he blurted out in a disgusted as hell tone.

,,The last thing on earth I want to think about is my uncles sex life, or marriage, or.. Can we just.. Never talk about that again? Apart from that, he's banned from every single girl available, so he'll more than likely die alone - as if anyone would be able to put up with him."

It was the first time ever since they got to know each other that Jingyi began to laugh so loudly, and Jin Ling soon joined in. It was just as disgusting of a thought, as it was hilarious all together.. In truth, not even Sizhui could stop himself from laughing behind his fist, that he used to cover his mouth with.


	68. Wen Ning & The Juniors | 5

,,No, but.. Let's be serious for a moment.. Who would be able to actually cope with his moods? What type of person would that need to be..? Someone who's trapped in a constant state of meditation, all peaceful and.."

Jingyi couldn't even finish his speech. By the time his voice broke from all the laughter the three juniors were actually rolling around on the floor, holding their stomachs - Wen Ning was meanwhile really hoping for Jiang Cheng, the victim of their childish moment, to not appear out of nowhere.

,,Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.. My uncle even has an entire list of requirements for his partner!"

Jin Ling stopped rolling around in the middle of his fit of laughter, staring at the sky that was darkening at this point - the two Lan's stopped in an instant as well and scooted closer to him, exclaiming both at the same time, in the same tone full of disbelief.

,,No way?!"

The youngest nodded, he had somehow ended up with the Lan's kneeling each on one side beside his head, staring down at him wide eyes as anything. Even though the Ghost General didn't speak up, because he enjoyed the little bonding moment, he knew about the rumours of the sacred list.

,,Give me a second.. I have to see if I can get it all together.."

Jin Ling said as he lifted one of his hands up in the air, staring at the sky while beginning to count.. It took a few moments before he thought he had recalled all points and then he spoke up again.. not without acting out his uncles usual behaviour in between and badly faking his tone as well.

,,My partner has to be naturally beautiful, of course. I wouldn't settle for anything less. Apart from that, the person has to be graceful and obedient.. But hardworking as well and thrifty. As the Jiang Sect leader, of course my partner would need to come from a respected family, yet their cultivational level shouldn't be too high. It can't be that I'm overshadowed after all. Personality shouldn't be too strong, they shouldn't have too much of a mind of their own, or else we're going to do nothing but clash. My partner also shouldn't be too talkative, at best mute so we get into even less fights. Their voice also shouldn't be too loud - It would be troublesome if neither of us could calm their inner demons... They also shouldn't throw around with their own, or even better my money. And they must treat Jin Ling nicely."

All three of the kids could barely refrain from bursting into a fit of laughter, that the youngest of them even acted it out just made it that much harder not to do so. Once Jin Ling's moment was over however, their self-control vanished entirely and they spend a good few minutes rolling on the floor again. They were laughing so loudly that they couldn't breath and had to hold their stomachs while this time Sizhui couldn't refrain from making a comment.

,,What.. What is that?!"

The battered looking Jingyi was slamminig his hand onto the frozen grass, choking before blurting out.

,,So basically we just need to find someone blind, deaf and mute who looks pretty and treats you nice and that's it? But what kind of nice anyway? With how he treats you that could mean his type of nice as well.."

Like before they spend another good amount of time laughing their heads off before Sizhui stopped in the middle of half a roll. Propping himself on the side, he stared wide eyed at the two that were laying side by side on their backs on his left. As he spoke up his tone was slightly loud, the typical realisation type of tone mixed with this vibe of it being overly forbidden in it.

,,Wait.. doesn't that.. oh my goodness.. doesn't that totally sound like Nie Huaisang..?!"

Jingyi and Jin Ling's jaws dropped as they stared at the oldest Junior for a few seconds, then at each other before they all bursted out again even harder than before - the imagination was just gold.

,,Shit.. If we would've noticed that earlier you could've countered your uncles attack with "No I wanted to come here 'cause he's your perfect match".."

,,I'm dying.."

At the end they had reached a point where they couldn't even laugh anymore after Jingyi had spoken.. Sizhui and Jin Ling could only say what they were feeling like: They felt like they were going to die from laughter. After a while of them trying to calm down though.. Sizhui spoke up again, in an almost gone out tone.

,,But.. doesn't it.. Doesn't it kind of sound like Zewu-Jun as well..?"

No one laughed this time, the realisation was sinking in so deep and paralysed all of them - even Wen Ning, who had been poking around in the fire with a wooden stick, stopped moving in an instant. It sounded so surreal, yet plausible that after minutes when Jin Ling spoke up.. Even though he tried to rip the idea apart, his voice was heavy from how little weight his own argument had.

,,Yeh... But he isn't weak when it comes to cultivation.. so.."

A bit more silence lingered before Jingyi this time spoke up, his tone was just as weirdly hesitant and shaken up, yet his argument - to them - seemed to have a lot more reason and weight.

,,Ignoring that.. As much as it sounds plausible.. Don't they both have to marry a maiden and get children, so their sects will continue to run in the main blood line..? Zewu-Jun still has you Shizui, but.."

,,.. But my uncle only has me and I already have to take over my fathers sect.."

The Juniors nodded slowly to themselves. There was such a strange wave of extreme relief coming over them that they began to throw anything that could debunk their idea around - in no special order, more often than not they'd finish one anothers words and so on.

,,Yeh, not only that but-"

,,- has anyone ever heard of either of them being cut sleeves?"

,,My uncle openly voices his dislike towards them, so.."

,,And it's not like they've-"

,,- ever been close or anything."

,,How should that suddenly happen?"

,,It's not like they're ever alone together..-"

,,- And even if, they've known each other for so long.."

They ended this mess of a speech with saying in sync while feeling overly restless inside.

,,As if there'd ever happen anything between them.."

All juniors nodded again, this time overly quickly before Jin Ling spoke again while sitting up.

,,Let's just act like we've never talked about that.. I'm feeling something strange, just thinking about it.."

Again, all nodded before they went about eating in complete silence - dealing with their shock and this strange sensation of having cast a bad spell each on their own.


	69. Wen Ning & The Juniors | 6

,,Master Wen.. How does the story continue..?"

Jin Ling only dared to speak up again after a long time. They had been weirdly paralysed until then and staring at nothing, yet something at the same time. While Wen Ning looked at the youngest, the two other Juniors eyes got fixed on the Ghost General that soon began to continue his speech.

,,I only got to know after a while that the secret had been revealed in front of all of you in the temple.. When the main branch of my sect had realised that Young Master Jiang and Young Master Wei weren't underneath the victims.. They send out search teams, it was nothing but a man hunt.. Young Master Jiang didn't even matter so much... it might be rude to say, but he wasn't the strongest. It didn't matter to them if he would die or stay alive, there wasn't much in their eyes that he'd be able to do to harm them.."

The oldest of the four stopped talking as he noticed that the Juniors all together needed a moment to let the information sink in. It was so visible that they couldn't believe the Sandu Shengshou that they all secretly feared deep down inside had been.. so strengthless once that he wasn't even worthy getting eliminated before he'd be able to cause havoc.

,,Was my uncle that weak..?"

Jin Ling ended up asking what the other Juniors were thinking as well, yet Wen Ning hesitated before shaking his head in his clumsy, stiff manner.

,,I'm going to say it for all three of you young masters.. True weakness stems from within the heart.. No matter the things you'd be capable to do, or the strength you truly have - you won't be able to use it, if you don't believe in yourself.."

,,But..-"

,,Jin Ling, I think master Wen is trying to imply that your uncles behaviour is a facade.."

Sizhui spoke up as he noticed the youngest struggle to fully understand the Generals words. It didn't make sense to the Jin Sect successor, it sounded so overly surreal.

,,As hard as it may be to believe, young master Rulan.. When I was alive, I was a good for nothing, like Nie Huaisang is called nowadays. Young Master Wei saw me shoot a arrow, after he stood up for me at a event of the Wen Sect.. He said I was one of the best four when it comes to using a bow, yet when I was supposed to shoot one to proof this.. I was a person full of fear and self-doubt, I didn't even slightly hit the target.."

,,Are you trying to teach us that everyone is different and has their weaknesses?"

Wen Ning nodded as Jingyi had spoken up, the youths were getting the underline of all that he said rather quick.

,,Not only that but also that no matter how a person may act, you can't know what is truly going on beneath the facade. Or what the reason for a persons behaviour is. Or that there is always more than just what meets the eye in each story, in each persons life."

It had taken quite the extended period of time before the Ghost General had slowly began to warm up more to talking with others.. However, after being on a night hunt with the Juniors so often, regular contact with them and especially Sizhui - It had turned easier and easier, yet this was the first time where he so openly inserted himself in the picture of teaching them. He had.. more or less waited for those in charge of them to do so, but right now it just felt like the time for them had come to learn how much more there was to life, cultivation and people.

,,Your uncle lost his core, because of something I won't tell.. It isn't my place to do so, not before he has talked to Young Master Wei himself.. What I can tell is that he arrived with several guards, he got beaten up, branded and robbed from his golden core before being thrown away and left to die."

It wasn't only Jin Ling who paled, all three of the Juniors did.. yet for the youngest it of course hit far, far deeper to hear all of that. None of them could say a word really.

,,Not long after Young Master Wei arrived.. I saw him collect Young Master Jiang, and I helped them hide.. My sister noticed it quickly, she threw a fit because of the danger I put us in, but.."

,,She had sworn something.. She couldn't just let someone die, or more than those she had already been forced to let die.."

Sizhui said in a heavy hearted tone, he could do so right now without blowing his cover since they all felt the same. However, one of his hands that wasn't visible to the other Juniors was clenched into a fist.

The youngest of the disciples couldn't just take it like that though.. He raised his voice as the confusion and messed up feelings inside of him made him grow impatient and agitated - just like his uncle.

,,But that's not possible.. My uncle has a core and there's no such a thing as a operation to.. transplant one.."

,,There is.. No, there was just one person that could do it. It was the first time that such an operation actually happened and wasn't only discussed in theory. My sister could do it, and she did - even though she didn't want to do it."

,,That's not surprising.. As a medic she was supposed to save people's life's, not unnecessarily destroy them which.. the extraction of a golden core would be, wouldn't it?"

Jingyi had joined in, only when he felt like he could actually somewhat contribute to the conversation that had been going on between Jin Ling and Wen Ning. While the youngest was almost trapped into a slight state of shock, Wen Ning and Sizhui both nodded before the senior explained further.

,,I have to say that the entire procedure is.. inhumane. While it is an option in cases like Young Master Jiang's and Young Master Wei's.. The core extraction can only be successful when the giver is completely conscious, pain medication or other types could damage the core in the process.. It takes days for the op to be completed, and afterwards.. The individual that gave up their core, can never again form a new one."


	70. Wen Ning & The Juniors | 7

All three of the Juniors shivered so badly at the imagination that they wrapped their arms around themselves. None could really decide what was worse, being tortured for days and nights by full consciousness, or turned into a nothing due to being unable to form a core ever again. It hit especially deep though for Sizhui and the youngest disciple.

,,This is.. so horrible.."

,,.. At the same time,.. How deep must've been the bond between Master Wei and Sandu Shengshou back in the day.."

Jingyi was the first to break the silence, followed from his other Sect member - And as if they all hadn't been lost in thought enough already, the Ghost General threw in a question that would stick with them and let them grow even more silent.

,,Does any of you young Masters have one person you would do the same for?"

After a while of staring at the ground the boys glanced at one another, neither could find an answer, yet Jin Ling spoke up then with a tone so similiar to a true sect leaders - all grown up, serious and proud.

..We might not have such a bond yet with anyone, but we as youth shouldn't be underestimated. We will find a bond, we don't need to have the same as others. We are ourselves, not our ancestors. While back then such things needed to happen, we're not born to make history repeat itself."

The speech was such a catching moment for the two Lan Sect Juniors that Jingyi also joined in - they were all getting quite hyped up somehow.

,,That's right! We are us. We are the future. We can change things, make a difference and first of all: We have to make our own paths. Write our own stories!"

Just like a few times before the boys all nodded repeatedly and quickly - as if they had just experienced some sort of awakening moment that hadn't happened in the world's history before.

,,We should make a plan to make others realise that as well.. What would be the best way to make them listen..?"

,,How about we talk to our elders that are currently present..?"

The two Lan's exchanged a few words and glances before Jin Ling chuckled nervously - making them all recall what just happened, by then hours ago.

,,We're on the same side! Hanguang-Jun and Zewu-Jun seem to be working on a plan as well.. Apart from that, if we talk to them at the same time, in the same room Sandu Shengshou wouldn't dare lay a hand on you. And also, you're going to be a sect leader once you've had your next birthday aren't you?"

Jin Ling was a bit hesitant and pale, yet he did cave in and nod since.. How would it look if he'd run away now while he'd soon have to face his uncle as a fellow sect leader anyway? Especially in front of Jingyi who had been the last to encourage him he didn't want to lose face.

,,What if they don't listen though..?"

The one to speak was Jin Ling this time, all of their sects were rather stubborn so what was the chance for anything to actually work out..?

,,You three are using the same phrase over and over again since a while.. Why not try out something new that I haven't seen before and make a hymn for the new generation?"

Hearing those words of Wen Ning who they had kinda forgotten about the kids went from staring at the senior, to staring at one another while running things through their minds.

Some time passed before the Juniors began to talk all over the place. They were weirdly hyped about the idea of making a song, which none of them had heard of someone else doing before. Bit by bit they came up with the text, threw lines out, added new ones again - somehow the Lan's had a few spare pieces of paper and something to write - literally - up their sleeves. Lan Sizhui was put in charge of coming up with the basic melody with his guqin..

They spend most of the night coming up with ideas, writing the song and re-doing things.. Wen Ning was meanwhile making sure they were safe and that the fire wouldn't go out, every so often the youngsters would ask him for his opinion before going back to be entirely engrossed in their little plan.

At the end the three boys fell asleep leaning against one another with their backs against a tree. Jin Ling was in the middle, while the Lan disciples framed him with their heads resting on his shoulders. It was far too much of an adorable scene.. And if someone would look closely enough, they all had a bit of a proud and satisfied smile on their face.

For a moment, Wen Ning could feel something.. He could feel that those three boys would go on to do great things in their lifes. Alone and together.. And who knew.. maybe they would turn into sworn brothers one day.


	71. Wen Ning & The Juniors | Final

The Juniors had been asleep for quite a while, if it wouldn't be in the middle of winter the sun would've already rose by then. Regardless of that, Jin Ling began to stir, it was one of those strange moments where you feel uneasy no matter how deep asleep you were - Like this gut feeling that you may have forgotten something you needed to do. After a few moments, his eyes barely open, he spoke up in this overly tired tone.

,,You.. You didn't answer all of our questions.."

Even though Wen Ning wasn't really able to sleep, he had moved and was by now leaning against a tree with his eyes closed himself. As he heard the youngest ones voice however, he looked at the boy and when he didn't reply Jin Ling went about repeating the questions he meant.

,,You neither told us.. how you died.. nor did you tell me what's with my name.."

,,My death doesn't matter.. Your name however.. Young Master Wei was the one to name you.. Your father agreed to that on request of your mother.."

Jin Lings eyes widened, yet it was incredibly hard to tell if it was more out of surprise, or because of pain.. Or well, that was the case until he asked something he didn't really need a reply to any longer, in a barely audible, almost choked sounding tone.

,,Were they really that close..?"

,,If I'd need to say so myself.. I think there is no person that loved Young Master Wei as much as your mother.. Even though I have to say as well that.. Young Master Jiang also truly loved him.."

The older one spoke carefully, using a lot of his strength to get his voice to make it even the tiniest bit noticeable that he wasn't only honest, but also feeling for the other.. But as Jin Ling said his next few words before he couldn't say any more Wen Ning knew that if he'd be able to feel something still it would be the same he had felt as his sister was dying right beside him.

,,But then why..."

,,Young Master Wei gave up his golden core without telling anyone.. Even though he was the main force against the Wen Sect, at the end.. You're only loved when you're on the side of the winner, if you turn against them.. like Young Master Wei did to protect us "innocent Wen's".. More and more bad things happened, my death as I got to know one day was one of the main reasons why he began to lose control.. At the end as that happened, I was the one to end your fathers life by accident because of the immense amount of negative emotions I had felt in my life.. Also because of the way I died.."

Wen Ning had hesitated, yet at the end he still told the young boy at least a few bits and pieces, just so he would maybe find some peace within himself as well.

,,Many wanted to see Young Master Wei dead after that and the battle at the nightless city happened.. Everyone turned against us, Young Master Wei lost control again and.. Your mother must've known, or gotten to know because she appeared in a desperate attempt to stop this massacre.. Young Master Wei stopped even the last of us corpses within seconds, yet your mother had already gotten injured.. At this point she might've survived still, yet... Someone attacked Young Master Wei and your mother pushed him away and ultimately... Until now we don't know what words she still wanted to say to Young Master Wei.."

What neither of the two communicating ones realised was that Sizhui had actually woken up, yet kept his eyes closed and was listening without making a noise. For a moment both Lan's, even the fast asleep Jingyi, could feel Jin Ling move.. or more shake and sob before his head dropped. As a natural reaction both Lan's wrapped their arms around him, while Sizhui knew the youngest wouldn't accept such comfort if he'd make it noticeable that he was awake.. Jingyi didn't know what he was doing, regardless of his tough behaviour he actually had a habit of clinging to things - or in this case people - when being asleep.

,,It's not fair.. why was I robbed of even the tiniest chance of spending time with, or getting to know my parents for.. for fucking nothing.."

,,The world we live in is a cruel place.. Yet, Young Master Rulan.. if you want to hate someone.. Please hate me. Don't hate the person that your family loved and loves so dearly.. If the hatred keeps lingering, all chances for your bonds to grow and for both you and Young Master Jiang to have a family one day will grow slimmer and slimmer until they'll one day disappear. Even I will die again one day, we all will.. It is up to us what we do with our lifetime and.. No one would want their child to succumb to hatred and pain.."

,,I know that.. it's just... How am I supposed to let go of something I never truly had..?! Even though I never truly had parents, whenever I think of them.. I can feel that there is something so huge missing, something I have felt once but can't recall.. It's like dying,.."

,,.. You should try to sleep some more.. I know that it has been a lot to take in.. At this rate you're just going to get more and more agitated.."

The quite heartbreaking conversation between Wen Ning and Jin Ling had continued for a while longer.. Even Sizhui sooner or later had to fight against some tears, because of how torn to pieces the youngest ones voice sounded.

A bit of time passed during which Jin Ling kept silently sobbing and crying,.. As much as the Ghost General wanted to, he didn't feel like he was the right person to actually go and comfort the boy. However, the tiredness of the new slight breakdown made the one dressed in gold almost faint, or collapse into a deep and dreamless slumber - It was only then that Sizhui was able to fall asleep again himself.

At the end the boys weren't the first to wake up in the "morning. Even though the Lan's were used to wake up the latest at 7am, usually 5am was their time, they slept until around 9am this day. Jin Ling then woke up a bit later, due to all the noise the other 3 were making with all the chatting while making food. They didn't go back to the Nie Sect's residence until half the day was over, not until they had gone through their plans a few more times. Once they arrived back, they seperated and each went into his room, took a bath and while the two Lan boys went out to their snowmans.. Jin Ling only dared to join them after looking out of his door and window several times, to make sure his uncle wasn't around.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just gonna say: It's possible I forgot to edit Sizhui's name. I messed it up 'cause my Naruto fan brain wants to write "Shisui" instead but I noticed and tried to change my mishaps of writing the H too early xD


	72. WangXian | 1

Wei Wuxian didn't have much time to regret leaving his brother-in-law in Jiang Cheng's care.. He got dragged into his and Lan Wangji's room without getting even the slightest hint of a reply from his husband. It wasn't like the taller one was ever overly talkative, yet not even a "Mmh" or so as response, adding together with the tight grip around his wrist and how fast the other walked - it was extremely off.

,,Lan Zhan, what's wrong..? Why are you treating me so roughly now again? I wasn't playing for Wen Ning-"

Instead of a reply the former feared Patriarch got dragged into the bedroom, and his try to have a conversation got cut off from the fact that he got pretty much thrown onto the bed. Letting out a slight pained noise, the younger one felt the faintest hint of hesitation going out from the other; before just mentioned one began to undress.

,,So you just want to have sex now and make me shut up?"

,,... If you do not understand on your own, there is no need for words."

Wei Wuxian blinked, even finally getting a response of his other half really didn't help. It was rare that he tried to search a conversation instead of running from something with sex, but right now.. Especially after witnessing the scene between Jiang Cheng and Jin Ling, he was quite unsure if he should do so.

,,Fine. If you don't want to talk, then there's also no need for us to have sex when I don't want to have it."

Lan Wangji, who had just been about to strip down his lower garment, stopped. For a few seconds he stared at his husband with this impossible to read facial expression of his.. Saying that he was shocked would be a true understatement, it was one of the first times - if not the actual first time - that Wei Ying went and completely turned sexual pleasure down.

Until then, no matter what had happened - even if he hadn't agreed fully - Wei Wuxian would always cave in, or search the escape from a tricky situation with sexual advances himself. Right now however, the older male could actually see and hear that his other half was dead serious.

More to confirm it, because of it being so out of character, the taller one took a step closer to the bed - just for Wei WuXian to turn away from him.

The only time that either of them had completely turned the other down with physical actions was when Lan Wangji threw Wei Wuxian off of himself in the inn during their first sexual encounter.

It hit. It didn't only hit for the older one of them either, yet Lan Zhan was the one at the end to actually leave the room without saying a word.

Wei Wuxian spend quite a while waiting, he didn't hear another door getting opened and closed so he doubted that his husband had really left.. Yet even if Lan Wangji wasn't entirely gone, the distance between them that had formed out of nowhere felt like they were endless miles apart.

At the end the smaller male curled himself up on the bed, he didn't even bother getting undressed and simply laid on his side. Some time passed with him staring at the wall beside the bed, he was still waiting.. but sooner or later, he didn't even notice himself drift off and fall asleep - for once without the one he loved by his side.

Lan Wangji in turn spend most of the time.. trying to calm himself down, wrap his head around the reality that they had found themselves in - and for once he was so shaken up that he drank a glass more. He only went back into the bedroom once he believed that he wasn't as agitated, or over the problem he had had - Which turned out to be quite the mistake.

The younger one of them woke up a few minutes after Lan Wangji had joined him. He had felt the arms wrap around him, getting pulled closer and then how his other half nuzzled against his hair. For a moment or two Wei Ying enjoyed the little scene before he slowly began to turn around so they would be able to face one another. Scanning the older males face, the former Yiling Patriarch spoke up in a soft, slightly drowsy tone.

,,Did you calm down, Lan Zhan?"

,,I think so.."

The taller males reply came a little late, yet at least it came at all.

,,Then.. Let's make up with a kiss for now. Just a kiss though!"

Wei Wuxian said, grinning a little with his tone between serious and playful. They both should've known it better though.. That their bodies were so used to one another and almost each day ending in sexual pleasure of some kind. They were actually so used to one another that just moments into the soft, rather gentle kiss they began to lose track of "Just a kiss".

No matter what.. At the end of the day they were still as madly all over each other and in love like they were the first few weeks into their relationship. Within no time Lan Wangji's free hand found its way to roughly grab his lovers ass while pulling him closer at the same time. The kiss deepened, tongues got involved as their breathing grew heavy and lengths hard just from pure anticipation for more.

Only a bit of time passed before Wei Wuxian reached between them and began to caress the almost entirely erect length of his other half through the clothing. His mind had already gotten taken over as Lan Wangji's breathing hitched, his body tensed - it was clear that the older male was aching badly for relief to react that quickly after so many years of them being together. And it only got further confirmed as Lan Zhan broke the kiss only to say in a low, shaky and desperate tone.

,,I want you.."

Like always, Wei Ying simply couldn't refuse.. Especially not when his husband was using words to coax him into it. There wasn't even any need for more words, the younger male simply looked into the others eyes and they both knew it was a "I want you too".

Everything after happened far too quickly: Lan Wangji stripped them both down, not even bothering to get rid of the younger ones undergarment. The next thing Wei Ying knew was that he was pinned down on the bed, both of his wrists held in place by his husbands hand who was already hovering between his legs. Their lips then clashed together and they both moan into the kiss full of hunger, yet little control.


	73. WangXian | 2

Other than what most might think, their sex life was actually rather monotone. They had learned quite a few different positions throughout the around 2 years.. yet they mostly ended up using 3 different ones. It was either Wei Ying sitting on his lovers lap, the other between his legs, or the younger one getting done from behind while bending over.

They had never even talked about switching roles,.. Nor did Lan Wangji use his mouth or hands often to please his other half - even less his mouth that he had maybe used twice until then. It wasn't that much different the other way around, yet Wei Wuxian used his mouth on the older male quite more frequently - even though they mostly ended up just having the real deal with almost no foreplay, due to being too much into one another to waste time.

It wasn't any different this time.. After spending a few minutes with kissing, only to get more heated, Lan Wangji broke the kiss to barely use any spit to lube up his lovers aching muscles. They simply had grown used to the routine of Lan Wangji's lust doing most of the lubing job, mostly thanks to their impatience.

Everything from there on actually went rather normal. The older male thrusted in, here and there they would kiss in between as the thrusting motions got picked up. It was like always rather rough, Wei Wuxian was rather loud as his prostate got hit and his body bitten and bruised because of the lack of control his husband had over his strenth. But regardless of that, it wasn't anything unusual, the bruises were mostly superficial and many would probably think "Oh that's nothing"....

However, after an hour maybe.. Things took a turn for the worst as the taller one of them stared down at his other half and the flicker of several memories popped up in his mind. Trapped within the heat of the moment Lan Wangji could control his rage even less.. His thrusts turned out so hard that Wei Wuxian teared up. The smaller males try to push the other off was stopped by the other forcing his hands back down on the sheets, the grip way too hard.

It was the first time that things went that far out of control. There had never been much control when they were at it, yet.. What their brothers had heard in the room so many metres away happened: Wei Wuxian yelled in this pained tone, so loudly while tears streamed down on his face. For once he hated it that the pleasure kept coming regardless.

,,Oh fuck.. Lan Zhan, not so hard... Er-Gege.."

Lan Wangji didn't listen, a switch had flipped over in his head. Instead of stopping the outcry of his husband only made him go harder until.. He felt a kick in his stomach area, hard enough to actually make him crash from the bed into the wall in front of it.

The former Yiling Patriarch had always dealt with the way they were making love.. But this time there had been a voice inside of his head yelling at him that if he wouldn't make them stop - they'd either regret it already now, or even more if things kept continuing this way and there'd be a next time. He didn't even intend to kick so hard, it wasn't like he had a overly strong body, yet he somehow brought up that much strength.

Wei Ying couldn't look at his husband, he didn't want to look at him. He could barely even curl himself up in a ball, turned on the side due to all the pain he was feeling - on the inside even more than physically. One of his wrists hurt more than the other, so he was pressing the right aching one to his chest with his left. Yet another first time was that he was feeling a stinging, bad kind of pain from where their bodies had turned into one.

While the younger male was trying to deal with the pain he was feeling.. Lan Zhan needed a few moments to wrap his head around what just happened. He was completely gone out, needed to blink repeatedly as he looked around to see himself sit on the floor - Only seconds later did the crying noises of his husband sink in. He had been drunk, he could barely even recall what had happened yet after a moment he spoke in a broken tone that was barely anything more than a whisper and so full of worry and guilt at the same time.

,,Wei Ying.."

,,We can't..."

Wei Wuxian was shaking, not out of fear but simply shock. He couldn't even finish what he wanted to say, his voice sounding terrible enough for him to hear it clearly himself.

,,Do you.. Do you want me to leave..?"

While his husband wasn't actually scared, Lan Wangji was. He was getting swallowed by fear to the extent that he almost asked if his other half wanted to end things between them.. Yet he stopped himself, too afraid to actually have it confirmed.

,,No.. We just.... We can't continue this way.."

Even after hearing those words, the older male was unsure if he should feel relieved or not - If he should move and try to comfort his other half or not.

,,Until now.. I always accepted how things were.... but seconds ago.. even now.. I'm scared.. I'm scared that if we keep going like this.. That we will one day cross a line so far that we won't.... That we won't be able to turn back.."

It wasn't until then that Lan Wangji moved. Getting up, he walked around the bed and knelt down beside it before hesitantly placing one of his hands on the bed. It took a moment or two until Wei Wuxian slowly placed his less hurting hand on his husbands. The older one however didn't really know what to say.


	74. WangXian | 3

,,I'm sorry.."

The taller males voice was somewhat low, full of guilt and worry because of so many things. There had been a bit of silence between them, yet Wei Wuxian shook his head before speaking in a gradually a bit calmer, more stable tone.

,,It's not your fault alone, Lan Zhan.. We have rarely to never truly talked about anything.. Sleeping with you.. It always felt good.. It always felt good to know that you were letting go of your entire restraint thing but... If I think back, I never thought sex would be like this.."

Neither of the two had spend much time thinking about the fact that Wei Ying was in fact a man that had been quite straight in his former life. Nor did they really think about the other fact that was that Wei Ying was also a man that wasn't born to be a bottom only. Wei Wuxian himself never even thought about the fact that he only had imaginations of being the guy in a relationship before his death.

The things had developed the way they had developed between them. It was this way from the first moment on as the younger one was reborn, until now.

,,What.. What do you think we should do, Wei Ying?"

It was rare that Lan Wangji had a hard time getting a proper sentence out. Sure, he usually never used many words, but those he used came at once and made up for it. Right now however, he was too scared to think properly. At the end, even the smaller male spoke after hesitating.

,,We need to start communicating more.. I also need to try and come up with something because even outside of bed this body of mine isn't good for anything. It's too fragile.. And then... Control."

The older male blinked, noticing the confusion he had caused the other explained.

,,We need to work on a bit more self-control during.. If we go on like this.."

,,I understand.. For now.. I do not think it would be a good idea to continue.. Let me see your hand, I will treat your wounds."

They spend the next half an hour in silence as Lan Wangji tended to the wounds on his lover that he had mostly created himself. As the younger one had guessed, the bone around his wrist area had gotten a little crack, the bone wasn't entirely broken but it was an immense shock for both of them nonetheless. It only went worse as the bandage was wrapped around the wrist, the bruises were treated.. Because as Wei Wuxian tried to get up, as his husband was turned away, he half fell - half sank to the ground; unable to keep himself up on his legs.

Wei Wuxian cursed, yet of course his other half came to help within the blink of an eye. Lifting him up, Lan Wangji held the smaller male bridal style.. It was only when he looked at the bed that he realised there were faint sprinkles of blood - As the other had felt, the pain from his private region must've been from some form of a cut, or rip of his muscles.

Lan Zhan's hold around his husband tightened, it took a moment before he could move to place the other back down on the bed - overly gently. From there on a while passed were all few moments the older one of the married couple would apologise. Again and again, his tone sounding more and more miserable as he treated the last wound as well. It didn't matter that Wei Ying said it was fine. That he was getting told to stop apologising already.. It wasn't fine.

While their brothers in a room not even that far away came to know how great letting go with another person could feel - the married ones came to realise that letting go without knowing how to, could be the worst thing ever.

,,Lan Zhan.. Tell me, what got you so upset..?"

Wei Wuxian spoke up after spending a good amount of time to get his other half to lay down beside him and stop apologising. His tone was more calm. He still wasn't feeling too great, but having decided to change things from now on made him look forward to better days.

,,The flute.."

The taller one of them was holding his husband close, like he was a raw egg. Even though he was glad that it wasn't the end between them, he couldn't yet properly talk again.

Blinking repeatedly in confusion, the former Yiling Patriarch asked something more specific.

,,Were you that upset, because I played around Wen Ning..?"

Lan Wangji shook his head, the other could faintly feel it.

,,Jiang Cheng."

The younger one tensed, he was even more confused than before.

,,I only played so the situation wouldn't escalate further though."

,,You played for him."

,,And?"

,,After all he has done, you played for him."

Wei Wuxian's eyes widened, he finally understood and chuckled for a brief moment before sighing.

,,What he has done, what I have done - It's all in the past. I don't want to spend my life holding onto all the bad.. Especially since Jiang Cheng and I have both paid enough. We might not ever grow close again, but I cannot say that I will ever be able to.. act like nothing ever happened, like the bond didn't exist. We've both done wrong.. Yet we're not children any longer. We need to move on, without clashing if we cross paths."

The older one of them didn't speak up again. He took in the words his lover said, and realised in silence that it wasn't his place to interfere. If anything shall happen, he would protect Wei Wuxian at all cost, yet.. What kind of a husband would he be if he'd keep his beloved from restoring the most basic of bonds with the only family he had left?

At the end, Lan Zhan fell asleep before Wei Ying. Way before the other two had fallen asleep. His dreams weren't great,.. Mostly of losing the bond he had never seen as such with the younger one who had turned into the Yiling Patriarch.

Wei Ying in turn was laying awake in his husbands arms for a lot longer. He was running things through his head. He couldn't keep this body, it was.. good-for-nothing. However, before he reached the key-point that was missing in his idea, he had dozed off and fallen asleep. Like the older male, he dreamed of the past - just that his dreams were a lot less negative.


	75. Chapter 75

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapters, also those I'm still going to write, are going to switch back and forth between being XiCheng related and general character interactions.
> 
> I'm currently unsure how I should categorise the chapters due to that, so if you have an idea I'd be glad to hear it.

Jiang Cheng began to stir.. It took a while before he opened his eyes a tad, only to groan because of the daylight hurting in them. It wasn't like he was no morning person at all, but somehow.. Something was off that morning, he was wide awake, yet at the same time not really.

More time passed before he rolled over on his back, again letting out a growl as he did before putting his arm over his eyes, because he wasn't ready to face the new day yet in all it's dazzling brightness.

It took even more time then before his mind began to work again. He had to recall.. How did he end up in his room? What happened before he got there? And why was he feeling so light, but at the same time exhausted on the inside?

The memories came back one after another. The Jades had been drunk, Jin Ling had thrown a fit and ran off.. Wen Ning went after the kids, Wei Wuxian took care of his husband,.. And he had been assigned to watch over the older Lan brother.

Judging from the pounding of his head, adding together with the next lot of memories - He must've drank far more than he had done in many years and he felt each sip. However...

Everything he remembered after the moment where he had told Lan Xichen to get into the tub... The other wearing his robe, no ribbon covering his forehead, the conversation that almost resulted in a fight,.. Those parts were a little off, yet nothing in comparison to how things went on.

The touching of his chest and back, that he had gotten hard from nothing but that, the kiss, getting picked up from the taller male.. All the memories from inside the bedroom flooded his mind one by one - And with each new one, he began to laugh more and more.

|What the fuck did I dream about?!|

Jiang Cheng was categorising it as some naughty dream, which.. Only made sense to him because the memories were so absurd, they couldn't possibly be true. He must've really drank to the point of insanity and delusion, to end up fantasizing about such matters. Or maybe it had been caused from drinking too much and the build up of need from weeks.

It wasn't until he hid his face behind his hands that his eyes flung open. He felt a pain from his cheek, his fingers beginning to trail over the aching spot,.. There was clearly a wound on his cheek that matched the part of his "dirty dream" that popped up in his mind at the same time.

He had slapped himself, Zidian had caused the scratch.. Zidian.. Where was Zidian? Staring at his hand, Jiang Cheng still tried to talk himself into believing that maybe he was recalling some mix of reality and a weird sex dream.. but he panicked. Trapped in that state he half jumped from the bed and stared at the nightstand like furniture beside it.

Zidian was laying on it, in the middle - save from rolling off.

| Calm down.. It's n-|

The thought that it was still nothing but coincidences or so.. got cut off quick as the Jiang Sect leader turned while thinking. As hard as he would try to fool himself, the state the bed was in couldn't be written off as a coincidence anymore.

He could feel his legs go weak and his heart began to thump in such a crazy beat. Sitting down on the bed, Jiang Cheng spend a good few minutes letting everything sink in. He was completely gone out, staring at the side the older male had more than likely slept on.

The robe that had looked so breathtakingly stunning on Lan Xichen was laying, neatly folded, on the lower end of the bed. Jiang Cheng reached out, took it into his somewhat shaky hands and again simply stared at the robe on his lap for a while longer.

Probably 30 minutes passed before his head flung up. If all of that hadn't been a mix of dream and reality.. - Where was Lan Xichen?

Getting up from the bed, Jiang Cheng wrapped the robe that was smelling after the other around himself. Then he walked around the apartment like room.. Yet the more he walked, the stranger he began to feel.

Lan Xichen was nowhere to be found. It didn't seem like he had planned to return either.

Jiang Cheng could feel the veins on his forehead began to pop, his heart was racing as he stood in the living room staring at the door that led outside. The more he remembered, the more the absence of the other made him boil inside.. He was always growing irrational when angered, and this time was really not an exception.

,,Son of a-"

Just as he was about to end the rather unforgivable curse, he turned and his gaze got fixed on something on the table. Raising a brow Jiang Cheng closed the distance between himself and the table: Liebing was still laying there, just like the Jades forehead ribbon and hair piece.

The Jiang Sect leader hesitated.. His face twisting from rage to all sorts of other emotions before he clenched his fists and let out the heaviest of breaths to calm himself.

At the end he decided to give the other some time. Lan Xichen's belongings were still there so.. He probably would at least try to get Liebing back. The younger one then went about taking a bath, just a normal morning routine - .. Not like it was past 11am at that point, but oh well.

Once he was done with getting ready for the day.. And back to being half paralysed by shock, Jiang Cheng pulled the sheets off of the bed and threw them in a bin. It was a tad less likely that anyone would go through his trash and dare ask questions.

Jiang Cheng spend so much time waiting, that a servant of Nie Huaisang ended up knocking on his door to remind him about the meal time..

At this point the Sect Leader grew furious again. Within a second he got up, grabbed Liebing and slammed the door open - Giving the poor Nie Sect servant a heart attack with it. Jiang Cheng didn't even wait, he stormed off to the dining hall and only grew more pissed as everyone was there; everyone but Lan Xichen.


	76. Chapter 76

,,Where's this guy?!"

It was one of the first times since being reborn that Wei Wuxian had his former sworn brother direct some words at him. He had even gone out of his way to walk all the way across the room to do so, irgnoring his own place entirely. Looking up, Wei Wuxian almost flinched because of how mad Jiang Cheng looked. If someone would put the tiniest of holes into the Sect Leaders veins on his forehead, the rush his blood was in from all the rage would probably make him bleed out in seconds.

Lan Wangji was meanwhile sitting there in complete silence, acting as if the intusion hadn't even happened as he picked out a few vegetables his husband didn't like in his meal.

,,Who..?"

Wei Wuxian asked in a bit of a confused tone.. He felt bad for whoever was the cause of Jiang Cheng's current state and only managed to speak up once the initial shock had subsided.

,,Are you dumb?"

The one dressed in purple somehow managed to get even more pissed.. while Wei Wuxian still didn't really get it.

,,If you're searching for Jin Ling, he's outside already with Wen Ning and the others. They've eaten earlier 'cause he's scared of meeting you, I guess."

,,For fucks sake, I mean.."

Jiang Cheng hesitated, his gaze flickering back and forth as he held Liebing in a tight grip - He had almost used a name that was way too intimate to use just out of the blue.

,,I mean Lan Xichen."

The former Patriarch's expression turned into a "Ah!", if a light bulb could've appeared above his head from finally getting the point, it would've appeared. However, understanding was shortly followed from confusion as he spoke in a tone to match.

,,Zewu-Jun..? He has eaten in his room, as far as I know.. I haven't seen him, yet Lan Zhan meant he didn't feel too well. It's probably 'cause he's embarrassed from getting drunk, or a hangover.."

Hearing that, Jiang Cheng let out a bitter, disgusted sounding chuckle as his brow raised.

|He's embarrassed, huh? Sure thing.|

Was all he thought before saying in a faked a tad more calm tone.

,,Where's his room. He forgot Liebing yesterday and if he's not feeling well it would be tragic to let him try get it on his own."

,,Mmmh.."

Wei Ying really didn't know where the room was, he could only glance at his other half, who didn't seem to be interested in telling the gone mad Jiang Cheng. After a moment the - due to his death - youngest of the three turned to a servant maiden and asked sweetly.

,,Lady, where is Zewu-Jun's room?"

The maiden thought for a moment and then pointed to another maiden before going on to explain that she was supposed to get the plates and so forth out of Lan Xichen's room soon.

Jiang Cheng naturally glared at the girl that was maybe 20, well formed and to his momentary disgust: A natural beauty. If she was assigned to his one night stands room, it truly wasn't much of a surprise that he enjoyed her service.

,,There you go, you can just follow her then."

Wei Ying said that, acting neither too nonchalant nor stiff around the other.

The Jiang Sect leader in turn glared his way once through the dining hall before turning away, ready to leave.. Yet he felt someone tug on his sleeve because of which he turned back around.

,,Hey, have you eaten at all since leaving Yunmeng? She won't go for a while longer, so at least sit down and have something."

Jiang Cheng's eyes had widened minimally as he had turned and heard those words out of his former brothers mouth. As mad as he was, it hit differently because of how familar and similar it was to how they were in the past - yet at the same time almost nothing about it was the same any longer.

,,Isn't really your problem."

,,I know.. It was just.. What happened to your cheek? It'll make you look even more scary if you don't get the wound treated soon."

"It was just.." The smaller male didn't need to finish his sentence for them both to know what he was about to say. It was just natural, a habit,.. One they couldn't use any longer without it feeling wrong.. While at the same time, it felt wrong that it had to feel wrong.

,,Doesn't matter. You're looking like a piece of shit right now yourself."

Lan Wangji tensed, it neither went unnoticed from Jiang Cheng nor his husband. Only Wei Wuxian however could understand the true meaning behind it. Jiang Cheng was worried, in his own way. In a way that was the only one they could use for as long as they didn't sit down and talk about everything properly once. The youngest of the three chuckled softly.

,,I guess, I do. Come on, stop wasting your time on me and go eat."

Wasting his time.. Jiang Cheng's anger mixed with desperation, guilt and sadness. If he would just.. If he would just open up already. If he would just say how things had actually been, they wouldn't need to torture themselves with acting like whatever remained of their bonds from the past was bad.

However, Jiang Cheng couldn't do it. They both knew that they weren't ready yet. All he could do was show the tiniest bit of reconciling with walking over to his table.. Where no one was waiting for him, not a single soul. The food didn't taste well, yet it wasn't the foods fault, or the cooks..

How was the food supposed to taste good with so many memories currently lingering? With so many negative emotions making a knot in ones throat?

Jiang Cheng's mind got flooded with memories of how it felt to eat with his family, their laughter, even fights.. How it felt to not eat alone. To fall asleep knowing they were waiting for him with breakfast again the next morning.

And now.. It wasn't only that. He had new, overly painful memories and their intertwined emotions lingering while it was gone already - Like everything in his life was gone. Honestly, he had just lost his first time.. Or many of them, yet instead of feeling happy and free - he hated it. Before it hadn't been an issue to turn a blind eye to those matters.. To act like it didn't exist.. But now, he had embraced someone, gotten embraced, comforted, there had been someone to talk to,.. Someone who he fell asleep wrapped around of.


	77. Chapter 77

Wei Wuxian wasn't feeling much better as he every so often glanced at the current Jiang Sect leader. It was heartwrenching to see him so alone, isolated. Even the young maiden that had gotten to know she was supposed to walk Jiang Cheng to the room was overly cautious and careful with whatever she made around him.

At the end, Jiang Cheng hadn't eaten much. As the maiden approached, he couldn't even hide his displeasure from her mere presence. They then disappeared in complete silence.

They arrived at the room of the Jade within some minutes. As the other had said, their rooms were almost on the entire opposite of the building. Jiang Cheng remained silent as the maiden knocked, they both entered and even as she had already left after collecting the dinner tray. The only thing he did was glare at the maiden because - in his state of rage - the smile Lan Xichen directed at her appeared to be the same that had gotten directed at him.

Lan Xichen was sitting there, everything about him had gone back to his perfect every day facade. The three things that disgusted Jiang Cheng just as much as the maiden were: The plain night robe the other was wearing, how calm he appeared and this allday everyday smile of his.

The older one sensed something, yet he couldn't guess the extent that the outcome of his actions had reached. Pouring a cup of tea for both of them, he spoke up in his normal tone as he looked up - Only to see the other stare at him in pure displeasure.

,,What leads you here, young master Jiang?"

Jiang Cheng clenched his teeth, his face was turning bright red and Zidian who was back on his finger was emitting purple sparks due to how mad his owner was.

While it was a terrible question, Lan Xichen at the time didn't even know how much the other remembered. Or if he remembered it all, how he felt about it now - sober.

Before saying a word, Jiang Cheng changed his posture. Standing as upright as he could, with his head tilted to the side and backwards a little. His entire aura was just getting darker and his expression pretty much that of someone who's gone mad - Yet his voice sounded so overly calm and weirdly gentle; while in truth he was being a sarcastic bitch.

,,Oh.. I don't know, Huan. What should lead me here.. Maybe that you forgot your belongings in my room? It wouldn't be fair on your treasured items to just get left behind after all of the moments you shared with them, wouldn't it? I mean, at least not unless they just didn't mean anything to you."

Lan Xichen's eyes widened a little as he heard his name. Or more precicely: This version of his name. Looking down at his cup while listening to the others words that weren't leaving the truth hidden at all,.. He let out a barely audible chuckle, his lips forming into a small and somewhat sad smile. At the end, his decision had been wrong once again, hadn't it? The extent at which he "fucked up" would only hit him deeper as the younger one of course misunderstood his reaction.

Jiang Cheng was too pissed to take reality in. It probably didn't matter at that moment in time what the other would've done, it would've only made him more pissed. His voice got a tad louder, the rage taking over the faked calmness from before, yet the sarcasm that was as sharp as a blade remained.

,,Trying to avoid me that bad that you rather leave Liebing behind? You didn't even fucking send someone to get it for you. Wow, just wow, Huan."

The older Jade didn't reply, as much as he tried to come up with something in his mind.. He knew perfectly fine that at this rate nothing would get the other to calm down. It was just another one of those things he was terrible at, properly treating something he wanted, or cherished.

,,Ah, sorry. Did I interrupt something there? I can't blame you for rather staying in your room than meet me. The maiden assigned to you is truly a pretty one."

At this point Lan Xichen looked up, there was shock, hurt and confusion visible on his face. He could faintly see a glimmer of the others sadistic side in his eyes, the corner of his lips twitching into even more of a terrifying like smirk. After a moment he spoke, his voice barely audible and weak.

,,What..?"

,,What?"

Jiang Cheng chuckled darkly, running his free hand over his face just to feel the scratch on his cheek once again. He let it hover there for a second, staring at the Lan Sect leader as he did, an act of pure provocation.. Then out of nowhere he closed the gap and slammed Liebing on the table in front of Lan Xichen.. Letting out his rage fully this time, it would be a miracle if no one would hear his words.

,,That's what I'm fucking supposed to ask you, Lan Xichen! Already going along trying to hit on the next person, this time in your room? Respect. All those damn fake words, those entire fake actions."

While the older male could feel his heart sink, due to the fact that worse than Jiang Cheng's words was his tone. Hatred, disgust, his voice was full of nothing positive - not the slightest hint of care or gentleness left. What worsened it was that as Lan Xichen couldn't reply because of how deep it hit, causing the younger one chuckled again.. It was visible that he had barely managed to hold back the urge to spit into the Jade's face.

,,So that's your thing, huh? Your little game. Playing virgins, running off once they're asleep and acting as if nothing ever happened. How many did you fuck that way, Huan? Man, for a moment I actually believed the shit you said and thought you were the same. You Lan's are truly a disgusting bunch. One fucks his husband 'til he has broken bones, the other is into dirty one night stands and breaking his victims. What an actor you are, both of you.. Yet I have to give it to your brother, he at least married the good for nothing he somehow brainwashed into accepting whatever gets done to him."

Jiang Cheng had stood back upright at the start of his speech, arms crossed in front of his chest, gaze averted - While to the Jade it seemed as if he wasn't even worth getting looked at anymore, in truth the younger one was hurt. So deeply, he hated himself for it. He felt used, toyed with, turned into a fool and he had willingly let the other do so - Even allowed him with his own voice repeatedly.


	78. Chapter 78

Jiang Cheng didn't realise who the dense one really was. Nor who was really breaking whom.. Until he turned his head and the sight he got made his entire world stop turning.

Lan Xichen was sitting there, cross legged on the ground. The smile that was usually always framing his face, no matter what was going on around him, was gone. His darker colored eyes opened wide, overflowing with tears and the pain, shock and betrayel so visible in them. The hand that had formerly held onto the cup had let go, resting on its side; it was shaking badly.

Within seconds as their eyes met, the salty pearls began to roll down the older males skin that looked even more pale than usually. Neither of the men could look away, they both felt as if the ground was getting pulled away from underneath their feet; each in their own way. At the end, the Jade opened his mouth, his lips were trembling as he clenched his hand into a fist, so tightly it hurt.

,,Is that what you think..? Is that.. Is that all you have to say..?"

Lan Xichen's voice was broken, weak and barely above a whisper.

The younger one couldn't get a single word out. His throat was dry, a knot had formed in it that made it almost unbearable to even breath. Even his chest area felt tight and painful.

,,I... I have never.. shared a bed with anyone this way... I never even thought about it.. I even told you.. Why would I.. Why would I put in so much time, if I.. if I get relief all the time.. with just whomever..? I didn't.. I didn't leave.. or make distance.. because I'm easy to get.. I didn't know how you would react.. I didn't know if you would even remember.... If I wouldn't have left.. What if someone found out.. Is that really what you were thinking of me, A-Cheng..?"

Jiang Cheng could say even less at this point. He hated himself to the core for being so overly dumb. It was just yet again another one of those moments where things had been so obvious; yet he managed not to see.

As he got nothing but silence as a reply yet again.. A half smile formed on the taller males lips as he looked down at the cup he took back into his hand. When he spoke up again, his voice was suddenly so calm and relaxed, yet what he said and the realisation he had had were both heartwrenching.

,,I guess, I can't blame you.. How can someone think good of me,.. when I don't even do so myself.."

The younger one of them took a step forward automatically as he heard that, opening his mouth to finally say something himself - Yet his heart only sank further as Lan Xichen lifted his free hand and said calmly at first.

,,Leave."

Jiang Cheng hesitated, more or less wavering before he tried again. Taking another step he spoke at the same time in a quite desperate, a tad soothing voice.

,,That's-"

,,Leave!"

The Jiang Sect leader could feel his heart stop beating and the strength vanish from his body. It was the first time that the Jade had actually raised his voice at him, his tone between rage and making it clear it was an order - And that it probably wouldn't end well if the other would stay. The darker gaze of Lan Xichen was showing the same, yet his expression over all was so.. horrifyingly calm, almost content.

He now finally understood. Lan Xichen had gotten exactly what he had wanted: Things had ended badly. The only thing he could accept. He couldn't accept closeness, had anticipated nothing but a tragedy; and now he had gotten it. As much as it hurt, it was pain that he had waited for and the only thing could cope with in the long run.

Jiang Cheng shook his head, speaking in a tone that was again a bit full of disgust as he turned and walked to the door.

,,What I think never mattered to you. You're so lost in your damn world of seeing yourself as the victim, you even started to bath in it. It's all you can accept, like a comfort zone. You got what you wanted, yet other than you I won't go back on my words, Huan. Be proud of yourself. It didn't have to turn out this way. You were the one who made it happen, so you could keep having control over when pain and tragedy hit you, where none necessarily needed to be."

Lan Xichen chuckled, he could be a bitter asshole if rubbed the wrong way. The other had stood at the door as he finished what to say, staring at the door knob before he walked out and slammed the door shut.

Jiang Cheng didn't leave immediately though. Leaning against the door with his back, banging his head lightly yet repeatedly against it.. Moments later the sound of glass breaking could be heard right behind him; around the height of his back.

The taller one of them had thrown the cup he had held in his hand. He usually wasn't the type for such reactions, but honestly.. he didn't know where to go with this mess of emotions differently.

They both didn't get to know that they were regretting mostly the same things. They also didn't get to know that they were reacting in almost the exact same way. While the Jade ripped the ribbon off of his forehead and curled himself up against the wall while tugging on his hair - Jiang Cheng gritted his teeth, his eyes pressed shut, hand reaching up to tug on his own hair.

How much longer would they both need before they would manage to break free from the hell they were living in due to the hand they had gotten from life? Due to the way they had gotten raised? Would they ever even manage? Or was it too late for them, after all - And there was nothing more left than to accept?


	79. Chapter 79

Jiang Cheng kept leaning against the door for minutes.. He could hear that the other wasn't in a good condition - but being the cause, having gotten thrown out already and that adding together with him not knowing how to comfort someone anyway.. Pushing himself off of the door, he hesitated for a moment or two longer before walking off.

Like his nephew the day prior, he just kept walking. It was too early to drink, his state too all over the place to sleep, yet the urge that he needed to get out was there. Accompanied by the one to rip something apart.

At the end he walked out to where most were back at working on their "snow scultpures".. To his half surprise, half shock Jin Ling was sitting with the Lan Juniors, his former brother, the 2. Jade he didn't favour and Wen Ning.

Call if a gut feeling if you like, but the youngest of the boys tensed and as he noticed all eyes getting glued to a spot behind him while no one said a word.. It was quite possible they'd all hear him swallow.

,,Do something already.."

It wasn't the best phrase to use, but Jin Ling couldn't deny that Jingyi had a point. If he wouldn't grow some balls, he'd be unable to face himself, and even more so his parents one day.

Everyone glanced at the boy in his golden robe as he got up - No one needed to be him to know he was feeling weak on his legs. Wei Wuxian especially was somewhat wary and focused on the situation, due to what happened the other day; but more so because of how Jiang Cheng looked.

| I'm dead.. |

Was all Jin Ling could think as he held his head low.. A faint glance upwards was enough to see the vein on his uncles forehead pop and his brow twitch. Yet like the real baby version of a sect leader, the one dressed in gold walked all the way up to the senior - leaving maybe 3 foot of a distance between them. After that though, nothing happened. The longer it took to - actually for the first time in his life - get a beating from Jiang Cheng, the more terrible he felt and the less he knew what to do or say.

,,Jin Ling. What did I tell you about the two phrases you shouldn't forget?"

Wei Wuxian spoke up, in more of a teacher than parental tone. It took a moment, due to all the fear, before Jin Ling's eyes widened - even though they remained fixed on the ground - his maternal uncles gaze in turn briefly averted to Wei Wuxian.

Jiang Cheng raised a brow, that was honestly getting mildly interesting. Crossing his arms in front of his chest, he went back into his usual position. The brow of his that had formerly twitched, now faintly raised in anticipation - What could there really be that his former brother could've taught the boy, that was useful in this moment in time?

,,.. Thank you.. and.."

As Jin Ling looked up, finally ready to use the missing of the two phrases.. He could feel his heart sink, then he felt like he was about to die as his uncle spoke up; directing his words at Wei Wuxian in such a scolding and arrogant tone.

,,If you go along teaching him something, teach him everything about those matters. Even though he should apologise right now for what he has said, is it true? Do you actually think that?"

If that statement would've come from anyone else, no one would've been surprised - Wei Wuxian himself would've more than likely just smirked and rolled his eyes. Right now though, everyone - even Lan Wangji - was shocked and most also wide eyed.

,,Honestly.. It doesn't matter who apologises first. It is always the better choice to make the first step. Be honest and open."

Even though the two former prides of Yunmeng couldn't know, everyone understood deeply what the conversation truly was about. No one though, had expected such a growth from either of them, even less from Jiang Cheng.

For once the eye contact between the former brothers lingered a few seconds longer, then Jiang Cheng turned his attention and gaze back to his nephew that couldn't help but flinch.

,,I am the one that has to say sorry. Looking back, your words were the outcome of the way I have treated you the past years. I reap what I sow. Late, but.. I'm sorry."

Jiang Cheng's tone was still quite close to his usual one, yet there was honesty and care lingering noticeably enough for all those that weren't used to him speaking like that. Jin Ling didn't even know how to react.. even less as, with a load of hesitation and awkwardness, the one dressed in purple closed the gap between them and put a hand on the younger ones shoulder.

Jin Ling could only stare at his uncle wide eyed - like most around them as well -.. They would both need some more time to figure out how to properly uncle and nephew though, because neither knew what to do next.. To the point where Jiang Cheng awkwardly patted the boys shoulder before letting go and walking off while saying in his usual tone.

,,Don't think I'll play around with you here though."

They were all somewhat relieved as some normality came back in, after the shock of the last minutes....

At the end however.. As they all went back to their sculptures, with Jiang Cheng standing there while giving it all a critical look for some time. He sooner or later couldn't bear watching this nightmare in silence and started to give instructions that went more and more desperate.

How could people be so.. dumb..?

Everyone enjoyed the situation in their own way though. Most were glad for Jin Ling. Jin Ling in turn was strangely touched and happy. The juniors were happy for their friend and a bit of a mess because Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng began to throw tips and half orders around that were completely contradicting the others. At some point they even began to laugh.

,,Where is Zewu-Jun..?"

Sizhui asked sooner or later, staring at the mess of a snowman that no one was working on. Jiang Cheng hesitated before speaking in a tone that had the faintest hint of being troubled in it.

,,He's not feeling too well. I don't think he'll join you guys today."

They were all between confused and assuming that it must be some hangover.

It wasn't a lie. Lan Xichen wasn't feeling too great. It took quite some time before his breakdown was over, afterwards he went back in the bathroom and spend a good while in the warm tub. When did he last feel so cold due to being alone..? He couldn't recall. It wasn't until he took a look out of his window, where he could barely see the others all together having fun.. that he forced himself together and began to work on something while sitting on his bed. If his uncle would know that he was writing like that, undressed and without his ribbon on.. Name it a rebellious phase, Lan Xichen didn't overly care.


	80. Chapter 80

Lan Xichen needed some time to fully concentrate on his task. As much as he wanted to distract himself, his mind was so all over the place. He felt groggy, yet restless at the same time.

However, after staring at his blank piece of paper for who knew how long he finally began to write down a lot of points. Many of them he scratched the more he wrote, adding new ones on the way - or altered ones at times.

If Jiang Cheng wouldn't go back on his word, he at least shouldn't go back on all of his - right?

After writing for who knew how long, he stopped to get himself a cup of tea. Just as he put his paper, ink and feather aside though.. Loud, deep and heartfelt laughter could be heard - Lan Xichen recognised the sound, it was one of his specialities after all.. yet he couldn't quite believe it.

Before he had gotten to the window however, his guess got confirmed as Jiang Cheng's voice was re-echoing through the entirety of the Nie Sects garden.

,,What the hell is that?! Did you spend so much time within Gusu now that you forgot how to work with snow?! The heck's that even supposed to be??"

The older Jade leaned with his shoulder against the window, not noticing the sad, yet happy and a little lovesick like smile that formed on his face.. Even less that the look in his eyes wasn't that different.

Jiang Cheng was sitting there, for once not alone. Clearly making fun of Wei Wuxian whose attempt at making a bunny sculpture had just collapsed.

,,That's not fair! I couldn't even make it stable before turning away to help Jingyi!"

Wei Wuxian's voice wasn't any less audible, neither of the former pride's of Yunmeng really noticed how close this short lived moment was to how they had been once.

Lan Xichen watched for a few minutes more, sadly he couldn't see Jiang Cheng build anything.

Letting out a sigh, with a bit of an ache from his heart he then turned and walked away to make some tea. Every so often he could hear mostly the juniors laugh and yell - or yell, then laugh.. It just further strengthened his mindset that things needed to change within his sect.

As stunning as his Cloud Recesses were, it was nothing against a more lively place. In truth.. the Cloud Recesses reminded him of himself: So pretty at first glance, so empty in reality. On second thought, weren't all of those from his Sect like that? Handsome, yet torn beings..?

(Hours Later)

Lan Xichen hadn't left his room again that day. He was engrossed in his work, his former blockade fading away - making him write and write until the maiden came again with the final meal of the day. He had barely managed to put his forehead ribbon on in time.

Taking the maiden in more closely this time.. He couldn't entirely blame Jiang Cheng for his mind trailing off. She was a beauty without any make up on. Apart from that she was polite, without being overbearing. There were hardly any imperfections, even her over all figure was a true natures gift.

For whatever reason though, even looking at her from the front and the back - secretly of course - it didn't really do anything with him. As hard as he tried, the older Jade couldn't even figure out why as he ate his meal slowly.

As he was eating, silence began to take over the Nie Sect. Everyone was in the dining hall, having their meals themselves. Here and there someone asked if they should look after him, yet.. Lan Xichen hadn't even officially completely finished his seclusion time yet, it was only an exception that he was outside, so they figured it was something to do with that.

Jiang Cheng was sitting close enough to throw in some comments, yet still at 2 tables distance to the others. He however felt more restless each time that his.. one time lover got mentioned than the lively bunch that was completely clueless.

(More hours later)

Lan Xichen couldn't sleep. As hard as he tried, he was at the end doing nothing but throwing himself from one side of the bed to the other; unable to find sleep and a comfortable position.

It also felt weirdly cold in his room, even though he was, just like his brother, used to way colder degrees. Letting out a groan, he got back up, grabbed his finished paperwork and went through it again.

Apart from a letter, or request he had written for a lot of Sects, he had also worked on some new rules. Or well, not entirely new - Most were either altered already existing ones, or some that he wanted to temporarily put on hold to see how things would change. 1 new rule was there though.

Going through the list again, making sure everything was worded properly the Lan Sect leader mumbled to himself.

1) The rule about respect remains. However, in cases of extreme rudeness or even violent like acts towards yourself or someone else, you will now be allowed to react in a more matching manner. This does not mean you are allowed to use unnecessary acts of violence, or words of rudeness. Your reaction must still be an appropriate one to the chain of events that led up to it.

2) Within class, silence is key and attention has to be paid. Respect, like silence, is the key. Outside of class, after-studies and assigned works have to be completed properly. Afterwards however, until sundown, the rule of silence will be - at first for a trial period - in abeyance. This is to see whether or not, or to which extent, it'll positively effect the youths of our Sect, their studies, work effectivity and our sect in general.

3) The prohibition of alcohol within the Cloud Recesses will also be temporarily put on hold. For all those that are old enough to drink only. However, all those that haven't yet officially taken in alcohol will have to go through a supervised trial. While this may seem like a reckless choice, it is to prevent accidents like the following examples: Sect meetings degenerate because alcohol was handed out at Sect member with no prior alcohol experience, general accidents since someone who hasn't drank yet can possibly be tricked into drinking without their knowledge etc. This does not mean excessive drinking will be allowed, nor that minors or those that hand alcohol to minors won't be punished if they get caught.

4) After sundown you will be allowed to stay awake until 22.30pm. It may be better if you use the last half an hour to get ready to rest. You are allowed to move freely within your home, yet please respect others when you make certain choices, such as how loud you are. The morning calls will begin at 6.30, yet you will be allowed to stay within your room until 7.30am. Studies in the morning will be starting from now on at 9am.

5) Punishments will be, depending on the cause, reduced back to copying the sect rules normally. Apart from that you will have to write an essay about where you have gone wrong, why you shouldn't do it again and so forth.

6) Pets will now be allowed within the Cloud Recesses, yet you're in charge of taking care of the pet that relies on you properly. This mostly applies in case you find a hurt animal, or a stray one since those are in need of help more than those that get sold from breeders. Your pet has to stay with you and within your 4 walls, the latter especially at night. In case a litter happens, depending on what kind of pet you have, we will make sure they get the right owners that will take good care of them.

7) Instead of acting like certain parts of cultivation don't exist, we will from now on use specialists to teach about those matters - since what is forbidden is more tempting, as long as it's forbidden and because it is more dangerous not to educate the youth. You will be purely educated, use remains forbidden.

8) You are allowed to continue living by the old rules, if you want to. However, you have to respect those that choose to live under the new rules, just like they have to respect your choice.


	81. Chapter 81

The older Jade nodded to himself, only to let out a whining noise then before hiding his face behind his hands. It sounded all good and fine in theory, but in reality as fully as he believed in his decision - He'd more than likely get to hear quite a few things from his elders and especially uncle for it. Especially the part about the "different kinds of cultivation" and the "specialists".. which was demonic cultivation and Wei Wuxian.

However, as he went dead silent while staring at the paper he could hear something. Faint at first, yet with a bit of concentration it was clear that someone was walking around outside, working on something. At this point he couldn't tell though who the person was he could hear breathing semi-heavily at times.

Getting up from the bed the tall male wrapped his night robe tighter around himself, then walked into the living room area where he grabbed his quite huge winter gown. It looked stunning on him, even though he had only worn it on his journey to the Nie Sect, in general only once due to his time in seclusion. It had been a gift of Wei Wuxian and his brother.

The cloak was light blue in color, with white details similiar to snowflakes on it. The edges around the chest were framed by thick white fur that spread upwards to the hood. It was rare to find a mans cloak with a hood, and the hood on this piece was huge. The white fur around it so fluffy, even thicker than around the chest. The wrists also had the same type of details on them. Only the band with which the cloak would be tied together with was golden in color.

Once he had put his cloak on, as well as his shoes Lan Xichen opened the door a tad. It had a strange thrill to it to go out so long after his usual sleeping time. Lurking for a few seconds, as no one came he snuck outside and slowly walked to the gate that would lead to the garden where the noise had come from.

He really didn't expect what he ended up seeing though as he repeated what he had done before, opening the door a tad just enough to silently lurk through like some sort of spy.

Jiang Cheng was standing there in front of the snow sculptures the others had build, he hadn't gone back on his word once - He never had touched one himself, orders were all he had given. His clothes were more plain, as if he didn't want to be recognised at first glance; who even knew he had such secret robes?

The Jade watched in silence how the younger one went about examining each figure closely. Wei Wuxian's rabbit had been mostly rebuild. Lan Wangji's attempt at a snow rabbit honestly didn't look too bad, yet a few more final touches here and there would probably not be a bad idea. The juniors had sticked to standard snowmans, yet it was clear even from a distance that Jingyi and Jin Ling had ended up fighting over who could build the bigger one. Sizhuis was around his height, properly build, by far the most perfect one.

Even though the chance of getting caught was around zero, as the younger Sect Leader looked around Lan Xichen still flinched back from the door - almost blowing his cover with barely managing to stop the door from falling shut. As he dared look back outside, Jiang Cheng was standing in front of his nephews snowman, it wasn't possible to see his expression yet his hand reached up to where the hidden one knew was the wound from the night before.

As the smaller male began to move again, the Jade got ready to leave.. However, Jiang Cheng only took a few more steps before stopping in front of the snowman Lan Xichen had worked on. It was faint, but due to how silent everything was now, in pretty much the middle of the night, the hidden male could hear the other snort - followed from a amused comment that at the same time sounded like he was at a loss.

,,That's really.. terrible.."

The older ones jaw dropped, before the biggest of pouts formed on his lips while his face began to burn. How could Jiang Cheng dare say something like that after he hadn't even been able to work on it for more than.. 1 hour, even less with all the instructions being given.

Lan Xichen was so flustered and upset by his snow arts skills getting teased again that he was ready to fling the door open and let the other hear a few words.. Yet just as he was taking in a deep breath to start rampaging once he'd come out of his hiding spot, Jiang Cheng threw the sad copy of a snowman over before crushing it entirely. The Jade couldn't even move, he was frozen in place due to shock. It wasn't necessary to go that far, was it?

However, just as the older one had collected himself enough to move, the other did as well and he paused.

| What.. |

As Lan Xichen stared in disbelief, Jiang Cheng had knelt down. It wasn't quite visible what he was doing for a few seconds until he began to move. He had made a snowball, a big sized one at that, and was now rolling it over the floor to make it grow even larger and larger in size. At the end, however it was possible, the ball was reaching his hip and he picked it up, letting out a groan as he did, before taking a few steps to the side - putting it down at the exact spot where the Jade's snowman had formerly stood.

The Lan Sect leader was.. so confused. It got to the point where he looked away, blinked repeatedly and looked back, as if to make sure he wasn't imagining things. He wasn't, the sight he got was still the same. After a few moments, he silently closed the door before quickly walking off.

He knew the Nie Sect well, it didn't take long for Lan Xichen to get on top of a small roof where he'd have a better view without - hopefully - getting caught. It was the most reckless and out of character he had acted in a sober state since yelling at Wei Wuxian, or well.. if one wants to count him yelling at the Jiang Sect leader, then it wouldn't be so long since he last did.


	82. Chapter 82

Weirdly enough, somewhere between him getting on top of the roof and trying to spot the snowman building one - The latter had gone missing without a trace. Lan Xichen truly believed he had lost his mind, not that he remembered having hit his head.

He almost blew his cover again as the other reappeared with a bucket full of water, yet he covered his mouth with his hand just in time. Everything from there on just went even more shocking as Jiang Cheng carefully did something to the snowman that the older one couldn't really figure out at the time.

Minutes passed before the one dressed in plain dark blue clothing got up from the ground, walked once around the base of the snowman and then repeated everything all over again. Forming a snowball, rolling it around on the ground until it reached a tad higher than the height of his knees. Letting out a groan again, Jiang Cheng lifted the bunch of snow up and put it on top of the snowmans base. Then he went back to doing the task with the water the Lan Sect leader didn't quite understand.

Walking around the slowly clearer getting figure, the younger one of them rubbed his hands together. He really wasn't used to all of those childish matters anymore, for that he had to give it to himself though - his project was turning out well so far.

Lan Xichen wasn't feeling cold at all. Not even because of his unique, high quality cloak but simply because of the gesture the other didn't know he was witnessing. He could gather perfectly fine what Jiang Cheng was planning.. And it made him feel warm, so warm and fuzzy once all over - yet he did feel somewhat bad for the freezing one.

However, the Jade didn't end up blowing his cover. He watched the Jiang Sect leader bend down again, form the head of the snowman, put it on the middle section and then go about this weird procedure with the water again. The one currently dressed in dark blue was far from satisfied and done though.

Reaching into his sleeve, he pulled out the hair accessory the hidden male had never gotten back and put it on the snowmans head. After that he began to walk around in the closer area, not leaving far enough for Lan Xichen to be able to leave his hiding spot and take a closer look. The next things Jiang Cheng attached were the other details: Nose, where he got the carrot from.. Lan Xichen didn't want to dare ask.. eyes and mouth made from stones - perfectly positioned -, arms made from sticks.

Even as the taller male thought there couldn't be anything more to do, Jiang Cheng surprised him with putting more stones downwards on the snowmans upper body, then he took a few steps back; staring at his work. The younger one didn't even bother rubbing his hands together any longer, it was so deep in the night that he'd just make the burning of his hands worse.

Yet.. moments of debating later, the one dressed in dark blue leaned back down, collecting the bit of remaining snow in the close area - that he had mostly freed from snow with building that huge of a snowman. But again, Lan Xichen ended up being unable to properly see what the Jiang Sect leader had done.

The Jade believed that after those two nights he wouldn't be surprised by anything anymore.. Yet he was wrong, because as Jiang Cheng went about putting his hands in his pants pockets, he tensed. Rummaging further, the younger male began to make a circle around himself as he stared at the ground, then he walked in each direction he had previously disappeared to.. before he came back with a white string in his hand.

Lan Xichen really needed to concentrate to finally take it in that Jiang Cheng was staring at his forehead ribbon that he had also abandoned when leaving the younger ones room in a hurry. It was impossible to describe Jiang Cheng's expression, simply because the Jade wasn't able to see it, yet the smaller males grip tightened around it before he let it disappear again in his pocket.

Long after Jiang Cheng had left, the older one of them was still sitting on the rooftop, simply staring at the snowman while smiling like a fool as his face burned and heart beat fast. As he went back into his room, at some point finally, Lan Xichen took another bath; not that he was feeling cold but better safe than sorry.

The Jiang Sect leader had done the same.. Just that he was in fact damn cold. If he'd catch something, it would be his own fault. He was drenched head to toe, yet honestly.. Jiang Cheng hadn't been able to sleep at all, his mind was a mess and it had itched in his fingers earlier already when everyone was around to do something about this mess of a something that dared getting labelled as a snowman.

Just because of that, for no other reason at all - of course - had he gone out of his room and out of his way to go about building one accidentally on the same spot as the Lan Sect leaders.. while making sure there were no witnesses..

Filling his tub with water, Jiang Cheng ended up soaking in it for as long as the temperature of the water allowed it. Not that it overly helped, but oh well.

At the end, Lan Xichen had curled up on his bed, underneath his blanket, smiling to himself still. He fell asleep while thinking about everything he had seen the past one or two hours, if not some longer, and even though it felt somewhat cold and lonely.. He still couldn't help but sleep soundly.

The younger one in turn wore the robe that the other had worn before. He was actively brainwashing himself into the tactic that he would just go along acting like the second, clean robe didn't exist.. at least until the last day when he would suddenly discover - or re-discover - its existence and take it back to Lotus Pier as well.

He also rolled himself together on the bed that the two had already shared, accidentally on the side the older male had slept on. Accidentally with his forehead ribbon in his hand. Accidentally taking in far too deep breaths to somehow find comfort in the others scent, so he wouldn't drown in both the loneliness and nightmares.


	83. Chapter 83

The night for the other Nie Sect guests was.. quite the soft repeat of the night from before.

While Lan Zhan and Wei Ying skipped the "every day" for this night.. it wouldn't have been possible for them to make love anyway. The younger one of them was totally exhausted, talking and talking and talking before he ended up asleep on top of his lovers lap in the hot tub. Wei Ying falling asleep like that was nothing too unusual, yet it hadn't occured often that he fell asleep so early.

Shaking his head, the taller male gently went about getting out of the tub, drying them both down and laying them down on the bed. Wei Ying didn't even stir once, he just mumbled a few more impossible to understand words - yet as fast asleep as he was it was clear he felt hyper and content enough for it to be audible still.

As little as he wanted to admit, Lan Zhan knew perfectly fine that it was due to all the things that had happened during the day - more so because of what happened with Jiang Cheng and Jin Ling. The older one then ended up falling asleep with this tiny hint of a smile playing on his lips as he stroked through his husbands hair.

The Juniors had meanwhile thrown all of their sheets together in one room. They weren't satisfied yet with their hymn for the youth and planned to work on it. Of course, they ended up pulling Wen Ning in with them. Even though here and there Jin Ling and Jingyi had their little moments, it didn't even get to them at the time how easy it really was to form a closer bond. They were having fun, a good time, a little louder here - a tad more silent there. However, they avoided - purposefully or not - the heavy topics that night. At the end they fell asleep past 12, in Jin Ling's luxurious room, on the ground, on the bunch of sheets and pillows all over the place.

When it was time for the breakfast the next morning, the only ones that showed up were: Lan Xichen, Lan Wangji and Wen Ning. It was the weirdest of combinations, especially since the latter wasn't even able to eat. The only bits of a conversation that happened were the following:

,,Brother.. Where is young master Wei?"

,,He kept asking me for 5 more minutes of sleep for an hour before I came here."

Neither of the 3 really knew why the oldest even asked, they knew the answer already.

,,Are you feeling better?"

Well, that had turned out rather awkward for the one that had gone missing the last day. He took a bite to have a moment to think before replying.

,,I'm feeling a little tired, but yes I am. I have been working on a few things yesterday, but those are matters I wish to discuss later still anyway."

Lan Zhan looked up and blinked, his older brothers smile growing into a reassuring one. They knew one another well enough to notice one another's confusion and so forth no matter what.

,,If we should not be together at the time, just let someone call for me."

And so the conversation died down before - almost too late - the Junior disciples showed up. They looked tired, which they were, yet..

,,Jingyi.. Young Master Jin.."

Lan Xichen's voice was so full of shock and worry as he rose from his seat at the sight of the two he had called out for. The boys only awkwardly glanced at one another while chafing at the bit.

,,Brother.. The situation has been settled between them. We might not understand, but such a matter will not occur again in the future, right?"

Both boys gazes flickered up to the ceiling, it just went worse as Lan Wangji spoke up and the older Jade seemed between reassured, confused and even more worried. At the end, glancing at one another again, all 3 boys and Wen Ning spoke at the same time in a mature tone.

,,No such thing will occur again, we can assure you Hanguang-Jun, Zewu-Jun."

The younger 2 of the juniors still looked a little.. gone through the storm from their brawl the other night. Wei Wuxian had saved them the other day as they first ran into Lan Wangji and him, but right now they had to face a small ugly situation on their own.

Taking a look at one of the boys, then the next and so forth Lan Xichen spoke moments later in his gentle yet more leader like tone as he fixed his posture as well.

,,Did you learn your lesson?"

Jingyi and Jin Ling glanced at one another again before the older boy said the first portion, the younger the second part of the speech.

,,Yes we have. Before, we had many issues with one another, due to a lack of communication. Now however we have learned that we need to communicate, instead of judge and use words lightly. A temperament can be of help, yet one has to find the right balance. We also got to know the pain it can cause, physically and mentally. We know now that violence is not an option and that it can destroy many things."

,,Apart from that, Zewu-Jun.. Neither of us was wrong, nor right. We have acted immature for so long. We didn't understand the true meaning of bonds, nor how important it is to actually form or have them. Now however, even though we might still not understand - We want to change for the better, avoid making such kinds of mistakes again. We might be young but that doesn't mean we can act blind or deaf, or else we won't ever be taken seriously. We all have something we want to achieve in our life's and such thing won't be easy to accomplish by working against, instead of with one another. Our behaviour was unsightly and brought shame about our sects and ancestors, you may punish us if you feel like that's needed. Even I, as the soon to be leader of the Lanling Jin Sect, won't avoid taking responsibility for our actions."

As the boys stood there half bowing to further show how serious they were.. Lan Xichen stared at them, visibly at a loss and unable to understand what had happened just now. It got to the point where the younger Jade had to clear his throat for his brother to snap out of it and speak in a still shaken up kind of, yet at the same time impressed tone.

,,After listening to your speech I doubt such thing will be needed. However, I will talk to Jiang Cheng still so that might change. For now, eat and then write down the views for your futures, because it might be a good time to see how similar they are to what I have worked on yesterday."

The juniors all together flinched, Jiang Cheng hadn't said a word about it the other day but.. Did he really have to have a say when it came to.. punishment of all things?

,,Yes, Zewu-Jun."

After a moment they said the phrase in sync, full of respect before walking off, with Wen Ning on their heels. They would go on to write their essays together in Jin Ling's room.. while the two Jade's went each back into their own rooms.


	84. Chapter 84

When the time for lunch arrived everyone did as well.. or well, Jiang Cheng didn't.

A lot of chattering happened before everyone had their meal in front of them, from there on it was awkward silence - with someone saying something, only to get exhorted from Lan Wangji. However, Lan Xichen allowed them to talk, as long as it were important matters like the essays he had asked the juniors to write. To the Lan brother's surprise, they said they had finished them all before this mealtime.

,,Oh, I'm sorry!"

The group turned their heads as a lot of noise had come from a spot not that far away from them. Followed from a young maiden speaking up in a hurry, and tone full of guilt...

Jiang Cheng's brow twitched, Zidian emitting purple sparks.. Everyone else felt instantly sorry for the servant maiden that seemed to not have paid attention to her surrounding - ending with her colliding with Jiang Cheng.. but it went worse. She had held a full meal tray in her hand, the meal half fell to the ground while the remaining half spattered all over the Jiang Sect Leader.

Whether it be accidental or not, Lan Xichen and the one dressed in purple robes took a closer look at the maiden.. that of course had to be the one assigned to the oldest ones room.

,,Ouch.."

,,She's dead.."

The first to whisper something was Jingyi, the second Jin Ling, both got a glance from the seniors for it and put their heads down. They quickly went about eating in silence again.

,,How incompetent can a single person be.."

Jiang Cheng didn't take note of those that were eating, his tone arrogant and full of disgust. The maiden's head hung low, shaking visibly while stammering words.

,,Who's meal was that?"

,,Yo-"

,,Stop stammering. Speak properly or leave."

,,It was your meal, Sandu-Shengshou.."

Jiang Cheng chuckled while shaking his head, could it get any better at this rate?

,,I'm so sorry.. I.. I will go and prepare something new-"

,,I pass. With your talent you would even fail to make out a difference between sugar and salt. Or worse salt and spice, and that while one has color and the other doesn't."

The maiden at this point simply left, more than likely unable to cope with the other's aura any longer; or the shame.

,,Uncle, let me help you.."

Jin Ling got up as the maiden left, holding a tissue in his hand as he more naturally tried to go about wiping his senior down.

,,Don't bother. I still have a robe in my room, I'll go back."

,,Jiang Cheng, you can't just not eat anything again."

Both Jin Ling and his uncle turned their heads to Wei Wuxian who had spoken up. The one dressed in purple had by then taken the tissue out of his nephews hand.

,,It might be unconventional but.. We have enough food, how about we each give up a portion of something, so that Sandu-Shengshou can have his meal?"

It was a little ironic for those few that knew who he really was to have Sizhui speak up and want to help Jiang Cheng.

Before he could even turn the offer down, the first to place his untouched bowl of rice on a spot on the table beside him was Lan Xichen. The juniors then all together joined in, even Wei Ying after a bit of hesitating.

,,I must say that the night out truly helped you grow. All three of you."

They went about more or less ignoring Jiang Cheng so he would have an even harder time trying to go against them, or even say anything. While the Lan Sect juniors smiled a little shyly yet proud, Jin Ling went bright red and was about to curse at the older Jade out of reflex.

However, they all then paused and glanced at one another secretly as they noticed movement. The only one to stare openly was Wei Wuxian of course, grinning at Jiang Cheng who sat with his unchanging mad expression at the side of the table. His spot was more or less between Jin Ling and Lan Xichen.

It took a moment or two before normality sank back in, or at least somewhat since not even Jin Ling was used to dining with his uncle anymore - especially not in that large of a group.

That didn't last too long though, because when Jiang Cheng leaned forward and picked up his chopsticks..

,,Did you really just give me the stuff you sorted out 'cause you don't like it?"

From the sound of Jiang Cheng's voice, it wasn't even an actual question, yet at first no one knew what he was talking about - at least until Wei Ying spoke up in such a confused, innocent tone.

,,Mh? I don't know what you're talking about!"

While Jiang Cheng glared, Wei Wuxian kept grinning and.. what most couldn't see was that a smirk had formed on Lan Wangji's lips - on the side that most weren't able to see.

It wasn't until moments later that the youngest senior spoke up again in half a hurried somewhat panicked tone.

,,Eh, you don't have to eat that!"

Everyone had gone back to eating in silence, most more stiff than usually due to this weird gathering that had formed. As Wei Ying spoke though, they all looked at him, who in turn stared at Jiang Cheng, who in turn kept eating like nothing was going on - causing his former brother to talk again.

,,You don't even like that.."

,,And?"

Jiang Cheng only spoke after having a sip of water, his tone detached yet his gaze fixed on Wei Wuxian as he put his cup down.

,,It doesn't matter if I favour the taste of something. What fills my stomach, fills my stomach. My insides don't care, neither do I. In general the food isn't overly my taste, but even I know how to show basic respect with eating what's placed in front of me without being picky."

The Juniors and Wen Ning were honestly quite confused, even more so as Lan Xichen then spoke up as well in his usual tone.

,,I must agree. Even when young master Jiang was a student at the Cloud Recesses he never talked negatively about the meals he got served, nor did he leave anything on his plate."

To Wei Wuxian's surprise, Lan Wangji nodded; he hadn't spoken a word once.


	85. Chapter 85

,,How come that you know the Lan's Sect rules, and you lived there as well?"

Jin Ling spoke up in pure confusion, almost to the extent where he grew frustrated.

The seniors in turn exchanged a glance before the oldest of them spoke in a more gentle, teacher like tone.

,,Many years ago, for a long time, the Lan Sect opened it's doors to junior cultivators of other sects. No matter the sect the disciple was from, everyone would learn together. Wangji, young master Wei and young master Jiang were all in the same class. Your father, Jin Zixuan, was also in the same class as them, just like young master Nie."

This time the juniors exchanged glances, completely confused and shocked.

,,How long was the time for the exchange disciples to study within the Cloud Recesses?"

,,1 year."

Jingyi had spoken up, to everyone's surprise Jiang Cheng answered to his question in a calm, yet somewhat empty tone.

,,Success rates?"

,,For a long time it were 100%.. However, in one generation 2 disciples failed to graduate.."

,,Who would be that dumb?"

Jingyi and Jin Ling had spoken up at the same time, a mere second after Lan Xichen had finished answering Jingyi's question. While the two Jade's smiled faintly to themselves, everyone was shocked as Jiang Cheng chuckled and Wei Wuxian seemed to grow panicked and flustered.

,,Senior Wei.. please don't tell me.."

,,HEY!! I wasn't the only one, okay?!"

Sizhui couldn't believe it, yet his adoptive father tried to protest loudly - only to be cut off by Lan Xichen who cleared his throat.

,,Young master Wei only studied within the Cloud Recessed for three months before leaving. However, he would've easily been able to graduate as one of the best, if it wouldn't have been for his..."

,,- reckless behaviour and inability to shut his trap."

It was for the briefest of moments yet the juniors could've sworn the older Jade had to hold back a chuckle as Jiang Cheng finished his sentence for him in such a.. Jiang Cheng manner.

,,Who was the other person..?"

A bit of time had passed where they all grew silent and went back to eating. Here and there the Juniors would glance at Jiang Cheng, it was so strange to see him.. be human, eat, with no real emotion taking him over. Only the older Jade and Wei Wuxian could every so often notice a faint hint of displeasure from the way he chewed, or picked something up with his chopsticks.

The seniors all looked at Jin Ling who had spoken up with a bit of hesitation, then they exchanged a look before Lan Xichen spoke again. His tone this time.. a lot more soft than usually, almost melancholic.

,,The other person was Sect Leader Nie."

Even though none of the Juniors spoke up, they couldn't hide that they weren't overly surprised.

At the end the first to finish his meal was Lan Wangji, then Wei Wuxian and one after another the Juniors. Jiang Cheng finished short after, the two married ones had at that point already left and went outside.

,,Uncle.."

Jin Ling had raised his voice a little, his tone somewhat desperate as he watched the one dressed in purple get up. Jiang Cheng then turned, causing Jin Ling to hesitate but a faint touch on his back made him finish his sentence at the end.

,,Will you come and join us again today..?"

The Jiang Sect leader raised a brow,.. yet whether he said what he did at the end because of the defeated look on his nephews face, or due to how Lan Xichen looked at him - who knew.

,,Maybe. I will go and get changed first."

The youngest ones eyes widened, but his uncle had already turned and left. At this point the juniors all got up, as well as the older Jade.

,,Jin Ling, let's go get our reports so we can give them to Zewu-Jun and go back outside."

Sizhui said in a rather neutral tone, once the Lan's had bowed in respect to their senior.

,,I'll come in a minute."

The Lan disciples were a little confused, but they left either way. It was easy to forget that the one that slowly turned into something like a friend for them was going to be on the same pedestal as Lan Xichen and Jiang Cheng soon.

,,Is there something you wanted to talk to me about, young master Jin?"

Lan Xichen asked, he stared at the boy with such a gentle and loving gaze that the one dressed in gold grew even more unsure. Jin Ling's gaze was flickering about, holding his father's sword in his hands as he chewed on his lips - how was he supposed to be around someone so different to his uncle?

,,.. Y-... You said that.. my father was a guest disciple as well.."

The Jade nodded, not that the boy that held his head low from being so embarrassed and weirdly intimidated could see.

,,How was he..?"

,,He was... Extremely intelligent, yet that paired with his status and the gift of his appearance.. Your father let it get the best of him, yet in the right moments he could be brave. He was strong, brave and earned himself true honor already in an age similar to yours. Apart from that, he matured well, yet he was.. somewhat shy, as far as I know. However, whoever you may ask, he loved you and your mother more than anything, young master Jin."

Lan Xichen didn't even need to look at the boy to know in how much pain he was. The aching for answers, yet getting them making it all just even more painful - He knew all of that perfectly fine himself.

,,And my uncle..?"

The older ones expression grew even softer as his brows raised in minimal surprise. They both knew that the junior was interested in that, yet also that he needed to change the topic - not that Lan Xichen minded it.

,,Young master Jiang.. Mmh.. He was really not all that different from how you are, young master. He always had a bit of a temper, yet.. between the two of us, he has always had this bunch of insecurity inside of him. In truth, all of those worries were illusions. Young master Jiang was never bad at anything, mostly above average. Even in a young age, he might've been able to easily get ahead of the 4 that were ranked above him, if he would've just believed in himself being able to do so instead of-"

,,Instead of just looking at who was better, or naturally able to do more than him.. The gh-.. I mean, Senior Wei already said something similar.. it sounds almost as if he.. as if my uncle put an invisible chain around himself, one that only existed and held him down in his mind."

,,The mind is the most powerful ally, yet at the same time the most powerful enemy one can have. Please keep that in mind, young master Jin."

Jin Ling was staring up at the Jade that was still a lot taller than him, eyes wide open and full of admiration. It was the first time where he really had close contact with the older Lan and also one of the first times that someone spoke to him like that.

At the end however, just like the young version of his father, once Jin Ling realised, he blushed bright red. Then he quickly bowed, hurridly said a few words of gratitude and left.. leaving a softly chuckling Lan Xichen standing there alone.


	86. Chapter 86

After Jin Ling had left, Lan Xichen had gone back to his room. It didn't take long before a maiden came to hand him the written essays of the juniors. Going through them, the Jade was honestly rather surprised about how well written and detailed they were while being worded quite maturely as well.

Especially Jin Ling's was an interesting read. It was the first time that he had something from the future Langlin Jin Sect leader in his hand, and like Wen Ning he could say that those 3 were definitely going to have quite the future ahead of them, if they wouldn't tragically lose their paths.

By the time he was done reviewing and comparing the Juniors visions with his own everyone else had gathered outside. They were making so much noise that even Lan Xichen couldn't help but be drawn to the scene out of curiosity.

To his surprise, no matter from which sect or rank, everyone had gathered around their sculpture spot.. or not around their spot, it were simply so many people that they took over the entire area. The closer Lan Xichen came, the more eyes were on him,.. until he finally realised that they were all gathering around and staring at "his" snowman.

The only one that wore an expression as if he knew something was wrong, yet he couldn't figure out what, was Wei Wuxian. He also was the only one that didn't immediately run to the older Lan brother to throw compliments at him, or ask how he had managed such a perfect creation - especially one that big, when he had made it..

,,Not bad."

As loud as everyone had been, silence broke out as Jiang Cheng spoke up, his tone surprisingly calm and honest - not that anyone knew that he was being everything but honest. Acting further, he walked towards the snowman and around it before nodding in a accepting like manner.

,,Isn't this the most perfect snowman you have seen so far, uncle?"

Jin Ling asked, so hyped up there was no place in his body for fear left. Jiang Cheng kept talking in the same tone while Lan Xichen couldn't get out a word, his gaze fixed on the snowman yet out of the corners of his dark eyes he stared at the younger sect leader. There was a faint pink tint on his cheeks, his smile as gentle as always yet more shy.

,,I guess."

,,Are you blind? I mean look at that!"

Jin Ling continued, tugging on his uncles sleeve to force him to walk another round around the snowman.

,,The entire surface has not a single dent or bump! The snowman is as tall as him and each section fits perfectly!! That's insane! Even the details.. who has an eye for such stuff to place it on so accurately.."

Everyone around Jin Ling agreed, some more and others less loudly. Glancing over, Jiang Cheng could see the embarrassment on his one night stand's face.. yet he wouldn't be able to blow his cover, which made this kind of humiliation just so much better. - Little did the Jiang Sect leader know that there were so many more covers to blow on Lan Xichen's side.

,,Alright, now calmed down! Instead of just staring at other people's work we should try to do something even better!"

Jin Ling spoke in such a leader like manner, while looking so similar to his father that for a moment those that were old enough to have a flashback of Jin Zixuan paused. All those that weren't old enough were just as hyped before they all spread into all sorts of directions again.

,,What a speech."

Jingyi couldn't help but tease, nudging the youngest in the side with his elbow, only to have a furiously blushing Jin Ling glare at him before an elbow landed in his own stomach.

,,Not fair.."

,,If you two won't stop I'll behead your snowman's."

While everyone had been caught up in the moment and a whirlwind of emotions.. now everyone's heads turned in a split second. Not a soul on this planet had expected Sizhui to tame his two demons with such a threat and he looked serious as well.. okay.. he did for a second before he bursted out laughing loudly from the way his two friends looked.

Jin Ling began to pout in his mistress way, turning his head, chin up, arms crossing in front of his chest - Jingyi in turn went up to his fellow sect member and tugged at the front of his robe, saying in a whining tone.

,,Don't scare us like that! It was just fun.. just fun, you know.."

,,I was also just making fun.. well.. maybe.."

,,Sizhui!"

At this point the married one's had already sat back down a while ago.. witnessing the scene though, Wei Ying leaned against his other half's shoulder who in turn put a hand on his knee. They were such softies deep down inside..

However, as Sizhui and Jingyi were having a moment.. no one had paid attention to Jin Ling and.. a second after Sizhui had turned to look at Jingyi who was standing in front of him after having let go of his robe.. something hit Sizhui's face and Jin Ling yelled at the same time.

,,I'll give you fun in a second!"

Some seconds paused where everyone stared in confusion and surprise before Jingyi burst out laughing just like Jin Ling.. the snowball had left a white spot on the back of the married couple's son's head.

,,You two.."

The younger juniors slowly began to back of, their expressions clear version's of "I fucked up".. it was quite amusing to see how easily Lan Sizhui could switch off his expression's to make it impossible to see what was going through his head.

,,Sizhui.. please.. We already have no dry or clean clothes left.. show mercy.."

,,Mmh.."

Jingyi had tried to beg for himself and Jin Ling.. and for a few seconds the oldest of them made it seem as if he was debating. However, Jin Ling and Jingyi were standing so close to one another that backing off wasn't even an option any longer as within the blink of an eye.. Sizhui beheaded his own snowman and threw the entire bunch of snow at them; hitting them hard.

,,You really trained him frighteningly well, Lan Zhan.."

,,Mmn."

Wei Wuxian had whispered, he was getting into the show, yet at the same time ready to run - not to speak of him being somewhat afraid of his adoptive son's physical strength. Lan Wangji in turn only hummed, he was secretly quite proud.


	87. Chapter 87

,,Why me?! He got you!"

,,You're shameless enough to whine around. You deserve to be hit just for that!"

Even though it had started off a scene between Sizhui vs two, it had turned back into the typical Jingyi vs Jin Ling and vice versa somehow. It was a bad idea for them to turn a blind eye to the oldest though, because before they could go on bickering each of them was hit with a quite a huge ball again.

Within moments the situation turned into the clumsiest try at a snowball war.. they hit every so often and made a lot of noise about it - whether they did or did not.

Wei Ying and his other half sooner or later decided to rather leave, not that far though - only to the tea stand where they drank while watching the scene half in horror, half in pure amusement.. Lan Wangji was the first, his husband the latter.

As no one was paying attention to them in the middle of the bloody war Jiang Cheng and Lan Xichen had somehow ended up beside one another. They were far enough away, but still dangerously close - to both: one another and the kids.

,,Is that normal..?"

Jiang Cheng glanced at the other that had spoken up after a while in a rather low, a tad worried tone.. He in turn however used a bit of a mocking tone.

,,That they don't hit? No."

There was it again, this for such a brief second barely visible pout on the Jade's face. It really seemed as if the prim and proper Lan Sect leader couldn't stand his curiosity not getting satisfied with proper answers.

,,It's pretty normal. They're really not good at it though."

Lan Xichen turned his head only so little that it would be hard to see for most, glancing down he let out a hum - there were too many things on this earth he didn't quite understand.

,,I've seen children play with snow before, I never understood the meaning behind it. I usually enjoy the sight of everything being covered in a layer of snow so much, I feel.. complicated having it destroyed.."

,,It's just one of the things caused from your upbringing. You can't stand a seemingly perfect something change because you're only used to one thing."

The younger one let those words out so naturally, his tone not overly harsh but he wasn't sugar-coating a thing either; it just wasn't his character.. It still caused the other to avert his gaze fully again and grow quite silent.

,,Even though I must admit that there's nothing better to see than Lotus Pier snowed under.. You might never get to know what you could turn something you believe to be perfect into, if you just take a tiny portion and do something new with it."

Jiang Cheng noticed that he was turning the older ones attention back towards him, yet he didn't get an answer. Not like he needed one, he knew there was nothing to argue his basic point with.

,,You can build things with snow.. something like a house.. different animals.. you can even form ice if you want to.. you can slide on ice, as long as it's thick enough.. or you can do what those idiots are doing."

,,Slide on ice.. isn't that-"

,,Dangerous?"

The Jiang Sect leader chuckled, a smirk playing on his lips. He had expected to get the other to speak up with a point of his list, not necessarily that one though.

,,I don't want to repeat something he has said at all but.. We fly on swords, what's more dangerous there? You just have to pay attention to only go on the ice when it's the coldest and not to go too far away from the shore."

The older one of them could only nod slowly, his head was despite the cold running haywire with a crap load of questions.

It was quite out of nowhere as while Lan Xichen stared into space the younger one swiftly changed his position so they were facing one another. A moment later however Jiang Cheng closed his eyes and gritted his teeth, while Jin Ling yelled in a slight threatening manner, the Lan Disciple in turn spoke in such a apologetic, shaken up tone.

,,Jingyi!"

,,I'm so sorry, Sandu Shengshou."

The snowball fight came to a hold, the married ones that had been drinking tea slowly approached due to that and the over all commotion. Only the older Jade could notice that there was something off, even as Jiang Cheng opened his eyes and played it down in his usual manner.

,,You really suck at aiming. If you'd be in my sect you'd go through some days without food and nothing but extra training. At least you hit something for once."

Jingyi who already looked like a kicked dog was hit by the scolding glares of his two friends. Wei Wuxian wore again the expression of suspicion, yet before either of them all could move Lan Xichen spoke up, his tone quite "professional" like as he took a step aside to look at his juniors.

,,Jingyi, kneel down as a punishment for one hour. Think about what you have done wrong and afterwards you and Sizhui will train with young master Wei how to aim. While this activity might be entertaining, you're not allowed to engage in it again until you are able to engage in it without the possibility being there of harming someone who's not involved."

,,Jin Ling, you will join them both."

Even without taking a look at his nephew, Jiang Cheng knew perfectly fine that he looked arrogant and pissed because his fun had been interrupted. After hearing his uncles words though, Jin Ling looked just as much like a abandoned pup as Jingyi.

Without saying another word, or even looking at anyone around him the Jiang Sect leader then walked away. While the juniors all together went about taking the punishment one of them had gotten together,.. Wei Wuxian touched his chin before closing the gap between himself and where Jiang Cheng had stood.


	88. Chapter 88

,,What are you thinking about?"

It was the first time in forever that without the juniors taking note of it Lan Wangji had spoken up. He knew his husband, even the older Jade had grown suspicious..

Wei Wuxian didn't reply though, instead he bend down and picked up the snowball that was still in perfect shape.

,,Young master Wei..?"

Wen Ning had appeared, he had grown just as suspicious about it all.

,,That's not really snow.."

,,What do you mean, young master Wei?"

This time it was the Lan sect leader who spoke, his tone somewhat worried - even more so because the expression of his brother in law appeared to be a rather troubled one as well.

,,I don't think it was on purpose.. but that's a bunch of completely frozen snow. It's not even the imperfect way Jingyi makes his snowballs. It must be one someone else has made, but probably let go off.."

Wei Wuxian knelt there for a moment longer before getting up, his brow raised. It took some seconds longer until he realised that everyone around him didn't have a clue what he was talking about.

,,It's quite possible that a kid from the Nie Sect made it but was called in for food. Over night as the temperatures dropped it froze.. Jingyi must've picked it up without realising in the heat of the moment."

,,Younger ones of the Wen Sect had the habit of making such balls to throw them at me the next day.. It's like getting hit from a stone, or a ball of ice.."

,,Mmh, it hurts. Can make quite the damage as well."

The Lan's weren't quite sure what was more unsettling, the over all thought, Wen Ning's past, or how easily the two friends were conversing about such matters. It took a bit for the initial shock to subside for Lan Xichen to speak up in realisation.

,,You mean.."

,,With his hairstyle it's possible that it didn't hurt at all.. At the same time, it's quite possible that he got quite the cut on his head right now as well. Years back Jiang Cheng would've shrugged something like that off, but right now.. I don't know, we're not on that good terms, but it doesn't seem like he gets injured often anymore, especially not at the head."

Wei Wuxian shrugged before using some of his energy to crush the ball so it wouldn't be able to cause any more purposeful or accidental harm.

,,Shouldn't someone go and look after young master Jiang..?"

,,Do you wanna go? There's no one here who wouldn't get lashed out at by him anyway."

Even though Wen Ning had a point, the former Yiling Patriarch couldn't help but mock him with the truth.

,,I'll go. It would be my duty either way since the possible injury was inflicted by my sects disciple."

Wei Ying shrugged again, a clear "Good luck" kind of gesture while the younger Jade nodded and Wen Ning bowed slightly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From here the story will branch off to XiCheng for a bit again


	89. XiCheng 61

It was really quite awkward to stand in front of the Jiang Sect leaders door again after... Let's just say that there were quite a few things running through Lan Xichen's mind and he honestly felt bad for the other since.. if he already felt like turning and running then..

Letting out a heavy sigh, the Jade then knocked and hesitantly opened the door as he didn't get a reply before going in. To his surprise the younger one was sitting behind the table, arm resting on it while his forehead was resting in his hand.

,,Are you alright..?"

Jiang Cheng looked up a moment after the other had asked in his worried, gentle, rather low tone. His brow was raised, expression impossible to read.

,,So, Wei Wuxian noticed, huh?"

The Jade nodded slowly, a little smile playing on his lips that didn't fully reach his darker colored eyes.

,,You did that on purpose. Even though I wasn't paying enough attention, I know you were."

,,I don't know what you're talking about."

Jiang Cheng feigned ignorance, shrugging as he reached with his left hand to the back of his head. Rubbing for a moment, as he pulled it away and turned it so the taller one could see..

,,Oh my goodness, A-Cheng.."

Call it a bit of a payback moment, or just the younger males side acting up that liked to get spoiled. Within a moment Lan Xichen had blurted out those few words in a tone full of worry and shock as he already moved and stepped behind Jiang Cheng who silently smirked to himself.

,,I'm so sorry.. If you would've reacted differently I would've given Jingyi harder punishment.."

This time the one born in Yunmeng couldn't help but chuckle, the Jade was meanwhile trying to find the source of the blood.

,,It's not like it's his fault that he's lacking the knowledge.. Not like I'm gonna die."

,,There's nothing to laugh about here! Isn't it painful and uncomfortable.."

,,Actually... I'm feeling a bit dizzy.. I had a hard time even reaching my room without collapsing.."

Trapped in his state of panic the taller male didn't get at all that he was being played.. yet at the end Jiang Cheng paid his price for it as from the last wave of words hitting Lan Xichen's from guilt ridden mind he pressed on the wound and the younger one let out a curse.

,,Oh god.. I'm sorry.."

,,Stop the apologising already. You're sounding more and more like Nie HuaiSang, it's off-putting.."

Lan Xichen paused, he was standing there behind the younger one almost like a servant of some kind with no real idea about what he should do. At the end Jiang Cheng spoke while filling two cups with tea - not that the Jade noticed there had been two placed on the table before he had arrived there already.

,,Tell me, how do you like your snowman?"

,,Oh.."

While Jiang Cheng sounded somewhat soft and cheeky, the noise the other let out was full of surprise and made it clear he hadn't expected that question.

,,So it was you who build it."

,,Mmh."

Judging from the Jiang Sect leaders reaction it didn't seem as if the Jade's cover had been blown the night before. The smaller one only hummed while taking a sip of his tea.


	90. XiCheng 62

,,How did you get the surface so even..?"

,,Warm water. You just have to be careful not to use too much of it, then go over the surface again and again."

Lan Xichen paused in his movement for a moment, he had taken a step to the side and forward to reach for his cup.. just that the "go over the surface again and again" part made him think about this and that. At the end, Jiang Cheng saw that out of the corner of his eyes as he smirked on the side the older one couldn't see while just mentioned one had to clear his throat before being able to say more.

,,I must say that it's quite outstanding.. you even gave it shoes made of snow.. Anyway, how are you? I always carry around pain reducing medicine, if you need it.. I could treat your wound as well with some herbs."

,,I wouldn't say no to that.. However, how are you?"

The Jade tensed again, he was quite sure about what the other had meant - it was only that Jiang Cheng appeared to be rather calm, maybe relaxed. His tone was still rather close to the one he had used for so many years, yet a lot more nonchalant in a strangely normal, yet intimate way.

,,What.. I'm alright.."

While Jiang Cheng couldn't hold back a chuckle, the taller one of them couldn't hide his flustered state.

,,You sure? I mean.. I fucked up pretty hard at the end.. Aren't you quite.. horny right now because of that, Huan?"

,,Wanyin!"

The younger male had barely managed to catch the cup the other had let go of mid air, a second later his one night stand had spoken up in such a scolding like flustered tone.. Jiang Cheng didn't care though, he was smirking so seductively, his expression full of content as he turned to stare up at the other. As he spoke his tone matched his expression, just that it was a bit more of a tease than seductive.

,,So you do know my name."

,,What kind of a question is that, of course I do.."

Lan Xichen responded while trying to turn away, he really needed to collect himself but.. the younger one got a hold of his wrist, pulling him back around. The Jade glanced down for a brief second, yet he couldn't keep the eye contact due to how pleased Jiang Cheng looked and how intense his stare was - not at all because in their current position certain parts of his body were in perfect reach for something.

,,Of course what? Of course you feel the need for something? Why don't you just say so straight away..~"

,,That's not.."

Even though the Lan Sect leader wanted to protest, his flushed face only went redder as he looked down with a slight glare at first and the sight he got was quite something. Regardless of their clear age difference, the younger one looked so mature and seductive, while placing the seniors hand on his wounded cheek in such a soft manner. Hot and cold, soft and rough, who would've guessed that they were both so good at going back and forth with that?

The Jade hesitated, looking around he noticed that all the windows weren't shut off from curtains at all, which could lead to quite the scene.. However, he turned his head back around and looked at the other as he felt more weight lean into the touch.

,,You really intend to let it form a scar?"

,,One more or less doesn't really matter in my case, does it?"

While Lan Xichen's tone had been a bit of a spaced out one, the younger males was a strange mixture of provocation and simply being straightforward and honest.. It regardless made the Lan Sect leader frown slightly.

,,So at the end you can be all over me with this mess of a body being completely exposed, but when I get a scar on my face it's done?"

Of course Jiang Cheng would misunderstand, it was like one of his skills. The smaller one had chuckled, let go of the others hand and turned away - only for Lan Xichen to turn his head back around with a gentle touch to the others cheek.

,,I told you before already that having your life written over your body doesn't bother me, A-Cheng.. For me it's this way, for others it might not be."

As their eyes met, the one dressed in purple robes could see some conflict in Lan Xichen's, yet they were strangely soft at the same time.

,,My reputation is already so bad, this one thing won't make it that much worse. At the end, if I get cast out even more, then I at least know who to rely on and who not to. If they judge without knowing the meaning behind it, it's not really my problem."

,,You'll only stand out more.. If you change, many will be drawn to you.."

The taller one of them didn't even take note of what he had said for a bit, not until Jiang Cheng spoke up in a bit of a teasing tone the more he said.

,,People that only get drawn to me after I change.. I'll take note of them, appreciate it in its own way and I understand it.. but I'm not a fool that would forget how they were before.. You however.. if I wouldn't know that it's against your sects many rules, I would think that you don't want that to happen.. that you're almost a tad jealous."

It was funny to see, or come to realise, how bad of an actor the Jade was due to how he stuttered and his face flushed from being found out - well, more than likely. The younger one in turn smirked, turning on his chair as he spread his legs before pulling the other closer.

,,Don't worry, I'll keep it a secret.. It's only because I didn't take proper care of you last time and you have something build up.."

,,Nonsense.."

Lan Xichen tensed, he could easily free himself but at the same time he couldn't - He was like a moth getting drawn in from the light and none of the words the other said were untrue. The Jiang Sect leader raised his brows, licking over his lower lip as his aura went darker again. His tone such a seductive like tease, his voice going lower as the words turned more and more into a sin no one else should hear.

,,Nonsense? Are you trying to confess about having found relief all on your own since then?~"


	91. XiCheng 63

As the older one looked at him in pure shock, almost on the verge of being ready to beg for such words to never be said again.. Jiang Cheng got up. The Lan Sect leader tried to avoid him, yet ultimately ended up getting himself trapped between the wall and the other.

,Are you really trying to make me believe that when you came here.. when you entered this room, nothing went on inside your mind? .. Or that when you were alone you weren't thinking of anything.. Or when you see me, when my scent lingers,.. or when you hear my voice, you think of absolutely nothing..?"

Lan Xichen couldn't do a lot of things.. He couldn't lie and say it wasn't how Jiang Cheng thought. He couldn't even avoid the younger males gaze, nor stop his heartbeat from speeding up, or his breathing to hitch. It didn't help much, not at all in fact, that the Jiang Sect leader pressed his lower half against him, only faintly but enough, one of his hands beside the taller males head while the other was placed on the Jade's waist.

The taller one of them then dug his own grave as he finally managed to avert his gaze, only to end up staring at the door that led outside of the room. Of course, as Jiang Cheng took a glance back, his smirk only grew wider as his hand trailed between the others legs.

,,So you're completely fine..?~ What happened to the man that wanted to take me up against that door..?~ What else did you think of, Huan..? Bend over the table?~ I know I'd do that.."

Lan Xichen had no way to go.. Closing his eyes only meant that the imaginations grew even more vivid, keeping his eyes open while the other talked like that made him only imagine more, no matter the direction he looked at. His body stopped obeying within moments only as Jiang Cheng began to rub him through his many, yet thin layers and like the younger male had guessed: There was quite the need resting underneath the Lan Sect leaders calm facade from not having the final relief until then.

,,Not like that.."

,,Mh?"

The one born in Yunmeng only paused as the other finally spoke up, the tone of the Jade a terrible try to sound collected gone wrong. Jiang Cheng in turn looked so pleased with himself as his hand trailed from the growing problem back to the taller ones hip.

A shudder went through Lan Xichen, who looked somewhat pained as the pleasurable sensation stopped. He needed a moment before he could speak in the same tone as before, only a tad lower in volume.

,,It'll be a mess if.."

Jiang Cheng snorted, bursting out in a bit of laughter as he leaned his head against the taller males chest, sadly missing the frown and pout of the Jade due to that.

,,You really make me stop, so you won't cum in your clothes?"

The Jiang Sect leader wasn't fully done with his fit, yet he stood back upright and crossed his arms in front of his chest, catching a glare of the other for the briefest of moments.

,,Well, it would be quite uncomfortable to walk around like that but.. If you want to take me up against the door, imagine the mess that would fly around then. If it's just that though.."

Before Lan Xichen could escape, which he was visibly about to do.. Jiang Cheng smirked and kneeled down at the same time as he pulled down the others pants. It really wasn't half as much of a struggle for him to engage in gay matters as long as he was the "man" - If the roles would be reversed and the Jade would turn him around and bend him over the table while pulling his pants down.. that wouldn't have happened with just a bright red face as the only means of fighting back like it did right now with Lan Xichen being exposed.

,,What are you.."

As the first shock subsided, the Lan Sect leader pulled his outer robe over his half hardened length and his tone was so virgin like that it was actually damn cute and hilarious at the same time.

,,Do you want me to spell it out for you or are you able to recall on your own?"

The one dressed in purple couldn't hide his amusement at all. He was kneeling there, face at the perfect height, staring up at the other with a smirk playing on his lips - it was so obvious what he had intended to do.

,,I'm not even.."

Jiang Cheng raised a brow as the reasons his first time partner gave him grew more and more ridicilous.

,,If you want to get yourself up then go along. It's my fault that you're pent up anyway and would've been my task either way before, so.."

,,It's in the middle of the day.. we didn't even close the curtains.."

If it wouldn't be for the amusement factor of it all the younger sect leader would've at this point just slapped the others hand away and gone at it.. like that though, he only sighed and replied in a know-it-all like tone.

,,No one comes to my room, the kids are pre-occupied, food won't be ready until 6.. and if you'd think about it, if you close the curtains now it would be a lot more suspicious wouldn't it?"

,,It's okay, I'm-"

As the older male clearly ran out of points to use and was about to start his entire "I'm fine, no need" tour again.. Well, Jiang Cheng had brushed the others hands away with minimal force yet without hurting the other.

The Lan sect leader's words weren't cut off from that though.. He had continued to protest until Jiang Cheng had reached out and wrapped his hand around the aching half hardened length of his. The grip was tight, yet not too tight, the slowest of stroking motions starting that caused Lan Xichen's eyes to fall shut.

,,You're what? Huan, you should know by now that the more you say such stuff the more you provoke me to actually do something.."

,,But.."

As much as he tried, there were two things that couldn't lie. Number one was the aching look in his eyes, number two the fast growing part of his that the smaller male was tending to.


	92. XiCheng 64

,,I want it, you want it. There's a lot more noise going on outside than during the night so it's even less likely someone will notice.. there, hold your robe. I'll be a bit preoccupied now so.."

Before the older one could try to argue further, Jiang Cheng had let go of his length and brought the robes of the other together, forcing Lan Xichen to pretty much hold it out of the way. It was such a embarrassing situation that the Jade didn't dare look down, his face flushed as he held onto his robe.

The faked composure faded quickly though, as the younger sect leaders more daring side came out again. Within seconds, probably also to keep his own mind from overthinking and retreating, Jiang Cheng leaned in and wrapped his lips rather loosely around the others tip that was by then already covered from the first hints of lust.

Even though their bodies knew it all already, it was for both of them all equally as new. The night before they had been quite intoxicated, right now they were completely sober. While Jiang Cheng's mouth was now getting taken over by nothing but the others strong, yet not off-putting taste other than previously where the strong taste of alcohol had lingered - The taller male felt more intensely, at least it seemed like it to him, more than likely also because there was no excuse of drunkenness present this time and the other still..

Lan Xichen had tensed briefly at the first contact, yet his body relaxed a moment later as he let out a shaky soft breath. He felt weak on his legs already now, and that while his lover noticeably only went about teasing him more than anything. It wasn't like him to grow impatient but after the third time where Jiang Cheng switched from those teasing like sucks around his tip to jerking him off in such a slow pace..

,,Stop teasing already.."

Well, as the taller one said that in a bit of a whining, yet mildly warning type of tone while looking down.. He couldn't help but glare as the Jiang Sect leader knelt there with such a pleased and amused look on his face as he stared up at him.

,,What sides you're secretly keeping hidden Huan..~ So impatience is another one of your dirty little secrets, huh?~"

Jiang Cheng had raised his brows, his smirk growing wider as his tone matched his expression just that it sounded more seductive and pleased than amused. As he got another glare thrown at him, his sadistic side popped back up: Trailing his thumb over the older males slit he spoke again in a tone barely above a whisper while the others eyes fell shut.

,,What if I don't stop?~ Will you try to teach me a lesson?~"

The chuckle the Jade let out was a tad more dark this time, smirking as his eyes glimmered with want as he stared down at the smaller one of them. It was another one of those situations where their roles weren't clear, or well.. they were both quite top like, which also got audible as Lan Xichen spoke in his sweet as honey, dangerously seductive tone.

,,If you keep going on like this I might start to think you want me to, A-Cheng.. Or I might let go and embrace you to my hearts content.. maybe I should abandon the idea of bending you over inside of this room against the door and alter it to the outside.."

Lan Xichen's expression only grew more smug as for a few seconds the smaller male lost control, or track of reality.. The grip around his length tightened and the strokes went a lot more passionate and eager - it must've hit the tsundere quite a bit, the imagination. Even Jiang Cheng's expression wavered, pulling on his lower lip as his legs moved only a little; showing his discomfort in certain areas.

,,I wouldn't let go of you after one time, so think carefully if you don't want anyone to realise, A-Cheng.."

It was the hardest of tasks for the Lan Sect leader to hold back a few noises of pleasure that wanted to escape, the way his lover was tending to him right now was quite his cup of tea.

However, as serious as the older one looked and as much as they had done drunk so far.. The imagination the deeper it sank, the more absurd it began to sound for the one born in Yunmeng. He couldn't quite believe that the guy he had always envied to an extent would do such a thing.. and so he snapped out of it as he chuckled at the same time.

,,You aren't even able to jerk yourself off in front of someone.. So, I'm sorry but I don't quite believe you'd go that far where others could see."

Jiang Cheng knew that he could be digging his own grave as well, but were his words that far from the truth? A few moments later he'd end up a little shocked though because the taller males hand found its way to the back of his head, gently bringing him closer to the length that was leaking and twitching more and more by then.

,,Why should I waste my time on that when I have someone here who's making me feel so much better?~"

The younger one couldn't help but shake his head a little, his right brow raised as he let out a barely audible chuckle.

,,Greed.. another sin in your sect.. You want me to make you feel even better, mh?~"

For a moment Jiang Cheng could've sworn the Jade winked at him as he got gently pushed a bit closer. There was no need for more words, the wild god's tone from before had said it all, just like his expression and over all body language.

,,What happens in the bedroom stays there, those were your own words..~"

,,We're not in a bedroom though, Huan.. so.."

,,The space where one may rest mustn't be restricted to four walls with a certain name.. We can turn wherever we want into a bedroom, Wanyin~"


	93. XiCheng 65

The last thing on earth the younger sect leader had expected was such a straightforward invitation for "wherever, whenever" yet.. Let's just say he was trapped once again into this miserable state of wanting to take as well as get taken so badly he couldn't decide. The way the Jade looked, so innocent and godly, yet with such a intense stare full of longing. The elegance embracing him regardless of all of the not so elegant things that were going on.. How manly, yet gentle he appeared..

Something had snapped once more inside of the sect leaders, yet the one born in Yunmeng was still reassuring himself with half-excuses.. It's just sex, physical needs, aching of years now finally being let out on both sides, they were simply alike.. It couldn't be anything more than that, not between men, not between two men that knew their roles in life and what they'd still need to do.

However, right now that didn't matter. They both wanted the same. They both were pretty much the same in their cores.

Letting go of the throbbing length of the wild god, Jiang Cheng leaned back and reached down. What he didn't do though was break the eye contact. He knew that Lan Xichen wouldn't be able to look away as he so provocatively let his hand slide into his lower garment. The destination was so clear, and oh how he enjoyed the flustered yet aroused expression of the other as his own expression showed seduction and relief from his own aching problem getting some attention.

Before the older male could say a word though - and they both knew he would've said something - the tsundere closed his eyes as he leaned in. Jiang Cheng's free hand wrapped around the others root, holding him in place as he closed his eyes and well..

Lan Xichen couldn't help but tug on his lovers hair.. He had expected a lot, but not that he would get embraced from the warm and wet mouth of the younger one almost all the way. Already by the second motion back, and a clumsy swirl of Jiang Cheng's wet muscle around his glans later, a moan escaped from him. They still were far away from being perfect at anything they did, far away from being able to go all the way with their mouths without it feeling uncomfortable and the gagging reflex being quite present yet.. They both felt it and that was really all that mattered - not that they knew better anyway.

It was a little something both men took note of: If one would moan, like the one born in Yunmeng did during, it would make the others reactions "worse" as well. Within only a few minutes the wild god grew weak on his knees, he was leaking a lot and twitching even more. Unable to even bother and try controlling his voice. Jiang Cheng was truly giving him a hard time, going about it so passionately and full of hunger caused by the elders own statement.

The Jiang Sect leader was suffering in pleasure meanwhile in his own way. He didn't have too much space to stroke himself, forcing his motions to be tighter yet slower. While his lovers pleasured sounds were of overwhelmed nature, his own were muffled and a tad deeper. It pissed Jiang Cheng off though when his body tried to tell him not to take Lan Xichen in as deep, as if anyone could dare try tell him what to do and get away with it.

For a few minutes the Jade was able to hold on, yet after another time of the others throat tensing around him.. He didn't use too much strength, but still enough for his length to thrust all the way in. It felt so good and for a moment he grew so tense Lan Xichen held the other that way as he let out a choked sound that made it so clear that he had been about to use a curse. At the end he only let go as Jiang Cheng had almost no air left in his lungs and patted his side a bit roughly.

,,Sorry.. that feels.. If you do that twice more.. I might be in trouble.."

The reality was that if it would happen a few more times the older one of them wouldn't be the only one "in trouble". Jiang Cheng didn't even know what it was, if he was born to be held down and used now like his former sworn brother or not because.. his knot had tightened badly as the other treated him like that.

Lan Xichen's weak, out of breath tone mixed with his own inner turmoil however.. The combination only lead Jiang Cheng to suck a few times, using his hand in between to collect himself a bit.. Once he was ready, he actually managed to tickle out a soft yet so honest curse from the taller male with leaning all the way back in. It was hard to say whether he ended up moving his tongue out of his own accord or because his body tried to get rid of the length that was getting forced so deeply into his throat.

The Jade in turn reacted with holding his head in place, at this point his hips began to faintly move out of reflex. Lan Xichen's dark gaze was glued to the scene, even though his eyelids struggled to not fall shut.. It was strangely arousing to watch the younger leader slightly toss and turn, struggle and go red in the face with eyes pressed shut. To add to the visual pleasure, it didn't go unnoticed that his lovers hand was really working its magic on the hidden length of his.

Both of their knots had tightened badly by then and the only reason why Lan Xichen let go of the smaller ones injured head was.. As just mentioned one opened his eyes, as strong as the tsundere liked to act, even he wasn't immune against tears forming in his eyes from the discomfort and gagging that was getting so loud. As little as the wild god would like to admit, and he probably would never, but the sight.. was it good or bad that it made him feel like the image would hunt him in lonely nights?


	94. XiCheng 66

,,Wanyin.. don't go past your limit.. I don't think.. that I'll be able to hold back at this rate.."

The taller one of them spoke up as the one dressed in the colors of Lotus Pier didn't even really take a pause. In fact, he only took less of the length in his mouth, tended to the remaining inches with his hand in between, eyes pressed shut again.

,,Wanyin.."

As serious as the Lan Sect leader wanted to sound, his voice was full of pleasure; nothing but a sinful moan of the others name. His hand however reached down and got a hold of the younger males shoulder, making it impossible to lean all the way in again.

Jiang Cheng was in some weird element of his.. Yes, he did have tears in his eyes, and it felt humiliating as hell, yet he neither wanted to let his body win, nor give up halfway - The imagination alone made him pissed. Apart from that, he was freaking close himself and as the wild god stopped him the only thing it caused was that.. The Jiang Sect leader glared, for a second a shimmer went through his eyes that looked quite threatening, followed from a deep growl - which made Lan Xichen lose the hold on his shoulder, the vibration almost driving him over the edge.

From there on out everything happened more accidental. The smaller male wouldn't just give up, the taller one in turn was holding his release in because he honestly wanted to enjoy it all at least a bit longer. That was good in theory, in reality though Lan Xichen was so weak on his legs that he had to hold onto the chair that was standing beside Jiang Cheng.

The shift in weight and position in turn made the Jade's length sink back into the others throat.

Jiang Cheng moaned, then gagged, tensing slightly as he fought against the urge to pull away. His own knot there, but not quite ready to rip apart just yet. It had been just as much of a weird stimulant to him to be called by his "real" name in such a manner.

,,Oh.. fuck.."

It was unclear what got the wild god to snap, but the younger one of them would get to know what he had been warned for. A mere second after the gag, before his tension had even vanished, Jiang Cheng could feel a strong yet not brutal hold on his hair. He was getting held in place, head slightly bend back,..

From this point onwards everything turned into a blur for them both; out of different reasons. Lan Xichen had let go of his robe, the other barely managed to get a hold of it before the room filled with gagging noises and the older sect leaders sinful haunted moans. No one would believe that the beloved Jade would thrust into the feared Jiang Sect Leaders mouth to his hearts content - but he did...

And strangely enough, this "loss of control" was it then for the two of them. Within moments they could feel the final build-up. At the end, the wild god released with his length getting squeezed from his lovers throat, moaning the others birth name as he did. Jiang Cheng's knot ripped as the lust of the taller male got spilled so deep into his throat that he could do nothing but try to swallow as his hand drove him over the edge.

The release of the older one was quite a lot, as expected, and being held with no way to escape really wasn't that much of a help. The Jade didn't even have the strength left, in the moment of relief, to keep his thrusting motions going. In the end Lan Xichen only managed to let go of the younger leaders head as just mentioned one was - due to his inexperience - about to run out of air.

As soon as he was able to retreat, Jiang Cheng did just that. He was still stroking over his length but stopped and started to cough without even pulling his hand out of his lower garment. The tears he had held back were now rolling down on his bright red cheeks.

They were both quite out of breath in their own ways.. yet before either of them could even calm down, or the Jiang Sect leader completely swallow the seed of the other.. Lan Xichen was trapped in some sort of state, he wasn't thinking clearly and ended up bending down. Grabbing Jiang Cheng's chin a little roughly, he slammed their lips together, causing both of them to let out a mixture of a moan and a groan.

The younger one was clearly hesitating, knowing fully well that there were parts of the release still lingering in his mouth.. But after a few moments of the wild god begging him with his tongue and soft bites to his lips, he then gave the way free. Lan Xichen took over his mouth so clearly, neither could hold back noises that made it audible they were both hungry for a lot more. It could be debated about if this shameless, his own taste not minding, Lan Xichen was not like him at all, or maybe the truest version of him.

,,Fuck.. You're really horny aren't you?~"

It wasn't really a tease, even if the Jiang Sect leaders rough and husky tone with the way he said his words might've made it seem this way. The Jade had only let go of him after a few minutes, the tears on his cheeks had by then dried away - even though some hints of them remained in his lighter colored eyes.

,,I warned you.. repeatedly.."

,,I don't even wanna imagine how long you'd have kept it in if I wouldn't have gone that far."

,,A month.. two.. maybe longer.."

,,That horny that you speak without thinking or the tiniest bit of shame?~"

This time the younger ones words were a tease. Who wouldn't have teased though? Lan Xichen was staring at him, by then kneeling down, his robes were standing that far away from his body that it was clear he was nowhere near satisfied.. Even his tone was restless, his voice and eyes full of hunger, only his slightly in pink tinted cheeks gave away some embarrassment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to say: Thank you for your patience.  
> I'm feeling a lot better already, not back at great yet but oh well. I already worked on more chapters to make up for the delay so look forward to more chapters soon! A lot of fluff and smut will come your way


	95. XiCheng 67

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There'll be like 10+ chapters coming up in a row now so feel free to come back in like 15 minutes if you don't want to wait for my slow ass having finished to upload while reading!

,,Can you blame me?"

It was faint, yet there was a tiny hint of worry of some kind lingering in Lan Xichen's eyes. That didn't last long though as the younger one chuckled while pulling his in cum covered hand out of his lower garment before speaking in a quite dirty tone.

,,I'm really in no position to do so, or?"

The wild god didn't reply. His gaze was flickering about, breath held in as Jiang Cheng eyed him in slight confusion. Not even many seconds later, the older one of them lost his self-control.. With his darker colored gaze fixed on the other who's expression changed from shock to this dirty kind of aroused and pleased look..

Lan Xichen leaned in to the messy hand, getting a hold of the younger leaders wrist before he ever so lightly, passionately and teasingly went about cleaning up the others mess. In between of his sucks and licks the Jade could see perfectly fine how much the sight aroused his lover, just mentioned ones lips parting and his breathing growing heavy.

,,Do you like my taste?~"

Jiang Cheng had just as clearly as the taller male lost track of reality, his tone so husky and satisfied. The only response he got was a gentle like bite to one of his digits and one of those dirty like smirks only he had seen the prim and proper one wear.

,,If you keep this up I'm gonna lose control as well.."

The younger ones voice grew more seductive, yet desperate like in sound. His breathing heavy in between of his words as he rested his head back against the table, unable to rip his gaze away from the one that replied again with nothing but a tight suck on a digit of his.

Whether it may have been natural reflex, or curiosity due to inexperience,.. sooner or later Jiang Cheng turned his fingers around and acted out movements similiar to thrusting motions with them into the others mouth.

,,We only have two nights and a bit over a day left.. let me hold you already.."

Lan Xichen teased for a moment longer, trying to figure out if the other even realised how desperate he sounded and acted while being so gentle at the same time. Jiang Cheng's expression, just like his own, was full of want and pleasure - the younger one's even more so. It was interesting to see that even though the Lan Sect leader would die to be inside of his lover as well, the other had a way harder time controlling his urge.

,,What would you like to do? We don't have so much time so.."

It had been many years since the wild god saw such a childish frustrated "trying hard to decide for an answer" expression on the younger males face. The last time was probably during one of Jiang Cheng's final tests in the Cloud Recesses, which was quite the adorable flashback that made Lan Xichen's expression grow soft.

,,Fuck.. no one said sex's gonna be that complicated... I don't know.. I don't really mind... I'd like to bend you over and make you lose it like last time.. that was.."

Jiang Cheng sucked in an audible breath, his eyes falling shut as he pressed his clean hand over the bulge in his lower garment. It was quite the sight for the older one of them, having his lover so aroused.

To take some pressure off of the others shoulders Lan Xichen then got up from the ground, fixing his lower garment at least somewhat before holding out his hand to the one that stared up at him in a bit of a confused way. After a moment though the younger one reached out and took the hand that had been offered to help him get up as well,..

However to the Jiang Sect leaders surprise the other let go of him, turned and began to walk to the bedroom.. while undoing his robes. The upper ones were at the time where Lan Xichen disappeared in the bedroom already only getting held up by the crooks of his elbows, arms slightly bend.

Jiang Cheng stood there for a moment longer, staring at the nothingness that was left behind with this stare of a wild animal lurking after its prey. Needless to say that, once he managed to snap out of the memory replaying in his head he - more or less - rushed after the older male. To his surprise, the Jade was already standing there at the lower end of the bed, his upper body now entirely exposed and hands reaching up to release his hair from the hold of the ribbon and hair accessory.

The slightly smaller males hands then began to almost mirror the actions his lover had done so far.. He was a bit trapped in a trance, the sight different from the other day as now Lan Xichen's fair skin was getting embraced by daylight.. each muscle visible as he moved so elegantly, not a noise going out from him, the overly dark hair making such a contrast to the color of his skin,..

Jiang Cheng still hadn't snapped out of his state as he pulled a small flacon out of his sleeve before dropping his upper robes as well. Then he turned, closed the door and as he turned back around he was met with the Lan Sect leaders soft, mildly confused gaze. The wild god was only glancing over his shoulder, clearly waiting and inviting him in.. The tsundere was quite glad that his lover didn't ask out loud what his action about closing the door was about.. What should he have said? That he didn't want anyone to see, if possible not even hear? And that out of some selfish, possessive reason?

Instead of saying a word, the a tad smaller male closed the gap between them. Wrapping his arms around the others waist from behind, they both tensed and let out an audible breath of content as the Jiang Sect leaders hardened length pressed against the Jade so clearly - regardless of being hidden underneath a few layers of lower garment still.


	96. XiCheng 68

Even though it was nowhere near as silent on the outside of the Nie Sect as it was between them, since there was no need for words - To the two it felt as if there was no noise going on, almost as if there was no outside world really.

,,What..?"

Lan Xichen only spoke up in a soft, confused tone underneath his breath after a few minutes of his lover teasing one of his shoulders with pecks. While he had managed to entangle the fingers of his own hand with those of the younger males one hand easily.. the other remained closed, more clenched into a fist.

A few seconds passed before Jiang Cheng turned his hand, opening it to reveal the elegant looking flacon resting in his palm. It was unclear if he had hesitated, or if he simply needed a bit, before he could come back around and his voice didn't make that any clearer as he spoke up in just as much of a low tone.

,,Massage oil.."

,,Mh..?"

The a tad smaller male let out a laugh close to a chuckle that only lasted for a brief moment. How could he expect the other to get it, really? As he began to explain, his tone gradually went back to this calmer and mildly gentle tone only the wild god could tickle out of him.

,,Massage oil,.. I stole it earlier. I don't know if it'll work like I guess.. but I know from experience that it can make some things quite slippery and easier.. It's just herbs and so forth, so it's not poisonous anyway.."

Honestly, it was a shame that the younger one wasn't able to witness the Lan Sect leaders expression go from shock, to realisation, to more shock, and so forth with each new bit of information. At the end he almost whispered in a matching tone while slightly turning his head back, only to be greeted by Jiang Cheng's "bedroom eyes" and smirk.

,,Oh.. so you planned to-"

The one in the purple lower garment cut the others speech short with lightly shaking his head, then he chuckled as his lover raised a brow in clear suspicion. His tone nonchalant, amused and dirty at the same time as he spoke while watching the prim and proper Jade's face go red as anything.

,,That here? When I stole that, I didn't plan that.. I mean, after I let myself get hit I hoped for something but.. I honestly really just planned to get myself off a few times. I already woke up with a tent because of quite the dirty dreams and even had to cancel breakfast because seeing you in the morning really didn't help so.."

,,Wanyin, please.."

,,Mh?~ What's wrong?~"

Lan Xichen blew some air into his cheeks, making his face look a little more round as he tried to hold back some anger from being so obviously teased. His tone at first had been close to a begging for the other to stop, at the end Jiang Cheng only looked at him with his brows raised, feigning innocence and ignorance at the same time.

,,Okay.. I'll stop teasing if you get undressed and bend over..~"

,,.......What else..?"

There was something about the way the one born in Yunmeng had looked and paused at the end that got the wild god to turn some further and eye the other up and down, in pure suspicion this time. To his shock, Jiang Cheng leaned in to his ear and whispered in such a intoxicating, seductive manner with even less shame left.

,,I would really like to see you prepare yourself because you want it that badly, Huan..~"

With how the taller males jaw dropped and how his complexion paled, just to go an even brighter shade of red afterwards without him moving an inch, or saying a word.. Jiang Cheng actually ended up lifting his free hand to close the others mouth before waving it in front of his face in a "Earth to Huan" kind of way - as he still got no response, the younger one chuckled before letting go of the Jade entirely and sitting down at the lower end of the bed.

,,One day maybe.. I didn't expect you to anyway, in all honesty."

If someone would see how the wild god stumbled backwards and let himself sink down on the bed beside the other they more than likely would've thought some sort of tragic confession of cheating or something similar to that had just happened.

,,Ey, you asked yourself. If you keep acting like that I might need to call for help because I think you're about to drop dead to the ground."

As hard as he tried, by this point it seemed so possible that Jiang Cheng couldn't even properly bring his words across as a joke.

,,Just.. Just out of curiousity.. how many of the things you have in mind would you.. how many would you do yourself, or let me do to you?"

Lan Xichen spoke up after around a minute, pausing and clearing his throat in between - yet his voice sounded steady in a way still. The one born in Yunmeng in turn raised his brows and looked at the closed door as he replied in all seriousness.

,,The last thing I said.. I don't know if I'd do it now either.. Everything else.. I think it depends on the mood and all of that.."

As Jiang Cheng glanced over he could see the older male nod slowly a few too many times.

,,Do you want it still?"

The smaller sect leader turned slightly, to his surprise the wild god looked at him with a raised brow.. he seemed irritated or confused, which was also audible as he spoke in a semi-low tone.

,,It's just your complete openness that amazes me and shocks me time and time again, A-Cheng.."

,,Is it that, or that I say it to you?"

Another moment of silence spread between them as Lan Xichen blinked in confusion.

,,Well, honestly.. Looking back, the only person that is used to my foul language and character for a longer period of time than Jin Ling is you.. so is it that I can just say those things.. that I can say those things while talking to a guy.. or that I'm able to imagine all those things with you?"

Until around the middle of the younger leaders speech the Jade had kept his gaze on him, after that though he looked away.. at the ground, clearly they both knew the answer yet neither said it out loud. It was just another one of those things - or traits - where they were so terribly alike. How could someone possibly desire them with all their flaws?


	97. XiCheng 69

The younger one spaced out a little, unable to stop a voice inside of his head from telling him that they were quite the pathetic duo.. He only snapped back out of it as he felt a touch on his arm before already finding himself standing. Lan Xichen had pulled him up on his feet, the tsundere blinked as he tilted his head.. the older male didn't say a word though, he waited a moment before closing the gap between them, tilting his head to the opposite side to Jiang Cheng's.

For quite a few seconds, maybe even a minute, Lan Xichen let the tension build and stares linger. Neither of them really dared to breath, as they then in sync lifted each one of their hands. The Jade's found its way to the younger leaders injured cheek, while a mere second later Jiang Cheng's hand got a hold of the elders nape. With his fingers half entangled in this almost endlessly long, black hair of the Lan Sect leader, the younger one couldn't help that really not long after he pulled the other in and let their lips meet.

The softness of the kiss didn't remain for long before they started another one of those passionate and deep tongue tango's. Every so often in between either catched the other taking a little glance and after a while Jiang Cheng's hand disappeared from the back of his lovers neck, sliding further down only to place a little slap on the finely toned behind.

It wasn't the best of ideas Jiang Cheng had so far.. within a second he let out a pained groan, the taller male in turn a surprised noise before the other spoke up in a somewhat pained "what the" kind of tone.

,,Why did you bite my tongue?!"

,,I'm sorry.."

Lan Xichen sounded once again quite panicked, voice full of guilt and worry as he got a hold of his lovers cheeks only to peck his lips a few times. The situation was so weird and escalated out of nowhere that the smaller male was torn between laughing and frozen in place.. at the end he did laugh, a little at least.

,,Well, forget it. It was my fault.. I didn't know slapping your ass would turn you into a prone to bite pup though.."

The prone to bite pup went bright red in the face, rather gently but with some strength still slapping the others ass in some sort of revenge. Lan Xichen's brows were furrowed, a pout playing on his lips.. and to his shock the younger leader only replied with a raised brow, smug expression and such a dirty smirk forming on his lips. Before the Jade could fight back any further though, he tensed slightly, a shiver running down his spine as his gaze flickered back and forther between fixed on Jiang Cheng and a spot at a wall beside them.

The Jiang Sect leader had slid his hand in the back of his lovers lower garment, cupping a cheek of the elders ass with it as he squeezed it while staring into the darker colored eyes of the other. He was still holding the massage oil in his other hand, yet he wasn't quite done with the teasing. It turned into such a pleasurable sight as Lan Xichen's eyes fell shut, lips trembling lightly as he clearly struggled to refrain from parting his legs some further when Jiang Cheng's digit trailed between his cheeks to barely tease his so private spot.

,,Look how much your body remembers, Huan..~"

Jiang Cheng whispered so seductively against the others neck that he had leaned in to, his own body brimming with want. It wasn't only the Jade's body, they both remembered so deeply inside and out that it grew quite unbearable quick. After a minute or a bit more the younger one then let his hand trail back up the others back, pulling him closer as he stood more upright again. Neither of them could keep their eyes entirely open, neither of them looked any less aroused and lovesick; whether they realised or not.

,,How do you want me to hold you..?~"

The taller one of them went a little redder in the face as he looked at his lover who was smirking at him. Jiang Cheng seemed to misunderstand, once again, as the Lan Sect leader didn't speak up simply because he couldn't decide.

,,Do you want to let go.. or would you rather cling to me.. I don't mind, I honestly just really want to embrace you by now..~"

,,I don't care.."

,,Mh?"

Jiang Cheng raised a brow, he didn't quite know what to make of the others statement that had been so low in volume and so weak and desperate in sound. The Jade however couldn't say more while looking at his lover though, turning his head somewhat, his left hand rose to tug a few strands of hair behind his ear as he spoke.

,,I feel the same way as you do, Wanyin,.. that's why I said I don't care.."

It was the first time that the wild god was sure that the other didn't notice his own reactions at all. Jiang Cheng had closed the gap between them, hands placed on the taller leaders sides. Then he put a little peck on Lan Xichen's collarbone. As their eyes met, the expression of the one born in Yunmeng was so gentle, he looked so young and as if he had just been gifted something so important.. Lan Xichen in turn could feel his own expression grow soft, his smile for once in many years so true and heartfelt.

,,I left quite a few marks on your body.. I can still see them so clearly.."

,,Mmh.. I don't mind that, Wanyin."

,,I want to make you let go like last time.."

,,I..... It felt..."

,,I know.. don't worry, I know.... Do you trust me, Huan..?"

,,I do."

,,I don't know if I'll be able to stop after one time though.."

,,Neither am I sure that I would want that.."

Jiang Cheng who had spend the last few moments of them talking in their sweet, seductive little whisper like tones with pecking his way up and down the Jade's collarbone area.. At the last sentence of Lan Xichen though he chuckled and looked up before taking a step back. In his lighter colored gaze flickers of mischief could be spotted and a smirk twitching around the corners of his lips.


	98. XiCheng 70

It was more than likely because Lan Xichen knew what would come next that he tilted his head, his fingers still playing with a strand of his endlessly long, pitch black hair. His expression so soft, gentle and sweet just as much as full of longing.

,,Alright then.. Undress and bend over the way you enjoyed yourself so much last time..~"

The Jade hadn't needed to hear those words, he knew what to do.. but hearing it.. it made him feel something he couldn't quite figure out inside. After a brief moment he then turned, facing the lower end of the bed he - as gracefully as ever - pulled down his lower garment; exposing his still hard as a rock length. It went so terribly against his rules what he did next as he proceeded to kneel on the bed, letting his hands slide down to only then get rid of his shoes and lower garment before letting both drop to the ground.

Jiang Cheng was meanwhile trying hard to refrain from both touching himself or just pouncing on his lover.. The sight made both his heart and aching member throb so painfully, his mouth watering as the grip around the flacon with the massage oil in it tightened and loosened. His situation only grew worse as he watched how the taller one crawled further up on the bed, sitting seiza style style for a moment Lan Xichen moved all of his hair over one of his shoulders before then - finally - taking in the bend over position they both favoured so much.

The younger male closed the gap between himself and the other rather slowly, even though he couldn't waste much time with just taking the view in. However, after getting rid of his own shoes and lower garment he did take some time to cherish the unwrapped Jades body. Laying the flacon beside them, Jiang Cheng leaned over his lover - the movements still a bit clumsy and foreign. And while one of his hands teasingly caressed one of Lan Xichen's hardening nubs, he slowly but just as eager- as passionately teased his way with his mouth around the others back.

Jiang Cheng ignored the voice inside of his mind that tried to tell him he shouldn't waste their time like that, that he shouldn't forget the situation they were in currently.. He deliberately decided to ignore it though because: How could it be a waste of their time to hear the others breathing change, feel the Jade's muscles slowly relax, have them both get lost more and more?

,,Relax.. If you don't like something, say it."

A few minutes had passed where the younger Sect leader had, this time less accidentally, left a few love bites all the way down on the wild god's back. It was so noticeable yet again that they were honestly feeling themselves. It didn't matter who they were anymore, or what they were born as.. As Jiang Cheng spoke his tone made it clear that it was an order, he had reached the tailbone area of the older ones back and sat up to reach for the flacon. It didn't even surprise him that Lan Xichen only responded with a melodic little hum, unwilling to get himself ripped out of his state.

From there on everything proceeded like it had done the other night.. Just that to the a tad smaller males surprise it already went a bit more easily to let his digits sink in. As guessed, or hoped, the effect of the massage oil also seemed to work better than what they had used previously as lube.. Another surprise for Jiang Cheng was that his lover seemed to be even more needy than the other night, not that he minded it or felt it any less.. it just didn't make anything more bearable to have Lan Xichen press his ass against his fingers in clear want for more while he was nowhere nearly enough prepared for that.

,,Wanyin.. do it already.."

,,No."

Jiang Cheng had just so inserted his third digit as the other spoke up in his trembling, weak yet rough neko voice. There was actually some frustration audible, yet somehow the one born in Yunmeng managed to make his refusal sound serious while his length send a painful twitch through his system as punishment for it.

,,Yes."

,,What's with you?! Are you that horny that you lost your senses now?"

Even though the younger one already spoke in pure disbelief his jaw dropped entirely then as the other looked over his shoulder, the smirk playing on his lips and vibe in his eyes so different from what Lan Xichen usually stood for.

,,I am. Ever since yesterday.. I think of almost nothing but.. holding you down,.. teaching you a few things with nothing but my body... Why else would I find relief so soon.. or react this way... Why else would I tell you to take action already.. before I will do so myself, Wanyin..?~"

Jiang Cheng stopped midway in one of the thrusting motions with his digits, he could neither believe his eyes nor ears.. Even less as Lan Xichen chuckled before turning his head back around. It took a few moments for it to really make click in the younger males mind that the Jade had more than likely thrown him out the other day because he wished to hold him down and fuck him hard. That he had made the other so needy for it with his actions and words that Lan Xichen needed to find more relief somehow to refrain from keeping them locked in this room right now for who knew how long even.

,,Wanyin."

Lan Xichen spoke up again, his voice more stable.. almost at the point of sounding like a warning. For a few seconds longer the Jiang Sect leader hesitated, making the desire in the other grow stronger as within himself the younger one of them couldn't help but feel the same.. just that it was the desire he didn't want to admit for getting to know how that would be. The desire to get to know another side of the wild god that no one had seen or felt so far.


	99. XiCheng 71

,,Alright.. If chance may will.. I'll take whatever you have to throw at me, at some point."

The one born in Yunmeng had pulled out his digit before saying those few words in a bit of a defeated, yet serious like tone.. He couldn't quite understand though why the wild god ended up chuckling as soon as his statement was said out loud at this point in time.

,,Spread your legs a little further and try to relax.."

Again, Lan Xichen only let out a melodic almost nonchalant little hum before doing as told. Jiang Cheng in turn was pouring quite a bit of the oil on his hand, his eyes falling shut as he stroked his length to lube himself up. The younger male wasn't too comfortable with the idea, yet he regardless went between his lovers legs and positioned himself.

Needless to say that when Jiang Cheng went about easing his tip in while letting out a heavy breath.. the Jade tensed while the current giver gritted his teeth. The sensation for one was so full, for the other so tight that it was equally as painful as intoxicating for the both of them. It was just as much of a double edged sword to fight against the urge to move with the knowledge that it could end badly if either would do so.

At the end it took quite a few minutes until the one born in Yunmeng had managed to ease himself in, to the point where he was about to scold the other because if they would've gone about it differently everything would've actually gone so much quicker. However, as he opened his eyes his initial glare vanished, his over all expression softened as he looked at the wild god that was trembling already. Jiang Cheng spoke up a moment later, his tone a bit tense as the thought had crossed his mind again about how hard it must be for the Lan Sect leader to let himself be seen and turned this way.

,,Are you alright?"

Lan Xichen couldn't reply in an instant, hiding his face in the crook of his elbow before he looked up and nodded. Once he spoke up, his voice was full of such honest relief, shaky yet again weirdly satisfied.

,,I am.. I was just so impatient..."

Jiang Cheng rolled his eyes, straightening himself up a little he lifted his hand to push some hair out of his face before replying in a tone quite similar to his usual one.

,,No need to be embarrassed. If I could I'd have just thrusted in, not that either of us is experienced enough for that yet.."

,,Are you harder than before or is it the position..?"

,,What the-... Huan?!"

The younger one had been so baffled and shocked by this out of nowhere comment of his lover that he blurted his words out in a matching tone while semi-mildly placing a slap on the others ass. To his further surprise Lan Xichen moaned, the already tight embrace around his length tightening rhythmically causing the Jiang Sect leader to take in a sharp, audible breath.

,,Where the heck did that come from?!"

,,.. I... I didn't notice I said that out loud.. I'm sorry.."

,,I hope for you that you are!"

,,It was a compliment.. a compliment, I promise Wanyin.."

Jiang Cheng only stopped being upset after the second time where Lan Xichen had replied in his ashamed and guilty tone. Shaking his head the a tad smaller one remained silent as he put his hands on the others hips.

,,What kind of a compliment's that supposed to be?"

,,..... you're just... deeper.."

Even though Lan Xichen spoke up with hesitation, the younger male now finally calmed down again as he let out a questioning hum. In fact, Jiang Cheng wasn't even sure how much his "condition" had differed from all the alcohol yet having a possible immense change being pointed out had left him quite flustered.

,,Anyway.. relax.."

The one born in Yunmeng said after a few more seconds, not that either of them needed to relax any further after their little moment. Closing his eyes, Jiang Cheng took and let out a last heavy breath before he went about clumsily making the first few thrusting motions in the new position. They both moaned, tensed and their hands got a hold of different things.. yet looking back at the scene one day when he was more experienced Jiang Cheng wouldn't be able to look the elder in the eyes due to embarrassment from how bad he really was.

A few minutes needed to pass before they both had adjusted their positions so that everything truly fit. As after a while the wild god's tight cage had given in as well, things quickly began to grow.. intense. The sober Jiang Cheng was a little less loud, letting out huffs and groans with an occasional low curse thrown in. His hands were kneading the Jade's behind and waist as he began to pick up the pace and went more daring with his thrusts over all. Maybe exactly because the Lan Sect leader couldn't take a look at him it was so easy for the smaller one of them to stare at his trembling and moving body so shamelessly.

The only thing that was a bit different about Lan Xichen however was that he was back at trying to hold his moans in.. It was hard to say though whether that was because he had gone through some sort of mental reset or because it was in the middle of the day where anyone could hear them or come in. Apart from that, the only thing that remained steady about him were his hips, soon into their first round.. his upper body gave in quick, going back and forth between trying to prop himself up and laying down - or more half collapsing. He was shivering and shaking as his body rocked back and forth in sync with his lovers more eager and passionate like getting motions.


	100. XiCheng 72

As a little while later the wild god had more or less accepted his fate of his upper body listening to his wishes and commands less and less and layed down.. Jiang Cheng took the oppurtunity to lean over him, the shift in position as he put his arms on either side of the other making his leaking length go even deeper. Neither of them moaned any less sinfully or silently as that happened. The younger one then leaned his forehead against his lovers back, breathing heavily as he barely pulled his hips back and concentrated more on pushing his length as deeply inside the other as possible - with little, but for sure some strength.

The two sect leaders pleasured noises grew a little louder from there on. At some point Jiang Cheng lifted his head, his body moving by then on its own as he began to place a few pecks on the Jade's back - or more between his shoulder blades. It was each and every time somewhat surprising, yet not at the same time, for the older one of the two of them that it was only during such intimate moments that Jiang Cheng was able to show the side of his that his fate in upbringing destorted.

,,A-Cheng.."

The one born in Yunmeng tensed due to how Lan Xichen had moaned his name.. so weakly, yet strongly all at once. A outcry full of pleasure, no shame or restraint left. However, after the brief tension vanished he mumbled under his heavy breath in a bit of a bratty tone.

,,If you want something.. from me.. use my actual name.."

,,Wanyin.."

,,Fuck.."

Jiang Cheng had expected it to hit, but it hit him so much deeper than expected. He could actually feel his knot tighten, a rush go through him that was between adrenaline and heat.. such a weird sensation that made his body feel all tingly on the inside. His curse had been pressed out, one hand tugging on the sheets as the other wrapped around his seniors waist. The wild god in turn had moaned as well, the thrusts teasing his sweet spot by then so perfectly.

,,What..?"

Just like the younger male, Lan Xichen needed a few moments before he could moan more than say anything further. His body truly didn't want to obey his wishes any longer, his mind reacting to whatever the other asked of him.

,,I.. It feels so good.. I'm.."

The Jade's speech was cut short as Jiang Cheng naturally, almost instantly, moved. Feeling the hand wrap around his twitching and throbbing length all Lan Xichen could do still was to let himself fall and let out a choked moan. Even though the stroking motions over his length and the thrusting ones against his sweet spot were nowhere near in sync, he couldn't have cared any less. Everything Jiang Cheng did was a little rough, the grip a bit tight, the thrusts a tad hard,.. yet nothing truly brought discomfort or pain. And regardless of his mind being too clouded from lust, there was a part inside of Lan Xichen that got driven so much closer by the fact that from all those Jiang Cheng had met,.. Not a soul would be treated with so little control, yet so much care - other than him, not in this way, not in any other.

A few embarrassingly short minutes later the invisible little knots of the two men then had tightened, ready to rip apart. Jiang Cheng was by then far too lost in all the sensations to give a damn about anything, which wasn't any different for Lan Xichen.. And after a last wave of tension took them over, they moaned one another's given name so sinfully and a little too loudly as they drove over the edge.

If it wouldn't be for natural reflexes, the younger one of them would've terribly failed at keeping the thrusts and the stroking motions going all at once for them both to find the first relief where their bodies were combined.. However, they were both such panting messes that while Lan Xichen more or less collapsed on the bed, Jiang Cheng was hovering above him propped up on his hands. Neither could say a word for a few minutes,.. at the end it was even the smaller sect leader that broke the silence first. His tone rough and still out of breath as he stroked his gone wild hair out of his face; only for it to fall back.

,,Well.. I actually planned to pull out so you don't have to walk around with this mess leaking out of you all day... Guess my self control is too shit.. Cut that, it's so shit I don't even want to let go of you right now.."

,,Then don't."

Jiang Cheng's chuckle was cut short as the wild god spoke up so seriously in his deep, after climax tone pretty much instantly after the other had said his last word. The younger male had gone back to try and brush his hair out of his face, stopping halfway in the movement as he felt his still tightly wrapped up length twitch inside of his lover.

,,I don't think we should."

The a tad smaller one said in a bit of a defeated tone as he pulled his hips back so his length would slide out of the other. To his astonishment however, while sitting up and running his hands over his face.. the Lan Sect leader turned on his back. The wild god's face was red, eyes so gentle and soft with tears of pleasure making them shimmer so stunningly in the still brought daylight.. As if that wasn't enough to make a man that had just recently lost his first time lose his mind - Lan Xichen smiled, so sweetly, his legs wrapping around the younger leaders waist rather loosely as his arms extended in such a welcoming, almost aching to get comforted and held manner.

For a moment Jiang Cheng froze, his right arm holding the aching spot on the back of his head, expression impossible to read. Regardless of his hesitation however, nothing about Lan Xichen changed.. and even though the one born in Yunmeng knew that he was anything but the gentle type the other needed... He knew one thing more than that and that was that if at this point he would not react, his lover would scatter to pieces like a house made of glass that someone threw a stone against with full force. Jiang Cheng knew he wasn't even nice, that he wasn't the overly gentle type someone as fragile as Lan Xichen needed.. yet who was he to turn down someone who ached for the same things as he did himself? Who was he to turn his back on another person that put so much trust and faith in him like he had once done to Wei Wuxian? Who was he, one of the most admired yet looked down upon sect leaders, to turn down Lan Xichen, the broken and torn Jade of the Lan's, that had gotten so many cracks already from people letting his fragile soul fall?


	101. XiCheng 73

Honestly, he had shown so many expressions he wasn't used to making anymore and laughed so much that as he tilted his head.. Well, as Jiang Cheng's expression softened entirely, and the smile that spread on his lips this crooked thing between a smirk and a smile - on one side too low on the other too high to really be either - he could slowly start to feel his face ache. Neither of them minded that it was so overly visible, or noticeable, that the Jiang Sect leader had forgotten how to really smile a heartfelt one.

Letting out a chuckle that made his shoulders move, the one born in Yunmeng then shook his head in this soft "You're going to be the death of me" amused manner. After that, for the Jade it felt like such a long amount of time while only seconds had passed, Jiang Cheng then bend over. The younger one could barely brush his lips against Lan Xichen's once before he was already trapped from both arms and legs of the other in a loose yet tight manners.

,,How am I supposed to move this way, mh?~ Tell me, Huan.."

Jiang Cheng whispered, unable to even keep up a scolding tone as he sounded so gentle and amused at the end.. The Lan Sect leader however simply smiled at him, his expression so full of content and warmth as he spoke up in a bit of a luring, teasing tone that was like his lovers barely anything above a whisper.

,,Kiss me and I might let you..~"

,,You might?"

,,I might.~"

The a tad smaller male raised a brow, looking a bit more like himself but nowhere near fully. As Lan Xichen kept talking the same way, it didn't even matter to him that the fingers of his lover that were playing with a few gone loose strands of his hair made the wound on the back of his head ache.. For a bit longer Jiang Cheng kept teasing though, neither of them aware of how they were behaving.

,,Isn't that the wrong strategy if you take into account that I had already retreated in defeat?"

,,You're here again though.. so I will not accept the truce."

Jiang Cheng raised his brows again before shrugging and slighty turning his head away - acting like he didn't care and was hard to get.. Compared to the weapons the wild god had though, none of those the younger male had were anything because a moment later Jiang Cheng tensed in surprise. Turning his head back around he could just so see how Lan Xichen rested his head back on the bed after having placed a peck on his lovers wounded cheek.

,,You cheeky little thing.."

The younger one said after a moment in an acted upset like tone, as he tried to free himself though neither the Jade's arms nor legs gave in even the tiniest amount. After that however Jiang Cheng paused, it must've been quite visible that he got something in his mind since Lan Xichen spoke up in a tone so soft and gentle with bits of worry lingering.

,,What is wrong, Wanyin?"

,,Mh..? Oh.. It's nothing. I only now realised that I just got undressed earlier without even thinking about it."

At first the younger leaders eyes had widened as he snapped out of his train of thought, after his trying to sound nonchalant statement it was the wild god's turn to widen his eyes - out of realisation though, before his expression softened even further.

,,And..?"

,,Since over a decade I'm focusing on no one realising.. It's in the middle of the day, yet I-"

,,Wanyin.. You did it so easily because it is natural.. If someone would see us right now, your scars would be the last thing anyone would talk about for at least a decade.."

Jiang Cheng paused twice, once as his speech got cut off by his lovers gentle and reassuring interruption, the second time after just mentioned ones speech was over. He tried not to make it too noticeable, but with how many layers of his onion skin like protection had already been peeled off without him taking note of it.. Let's just say it was rather evident in many ways that he was at least mildly beating himself up for his mishap - which he then also made just as mildly audible with his next lot of words and the tone in which he said them.

,,They could've only seen me as well. I shouldn't grow reckless now and make sure such thing won't turn into a habit."

,,Wanyin.. If anything shall happen because of what we are doing, I will be the first to come and help you."

The Jiang Sect leader let out a barely audible chuckle at that, saying clearly more to himself afterwards in a barely audible tone.

,,You kind of always did."

,,Mh?"

,,Nothing.. You pecked the scratch just now, are you trying to make it heal?~"

Lan Xichen noticed that his lover had to slightly switch the topic.. He didn't know however that Jiang Cheng wasn't quite ready yet to go through the entire "Everyone is always helping me, alone I'm actually completely useless and would've died so and so long ago" talk at this point in time. For the first time since they knew one another though, the Lan Sect leader rolled his eyes at the bad attempt at a tease before he replied in the same gentle and soft tone from before while putting more weight, or meaning, into his words.

,,I would not go against your wish to keep it, even if it wouldn't suit you as much and hold as much meaning as it does for you.. When it comes to all your other scars however, if it may lesson the weight on your shoulders, I would as I said before be more than willing to help you find a way to at least lesson their severity. However, Wanyin.. I meant what I have said before. I accept you the way you are. Those scars, while they may make visible who you are to an extent, they do not define you nor are they all there is to you. They are a part of you, like your name, your sect,.. you decide for yourself if you let them strengthen you or weigh you down.. just like how much meaning you will let them have in your life or how much control over it, which position and rank in your list of priorities they may have.."


	102. XiCheng 74

Jiang Cheng let out a soft little breath, only staring down at the Jade with that soft expression of his that was nowhere near as gentle as the others still. Even though he didn't say a word, as he leaned down, brushed his lips against his lovers, just so barely, before letting them meet.. Lan Xichen could understand the language that was spoken while no words were said out loud. The kiss was nothing the Jiang Sect leader had lead so far. It was so gentle and slow, with no tongue involved, a clear "thank you" kind of gesture.

Even as after minutes they both tilted their heads a little further to the side, letting their lips part so their tongues could dance along and tastes combine it remained this way. The Jades fingers were still playing with the few loose strands of the younger males hair, their eyes closed as neither of them moved any further. They only let their bodies speak in such a intimate, exposed moment that went quite a bit deeper than sex alone.

As sooner or later Jiang Cheng broke the kiss he was getting trapped within the others spell again.. The Jade was staring up at him, everything about him emitting light and gentleness and l-...

,,Mmh~"

Before the younger one could finish the thought that could've brought the scenes entirety possibly to an abrupt hold, a smirk formed on his lips as he let out a soft contented noise that wasn't quite a moan. He hadn't realised that Lan Xichen had made a hand disappear in the space between their bodies, which was only just so available for the Jiang Sect leader to not entirely lay on the other. The a tad smaller male raised a brow as the touch that was so soft, clearly between a tease and a lure, over his length continued, speaking in an acted grumpy yet honestly more seductive and rough sounding tone. The Jade looked at him so innocently in contrast to his not so innocent actions that it was baffling him.

,,What do you think you're doing there, Huan?"

Lan Xichen then spoke in this innocent as anything, sweet tone as he run the tips of his fingers over his lovers shaft,.. noticing, of course, that even though the one born in Yunmeng managed to keep his expression straight, the muscles in his body tensed almost too faintly for a normal person to take note of it.

,,I just wanted to see if you may have retired by now, Wanyin~"

,,If I have what?! You.."

Regardless of no trucks existing in their universe, Jiang Cheng was so hit by one that he couldn't even properly fight back and only speak up in complete disbelief. He wasn't used at all to someone coming at him with such a provocative kind of a tease and that showed so clearly on his face.. yet to pour another bucket of ice cold water over his bright red head the Lan Sect leader didn't stop at all.

,,Well, a little you have.."

At some point as Lan Xichen watched his lovers mouth open and close, clearly at a loss of words, his expression was almost about to crumble apart due to barely being able to hold back his fit of laughter any longer.. However, the impulsive Jiang Cheng only dug his grave deeper as he shoved his own hand in between of them while speaking in such a upset "I'm gonna win" kind of tone..

,,As if you didn't-"

The younger males so desperate attempt at saving face and regaining his crumbled pieces of pride were all for naught as he somewhat roughly got a hold of the wild god's length. Jiang Cheng's expression immediately froze, staring at the taller one as his soul visibly left his body - only to see his lover raise his brows in a silent "Mh? What were you about to say" manner.

,,Y-You.. You're just so damn easy to please, that's all.."

Jiang Cheng was merely able to stutter those few words, sounding so much like his nephew as he did,.. before he then turned his head away, both his tone and expression had given away that deep down inside he knew it was a stretch.. A terrible excuse, if it was even plausible to refer to his words as such.

The wild god's initial pout caused by the hand around his member disappearing did so as well as he now got a glimpse of how the sober "oh so tough" Jiang Sect leader was when he was as deeply embarrassed. And it was so evident that Jiang Cheng was embarrassed, his face - even barely visible due to his hair covering it mostly - was taken over by such a deep, bright shade of red. The younger leaders muscles tense and hands clenching and loosening their grip on the sheets. What the Jade sadly wasn't able to see though was that Jiang Cheng was even chewing on his lower lip so nervously, eyes clenched shut; it was just another tiny something he could beat himself up with mentally.

As much as he had felt like it, Lan Xichen couldn't laugh any longer. His expression went all soft again, such a lovesick like look playing on his angelic features. The process of falling for one another was such a constant, obvious companion of theirs, yet neither wanted, or dared to notice - or maybe they simply just didn't. Without saying a word at first, the Lan Sect leader then wrapped his hand around his lovers length that was only a little less hard than before. His stroking motions gentle and slow, treating the younger ones so private, fragile part as if it was the most precious of things without taking his eyes away from the other.

After the small incident however the tsundere turned out to be a rather hard nut to crack.. He neither turned his head back around, nor did he really react to the teasing of the taller male. In the end, he even spoke up in this self-mocking and sarcastic tone that made the wild god sigh.

,,Isn't that such a pain for you? Weren't you all flustered and upset when I tried to get you up earlier? I'm so deeply sorry to cause you such discomfort, Huan."


	103. XiCheng 75

,,You're not."

It was only as the Jade spoke in still a gentle, yet quite serious tone, that he managed to get the younger one to turn his head back around. Jiang Cheng's expression showed that he was both confused and irritated. Unsure whether he should believe the Lan Sect leader or not, he spoke up himself again in the same tone still but with suspicion lingering audibly.

,,I'm not what?"

,,You're not causing me any discomfort, Wanyin. When I stopped you earlier.. it was because I wanted to avoid you feeling uncomfortable from me being so.. unprepared, shall we say. I didn't mean for my tease to make you think or feel a bad way, I.. I honestly just.... want to sleep with you one more time.."

,,Oh.."

As dumbfounded as the one born in Yunmeng looked, the older males face lit up just as much as he let out a little laugh that was the epitome of this falling head over heels unsaid "Idiot" a girl would usually do. Once the laugh had subsided, while Jiang Cheng was still staring at him with his little upset frown, Lan Xichen then said a luring, teasing little phrase that made his lover glare at him - quite cutely, if the Jade would have a say.

,,Now.. are you going to continue playing hard to get, or..?~"

Jiang Cheng couldn't quite process all the small things that had happened so far.. which was probably the only reason why everything could run so smoothly until then: The Lan Sect leader simply knew how to keep his mind too pre-occupied to trail off to negativity, rage and so forth.. Which he then did again as the younger one rolled his eyes, only for them to widen a moment later as he was stunned by the sight of the Jades lips lift on one side into a smirk.. before this time directly winking at him.

,,I don't know.. maybe I shouldn't give you a treat after behaving as badly as you did the past minutes.."

Regardless of such a big, playful pout appearing on his fair colored face, Lan Xichen had felt the other twitch within the hold of his hand at the same time as he had winked. The words Jiang Cheng said were due to that already not quite hitting as deep as the younger one had hoped for.

,,Wanyin.. please.."

As guessed, once he used a bit of a weaker, trembling and mildly begging tone while looking up at his younger lover.. The Jiang Sect leaders brow twitched, and for sure not only that part of his body,.. yet a mere second later Jiang Cheng raised both of his brows, trying to act everything out a bit longer - clearly to see how far he could go, or how far he could make the other go. Jiang Cheng then spoke while a smirk played on his lips, his tone a little deeper, luring the one that was actually luring him in with this top tone of his.

,,What do you want?"

,,Hold me.."

The younger leaders eyes widened in surprise, his lovers reply had come almost instantly. He really couldn't know that already as he talked about "treats" and all of that that Lan Xichen had mentally prepared to use this phrase. Jiang Cheng swallowed, so much honest want had been audible in the wild god's tone as his entirety turned back into this fragile, overly handsome man. Somewhere in the back of his head, a faint voice full of disbelief was questioning how he, Jiang Cheng, could overlook and resist the temptation that Lan Xichen was for so long.

After a moment Jiang Cheng then leaned in, acting as if he was about to let their lips meet only to let the other whine in frustation as he ended up leaning in to his lovers ear instead - whispering so low and gentle, not even taking note of it, the smirk playing on his lips audible as he spoke.

,,Then would you let me move already, Huan?~"

Lan Xichen debated for a moment, even though he wanted more in a few ways he was rather content with how they were right now as well.. with him stroking the younger ones since his mild begging back to rock hard erection.

,,Mmh.. Alright~"

The Jade then pulled his hands away, legs bend on the sheets as he stared at the younger leader that sat up between his legs while rolling his almond colored eyes. Like the other day - and night - the Jiang Sect leader then tilted his head to the side, a little back as well, as he reached for the massage oil flacon. It truly was a difference to sleep with someone in the faint, flickering light of candles at sundown and throughout the night, versus right now in brought daylight where everything was so much clearer to see.

Letting a bit of the oil drip on his hand, Jiang Cheng let his hand disappear between his lovers legs. The latter sucked in a soft breath as a shiver took him over when the digits lubed him up and one of them spread his aching, still tight muscles. It was once more a sight Lan Xichen wouldn't be able to forget, or get out of his head,.. How a look of pure proudness and being satisfied with oneself spread across the tsunderes face as he felt his lust inside of the Lan Sect leader. Usually, the Jade would've probably at least went red in the face.. but somehow, something about that look made him swallow instead - this strange vibe of manliness, paired with the clear possessiveness behind it.

Jiang Cheng wasn't done with serving equally as breathtaking as arousing sights yet though.. Like before their first time, after making sure the Jade was well prepared, he pulled his digits out and poured another bit of oil on his hand. At this point the wild god twitched, knowing what was about to happen next which was this little show of the younger sect leader rubbing over his length while smirking and staring into his eyes - knowing fully well that Lan Xichen would be unable to tear his gaze away. It wouldn't be a lie to say that regardless of him not understanding what Jiang Cheng gained from doing that, he gained a lot from watching it happen for sure.


	104. XiCheng 76

Lan Xichen had honestly expected his lover to ask him something completely shameless again before making another move, just to make him all flustered.. To his surprise however the a tad smaller male remained completely silent as he stopped the teasing after around a minute, leaning back over the wild god only to brush their lips together. Neither of them closed their eyes fully, even as their lips had already met.. and like earlier, Jiang Cheng wasn't leading anything in what the Lan Sect leader believed to be his "routine". The kiss was yet again gentle, slow, deep even before their tongues were involved..

The younger male didn't even break it as he shifted his weight a little, letting his hand direct his length to his lovers entrance. Only when he pushed himself in, so slowly and gently, did he lift his head enough to be able to take a good look at Lan Xichen's face. The wild god's eyes fell shut, his arms and legs automatically wrapping back around him as his head fell back and lips parted to let out the lowest, most pleasured of sounds. Jiang Cheng then paused, letting them both accustom to it all again. A self-sufficient smirk playing on the corner of his lips that didn't quite match the gentleness in his eyes. He had only let out a barely audible curse as he felt himself get sucked in from his lovers body.

,,Satisfied now?~"

Jiang Cheng then asked after a few seconds, once the taller ones body had relaxed completely underneath him.. his tone dirty, yet again full of gentleness he might or might not have taken note of. The wild god then let out a noise of pure comfort and relief, his cheeks tinting in a light shade of pink as it reached his own ears and.. as he opened his eyes to be met by the tsunderes intense stare he could only smile an overly shy one.

,,Quite..~"

,,Just quite? Alright, I get it.. I'll only let you out of this room once you're fully satisfied."

The tsundere had raised a brow, then shook his head before saying his few words in a acted speechless, defeated tone. Lan Xichen's reaction to that statement was, a twitch of his length that made his muscles tighten around his lovers member as well - There was a voice in the back of his head trying to remind him of all the reasons why he should deny the offer, but.. the heart wants what it wants, after all.

While Lan Xichen wasn't overly surprised about the younger male then leaning back in to his lips to re-start the formerly broken kiss,.. what surprised him was how Jiang Cheng went about embracing him. Even after several minutes, where they both moaned ever so softly into one another's mouths, the thrusts were slow, gentle. It wasn't "like Jiang Cheng", it was clearly his beloved way of making love to the younger sect leader, including his favourite all the way motions.

Everything about this round was different. Their moans were low, mirroring the secrecy of their little moment perfectly, yet quavering with pleasure. It was the first time that they felt everything so different intensely with their roles being like that.. and oh, how they were feeling it. At some point of course, in his from the pleasure clouded mind, Lan Xichen questioned what had happened - what was going on, yet he wasn't able to ask, for so many reasons.

Jiang Cheng was meanwhile doing it all on purpose. Even though he lied to himself about it being a simple payback and not giving his lover the many overwhelming thrusts he was growing used to by now - in truth somehow he couldn't bring himself to go about things in his normal way due to how Lan Xichen had looked while asking him to "hold him".. which was such clear aching for this loving like kind of embracing, completely differently from when the Jade had asked to be messed up to be able to let go. It was a little hard, every so often in between, to keep all of this up no matter the pace or anything that was happenng.. but how could he roughly fuck someone who had begged him to be lovingly held with this suffocating amount of trust in his eyes.

,,A-Cheng?!"

The younger leaders body had just so grown used to the foreign way of making love, barely letting out a noise from how much he felt making him grow silent. They were still impossible to detach lip wise, the tamed god's fingers playing with his hair, both of their eyes closed.. as out of nowhere the somewhat hesitant, a tad loud voice of Nie Huaisang broke the silence.

,,Jiang Cheng, are you here?"

,,What?!"

No one would believe them if they would one day tell someone that they had simply continued to make love, while an intruder was standing only a few metres away in the main hall of the room. Jiang Cheng only broke the kiss and stopped the movements of his hips as other than how he had hoped his former friend didn't simply leave again. His tone so annoyed and expression yelling "murder". Silence broke out for a few seconds, Nie Huaisang was probably thinking about running away after getting half a heart attack.. during those moments the one born in Yunmeng leaned down, distracting his mind that was about to be taken over by rage with placing soft pecks over his lovers neck. Surprisingly enough, apart from going bright red in the face, the gentleman Jade didn't react any further, even letting his head fall to the side to expose more of his sensitive, hot skin.

,,D-.. Do you know where Zewu-Jun is..?"

Nie Huaisangs voice had gone a few tads lower, just so audible, other than the fear and hesitation which was so extremely audible.

,,Why the fuck should I know where the hell he is?!"

Jiang Cheng didn't even lift his head an inch away from his lovers skin anymore, too done with the good-for-nothing's mere existence.

,,Well.. Wei Ying said Zewu-Jun planned to go to your room.."

,,I'm fucking trying to sleep because your damned maid let me starve after throwing my meal over me. Are you trying to say I'm hiding the Lan in my bedroom? Come look if you dare, you good-for-nothing."


	105. XiCheng 77

It was only after saying those few words that the one born in Yunmeng lifted his head some further, the Jade underneath him had started to shake and as he glanced up.. Seeing Lan Xichen, the prim and proper Lan, bite on his lip to hold back his laughter that was visibly trying to leave his body so desperately made Jiang Cheng almost grin in this mischievious, boyish way himself.

,,Oh.. Oh god no, A-Cheng, I.. I didn't mean to imply such a thing.."

,,Good for you."

Another pause, as no door could be heard opening and closing the tsundere spoke up again, his tone a literal threat at it's finest even though he actually asked nothing but a simple question.. In a Jiang Cheng way, of course.

,,What do you even need him for that you're still risking your life with staying here?!"

,,I.. Oh.. It's not an emergency.. I just wanted to ask if he also wants to attend the closing ceremony of the event tomorrow night. Drinks will be served, food as well."

,,Are you dumb? I already said he's not here so why are you waisting our damn time with standing there still?!"

,,I'm sorry.. I'll make sure your next meal will be served to you properly.. Now.."

At the end the poor mental wreck Nie Huaisang didn't even dare finish his "Now excuse me" and simply.. ran off. A few seconds passed before the two inside the bedroom then bursted out laughing, rather loudly as well.

,,Well well, Huan.. not gonna lie, you damn well surprised me with not even pushing me off or trying to hide."

Jiang Cheng said then sooner or later, neither of them out of their fit entirely yet but he still looked at his lover who stared up at him with his red cheeks yet innocent expression. A smirk was playing on the Jiang sect leaders lips - head tilted to the side.

,,I don't even know why I didn't do anything like that in all honesty.."

The Jade admitted, making the younger one snort a laugh at how helplessly dumb the other could be.

,,Well, not like he'd have dared to come in here anyway. Who does he think he is though, bursting into my room without knocking, calling me by my name like that outta nowhere. Fucking headshaker.."

The Jiang Sect leader said, sounding entirely like his usual self as he did while taking a look to the bedroom door over his shoulder.

,,Wanyin?~"

,,Mh?"

It took a few moments before it made click in the Jiang Sect leaders head.. He had turned back around, a brow raised, pretty much instantly after a certain someone had just randomly called him by an even more intimate version of his many names. Lan Xichens lips were trembling, even though pressed together, barely able to hold another bunch of laughter in that then escaped as Jiang Cheng frowned - to the Jade it looked more adorable in that moment in time than scary.

,,What a great sense of humour you have, Huan. I'm laughing so hard."

The younger ones tone so full of "done with his life" sarcasm only made the Lan Sect leader laugh harder, banging his head lightly against the sheets underneath his head. As the fit still wasn't over after more than a minute, Jiang Cheng then went from waiting with a frown to attack - Attack meaning that he leaned down and bit quite hard into the crook of his lovers neck, on the left side, it would definitely leave a bruise.. Lan Xichen however simply tensed and moaned, leaving them both behind wide eyed, staring at one another before the one born in Yunmeng shook his head.

,,I simply can't win here can I?"

Only when the a tad smaller male made that statement while brushing a few strands of his hair out of his face did the wild god truly begin to blush. A bit of an apologetic look taking over his fine facial features yet Jiang Cheng only smirked, leaned down and pulled with his teeth on his lovers lower lip before whispering against them in a tone so dirty it was a crime.

,,You missed your chance to cry for help, Huan.. now, let's continue where we left off~"

,,I wouldn't have gotten the help that I'm in need of from anyone else in this residence anyway, Wanyin~"

Jiang Cheng had to find a way to hide his face, going about teasing the older males neck to hide how flustered he was. It really hit differently when the wild god said such words.. especially since even though full of dirty intent, no curse words were usually used within the phrases. It always highlighted the differences between their characters while at the same time, the tsundere couldn't deny that it had a strong effect on him to have Lan Xichen be this way - just like it was for Lan Xichen with Jiang Cheng's foul language, yet for his standards almost out of character gentleness.

It took maybe a minute before the younger males hips began to move all on their own again, everything going back to exactly how it had been before they got interrupted. For a while Jiang Cheng kept the teasing of his lovers neck going, leaving a few more light bruises of more sucks than bites on the fair skin.. At some point however the urge for the Jades lips pressed against his own took him over once more and he simply gave in, lifted his head, tilted it to the side and let them meet.

In the short moment where they had looked at one another, the pleasure they were getting drowned from was evident. Their eyes clouded and half lidded. Cheeks tinted in a light shade of red from the workout. Their voices escaping ever so faintly, yet honestly. They were once again feeling so overwhelmingly alive as they forgot about the world around them and simply let themselves drown. One of the tamed god's hands was still playing with his younger lovers hair, the other arm quite tightly wrapped around his neck, just like the legs around the Jiang Sect leaders waist.


	106. XiCheng 78

It was unclear how much time had passed before they actually broke the kiss again, not that there lips were any less close. Even before taking a glance at one another they knew from how heavy their breathing had grown and how the older male began to tremble and tense with shorter getting pauses in between that they were getting close. In truth, neither of them was any less close at all and Jiang Cheng - who slowly began to favour this slow, all the way pace - subconsciouly tried to push himself even deeper into the clenching depths of his lover.

A few more minutes, then that would be the next relief for them that day; definitely not the last though. It wasn't until then that the younger leader shifted his weight, wrapping his arm around the tamed god's waist to pull his lower half up.. As Jiang Cheng had already hid his face against his neck for a while, Lan Xichen then spoke up, even during the many moans that escaped from him his lips never failed to be lifted in such a sweet like smile. His tone of course a little rough and off from the little situation they were engaging in.

,,You're making me.. feel so good, Wanyin..~"

Another deep hit against his sweet spot and a noticeable shiver with a bit of tension taking Jiang Cheng over was all the reaction he got,.. causing the Lan Sect leader to continue, unsure what in the world he was even doing.

,,You're.. reaching so deep..~"

,,Fuck.."

,,Do you like how I.. feel, A-Cheng..?~"

,,Could you stop..?!"

While his intentioin was rather unknown to Lan Xichen himself, for the younger one it was "clear" that his lover was intending to get him to mess up again with all this sweet talking. He had let out a curse, tensing more severly as the Jade then asked his question in this rough, aching bottom tone of his. Jiang Cheng then pressed out a mild threat, not that it sounded like one at all though.. after a brief pause he then looked up, his knot already so tight but not quite tight enough. The tamed god's knot reached the same tightness as his gaze travelled over his lovers features.. he looked so wild, the desperate attempt to look mad or at least irritated not reaching his soft, from lust clouded almond colored eyes.

,,To be completely.. fucking honest, Huan.. what gets me going the most is... filling you up inside.. a few times in a row.. pushing my lust deeper and deeper.. so that you'll still feel it hours later..~"

Even though his eyes initially widened, within a second Lan Xichen then smirked and chuckled,.. and as hard as the smaller one tried to frown all seriously, he was still burried inside of his lovers tight muscles and the entire reactions made his expression falter quick.

,,Then do so to your hearts content, Wanyin..~"

The Jade used his chance to land a last final hit, watching Jiang Cheng go all puzzled from this sudden statement. Before the one born in Yunmeng could say anything in response though Lan Xichen then pulled him in with a little force, making their lips meet and within seconds only they got lost in the heat of the moment again. In fact, Jiang Cheng wasn't sure whether he was as flustered, or puzzled, because of what the older male had said or simply because he had said it in such a composed manner - The Lan's strict way of upbringing really seemed to have its pro's and con's.

From the moment where their tongues then began to dance a hot tango again everything went.. quite passionate. The Jiang Sect leaders thrusts went harder and faster, clearly unable to keep his composure during the upcoming rush of his release, while the tamed god slowly began to fall apart underneath him. One of Lan Xichen's hands started to paw and mildly scratch at his scarred back, going back and forth between trembling and tensing. Their sounds of pure pleasure were muffled, not any less haunted like however.

And then finally, after a few last desperate thrusts of the younger one the kiss paused as they both tensed. While Lan Xichen drove over the edge not without leaving a little scratch mark on his lovers back as he moaned just mentioned ones name in pure bliss.. Jiang Cheng had pushed his length all the way in, then he had tensed like the other from head to toe. Once the tamed god had moaned his name the younger one let out such an overwhelmed, choked noise as his knot ripped as well.

Even if he wouldn't have gotten the Lan Sect leaders allowance, the build-up from this slow, interrupted round with the rough and steamy end made it impossible for Jiang Cheng not to push his lust into the clenching hole of his lover any further. It was a true struggle to keep his motions slow and gentle, yet the tsundere did just that as he made them both ride out their intense high.. Not that it wasn't a tad out of a selfish reason at all, with each new bit of cum that spilled out of his twitching length Jiang Cheng was cramping in his own way at the same time.

Jiang Cheng would've gone too far again, yet at some point the memory of their last time in this position and his little accident then caused him to reluctantly stop the motions of his hips. They were both breathless, red faced and a little weak from the workout.. however, as the younger male opened his eyes he got greeted by the Jade staring up at him with that soft, satisfied expression and gentle little smile. While the tsundere didn't notice that he automatically raised a brow as if to ask "What?", Lan Xichen saw it, chuckling softly as he stroked over the smaller males back.

,,You truly know how to make someone feel pleasure, A-Cheng~"

,,Idiot."

The Jade's tone had been so full of honesty and absolutely no shame that the tsundere couldn't help but blurt this little word out.. Which only caused the older one to let out a melodic laugh and Jiang Cheng frowned because of that even more.

,,Wanyin?~"

,,Mh?"

,,Kiss me.~"

,,You really know no shame, do you, Huan?"

,,While I may not know a lot of things, I do know I wish to be kissed.~"

Jiang Cheng had spoken up after letting his lovers hips back down on the sheets and propping himself up on both of his arms. His tone wasn't really annoyed, but as much as he tried to get back into his normal self, the statement the tamed god then made only got him to roll his eyes before shaking his head in defeat.


	107. XiCheng 79

Jiang Cheng shook his head, what had he gotten himself into? This guy really was too much for him.. but watching how a pout formed on those slightly swollen lips of the Jade.. before Lan Xichen could even whine, the younger one had captured them in quite a gentle kiss. The response he got was clear enough, the legs of the Lan Sect leader that were still wrapped around his waist squeezed him while both of the seniors arms ended up wrapping back around his neck.. As hard as the smaller male tried, he couldn't not notice the smile that formed on his lovers lips during the kiss.

A few minutes later they then both shivered as the younger one of them pulled his hips back so his length would leave the filled to the brim tight cage of the other.. Seconds after Jiang Cheng then broke the kiss, unable to stop a smirk from forming on his lips as he sat up while running a hand through his hair. Lan Xichen had let his legs fall onto the sheets after a moment of hesitating, not overly willing to stop just yet but the best things always have to come to an end eventually. The older one of them however didn't quite expect to be attacked by his lover with as dirty words said in a matching tone.

,,Well, well.. It will be rather amusing to watch you sit and walk the next hours..~"

Even though the tamed god's cheeks went a little pink, he still put on a rather confident expression after rolling his eyes - Jiang Cheng didn't even know that the other was physically able to do such a thing so often in one day.

,,I won't deny that this is quite the accurate statement."

,,You're really something.. Anyway, I guess we should stop here. We probably need to take a bath, it would be too obvious though if we go out then."

There was it, the moment where they had to turn back to reality - what an agonizing thing.

,,I don't think anyone would really notice."

,,Probably not. You should wear a robe with a higher collar though because.."

Lan Xichen had by then propped himself up on his elbows, blinking in confusion as his lover reached out and tapped on a few spots on his neck. It took a few seconds before the older males expression turned into a "Oh.."

,,Sorry."

,,Oh, A-Cheng. We both know that you aren't feeling sorry at all."

As he was slowly slipping out of the heat of the moment, it became harder for Jiang Cheng to openly react again. He found the statement amusing, it was the truth as well, yet apart from a twitch of his lips the Jade wasn't able to tickle much more out of him.

,,Will you be alright, going to your room like that?"

,,I will. You aren't aware of that, like most residence of this sect as well but, there are secret tunnels underneath the rooms. I know them quite well."

This time it was the one born in Yunmeng that needed a moment to understand, he had stood up at this point and turned with a questioning expression before responding in his usual tone - that sounded a lot rougher still.

,,I forgot for a moment how close you were to Nie Mingjue."

It was for the briefest of moments but Jiang Cheng could've sworn he saw a rush of sadness appear and vanish from Lan Xichen's handsome features. The smaller sect leader was in the process of undoing his hair as the Jade then sat up.. not without letting out one of those little weirdly surprised yet aroused noises that prompted Jiang Cheng to raise a brow and smirk while eyeing his lover up and down.

,,Feeling good, Huan?~"

The Jade however didn't reply instantly, instead he got up from the bed, stretched and lifted his white pants up from the ground before putting his lower garments back on. Jiang Cheng was watching that happen out of the corners of his eyes, unable not to take note of how elegantly the other did even something as simple as getting dressed and collecting his forehead ribbon as well as hair accessory. As his lover then walked up to him, the younger one quickly looked away,.. He didn't expect however to end up pressed with his nude backside against the wall. One of Lan Xichen's hands trapped him from running while the fingertips of his other hand lightly teased over the still quite erect length of the Jiang Sect leader.

As much as Jiang Cheng tried to glare, the smirk playing on the taller leaders lips and this absurdly gentle yet intimidating look in his eyes.. Let's just say that the bit of retirement from the tsunderes length was history within a few seconds only as he stood there wary but weirdly paralysed.

,,Not a single time did you fail to make me feel good, my dear.. I will call you and a few others to my room later for a meeting, try to bring or hide one of your night robes.. I wish to return the favour throughout the night, Wanyin~"

Before he was able to counter the attack, the Jade had already captured his lips in a, for Lan Xichen standards, quite rough kiss as the gentle but big hand pumped his length a few times. The older one kept that going until he had tickled out the first hungry noise from his lover, then he broke the kiss and pulled his hands away, smirking with this oh so pleased look on his face. Again, before Jiang Cheng was able to do a thing, the wild god.. simply left. He simply left without saying another word.

The younger sect leader could hear a rather strange noise then only seconds later.. He couldn't even storm after his lover though because of how weak he was feeling on his legs. Apart from that he felt so deeply embarrassed. He was rock hard, twitching, aching, red in the face with his mind shut down and left behind with a body that seemed to listen more to the Lan Sect leader than himself. The confident, top Jade would probably kill him one day.. whether that be the result of suicide caused from shame or a literal heart attack.. who knew?

During the time Jiang Cheng needed to regain the control over himself, Lan Xichen had made his way back to his room. On his way however he had paused in one of the tunnel, crouched down on the ground and hid his face behind his hands - unable to believe that he had actually just done.. that. He was feeling so guilty, but more than that embarrassed to the point where he didn't turn back around and instead drowned himself in the Nie Sects tub as soon as he could. The younger one pretty much proceeded to do the same, just that he was kind of mad at himself for always letting the Jade turn him into a fool and letting him literally escape afterwards.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to take a moment to say that I will be uploading extras for this story. They are timeline wise set after the end of the "Snow Sculpture Event", in the break where JC & LXC won't meet which will be back and forth a few weeks, or months. I'm still unsure how I should call the extra's series since it's 50/50 between SSE and the second part of the story that'll be posted under a different name.
> 
> If anyone has tips, maybe someone who's using this site for longer then I'd gladly accept them & thank you for your patience my dear reader.
> 
> From here on out the story will go back to the characters outside for a while, but I promise for those that want to see more WangXian there'll be some content coming soon - especially the extras that focus on the growth of their relationship after the incident in the Nie Sect.


	108. Important Info

Hello my dear reader.

I just wanted to take a moment to explain a few things and announce a little something as well.

I have uploaded the first extra for this story just now in a new series on my site. It would be best if you try to bookmark this series & read the extras since they are mostly what I'll write for the timespan between the slowly upcoming end of this fic and before the start of the second part of it. As I mentioned previously, I will publish everything after the end of the Snow Sculpture Event under a different title. Just know that those extra chapters will be needed to understand more of what is going on in the second half - also for all WangXian fans most of those extras will be about them.

Now to explain a few things just so you know what's going on in your writers mind:

\- The ages of the characters for this story, or in general, are something I'm still quite unsure about. What I can say though is that it plays around 2 years after the end of the novel and WangXian are married for around as long.

\- In case anyone wondered: I'm thinking about the donghua/anime version of the characters mostly while writing. However, I'm using the official eye color (almond) for JC because that usually never gets used. I stan grey eyes but, ya know

\- I currently don't intend to turn any of the Juniors possible combinations into a ship. Not only because I got a lot I'm thinking about and writing already but simply because idek who to ship there. If enough people comment on here which they want then I might think about writing one in

\- JL is about to turn 18 in this fic, while LSZ is around 20 & Jingyi around Sizhuis age - not that they act like it at all though. JL will take over his fathers sect within the break between the two stories, once he has turned 18. Most of them would logically be a bit taller as well. JL is more or less already living in the Lanling Jin sect & undergoing special training to take over his dads position.

\- Know that if you have any wishes for this fic, I will try to do something with them as long as you mention them - logically.

\- I don't plan to let this fic have a bad, or tragic, end for any of the characters that are - or could be - involved. There'll be ups and downs and so forth but I can take some weight off of your shoulders there.

\- Kudos, Comments & sharing this fic is always welcome and appreciated! I try to read and reply to all the comments I get, even if it means that I reply to several of the same person at once.


	109. Wen Ning & Song Lan | Intro /WangXian/Juniors

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For all those that are wondering where those chapters come from.  
> I posted a Headcanon on my tumblr a while ago, which I sometimes do and include them in either my ficlets/shorts or in this story.  
> There was someone who really wanted to read about them/that headcanon, so here it is quite belated. Please note that Song/Wen won't be a ship & if anyone doesn't want to read the chapters about them make a comment & I'll tell you which chapters you can/have to skip.

,,How's he?"

Wei Ying asked once they had a bit of time to themselves. Hence he, Lan Wangji and Wen Ning. The Juniors were meanwhile still kneeling on the ground, Jingyi half scared to death as, after he had already started to atone for his sin, the younger Lan brother worsened his punishment. The Juniors hadn't heard that there was the possibility Sandu Shengshou had gotten injured. At least Jin Ling and Lan Sizhui ended up joining their.. friend.

Wen Ning turned, due to how long he remained silent even without his expression really giving it away, Wei Wuxian knew that the other was confused. It was at this point that the oldest of them came back with a cup of tea for himself and his husband, so the younger one of the lovebirds gave his old friend a moment longer.. Which seemed to work since just as the husbands turned to look at him Wen Ning spoke up in a minimally audibly questioning tone.

,,Master Song?"

Wei Ying nodded, confirming that his friends guess was right - at this point the Jades attention also shifted entirely to them.. And not only his, if possible the ears of the Juniors would've probably grown extremely large to pick up what they were talking about.

,,He spends all night staring at the pouches that contain the souls.. It's not easy for him to nurture them back to health, since he has no voice to talk to them..."

,,All Daozhang Song will be able to do is hold onto them and make sure they won't get any more damaged. It will take them a lot longer to heal, if he won't find a way to communicate with them more directly.."

The former Yiling Patriarch added, causing Wen Ning to nod almost in a sad way as he played with a piece of his sleeve. After a moment he hesitantly spoke up again, mostly because of Lan Wangji's presence.

,,I tried to think about ways to help Master Song.. I thought that maybe if someone could talk for him, say the things he can't say, that that might help.. Or that he could learn how to play an instrument and use music.."

,,Did you tell Song Lan about those conclusions?"

Wei Ying sighed as his friend flinched as soon as his husband had said those few words. It was a nightmare to watch those two interact and even if it was nothing but a simple question, the younger one of the husbands knew that it was some childish act of poking at Wen Ning's weak spots. Like guessed, after a few seconds Wen Ning hesitantly shook his head before speaking up again.

,,I didn't think he would agree, even if I said anything. He's... clearly trying to shoulder all of that alone."

,,More than likely because he thinks it's all his fault. You should still tell Daozhang Song about your ideas.. I will continue to work on ideas how to restore his ability to speak, I can't promise I'll manage it though and so it wouldn't be bad if he has another way to communicate.. If not, he might never manage to let the souls heal."

Wen Ning's eyes widened minimally, for his awake moments the movement of lifting his head had happened rather fast as well - Hearing what his friend said, only to see Lan Wangji nod in silent agreement made him panic and his mind fill with guilt. After a bit, the Ghost General then spoke up again, it was faint but his tone did sound somewhat defeated, guilty and sad.

,,I don't think he will be there still when we arrive back in Gusu.."

,,Did he say so?"

Wei Ying asked while raising a brow, he was cuddled up to his other half by then as they were sitting on their mats around their snow figures. He hadn't even needed to ask and again, like he had guessed, Wen Ning shook his head. Deep down inside the person from the former generations of cultivators that had changed the least from his original self was really Wen Ning after all.

,,You invited him to stay, right?"

A hesitant nod of Wen Ning was the only reply Wei Wuxian got.

,,Then stop being negative. You won't know if he has left or not until we're back in good old Gusu Lan."

Wen Ning who had averted his gaze glanced up, his old friend was grinning at him, holding his cup of tea in his direction as if to make a toast. It didn't completely convince the Ghost General but the cheerful Wei Wuxian rarely left anyone untouched, in a mental sense especially.

~💙~

Not long after that bit of a conversation, once Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian had finished their tea the latter then yelled a simple.

,,Time's over. You'll all help Sizhui redo his snowmans head and after that you'll throw snowballs 'til your hands freeze off!~"

As glad as Jin Ling and Jingyi had been for the briefest of moments to be able to move.. As soon as Wei Wuxian spoke up, in a tone so cheerful that it was clear he'd make them go through hell, their expressions and heads dropped. The only one of the three boys to get up instantly, stretch and start to move was of course Lan Sizhui - which in turn prompted the other two that didn't want to look bad against him to move as well.

,,Lan Zhan~"

,,Mn?"

The taller one of them glanced down as his other half sat down sideways on his lap with no sense of shame about being out in the open - Not that either of them still had such thing left. Lan Wangji then tilted his head to the side as Wei Wuxian gestured him with his finger to "lend him his ear", which of course he did after wrapping his arms around his husband.

,,I really wish to sleep with you later, Er-Gege~"

Wei Ying could've sworn his first love had choked a little as he heard the seductive whisper that was full of want, titling his head back.. yep, the Jade's ears had instantly turned a nice shade of red and oh how satisfied with himself the feared Patriarch felt.


	110. Wen Ning & Song Lan | Intro 2

While the two lovebirds were barely able to keep their hands to themselves, the Juniors were blushing a deep dark red because of how embarrassed they were about this display. Wen Ning however had spaced out, he was lost in thought as he recalled what had happened 3 days before they had started their journey to the Nie Sect.

~💙~

Quite a bit of time had passed since both Wei Ying and Wen Ning had "come back".. And it also took almost a year before the Juniors and Wei Wuxian had managed to convince Wen Ning that he should get himself some sort of a home. As much as they wished for it to be different, the Ghost General couldn't live within the Lan Sect - they were still grieving the "loss" of their beloved younger Jade to the Yiling Patriarch secretly. Even as Wei Wuxian had asked, his old friend declined to live in a proper home.. whether that was because Wen Ning thought he didn't deserve one, or a living corpse like him shouldn't have one, or something else was something neither of the friends wanted to talk about.

At the end it was only when Wen Ning's next birthday arrived and A-Yuan got him the finest of clothing after months of saving up that his uncle agreed to have the most simple of sheds build for him. He didn't have the heart to lay in the dirt and all those matters with the clothes his A-Yuan had gifted him. In general, Wen Ning had turned into a free man by then already.

The area where they ended up building the shed was one of the nicest they could find. It was close to the Lan Sects entrance area, in the middle of a field with a spring of the clearest of waters close by. Like Wen Ning had wished, people weren't too close, nor too far, yet animals which he loved could be spotted everywhere, if you'd be silent enough for them to approach. It wasn't like the Ghost General wasn't needed anymore, but he wasn't getting used anymore in a violent sense unless absolutely necessary during tricky nighthunts.

Needless to say that the makeshift shed first of all didn't manage for long, nor was it ever a real solution. It wasn't until Wen Ning decided he wanted to give his nephew a gift back though that his life slowly really began to change - positively. He needed money and he for sure wouldn't steal - With that being said, one day he had made his way into the city, dressed nicely, with his hair tamed into a ponytail. Regardless of being dead and relatively used to be surrounded from the Juniors by then - sometimes only two, other times three or all four of them - he was still so socially awkward that he could do nothing but walk around with his head down. Making the decision to search for work had been way easier than actually asking for a job at the end.

After a while of walking like that fate decided to be nice to the Ghost General for once. He was just walking along a rural road as he suddenly heard a noise of something falling and turned: The groceries an elderly lady had bought had fallen down to the ground and she was clearly having issues with her back, that caused her to groan in this typical granny manner as she tried to bend down. Wen Ning moved naturally to come to her aid, still acting as shy as always yet to his surprise she treated him so gently, clearly thankful to have some help and at the end she even gave Wen Ning a bit of money once they had arrived at her house - Of course, he tried to turn it down but she asked him then if he didn't have anyone dear to him that he wanted to buy something for maybe, going on to trail off about how her children and grandchildren were living too far away for her to have any help or the chance to do so for them.

From there on out Wen Ning would help the granny out with whatever task she couldn't handle anymore - and sure enough, the word spread and he turned into some sort of loved grand kid and helper of the elderly. Within weeks Wen Ning had enough money to buy his beloved A-Yuan a gift, yet he didn't stop helping the elderly and soon a few widowed women as well. Due to having found a bit of a purpose in life though, even as he began to collect more clothing to look appropriate, the shed that they tried to fix all few weeks depending on the weather really turned out to be not the best to store clothing and live in, given the new circumstances.

Almost another year had passed, Wei Ying's and Lan Wangjis second marriage anniversary was coming up.. but of more importance was that A-Yuan was about to turn 18, which meant he could sleep outside of the Cloud Recesses occasionally as well - not in that shed, not under Wen Ning's watch. The General barely managed to get halfway through his "You're about to turn into an adult, I would like to have a better place so you can visit-" before A-Yuan had already agreed loudly and passionately. It turned out to be quite complicated however to build a proper, robust house given the fact that the Juniors were often away and Wei Ying couldn't always help his friend either - not that it had ended well the few times he was supposed to properly work.. not that Wen Ning didn't want Wei Ying to really help because of Lan Wangji, that absolutely, totally wasn't the case; of course it was.

Due to the forced pauses in between, Wen Ning was still living mostly in the shed that was located right beside the home they were building for him and more or less his nephew. It was more of a chaos over all, the process of the house building, than anything else..


	111. Wen Ning & Song Lan | 1

It had been around the time three days before their departure that Wen Ning had went to the city again to see if any of his "friends" still needed something before he would be away. He didn't like the idea of leaving them hanging at all..

As he was walking through the streets however he spotted a extremely tall, dark clothed figure that a part of him seemed to recognise. Probably due to his intense stare as he tried to figure out where he knew the person from and unconsciously following the person that had two swords and a horse whisk on his back - the "stranger" turned and Wen Ning of course looked away in an instant.

Strangely enough, instead of walking away or trying to slash him apart at once though, the "stranger" closed the few metres gap between them. As the person stopped right in front of the clearly socially awkward Wen Ning and not a word being said even after around two minutes the latter then looked up.

,,You.."

The tall man faintly nodded while the General in turn went on to bow in respect, even for him it was impossible to not recall that face.

,,I apologise, Master Song. I did not intend to interrupt you, I just saw you from behind and had trouble recalling where I know you from. What leads you here? Can I possibly help you?"

The supposed stranger was anything but that - he was Song Lan, the only other "sane" fierce corpse beside Wen Ning. Let's just say that he wasn't any less socially awkward though and apart from that he still couldn't speak which.. made things even more awkward, which Wen Ning realised after a few seconds.

~ I was in the area and trying to see if there are any disturbances here. It doesn't seem like it. ~

,,Oh.. Young Master Wei and Hanguang-Jun keep this area free from any type of negative occurences."

Wen Ning said after a moment, he had been surprised by the fact that by then Song Lan had began to use a small book and some sort of pen to communicate. Song Lan in turn nodded, he had guessed that much at this point.

,,A-Ning! A-Ning, can you come help us? Something happened on the farm nearby!"

The voice of a upset widow caused Wen Ning to turn his attention from Song Lan to her, she looked like she was in a hurry, holding a small child on her arm that was sucking its thumb.

,,Of course. I'm sorry master Song, I need to leave."

Wen Ning responded, recognising that something relatively bad must've happened. To both the ladies and his surprise however the extremely tall man followed close behind them.

It turned out that some farming equipment had fallen over, a man in his late 40's was stuck underneath but at least didn't seem to be injured badly. Wen Ning had taken a quick note of the over all situation before bending down, getting a hold of the farming equipment. Before he could even lift it up, which wouldn't have been much a task for him, he saw the black, tall figure appear beside him - also in a kneeling position. It wasn't like they had ever worked together so far, but looking over Song Lan was already looking at him and within a short moment Wen Ning moved further to the right side of the farming equipment, knowing intuitevely that the other wanted to lend a hand. With joined forces they helped the man and only after making sure the farmer would survive did the attention of most shift to the stranger they had never seen before.

,,Thank you, young master. If you could tell us your name, we would like to show our gratitude with a meal, or money. Thank you as well A-Ning."

The lady that called out for Wen Ning was the first to direct a few words at both of the fierce corpses,.. She couldn't know though that Song Lan wasn't able to talk and as the latter only lifted his hand and shook his head most looked at Wen Ning in confusion.

,,This is Master Song Lan. He.. is mute, so I apologise that he wasn't able to introduce himself."

,,Is he the same as you?"

,,Y-.. Yes.. Not for as long however, so a meal isn't what he would be able to cherish either."

,,What a shame.."

It was hard to say whether the lady found it a shame that this tall, handsome guy was dead, or that he couldn't enjoy food any longer. The elderly around them looked especially sad though that there was another person they couldn't thank with a meal.

,,Then at least take some money-"

An older lady that wasn't a granny just yet then spoke up, pulling out a pouch that was hanging around her waist area - Song Lan however only shook his head even more determinded like than before, causing everyone to stare at Wen Ning again who felt so awkward.

,,I think Master Song is trying to say that he can't possibly accept money for helping someone in need. It is his way of living."

,,Alright then.. If you would hand us your coat, many of us are good at stitching, or even former clothing maker.. There are a few holes in it, that much should be fine, or?"

Wen Ning felt quite sorry for Song Lan who didn't seem to be that different to him in terms of character and then being pushed into such an impossible to overcome corner. After a few moments of hesitating, the waiting stares of like 10 plus women - mostly middle aged and older - then caused Song Lan to give in. Wen Ning in turn offered him a helping hand with holding onto the two swords and the horse whisk as the silent one got rid of his coat and hesitantly handed it over to one of the smallest and oldest of the ladies. No matter the age though, they all wore a grin from their success as Song Lan went back to his stiff like position after taking his belognings back from Wen Ning who again bowed slightly.


	112. Wen Ning & Song Lan | 2

,,Come back in four days, young master."

The oldest of the ladies said as Song Lan grew suspicious of what could possibly take them four days to fix. The one entirely dressed in black however simply nodded, unwilling to cause anyone - including himself - a longer interruption from their daily routine.

,,I'll be here for 3 more days, if you need anything still that you forgot to tell me now then send one of the children over."

Wen Ning said his first few words normally, the elderly looking at him with such fond, thankful expressions - However, as he glanced over the spot beside him was no longer filled with the tall mans presence and so he hurriedly finished what he had to say before waving and more or less rushing after Song Lan.

,,I am so sorry Master Song.. they can be a bit stubborn at times, but they don't mean to cause you any discomfort. I apologise though if they did."

Song Lan paused so suddenly within his fast paced steps that Wen Ning barely managed to not bump into his back. As the taller one then turned and reached for his book again Wen Ning couldn't quite meet his gaze until the book got held up in front of his eyes.

~ You should not apologise for the good deeds of others, or else they might start to believe that what they are doing right is truthfully wrong in nature. People have stopped doing the most righteous of things because of such reasons. ~

Reading those lines he hadn't expected, Wen Ning began to fiddle with his fingers. After a moment he spoke up as Song Lan closed his book, the smaller one hadn't expected such depth of words getting thrown at him.

,,Many years ago my sister tried to stop me from doing what we both knew was right. We were cultivator that focused on medical treatment.. At the end even though I went against her and did the right thing, so many things went terribly wrong after that as a result of what I did right."

~ You are only able to control your own actions, not what everyone around you will make out of it. If you walked the right path, even if it did not end well, you should still not regret. Whether you do nothing but good deeds in your life or not, one person alone is unable to change the world. ~

Wen Ning looked down at the ground after finishing to read those again so deep words.. A moment later Song Lan again began to walk and Wen Ning rushed after him, speaking a bit more loudly as Song Lan didn't pause in his steps until he had finished his speech.

,,You're probably right, Master Song.. But.. do you have a place to stay? For the next three days and nights, I mean.."

The smaller one again almost bumped into the others back as just mentioned one paused. Scooting to the side Wen Ning watched how Song Lan half turned and shook his head.

,,Then.. Do you want to stay at my place? Since you usually don't take money, it would be a waste to take a room at an inn.."

It was a thought Song Lan would punish himself in some way, some day, for.. Staring down at the smaller one who looked between awkward and weirdly jittery.. he couldn't help but make two resemblences out: The first was with a toddler, the second with a puppy. He definitely preferred Wen Ning more since even though he was somewhat demanding, he was at least quite clean and not touching him which were enough positive points about a person for Song Lan. Probably just alone out of guilt from Wen Ning's appearance getting overlapped back and forth with a pup did the taller one end up nodding after maybe a minute had passed.

Even though he wasn't able to change his expressions all that much, from the way Wen Ning reacted over al it was clear that he was rather dumbfounded. Sure, he had asked.. but that didn't mean he had expected a yes whatsoever. At the end Song Lan gestured with his hand for the other to lead the way and.. let's just say the way the taller one of the fierce corpses stood in front of the "two" houses out of which one was falling apart and the other barely build made it clear that he wasn't convinced.

,,I'm sorry.. It looks worse than it is, I promise! We're trying hard to finish the house but we either always need to leave or we.. we really don't have much of an idea what we're even doing.."

Wen Ning admitted as he rubbed with his hand over the back of his head, clearly an awkward gesture.. For Song Lan however, something about it made him feel pain, it had to be huge for a corpse like him to feel it. Not even a moment after the faint sting did he mentally nod to himself. Just like Xiao Xingchen.. that was his "problem". Out of them Song Lan, even with his mysophobia, had always been the rougher one for physical actions while Xiao Xingchen had been the people person. For Song Lan dirt was still more acceptable than people and physical contact, he didn't even know why he had such an issue.

As Wen Ning then gestured him to come inside the shed, Song Lan was surprised that the inside of it really didn't look as bad. Sure, there were a few things standing around where the melting drops of snow dripped into from spots where the roof wasn't leak-proof anymore but.. There were two beds, blankets, pillows, even a wardrobe and soap in midst of other normal all-day every-day necessaries.

,,If you need anything, let me know.. I'll go back for a few more hours since I promised earlier to help the elderly with their grocery shopping."

Saying that, Wen Ning then turned and began to walk.. This time he was the one pausing in between of his steps before turning and Song Lan now almost bumped into him.


	113. Wen Ning & Song Lan | 3

,,Master Song.. You really don't need to go out of your way to help me.."

Wen Ning said as he stood there, lifting his hands to further underline how serious he was.. The only reply he got however was Song Lan walking past him, taking a few steps before pausing and half turning as if to say "What are you waiting for?" and so the smaller one hesitantly followed - while feeling quite awkward.

The awkwardness didn't really subside during the next few hours.. Even though Wen Ning knew how Song Lan was from tales, watching the silent man pick groceries and even carry them was.. strange. It was even stranger to watch him get treated so casually from the elderly, while the children couldn't help but stare and comment on his height quite a lot. The general couldn't know that even if he wouldn't have been robbed of his ability to talk, his comrade for the day wouldn't have said much - if anything - either way.

Wen Ning did pick up on something fairly quickly though. Song Lan didn't like to be touched. If anyone came too near, he would respectfully bow after taking a step back. Apart from that, after almost each time where he had finished a task, he would wash his hands.

As they had finished their endless rounds of grocery shopping and they went back into the stunning wooded area Wen Ning walked back into the shed.. Only to pause in confusion, turn back and walk outside to where he had lost his comrade for the day.

,,Master Song..?"

He asked, hesitantly, head tilted to the right.. The taller one stared at him for a moment longer, then pulled his book and weird brush back out - turning it a moment later.

~ Aren't you going to continue working on the house? ~

Looking down, Wen Ning fiddled with his fingers as he replied.

,,I would need to do a few more things at the rooftop so the floors won't get drenched from the snow.. However, it's not so easy for me to climb up and down repeatedly on the rooftop, I've.. I've always been rather clumsy.. Also, I don't wish to cause you discomfort with all the noises from the building, you're my guest after all."

Staring for a moment longer, Song Lan then walked away as the other remained dumbfounded on his spot. Wen Ning was still standing there as he taller one came back two minutes - or so - later, no longer carrying the swords and sleeves rolled up.. Then he stood there, staring at the General with his arms crossed; clearly waiting.

,,Oh.. Oh no, you really don't have to! M-Master Song, please.."

If anyone would hear them.. well, only Wen Ning talk like that who knows what kind of ideas they may have gotten. The reality was though that Song Lan, as the younger one went back to being a shy and afraid chicken, simply turned and went about walking around while picking up a few things. Of course that didn't happen without Wen Ning sticking to his heels while trying to get him to go back into the house - god were they both stubborn in their own ways.

It wasn't until a few minutes later that the General then ended up actually bumping into the tall mans back as just mentioned one paused in his steps out of nowhere.

,,I-.. I'm sorry.."

Wen Ning stumbled over his words, even dead for so long didn't change his character all that much. Song Lan however only tensed before taking another step, then he turned, pulled his book out and wrote a few lines that left the smaller one both feeling guilty and wide eyed.

~ There are two beds within the shed. Don't you have someone you hold dear that you want to build the house for? I thought you would know, since we are the same but: You should not waste your time, since you can never say when your last minute alive will be. Or your last chance to express or do something. ~

,,You are right.. I'm sorry.. I also should be more thankful for you being ready to help me in the first place instead of turning you down, master Song.."

If he could've sighed - Song Lan would've.. Like that though, he could only stare as he sighed mentally to himself before pushing the wooden bucket with the tools they needed against the others chest. The taller one only saw out of the corner of his eyes that the General had faintly bowed but he decided to ignore it.

Even though Wen Ning had openly admitted to his clumsiness, the silent one only started to believe him after he had fallen off of the rooftop for the third time. It wasn't like Song Lan was an actual asshole but, after being in many shit situations due to trusting someone and so forth, he did test the General first.. After the third time however, he stopped Wen Ning - who hadn't made any progress on the roof at all - with putting his arm between the latter and Wen Ning. Pointing to the bits and pieces for the rooftop, then to Wen Ning, then to himself and up to the roof it took a moment before the smaller one of them let out a "Ah!"

They spend the next few hours until sundown with Song Lan on the rooftop while Wen Ning handed him whatever he needed at the time. It had taken a bit before they were able to communicate.. but in truth it really didn't take that long for them to be somewhat in sync, reacting to one another's silent glances and pointing with fingers. Sooner or later they didn't even need that anymore because they got a routine.

Crouching down beside one another at the river, Wen Ning then spoke up as they washed their hands - the taller one of them took quite a bit longer, not that the General minded it.

,,Thank you so much for helping me today, Master Song.. But please, you don't need to help me any more than you already did. I will finish the rooftop alone-"


	114. Wen Ning & Song Lan | Final / WangXian, Wen Ning & Juniors

To Wen Ning's surprise his silent comrade shook his head while inspecting his hands. As Song Lan looked over, the image of Wen Ning overlapped again with that of a puppy, due to how he tilted his head - even without clear expressions forming on his face. Reaching into his robe, he pulled out his brush and paper again, writing a single line before turning it so the other could read it.

~ No need, it's finished. ~

,,That can't be.. it was so incomplete when we started.."

As faint as the disbelief was within the Ghost Generals voice, as faint was the shrug of the other.. Who then simply put his belognings back, got up, fixed his clothing and began to walk back to the shed with the puppy Wen Ning quickly following.

Entering a few seconds after the tall man, Wen Ning stopped in his tracks as he looked at Song Lan.. Song Lan was standing there in front of the Generals poor looking wooden table, staring silently down at the two white pouches with light blue ribbons and Lan Sect clouds on them.

,,Are those.."

Almost as soon as he had asked, Wen Ning knew he should feel regret even if he wasn't able to feel it properly any longer. Song Lan however nodded, slowly and just twice. Closing most of the gap between them, the taller one lifted his arm as if to stop the General from getting too close yet Wen Ning only sat down on a chair which caused Song Lan to relax - somewhat at least.

,,.. How.. How are they..?"

The younger one asked after several minutes of silence during which Song Lan had sat down on the other chair inside of the shed - neither able to tear their gazes away from the pouches.

~ Barely any progress ~

It was the first time that Song Lan didn't finish a sentence he wrote off with a dot, as if to highlighten how hopeless he felt while at the same time not closing the chapter with it.

Wen Ning didn't know what to say.. That he was sorry? That the other shouldn't give up? That there was hope?

At the end they spend the next few hours in silence.. Only as the darkness of the night had taken over the Gusu's usually bright area did Wen Ning move. He didn't need sleep, yet spending the night laying in a bed still gave him something - a melancholic something. Song Lan however didn't move once apart from when he so gently and carefully placed the pouches to rest on his palms.

Somewhere during the first night Wen Ning had thought of the things he would days later go on to say to Wei Wuxian in the Nie Sects garden.. However, it was too late. Song Lan must've began his next journey already a day after they had set off.. Only when they were on the boat did Wen Ning confide into Lan Wangji and his old friend. No one had visited him during the past three days before they set off, so no one had known..

Within the two days where Wen Ning was at home still, Song Lan had disappeared a few times. The younger one never questioned this behaviour.. in general they weren't in need of much words. Whenever the entirely in black dressed one came back, they went back to working on Wen Ning's future home - that had too many rooms for sure. It wasn't like Song Lan had seen him off either and a day after their departure he would be able to get his coat back.. Wen Ning was left again with regret about another new little thing.

The only thing he had been able to do for Song Lan at the end was.. that once when the taller one left and the pouches remained on his bed, Wen Ning had kneeled down and spoken as gently to them as he could.

,,Ehm.. Hello.. I.. I am Wen Ning.. Daozhang Xiao XingChen, you will probably not know me.. or if you heard of me, then nothing good.. Young Lady A-Qing.. I am the one that fought Daozhang Song Lan in Yi City.. You might not listen to me.. but I would like to ask you to do so.. I came to talk to you in Daozhang Song's stead.. He is really worried about your future.. He allows no one to touch you, almost never leaves you two where he can't see you.. He is always holding on to you, so carefully.."

For a moment Wen Ning paused, as he heard no foreshadowing noises of the other coming back, he continued.

,,It might not be my place to say so.. and I apologise if I am going too far but.. Please, if you hear me, think about letting yourselves heal.. I know the world you've seen was a terrible place, I have lost my life.. my sister, everything as well.. but things changed! You have someone waiting for you who truly cares! The world isn't as dark as you might think.. even those that helped us win against Xue Yang truly wish for a new chance and a brighter life for the both of you.. So.. please.. if possible.. consider giving the world another chance.."

Wen Ning knelt there, staring at the pouches, for a few minutes longer.. He didn't know what he was waiting or hoping for.. but at some point he got back up and acted as if he was poking around in the fire as he heard Song Lan come back.

~💙~

,,Master Wen..?"

The voice of his secret nephew snapped Wen Ning back into reality. Looking up he saw that all others, including Lan Wangji, had gotten up already.

,,Yes..?"

,,We finished the rebuilding of the snowman, now we're all going into the woods to train how to properly thow snowballs, do you want to join us?"

There was such a hopeful hint in Lan Sizhui's eyes.. Of course Wen Ning wanted to join. As he moved, his nephew held out a hand to help him up that Wen Ning then surely took.

,,I'm going to be the best in no time!"

Jingyi said loud and proud, walking backwards in front of everyone else.

,,As if."

Jin Ling responded, no one expected Wei Wuxian to speak up.

,,Oh please.. As if anyone would be able to beat me or Wen Ning.. Even Lan Zhan will be better than y'all in no time!~"

,,Does Senior Wen have such a high pinpoint accuracy?!"

Jingyi almost tripped while Sizhui got a hold of him - Jin Ling only glared silently at his not by blood related uncle. How dare someone underestimate him like that.

,,Just between the 6 of us, Wen Ning has always been more talented at shooting a bow than Jiang Cheng for sure!"

If nothing could get the young Mistress's attention, someone possibly being able to teach him how to be better at something than his "never satisfied with anything he accomplished" uncle was this "nothing".

Poor Wen Ning however already knew that, with how much attention would be on him after that statement, he would probably not even be able to hit himself.. What a unfair player Wei Wuxian was - both Wen Ning and even Lan Wangji thought that, even though the latter truly didn't favour the other.


	115. Chapter 115

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The following are more or less XiCheng chapters but they include too much stuff with other characters mentions and so forth to categorise them as purely such.

There was awkward silence lingering between Jiang Cheng and Lan Xichen as they were the first to arrive at the dining table short before 6pm.. Until then whenever they met - outside a bedroom - they hadn't had to face one another alone, and now that they did.. all they had gotten out were awkward and tense sounding words of greeting.

,,Sect leader Jiang."

,,Zewu-Jun."

Only when the older one of them let out the faintest sound of a cough did Jiang Cheng, who was sitting at the same spot as hours earlier, glance over while the corner of his lips twitched.. After that, no word got spoken as the tsundere drank a few cups of liquor while Lan Xichen silently took sips of his tea.

,,Did you meet the headshaker again?"

The Jade paused, his cup hovering before his lips before he nodded and took another sip of his tea - the faintest of blushes spreading on his cheeks.

,,He's grown some balls, inviting you after.. Either way, why didn't that good-for-nothing invite me?"

Glancing over, Jiang Cheng had been able to see the Lan Sect leaders grip tighten around the cup he had put back on the table. So the scar from what happened to Jin GuangYao still stung - the younger one made a mental note about that to himself. As if nothing had happened however Lan Xichen replied in his usual tone.

,,He invited Wangji and young Master Wei."

Now it was the older males turn to glance at the other who chuckled and shook his head before downing another cup of liquor - speaking in a tone full of bitterness afterwards.

,,How respectful to not even invite me, so I could turn him down."

,,A-Cheng.."

Lan Xichen spoke in a soothing tone, only for them both to tense a moment later because of his little mishap. They were walking on thin ice, unable to turn back already by then.

,,Sect leader Jiang, even though I do not wish to defend Sect leader Nie.. He hasn't explicitly stated you are not allowed to attend. I think.. He would wish for you to be there."

,,He, or someone else?"

Out of natural reflex the older one of them lightly slapped his lovers arm. Even though the words of the tsundere had been as low as a whisper, the teasing tone barely audible, they both knew what he meant.

,,It would be kinda fun, ya know.. His anxious face, if I attend.."

Honestly, Lan Xichen was rather unsure whether the younger one of them meant Nie Huaisang or Wei Wuxian with that statement..

,,Even though I agreed to attend, I'm unsure if I will drink.. On this note.. you should drink a little less as well."

The taller ones tone was calm, a faint hint of worry audible as he watched the other drink like the sixth cup in a row. Jiang Cheng however simply and provocatively went about refilling his cup another time.

,,Wanyin.."

It was only when the Jade used that name and almost a warning like tone that the one born in Yunmeng put the cup, that he had already lifted halfway up, back down. By this point Lan Xichen was almost sure that the excessive way of drinking was caused by nervousness of some kind.

,,I could drink for you."

,,Mh?"

Jiang Cheng suggested, as due to the slowly filling hall no one would really be able to hear him, it was one of the rare times where the taller leader replied with a confused like hum. They were sitting quite prim and proper, never turning their heads to one another - but also not paying too much attention to their surroundings.

,,Tomorrow."

,,I don't think I understand what you're trying to say, Sect leader Jiang."

What Lan Xichen admitted caused the one dressed in fine purple robes to roll his eyes - to him it was so obvious.

,,The drinks you'll get poured, it will be a private gathering, right? If we sit like that, the last thing anyone will pay attention to is us. Nie Huaisang will be about to shit his pants all the way through and the other two will.. be pre-occupied with their usual stuff. I can take your drinks and my own and who knows.."

,,You want me to fool them so we-"

The Jade wasn't able to say the end of his sentence out loud. Not that he needed to as Jiang Cheng already chuckled just from that much being said.

,,If you don't want to go that far, there are other ways."

,,That are?"

They had to pause their conversation at this point as the first servants put trays of only the bests of foods onto their table.. The expression of the male servant, middle aged, was gold as he witnessed Jiang Cheng.. the ever so moody sect leader chuckle yet another time. As he noticed the wide-eyed one however the Jiang Sect leader glared, tilting his head back and to the side as he spoke in his normal tone - so full of a threatening vibe.

,,So there is a servant in this sect capable of putting a tray of food successfully on a table? After what that woman did, I doubted it."

,,S-S.. Sect Leader Nie.. He.. After he.. After he got to know what happened and that.. that everyone had to share their food with you S-Sandu Shengshou.. He.. He ordered us to only bring the best and in mass.."

,,At least something."

It would be a lie to say that Jiang Cheng didn't have a side to himself that loved making idiots shiver in fear for nothing.. Lan Xichen didn't seem too pleased though. It took a few minutes at the end before the entire two tables they pushed together were so full all kinds food and liquor that there was barely any space left to actually eat.

,,How are we supposed to eat all of that..?"

The younger sect leader was unsure if he had ever heard the Jade sound so overwhelmed and lifeless - so much that he couldn't help but poke fun a little.

,,Have fun losing your first time...... Your first time eating more than your sects usual three bowls, of course. It would be worse to leave what you're craving for untouched and all, or not?"

,,Could you stop that already?!"

To Jiang Chengs amusement the other half hissed his words at him - Lan Xichen had just been in the process of taking a berry from one of the trays as the younger one made this obvious statement, causing him to drop the berry and they both watched as it bounced up and down on the plate.


	116. Chapter 116

,,Alright."

The Jiang Sect leader replied, calmly.. a smirk playing faintly on his lips.

,,So.. the other options are?"

Just as the younger one of them glanced over, the Jade had already shoved the - to him - foreign fruit into his mouth. Jiang Cheng then watched as his secret lover was unable to stop his fine facial features from distorting slightly.

,,That one wasn't ripe yet."

,,What is this..?!"

Lan Xichen also wasn't able to drown out the disgust in his tone which only prompted the other to chuckle as he watched the Jade take a sip of his tea - or more a huge gulp.

,,It's a fruit that only grows in a few areas in Yunmeng. I must say, I didn't know the headshaker has deals with our farmers. You should eat one of those, the color has to be less vibrant."

The tsundere explained as he leaned forward and took one of the less colorful berries, or fruits as he called them. It was the first time since they had gathered at the table that they both actually turned to one another as Jiang Cheng held the fruit in between of his index finger and thumb.

~💙~

,,Sandu Shengshou looks.. so peaceful.."

Jingyi whispered, his tone somewhat breathless and swooning like.

The Juniors had been about to enter the dining hall as Sizhui suddenly pulled the other two to the side, using the back of their robes. Holding a finger in front of his mouth he pointed with two of them at his eyes and then to around the area where their table was.

Sure enough, as the other two looked, Jiang Cheng was sitting there with Lan Xichen. Both turned to one another while the younger one held something in his hand.

After whispering those few words the Lan Disciples glanced down, they were more or less stacked over one another after height - so Jin Ling was at the bottom. The boy in his golden robes was silent, gaze fixated on the two inside the dining hall that had turned back after Zewu-Jun had taken whatever his uncle had held in his hand.

What the two Lan boys hadn't been able to see was that their friends complexion had turned from red, to green, to pale and back to bright red within a few mere seconds - What they were able to see as they glanced down while mostly hiding behind the door that lead into the dining hall however was.. The youngest one of them was kneeling there wide eyed, it was hard to say whether it was due to shock or some other emotion.

,,I haven't seen my uncle like that in.. almost 15 years.. If my memory is even real.."

The youngest of the three then said after a minute or so and also after throwing the other two off. Sizhui and Jingyi then followed the other as he took a few steps to the side before sitting down against a wall - of course they joined him. Glancing at their friend, neither of the Lan's for once really knew what to say - which didn't stop Jingyi from saying something anyway.

,,Do you think we provoked something with what we said the other night..?"

,,I didn't know you believe in such tales.."

Even though Sizhui had tried to sound like he was scolding the other Lan, neither of the three could deny that they had this weird feeling that.. they actually had cast some strange spell.

,,Jin Ling.. would you be able to accept such a thing? You're not.. a fan of cut-sleeves at all, after all.."

Well, young master Jin looked extremely dumfounded at Jingyi - Whether that was because of the realisation, the possibility of his uncle and.. or simply because it was the most considerate and nice statement Jingyi had ever directed at him - who knew. Sizhui however joined in a moment later, his tone more stable again.

,,I don't think we should get any wrong ideas just yet.. I mean, they've known each other apperantly for quite the long time, so that doesn't mean anything, does it?"

,,Sure but.. haven't they talked quite a lot? I mean.. look at how peaceful Sandu Shengshou looked just now.. And Zewu-Jun? Doesn't he try to avoid any contact since.."

Sizhui interrupted his Sect member as Jin Ling still hadn't said a word with throwing a warning like glance at him.. after that they all three stared at the ground in a bit of awkward silence.

,,Ignoring what I think about it.. Isn't there too much against them no matter what?"

The younger Lan flinched a little as Jin Ling spoke up out of nowhere with his tone sounding like his soul hadn't entirely returned into his body just yet. Sizhui however just stared at Jingyi with a raised brow before he spoke up - his words causing them all to look weirdly defeated and down.

,,The main problem would be Master Qiren.. and, of course, the fact that Sandu Shengshou definitely needs a heir.."

,,You Lan's don't need one?"

Jin Ling spoke up in a bit of a confused tone, Sizhui however only hesitantly shook his head - almost looking shy like.

,,Even though I'm adopted.. I was raised to take the sect over - in case of emergency.. After all Hanguang-Jun won't produce a heir and Zewu-Jun hasn't married yet either and he's.. in that age by now.. It's safety matters."

For a bit over a minute, the boys grew silent again before to the Lan's surprise Jin Ling spoke up in a low tone.

,,My uncle is 3 to 4 years younger than Zewu-Jun as far as I know.. apart from that he's in perfect health.. I know that if I get more than one child it will be able to turn into Yunmeng's heir.. If I marry within the next 5 to 7 years and bring forth a child or two, there also shouldn't be a problem.."

,,So you aren't against the idea?!"

Jingyi didn't even try to hide his excitement, yet Sizhui nudged him in the side with his elbow as Jin Ling had averted his gaze again and grown silent.


	117. Chapter 117

,,I.. I don't know.. I wouldn't say the thought.. is sitting overly well with me-"

,,Aww, come on.. Didn't you see them-"

,,It's exactly because I saw, that I'm not throwing up right now."

While Jingyi had interrupted Jin Ling, the young future heir interrupted the other then again in a surprisingly scolding like but mature tone. Getting another stronger hit into his side Jingyi then sucked in a breath as he held the now slowly aching spot.

,,You're both living a good life.. you won't need to make choices like those I need to make.. How do you think it feels to be the rightful heir to two sects... Or having to watch my uncle desperately try to find a woman to marry because even if he raised me mostly, my father was a sect leader - my mother only his wife, so the Jin Sect has more rights on me? It's not entertaining to know that my uncle will be even more alone once I do what I have to.."

,,As I thought.. you're actually a really emphatic person, young master Jin."

,,I'm not."

Jin Ling replied quick after Sizhui had spoken in such a soft like tone - The younger ones in turn so overly like him that after a second they all ended up laughing.

,,What are we going to do now?"

,,Playing hidden matchmaker of course!"

Sizhui smiled a little awkwardly as his fellow Sect member spoke up after his question in a tone that made it clear Jingyi thought he was slow in his head and a fool.

,,Nothing too extreme and if they don't react at all we will stop."

,,Alright.."

The way Jingyi responded left it out in the open if he would actually stop. Not that the three knew if either of them would anyway.

,,Young master Jin.. I'm just going to ask to make sure.. Are you really alright with that? If it should work out, there won't be a going back.."

,,First of all, stop calling me like that. Second.. Even though there are a few questionable people in your Lan Sect.. Zewu-Jun is.. acceptable."

,,Acceptable?!"

Even though both of the Lan boys felt personally attacked by that way of phrasing it was Jingyi who blurted out a repeat of the word in a matching tone.. Who else should it have been really. After letting out a chuckle Jin Ling then spoke again.

,,It's so easy to offend you. On a more serious note though, Zewu-Jun is nice. He's calm and seems to have a good influence on my uncle."

With that the youngest of the 3 got up and dusted off his robes while fixing them.. The Lan boys quickly followed yet short before entering the dining hall Jingyi then paused and the other 2 did as well.

,,Now that we've gone that far and are planning to go even further.. Shouldn't we act like we're closer as well?"

The other two boys stared at him in confusion for a moment.. It was a bit of a lie to say they were "acting" close, not that any of them would admit that just yet though. At the end the first to understand, hold out his hand and speak was Sizhui.

,,A-Yuan."

,,A-Yi."

,,A-Lan."

,,Oh god.."

The second to join had been Jingyi who put his hand on his fellow sect members.. Jin Ling however, lost in the flow of the moment and honestly quite nervous since he had never gotten that close to anyone before, used his courtesy name name which.. resulted in Jingyi speaking in horror while the expressions of all of them then dirtorted matching to it. Not that anyone noticed his mishap of using his official instead of given name due to nervousness.

,,A-Ling.. Let's just.. Let's just go with A-Ling for now."

,,Yeh that.."

They all agreed and a moment later Jin Ling repeated his line while putting his hand on top of the others.

,,A-Ling."

A mere second before the awkwardness could've swallowed them whole they then pulled their hands back, nodded and made their way inside the now quite full dining hall.

~💙~

What the boys hadn't been able to see was that as Jiang Cheng had held the fruit in the air for his senior to take it.. They had stayed in this position for a short moment too long, the Jades gaze fixed on the younger ones fingers while just mentioned ones in turn was flickering up and down to Lan Xichen's lips and eyes. At the end the taller male had held his palm out so the other could drop the fruit in it, then awkward silence spread between them once more.

,,After the conversation we had, I worked on a few things yesterday.."

,,Mh.."

,,A few new rules.. or more altered already existing ones that I'll try to put in place soon.."

,,And?"

,,I also.. wrote a few letters to elders and sect leaders, which is why I wish to hold a small meeting after the meal."

,,Which is about?"

,,I wish to start educating the disciples of other sects again, this time as a joined project with Yunmeng Jiang."

It was the second time that Jiang Cheng turned towards the other, his expression hard to read, while the Lan Sect leader stuffed his mouth with some food to appear pre-occupied.

,,When did you plan to inform me about that?"

,,When do you plan to tell me what other options there are than to fool them tomorrow?"

The younger one had to give that point to the Jade, rubbing his temples he then gave in.

,,Mix yeast and yoghurt, a spoon of each and mix it well then take one before each drink.. that works, or drinking slowly.. another option would be eating a lot."

Lan Xichen looked as weirded out as one can be, yet he nodded silently before saying what Jiang Cheng had a right to hear as well.

,,I intended to tell you when everyone gets to know.. because I thought you wouldn't agree if I just said it or suggested it like that. The idea is that we will educate the junior disciples three months in Gusu, three in Yunmeng. Of course, how it is best for you will play a role in that.."


	118. Chapter 118

Jiang Cheng had to take and let out a heavy breath. He wasn't too upset but he did feel quite overwhelmed, to say the least. As he spoke up his tension was also quite audible.

,,I don't think I need to mention that you should've told me sooner? I honestly don't think my sect is on such a level again yet."

,,I knew you would disagree, because you don't believe in yourself being able to teach and work as a guide for the new generation, immediately."

The older one of them threw in, his tone gentle yet faintly heavy-hearted - the other in turn threw a bit of a glare at him as he chewed on a piece of meat that had tasted a lot better before Lan Xichen poked at his weaknesses.

,,I was just going to announce that I have this idea, or thought, in mind. Until it might be allowed a few weeks will pass, if it will even be allowed in the first place. Other than what you might think, I also planned to let the teacher of the classes go back and forth between the sects as well."

,,And who would teach in Gusu? You want me to host Lan Qiren out of all people?"

,,It would be me."

The Jade threw in that comment which made Jiang Cheng pause in his motions of picking up his cup of tea. Glancing over, the younger leader could see the other eat in silence with his expressions not giving away the intent he had, that they both knew at this point.

,,Why you? You're a sect leader."

,,Especially because I am the sect leader. It's a tradition within the Gusu Lan sect for mostly the leader to educate the new generations."

,,.... Then who taught them while you were.."

,,Wangji and my uncle. Depending on the ages of the students, Lan Sizhui as well."

After a pause Lan Xichen continued, the other only nodded in silence and both spoke in their usual tones.

,,I wish to let young master Jin participate in the meeting."

,,Why?"

,,Because it is rather possible that by the time where the study would start he would be active as the LanLing Jin sect leader already."

Jiang Cheng's food that already stopped tasting as good minutes ago.. now really.. tasted like trash. He didn't even notice how noticeable his displeasure was yet the Jade paused in his words and the process of picking up some rice with his chopsticks - unsure if he should say anything or not.

,,I see. Well, it might not be the worst idea to let the brat get some experience with meetings with that in mind."

Lan Xichen was just about to comment on the fact that Jin Ling had been present at quite a few sect meetings so far, even slightly turned towards the younger leader as almost out of nowhere.. they suddenly found themselves in a rather awkward position.

They hadn't heard the Juniors coming closer, only when a young voice let out a "Oh!" did Jiang Cheng turn.. while the Jade to bump forward against his chest.

,,A-Yi, you're such a damn idiot! Your shoes are drenched, it's slippery!"

,,Who are you calling an idiot, mistress?!"

Jin Ling was beside his uncle, Jingyi had "slipped and bumped on his ass", not so accidentally.. and after that they began to fight, almost acting as if they had arrived while fighting.. In the middle of them were trapped the moody Jiang Sect leader and the Lan's older Jade. With how the boys were leaning to push one another, let's just say the seniors didn't have much space to move - none at all actually.

Neither of the sect leader could move for more than the most obvious reasons. They had tensed, Jiang Cheng could feel the palms of the taller one against his chest while he had just so managed to not let their heads collide. Not that it changed much, they were too close and nowhere near finished with their more than private business.. which made taking in one anothers scent and the closeness quite unbearable.

,,You two, are you fucking done now?! If you continue acting this way none of you will eat another bite until you're home. And you, Jin Ling, do you want to turn yourself into a joke of a sect leader that bad?! And what an idiot are you even? And you call yourself a Lan?!"

The one born in Yunmeng finally managed to get those words out. The agitation that was audible that made the boys retreat and look down in - faked - shame however not caused by them all that much.

,,I'm sorry.."

Jin Ling and Jingyi said in an apologetic tone - if such thing would've been a matter in their world, they would've been the best of actors for sure. Sizhui appeared a moment later, with his parents and uncle just as Lan Xichen steadied himself again..

,,What is all this commotion about?"

,,It's none of your business, Wei Wuxian."

Jiang Cheng replied coldly, not taking note of the glare Lan Wangji threw at him for it as the married ones sat down. Only when the younger Jade saw the faint shade of red on his brothers face did he raise a brow - not that he'd ask though, he was the last to judge a terrible choice in men.

,,I forgot how slippery my shoes were and slipped up as I sat down.. We already apologised though, Hanguang-Jun, Senior Wei.."

Jingyi said.. it had been their unspoken plan, with Sizhui being part of initally but the oldest of the juniors had to pay them time with distracting the other 3 adults.

,,You're an idiot."

,,Sandu Shengshou said that as well.."

As Jingyi replied to the Patriarchs words in a defeated tone,.. Lan Wangji and Sizhui glanced at Wei Wuxian while Lan Xichen and Jin Ling glanced at Jiang Cheng - unsurprisingly the two former sworn brothers had tensed. To all of their surprise however, even Wei Wuxian's, Jiang Cheng went back to eating a moment later.


	119. Chapter 119

,,What the actual.. is with all of this food?"

,,It's sect leader Nie's gesture of apology for the incident with the meal earlier."

Lan Xichen replied as kindly as ever, even though he and Wei Wuxian were still.. on so, so terms.. Hearing those words, it was a tragedy that not more people witnessed the Patriarch's eyes widen, his entire expression lit up at the same time before he went about packing his plate and bowl with a lot of food.

Silence broke out within the round for a few minutes, not that Jingyi managed to be silent for more than 5-10 as he reached for a foreign fruit while speaking in complete and utter confusion.

,,Sizhui.. What is this? That looks poisonous.."

With everyone's attention shifting to him, for once, before Wei Wuxian could say a thing the Jiang Sect leader had reached out and taken a different colored one of the fruits - only three of those gathered at the table felt bad for Jingyi, yet didn't interrupt them.

,,That one's not ripe yet. Try this one."

The youngest of the Lan's should've really known that trusting Jiang Cheng after what just happened was the dumbest idea, at this point everyone had understood at least that much - yet of course Jingyi reached over and took the way too colorful something. Not without pushing the older Jade a tad closer to the one dressed in purple again.

Most gazes were by then so fixed on the poor Lan boy that no one saw the corner of the Jiang Sect leaders lips twitch repeatedly - Lan Xichen for sure noticed and had to hide his own behind his cup of tea as..

,,Eww.. Oh god.."

Within a second of having bitten on the foreign food, Jingyi barely managed to turn to the side to.. spit and curse and throw a fit of disgust.

,,I don't know what you've done wrong but.. If he goes that far, you probably earned your right to learn a lesson that hard of a way.."

Wei Wuxian admitted, leaning over the table to hand a cup of tea to the grossed out boy. Leaning back, Jingyi somewhat glared at the Jiang Sect leader who only then threw the less colorful fruit into his mouth before chewing on it with relish.

,,What the hell.. What is this?! So it's exactly the other way around and I actually had the right one of those damn fruits?!"

,,Jingyi. Language."

Lan Xichen tried to interefere before the situation quite probably would go out of control - to everyone's surprise though, Jiang Cheng spoke up in his usual tone, just a tad more amused and full of mockery.

,,For a Lan Sect cultivator your knowledge is really low. Hasn't anyone taught you to never pick or eat the most colorful of wild fruits?"

,,Oh.. Oh.. Oh no.. Don't tell me it's poisonous in that degree of ripeness.."

At this point 6 of the group weren't able to look at either of them anymore. They had ALL told Jingyi around the 100 times about that, not that Lan Xichen hadn't made the same mistake not that long ago. Even Lan Wangji felt somewhat embarrassed beneath his cold, unchanging surface - he was the only one actively eating while not letting go of his mental silencing spell.

,,It is extremely poisonous. You'll only be able to survive, maybe, if you sit still and don't say a word while eating for the next 15 minutes. That way your body will get rid of the poison all on its own."

Jingyi was actually enough of an idiot to believe the words that - to his defense - Jiang Cheng had said so seriously. At this point almost all of them were questioning a few things while at the same time trying not to burst out laughing.. because like a good boy, the youngest Lan went about doing as told.

After around 15 minutes of them all eating - and Wei Wuxian as well as Jiang Cheng drinking - in silence.. something happened that no one expected. The grumpiest of all sect leaders of that decade began to shake, his cup resting against his lips before he let out a short, neither low nor loud chuckle that didn't last for long but made them all stare at him as if they were about to faint.. Okay, Lan Xichen stared in a different manner, his heart beating a bit all over the place, yet no one noticed either - luckily.

,,W-What..??"

,,Boy, your idiocy tops even that of Nie Huaisang.. What an accomplishment in life.."

Jingyi was at a loss while Jiang Cheng smirked against his cup he downed in one go.

,,Congrats, you got my uncle to play a trick on you. Hell, you even made him laugh at your idiocy."

Jingyi's face went red as he heard Jin Ling speak for the first time in forever, his jaw dropped and eyes wide. Just to show off, in strange sync Jiang Cheng, Lan Xichen and Wei Wuxian leaned forward - each of them collecting one of the strange ripe fruits. The younger sect leader even picked up another one and casually threw it up in the air for his nephew to catch it just as casually.

,,Wait.. You all knew?!"

,,Who wouldn't have known at the latest where Sect leader Jiang told you that you could save yourself with your biggest weaknesses: sitting still and being silent?"

At the point where even Sizhui joined in, the youngest Lan got up from his seat within a second staring at all of them, yet his upset and betrayed gaze at the end got fixed on Jiang Cheng.. Who in turn only sat there, chewing on a piece of meat without giving the boy any attention until the latter spoke quite loudly while pointing at him.

,,You.. You.. I will refuse to call you Sandu Shengshou from now on, Sect leader Jiang.."

,,A-Yi.."

As hard as Sizhui had tried, he only got glared at from his old friend who then shifted his attention back to Jiang Cheng - who only then seemed to take note of him.

,,From now on.. I'll only refer to you as BianHua Shengshou!"

,,I apologise sect leader Jiang.. Jingyi is a bit-"

It was the first time in his life that Jingyi's adored Zewu-Jun had roughly pulled him around, or more precisely back onto the ground before turning to Jiang Cheng - Who however interrupted him with lifting one of his hands, his expression strangely calm and almost pleased.


	120. Chapter 120

,,Biàn.. As in change?"

,,Yeh, biàn as in: change, to alter, convert, transform, shift, become.. Or an unexpected turn."

Jingyi replied in a tone more full of annoyance than the confusion that also lingered - in truth, that lingered within all of them apart from Lan Xichen and Jiang Cheng. The latter even wore a strangely smug expression as his thumb stroked over Zidian.

,,Alright."

,,Alright? Wh-.."

,,Uncle.. I think you should go and get yourself checked by a doctor.."

,,Why?"

,,You simply saying alright to such thing? I think the hit to your head earlier-"

While even Wei Wuxian was at a loss of words by then, Jiang Cheng had been the first to reply to Jingyis words while the conversation then went on between the ones in purple and golden robes. It wasn't until Jiang Cheng reached out and patted Jin Ling's back in such an awkward reassuring manner that everyone backed away from Jiang Cheng - not Lan Xichen of course.

,,U-.. Uncle.. I.. Can you hand me Zidian for a moment..?"

Jin Ling half stuttered his words, expression on guard and almost horrified as the only two that went back to eating and weren't staring were the two sect leader. Jiang Cheng however looked up, his expression the usual accompanied from even a raised brow and the matching tone.

,,Why the hell would I? You're barely able to eat properly."

The youngest of the round blushed furiously as his uncle pointed with his chopsticks to a spot where he had dropped some sauce and quickly tried to cover his mishap up somehow.

,,T-.. That doesn't freaking matter right now. You're possessed from something, it can just be that.."

,,I'm not."

,,You are."

,,He's not, I can assure you, young master Jin."

After the nice and brief conversation Jin Ling had had with Lan Xichen, now not getting the needed support from the Lan Sect leader caused the boy to look at him in such a betrayed, childish way. Lan Xichen however leaned back a little as well, his smile as gentle and reassuring as always - which was the only reason why his own disciples then calmed down again as well. The two Lan boys had been silent, yet on guard and somewhat tense, also figuring the Jiang Sect leader must've some issues currently.

,,Just hand me Zidian already."

,,Jin Ling, Zidian isn't able to whip his main possessor."

Even though Wei Wuxian got a few impossible to read looks for that, as if out of a stubborn gesture - and to everyone's shock - Jiang Cheng did pull Zidian off of his finger and handed it over to his nephew. Jin Ling was confused, even more so as instantly Zidian emitted a purple light while wrapping around his next best finger - Zidian fitted perfectly, yet he felt strangely heavy. Due to how sudden all of that happened and because of how foreign it was however Jin Ling let out a noise of surprise, then went about wiggling his hand. The 2 Lan juniors stared at him wide eyed, more amazed about the over all situation while the seniors.. questioned how this boy was supposed to take over a sect soon in all honesty.

,,Stop wiggling your hand, you might make Zidian go out of control like that."

,,How am I supposed not to?! Why's it wrapping around my finger like that out of nowhere.."

,,I ordered Zidian to see you as his main possessor for the next 5 minutes."

It was only then that the boy in his golden robes stopped wiggling and stared wide eyed at his hand, then at his uncle - just like most others around them.

,,I don't want that.."

Jin Ling whined.. At the end he pulled and twisted his finger for the remaining 3 minutes before Jiang Cheng reached out and pulled Zidian off of his nephews finger again - And oh, how heavy of a relieved breath the boy let out.

,,Told you: Bianhua Shengshou."

Jingyi muttered, this time most had to bite on their lower lip due to both how accurate of a statement that was but also this completely lost, confused expression on the future LanLing Jin sect leaders face.

,,I have to admit, as dumb as you are - you aren't half as bad with name giving."

,,Not as bad as you and Jin Ling for sure.."

As low as Wei Wuxian said those words, he still got a warning glare from both of those he had adressed. Everyone around them had heard as well, yet no one dared saying another word as the situation at least did not escalate - Jiang Cheng and Jin Ling acting deaf due to their immense amount of pride.

,,How are we supposed to eat all of this.. and that with our 3 bowl limit.."

It wasn't like Sizhui at all to whine, but looking at the table he couldn't help but do so - also because he wanted to lighten up the atmosphere a little again.

,,If you keep silent about it you're allowed to eat to your hearts content. It would be worse to leave so much food behind to rot."

,,Zewu-Jun..!~"

The two Lan boys said loudly, in a swooning tone as if they had just fallen in love.. and not only them, Wei Wuxian had also joined. Jin Ling and Lan Wangji wore so "done" with it all expressions while Jiang Cheng once more smirked to himself behind his cup. This Lan Sect leader truly knew how to deal with his brats and win peoples h-.. no, no, he shouldn't think such thing.

Once they had gotten the permission to eat as much as they liked, even the loud Lan disciple grew silent. It was unclear how long they were eating, even more how they managed to not leave a thing on the table that was digestive.. yet by the time where the Juniors fell over on their backs, no one else remained in the dining hall other than their strange group of 7. Lan Xichen almost looked as if he was about to walk out to let it "out", with how he held his fist against his mouth - only Lan Wangji had sticked to his 3 bowls.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Biànhuà explanation:
> 
> Bianhua meaning "transformation, metamorphosis" was a keyword in both Daoism and Chinese Buddhism. Daoists used bianhua describing things transforming from one type to another, such as from a caterpillar to a butterfly. Buddhist translators used bianhua for Sanskrit nirmāṇa "manifest through transformations".
> 
> It can also mean the several words I let Jingyi say at the start of that chapter. I've been having the idea since a while with how the story is progressing and will continue to I might change Jiang Cheng's title to a less.. dark one. It'll turn more into a thing over time.
> 
> Also, I'm aware that Jiang Cheng is his birth name. Since no one ever uses his courtesy name tho, either because of lack of respect or other reasons, someone actually calling him Wanyin simply seems more intimate and like a bit of a boost for him.


	121. Chapter 121

,,I'm dead.."

Jingyi pressed out as he rubbed over his ready to explode stomach.. A few glances getting thrown at Wen Ning who hadn't said a word until then - not that anyone expected him to say what he went about saying in his toneless voice.

,,I doubt you are, young master Lan.. but I for sure am."

,,I.. I'm so sorry Senior Wen.."

Jingyi hurried to get those words out after flinching. In truth though, strangely enough, the two formerly sworn brothers from Yunmeng had to grit their teeth to not at least chuckle - that really had been quite the dark humour attack to their liking.

,,Are you even still able to recall what any of that once tasted like?"

,,Young master R-.. Young master Jin, that doesn't matter."

,,Can't anyone just answer my damned questions without always chickening the hell out with damn fucking excuses?!"

Jin Ling had asked quite respectfully, as Wen Ning replied with his head down however he tipped into his old behaviour for a moment - Only then did Wen Ning look up, and they all knew that with how Jiang Cheng ended up glaring at him that he looked at the younger sect leader for a reaction. Which he then got, in a arrogant and cold tone.

,,You can do at least that much for him, can't you?"

,,I am faintly able to recall anything such as tastes, scents or emotions. I don't crave anything however, nor am I truly able to feel unless the emotions are so strong that.. death doesn't matter."

Wen Ning's honest reply caused Wei Wuxian, Jiang Cheng and even Jin Ling to have this bitter taste in their mouth. While Wei Ying felt hatred towards himself for putting his friend in that position, Jiang Cheng felt hatred for himself because he couldn't hate the other as much - neither of them. Jin Ling however, as much as he sometimes secretly wished for his parents being in Wen Ning's situation, just so he could have them by his side, felt terrible that someone was put in that position.

,,Alright. That's enough. Zewu-Jun, you still have to make an announcement."

Jiang Cheng then broke the new wave of silence after around a minute - Lan Xichen however sat there in such an awkward position, the discomfort from how full he was barely hidden.. full in more than one way, which now really got to him.

,,Mh?"

,,Announcement."

,,Oh.. Right.."

It was a moment that no one present at the table would forget, the confused "coming back around" way of reacting from the usually more than perfect older Lan brother. Stiffening back up, Lan Xichen cleared his throat and spoke while a slightly awkward version of his usual smile played on his lips.

Needless to say that for a short second the three juniors thought there'd be SUCH an announcement.

,,So, after thinking about something yesterday, I made the decision that I want to hold a brief sect meeting once we've all.. recovered from this buffet."

,,Did something happen?"

,,No, don't worry. I wish for Nie Huaisang to attend, alongside Wangji, young master Wei and.. young master Jin."

While the Lan boys went all fidgety - and of course Jingyi was the one to speak up - Jin Ling almost spit out the tea he had just poured into his mouth.

,,Me?! Why me?! No.. Why only me?!"

,,First of all, because I want you to be the youths representative after comparing the thoughts the three of you have written within your essays. Second-"

,,Your spoiled ass is going to sit in a really umfortable leader position real soon and by the time where the idea might turn into reality you certainly will already be nailed to your seat. Appreciate the chance we give you and the chance of being a kid for some time longer due to the idea."

This all had come so out of nowhere that Jin Ling could only go bright red in the face, eyes and mouth wide open unable to even make a bratty comment.

,,Congrats."

Wei Wuxian said in an equally as amused as teasing tone as he quickly got up and pulled Lan Wangji after himself so that they were out of the messy zone already.

,,Please arrive in my room in one hour."

,,Alright, Zewu-Jun.. well, maybe!~"

The last comment Wei Wuxian let out before they were gone got most to sigh and Jiang Cheng to roll his eyes.

,,We appreciate the thoughtfulness, Zewu-Jun!"

The Lan boys said, they had - together with Wen Ning - already gathered beside the Lan Sect leader who bowed his head and smiled as sweetly as always at them.

,,Brat, go - get changed. I'm not motivated to have all the Jin's at my throat in case you catch a cold."

,,As if I would! No, forget it. Now I'll get sick on purpose."

Before Jiang Cheng could give anything back to that, now again bratty, statement of his nephew just mentioned one was already up and after his friends in the speed of light.. The last thing both of the sect leader were able to hear was Jin Ling yelling. Yelling something specific that made them both tense due to different yet so obvious reasons.

,,Senior Wen! A-Yi! A-Yuan! Wait for me you three.."

And there the voice of the boy in his father's golden robes died down - while neither of the leaders moved for a few minutes, nor said a word.


	122. XiCheng | 80

,,The Wen kid really grew up well, huh?"

Jiang Cheng couldn't say those words out loud without his tone being bitter and full of displeasure - That the Jade faintly flinched, or maybe momentarily tensed, beside him didn't make it all that much better.

,,I.."

,,Don't even try to tell me he's not. Do you think I'm that dumb?"

,,... I would never say such a thing."

,,I know a few things. First of all, I had seen the kid several times. Second, the news about your unbearable brother having adopted a kid spreading at such a time.. Apart from that, the entire name situation that is going on.."

Lan Xichen didn't say a word, he was tense.. not really on guard, yet not letting his guard down either. Jiang Cheng however, even while rubbing with his thumb over Zidian, remained calm for his usual self.

,,You knew of the possible risks, I hope."

,,The possible risk of him one day remembering and turning against us? Maybe turning into.. into a second Jin GuangYao? Acting nice until he has everything under his control in case I fail to produce a heir?"

,,So you did."

The older ones voice was.. sounding rather strange, it was clear that he hadn't gone through those lines for the first time in his life just now. Jiang Cheng then let out a heavy breath, shifting into a bit more of a comfortable position. As Lan Xichen spoke up again his tone wasn't as sweet as honey anymore. He sounded angry, yet strangely sad at the same time.

,,Wangji took his punishment for all he has done.. For being human.-"

,,Unless the boy does anything wrong, I won't do anything to him."

Hearing that, noticing that the younger leaders tone was less.. agitated as well, the Jade turned - He was unable to scan the others face though to see if he was being honest due to Jiang Cheng already having picked up the liquor jar that he took quite the gulp from.

,,You don't mind?"

,,It's not that I don't mind.. From all your disciples I've seen so far.. he's the most Lan like, I don't even know what's going on with that other kid like.. sorry but that one's really gone out of control."

,,Ehm.."

,,Embarrassed?"

,,Stop changing the topic, Jiang Wanyin!"

Lan Xichen was in fact embarrassed, as hard as they had tried they just couldn't tickle out the Lan within Lan Jingyi.. He grew even more flustered as the one born in Yunmeng looked at him with a raised brow while teasing further.. Which only caused Jiang Cheng to let out a chuckle.

,,Honestly.. What the hell am I supposed to do? Mh, Huan? A-Ling never had a single friend. He has lost both, his parents and his uncle.. Even his dog is nothing but a shit memory holder now. I'm a selfish ass, yeh. I agree. But I'm not going to fuck that up for him now, nor am I going to start a war between our sects for a Wen kid."

There were three things that confirmed for the Lan Sect leader that the younger male was drunk. One: He'd never call his nephew like that usually. Two: His tone and expression were.. let's just say quite gentle and close to his bedroom one. And number three: This heavy Yunmeng dialect appearance. - Not that Lan Xichen would point at any of those facts, especially with himself being sober this entire situation had something.

,,What?"

,,Nothing."

Jiang Cheng eyed him up and down suspiciously, yet the Jade smiled his usual sweet one and felt his heart skip a beat as the other went about stroking his bangs out of his face.

,,He's still looking at the kid the same way.."

If it wouldn't have been so clear through the way the smaller male said those words and how he went about shaking his head in pure disbelief that he was accidentally talking out loud to himself.. Lan Xichen probably wouldn't have went about looking around before speaking in a luring like tone.

,,BianHua Shengshou?~"

,,Mh?"

The moment Jiang Cheng had turned his head, the wild god had already gotten a hold of the back of it and pressed their lips together. It was another bad decision of Lan Xichen, yet keeping his senses on max the kiss soon turned into a hungry type of devouring one another. Even a hand of the younger one ended up grabbing onto the white Gusu Lan Sect's robes.

As they finally broke the kiss, they were both breathless but foreheads still pressed against the others for a few moments longer.. Before Jiang Cheng then quickly let go and turned back around, his tone rather quiet and if the Jade would've to make a guess he was probably flustered - In a Jiang Cheng way.

,,Idiot.. Stop bringing up the unfinished business between us until we have the time.. Are you that unable to calm your inner demons for a minute?"

,,Inner demons? Who's is the visible ones here, A-Cheng?~"

It was the saddest of facts that not more people had seen the oh so terrible Sandu Shengshou put his arm over his lap in an instant. In truth, the Lan Sect leader hadn't even been able to see a thing, not that it made the comfirmation any less sweet. To the Jade, drunk Jiang Cheng was nothing but a cute boy - One he'd really like to play with some more.

,,How am I supposed to tame mine if all I can do is feel you.. smell you.."

Lan Xichen whispered ever so sweetly and seductively into the unmoving drunkards ear, he had gotten up at this point and really didn't feel much like stopping at all even as Jiang Cheng spoke up in a terrible attempt at a threatening tone.

,,I swear, if you don't stop I'm gonna bend you over and fuck you right here and now."

,,Oh..~ Isn't it more the other way around you'd like to have, A-Cheng..? Me spoiling you and caressing each part of your body.."

Before the Jiang Sect leader could even sort his mind out enough to throw back a reply the older one had already smirked to himself. He had perfectly seen the arm applying more pressure onto a certain area and quickly turned. As Lan Xichen walked off, ever so elegantly, he simply spoke a few more words in a louder, normal tone.

,,I'll see you soon at the meeting, Sect Leader Jiang."

Jiang Cheng wasn't able to get up for the next 20 minutes. Even drunk he hated that he got played from his lover each time and made the drunken decision that drinking more was the right solution. - Lan Xichen arrived back in his room to once again question where on earth this side of him came from and why he was behaving in such sadistic ways.. because to him this little game already was nothing but that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm already going to say sorry for the shorter update, life has been stressful but we're slowly reaching the end of the first of possible 3 parts of this fic universe!


	123. Chapter 123

While the two seniors that remained in the dining hall, the junior trio that was again accompanied by Wen Ning went back to Jin Ling's room. They were quite a bit fidgety about the fact that their opinions were so officially taken into account.. Only the youngest of them that had grown taller than the oldest, Lan Sizhui, by then was a bit.. pale faced, to say the least.

,,Miss-.. I mean.. A-Ling.. You.. You'll manage it."

,,What the heck kind of encouragement's that supposed to be?!"

While Jin Ling responded in his usual, from genetics caused, tsundere manner - it would be a lie to say that the statement of his least favourite Lan friend didn't reassure him at all. The two poor other guys that always got caught up in the middle were meanwhile standing there rather speechless.

It was only when Jin Ling went to one of his many bags and came back with a certain something that the Lan Sect disciples for once both grew silent while Wen Ning spoke up in his usual awkward manner.

,,Young master.. Is that..?"

,,Mh.. It's the only official piece of a leader robe I have right now.."

The youngest said as he stared at the item in his hand. After that they spend most of the time discussing their ideas once again before the youngest accompanied by the other 3 made himself on the way to Lan Xichen's room.

~💙~

To Wei Wuxian's displeasure the two hour break hadn't ended or taken shape how he wanted. No matter how he tried to tease his husband, nor how often he.. looked at Lan Wangji, ironically enough, with puppy eyes - all he got was a "Later".

While later was better than never,.. Later was still not now.

At some point Lan Wangji then clearly had enough as he went about shifting their conversation to the hottest topic that was currently existing: Jin Ling at their little meeting. Not that Wei Wuxian, even though having said they needed to communicate more, did so just yet.

,,It is the right choice.. The new generations matter and Jin Ling.. He has really grown a lot.."

There was melancholic like pain audible in the younger ones voice and visible on the strangers face - yet for once Wei Wuxian didn't even feel like speculating about what Zewu-Jun had so urgent to converse about once Lan Wangji had turned the topic in that direction.

~💙~

The first to arrive in the Lan Sect leaders private chambers was of course the drunken one that had previously been asked to bring a night robe with him. It wasn't like Jiang Cheng entirely understood, but he also couldn't deny at all that it more than likely meant something "remotely exciting and pleasurable" would happen. Hell was he a liar.

,,So.. Who's gonna sit where?"

The younger leader asked as he looked at the semi sized table with a conflicted expression. No matter how he tossed and turned the possibilities, they all seemed like rather bad options.

,,You could sit on my lap, if you wish."

As quick as Jiang Cheng glared at his senior, as quick did he look away. His cheeks had tinted a faint shade of light pink as he clicked his tongue - Meanwhile Lan Xichen seemed quite innocent but pleased with himself. A moment later the Jade then spoke up more seriously.

,,Even if it might be to my brother's displeasure, I personally would choose to put Sect Leader Nie in between of them. If we go with the correct order I could either sit across from you, or Nie Huaisang and either of you then beside me. After the leader Wangji and Jin Ling, then young-"

Putting his fist in front of his mouth, Lan Xichen cleared his throat without finishing what he had clearly intended to say. Jiang Cheng remained silent for a bit, then spoke in a more mature and leader like tone himself.

,,Ignoring my private issues.. I think it would be best to put Jin Ling beside Nie Huaisang. He shouldn't feel pressured by sitting beside me, as his role in that moment is not to be my nephew but his sects leader. Your brother, you - Zewu-Jun - and I have the most experience. Apart from that we both know and your brother wouldn't go against your wish."

As he glanced over, the Lan Sect leader wore a smile he couldn't categorise as he nodded with his head half turned towards Jiang Cheng.

,,I think it would be the best choice to let Jin Ling sit across from you. After that you're free to choose if you wish for your brother or me to sit beside you."

,,I understand.. I think it would be an unlucky choice to neither make enough nor too much of a distance between you and young master Jin.. As long as you will behave, you are free to sit beside me. Sect leader Nie across from you and then.. Wangji across from the young master."

Even though Jiang Cheng had been about to snap something back for the "If you will behave" part, as the taller male went about talking like that again he went about running his hand over his face.

,,You see. As much as I appreciate you trying to avoid bringing him up, Zewu-Jun.. I won't be able to avoid him forever. Neither in a few minutes, nor if this wild idea of yours goes through. In general I wasn't-"

,,Mh?"

,,Nothing."

"In general I wasn't the one who ran last time. In general I actually wanted to talk to him, make up." - Jiang Cheng hadn't yet changed enough to say those words out loud. He couldn't admit it just yet even as the Jade looked at him half worried and half curious. The one born in Yunmeng could hear the soft sigh of his lover though, followed from a gentle as always sounding.

,,Alright. Whenever you may feel like talking Wanyin. Now, take a seat."

Not long after they had this conversation almost everyone arrived at once. While Nie Huaisang really looked like he was about to have an accident in his pants because he had to sit across of Jiang Cheng.. Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji seemed faintly displeased about having to sit in front of one another instead of beside - or on top of.


	124. Jin Ling's First "Official" Sect Meeting | 1

Jiang Cheng had already began to grow tense, his fingers tapping onto the table as the last to show up for sure had to be his brat of a nephew. Why his boy of all people? Once Wei Wuxian & Lan Wangji had been let in and directed to their seats, just as Lan Xichen had half sat back down there was laughter audible - coming from right in front of his chambers door.

While the two Jade's and Wei Wuxian each felt awkward in their own way, recognising the laughter instantly, Jiang Cheng - even drunk - couldn't help that his old habit of rolling his eyes popped back up. And sure enough, as Lan Xichen went about opening the door, Jin Ling was standing there with Jingyi laughing at him and before the boy could even shut his trap he had already blurted his next words out.

,,That's so weird.. You in that formal attire, young Mistress.."

,,Jingyi."

,,Zewu-Jun, there's no need. We have more important matters to deal with, right?"

To literally everyone's surprise, even though the boy in his golden robes was grabbing the handle of his father's sword, he spoke in a rather calm and mature tone. Jin Ling didn't even waste time, nor pay attention to how others reacted to his behaviour as he already turned, bowed to the Lan Sect leader in respect and walked past him - Only then did he hesitate as it was unclear where he was supposed to sit.

As dumbfounded as his seniors were, not only because he was wearing his sects headpiece but also everything combining, they all straightened themselves and bowed - No exception being made. At the end, after a moment of visibly debating, the youngest of them chose the correct seat all on his own before putting his headpiece down in front of him.

,,You'll do great and we believe in you. Zewu-Jun, Hanguang-Jun, Sect leader Jiang, Sect leader Nie, Senior Wei.. if you would excuse us now,.. I will try to keep a certain someone under control."

,,I would appreaciate that."

Jin Ling replied before any of his seniors even had the chance to, his tone quite unchanging. Meanwhile, even though Sizhui already had him at the back of his collar, Jingyi still couldn't stop himself from a small tease.

,,Look at that switch in character.. We maybe should really adopt him as a sworn brother, huh?"

,,You'd wish for that to happen. Either way, are you going to leave today still without causing further interruptions or have you already forgotten everything we have talked about before?"

Even though he was a lot calmer at the end, there were clear hints of Jiang Cheng popping through in the boy. His pride, how respectful he was to those that deserved it, but even more so the clear dominance that could go out from him now where he was as tall and almost an adult. Glancing at him with a raised brow, this time Jingyi rolled his eyes because of it before retreating in silence. Poor Sizhui let out an awkward chuckle, his expression matching as he had been the one to leave the final words of encouragement for the youngest a few moments earlier.

Nie Huaisang had meanwhile began to sweat behind his quickly moving fan - He had done bad things, but why did he have to sit across Jiang Cheng and right beside Jin Ling who seemed to have.. quite the pressuring character as well?

Lan Xichen stood there for a moment longer before he cleared his throat. All the seniors then blinked to themselves as the Lan Sect leader went about closing the door before sitting down. Clearing his throat once more, the oldest of them then directed his next few sentences in a leader like yet still gentle tone at the young man - which they all willingly or not had to agree Jin Ling was at this point - who looked at him with attentiveness, respect yet.. a look that gave away he wouldn't buy just anything someone would sell him. Not after what happened with his deceased uncle.

,,Are you aware of how a general sect meeting works, Sect Leader Jin?"

,,I am.. however, I would like to bring up an idea I had."

After most of the seniors blinked, half in confusion and half weirdly irritated, Lan Xichen then made a "Go ahead" like gesture with his hand to which the boy nodded in respect.

,,As far as I know, it was until now common to let every sect leader participate in a meeting until the end. Even it they don't agree with the ideas that get discussed, which often times lead things to not end well - Am I correct so far?"

Thinking about it, to their embarrassment the boy really came for them. They had lost count of how many times things got openly discussed in front of people with clearly questionable intent, or even when they didn't want to participate in whatever the other sects wanted to do. Due to that, the Lan Sect leader replied in a matching flustered like tone.

,,That is correct, Sect Leader Jin."

,,Since I can somewhat at least guess what this meeting is about.. I would like to propose the idea to simply let everyone vote right in the beginning of the meeting for whether or not they want to participate. With most discussions in a sect meeting, one doesn't need to know all the details to decide whether or not they want to be a part of it. Why should they first get to know all the details already, to then decide - and possibly turn- against it?"

In all honesty, none of the adults expected the youngest to come for them like that. Not with so much logic, maturity and so bluntly either.

,,Even though it is unconventional, I must say this idea is not bad."

It wasn't overly like Lan Wangji to say a lot, even less due to the more or less game of letting a boy who wasn't yet an official sect leader act like it. However, they all felt a.. strange proudness.

,,Alright."

Jiang Cheng then also agreed, his tone the usual - even though it was overly strange to "cut" the obvious blood ties in that moment in time to his nephew.

,,Do you also agree, Sect Leader Nie?"

,,I.. I do."

,,I'm not a sect leader whatsoever but I have to say that that's one of the most logical things that anyone ever said in one I was present at."

The one to ask Nie Huaisang was Lan Xichen. The headshaker stuttered nervously as always yet Wei Wuxian replied as hyper as always and the Lan Sect Leader simply nodded.


	125. Jin Ling's First "Official" Sect Meeting | 2

,,Alright, I agree as well. Now to come to the reason for this sect meeting. I wish to restart the schooling the Gusu Lan sect had for generations for Juniors of different Sects. Think carefully if you want to hear more. And also about your sects current situations and so forth before you decide if you want to hear more or not."

As surprised Wei Wuxian, Lan Wangji and Nie Huaisang were about this - the other two had somehow almost gathered that this would be a possibility, or well Jiang Cheng knew - his nephew had "gathered" or "guessed". The next few minutes were spend in silence.. Jiang Cheng had almost agreed, yet like Nie Huaisang and Jin Ling he was unsure if he could "show off" his disciples in such a way.. The first three to lift their hands were Lan Xichen, Wei Wuxian and then Lan Wangji. Even though they didn't say it out loud, the other three then lifted their hands as well for the same reason: If anything, they could truly need some guidance and apart from that.. their disciples could learn a lot more than from them probably - at least Jin Ling and Nie Huaisang knew that.

,,Is there anyone who openly wants to state their reasoning for voting to take part in this idea? There won't be judgement for it."

,,Since I am quite young and since I soon have to take over the LanLing Jin sect.. It is a welcome oppurtinity for me to maybe accompany my future disciples. I can learn a lot still, just like them. Apart from that.. it would be an honor for me to have my first action as a sect leader be to take part in this for generations active tradition."

,,Well said, Sect leader Jin."

Even though he had kept his pokerface up until that point, as Jiang Cheng said those few words the boy had to turn his head due to a not so faint blush covering his face.

,,It is a decision we should have made a long time ago."

Was all Lan Wangji said before his husband then spoke up in a bit of a mature tone for once.

,,If I would be able to turn back the time I would wish to change how I behaved when I had the oppurtunity to study in Gusu. For the new generations, that isn't only an honor but they can take a lot with themselves from it. It would also bring the sects closer again and maybe.. The sects will change themselves as well."

,,I think this is something we can all somewhat agree with, young master Wei. None of our sects is perfect, or even at a level from many years ago. We all can learn, we all have things we need to change."

The older Jade said those few words which ended this part of the meetings conversation. Some were surprised, yet no one could disagree.

,,I wish to reveal the fact however that this won't be a Gusu Lan only year of study. Sect leader Jiang and I have decided that we will make this a joined project, where the disciples will spend either half the time in Gusu Lan and Yunmeng Jiang.. Or depending on how it might work out in a 3 months here and 3 months there pattern."

It was only at this point that all apart from the two that knew about this fact froze - each in their own way. Some were scared for their disciples, others simply tense because.. Jiang Cheng was Jiang Cheng after all.

,,Sizhui will definitely need some medicine against his seasickness or else he won't survive that at all."

,,I will make sure that anything necessary will be prepared to ensure not only everyone's safety but also their over all well-being on the journey's from one sect to another. I think the same counts for Sect Leader Jiang as well."

,,No one will be harmed. Everything will run as Zewu-Jun has said, I will also make sure that this is the case. If anyone should be unable to do something, such as swimming, then there are enough of my disciples who could help another learn it."

Jin Ling hadn't expected such replies to his half mocking half honestly worried words, yet he got exactly such replies - especially the speech from Jiang Cheng made them all question again if he wasn't possessed by something.

,,Who will teach?"

,,I will be the teacher in Gusu Lan, Sect leader Jiang will take over the role in Yunmeng Jiang since I also need to learn most things from there myself still. However.. and this might be a bit more tricky to overcome - I wish for you, young master Wei, to teach the disciples - realistically - how demonic cultivation works."

,,Brother.."

Lan Wangji interrupted the Lan Sect leader at this point, yet his brother did so in turn as well as they all stared at him in pure disbelief with lifting his hand and a reassuring smile.

,,I do not intend to let young master Wei teach them how to cultivate the dark path. I intend for the disciples to get to know, from the person who knows the most, how the creations of his that are in use nowadays still have to be handled. There have also been several essays written by our disciples that proved that he knows how to teach them what to look out for and so forth. I doubt that young master Wei would teach them how to use his way of doing things himself and instead he would be able to tell them exactly why they should not go this path."

Silence broke out within the Nie Sects guest room. No one really knew what to say, they were all shocked in their own ways. Giving them a few minutes, Lan Xichen got up and prepared several cups of tea as the first to speak up again turned out to be Jin Ling.

,,I have to admit that he has helped us a lot when it came to understanding a few things. Not only in Yi-City but in night hunts as well. I would never walk his path.. but he has even helped Jingyi overcome his fear of ghosts and all of that almost entirely by now, due to his.. close bond to the strange things."


	126. Jin Ling's First "Official" Sect Meeting | 3

,,I assume you're trying to make the younger generation aware of the negative points of this crooked path without forbidding it because what is forbidden is more likely to tempt someone into trying to attempt using it themselves?"

,,Exactly."

Lan Xichen responded, putting the first two cups down in front of Nie Huaisang and Jin Ling. It was the first time since a while that Jiang Cheng couldn't drown out the displeasure that was audible as well as his bitterness even though he understood.

,,As someone who has lived in Gusu Lan my entire life.. I have seen many things happen because matters are simply forbidden without even the negative and positive points about it taken into account or discussed - which leads innocent people to do all those matters thinking that it might not be as bad and similar trains of thought."

,,I can assure you, I would be the last person to sell my way of living as a great thing. I would never lure someone into walking the same single-pledged path."

,,I think we all know that, young master Wei. If you would've wished for that to happen already many years ago you could've easily done so."

Lan Xichen had to admit that, just like Jiang Cheng.. even though it either way didn't sit well with them both. The Lan Sect leader had sat back down at this point as Wei Wuxian spoke up again while staring at his cup.

,,If someone like Xue Yang would've been taken in from a different person, and given a lecture about why my path shouldn't be walked on.. Many things may not have happened. He was a kid that got lured in with a fast and easy way to earn both recognition and strength after living on the road for many years. It is better to warn than to forbid and lure people in with them having no knowledge."

,,Most of those I have encountered over the years that walked this crooked path didn't even know what the fuck they were doing. They heard it was easy to get strong like that and jumped on it. They were nothing but uneducated idiots."

Jiang Cheng then admitted after silence had broken out between them again before Jin Ling then spoke up shortly after his uncle.

,,All the tools he created are categorised as evil as well, meanwhile they are actually quite useful even though they need to be.. re-done."

,,Stop bullying my half-assed compass. It was a basic model, not even a finished product."

,,Then stop half-assing and wasting time and do something proper for once."

The little situation between Wei Wuxian and Jin Ling unfolded like that before Lan Xichen cleared his throat and they both stopped. As they had calmed down the older Jade spoke up again.

,,Are there any more questions from any of you?"

,,I.. I have one.. How many disciples are expected to be send?"

,,Honestly, with how little skill yours will probably have one should make up for the help necessary for 5."

,,3-5.. If any of the sects cannot send as many or does not wish to, a place for a disciple from a smaller sect will be held free."

Ignoring the shade Jiang Cheng had thrown at Nie Huaisang the Lan Sect leader replied - and the words he said caught Jin Ling's attention.

,,Can we possibly, in case a spot remains free, invite Ouyang Zizhen? He's really getting held down by his father and is supposed to take over the Baling Ouyang Sect one day as well. I'm certain that he would truly appreciate such an oppurtunity more than most others."

,,The kid that stood up against his dad and didn't want to go back home that one time?"

Jiang Cheng questioned with a raised brow, more an uncle like than leader response and as his nephew nodded he chuckled and simply said.

,,That one kid more or less really won't kill either of our sects budgets nor get our classroom's to overflow."

,,Anything else someone wishes to say or ask?"

,,How much time do we have to pick the disciples that will be send?"

,,I have to be honest and say that it can take a while before our elders might agree. It could take as few as 12 weeks to maybe a whole year. I tend to think you will have at least three months to pick and keep a critical eye on your juniors, Sect leader Jin."

,,Is it a problem if I wish to attend as a student as well?"

,,It should not be one on our end, yet I am unsure how it is for your sect since you will be a new leader at this point more than likely."

,,It would be in my sects interest to have me study more and make such an experience especially because of that, wouldn't it?"

No one could argue anything from the conversation that went on between Jin Ling and the Lan Sect leader.

,,I think so as well, but I cannot speak for your sect."

,,I doubt they're going to keep that chance from you."

Jiang Cheng then threw in - again not so professionally sect leader to sect leader like.. for which he got a bit of a glare from Jin Ling.

,,If.. If there's anything my sect can help you with.. please let me know.."

Nie Huaisang spoke up, as hesitant and unsure like as always. By now honestly no one knew anymore if this entire thing was now an act again or not - However, the other two official sect leader spoke up at almost the same time.

,,We will keep that in mind."

Ignoring the somewhat confused looks from those surrounding them, Jiang Cheng finished off his tea while the oldest of them finished off the meeting.

,,If there are no further questions at this point than this is the end of this meeting. You are free to keep thinking about additions and so forth, yet due to sect leader Jin's new meetings strategy you are unable to decide against it still. Now then, if you would excuse us, Sect Leader Jiang and I have a few matters to discuss still."

The only one that found this mildly fishy was the youngest of them, yet as all others as well as Lan Xichen got up and bowed in respect before leaving - Jin Ling was also doing so, or more about to as his uncle spoke up out of nowhere and he froze.

,,You've done good, brat."

,,I agree with Sect Leader Jiang. You were surprisingly professional, even mildly overpowering. You knew what you wanted and you put just enough pressure onto us old hands to get it. It is also worthy of respect that you made sure to mention your friend of another sect and try to get him a chance to take part in this tradition as well."

Fiddling with his sects headdress the boy in his golden robes couldn't look at either of them. One, he knew his uncle wasn't looking at him - two, he felt this.. this warm stare of the Lan Sects older Jade cover him like some cozy blanket and it made him feel so.. awkward that his face went as red as his father's many years ago.

,,Whatever."

Blurting that out in a rather quiet yet somewhat bratty tone the boy then pretty much ran off and while that prompted Jiang Cheng to roll his eyes - Lan Xichen let out the sweetest of chuckles, watching for a moment longer before he closed the door.


	127. WangXian | 4

Wei Wuxian was strangely quiet on the married couples way back to their room. He didn't look down, yet Lan Wangji knew him well enough even in this altered body by then to know his other half was.. lost in thought. He got his guess confirmed then as they entered their room and instead of going straight to the bedroom or sexually assaulting him in an instant the younger one of them rather went and grabbed a jar of liquor before sitting down.

,,Wei Ying.. What are you thinking about?"

It was only when they were alone that the taller male spoke with pauses at times. He mostly called out the others name first, then went about asking or saying whatever else - almost as if he wanted to make sure Wei Wuxian knew those words were directed at him and him alone. This time, it wasn't like Lan Wangji had no idea what his husband was thinking about - there were simply too many possibilities for him to know for certain what it was.

,,A lot.. I can't quite get a clear thought together though, Lan Zhan.."

,,I will prepare a bath, maybe that will help."

,,That's never a good idea with us, isn't it?"

Even though Wei Wuxian chuckled and poked at their - more his husbands - usual accidents during baths, his grin didn't overtake the clouded, a tad gone out look in his eyes. Letting out an inaudible sigh, Lan Wangji didn't respond - there was no need to - and simply went about doing as he had said.

They had to give the Nie Sect one thing, they really had nice smelling bathing supplements. Within a few minutes only of Lan Zhan being away, the smell began to spread throughout the entirety of their apartment like guestroom and it calmed them both.

,,Wei Ying."

,,What, did you slip and fall?"

The younger one couldn't help but shout that back as he made his way to the bathroom, swinging his almost empty jar of liquor in his hand.. To his pleasant surprise, his husband was already in the water - naked, an arm stretched out for him to be able to join without falling over.

,,Oh~ My Er-Gege.. you don't really think that that is a good idea..~"

Ignoring the tempting way in which Wei Wuxian went about peeling off his many layers, and to the stripping ones surprise the Jade replied in a quite normal yet decisive tone.

,,This is not about me."

,,We both know that my entire life is about you.~"

The smaller male gave back as he stepped into the water and sat down on the lap that even in a strangers body he really felt like he was made to sit on for.

,,Turn around."

,,I don't want to, I can't look at you then, Lan Zhan..~"

,,Wei Ying."

As much as he pouted, when the Jade kept being the way he currently was.. well, letting out a defeated noise Wei Wuxian gave in, got back up, turned and sat back down. It wasn't like he disliked the turned riding position, but.. after such long abstinence he didn't favour the idea.

,,And now?"

,,Lean back. Relax."

,,I really don't understand why you're so talktative out of nowhere.."

For a moment the younger one could've sworn that his other half chuckled inaudibly, yet again.. he let it slide and did as told. Not even a minute later the hands of the Jade began to travel over Wei Wuxians body.. while one went up, two fingers skillfully teasing one of the quickly hardening nubs of the former Patriarch it was the destination of the other that got Wei Ying to tense and blurt out.

,,What are you doing..? Lan Zhan, that's not necessary, let's just.."

Lan Wangji had already wrapped his hand around the others length, tending to it rather slowly with his grip not being overly tight. They both felt it, they both needed an equally short amount of time to grow erect, yet it was Wei Wuxian who couldn't even finish his words because of how desperate he was for the touch of his husband.

,,We are ignoring your needs too much."

,,What..? You always make sure.. to make me cum first.. or that we cum together.."

,,That part."

,,Mh?"

Only a few minutes had passed before the older male spoke up, his tone lower and the sound of his voice giving away that he was calm yet also in need for relief.. He however, ignored his needs, even as his husband could do nothing more than to moan a questioning hum.

,,Are you usually satisfied?"

,,What?!-"

,,Do not move."

Of course, the Patriarch had tried to turn around.. yet as his lover forbid him to do so, he paused and then spoke up in this shaky and quite confused tone.

,,Where.. does that suddenly come from, Lan Zhan?"

Lan Wangji wasn't used to have to say a lot. His family never taught him that "not talking" wouldn't always result in others understanding him.. It wasn't like he was unable to talk, like he was lacking the words, he simply never had to talk and whenever he had to do so now after more than 30 years, it was a struggle to communicate properly - or a lot at once.

,,We are the same. You were not born for "that"."

,,I'm fine.. I really am.."

,,Are you afraid of something, Wei Ying?"

,,Scared..? Why should I be..? You're not making any sense, Er-Gege.."

,,.."

The older one of the couple needed to take a break from the conversation.. He had to figure out how to continue it to bring his point across, since Wei Wuxian either didn't seem to understand - or he was acting dumb on purpose.

,,You never touch yourself."

,,I do.."

,,Not like that."

It had been an assumption until then from the Jade. He had always guessed that maybe when he wasn't around, that his other half would tend to his male instincts when he was alone. Touching his front, maybe fantasising about what Lan Wangji had naturally fantasized about since the first time his sexual need awakened.


	128. WangXian | 5

If their roles would be reversed, Lan Wangji would by then have picked his lover up, carried him to the bed and pinned him down. It was only now that he realised how far off of the "natural male trail" Wei Wuxian had gotten. The younger one was moaning, yet he was tense - far too tense -, there were no natural thrusting motions happening, not even the faintest hint of them.. and apart from that, he was far too sensitive to the touch, his endurance as low as it could probably be.

I wasn't like Lan Wangji had ever really thought about switching roles while making love either. From the first time on, he had imagined it the way it had ended up always running between them - him on top, Wei Ying enjoying himself.. but thinking about it now, could he really be enjoying himself fully if he never did what his "male life purpose" was? Thinking about it now, the Jade knew that he himself wouldn't be entirely satisfied, as much as he loved his other half - it was just.. almost unimaginable for him to never feel what he did, to never use his body how he was naturally supposed to.. and even more, to never do so in the first place. Sure, he had spend far over 13 years tending to himself, but this and that were things of such difference that it couldn't possibly be compared.

,,Lan Zhan.. I.."

Just like during the few times where the older one of them had used his mouth.. How much time had passed? Maybe 10 minutes, maybe even less, before Wei Wuxian tensed and trembled as the thick, sticky build up already spilled into the water, in short yet large waves. His endurance was terrible, while terrible was still a nice way of wording it as soon as his length was wrapped up from anything. Needless to say that it had gone worse over the years as well.

As the Jade didn't stop the slow, gentle stroking motions of his hand Wei Wuxian sank further against him. Not much time passed until he began to curse, his hands holding onto the edges of the tub - his body too weak to even leave a mark on them.

,,It's okay already.. let's just.."

,,Let me take care of you, Xingan." *see notes*

,,Why.. why are you so stubborn?"

,,What are you afraid of?"

At this point Lan Wangji was unsure if his husband was unable, or unwilling, to reply. Wei Wuxian's breathing had turned into such heavy panting, his body strangely relaxed yet at the same time tense. What the older male couldn't see was the blush spreading over the others cheeks, his lids fallen shut.

Continuing with the motions of his hand, as his lover released for the second time his reactions already grew more "severe". The tension was more like a cramp, his "Er-Gege" moan so choked and full of bliss,.. It was clear that the years of ignorance towards his length took somewhat of a toll on Wei Wuxian.

,,Let us leave the bath, I am not done with you yet."

Honestly, the younger one of them felt ready to fall asleep. He felt so exhausted and far more relaxed than usually,.. so much so that he could barely make out whether the words of his husband were supposed to be a threat or a lure - in truth, Wei Wuxian didn't know how much more he could endure.

Some time passed before they - in a rather complicated manner - had managed both to get clean and dry. Sitting there on the edge of the tub, half asleep, Wei Ying wrapped both his arms and legs around the taller one of them as he got picked up. Carrying him to the bed, Lan Wangji then let the other down.. but instead of pulling away he began to peck his way down on his lovers body - Naturally, the Patriarch's legs ended up bend at the knee as well as parted, clearly waiting for "more".

,,Are you finally going to embrace me, Huanguang-Jun?~"

,,No."

,,So cold, Er-Gege.."

As seductively as Wei Wuxian had said his words while propping himself up, head tilted and his still rather wet hair a mess - Lan Wangji didn't give in, yet it wasn't until he glanced up that his lover's eyes widened as the younger male finally got the hint.

,,You know you don't have to do that."

,,Why not?"

,,You don't like doing it, right?"

It was barely visible but the Jade's brows furrowed minimally and his head tilted to the right just as much.. Pausing for a moment, he then gave a clear answer as he placed a gentle peck between the slit where his other half's glans and shaft turned into one.

Even though Lan Wangji wasn't overly used to tending to his husband with his mouth, the few times he had done so in the past he had learned a few things - and of course he was the last to forget anything. Wrapping his hand around the root of his lovers length, the taller one of them placed another peck on the tip, glanced up and licked over it afterwards without taking his eyes away.

Wei Ying was red in the face, the look of it giving away that if the Jade would go through with that, their night would be cut short because the younger one would definitely fall asleep as soon as he finished.. That didn't cause Lan Zhan to stop though, as he teased with his tongue over the others tip and slit once more before wrapping his lips around him.

It wasn't necessarily because he didn't want to rush it, yet as he picked up the slow paced sucks.. after keeping them going for a while when he felt like Wei Wuxian was getting close, he stopped and pulled away. The taller one of the couple then watched as the others breathing calmed, yet body remained tense and grew more tense with each time. Yes, Lan Wangji was a bit of a rough guy during sex, he might even have a sadistic streak - but in this moment in time he just wanted to get a reaction from the love of his life that he wasn't getting which prompted him to edge the other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Xingan" is a chinese word/phrase of endearment. It means "heart & liver" in the context that you recognise the person you're using it for is the most important. Without them you can't live, like without a heart or liver


	129. WangXian | 6

,,Why are you refusing to move your hips?"

Wei Wuxian was just running his hand over his face, brushing some of his hair out of it as the other spoke up. He needed a few seconds before he could even put together a clear thought as he looked at his husband in a confused way with his gaze clouded from pleasure and pain.

,,What..? If you would stop teasing I'd cum either way.."

,,I will not let you until you move."

,,What is going on with.. Oh, Er-Gege.."

The former Patriarch's try to question his lovers behaviour was once more cut short as those soft lips and the wetness around his swollen as anything length combined again. His senses were so overtaken for once without pain, with nothing but his front getting teased, that he honestly didn't even know what to do - he was quite unable to do anything since he simply wasn't used to it.

It wasn't until Lan Wangji then reached out, got a hold of his husbands hand and put it on the back of his own head while holding the length all the way in the back of his throat that the other gave in. There was no conscious decision being made, the build up was just so impossible to endure and god how much Wei Ying wanted to find relief. In a natural reflex, and in his completely gone out state, the Patriarch then entangled his fingers in the Jades hair.. and when the latter was about to do nothing more than to suck, Wei Wuxian held him somewhat roughly in place as his hips moved up.

If the taller one of them would've wanted to, he could've easily refused to make his muscles give in to the none existent strength of his other half.. However, he decided not to. Holding his eyes closed shut, Lan Zhan concentrated on nothing but keeping his gag and pull away reflex under control.. In truth, that really wasn't as hard due to how "different" his lovers pleasured noises sounded. Wei Wuxian cursed as he kept moving his hips, his moans a tad deeper, a different kind of pleased.. he sounded overwhelmed, yet not in the usual way where his voice would grow more high pitched, as his prostate got hit.

Not much time passed before Wei Wuxian then shoved his length into the Jade's throat for a last time, choking out something inaudible that was more than likely the others name as he released for the third time. It wasn't that large of an amount, yet it was still.. not overly pleasant nor disgusting for the prim and proper Lan who again fought against his urge to pull away. At the end he did though as his lover let go of his hair, the release wasn't even entirely over just yet but.. Well, Lan Wangji was Lan Wangji after all, turning his head he coughed against his fist a few times and by the time he turned his head.. the love of his life had already fallen asleep.

Staring at the other, the taller male got up from the bed and sat down on the empty third of it, cross-legged. He was having a hard problem himself, yet all he could do was look at his beloved.. only now, fast asleep and more or less after passing out did the oh so terrible Patriarch have this relaxed expression on his face, accompanied by a smirk. One that was so similar to that the initial Wei Ying had directed at him a few times as he glanced him up and down. It wasn't the usual sweet, satisfied grin or smile that played on his asleep husbands lips usually.. It wasn't the "My husband just slept with me" kind.. Put into more modern, vulgar words: It was the smirk of someone who had just fucked the mouth of a person he found hot enough to fuck.

And it made Lan Wangji think. He had never thought about it before.. a possible role switch. Looking back to his teenage years where he had his first imagination to take over the bratty, out of control, Wei Wuxian due to the porn book in his sects library pavillion.. Even from there on out, even as Wei Wuxian's entire being and looks had changed when he came back as the Yiling Patriarch - Lan Wangji had never played with the thought.

Sure, there were many times where it had stung when his husband would flirt with girls, as he still imagined that Wei Ying would be the "man" with them all in private moments.. Yet between them, it simply hadn't been a thought of his. Even less after the other was resurrected. With all the ways in which his other half had begged for his body, was it really the Jade's fault that he had.. forgotten, or repressed the reality of things which was that Wei Wuxian was a fully functioning man that had all his knowledge from the endless amount of hetero porn books he has read?

As much as Lan Wangji thought and thought while staring at that smirk that didn't fade from his husbands face for a long time.. It didn't take long before it sank into his mind that it wasn't right. That, probably, actually, there were things they needed to work on. Communicating, getting to know one another.. Lord, after knowing one another for so many years, after being married for almost 2, Lan Zhan only began to question there and then how wrong their relationship was secretly running. How could it be that he didn't even know what position Wei Ying liked to imagine himself in, how often he usually tended to himself,..

It was only then and there that he came to realise that they were both walking on the same path, while most of their life's were secret, closed kept books on both sides. He knew nothing about Wei Ying, and since he rarely properly gave an answer when the other asked him something his husband had also stopped asking him as much. It wasn't like they weren't communicating, but looking back.. Weren't they too much of cultivational partners than partners for one another? Weren't they too focused on the physical things and work than each other?


	130. WangXian | 7

Lan Wangji was so lost in thought that he almost got a little startled as the other turned and mumbled something inaudible in his sleep. Staring at Wei Yings back.. he really didn't know what the other had to endure. Whether it be living in another person's body, losing so much, or how much the younger one had to endure when it came to their physical activities. Even in those many years he had spend alone, Lan Zhan had never once been entered by anything, nor did he overly think about it - now he did though.

He himself wasn't the type to ask, Wei Wuxian wasn't the type to complain seriously even in moments where the taller male knew there must've been honest discomfort involved. Staring at his hand, then again at his lovers back that was turned towards him.. If they were as complicated as they were until then.. even if it went against his usual way of being, shouldn't he somehow get to know his other half more?

Usually it wouldn't have been like the Jade, "usual" however didn't count much - or at all - when it came to Wei Wuxian. Turning onto his back, Lan Wangji closed his eyes and used one of his sects many self-calming techniques.. Once it had worked, he bend his legs, spread them a little and stared at his hand.

He couldn't even imagine to get something to fit inside of that part of ones body, if he wouldn't have done so and gotten it proven for years - every day - at this point. Looking at his hand, then a last time at his lovers back, yet.. It felt so uncomfortable and honestly quite painful as well as he tried to go about things the way he usually did with his other half. The Jade didn't hate himself for it, even though he stopped after a few moments of his digit trying to force his virgin muscles apart.. but he was for sure mad at himself and not proud of himself at all.

At the end Lan Wangji got up from the bed, washing his hands before he went back into the bedroom. As he entered, Wei Wuxian had turned again, his hand moving around on the sheets in a clear attempt to find his missing other half.. Of course, the older male layed down and wrapped his arms around him.

In truth however, the younger Lan brother didn't have half as much fun during this night.. even less during the entire trip so far than the Lan Sect leader. Lan Zhan spend a lot of time thinking, maybe overthinking would be a better term, since.. He was anything but good at forming bonds with others, he had never been told that he needed to talk and now he feared that he and his husband might one day fall apart again if they wouldn't do so. If they wouldn't change things between them.

When he finally managed to fall asleep, the taller one of the couple really didn't have the most pleasant of dreams.


	131. Junior Trio | 1

,,How was it?!"

,,He was great of course!"

Sizhui nudged his fellow sect member in the side again as Jin Ling finally caught up to them - they were all still sleeping in the Jin Ling's room. However, Jin Ling could also be quite the actor if he truly wanted to and so his friends excited expressions dropped as he looked - defeated.

,,Oh.."

Both Lan boys let the awkward little noise out at the same time - It was only then that the one in his golden robes stood as upright as he could, taking in almost the same position as his uncle with quite the matching look and the tone in which he spoke so full of arrogance - clearly a hint of his dad popping through.

,,Of course, I dominated the meeting. I got everything I wanted-"

,,Everything we wanted A-Ling."

,,Let him finish what he has to say, Jingyi!"

While Jin Ling threw a glare at the not overly Lan Lan disciple, Sizhui this time hit him a little harder and glared himself.

,,Forget about him."

Saying that, Sizhui grabbed a already prepared cup - with adult "tea" in it - and handed it to the youngest of them before sitting down. Jin Ling soon joined but drowned the liquor in one go first to keep up the tension in the room for a bit longer.

The next 20 minutes in the young guys room were spent with Jin Ling explaining a small part of what happened, only for his friends to start to cheer. They were drinking in between, most allowed to legally do so by then, so it grew messy somewhat quick. Wen Ning was just sitting there, questioning life choices and quite melancholic and heavy-hearted as he watched over and over again how much the world was daily changing without him.

,,So Ouyang Zizhen is allowed to attend as well?"

,,I just said so, weren't you listening?"

,,We did. It's just all so-"

,,.. out of the blue."

Jingyi had asked, just to make sure - then Jin Ling replied in his usual way before Sizhui spoke up and the younger Lan finished.. or well, more interrupted what his friend had to say.

~💙~

,,That might be totally random but.. Does anyone here have an idea what they are even doing?"

,,Mh?"

Some time had passed where the young ones had sat in silence, their pace in drinking and refilling their cups quite fast yet Jin Ling and Sizhui looked at Jingyi in equal confusion as his lively mind wandered places they didn't know of.

,,I mean, Zewu-Jun and BianHua Shengshou are supposed to go back and forth to the other's sect, with us.. That leaves a lot of room for us to try to play matchmaker.. they would be the second couple like Hanguang-Jun and Senior Wei then, but does anyone know.. ya know, how "that" part of their relationships even works?"

It took a few moments before the other boys finally understood, and both of them went as red in the face as the other did.

,,Why would I?!"

,,I know I don't.. I have seen a few books lying around that look.. suspicious, but I didn't look in."

,,Aren't you two interested at all? I mean, we all have heard and seen a few things so far.. just remember that one time in an inn where both Huanguang-Jun and Senior Wei looked so.. relaxed and satisfied. Can you imagine getting like that from, you know."

Looking at each of them, Wen Ning knew that all of this probably wouldn't end well. Even Jin Ling who went from pale, to red, to green and back to red in the face stared at his cup rather awkwardly at the end. He was also the one to speak up in a rather low tone at the end a few minutes later.

,,I think I know something.. I mean, not "that", but at a few sect meeting some people always pull Sect Leader Nie to the side.. as far as I got it they ask him for "books".."

,,Is he running a porn book business on the side? That's quite the trick, honestly.. I mean, what better way to get connections than over the natural urges of pretty much anyone?"

,,Jingyi??"

Sizhui couldn't believe what he had just heard. Sure, he and Jingyi were quite close but.. they had only once went into such "sinful" waters conversation wise and back then they were just hitting their first hints of turning into man.. And that versus the way in which his fellow sect member spoke now, as if it was the most common topic to talk about, still got to Sizhui, not only him as well.

,,As if you two don't know what I'm talking about. Especially you, Sizhui, totally don't need to act so innocent. Want me to remind you of-"

,,You don't need to remind me of that time."

,,I want to hear though."

If Sizhui could've disappeared into the ground, he more than likely would've done so. Jin Ling seemed to have grown overly curious, meanwhile the oldest of the Juniors knew how gladly Jingyi would satisfy the youngest's innocent mind.

,,I will tell you everything you want to know about our secrets.. but only if you manage to get us one of those books from Nie Huaisang, A-Ling.~"

To everyone's surprise, Jingyi was smirking a little before he said what he did and while Wen Ning wanted to run by then - Jin Ling froze in place as the oldest of the Juniors hoped and prayed that the future Jin Sect Leaders sense of shame and pride was more important than hearing his story.

,,Let me just think of a strategy, so I won't blow up our idea and then,.. I swear, if it's a crap story at the end I'll shove the book down your throat!"

,,It's a good story! Definitely something you wouldn't expect from the best of the best of the Lan Sect Disciples!~"

It was around at this point that Wen Ning excused himself, he really didn't wish to hear the story of his secret nephew that he was probably about to hear. The Lan Juniors allowed him to go into their room, yet Wen Ning decided to go outside for a while as the younger Juniors began to dig Sizhui's grave.


	132. Junior Trio | 2

At the end Jin Ling and Jingyi were the ones to leave the younger ones room in order to find Nie Huaisang. Jingyi wanted to tease his fellow sect member and Jin Ling wanted to get to know Sizhui's secret too much to stay still or let the chance slip away. It didn't even take long before they found the Nie Sect leader in the dining hall, eating and drinking alone all by himself which.. was odd, but good for the young ones.

,,Sect leader Nie.. We're sorry for interrupting you in the middle of your meal, but.."

,,We have a request."

Jingyi finished off the sentence his friend simply couldn't get out, yet Nie Huaisang looked at them just as confused as surprised - with a hint of waiting for it to turn into some sort of cruel like prank. Regardless of his natural suspicions, the sect leader then gestured with his hand for them to sit down as he spoke up in a bit more of a "normal person" tone.

,,Please, have a seat.. I must be honest and say that I'm unsure what I could probably help you with.. Especially after I.."

,,Sect leader.. I won't lie and say I forgot. I will not forget what you have done, yet.. I am going to take over my father's sect soon, I do not wish for the past to come in between of it. What you have done wasn't right, but.. I.. I forgave Wei Wuxian, as far as I can, and in comparison.. You had your reasons, even if it went too far, I know what it can do with you.. both, revenge and hatred."

Jingyi sat there a little left out, Jin Ling had sooner or later explained only the tiniest bits of why Nie Huaisang was kind of "blackmailed" by the Lan Sect especially. Nie Huaisang however looked at the boy in golden robes with both surprise and respect, but also a hard to categorize hint of something else - it was the first time someone showed understanding towards him, since forever.

,,I haven't said so earlier.. but you have my respect, future sect leader. You have matured and grown a lot since the last time I've really seen you.. Now, after you forgiving me.. How may I help you?"

,,Do you want me to say it?"

,,No, it's alright."

The Nie sect leader looked from Jingyi who spoke first to the future sect leader, again quite confused. Jin Ling then cleared his throat before going all out, his expression close to Jiang Cheng's, unchanging gaze fixed on the headshaker as he said what he did in the most neutral of tones he could manage.

,,I know of your side business. I would like to propose an exchange between one or two of your books and the best of fans I will be able to find. Of course, we wish for you to keep that exchange to yourself, sect leader."

While Jingyi was sitting there with the "Oh god he really just said it out loud" thought, Nie Huaisang in turn had a similar yet different one that he then said out loud a moment later as well, in a tone full of disbelief and a bit more quietly.

,,Did I just understand you correctly..?"

,,Yes."

,,You mean.. one of those books?"

,,We do."

Jingyi threw in and the oldest of the three nodded slowly, his fingers reaching out to his fan that was laying on the table and tapped onto it with the fan. It took a bit before Huaisang managed to collect himself, recall how old the boys were by then and speak up.

,,Are you in search for a normal or.. a special kind of those books?"

,,It would be of help to have one of each.. sexuality, so we can compare."

The Juniors didn't realise at the time how the entire situation seemed, why Nie Huaisang was eyeing them the way he did.. They were two young men. Two men asking for a gay porn book. While everyone knew those two and Lan Sizhui were already sharing a room.......... One may come to the same wrong conclusion as the headshaker did. And in truth, Nie Huaisang's conclusion didn't stop there as he got up from his seat and asked the young guys to follow him - to him it sounded as if they were asking for a straight book as a terrible try to cover up their true intentions.

Jingyi and Jin Ling still didn't realize anything as every so often, especially when handing the Juniors the "special" book they had asked for.. how their senior looked at them, and Nie Huaisang for sure kept looking at them with an even more obvious expression once they had thanked him, turned and began to walk away.

If Jiang Cheng should get to know.. that he had just given his nephew a cut sleeve porn book.. If Jiang Cheng should ever get to know, that he gave them such a book while leaving them alone and unsupervised while they were clearly at least tipsy... Nie Huaisang knew for sure that he'd be dead and nothing would be able to save him.

Neither Nie Huaisang nor the two young men that could on one side barely refrain from opening the in a cloth wrapped books on their ways back to Jin Ling's room however knew that.. right at that time, Jiang Cheng was indulging in exactly those things they were about to read.. with the Lan Sect Leader.

,,Are you sure he'll keep that to himself?"

,,Who does he want to go to? My uncle? What do you think he'd do to him?"

,,Well.. maybe not much if our guess is correct and our plan works out."

Thinking about it like that, Jin Ling swallowed inaudibly before he managed to pull himself together and say in a typical tone for him.

,,As the rumors go, the only thing Sect Leader Nie loves more than books and poems are fans. Now shut it, we worked it out so you give your never closing mouth a bit of rest so you can tell that story in a second."

,,Whatever you wish, Sect leader."

Jingyi replied in a teasing and sarcastic tone - only moments later the duo was back in the room.


	133. Junior Trio | 3

As they entered the room to both of their surprise Sizhui was still there, looking at them with a half excited and half defeated expression. Of course, Jin Ling provocatively wiggled the in cloth wrapped books in the air.

,,You got them?"

,,What did you think?"

,,Don't forget that our future leader has more money on his back than we can imagine in a whole lifetime."

,,You wouldn't even be able to imagine how rich I am in 80."

For once both of the Lan disciples rolled their eyes, it wasn't like they had really needed to hear that, but oh well. As if to torture the oldest of them, Jin Ling and Jingyi went about getting undressed again - not entirely, just out of their usual and into their night robes or gowns. Just like their seniors, they had also gotten individualized and luxurious looking pairs. Sizhui in the meantime went about collecting some more liquor, even refilling his friend's cups - he had had a few more to prepare himself for his nightmare in a bit while the critical duo had been away.

~💙~

,,Is everyone ready?"

,,What did you even get?"

The younger ones glanced at one another, Jin Ling was going about unwrapping the books - Jingyi then spoke up.

,,We got a normal one and one for the men with men study we're trying to pull ourselves through right now."

,,How did Sect Leader Nie react?"

,,He looked confused and so on, but-"

,,- A-Ling had him in his grip straight away."

Sizhui felt quite sorry for Huaisang, even as he changed his position to sit beside Jin Ling - the Lan's having them in the middle, so they could all take a good look at the book.

,,Isn't that against like.. A load of your sects rules? I'm just going to ask now, did you both already see one of those? Or like,.. No, forget it, I doubt with how Hanguang-Jin is clinging to you all either of you would've had the chance to turn book knowledge into reality."

,,Oh? Ask Sizhui about that.~"

Honestly, while Sizhui went red in the face, Jin Ling was sitting there wide-eyed. He had honestly barely seen the contents of one of those books once, maybe once a barely dressed lady swimming in one of Yunmengs many rivers.. The youngest wouldn't like to admit, but he was scared to death to "go for it" and then his uncle finds out possibly and.. Sex before marriage, a possible child coming out of it. If Jin Ling already feared for his life because of his uncle, he had expected that the Lan's - especially his adopted son - wouldn't dare to even look at another person due to Hanguang-Jun.

,,Anyway.. What about you, oh sect leader?"

,,I won't do anything to bring shame on my sect, other than you wanna be perfect Lan's"

,,Aww."

,,Shut up!"

Of course, that little moment was again going on between Jingyi and Jin Ling, escalating to the point where the youngest slapped the one age wise in the middle with the "normal" porn book.

,,Could you both calm down just for once? Sometimes one could really come to the conclusion that you two should be locked up in a room to let it out with each other."

It wasn't like Sizhui to get annoyed, even less mad.. nor was it like him to say something like what he had just said in a clearly annoyed tone - but he did, and it shocked both of his friends as for once even Jingyi's jaw dropped, and they went just as red in the face.

,,The hell are you talking about?!"

,,I believe it's called attraction."

Now Sizhui was the one to get slapped from the future Jin Sect Leader with the straight porn book.. so hard that it fell on his lap, opening on a side with the drawing of a position that Jingyi then went on to explain as the three of them tilted their heads in all sorts of directions.

,,This.. doesn't look comfortable at all.. Well.. for us it's another part of work anyway.."

,,If you see it like that already now then I feel sorry for your future wife."

Even the oldest of the three couldn't hold back that statement as his fellow sect member had said what he did after a bit of a break where they had tried to figure out the depicted position.

,,I would definitely wish for my private life to be different.."

Jin Ling said in a bit of a gone out tone, causing the Lan's to throw glances at one another. The youngest of them was staring so intensely, yet not overly pleasured at the drawings as he slowly began to turn the pages and by the time they had gone through the book once.. They weren't overly needy, sure, there were things happening inside of them but a lot of the drawings depicted a man with several lovers, or people watching a couple in the middle of the act. At the end they felt so disappointed on the inside that they went about drinking a few cups of liquor without even feeling the need to comment much for minutes.

,,I don't know about you two, but those books really don't make you crave it.. even the descriptions on how to do what are quite.."

,,Uninformative and boring?"

It was clear that especially Sizhui had slowly crossed the point of being tipsy, he was quite "blunt" as Jin Ling had been the first to speak. Nodding, they all three agreed as the youngest leaned forward and placed the a tad thinner book on his lap. They all stared at it, drank more, went back to staring until Jin Ling then spoke with this strange mixture of a Yunmeng and a Lanling dialect.

,,I'm just gonna ask a last time. Are you both sure you want to do that?"

,,We don't want to "do it" we want to "see it" and nothing more. Don't get the wrong ideas.."

,,A-Yi.. You should be glad and on your knees if anything wants to involve themselves with you in such a way. I'm just saying, I mean.. It can't get any worse than the other, can it?"

After a brief moment of silence where, for the first time in over an hour, the boys really grew unsure.. because what if they did feel something? What if the book was that much better? Which prompted Sizhui to then speak up and what he said, even though the other two hesitantly agreed, would never be brought up again.

,,Just in case...... Whatever shall happen will never leave this room. NEVER."

They had no idea at this time about how much they would need that promise.


	134. Junior Trio | 4

The young trio did end up feeling things. Those kinds of things, not a small amount of it either. The book was different, a lot.. The scenes seemed more loving, there weren't even a handful of those with "stalker" or a third party involved. They had grown so used to Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian being all open about their relationship with one another that it didn't occur to them that that was mostly caused by homosexuality being accepted yet generally still a secret and rather frowned upon. Neither of them really had a person in mind as they took in the drawings, but that didn't mean their young and inexperienced bodies didn't react to them. As Jin Ling closed the book, they were all sitting in awkward positions and none of them looked at the other.

,,Is it just me or.."

Glancing over, even though the other two didn't respond with words - both Jin Ling and Sizhui were shaking their heads slowly, faces red as anything with their eyes wide open in pure shock. Jingyi then nodded as well, more to himself, quite glad about it - even though it didn't make much better.. nothing in truth.

,,What.. What is Sizhui's secret?"

,,I don't think my story would help our current "situation" at all.. mine for sure not.."

,,We can just do it as well and get it done and over with."

It was a rare thing to happen that for once Jin Ling and Sizhui were the ones to stare at Jingyi with their minds being unable to comprehend fully that he had just said what he did.

,,You're not gonna get that thing of yours into me!"

,,Oh? So you're not quite lively below the belt, huh, young Mistress?"

,,We're all having the same problem Jingyi, just stop it already."

,,So you want him to take you over?"

,,I knew you'd be the type to watch, too scared to do anything on his own."

,,I swear, I'm gonna take you both in a minute if you won't stop."

The two younger guys heads turned in an instant as Sizhui said this sentence so seriously, almost sounding a little like Jiang Cheng more than even the most grumpy version of Lan Qiren.

,,Why the hell would you be the one to-"

Jin Ling stopped himself from saying what Jingyi then said in a tone full of accusations and weirdly upset undertone.

,,Oh so you want HIM to take you over?"

,,I'm the one who should do it simply because I'm the only one with experience here."

It was the last thing Sizhui had wanted to use to get his friends to stop the madness they were back at engaging in.. but as hoped, while the youngest was staring at him wide-eyed with his jaw dropped, Jingyi had grown silent yet glared due to the unwanted reveal of his "innocence".

,,Wait...... did I just.. did you just.."

,,Before you're going to start with "But you're the son of" and all of those matters.. It happened once, I'm not proud of it....."

,,How.. when.."

,,Do we really need to hear that?"

,,Reap what you sow, A-Yi. You were the first to get A-Ling into going to Sect Leader Nie so you can force me to tell."

Jingyi really didn't end up liking the fact that he couldn't argue that at all. The one in his golden robes, as if to support his oldest friend in the weirdest of ways, poured Sizhui another cup of liquor and gave it to him. After that, he refilled his own and Jingyi took the entire jar.

,,It was on my 16th birthday-"

,,16?!"

,,Just.. don't remind me. We were out, send to a smaller city in order to look for any weird occurrences.. Of course, we drank. A lot in all honesty. Huanguang-Jun wasn't around, and we were forced to take separate rooms.. there was a young maiden serving us that night-"

,,She was so pretty, kind and sweet.."

Jingyi swooned, slumped over and hid his hands in his face - he so couldn't believe that it was the older Lan Disciple who "got her in the end", and that was quite clear. Jin Ling just looked at him with a raised brow, almost a glare because the story got interrupted.

,,She was quite.. obviously interested, even though she was older than me.. more than likely an adult already and.. not new to certain things.. We were all quite drunk and after bringing everyone into their rooms.. a while after I had shut the door to my own, someone knocked, I opened.."

,,And it was her?"

Sizhui nodded, confirming the youngest guys guess even though it was quite clear she must've been it.

,,She brought me another jar of liquor, a few snacks as well.. I don't even know why but, I let her come inside and after I put the tray down, stood back up and turned she was already so close.. I honestly got so startled I tried to step back and bumped down on the table.."

,,And…?"

Jin Ling asked after a while, having waited until his patience run out as the oldest of the trio didn't continue. Weirdly enough, the two Lan Sect Disciples ended up saying the same line in sync, with Jingyi clearly being annoyed as anything.

,,It would be disrespectful towards her to talk about anything after that."

There was silence for probably a minute, the future Jin Sect leader blinking over and over again as Jingyi dropped his head back against the wall. The only thing Jin Ling could say at the end was probably the most normal reaction.

,,That story is totally fake."

,,It's not. It really is not a lie."

,,Oh yeh, the next thing you're going to say is that it's against your rules.. How many of your sects damned rules did we break just alone today?"

,,If it's not a lie then what's her name?"

,,As if I would tell you her name just so you can go and look for her. It's not like it's her job to entertain man. She made the decision and I didn't say no.. The next day she didn't even act like anything happened."


	135. Junior Trio | 5

,,Are you sure she wasn't a professional after all?"

Jin Ling couldn't help but ask that, not with how weird of a story it was and even weirder of a supposed behavior the maiden had shown.. Sizhui however shook his head, a faint hint of red covering his face that hadn't been caused by the liquor they had drank.

,,She didn't earn anything from it other than.."

,,And now?"

,,It's been over 4 years at this point.. She acted like nothing happened, and I am not proud of the fact that it did.."

,,A-Yuan, come on.. We both know you're trying to forget about the fact that you didn't have your first time in the right way and you want to forget about it so you can have a new first time."

Even though the oldest of them didn't reply, there was some sadness visible in his eyes.. as it kept lingering, Jin Ling then asked the next best thing to try to stop this entire situation from going further south.

,,How was it? You can say that much or?"

,,It was... better than anything you would expect.."

Sizhui replied in a lower, more shy sounding tone as he stared off in the distance while his hands were holding onto the empty cup on his lap. While the youngest tried to imagine, Jingyi let out a groan not long after that sounded.. rather pained, as he then spoke in quite a matching tone.

,,Why do you idiot have to have so much luck.. and no one even noticed until today.. God... I want to get it done already as well.. or at least get it off..."

,,Then do it, it's not like we'll look."

,,I know perfectly fine that you would if you're already the one suggesting it, A-Ling."

,,As if there's anything to see on you anyway."

,,You little-"

It had been clear from the start that at some point the situation would escalate again between the typical fighting duo. After riling one another up in tones full of provocation, Jingyi was the one to push Jin Ling to the ground.. Sizhui was watching in silence, refilling his cup in between,.. however, after a while of wrestling Jingyi froze.

,,I didn't expect that to be the result.."

Sizhui says honestly, sure - Jin Ling had grown a lot, but for how much punishment Jingyi usually got, none had thought that he'd be the one getting pinned to the ground by the youngest of them.. yet he was.

The younger Lan's eyes widened, wiggling around as the one that looked eerily similar to both his uncle and father - in a good way - held him down and stared at him with a mad expression that was 100% that of his uncle.

,,Let me go already! What the..?!"

,,How about you two just finally let it out on one another? So that we can get some peace still before heading back home."

,,How?"

Jin Ling didn't even realize that he had just asked "how" he was supposed to go about "it", his head turning to the oldest of them that sat there so calmly like nothing was going on. As the now really panicking Jingyi then began to wiggle harder again however the youngest tightened his grip on his wrists while staring right back into the other virgins eyes.

,,Don't you freaking dare! Get off already.."

,,Always talking so arrogantly and provocatively but once you're about to get your beating for it you're running as fast as from ghosts."

The youngest of them said as he got up and sat back down beside Sizhui who had barely managed to hold back a chuckle, leaving the furiously blushing Jingyi on the ground. ,,How do you even go about all of that? Like, do you just go for a kiss or.." It was rather audible and noticeable over all that the young man in his golden robes was rather frustrated, not that anyone needed to ask why. They honestly all felt the same way, their time was different - there weren't endless battles and what not all that could distract one from their natural urges, at this point they were more running around trying to find work and rebuilding their sects with "new generations".. while at the same time especially the Lan's were looked at quite critically for doing so too young, even married. None of them wanted to be a second Jin Guangshan either really. ,,Well.. it's actually not that hard." ,,You can say that so easily, asshole." ,,No, really.. most happens naturally.. like.." Jingyi who had just went about propping himself up on his elbows couldn't believe that what he was seeing was actually happening. His fellow sect member had turned the youngest ones head with one of his fingers, the eye contact so intense as he lifted the frozen in place Jin Ling's chin up with the back of one of his digits. Neither of the younger guys noticed that Sizhui was actually talking in between, instructions such as "You gently turn and lift their head like this, then you're naturally looking from their eyes to their lips.." ,,You really lost your mind now A-Yuan." Jingyi blurted out those words in a matching tone as he watched how the oldest of them tilted his head and gradually moved his own closer to the future sect leaders lips. To both of the younger males surprise, as quickly as the ignored lesson had began, as quickly did Sizhui stop and leave a madly flustered Jin Ling sitting there. From there on things began to unfold for a bit between the two Lan sect member. ,,So learning with your pillow or a fruit is the better strategy?" ,,Wh-.. Where the hell do you know that from?!" ,,Forgot that I'm assigned to the night control since quite some time, mh?" ,,That doesn't mean you can look into other people's room!" ,,You left the windows completely open. You don't even want to know what I already had to hear coming from your room, A-Yi." ,,You even stay there and listen?!" ,,You're quite loud, day in day out. That's all I'm going to say." ,,You're so shameless.." ,,I'm shameless? Since when are you so stiff?"


	136. Junior Trio | 6

,,Just look at what you've done to him, he doesn't even react anymore!"

It was only when Jingyi pointed out what he just did that Sizhui's expression instantly switched to a "Oh.." like one as he looked over.. The future sect leader was sitting there completely gone out, his eyes wide open, gaze fixed on nothing - for a moment his friends actually believed his soul had shattered or, for sure, at least left his body.

,,Don't let it get to you how A-Yi talks right now.. in case you felt something we're all quite intoxicated and honestly when was the last time when any of us.. you know what I'm talking about."

,,Not a big deal? Remember that we're trying to match make his uncle to Zewu-Jun and what he has to do in order for that to work out."

,,Could you both stop it already? It's not like any of us is getting married to the other just because we're drunk and dumb and horny as hell.-"

Both of the Lan's flinched just as hard as the youngest of the trio suddenly spoke up in such a "done with his life" tone, running his hands over his face by the time they looked at him.

,,-I was just startled because A-Yuan acted so seriously all of a sudden, and he's really the last person you would expect it from."

,,Honestly with Senior Wei and Hanguang-Jun's influence we should've all grown somewhat resistant to it all already. We're acting like three year old's and A-Yi and I are adults since quite a while by now."

Sizhui then said with a shrug, no one could disagree as the next bit of conversation went on between the younger duo again.. with Jingyi being quite shocked at some and Jin Ling being just as clear at others.

,,What are we going to do now?"

,,Let's just.. drink some more and get it done and over with."

,,A-Li.. you don't mean.."

,,No! I really don't want to lose my actual first time with either of you. I don't care what you two do with one another but, no."

While honestly.. Sizhui wouldn't have cared all that much either way, Jingyi couldn't help but let out a relieved breath. The shock from Jin Ling on top of him from a while back still lingered, and he wasn't quite sure what he would be doing if it would happen again once he was even more intoxicated. Regardless of that thought though, Jingyi was the first to grab the next liquor bottle, soon followed from the other two doing the same as some silence spread between the three of them.

~💙~

,,Do you... like her? Like that, I mean.."

,,A-Ling.. honestly, I wouldn't say it left me unaffected. It's been years by now, however, it was nothing but.. a drunken accident. Just know that, don't play with your first time. Not the actual one especially, it's.. extremely complicated to not think back, to forget.."

They had drank quite a bit more, causing both of the usually louder young men to grow a bit more silent as they both looked at Sizhui who had a mixture of a sad and a bit of a melancholic smile playing on his lips.

,,How is it though? .. Can you just say a bit more?"

It was one of the rare times when Sizhui let out a chuckle, putting his liquor jar down beside him he rested his head back against the wall and closed his eyes. The oldest of the trio couldn't blame the other two for being interested really, since he knew Jingyi was just as needy for answers as Jin Ling.

,,It's strange, really.. Your body just knows what to do, you barely notice how you react at the time. It's all.. quite overwhelming.. the sounds, sensations.. Their skin is so soft, their hands so slender and thin yet by far not weak.. One spot is softer than the other. It's quite messy as well though, wet and slippery.."

As the oldest of them minimally opened his eyes he could see how his friends awkwardly shifted their positions, curling up against a wall, arms wrapped around their legs - their problem rather evident.

,,It feels completely different to be touched by someone else in such a way.. Or someone gives themselves to you in such a vulnerable, exposed state... I wouldn't say it's a burden, nor that at the time I felt overly pressured due to how much she led and how drunk I was but.. Thinking back, I was still quite scared. Each tiny change either of us made changed something about the other as well, when you're not used to any of that you're quite often unsure if that's good or bad, or if this is right or wrong.."

,,Was it just once or..?"

Even though the young one in his golden robes kept asking questions, his tone grew lower and more hesitant. Sizhui shook his head, to both of the others surprise while at the same time they had gathered that it was unlikely as well.

,,I think I can recall 4 times.. one wasn't.."

,,Oh wonderful, so she even used her mouth.."

,,Oh."

After a few moments Jingyi then helped the youngest to figure out what was being said without actually being said, which in turn got Jin Ling to let out a little surprised noise - the oldest of them was meanwhile losing his fight against the memories that desperately tried to flood his mind.

,,You're such a lucky ass, A-Yuan."

,,On one side he is, on another.. imagine having it once and then not again.."

,,A-Ling has a point there. Just remembering.. apart from that it's a secret I'll always have to carry around as well."

,,Honestly, if I would just sleep with a random maiden.. I don't know how one is supposed to look at any other girl that is your type afterwards again.. without.. you know.."

,,Depends, I guess.. I personally didn't look at each woman I've met afterwards and had my mind wandering places.. due to our rules and all of that, I'm also rarely close enough to a maiden to have to control myself.."

Jingyi was silently pouting to himself as the youngest and oldest kept going with their conversation that was.. a little odd, but nothing overly unusual for guys in their age that didn't really have anyone else to converse about those matters otherwise.


	137. Junior Trio | 7

,,I don't know how you two are feeling but.. I'm gonna get it off now."

,,At least go to the bathroom!"

,,You can just leave as well."

,,It's MY ROOM!!"

,,And?! No one asked you to watch."

,,As if there's anything to see."

,,Oh my lord.. we are all three guys. We all three have the exact same build. Stopped making such a scene out of it."

The two younger guys paused, they were quite agitated due to aching reasons and Sizhui spoke in between of a sigh.. After the two others said almost the same then in sync he really had enough.

,,How the hell?!"

,,I swear, I'm really going to take the lead in a second."

,,Oh great A-Yuan, what are we supposed to do in your opinion? Just expose ourselves and get it off?"

If their day and age would've been different, the correct phrase to use for what Sizhui went about doing next would've been "ripping the band-aid off in one go". He didn't even reply to his fellow sect members sarcastic remark and instead put one of his arms behind his head before - in a swift, quite elegant motion - opening his night gown after stretching out his legs.

The expressions of the younger two were gold. Shock. Speechlessness.. Accompanied by a blush as bright as it can get as they watched how their friend went about wrapping his free hand around his problem. It was almost as if they were watching an accident, they wanted to look away, but they just couldn't..

,,For the fact that neither of you wanted to watch the other.. you're staring at me quite intensely."

The oldest of the trio said after a short while, his breathing relaxed but a bit heavier than usually as he paused in his words due to knowing perfectly well how to tend to himself in such a manner.

,,It's really not that big of a deal. We have several rooms, we don't even need to look at each other, so just.. don't turn something that normal into such a big issue."

The conversation had only happened once, it was a nightmare.. Lan Wangji had asked him to come to his room and Sizhui was forced through an hour of "the special" parent child talk. It wasn't like his adoptive dad could help him much with what he was interested in sexuality wise, but the Jade tried his best, and he said something that made up for it all..

"Whatever you may prefer in your private life, do not allow for someone to make you feel negative towards yourself for it. Do not allow yourself to feel negative towards yourself for that either. You cannot choose to not be human. We are strict, yet do not forget that you are human."

It was as stiff of a speech as it could be.. but the main point came across which was that judgement shouldn't pave Sizhui's way. No matter if guys, girls, or no one - it didn't matter what he liked, or what not, it wasn't a huge matter, or a huge scandal.. in fact, whatever it was, it would be natural, and he shouldn't feel ashamed for it. Not that Sizhui understood at the time why Lan Zhan found the need to tell him that, nor how much weight and meaning those words had to his dad.. but now he knew what they all knew.

~💙~

A bit more time passed with two of them remaining stiff, yet at the end the next to reach his limit was the other Lan. Jin Ling was feeling awkward, he was sitting with Sizhui to his right and stared at the wall at the other side of the room as he heard the rustling of cloth before.. the same noises as from his right came from diagonally to his left as well, just in a different pace and, as pointed out from the oldest of the trio before, Jingyi really wasn't the quiet type - especially not for long.

,,A-Yuan?"

,,Mh?"

,,I'm bigger than you!~"

Jingyi sounded so pleased and proud of that fact, it got the rather quiet oldest of them to let out a chuckle as he shook his head in a speechless like manner.

,,Not surprising, you're taller as well."

,,A-Yuan?"

,,What now?"

Instead of a direct reply, as Sizhui turned his head, his fellow sect member gestured him with his head to look at..

,,Did he faint?"

,,Stop being such an ass."

As much as it might've seemed like the future Jin Sect leader had fainted, with how he held his eyes closed.. taking a second look, his hand was grabbing onto his knee with a bit of cloth crumbled up in it. He hadn't moved once and was the only one that had remained in this awkward legs pulled up position. - Letting out a soft sigh, Sizhui paused in his motions and reached out to get a hold of the youngest ones arm, shaking him a little as he spoke in a gentle like tone.

,,Are you alright, A-Ling? You're the youngest here, stop forcing yourself."

,,Maybe he's scared of showing himself off?"

,,I just openly admitted I'm smaller than you."

,,Maybe something's wrong with him,.. you know.."

,,There's nothing wrong with my lower half. It's just.. Isn't that all something intimate? Apart from that, I've been stressed for a few weeks now, I don't know if I.. Forget it."

Both of the Lan's paused as the youngest finally spoke up in such a tense tone, sounding frustrated as anything at the same time.. It was unclear if Jingyi went about saying what he said next to tease or in an honest attempt to get the friend of his to let go.

,,If you're worried about whether you're able to stop after one time or how long you're gonna need... Honestly, it's not like we'd care, nor like either of us usually sticks to a rule there. Just saying, I'll give you two minutes and if you're sure there's nothing wrong with you undress or I'm going to rip your robe off."


	138. Junior Trio | 8

,,A-Yuan, do you have any advice when it comes to kissing?"

,,Are you going to ask me for a trial round next?"

,,Why? Would you let me practice with you?"

,,If you stop the pillow kissing then."

,,Idi-"

As said, Jingyi gave the youngest of the trio the 2 minutes. Once that had been set, he went about doing everything like before while quite casually talking with Sizhui who replied in between of a few loose strokes and a chuckle. What caused them both to freeze, stare and Jingyi to pause in his sentence - only to say another one quite a bit too loudly and full of disbelief - was that Jin Ling had slowly stretched his legs out at some point. He wasn't looking at anyone as he opened his robes and let them drop to the side.

,,Are you a horse?! Where does this size come from?!?"

Just like his dad, Jin Ling flushed a bright red and as long as he had taken to finally relax and get undressed.. as quick had he curled himself back up, hiding himself behind his pulled up legs as he stared at the second oldest with his eyes wide open, jaw slightly dropped. It wasn't like Sizhui hadn't stared either, it took him a moment longer than usually to throw a warning like glare at Jingyi as well, yet he went about complimenting Jin Ling then. In truth, the younger Lan's reactions was as severe due to.. the former incident and imagining if it would've gone past the "How?" of Jin Ling.. his body was hurting at just the imagination.

,,I didn't think you would be that trained.. that's incredible.."

,,I.. I..... I used to train with my uncle.. since a few months now each bit of training just sticks, even now where I barely have the time for it.."

,,It's against a few rules but I'm honestly quite jealous.. no matter what I do, I gain strength but almost no muscles.."

While the youngest one spoke with a bit of a nervous and embarrassed stutter, Sizhui then spoke himself in a awkward and a bit ashamed tone as he looked down on himself. Neither of the three had their hands at a critical position by this point, yet as hard as the oldest had tried to force a break in so Jingyi could collect himself - of course, the other not so Lan Lan didn't as he said a few words in a matching tone.

,,A-Yuan.. are you seriously just going to act like you didn't saw what I saw and that I know off you saw as well?"

,,Could you stop talking about my... it's really not that great to have such a.."

,,Well,.. at least we know now where your growth went in the years when you didn't grow taller.."

,,Jingyi, please.."

,,What?!"

Sizhui really couldn't watch the awkwardness unfold any longer, not that he was feeling that way but the youngest of them obviously did. After a short moment of the Lan's staring at one another however,.. the younger one of them then leaned over and pulled on Jin Ling's robe, staring shamelessly as the future sect leader tried to cover up what he was barely able to hide.

,,Is that all or can you get bigger still?"

,,Oh my goodness, A-Yi.. Even I can't help but think you're far too interested at this rate.."

,,Honestly for the shit you're pulling off right now I should take you."

For the first time in quite a while Jin Ling managed to sound more like "himself", his choice of words causing the second oldest to retreat. Jingyi had almost hovered over him, hand on a knee, really.. if he'd have moved his head a bit further down it could've escalated quickly.

,,If you're that interested, want to try?"

Jin Ling didn't really "uncover" himself, he only put his hands on his knees so the other would be able to reach what he was too interested in.. yet, of course, the noisiest one of them all chickened out at that point, his expression priceless.

,,A-Ling, just ignore him."

,,What are you-"

,,You wanted to practice, so."

Jingyi spoke up in a bit of a gay panic as the oldest of them went about getting up, only to sit down beside him - Yes, it was more to get the younger Lan to finally give the future sect leader some peace. Jin Ling was glancing at them out of the corners of his eyes as Jingyi pressed himself further and further against the wall beside him while Sizhui in turn.. leaned in until there was no more space for Jingyi to escape to.

,,It's really not necessary.."

,,You should really stop acting like a maiden in distress after how you push others, A-Yi. Take my advice to heart, if you continue acting so cute and blushing so hard I might forget about the actual purpose of this."

,,Of what-"

The two younger guys went just as red in the face as the now quite drunk Sizhui really "went for it", head tilted to the side, lips pressing against Jingyi's. It turned out however that the other Lan was really more talk than anything as he sat there without moving, palms pressed against the oldest ones chest - not that the minimal space between them would save him at this point.

Pulling away for a moment, Sizhui waited for his fellow sect member to try and say something - which ultimately lead to Jingyi's "demise", as the oldest of the drunk trio leaned back in and let the tip of his tongue trail over Jingyi's lips. Regardless of the whirlwind of emotions going on inside Jingyi, he was drunk, young and horny.. which sooner or later as Sizhui didn't give up caused his body to give in. Not that the kiss was overly skillful, or anything they could brag about with - for more than one reason -, but it was enough for them at the time. Enough for them both to feel more of a rush, the heat inside them rising as a hand of each Lan disappeared to tend to their problems.


	139. Junior Trio | 9

As much as Jin Ling had tried to compose himself.. even without him looking and trying to shut his senses of with all his might - there were things he couldn't blend out. The rustling of clothes, the wet and telling noises beside him,.. not long after followed from the first few shy and barely audible moans. Tugging onto his hair with one hand, eyes closed shut, Jin Ling began to feel it as well. Something inside him began to grow restless, his heart was beating harder and faster as the scene beside him went on, his body hot and tense and aching - breathing going a bit heavier from how hard he tried to endure. At some point, without it even being a conscious decision, the future sect leaders free hand reached to his own aching problem.

,,Fuck.."

The Lan Disciples had lost track, more than a little in fact. It wasn't like they were gay, or had any romantic feelings for one another, but they were drunk and at this moment in time it felt right, good and simply happened. Neither of them knew how long they had been making out and tending to themselves in between as they paused the kiss that had gone quite deep at this point once they heard the future sect leaders weak, trembling curse full of desperation and need. While Sizhui only briefly glanced over at the young mess that kept hiding himself with a bit of a relieved and gentle smile, Jingyi couldn't help but stare more directly..

At the end Sizhui had to turn his fellow sect members head gently back around, leaning in so their lips could meet again - and Jingyi couldn't rip the youngest back out of his own little situation. However, not long into the kiss, in the heat of the moment, the oldest of the trio let out a surprised noise.

,,Want help?"

Only after Jingyi had spoken up, his tone a bit deeper and for them rather off sounding that Jin Ling looked over - Sizhui had at this point been pulled on the younger Lan's stretched out legs, Jingyi's expression that typical for a man in this situation. One of Jingyi's hands was still tending to himself, the other meanwhile found its way to the smallest ones hip area. It was the first time that Sizhui actually looked flustered, his face red and gaze flickering from his fellow sect member to Jin Ling who wasn't quite in the mindset anymore to feel embarrassed or shy.

,,I.."

,,You gave yourself up for practice, only fair from my side to give you something back or?"

Sizhui wasn't able to really get a word out, which only caused Jingyi to lean in, brush their lips together and start one of their many "practice kisses". Seconds later Jin Ling watched how the oldest of them tensed, glancing down.. he had to admit that at this moment in time watching Jingyi jerk Sizhui off while they were making out and the pleasured noises getting picked up again.. it was quite arousing.

~💙~

,,Look at our youngest.. He really grew bigger still.."

After a few minutes where Sizhui had reached out to return the favor his friend was doing him, Jingyi had leaned back against the wall - glancing over to Jin Ling who was staring at them, his legs stretched out by then so really there wasn't anything hidden from either of the three. Once Jingyi had said what he did he chuckled softly, more in a speechless like manner, before turning his attention back to himself and his own playmate. Not long after both of the Lan's pleasured noises grew louder, their breathing more erratic than before as they tipped one another over the edge at almost the same time. They both tensed and the loads they released made their build-up quite clear and evident.

By the time they had calmed down Jin Ling had turned his head away again, probably trying to act like he hadn't stared for the past couple of minutes.. Not that Jingyi would let him get away like that so easily though as he shook his head into the youngest ones direction, smirking at Sizhui at the same time who in turn shook his head - his clear attempt at saying "no" didn't bear fruit.

,,Let's help him out, look at how much he's struggling.~"

Looking over, Sizhui did feel bad.. it was noticeable that Jin Ling was trying quite hard and desperately but was - quite literally - getting nowhere. The smallest of the trio only hesitated really because of the strange tone in which his fellow sect member had spoken.

,,Wouldn't it be better if you use both of your hands?"

,,You can say that so easily because you don't know how idiotic that looks and feels.."

Jingyi hadn't expected to actually get a reply, yet he did. Jin Ling then let out the heaviest of breaths before letting go of his length and staring at a wall at the other side of the room.

,,A-Ling?"

,,Mh?"

As the youngest one turned his head, arms resting over his lap, the next thing he knew was that Jingyi had pulled him in. Jin Ling was both too surprised and frozen in place to fight against the grip on his nape as similar to Sizhui earlier Jingyi now struggled to get the future sect leader to return his kiss. Somewhere in between the oldest got up from Jingyi's lap, walking back to where he had formerly sat: beside Jin Ling.

The younger Lan then used his chance to take over Jin Ling's mouth as just mentioned one let out a moan.. Even without looking, the way in which Jin Ling reached out to pull Jingyi closer to himself made it clear that Sizhui must've started an "attack" himself and whatever the oldest was doing seemed to be to the future sect leaders liking. By then all three of them were reaching the critical point where they didn't take anything in at all anymore, they had crossed the mental line where their usual fights, genders or roles in life mattered.


	140. Junior Trio | 10

Sizhui had to admit to himself that he felt rather intimidated by the size he was tending to. He understood now why the youngest of the trio struggled the way he did with one hand, yet.. it was weirdly intoxicating as well, for all three of them to touch another man this way. The oldest couldn't even deny that regardless of his first time with a girl having been pretty much whatever one could dream of there was a different more wholesome type of pleasure he had achieved by being jerked off from Jingyi.. probably because a man knew how to treat a man, not like he thought about that as he focused on tending to Jin Ling's quite.. huge length. As he glanced up at some point, he felt himself grow harder again due to the way his friends were devouring one another.

While they were devouring one another, tongues dancing along.. to Jingyi's shock the youngest began to dominate him again quite quickly once he had gotten the hang of how kissing worked. There was also something about the way in which Jin Ling had entangled his fingers into his hair, holding him in place with the gesture, that made the younger Lan feel - even with his lack of experience - that Jin Ling wanted more.. that kind of more.

The situation was - in a modern term - Jin Ling's cup of tea. He was quite the spoiled child, so having two people all over him at the same time really wasn't all that bad. He had grown annoyed of trying to tend to himself, not that it usually didn't give him the relief that he needed, but he was young and really.. having to look at all the potential maiden's in such a critical age to find the one that he wished to marry.. it did quite frequently lead to dirty thoughts since at the end of the day didn't he have to find a wife that would be in such a way the right one for all of his life? It wasn't like he intentionally thought improperly of them, but one thing usually leads to another and with the amount of hormones surging through a teenage boys body..

~💙~

,,How about you help A-Yuan a little?"

Jingyi couldn't even reply to the youngest tease for a moment, the latter had broken the kiss, his tone deep and husky.. but what got Jingyi to feel so overly flustered and hot in the face was that smirk that played on Jin Ling's lips. That little smirk made the future sect leader look so much like his uncle that it made Jingyi feel all sorts of ways, but more than anything he felt weirdly intimidated. At the end he could only blurt out a few words in a matching tone to his state that it made Jin Ling chuckle because of how amused he was.

,,Why the hell would I?"

,,A-Yuan is your friend and his grip is slowly getting more loose.~"

,,Not my problem, is it? Just let it out already."

,,I can last for quite a while still. Honestly, I'm surprised of getting to know I last so much longer than you two with all of your special training. Mmh.. That felt good.."

Sizhui had unintentionally tightened his grip around the length he was tending to because Jin Ling's words made him feel quite embarrassed. They did release so quickly that it was a shame,.. Both of the Lan's then looked at a different part of the future sect leaders body: Jingyi at his face that distorted in pleasure as he rested his head back, while Sizhui looked down to where Jin Ling's hips had automatically and naturally moved into the grip. The oldest of the trio then pulled his hand away, staring at the pre-cum he had squeezed out of Jin Ling.

Other than before, Sizhui was now taking it all in far more deeply. It wasn't like he hadn't taken in what he had done before, but the worst "need" was gone, and he had done nothing the past 10 minutes or so than to jerk his friend off, feel him in his hand and.. yes, to his shame, he did stare, just like now at his hand. He only tore his gaze off of it as Jin Ling let out a deep, unsatisfied and questioning noise. And as he looked up just mentioned one's aura darkened further, the smirk growing dirtier and dirtier within a few mere seconds.

Jingyi could only watch the next scene then unfold. Jin Ling leaned in so slowly to the first bits of a mess he had created, holding eye contact as he licked his lust off of Sizhui's hand while grabbing the latters wrist. With the way the oldest one's breath audibly hitched, the expression matching that of a rabbit pushed into a corner by a wild dog or fox.. Jin Ling in turn staring just as intensely back at his prey as he mirrored what Sizhui had earlier done to him. Lips brushing together, head tilting to the side, lips meeting. It was a dangerous combination to have the youngest with his extreme craving for his first time, adding together with his still in the final round of puberty hormones, combining with the only one of them that had tasted the "honey" once but was holding himself back from tasting it again.

None of the three could really ignore the different kind of hunger that kept building and building between the two that really should've never ended up in such a situation together, after all..

The tongue dance that was going on between Jin Ling and Sizhui was different, the wet noises, soft yet hungry moans mixed in, fingers getting entangled in robes and hair. It would be a surprise if by the time their lips parted not a few scratch marks would be left behind.

,,If you keep touching me that way and staring the way you do I might misunderstand and think you're actually willing for more, A-Yuan.~"

Even the left out younger Lan couldn't help but tense, the thought running through his mind that after all Jin Ling was really like his uncle with how his behavior suddenly switched. The youngest ones tone was rough, deep - his expression so dirty and smug but weirdly provocative at the same time as he had broken the kiss and leaned back, stroking over his length loosely and clearly a more subconscious tease.


	141. Junior Trio | 11

,,How could I not want more? I'm the only one here that knows how it all feels after all.."

As red in the face and as flustered as Sizhui was, he still spoke up only a few moments after staring at Jin Ling wide-eyed in a tone with a certain ache to it. For a moment he glanced over at Jingyi, the latter had grown rather silent, yet he was tending to himself again and Sizhui figured that his friend - as much of a big-talker as he was - wasn't ready for quite a few things yet. It wasn't until Sizhui felt a hand on his thigh, soon followed from it travelling to a certain direction that his gaze flickered back and got fixed again on Jin Ling - who in turn let their eyes meet, pulling on his lower lip as he let his gaze go back and forth between staring at Sizhui and then to his own lower half twice; as if to hint at something.

,,Then take what you want, A-Yuan.~"

The youngest of the trio was gone out, at this point he didn't even take note of how weirdly intoxicating and luring his voice had turned out to be as he let go of himself while his other hand teasingly and loosely tended to Sizhui. - It was exactly that tone that made the smallest then move, leaning in as he got a hold of the future sect leaders tip area, acting as if he was about to kiss just mentioned one again.. Which he didn't, instead just as their lips were brushing together he leaned down to Jin Ling's neck, leaving a few little pecks there as well as on his friends exposed chest.

Neither Jingyi nor the youngest could really figure out for a few moments what the other was about to do. At some point the younger Lan even closed his eyes, not noticing for a while that Sizhui had changed his position so that he was on his knees beside the future sect leader while he bent over. In between of all of that there was a part of Jin Ling that grew so overly restless and excited, he was twitching here and there as after Sizhui had adjusted he went back to stroking over his friends length while the other..

,,Fuck.."

Only when Jin Ling let out such a overwhelmed, pleasured sounding curse did the "left out" one open his eyes again.. However, Jingyi truly didn't expect to see what he did. his fellow sect member was tending to the youngest with his mouth, not a lot but the upper third was getting tended to. In between Sizhui used his hand to make up for what he simply couldn't take in from Jin Ling's length. What really got to Jingyi though was that look on the future sect leaders face.. the pleasure was so visible, it must've been the first time that he saw the "mistress" so relaxed and calm.

,,You find my lower half that tempting, mh?~"

As the initial "shock wave" of pleasure subsided, Jin Ling spoke up in the same tone as before again.. just that the hum Sizhui let out in return got him quite good. When he spoke up again his tone was a little more desperate, but not any less dirty and rough in sound as due to it being a first time it didn't take much for Jin Ling to start letting out soft noises of pleasure in between and after.

,,I don't know what's gotten into you.. but don't stop."

~💙~

Jingyi kept watching as the scene began to grow messier.. He had a perfect view on everything that was going on, how the youngest ones breathing changed, making his quite toned upper body move - Sizhui's head and hand sooner or later starting to move up and down more in sync. The moans Jin Ling let out a second or two later resulting in a muffled one from the oldest in return. Jingyi had gathered at some point that the future sect leader must be tending to Sizhui with his hand at the same time.. and they only kept riling one another up like that more and more.

He only snapped somewhat out of his daze in which he was trapped to the point of not even being able to feel jealous for not receiving the same kind of pleasure as Jin Ling lifted his free hand - gesturing for the left out one to come closer. Only as Jingyi then moved a few seconds later did Jin Ling open his eyes that were so clouded from the pleasure he was feeling that the younger Lan felt himself staring into them for a moment..

It wasn't only a moment, it was a moment too long. The second oldest didn't even notice the smirk that ended up playing on Jin Ling's lips as the next thing Jingyi really knew was that he got pulled closer - the usually fighting duo's lips crushing together as just as before with Sizhui, Jin Ling was now devouring him.. and honestly, those deep and rough moans the future sect leader let out into his mouth made Jingyi's own situation not the slightest bit better. He couldn't even recall the last time when he had leaked as much as he did now, his hand still tending to his own length as one of Jin Ling's held onto the back of his neck - not that Jingyi needed to be held in place, he wouldn't move right now as not long after he began to let out a few more shy like sounds of pleasure himself.

Sizhui honestly didn't even know what had gotten into him. There was just something about the length of the youngest of the trio, something about how different yet weirdly similar their backgrounds were that.. made him really wish to make Jin Ling feel something good for once. More than either of his friends the one with his many secrets knew how great this type of workout could feel. Maybe the way he was raised also had a part in the fact that he was simply more open, he didn't even feel disgusted or repelled by what he was doing.


	142. Junior Trio | 12

Jin Ling was on such a high from the sensations and sounds all over him, his mind had entirely shut off, and he would probably later on - in a sober state - question how he had even managed to do all the things he had done in sync in the midst of it all. The sensation coming from his length especially was something he couldn't describe, not that he needed to or would be able to talk about it anyway. He was other than usually also rather honest, not caring about letting his voice out or anything like that..

He only broke the kiss once for a short moment as the sucks and rubs over his length grew slower. Glancing at Sizhui, he could see his friend tense and shiver in quite the telling manner.. as he looked over at Jingyi, who stared at him with a look full of craving, there was quite the boost going through him. At the end his gaze flickered back to Sizhui however as he felt motions he wasn't all too familiar with and sure enough, the oldest was so close once again by this point that he had started to move his hips into the grip. - For a few more moments Sizhui struggled with trying so desperately to keep tending to Jin Ling, yet at the end he pulled his head away. Resting his forehead onto his arm his second release hit him as the next wave of tension followed from a bad shiver took him over.

The youngest was just about to speak up, but just as he opened his mouth Sizhui had already collected himself as much as he could and went back to devouring him again. Both the strokes and sucking motions so much more eager and full of want now that Jin Ling put his hand that had tended to Sizhui until his release was over on the back of the oldest ones head. - From there on everything began to get clouded for the future sect leader. His fingers had gotten entangled into Sizhui's undone hair, eyes closed shut as he felt his own knot really form now, so intensely it was almost painful. Jin Ling only glanced over at Jingyi for a few seconds once as the younger Lan let out a choked noise and.. the future sect leader couldn't help but let out a soft huff of a laugh as Jingyi released for the second time that night before collapsing backwards onto the ground.

~💙~

,,You should.. slowly let go of me,.. A-Yuan."

Jin Ling didn't last for a short while, yet in comparison to how long he could usually endure without a struggle that right now was really nothing. He felt his knot quite intensely at this point, pressing out his words in between of heavy breaths and moans.. The only response he got however was that Sizhui tightened the grip around him, which in turn made the youngest suck in a breath as his hips moved up for a moment. His free hand was at this point clenched into a fist by his side, the other tugging on his friends hair as he began to curse and tense more and more often.

The situation around his lower half had grown so messy by then. He could feel the wetness almost everywhere, his mind going more and more blank.. and a few minutes later the youngest of them tensed for a last time as he finally tipped over the edge as well while tensing and choking a final curse. - Sizhui could barely cope with the load the future sect leader ended up releasing into his mouth. He had expected a lot, not that much however, yet as hard as it was he kept going almost all the way through before pulling away and stroking as well as squeezing the remaining bits of cum out of Jin Ling's twitching length. The smallest had tasted his friend before during the kiss, also here and there during his workout yet.. it were really two different worlds to have a slight taste or the entire load to handle but honestly by then he felt so pleased with himself for managing to get his friend off that it didn't quite matter and was more of a boost than anything.

,,A-Yuan."

,,Mmh?"

Just like before as soon as Sizhui looked up Jin Ling had pulled the hand he had used to wipe his mouth with away. The youngest ones voice had sounded so raspy and breathless, yet the way in which he pulled Sizhui in and went about tasting himself with such a wild, messy and hungry kiss made it clear that the future sect leader was anything but tired. Sizhui didn't feel much better, he could easily go for three more rounds - other than Jingyi who had probably more passed out than fallen asleep at this point.

After a while of making out the way they did, unaware of their surroundings, the situation only kept getting more dangerously heated as the taller one of them pulled Sizhui on his lap. There was a moment of intense staring before they slammed their lips back together, Jin Ling's hands kneading and grabbing onto the older ones ass. Not much was clear, yet one thing was and that was that they both wanted sex so much they were melting away as the future sect leader pulled the other closer, pressing Sizhui's hips down quite roughly as he grinded against him at the same time. There were a lot of noises coming from them, moans, breathing so heavy and rough..

~💙~

,,We should stop.."

Sizhui sounded how they both felt, neither wanted to stop. By then the younger one had changed their position, in between of one of their many heated as anything kisses.. The Lan disciple was now lying on his back, Jin Ling above him, between Sizhui's propped up legs, hips grinding against one another. It was unclear if Jin Ling had broken the kiss because he had thought what his friend ended up saying out loud, or because he was about to take another step. After a moment Jin Ling then dropped his head, his body tense, propped up on his elbows he spoke up with his struggle being so audible that Sizhui couldn't help but smile so softly.

,,I know we should.. But I don't think I can."

,,We're going to regret this, A-Ling.."

,,You mean "I"."

,,Mh?"

,,You try to say it's going to be us regretting anything after now but in truth you're just trying to be nice. You don't want me to spend my life regretting because I have to do what I have to do in my life and so on."

The older one of them couldn't quite say anything against the assumption the future sect leader had made. After all they had already begun to play matchmaker for a relationship between their uncles that clearly wouldn't lead in any heirs being brought into this world and well.. All he could do was look up at the one that had grown so much taller than him as just mentioned one let out an almost bitter sounding chuckle.


	143. Junior Trio | 13

,,I wonder if I'll ever have one thing or just an hour in my life where I'll have something I actually want.. Not something I'm forced to have from birth, or forced to do, or forced to want.. A tiny bit of freedom for myself.."

,,A-Ling-"

,,Forget it. Forget I said that."

Before Sizhui could even say another word or reach out the younger one of them had already gotten up and walked off. There was something about the heavy-hearted and almost frustrated tone in Jin Ling's voice that caused the Lan disciple to sigh, staring at the ceiling as he covered himself with his robe. The more he thought, however, the less all of that was like his friend.. sure, here and there Jin Ling had shown emotions.. but he wasn't quite the type to talk about serious matters at all. Especially not when it came to sect matters, more often than not he did mention something about his parents but well. Letting out a heavy breath the older one of them then got up from the ground, grabbing a jar of liquor he made his way into the future sect leaders bedroom - only to find the latter sitting on the edge on one side of his bed, arms propped up on his thighs and face buried in his hands.

,,I'm sorry.."

,,For what?"

Jin Ling only looked to the side where his friend had sat down after letting out the heaviest of breaths, dropping his arms on his lap with his expression being hard to read. Sizhui, however, was staring at the jar in his hand, speaking after giving it a second thought in the same quiet yet gentle like tone.

,,I didn't mean to interrupt you or stop you from confiding into me.. I just didn't want your thoughts to go into such a dark direction because I thought or acted like I knew what is best for you more than you.."

,,It's not like it's the first time I've thought that way.. I don't even know why I had to bring it up,.. maybe I'm just so desperate at this point that I tried to get something I decide and want on my own through your pity before.."

,,Before you lose your chance to do so once you've taken over the LanLing Jin Sect."

Sizhui couldn't quite make out whether the taller one was so open due to the alcohol, or maybe just because his "time was running out", or more plausible reasons or even everything combining. Before Jin Ling said the last sentence he had taken the jar out of Sizhui's hand, only nodding after a second or two had passed in response to what his friend had said as he swallowed the alcohol down. Something inside Sizhui told him that if he wouldn't keep applying the tiniest amounts of pressure now the once in a lifetime chance to actually talk with the future sect leader like that would be gone and away, and so he just kept pushing their conversation forward.

,,Then.. when did you have such thoughts for the first time?"

,,I don't really know.. Until I started to grow up I guess I categorized all of that as what anyone sane would call simple bratty behavior.."

,,It wasn't?"

Like most of the time Jin Ling hesitated, thought, then replied - this time after shaking his head. His tone mature yet rather empty.

,,I honestly woke up a few times and I actually questioned what on earth I was doing.. Looking back now, I think even though I didn't have a clue about what I was trying to get it was… always something between trying to prove myself and trying to be free.. I can't even recall how many times I ran away, simply because if I did as told or went out with allowance I'd always be supervised because I am nothing but the future sect leader that has to this and that.. Pathetic, I know."

,,It's not. You want to be taken in as yourself for once, or just be yourself without all of those official matters you're unable to shake off."

,,I have all the luxury on earth, yet I don't have the luxury of living.."

,,A-Ling.."

,,I sound like a maiden in distress, I guess A-Yi isn't all that wrong with calling me a mistress at the end of the day."

The self-mockery in the younger ones tone, the chuckle he let out that was so full of disgust towards himself - it rubbed Sizhui the wrong way. Slapping Jin Ling on the arm he turned and spoke a little louder and a lot more seriously than before.

,,Yes you are a man. Yes you are the future sect leader of your fathers sect. But you're also and first of all human, don't look down on yourself because of it."

,,How am I not supposed to look down on that side of me or try to erase it when with each thing I want I am nothing "but"? How on earth am I supposed to find a way to have both or just a hint of freedom to live when everything I hear is "Don't forget your purpose in life", "You should slowly find a wife", "You are, you are, you are"? I can't even actually decide which room I want to live in, or which maiden I want to marry because even though they give me 10 options they're all carefully selected, just from the best sects and everything they want."

,,Then what do you want? As you - not the son of, or the future sect leader of, or the nephew of, or whatever else?"

For the next two to three minutes Sizhui sat there, watching his friend slowly but surely more or less fall apart and drown in the misery he tried to endure and cope with for longer than he was probably even aware of. For a moment Jin Ling had stared at the smaller one, then he looked at his hands that were folded hanging down between his legs.. He couldn't come up with a reply, all he could do was stare at his hands and shrug and shake his head.


	144. Junior Trio | 14

,,I don't know.. I really don't know, A-Yuan.."

Just like the future sect leaders voice cracked, something inside the older one shattered as well as Jin Ling had turned his head.. and his expression, especially his light colored eyes showed nothing but emptiness and despair mixed with the unsuccessful search for an answer. There were tears welling up inside the taller males eyes as he opened and closed his mouth, again clearly trying to find words he wasn't able to find before he then spoke in a tone matching to his over all state.

,,A-Yuan, I really don't know.. As hard as I try to find an answer, as hard as I have tried over the past one and a half years.. there's a voice inside of me, that tells me not to go into that direction.. to stop trying to find something for nothing, only to find more suffering than I'm already enduring daily.. I feel this heavy weight on my chest, almost as if I have chains around me I'm unaware of whenever I try to even think of finding something I want for myself.. Even a wife.. I always end up thinking that I shouldn't - or that I should choose from those that were already selected to fit my sects sake to still look into them and try to find the best option.."

Sizhui didn't know what to say at this point either.. There was a part of him that bashed onto himself for having stopped his friend when he was at the verge of being unable to control himself.. then there was the side that told him it was the right decision, that if he would've let Jin Ling continue with what they both had wanted at the end.. if he was already that miserable now, when it came to just trying to find something he wanted himself, how would it have been for his friend to wake up after having had what he wanted while it might lead to a nightmare for his sect? It was really a mess of a horrible situation.

,,Maybe you should ask for some time off from your studies so you can think about everything..?"

The suggestion Sizhui made only caused Jin Ling to chuckle again, in the same bitter way from before.

,,I can already think of the extra hours I'll need to work once I allow myself to ask for allowance to study in Gusu. It's literally only studying more, but even that.. Forget it, the more I think about all of that the harder it'll be to push it out of my mind and I'll need to in a day and a half either way."

,,I won't forget about it and I won't stop talking about it either.. if it wouldn't matter you wouldn't have brought it up and if you could just not give a damn then you wouldn't be trying to get my attention through pity like you're claiming either. Didn't we say that we don't want to let out sects continue to run the way they did until now? Then why are you trying to force yourself to not be human?"

,,You really don't get that I'm fucking afraid, do you?"

Even though the younger one had raised his voice minimally, his eyes red from the tears he was holding back.. Sizhui couldn't stop his eyes from falling shut for a mere second as he let out such a relieved breath before speaking up in a tone to match as he took one of his friends hands in his own.

,,I know that but how is anyone supposed to help you if you never say how you feel, A-Ling? If I would've just continued throwing my assumptions out as if they're facts.. wouldn't you have sooner or later thrown a fit because I'm right and me.. us all knowing it is just worse and making you more afraid and stressed than you already are?"

,,You have no idea how hard it is to play a role you never even wanted while drowning out who you actually are.. this constant act, I've played it for so long that I don't know who I would be if I wouldn't be the son of, the future sect leader of, the nephew of,.. The feeling of no one knowing who you are beneath the titles and surface.."

Maybe Sizhui should've taken a different path at this point. Maybe he should've come clean and said that he knew perfectly fine how it felt. That he was anything but the person he portrayed, the person he believed to be and was made to believe to be for 13 years and more.. However, he couldn't. It could lead to a nightmare at some point if after confiding into him his friend would get to know who he really was - another reason why the older one of them had tried to stop this strange something that had been going on between them.. Yet he didn't say a word, he couldn't tear Jin Ling apart any more than he already was as he reached out to wipe this one tear out of his friends face that meant so much more and weighed so much more than a single drop of salty water shed from a not even 18 year old should.


	145. Junior Trio | 15

At the end Sizhui refrained from saying anything as Jin Ling dropped his head, leaning it into his touch. It was really such a painful thing to watch, how the entire pressure of his fate seemed to torture the younger one. Once a few seconds had passed, the Lan Sect disciple then gently lifted Jin Ling's head up, a finger on his chin as without even a word being said Sizhui leaned back in. Almost as soon as their lips met the Jin Ling let out a breath that was a mixture of a relieved one and a choke,.. Sizhui wasn't dumb, he was perfectly aware of the fact that if Jingyi would've been awake still, and he had fallen asleep instead the youngest of the trio would've clung to him. It didn't matter really who it was, the gender, or sect.. Jin Ling simply needed someone to cling to, someone to let go with, a bit of falling apart, so he could puzzle himself together for.. well, anything between a few months with luck and with little a few weeks or days at least.

,,What do you want? Right now, don't think."

They had barely managed to tear their lips apart, the kiss was so different - full of need, but clearly not purely the sexual kind. As soon as the older one of them noticed that his friend was about to think he brushed their lips together again, Jin Ling's hand dropping from the nape he had gotten a hold of once more. His tone sounding so exhausted and tired as he spoke, on a level deeper than just physically.

,,Can we just.. do something for a while longer?"

,,Something?"

,,Touching you.. getting touched.. I don't really care.."

,,Alright, lay down.~"

The confused look Jin Ling gave him was really quite adorable, the smaller male had taken the liquor away from him, placing it on the ground beside the bed before smiling this angelic like one that only a "true" Lan should have inherited.

,,What's with Senior Wen?"

,,Don't worry.. He always disappears on a night no matter the sect we were in so far.. I don't really know what he's doing, but I know he won't come back any time soon."

The future sect leader was just about to say something else, but his hesitation had caused Sizhui to push him over and down on the bed.. At the point where the older male then sat down on his lap, for sure Jin Ling's virgin mind shut off as he laid there rather tensely yet with his gaze flickering all over his friends barely from the robe covered body.

,,I won't go too far."

Sizhui couldn't help but chuckle at how serious the taller one tried to sound, just as much as he was unable to hide the doubt and amusement with a slight tease in his tone of voice.

,,I thought so as well a few years back.. That was until I felt what I naturally craved the most around my fingers for the first time..~"

,,You're not a maiden though.."

,,Hanguang-Jun isn't a maiden either, yet he still cooks and cleans."

,,Oh my goodness.. mention anything, but not our families right now.."

The Lan Sect Disciple snorted a little laugh as his friend covered his own face with his hands, only to get a glare thrown at him because of it. Not that Sizhui minded it, he went about a gentle and slow little routine that went from a kiss, on to the younger males neck, collarbones and chest.. When he arrived with his mouth and his tickling soft breath at Jin Ling's toned stomach and more so sides however the twitching of the muscles and the buckling of the others hips made him stop. Glancing up for a moment the cheeky smaller male then placed another peck on his friends stomach, watching the same reaction happen again. While Jin Ling hid his face behind his arm Sizhui then had to ask what he had almost got confirmed by then.

,,A-Ling?"

,,Mh?"

,,Are you.. mayhaps ticklish?"

There was nothing coming from the younger one in response other than deathly silence, as far as Sizhui could take note of it he didn't even breath. The temptation was just too much to not act on it, using the unawareness of his friend the older one out of nowhere began quite the intense tickle attack - with success, because Jin Ling ended up being a tensing and wiggling mess, like a fish on land.. just that he was laughing and getting more and more breathless in between. For a few minutes Jin Ling coped, yet at the end he grabbed the smaller one by the waist and flung them over, so he was on top. And there was it again, this intense as anything eye contact as they stared from one anothers eyes to lips, Sizhui's hands on the younger ones waistline.. They weren't able to endure the building tension for too long really, and once their lips slammed together the future sect leader pressed himself down against his friends lower half. The moan they let out was both full of relief and hunger as their tongues met again yet sadly it didn't last for too long as Jin Ling pulled away, whispering in a dirty and "telling" tone.

,,I'm only going to say it once.. Start touching me properly.. I don't know how long I'll be able to keep my head clear if the stimulation is lacking and everything just keeps.."

,,Bottling up? I understand, I just couldn't help myself.. Honestly my self-restraint will be wavering as well if we keep ending up with you pushing me down or the other way around - I don't even want to know how you must feel with it all right now.."

,,I feel like an animal to be honest.. the more we end up in strange positions the less my mind is clear and only going into one direction.. and the urge for it only gets worse.."

,,Lay back down."

For a moment Jin Ling looked at the other, clearly trying to figure out if his friend was plotting something strange again.. at the end he gave in anyway and laid down on his back.

~💙~

It was a good thing that Wen Ning didn't come back into the room that night. The two young men completely lost track not long after Sizhui's hand was tending to the future sect leader again.. They ended up being all over one another throughout half the night, tipping one another over the edge, holding onto each other and well.. If it hadn't been for a natural instinct deep down inside of Jin Ling that told him he wouldn't be able to fit himself into the tightness of the smaller male then who knew how it would've ended still. Even when thinking back to it, they wouldn't be able to really pinpoint how they ended up being so lost in the moment that Jin Ling had two of his fingers deeply and passionately thrusting inside Sizhui.. yet regardless of neither of them acting on it the next morning, it was such a overwhelming experience for each of them in his own way. The bedroom had been so full of their pleasured noises, wet sounds, and it smelled so much like lust and sex that even without the mess on the sheets it would be hard to cover up.

They fell asleep at some point without even being truly aware of all the things they had done. The pleasure they had felt made them both shut their minds off entirely.. which really wasn't the worst thing in the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't even know what happened with this update but it just kept getting longer and longer and I was like.. I have to post and end this at some point. So here we are, if anyone wants to read more drop a comment and I'll try to work something out.
> 
> I'm reaching the point at the moment where I'm like "f* it, I just want them all to get laid and be happy" so I apologise for all the trailing off that might happen still but it'll work out and play a role for the second part of the story.


	146. Wen Ning/Nie Huaisang | 1

The one thing that neither Wei Wuxian nor anyone else "close" to Wen Ning knew about was that no matter the sect they had been at in the past year and a half, he always went out on a walk he needed to go on for himself. Walking around the sects gardens and over all property as almost no one was awake any longer.. Even though it had a tiny bit of sightseeing to it, in the end Wen Ning always ended up in the ancestral halls, kowtowing and apologizing for all the wrong he has done in his second "life" - but also the wrong the main Wen branch had done, the wrong his own branch didn't stop from happening. Maybe it was wrong, or even pathetic, yet he needed to do that for himself. Partially to find his inner peace, but also because apologizing and begging for forgiveness was pretty much all he could do at this point.

Wen Ning hadn't had the chance yet to go over his usual routine, or more so ritual, at the Nie Sect.. Which he now wanted to change, knowing that at the last night of the festivity he probably wouldn't get the chance to do so either and with how the situation in the Juniors room had turned out..

After an hour, maybe two, of walking through the Nie Sect's garden, Wen Ning then did what could lead a lot of them into trouble as he pushed one of the doors to the hall of the important and deceased - that he knew was only there for "show" - after taking a last look around to make sure no one was in sight.. Well, as silently as Wen Ning went about opening the door, due to that he also froze rather quickly once he heard noises coming from inside that made it clear he was anything but alone. Standing there, torn between knowing he should leave and hearing what he did.. At the end he opened the door the tiniest crack further, looking inside but his attempt to make out whether or not he knew the man that was sobbing his heart out led to nothing.

Wen Ning felt quite terrible, or knew he would've done so even more if he would be alive still, for lurking.. It wasn't like him necessarily, yet as contradicting as it was to his initial plan to stay hidden and all, it was even less like him to just watch someone have a breakdown and simply leave. With that being said, opening the door just as silently a bit further, so he could go inside, Wen Ning then hesitantly walked to where the man was slumped over on the ground. Just like the man didn't seem to notice him, Wen Ning couldn't make out who the person was, or even the altar of whom the man was crying for due to how little light was in the room.

,,Excuse me.. Are you alright? Do you-.. Oh, Sect Leader Nie.."

Only when Wen Ning spoke up did the one on the ground look at him, they were both equally as shocked to see one another. Nie Huaisang sat up and wiped his face rather quickly once the taller male had recognized him, trying to act it all out with clearing his throat - not that it made his terrible sounding voice any less unstable and hoarse.

,,How can I help you? What brought you here, master Wen?"

There were many things Wen Ning wasn't good at, yet having a conversation was one of the things he struggled the most with.. that now adding together with the sect leader acting as if he hadn't just been caught during a major breakdown and the over all situation.. The taller one of them really didn't know what to do as he stood there playing with his fingers while awkwardly looking around. After a few moments of thinking Wen Ning then simply spoke the truth, more so because in the panic he couldn't come up with a lie anyway.

,,I.. I should've asked you first.. and maybe you won't.. you won't agree.. but I.. I intended to.. apologise for what.. for what I may have done wrong to your sect.."

Wen Ning was about to add the typical honorific still, maybe ask for forgiveness for his rudeness of just intruding and so forth as well - yet for the first time in years his stutter was really coming out again, and so he paused as he noticed how intensely the sect leader was staring at him. As if he was trying to scan him, Huaisang's expression both confused and surprised, but now where he had looked at Wen Ning directly for a few seconds the latter was clearly able to see that the a tad younger one hadn't only cried for a minute more than likely.

,,I see.. I appreciate the gesture yet.. there weren't too many losses of the Qinghe Nie Sect.. and those that we did lose, it isn't like it was your fault, master Wen.. I don't quite understand why you would wish to apologize and ask for forgiveness under those circumstances.."

The taller one of them hesitated for a short moment, he had never mentioned wanting to ask for forgiveness - at the end he was torn between thinking it must've either been a plausible conclusion, or a slip of the sect leaders tongue.. similar to something he wished to do himself, but wasn't able to. Wen Ning hadn't met Huaisang often, yet he was able to somehow gather that the younger male probably had drank a bit too much; which seemed to be a common problem that day. Before he could even explain himself however, the sect leader spoke up himself again while getting up from the ground and fixing his robe that was made of only the best materials, yet none he would usually wear.

,,I apologise, I wasn't thinking before saying that. I should appreciate the gesture, and I understand that at the end of the day you're kind and even if it was not your decision at the time they were still losses caused from your hand. I give you the allowance, now.. Excuse me."


	147. Wen Ning/Nie Huaisang | 2

,,Sect leader,.. I don't want to.. to seem nosy or disrespectful but... but.. Are you really alright?.. Sh-.. Shall I accompany you to your room?"

Wen Ning wasn't quite a "people person".. but somehow, it didn't sit well with him to let someone who wasn't only intoxicated but also in the middle of a mental situation and to top it off knowingly rather weak walk around in the midst of the night all alone. The sect leader had by then began to walk out of the hall, yet as Wen Ning said what he did he paused.. hand tightening the grip around the expensive fan he was holding, teeth gritted, head hanging slightly. It took a bit before Wen Ning began to hear something, a whisper that gradually went louder until it finally sank in that Huaisang was repeating "If I'm alright? Are you serious?" over and over again. The realization that the sect leader was clearly talking himself into a state of rage came too late though, as the next thing Wen Ning knew was that the fan Nie Huaisang threw at him barely missed his head - yet he wasn't quite able to focus on that due to how the other was shouting at him with his tone full of bitterness and heartache.

,,If I am alright?! Who even cares?! Who cares about the Qinghe Nie sect?! Who cares about our problems?! Who on earth cares about us?! No one. Not a single fucking person truly does!"

Wen Ning didn't even know what was really happening as all he could do was stand there.. It wasn't like he had ever been close to the Nie Sect leader, yet he did know that that behavior really wasn't like the one that just kept shouting and raging.

,,Everyone always came to my brother for help. Everyone always acted like they fucking loved and respected him so much - and?! No one even cared about his death. The only thing that mattered was that the waste of our entire world took over his place. As if he never even existed. No one gave a damn, not even Zewu-Jun."

At this point Nie Huaisang began to close the gap between himself and the older one, not that it stopped him from shouting - not that the tears that ran all over his face at this point stopped him from doing so. All Wen Ning could do was let it happen, listen and back off somewhat at least until he couldn't back off any further because he didn't want to step on an altar to do so.

,,At the end no one cares. No one cares about my loss. No one cares about the fact that my brother was torn to pieces and I have to go through the loss again and again because of how badly he was hurt. No one even took note of the fact that I am completely alone.. And you, you of all people.."

It was strange, but Wen Ning had realized short before Nie Huaisang stood right in front of him, staring up at him with his bloodshot eyes full of hatred and pain that that was where the whole conversation was heading. He just wasn't aware of how far the sect leader would go.

,,Who do you think you are?! No one cared about the fact that because of you.. because of your damned sect the only two friends I ever had lost their mind.. their family.. their life's.. No one cared about the fact that everything is your fault. If it hadn't been for your sect.. Why.. Why.."

Wen Ning was unable to move even as Huaisang slapped and punched him repeatedly against the chest, the attacks getting weaker as at the point where the sect leader could only sob out impossible to count "Why's" he slowly sank to the ground. It was a horrible situation, the last the taller one of them had ever thought to end up in and so completely out of nowhere as well.. At the end Wen Ning closed his eyes as Huaisang clung onto his robe, sobbing and crying his heart out as he knelt there on the ground with his head resting between his arms.

,,Why are you standing here and not him.. Why are you able to live, why are you allowed to live even though you're the same as him.. Why does no one care to relieve Da-Ge from his pain.. but you.. you out of all people are allowed to.. you can live and be happy while my brother... Why.."

,,Sect Leader.."

As hard as he tried, Wen Ning could barely manage to make his voice sound calming as he had knelt down.. His try to either comfort the younger one, or at least get him back onto his two feet however only resulted in Nie Huaisang lashing out at him again with both words and physical attacks. Telling the taller one to "Shut up" or to leave him alone, more why's and harmful words that Wen Ning couldn't disagree with while at the same time he knew that the situation was bigger than what meets the eye. At some point Wen Ning had managed to get a hold of the sect leaders wrist, watching the last bits of wiggling and trying to struggle himself free before Nie Huaisang then collapsed against his chest. Once the fighting had stopped and the smaller male was nothing but a sobbing mess Wen Ning then let go of the others wrists, only for the latter to cling to his robe as he tensed and shook in between of his breakdown almost as if he was having a seizure.

,,Sect leader..?"

Wen Ning tried again to talk to the mess of a man, this time in an attempt to sound like a question.. He really didn't know how to handle the situation, the only person he had ever truly comforted was his nephew and those were completely different matters as well as times. To his surprise however a few moments after he had spoken up, he could faintly make out two words getting said in between of the sobbing.

,,I'm sorry.."


	148. Wen Ning/Nie Huaisang | 3

There was a bit of awkward like silence going out from the taller one of them, he was looking around the hall as if trying to spot something - or someone - who would help him. Of course, there was no one.. and so all Wen Ning could do was place one of his cold, rather big yet not too masculine hands onto the sect leaders back, too afraid to move it because.. He simply wasn't confident enough when it came to the control over his strength in combination with a person that had just poked at a few mental scars of his intentionally and at others unintentionally - yet at the end Wen Ning still said a little comforting phrase before silence broke out between them once more.. or well, Nie Huaisang's breakdown didn't stop so there were sobs and coughs audible in midst of other noises.

,,There's no need for an apology.. I understand."

It should've been comforting to hear such a phrase getting directed at him more than once within not even that many hours.. but honestly something inside him shattered more because of this phrase. He wasn't even sure what he had expected, or wanted at this point.. Had he hoped to get killed right there and then? Or to at least get a slap? Be left alone, once again? Or was it that he simply wanted and ached to get yelled at from someone like the brother he missed so much had always done? Nie Huaisang really didn't know, yet he cried for quite a while before eventually calming down enough so there was only the weakness and trembling left in between of quiet sobs and sniffing.

,,Sect leader Nie.. Are you.. Are you able to move?"

,,I'm fine.."

Wen Ning didn't quite believe the statement made in this broken tone of voice, watching closely as the - technically - younger one let go of him. As Huaisang then paused and tried to get up only to fail in his attempt Wen Ning reached out so the other at least wouldn't collide with the ground too harshly.

,,May I help you?"

As the smaller one tried to get up again, Wen Ning got up as well, still staring and an arm hovering beside Huaisang.

,,I said I'm fine!"

Just like at the first attempt, the sect leader was barely able to hold himself on his own two feet - yet as the taller one reached out to try and support him he lashed out once again.. only to feel his head spin from the quick motion he made as he slapped the Wen remnants arm away.

It wasn't like Nie Huaisang wasn't aware of how badly he was behaving towards someone who didn't quite deserve to receive all the aggression for the way more than one person had made him feel.. But even as this time Wen Ning reached out and lifted him up, more out of reflex, the smaller one still couldn't help but lash out again - slamming his hand against the others' chest while shouting just like moments earlier.

,,Let me go!"

,,I have no intention of harming you, Sect leader.. but it would be better if you would refrain from lashing out at me so many times in a row.."

Wen Ning only spoke up after a few moments of having stood there without moving even the tiniest bit. He wasn't able to feel a lot of emotions, but he was what he was only due to the negative and resentful emotions he had kept in for all his life - and being provoked like that without Wei Ying around, after having been yelled at and punched and forced to recall so many things all at once really... made him feel uneasy. He didn't even intend for his words to sound like a threat, it was more of a warning or advice since he was mostly unaware of how he would react in certain situations and.. yeh, he was probably somewhat afraid of getting to know, just as much as of himself. If he were able to do so still, he would've let out a relieved as anything sigh when the sect leader stopped moving almost in an instant after he had said what he did.

,,Wh-.. Where is your.. your room?"

,,My room?"

Huaisang couldn't quite make out yet if he was irritated from the stutter that the living corpse couldn't suppress at all times. Right now he was also too startled as he stared up at the one that was quite a bit taller than him with his flustered state being visible on his face just as much as it had been audible in his voice.. to really notice when it was harder for Wen Ning to control it. While the with porn obsessed ones mind wandered places however Wen Ning looked down for a short moment with his unchanging expression, speaking in his nothing telling tone - that really didn't help the younger one figure out the questions he had in his mind that ranged from "What does he plan to do with me?", to "Is he even able to-".

,,You do not wish to rest here, or?.. The times might've changed yet you are still not the.. the most well liked and you have no weapon.."

,,Oh.."

The younger ones last thought had gotten interrupted by the other explaining, and Huaisang looked down almost immediately - he felt so embarrassed for coming to the completely wrong conclusions and for once in his life he regretted his porn addiction quite a bit.

,,It's in the main wing.. The upper floor.."

It took more than a second before Huaisangs shock then subsided, so he could speak up again his tone other than before somewhat shy now just as panicked as flustered. Wen Ning had simply begun to walk, carrying him without saying a word, through the hall and outside.

,,Wh-.. What are you doing?!"

,,I'm escorting you to your room, Se-.. Sect leader."

,,What if someone sees us? Aren't you worried about what they might think?"

When Wen Ning finally paused in his steps, the younger one held back a relieved breath - his expectations about being let down and the other understanding were shattered within a few seconds though as Wen Ning spoke up while beginning to walk once more.

,,They might think I'm about to kill you.. or that I might have harmed you already."


	149. Wen Ning/Nie Huaisang | 4

The words the other said only caused a different wave of panic to drown Nie Huaisang, yet after a moment he shook his head as the louder voice yelled again.. This situation really looked like anything but not threatening. Him getting carried like a maiden that had fainted, an arm around the taller ones neck, his hand clinging to the others sleeve.. adding together with the robes of Wen Ning that he had somewhat pulled apart due to all the struggling and wiggling around while he himself looked like a mess all over - that looked like anything but not like what this "huge idiot" responded. The sect leader kept thinking all sorts of things, only realizing how much time had passed and how far they had gotten as Wen Ning spoke up again as he paused in his steps.

,,Which room?"

,,What?.. Oh!.. Uhm.. there's only one door to the left.."

Like before, Wen Ning didn't say a word in return. He only walked to the room, opened the door, went inside and then put the smaller male down right beside a chair so he could sit on it.

,,I'm going to prepare a bath."

,,You don't have to-"

For a moment Huaisang clenched his fist around his fan, trying hard to suppress the urge to throw it after the one that was just.. He couldn't understand what was wrong with this guy. Either he said nothing, stuttered, or completely ignored him. One second this completely off and weirdly gentle like behavior then.. At the end Huaisang did throw his fan, but onto the bed. He wasn't really much of a tsundere like Jiang Cheng, but he had his own.. ticks, so to speak - especially when he was as wasted as he was right now and confronted with someone like Wen Ning who seemed to be even stranger than his brother, Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian combined. Bopping his leg up and down, the sect leader let out a frustrated groan before getting up to grab another bottle of liquor - drinking it while continuing to sulk.

~💙~

,,Sect-"

A bit of time had passed since the taller one of them had disappeared.. and when Huaisang heard the rather unfamiliar and emotionless tone start to call out for him only to cut off abruptly followed from a rather loud bumping noise.. Well, as the younger one turned his head with his expression being something between irritated and annoyed at first his gaze wandered around for a moment or two before he managed to spot the stranger face down lying on the floor. It was rather terrible to do so but as the sect leader blinked, watching Wen Ning trying to clumsily get back up in this stiff manner he couldn't hold back a bit of a laugh.

,,I'm sorry.."

,,I should be. Why did you call out for me master Wen?"

Even though he hadn't made it noticeable, Huaisang did take note of the fact that before apologizing and even after the taller one kept bowing to him - which really only made more questions pop up in his mind. Wouldn't the natural reaction be to try and cover the mishap up with standing back upright as soon as possible? Why was that guy apologizing when he was supposed to? Was he thinking that badly of him secretly that he feared getting up? Or.. What had happened in this poor fellows' life that he turned out this way, unable to escape it even in death and so many years after having died?

Over all the "headshaker" was probably one of the few people who were truly, and probably a bit too deeply, interested in anything related to the Ghost General. He had never understood how so few people seemed to have all the questions in mind he had instantly gotten as he watched his best friend of teenage years succumb to madness.

||Should I play with him, or not..?||

Before Nie Huaisang had even made an actual decision, his body was already moving on its own - not much more stable on his legs yet the urge to tease made him go through with it. Grabbing one of his endless fans from his table, he walked over to Wen Ning who had just begun to raise his upper body, barely upright yet and more or less kneeling on the ground. It was almost the perfect opportunity, one of the scenes Huaisang loved to act out the most depending on the lover he had: Closing the gap between himself and the General, he leaned forward, gently putting one end of his fan underneath the others chin before Wen Ning automatically looked up.

,,I am unable to feel the temperature.. temperature of the water.. I tried to prepare it how.. how I used to, b-.. but I'm unsure if it will be to your liking, sect leader."

,,Alright.."

The sect leader replied in his drunken tone, a tad more upbeat as he turned the game that he thought was going on around with walking past the General and going straight to the tub without saying another word. Only moments later was Huaisang feeling the water, robes laying on the ground and really.. that the water had the perfect temperature yet the other had been so worried about messing up that he stumbled over his own two feet just made more questions pop up in his mind. His head was spinning slightly as he let himself sink into the tub and his mind get clouded with thoughts and questions.

There was something that came to his mind time and time again.. for a brief moment as he had been quite dangerously close with his own to the Wen remnants face.. Maybe he had imagined, or his wasted mind played a trick on him but Nie Huaisang could've sworn he saw something so close to fear in the dead eyes of the one he kept provoking - which was in truth also the only and actual reason for him backing off so easily and quickly.


	150. Wen Ning/Nie Huaisang | 5

||So he can't feel temperatures.. he can barely form any expressions.. but he still stutters at times.. he doesn't seem to believe in his temper and self-control judging from the way he warned me and tried to comfort me earlier.. his tone of voice barely changes.. yet he is fully aware of what is going on around him.. thinking about how he.. how he didn't react when his body got pierced through.. my goodness I feel like I'm going to get sick.. anyway.. it doesn't seem like he feels pain,.. but at the same time.. it doesn't appear as if he feels nothing at all either.. and he's extremely strong on top of all of that...||

Nie Huaisang went through a list in his mind about the things he had known or noticed about the other already or so far.. But most were guesses, he wasn't overly sure about anything and Wen Ning had made it hard to really say what was a fact and what wrong.

||Interesting.. so interesting.. I want to know more..||

The younger one of them was unaware of how much time had passed before he reached out to one of the towels that was always beside the tub, ending his train of thought with those last few words before he began to dry himself down and wrap the towel around himself. He hadn't even taken a new robe, or his nightgown with him.. he really was far too curious and engrossed in this little game he was playing, but for one reason or another - mostly because of his brother's fate - Nie Huaisang wanted to know more, anything he could possibly get to know.

As Huaisang stepped out of the bathroom he was somewhat surprised that the apparently rather clumsy one had managed to get back up on his two feet, just as much as about the fact that he was still there in the first place. Walking past Wen Ning, the sect leader stood before his bed, hesitating for a moment before slyly smirking to himself as he said what he did in a tone matching to his words.

,,Don't look, alright?"

The sect leader couldn't have known that apart from having seen many nude corpses so far, he was also rather obedient and a moment later he had already turned around - facing the wall that was formerly behind him, his motions slightly audible. It wasn't like Wen Ning wanted to get involved with Nie Huaisang, but right now he was unsure if leaving the other alone would be the right choice to do.. At the end of the day if someone had seen him with the sect leader and something would happen to the latter, the blame would get pushed on him.

Turning around, once he had gotten dressed in his nightgown, there was frustration welling up inside Nie Huaisang again - he had fully expected to get looked at. Sure, he had almost no knowledge about his former friends living corpses, but over the years he had an affair or two and knew that even if he didn't think overly highly of himself he was on the pretty side and most would've used the chance. The last bottle of liquor he had drank, then the warmth of the water, the smaller male had by then reached his limit when it came to making any type of proper decision and refraining from causing even more mischief or acting out - not that he really did anything proper with his life often usually, but well.

Walking up to the taller one, Nie Huaisang poked the other in the middle of his back - yet he couldn't figure out if Wen Ning turned because of that or because he had heard him coming closer. Tapping with his fan on the palm of his hand, the sect leader stared up at the one that stared down on him with that never changing and nothing saying gaze.. from all the situations in his life that really had to be the oddest one.

,,Yes..?"

,,I have dirtied your robes earlier, Master Wen.. It would only be appropriate for me to give you a robe to change in while I make sure yours is washed and dried by the time you depart."

The General was standing there in silence for a few seconds, both of them realizing rather quickly that what the younger one of them said didn't make all that much sense.

,,It doesn't matter."

,,It does. It would be inappropriate of me to let you walk around like that, after all you're a guest of my sect. Wait here, Master Wen."

Nie Huaisang hadn't even entirely walked out of the door yet as he paused, causing the Wen Remnant to almost bump into his back. Blinking, the younger male walked a few more steps, paused and again Wen Ning followed and stopped half a foot behind him. While Nie Huaisang was a lover of many things - he wasn't one to get mad or agitated in an aggressive or frustrated sense easily.. However, he also had only encountered 2 people in his life that were completely expressionless: One of them had been Jin Guangyao, the other was now Wen Ning.. Apart from those two, all the people he had been involved with more closely were each in his or her own way rather full of expression. Whether it be Mingjue's fits, Wei Ying's mischievous side, Jiang Cheng's up and down and left and ride character.. but somehow, Wen Ning irritated the hell out of him as he turned around, staring up at the taller one as he kept the distance between them with his fan pushed against the others chest.

,,Why are you following me?"

,,.."

,,Ah, I see.. You don't trust me."

,,.. I am wary.. but more aware of the risks."

,,Risks?"

,,We are both looked.. looked down upon.. it would be a good opportunity.. for someone to try to get us both out of the way.. if they harm you while I was around."

The arm Huaisang had held in the air to keep the tip of his fan pressed against the others chest dropped slowly. His big eyes widening minimally at the same time before he looked down, only now taking note of how much trouble that could cause for a lot of people. At the end, after a brief moment, he turned back around and nodded before walking into a room to the right of the main staircase that led to the upper floor of the Qinghe Nie Sect.


	151. Wen Ning/Nie Huaisang | 6

Wen Ning had followed, yet he hesitated to step into the room as a faint and flickering light began to make a few things visible. Huaisang had only left the door a crack open, but even through that the taller one of them could see how different the rooms were. It was darker in color, less personal items lying around, and the only thing the General was able to spot that caught his attention was a knife.

As after several minutes the sect leader still hadn't returned, Wen Ning opened the door enough, so he could get in. The other was standing in front of a table, a dark blueish green robe hanging over his left arm and gaze fixed on something that seemed to be far in the distance.

,,Sect leader?"

,,Mh? Oh.."

Other than Nie Huaisangs eyes that went clearer again rather quick, his tone as he came to again remained rather "far away". Regardless of that, he walked towards the other and only paused in his steps as the taller one spoke up.

,,Is that.."

,,My dear brother's room, yes.."

Wen Ning then watched the sect leader walk away, like the latter had taken a moment to reply, Wen Ning in turn took a last look around before he stepped to the table to wave out the candle with his hand. Neither of them said a word, the General had followed shortly after, having closed the door to the late Nie Mingjue's room as he now again.. stood there somewhat awkwardly in the current Nie Sect Leaders room.

,,I won't look, so take your time."

,,..."

,,These robes were one of the many gifts my brother usually received.. He neither liked that, nor would they have ever fitted either of us."

Huaisang added. He was standing in front of the General, holding the robe out in his hand - it had been easy to guess why the stranger hesitated due to the way he glanced at the robes and back. As Wen Ning still didn't take them, he shrugged, walked back to his bed to put the robes on top and walked out. Maybe the oh so feared Ghost General really was just shy and needed some privacy? The smaller one wasn't too sure, but once minutes had passed and the Wen Remnant still hadn't called for him to be able to go back into his own room - Nie Huaisang simply went back inside, only to find the tall guy struggle with trying to get dressed.

,,That won't work this way, Master Wen.."

For someone like Nie Huaisang who was rather vain or peacocky when it came to how he was dressed and how others were as well.. it was a bit of a nightmare to watch. Which at the end resulted in him walking around, so he was once more standing in front of the barely dressed Wen Ning, already standing on his tip-toes to fix the position of the robes collar. Huaisang was a bit socially-awkward, but not really the shy type, due to that he didn't take note of how.. strange the situation was, nor did he really care. Yet.. around the time when he fixed the last bits of the robe at the chest of the other he spoke up in a low tone, hands holding onto the robe as he stared at them instead of looking at Wen Ning directly who didn't understand what he meant anyway.

,,I'm sorry.."

,,... I don't understand..."

,,I behaved badly.. I let my problems out on you.. completely forgetting about that you already paid for everything a long time ago.."

Just like the sect leader had taken a long time to realize, Wen Ning only came to understand what the other was getting at as the latter put the palm of his hand against the middle of his upper body. Nie Huaisang's hands were by far too small to cover the entire area, yet the older one knew that it was around where the fierce corpse Nie Mingjue had pierced through him.

,,It's alright."

Wen Ning reassured in his unchanging tone.. yet Huaisang ended up misunderstanding the gesture of taking his hand into his own way bigger, yet rather cold one. The General didn't want the sect leader to torment himself about something that wasn't really his fault.. yet somehow, even if it was in far too many ways far too wrong, and Nie Huaisang was fully aware of that as well.. He couldn't help but stare at his hand that was getting held gently, combining with the reassuring words as he was unable to recall when someone had last been like that towards him.. The younger one's face tinted in a brighter shade of pink as his heart pounded in his chest as he then after a moment too long pulled away and walked to his bed.

,,What are you going to do now, Master Wen? Are you just intending to stay there, or..?"

Huaisang asked as he stroked over his bed, he simply needed a moment to collect himself even if he would mess up his sheets in a minute again anyway with pulling them apart to get rest. His tone however sounding rather on edge and nervous in between of his drunken state.

,,If you allow I might take the chair and stay outside, Sect leader."

,,Do you intend to sleep on a chair?"

,,I can't sleep."

,,.."

The younger one flinched, pulling a bit of his blanket rather unintentionally together as he felt pain in his chest for more than one reason. He couldn't even begin to imagine how terrible such a life must be, nor stop himself from feeling like the worst trash to ever roam around on earth for wishing that "luck" for his brother and treating the taller one of them like that the entire past 40 plus minutes.

,,I.. I see.. I didn't know.. I really didn't... If you want to sit somewhere, you can take one side of the bed.. it's far too spacious for me anyway.."

Did Huaisang blurt those words out without thinking just because he wanted to make some bits and pieces up somehow? Yes, he did. Did he regret it almost instantly? Yes, that as well.. but he couldn't backtrack now either, could he? Wouldn't that be just another shitty move to make?


	152. Wen Ning/Nie Huaisang | 7

,,There's no need-"

,,Could you stop repeating "It's alright." and so forth already? How am I supposed to sleep knowing you're sitting on a chair in the hallway where anyone might be able to see you? Apart from that, how am I supposed to talk to you when you're outside? I'm not tired and I wish to converse."

There was it, the sect leader was slowly growing annoyed again due to all the ups and down in his frustration.. causing his little mistress, or princess, side to make an appearance. He knew how to get what he wanted, even with cheap and embarrassing tricks such as playing the maiden in distress. Already while saying what he did Huaisang walked around and sat down on the bed, pulling the blanket over his lap and stared at the feared General with his barely from the age changed fine features. When a few seconds had passed and Wen Ning still didn't move, he patted on the free side of his luxurious over-sized bed.. that appeared even more huge thanks to him really not being the tallest or most trained.

,,I'm dirty.."

,,We all are, in our own ways."

Just like Nie Huaisang didn't take note of the true meaning behind the taller males words, Wen Ning didn't understand what the other was trying to say either. Several minutes passed, at that point the sect leader was about to give up as Wen Ning finally gave in - too afraid of what scene it may cause if he wouldn't do so - and sat down on the free side of the bed. Or well, he exposed his in bandages wrapped feet first, then sat with his legs stretched out on the bed, the furthest to the edge of it that he could manage without falling off. Nie Huaisang watched in silence, not that it overly satisfied him.. but he had gotten what he wanted after all, even though he questioned if the other was serious in his mind.

,,So.. I already apologized, but I will do so once more. I am sorry for acting the way I did while you were trying to help, Master Wen. And before you are going to repeat that it's alright while it's not.. How about we talk for a bit?"

,,You should sleep, today is the last day of the festivity, Sect leader Nie."

,,I am anything but tired. But.. How about you? We have never had a conversation before.."

,,I'm not well liked by most."

,,Neither am I, we got something in common already. But.. You just said you are unable to sleep.. Can you eat, or drink?"

Honestly, the Nie Sect leaders socializing skills had grown rusty a little, but being as wasted as he was.. He could talk, and each time Wen Ning tried to start one of his negative speeches, it was rather easy for the - technically - younger one of them to shove in another question or sentence in a somewhat lively like tone. Huaisang also quickly changed his position so that he was laying on his stomach, chin propped up on his hands, staring at Wen Ning who at times nodded or shook his head in between of replying in this emotionless and empty tone of voice.

,,I don't need it.. I think I might be able to, technically,.. but I'm not sure what it would do to my body.."

,,Do you miss it?"

,,I.. At times. Being unable to.. to enjoy a meal someone has made it.. it's not a good feeling.. but at the same time.. When you are the only one that can't eat.. you can take in everything that is going on around you.."

,,For example?"

,,Expressions.. Conversations.."

,,You should be able to cook for them though.."

,,... I don't know.."

Even though the taller one rarely used "I don't know" directly and mostly in different ways, slowly but surely Nie Huaisang came to understand how and why people grew so frustrated with him - especially since he turned into a sect leader without ever wanting to be one out of nowhere. It. Was. Frustrating.

,,You can't cook?"

,,A few meals, yes.. but I'm unsure if it would be.. healthy or safe for other's to eat a meal prepared from me.."

It was a bold question to ask of someone who wouldn't be able to boil water without making a mess.. the sect leader wasn't even sure if he asked what he did to see if they had another one of their strangely many similarities. At the end he needed a moment to let out a sound of realization, he didn't quite take note of the fact that the General was in fact a corpse and well.. there were risks even he knew of such as corpse poisoning.

,,You should try.. maybe with bandages around your hands like you have them on your feet.. and something simple to start with.."

,,Maybe.."

,,Not maybe, you should. On your birthday? When is your birthday?"

,,11th of april..."

,,Oh, really? Mine's on may 20th!~ You're older than me by a month, I didn't know that."

,,Am I..?"

,,What's wrong..?"

,,..."

,,You just looked at me for the first time in minutes and now you're staring at your lap without replying.."

The tone Huaisang used now for a brief moment was between a whining and a bit of a worried one. He had scooted closer to the taller one by then, his head tilted to the side and upwards more or less hovering over the others lap.

,,It's not like I'm alive.. and it matters.. I don't age.."

,,Don't talk like that.. If it wouldn't matter and if you wouldn't be alive in one way or another your face wouldn't look so sad right now would it?"

,,That's not-"

,,I'm not lying.. Your eyes, the way your hair falls into your face right now as you try to not make me look at you,.. the way you tugged onto your robe as if there is a part of you feeling something deep down inside..."

To the taller one's surprise, even if he couldn't really show it, Nie Huaisang had changed his position.. he had rolled around as Wen Ning had tried to turn his statement into a lie, resting his head onto his lap as he reached out to place a hand on the General's cheek while talking. Wen Ning wasn't able to feel the sensations from his body, he couldn't take in the warmth of the other's hand or even the weight on him.. but his soul, that was so very much alive, could feel and think and in that moment in time.. Somehow, he couldn't help but think how pretty the other was. Not necessarily the sexual kind of pretty or arousing, just like a flower that you would find yourself gazing at while feeling something you were unable to explain properly. Wen Ning simply felt with his soul that the other was beautiful. Whether it be the way he paid attention to him, how aware he was of his weaknesses and the mistakes he made that he apologized for rather quickly.. that he was so open and almost uncaring, while not being unwavering and perfect at the same time.

Wen Ning couldn't help but feel and think with his own that the other's soul was actually, truly beautiful in its existence. And at that moment in time, Wen Ning felt relieved in his soul for having someone so open for once by his side.


	153. Wen Ning/Nie Huaisang | 8

,,And if you would be honest.. Haven't we all died at least once already.. died and never moved on fully.. so are we all dead because of that and everything after doesn't matter anymore? Has our existence grown unimportant simply because a part of us stopped in time and never moved on..?"

As Nie Huaisang kept looking up at him.. even though his voice had this underlying sadness within its sound as clearly he was more than likely thinking about his own emotions caused from his brothers fate.. Wen Ning wasn't able to do a lot of things anymore, but he could hear - far more than perfectly in truth - and right now what he heard was calming, reassuring and soothing almost.. The sect leaders voice had almost the same strangely alluring, intoxicating effect on him right there and then as the melody Wei Ying used to play for him.

It was strange, and neither of the men truly knew what was going on,.. but they both felt such a comfort from meeting someone so unfamiliar, that couldn't truly judge or know much to anything about them.. and regardless, or exactly because of that, being just taken how they were. Getting to know someone who was a complete stranger, someone who had been barely tainted from the story each of them had on his own, was something neither of them had expected but both needed without even knowing they did or realizing it even now.

,,What do you like..?"

The younger ones eyes widened, he had put his hand behind his head as the other hadn't replied to what he was saying at all.. trying to think of a topic, not imagining that Wen Ning would be the one to keep their conversation going somehow.

,,What I like..? A few years ago still, my answer would've been.. books, fans, just the fine and maiden like things.. by now.. I can't fully enjoy all those things anymore, without my mind wandering.. I might have read a poem collection too much and soiled my heart with it.."

,,Because.. Because of your brother..?"

,,It wouldn't be fair of me to say that it doesn't matter after forbidding you to do so and getting upset over you using that phrase, would it..?"

,,...."

,,I guessed so.. Whatever I look at, I cannot help but think of him.. There are moments, many of them, where I do something and I think I can hear him scolding me.. yet as I turn into the direction I hear the voice coming from, there's no one there..."

,,I understand that.."

Nie Huaisang's averted gaze flickered back to the taller one of them, his expression hard to read but once more he felt like he had been able to spot a faint flicker of life and emotions, pain, in Wen Ning's lifeless eyes.

"Does it get better?", he really wanted to ask that.. but more than that he was afraid of the answer, afraid of the "No." he knew was the correct one, the only honest reply. Afraid of saying it, only to get telling silence or another wave of emotion being visible within the dead eyes of the General.. Afraid of just saying those words out loud, making himself recall again that the reality he was living with, where his brother no longer stood tall and proud and strong by his side was the only one - that the pain would always be there like when the doctor confirmed Mingjue had taken his last breath in this lifetime. Afraid of breaking down again, knowing fully well the reactions all of that, any of that, would cause would be way worse than those Wen Ning already had to witness.

,,How.."

,,You have to find something, or someone, you wish to live for.. more than you wish to die because they are gone.."

Huaisang gritted his teeth, stopping the choked sob from escaping as within the briefest of moments his eyes were so full of tears he could barely see a thing clearly. At the end he nodded, a few too many times, then he turned his head away and spoke a few moments later as he tried his hardest to not fall apart for good this time.

,,What do you like?"

,,There are a lot of things I like.. Nature.. being able to help those in need.. see someone's happy face because of the tiniest good deed.. animals.. music.. that the young disciples have a different life than we did.."

,,D-.. Do you like books?"

,,I do.. I don't have many now.. but years ago I had.. we had a lot of cultivation and medical collections.."

,,Oh.. I remember.. there were several branches of the Wen Sect.. I wasn't involved in all the war matters back then, but I think I overheard a conversation once about you originally having been associated with the medical branch.."

Even though he had felt the need to ask around a few corners whether or not the General knew about his "side business".. like before Huaisang wasn't too sure if Wen Ning was actually so pure, or just considerate, or maybe something else. Yet he also wasn't enough of a sadist to mention the others sister when the topic allowed it.. nor did he weirdly enough feel like taking the risk of asking "Hey, do you read porn, I know this really great collection"..

,,Initially.."

,,Are you good then? At medical things, I mean.."

,,... I'm.. rather clumsy.."

If it wouldn't have been too much of a mean thing to do, Nie Huaisang would've probably slapped his hand against his forehead because.. honestly after the walking fail he had witnessed not even that long ago he could've really saved himself the air that he used to ask.

,,That doesn't mean you're bad at it though."

,,Does that apply to you as well? I don't know that much about you either.. but I do know that you are widely known for never using a weapon.."

It was for a bit over a second only but the younger one threw a glare at Wen Ning. He was like most, other than Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian, unaware of how straightforward and nosy the other could be.. even mildly cunning and quite heartless depending on who you'd ask.

,,What about you?"

Throwing the question back like a burning hot potato that had been placed into his bare hands was the best and only reaction the Nie Sect leader could quickly come up with as he wished to use the time he'd make himself to figure out what on earth he was supposed to say.


	154. Wen Ning/Nie Huaisang | 9

,,When it comes to medicine.. my knowledge isn't bad, but by far not as good as my sister's has been.. And even though our branch wasn't allowed to harm others.. our existence was extremely important.. just like us remaining unharmed and alive.. so I, like most, was trained in shooting a bow or wielding a sword.."

,,Oh.. Wasn't there an uproar once at a event because of you.."

,,The bow tournament?"

,,The one where Lan Wangji quitted early and Wen Chao ran away.."

Huaisang was really the last person who should be allowed to laugh because of another persons defeat or running away.. but recalling that, even though he had mostly only heard of it, still caused him to let out a little amused chuckle.

,,I wasn't able to.."

,,Mh?"

,,.... if I was supposed to do something.. in front of other's.. I couldn't do anything successfully.."

,,Panic?"

,,..."

Wen Ning only nodded, slowly and stiffly which was the only way he could do so. It was panic, but caused from endless years of being taught to fear from others in the Wen Sects main branch.

,,Being different was something that in our good days wasn't accepted.. I had the benefit of my brother being my brother.. no one dared to lay a hand on me, or even bully me as he was alive.. but... imagining being different within the Wen Sect.."

,,Have you heard of the way young master Rulan gets treated within the Jin Sect.. or got treated?"

,,... Even though I don't wish to recall whom I heard it from.. I heard a few things.."

,,It was similar.. but worse."

There was only one thought popping up in the Nie Sect leaders had "That's terrible.". He had lived quite a few years by now knowing the ugly sides of society, how the talking could harm you in far more ways than actual physical torture.. He didn't want to imagine having that from your own sect, then later on from all the others due to sharing a last name and nowadays still at times..

,,I wasn't part of that at the time.. but please accept my apology for our ancestors and former sect leaders..."

He was about to say more, yet paused as the taller one of them shook his head as he for the first time seemed to relax far enough now to lean back against the bed.

,,We were not innocent.. We might not have killed anyone ourselves, yet we did not step up.. We did not stop what we could've and should've stopped from happening.."

,,We all were not innocent if you intend to start and continue with this train of thought.. None of us was.. And it still does not excuse what happened at the end.. If only watching without taking actions is enough to be executed and hated - None of us should be alive anymore nowadays.. None of us."

A bit of silence broke out during which the sect leader kept his gaze fixed on the other.. Wen Ning's eyes were flickering about here and there - it was hard to make out what was going on inside of him yet at the end Huaisang settled for the thought that the older male was probably trying to refrain from deepening that part of the conversation.. or trying to stop himself from excusing what couldn't be excused due to being hated and looked down upon for so long anything but that was nothing he could truly accept or see as the truth. After a while, Wen Ning then tilted his head forward, speaking while looking into the sect leaders eyes.

,,What about you? You didn't answer my question."

The breath Huaisang had just been about to suck into his lungs got paused in the middle, getting exhaled shortly after as a heavy and defeated kind of sigh. Slowly but surely he came to understand or see that even though socially awkward and mostly gentle and considerate Wen Ning had a side to himself he couldn't quite find a categorization for just yet.

,,You won't forget unless I give you an answer probably....... Thought so."

Like guessed, as the smaller male paused in his sentence to see how the other would react, Wen Ning simply stared at him in silence which was clear enough of a confirmation for his guess. Letting out another sigh, a bit of redness spread on the sect leaders cheeks while his eyes filled with a mixture of sadness and guilt, regret as well.

,,I never thought highly, or wanted to be a part, of all the things that are what most others want.. I never liked the thought of harming others, ending lives.. or playing with weapons to show off.. It just isn't appealing to me.. Why do we need to do all of that, why can't we just sit down and drink and talk..?"

All Wen Ning could really do was pull his shoulders up and let them fall down again, his shrug making the bed move and make a noise due to how heavy he actually was.

,,I just don't understand.. Everyone always acts and converses so highly about themselves and their ancestors as well as sects.. but at the end they all treat one another like the most uncivilized beings.. What a hypocrisy is that? We're not different from any type of dark source, just that we have the means to avoid doing so, yet we don't.. Aren't we worse than at the end of the day?"

,,I understand the way you are thinking.. It is as you said earlier, Sect leader.. we stopped moving in time.. but.. the youth is different.. they are on a better path.."

,,Could you stop calling me like that already? I never wished to have that title and the last place I want to hear that in as well are my private chambers. Call me anything else, Huaisang, A-Sang,.. anything."

,,That wouldn't be appropriate-"

,,What even is? Everything we live with is a lie anyway, whether it be how high our positions are.. how dear our ancestors and sects are to us.. everything can lose it's meaning within a mere second for momentary gain.."

,,Alright. Don't get upset, I didn't mean to upset you.."

Wen Ning interrupted the other as he grew louder and more agitated again, putting a hand of his on top of the younger ones chest - once again one of those stiff, unmoving calming gestures that strangely enough seemed to work as Nie Huaisang let out a heavy breath.


	155. Wen Ning/Nie Huaisang | 10

,,What were you about to say still?"

,,I.. My brother made sure not to let me know about the saber spirits.. but somehow.. from really early on in my life, I never felt comfortable around or with them. You may call it a hunch, or instinct.. I didn't wish to wield one, have one of my own.."

,,But?"

,,Alright, alright.. you won't let me live if I won't tell.. I can wield one, I can also wield a sword and shoot a bow.. by far not perfectly, but I trained when no one pushed me to do so and I had nothing better to do.. I won't use any of that however, and I do not wish for anyone else to know about that."

,,Are you feeling better now?"

,,What?"

,,It is one of your secrets that you have been hiding, yet.. it didn't feel as if you had intended to hide it for as long as you had to."

At that point Nie Huaisang's eyes widened in shock, his mouth opening and closing as he felt so.. weirdly naked and intimidated at the same time. He didn't speak up for a longer while, questioning how this complete stranger was able to look right through him as if he was some sort of picture book that you only needed to take a brief glance at to know its contents. When he did speak up then, his voice was shaky and somewhat low.

,,You're scaring me.. and that not in a violent way.. I don't know how you could know but.. it's true. I trained,.. I intended to show my brother one day.. Just so he would know that he did not waste his time on me."

,,I have lived many years.. getting to know and spotting the secrets of others.. carrying them with me without ever saying a word.. I do not have a story, or a life of my own.. maybe it's because of that that I can see through other's so easily.. Also because my mind is rarely clouded from emotions.."

,,Is it true..?"

,,What?"

,,.. The core.."

,,.. It is... but I neither wish to talk about that again.. nor do I think you're in the right condition to hear about it.."

They spend a good while taking turns in talking, here and there pausing in between as the younger ones head kept resting on the others lap.

,,What about you?"

,,I don't understand.."

,,You say you don't have a story of your own.. but that can't possibly be true.. you were born, you lived, you.. you died.."

,,I was raised by my sister.. our parents died early.. We had other family, but they died as well.. My only friend was Wei Wuxian.. I had a group of youths under me, but we never harmed anyone.."

,,You even had subordinates?"

,,I did.. but we were a group of those.. no one else wanted to have working with them.."

,,It still doesn't erase the fact that having subordinates of your own is an accomplishment. I didn't have any, I had to take over my sect without any experience when it came to leading.."

Wen Ning didn't quite know what to say to that.. He didn't feel like it was anything major, nor that he even did a good job at leading his group but.. at the same time it wasn't like he would think highly of himself even if he would've taken down the Wen Sect all on his own.

,,It surprises me however.. How many similarities we have.. My brother was older than me, only a half-brother however.. Our parents died early, yet we already didn't have any other family left.. I was quite.. the good-for-nothing like most say... the only two friends I ever had were A-Cheng and A-Xian many years ago for a short while in the Gusu Lan Sect.. Not that I studied a lot.."

,,Why?"

,,Well... I thought that as long as I would play the idiot I could avoid being put in uncomfortable positions.."

,,I see.. It might not be my place to say so.. But I think that is wrong.."

,,I'm not in the mindset to be scolded for neglecting my studies-"

,,That was not my intention.. It's just that.. How do you want to change the way things are.. if you always avoid the uncomfortable path you have to walk on for it to happen?.. I don't know.. but I think that.. after talking to the youths.. someone has to make the first step into the right direction.. even if it may not be as comfortable or easy.."

,,Making the impossible possible? You've really spent a long time with A-Xian, it's easy to notice.."

It was only for a really short moment, almost too low to be heard from someone with as low of a spiritual energy level such as Nie Huaisang's.. but his eyes widened as he reached up to pull Wen Ning's head somewhat roughly down and closer to his own face.

,,Was that right now.. Did you laugh?"

,,.. No.."

,,Okay.. maybe not a real laugh but something like a chuckle or a huff or.. I didn't know you are able to do that.."

,,.... I didn't either.."

Wen Ning admitted, if he would be able to he would've more than likely went quite red in the face.. like that however all he could do was pull his head back and stroke rather shyly and awkwardly with the tip of his index finger over his cheek.

,,Well.. You do need to take in air to produce a audible voice.. even if you might not physically need air to live.. But why did you laugh? You said you don't feel anything.."

There was no instant reply coming from the General as he tilted his head to the sided, avoiding eye contact while rubbing with his hand over the side towards the back of his neck. Clearly showing his insecure shy like side because even though he was dead he still knew when someone should feel embarrassed and so forth and when it came to emotions most did - especially when it went to "feeling something with ones soul".. like.. Even Wen Ning himself couldn't help but think how weird that sounded.


	156. Wen Ning/Nie Huaisang | 11

,,I.. I do feel.. but differently.. Deeper.. yet more like a realization.. or recalling of how I should or would've felt if I would be alive.. I.. My soul is alive.. my body isn't.."

Pursing his lips Nie Huaisang needed a few moments to make his drunken mind understand, just like Wen Ning had taken a while to say what he did without truly saying what he meant.

,,Your soul is alive.. but your body isn't... so.. it's like one of those feelings that you can neither locate nor explain? Similar to an instinct, but not like a feeling caused from a touch or something like that?"

Thinking for a bit, Wen Ning hesitantly and stiffly nodded before taking a bit more time to try and explain.

,,It's similar to when a person dear to you.. is in distress.. it is not your sickness, or wound, or stress, but you feel something within you.. It's something like that... I think.."

,,That's interesting.. really interesting.."

Huaisang felt and acted like a child, he had lifted his hands up, letting them hover over his face as if he tried to make sense of something. His eyes were wide open, a glimmer in them that further proved both his state of awe and excitement as well as how intrigued he was.

,,So you feel everything but the physical reactions and things that would hold you back.. only the physical sensations are missing, not those in your mind.."

Just like before, the taller one of them thought for a moment and nodded again. Right now for example.. even though he didn't have the physical sensations of embarrassment taking him over such as heat from his face caused by a blush, or sweaty palms and shaky hands.. he did feel embarrassed, just on a far deeper level.

,,Only the strongest emotions that a person is able to feel.. those might cause me to react.. extreme unfairness,.. ungratefulness,.. mental pain.. anger.."

,,Because they are technically what keeps you alive.."

Wen Ning understood shortly after that the other knew this detail because Nie Mingjue was in a similar, just far more terrible position.. And if he could've, the taller one would've let out a heavy breath. However, his averted gaze flickered back and got fixed on the sect leader once again as the latter spoke up in a more hesitant tone - quite the difference to the rather easy-going, drunken one he had used in the past couple of minutes in between of an annoyed or agitated one here and there.

,,Just.. Just out of curiosity.. And I know it might be a terrible thing to ask.. If you would actually have the chance to live again.. or if things would've run differently.. What kind of a life do you.. or did you want..?"

The taller one of them paused in the movement that he had made to brush a few strands of his hair back. He usually still wore it open, secretly afraid of ripping it out since he knew that it wouldn't grow back. At the end he left his hair how it was and put his hand back down on the sheets beside him as he stared at a spot at a wall.

,,I would've liked to.. prove myself.. leave my sect, maybe.. help those in need.. I regret not having tried harder to succeed in the medical field... I would've built a house... and gotten a pet,..-"

,,A pet?"

Nie Huaisang sounded just as confused as interested. He had expected a different way for the sentence ending than a pet.. Which only strengthened his belief that even though they were so similar while he was a sinner the other was a complete saint. As Wen Ning nodded, the sect leader in turn blinked.. taking a second before he had himself back together enough to throw a distracting question out there.

,,What kind?"

,,.. I would like to have a cat.."

,,Why didn't you hold one before, or why aren't you getting one now?"

,,Before we were moving too often... And now.. I'm still building my house.. apart from that..."

,,Are you.. possibly afraid that you might hurt it?"

For someone who had scared the crap out of teenagers with cat corpses that was really.. quite the question to ask, yet he wouldn't bring up what he had done and Wen Ning simply nodded which had to mean he either didn't care or hadn't connected the dots after all.. right?

,,Did you ever hurt anyone just so? While you were in your right mind?"

,,No.. but a cat is far more.. fragile.. apart from that.. I'm cold.."

,,Are you afraid that it won't feel comfortable snuggling up to you or sleeping on top of you?"

Another hesitant nod was all Huaisang got as a reply. Honestly, just the thought of his possible pet constantly trying to make a distance between itself and him.. it was devastating to think about. The sect leader however rolled his eyes, the other couldn't possibly know unless he tried, could he?

,,Complete nonsense! Look, I've been resting my head on your lap since how long now? An hour, maybe even longer. Am I feeling cold? No. And believe me there aren't many things I'm good at but whining and complaining are two of those things. Apart from that, I'm small and really REALLY fragile,.. everyone knows that, right? Have you hurt me? No."

,,That.. I..."

,,Okay, wait. Don't even try to say anything that includes a "but". Mmh.. Let's see.. Oh, I have an idea!~"

A drunk Nie Huaisang that hadn't acted playfully in far over a decade really wasn't the most intelligent option to try and argue with - it only led him to have ideas.. mischievous like ones.

Sitting up the younger one moved a bit further to the side, his movements fidgety as if he was somewhat excited as he pointed with his finger onto the bed while saying in probably the most commanding tone he had ever used.

,,Lay down."

,,.... Why..?"

,,Lay. Down. Stop arguing. You don't believe me so.. If I manage to fall asleep snuggled up to you like a cat, and if I have a good night's rest then you will have to get a cat. If you don't get yourself one, I will get you one. I know a lot of sellers and I don't accept a no. Of course, get one once your house is build. Notify me when it's done."


	157. Wen Ning/Nie Huaisang | 12

The longer Wen Ning hesitated, the more piercing the other's gaze got. As easily as someone might be able to scare the taller one of them, somehow.. Nie Huaisang looked a bit like an upset squirrel with a nut stuffed in its cheeks due to the air he ended up blowing and holding in them. After spending some time debating and resisting, the General then did give in as he got up from the bed, sat down at a lower part of it and laid down so his head was resting on the pillow. Other than Nie Huaisang who looked like he was so proud of himself for this achievement.. Wen Ning felt like it was wrong, and it would probably all not end well - especially if someone would get to know about it.

Within a few mere seconds Nie Huaisang threw the blanket over them as he like promised snuggled up to the other. One arm resting in the middle of the others chest, head beside it, even a leg somehow ended up slung around one of Wen Ning. Letting out a heavy breath, Huaisang looked up for a short moment as he wiggled his foot, his tone quickly becoming more drowsy and calm once he rested his head back on the taller males chest.

,,You are really quite tall.."

,,I was one of the smallest, actually.. from our generation.."

,,But you were quite handsome.. I remember seeing you once, I think.. You weren't like the others, but your face and your eyes.. you were an actual beauty..."

,,Se-.. A-Sang..?"

,,Mh?"

,,You were the one who brought master Wei back,.. right?"

Wen Ning took note of the fact that the younger one of them tensed briefly, his breathing stopped before he eventually relaxed and spoke up. The exhaustion was slowly taking Nie Huaisang over, and with the mental struggles he had gone through he simply ended up talking without taking it in really - or even thinking.

,,I only was a part of that.. Mo Xuanyu made the final decision.."

,,It is just a guess... but could it be that you weren't the one that approached him and instead.."

,,You pick up on a lot of things.. I like that.."

The strangely satisfied and sly smile that was playing on the sect leaders lips was audible in his low tone of voice as he replied without making things overly clear at the same time after a short pause.

,,I have a lot of time to think.. that's all... but what I'm unsure about... Was it only for a selfish reason.. that you brought Master Wei back?"

,,What are you trying to say? I don't know, I don't-"

,,We both know that this type of act won't work around me."

,,You are.. surprisingly troublesome and pushy.. A-Ning.~"

Wen Ning's tone wasn't able to change a lot, nor did he get loud at that moment in time.. but Nie Huaisang had picked up on something by then. Whenever the taller male grew somewhat agitated, annoyed, or even mad, he would speak without a pause, without much of a struggle. It was weirdly thrilling, in all honesty, how they both had those.. hidden side's to themselves that were so dangerously complementary.

,,I like that.. I really do.. so due to that I will tell you a bit more.~ As I told you earlier, A-Cheng, A-Xian and I were friends.. Already before losing my brother I lost those two friends.. both of them to madness, one of them literally not long after.. Then I lost my brother to madness as well.. I always kept watching A-Cheng.. I knew he would meet the same fate as my dear brother if he would continue walking the path he was walking on.. I knew from being with them for 3 months and A-Cheng for a year that A-Cheng is an actor, one with such a sensitive and fragile soul... As if send from the god's, a little bird landed in my hands, searching for a solution to his problems.. One bird had to give up his life, so several more could fly again, and the bird in my hands was willing to give up it's wings.... There is more to everything than what meets the eye, A-Ning.~"

,,You like this.. Sect leader Jiang?"

,,Oh? I could swear I just heard rage and bitterness in your voice for a moment just now, A-Ning..~ I simply don't like when someone dares to lay a hand on what or whom I hold dear.. Especially when the one's that dare lay a hand on them or it are the ones in the wrong.. That's only fair, right? I don't fancy A-Cheng in such a way, but what about you, A-Ning? What is your true relation to A-Xian?~"

,,Master Wei was the only one to believe in me, encourage me.. other than my sister.. I watched each of his breakdowns and bad moments almost.. We have.. never truly been friends... Even I am unable to say what we even share, what kind of bond.."

,, Accompanying someone through pain, causing it and having it caused by them.. it sounds almost like one of the tragic love stories with no happy end..."

,,Neither of us ever wished for things to be the way they are between young master Lan and Master Wei."

,,Is that so?"

,,Yes. But that doesn't explain why you are willing to be seen as a person that would do anything for nothing but revenge while you were trying to help."

For the first time in a long time Nie Huaisang chuckled, the conversation had really turned out to be quite interesting and informative. Lifting his head, he stared into the older ones lifeless eyes, a boyish grin on his face.. yet somehow.. he was like a fox, adorable yet cheeky, one could never truly know what was real and what not.

,,It's because I don't want anyone to know!~ If they would all know, think about all the things I would need to do and explain.. I always really just wished for an easy-going and simple life with nothing but nice things.."

Once again, if Wen Ning would've been able to sigh - he would've done so right now. After that they both remained silent, Huaisang had rested his head back onto the others chest, eyes closed - slowly but surely dozing off. Only when the younger one's breathing was giving away that he was about to fall asleep did Wen Ning ask what he had in mind since a while.. He wanted to have an honest reply, no acting or anything like that involved.

,,A-Sang..?"

,,Mh?"

,,If you could have your brother back.. in one way or another.. would you want that?"

,,I don't.. understand.."

,,If you could have him back.. would you risk him living a life like mine, where's he's neither dead or alive.. maybe not even happy.."

,,Yes.."

,,How much would you do for that?"

,,I would do.. anything.. for it... Do anything he wants.. me to.. so he would be.. happy.. By my side.."

~💙~

,,You really are.. anything but a bad person.. you are so similar to him.. but so different.. You could do a lot of things if you would only stop fearing to take responsibility.."

Wen Ning tried his best to keep his voice a low as possible. The younger one was asleep for a while by then.. and only now did the other dare to hesitantly lift his hand to stroke with the back of his fingers over Huaisang's from the alcohol and crying still slightly red cheek.

The one that was unable to truly rest spend his night thinking.. His mind wandering all sorts of places..

What was it that he felt for Wei Wuxian? What even were they?

He could recall that he had wanted attention, the praise.. it gave him something.. but thinking about Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian together, having witnessed them do a thing too much,.. Wen Ning could say that he had never wished for such a relationship between them.. Yet at the same time.. the thought of bad things happening to Wei Wuxian was always a matter that got his blood to boil, but what did that mean at the end of the day?

They never even had a proper conversation,.. Within the short amount of time he and Nie Huaisang had talked the latter already knew more about him than Wei Wuxian.. No matter how much he thought about it, Wen Ning couldn't find an answer, he had never found one to those questions even when he was alive still.

One of the last thoughts he had as the sun began to rise already was what Wei Wuxian had asked him once, quite a while back by then.

,,What are you planning to do with your life now? You are free after all."

And honestly.. as Wen Ning looked down at the small and thin Nie Huaisang who was just nuzzling against him without a care in the world in his slumber.. He couldn't suppress the reply in his head, that if.. Just if he wouldn't be who he was now, that just if things would be slightly different.. He'd really have nothing against being a support for Nie Huaisang. Maybe like how it was between Wei Ying and himself, just.. not with causing one another as much harm as they did, more the opposite. Wen Ning didn't wish to be alone, but he was a sensible one that found the most displeasure in someone else being alone.. Especially someone like Nie Huaisang who had no one left, who could do great things, bring good changes to their world.. if he would just have someone by his side.

But really.. that wasn't possible now, was it? Of course, it wasn't.

He had died many years ago. Dead people were supposed to be with their kind. - Nie Huaisang was alive, everyone else was… And alive people couldn't possibly find happiness being close to the deceased.


	158. XiCheng | 81

,,Did you plan that the entire time?"

Lan Xichen let out a sigh. He hadn't even yet managed to turn back around from the door after letting the last person out of his room as Jiang Cheng already spoke up. The younger ones tone was trembling badly, making it audible how hard he tried to refrain from yelling as his nephew was more than likely still close enough to hear him if he would do so.

The Jade didn't even reply at first, guessing that the other would have more to say still anyway or that he would only make things worse no matter what he would say. Turning from the door, Xichen walked to the other side of the room, grabbing two cups and a bottle of liquor - if his uncle would know how often he had drank and how he had behaved the past couple of days.. Qiren's heart wouldn't hold out for sure. To his surprise, however, Jiang Cheng only sat there, his furious gaze fixed on him no matter the movement he made or the direction he walked into.

,,I refrained from mentioning this detail before because I knew how you would react, Sect leader Jiang."

The younger one let out a sound of disgust at that, shaking his head. At the end, as he ran his hand over his face, Jiang Cheng wasn't even sure anymore if his blood was boiling the way it did because of the "guest teacher" crap or because whenever the other felt like it he would be either "Sect leader Jiang" with a thick wall between them to make distance - or a second later the toy again that got kissed in the middle of the Nie Sects dining hall. Either way, it upset him enough to end up playing with Zidian who emitted the tiniest of purple sparks.

Even though Jiang Cheng didn't take note of it, the Jade was throwing hidden glances at him the entire time. It wasn't even that he had intended to make the other more upset, but the Lan's were always strict with there routines - and having to go back and forth between honorifics, titles and using neither led to the slip of his tongue. Xichen then spoke up again as he put the cup of liquor in front of the already tipsy Jiang Sect leader, his tone mature yet more a try to be calming - it was hard to refrain from pulling out Liebing right there and then to play a tune to make the other calm down.. but since the incident with Mingjue and GuangYao.. he still struggled, especially with that melody. Jiang Cheng however didn't even look at him, the way his the muscles of his jaw grew visible making it clear he was either pressing or grinding them together.

,,Can we talk about this calmly, A-Cheng?"

,,You really think you can do whatever you like, whenever you like it, don't you? When you want to use me, in one way or another, I'm A-Cheng and Wanyin, when you don't I'm Sect Leader Jiang. Another one of your usual routines, huh? Whatever you need to do to get what you want is alright, isn't it?"

The older one of them remained silent at that. He knew perfectly fine that Jiang Cheng wouldn't listen to him either way, he could only dig his grave further no matter which way he would go in. That didn't mean though that the others words didn't affect him, the hold around his liquor cup tightened as he began to feel this rather foreign rush build up inside him again.

Of course, the younger male didn't notice, he had only briefly half glanced - half glared at the Lan Sect Leader before looking away again. Letting out another one of those disgusted and bitter "Tsk" like noises Jiang Cheng got up and walked to a window not far away from him, without ever touching the liquor the Jade had prepared for him as if he was too disgusted to even drink what Xichen had touched.

,,If I would've told you when we were alone then you wouldn't have thought about it the way you did due to me asking with everyone gathered together."

,,Oh yeh? Who says that? Who do you even think you are? Taking yourself the right to put me as a Sect Leader several times in a position where I look like a damn fool because you make decision on your own that involve both of our prior agreement - that never happened. And based on what? Your judgement?! Because that has never failed you before, Huan."

Regardless of the sarcasm and bitterness never fading from the younger leaders tone, he regretted having said the last bit as soon as it was out - yet like usually his mouth worked faster, not willing to listen to his brain at all as he let out a chuckle that matched his tone of voice.

It was around this time as well that Jiang Cheng heard the other move, almost instantly. The steps Xichen took to close the gap between them fast, not the calm kind whatsoever and at this rate even the younger one knew he probably deserved the beating he was about to get - deserved to get since a few decades in all honesty.

,,A-Cheng!"

,,Don't even start with A-Cheng again-"

Ignoring the warning tone in which Xichen addressed him, the smaller ones body moved on his own as he stepped to the side - one of his hands lifted in a "Don't" like manner. It was surprising even to Jiang Cheng that with his luck he hadn't accidentally slapped the other somehow.. But now, the reason why he kept provoking the Jade was simply because.. he thought he had gone too far, that he had messed up beyond a possibility to go back - like he had done so many times in his life already. And that supposed knowledge hurt, to the point where all Jiang Cheng wanted was a proper end with a fist slammed in his face.

Instead, however, Jiang Cheng's new try to push Xichen over the edge was cut short. The latter had in fact grabbed him and pushed him with his back against the wall beside the window with the hold on both of his wrists being by far tighter and rougher than any way the Jade had physical contact with him before. Apart from one of the Jiang Sect leaders arms being pinned above his head, the other was pinned down by his side, the grip growing even tighter as Xichen slammed his lips against the others.

The kiss managed to convey perfectly how the taller one of them felt, even to someone who wasn't used to those physical matters much yet. In comparison to the gentle, almost loving way Xichen treated the other so far.. the way he almost forced Jiang Cheng to give in, how rough and dominating he acted now, how deep he went with his tongue, his over all body language.. The younger leader was perfectly able to understand that the man right in front of him was stumbling around on really thin ice, trapped between wanting to actually hurt him and never wanting to do so - mad and hurt, barely hanging onto his consciousness and self-control.


	159. XiCheng | 82

,,Fuck.. The hell-"

The younger ones try to continue raging was cut short as once Xichen had broken the kiss and the other tried to do so.. the Lan Sect Leader put a hand over his mouth, causing Jiang Cheng to curse inaudible and impossible to understand nothings into the palm of the one that had leaned his forehead against his hand that was still painfully tightly holding onto the smaller males wrist.

,,A-Cheng.. I'm just going to say this once, even though I hoped I wouldn't ever be put in a position where I would need to explain; especially not after yesterday's incident.. My temper, my mental condition, my self-control.. they are all not what they were once.. The reason why I stayed in seclusion for so long, why I still haven't finished that entirely.. is because I'm still recovering.."

As the words of the Jade sank in, his tone so agitated and full of pain as well as conflict, Jiang Cheng then stopped fighting back. Only then did Xichen let go of him, entirely in fact, followed from him turning away and taking a few steps to the side to look out of the window - clearly unable to, or unwilling to meet the younger ones gaze. It was too dark outside at this point to see a lot, yet it wasn't like Xichen was even looking at what was going on out there as he held one of his wrists tightly with his other hand. The Jiang Sect leader didn't speak up, yet he did turn slightly so he could look at the Jade, his own expression still upset and accompanied by a raised brow - after all those years that had turned more into his natural, or default, expression.

,,I'm unstable, not able to lead my sect. I can barely be presented as a representative in my condition, I'm aware of that.. just as much as I am not proud of it."

Even though Jiang Cheng was unsure if his guess was correct, it upset him to the point where he gritted his teeth to hear that - guessing that it must be words Xichen has heard from either the Seniors of the Lan Sect or maybe even his own uncle.

,,What kind of bullshit...? What am I then? Should I be erased from this earth?"

,,A-Cheng."

The taller one of them spoke up again in this almost warning like tone, the others had been bitter and mocking in sound - not directed at Xichen, who understood it that way though.

,,I think it would be best if you leave."

,,As if I'm going to leave now."

,,Wanyin."

,,Why should I leave? You invited me, take responsibility and stop running away."

,,A-Cheng, leave."

,,Make me. Or give me a reason at least."

Jiang Cheng could be a lot of things, acting stubborn was one of those and that's what he was doing right now as he crossed his arms over his chest - taking in his usual position with head tilted slightly to the side and back, trying to appear taller and more threatening; ignoring that he was probably in the process of digging his own grave. - Xichen at first did nothing more than to let out a sigh, staring at his hands that were mildly shaking as for a brief moment his expression distorted in painful conflict.

,,How about.. I'm completely aware of the fact that you have always.. looked up to me, respected me, more than anyone else. I'm aware of that. I have noticed that no matter who was around the person you used to apologize to first, speak to first, or act the most calmly around was me. I'm aware of the fact that you look at me and then you look at yourself and you wish you could be more like me while at the same time.. you're having this inner conflict where you strongly dislike all of that as well, probably even me and then again yourself as you think about that recalling both of our social standing and that it is nothing but immature thinking."

The younger ones expression remained the same, only a flicker in his almond colored eyes gave away that he was both startled and pushed into a corner he hadn't expected to end up in. Xichen hadn't turned entirely, only his head enough so he could look at the other - but somehow.. the vibe around him, the smile playing on his lips and the hint in his eyes was dark.. Almost as if there was a side to him that enjoyed being a little sadistic, almost as if their roles had reversed.. or as if their characters had never been all that different, just that Xichen had a better balance and self-control. Regardless of them both knowing that the Jade had gotten what he wanted, that his words had already started to effect the other, Jiang Cheng still kept up the act - knowing that they both knew better.

,,For argument's sake, let's say that any of the things you say is true - why should I remove my ass from your room?"

,,Oh, my dear A-Cheng, it's not for argument's sake - is it? I'm not as oblivious and dumb as most may think nowadays.. I'm ignorant, if I wouldn't be would I be able to do what I have to in my life when I believe in no good on this earth anymore?"

Jiang Cheng narrowed his eyes, subconsciously admitting further how right the other was. Chuckling, Xichen turned now, but didn't close the distance between them just yet.

,,Since that with A-Y.. Jin GuangYao happened,.. I've lost both trust and respect of many people, at least in many regards.. I'm getting looked down upon, even if no one dares to say so apart from my elders, I'm aware of that as well.. And as far as I'm aware, you know perfectly fine yourself how that can make you feel, isn't that correct?"

The Jade watched how the younger leaders throat bopped,.. He knew perfectly how the other was feeling just now. This lump in his throat as if someone was gradually trying to joke him as Jiang Cheng naturally recalled how he felt all those years during which he felt like his parents were doing exactly that and more and more as well. It was the truth, Jiang Cheng could feel his chest tighten, breathing growing hard as his heart ached and started to beat harder and faster in his chest.

As someone who had almost accidentally drowned once Jiang Cheng knew that it was the same sensation, just millions of times slower and far more painful.


	160. XiCheng | 83

,,Now imagine being in my position and a person that has always looked up to you, secretly wished for your guidance.. yells at and looks down on you, just like all those you grew up with. While everyone openly looks down and finds their amusement in bullying A-Sang, I'm aware that not a small amount of all sects following do so towards me in secret. Now after almost 2 years I come back and you.. and all I'm able to do is get you to look down on me as well, and honestly.."

Even though Jiang Cheng wanted to do nothing more than turn, or at least look away.. as Xichen now walked up to him, preparing to say something still.. The younger one of them couldn't, he couldn't get himself to look away or stop eyeing the other the way he always eyed people. The worst part about it all was that Jiang Cheng knew perfectly fine how that is, yet it was clear that at that moment in time the Jade was unable to recall the falling out between Jin Ling and his uncle a few days back. As threatening as Xichen appeared at first glance however, in his darker colored eyes there was a barely hidden sea of pain and loneliness visible - the same the Jiang Sect Leader had deep down hidden in his soul; which only hurt more.

,,Before I never truly understood you, A-Cheng.. I accepted how you were, knew you had your reasons, but now.. Now I understand this rage that you're carrying, unable to take control over it. I don't act on it, I keep hiding this side of myself that causes me to be barely able to recognise myself more often than not.."

,,Are you going to get to the point still, or not?"

Provoking the Jade further was probably not the best idea, but Jiang Cheng really didn't favour the feeling of being stripped mentally. Especially not because he had understood a few parts of the taller males speech back that whatever Xichen would go on to say, even though it were more or less nothing but assumptions it would all be correct and hitting deep; painfully deep at that. For once Xichen narrowed his gaze at him, their bodies were barely a foot length apart and whether the Jiang Sect Leader wanted to admit it or not their differences were still so clear. Wei Wuxian's core couldn't make up for them, especially when it came to pure physical differences and in truth.. Jiang Cheng had mostly turned into a mid-range to long distance fighter since wielding Zidian; also because he secretly feared for a wound on his body that would require medical attention that in turn could reveal his secret that already too many knew off at this point.

,,I will, even though you won't like what I'm going to say. With everything you've been saying today and the day before, you're already starting to look down on me as well. Now, I can't say for sure, but do you know this strange urge to take a step too far when you are already aware that something will not end well?"

,,If I wouldn't know it better I would say that you're the one who's head got hit and the one that drank a bit too much, Huan. You're talking in such a weird way and at the end nothing you say makes any sense."

Jiang Cheng said in a mildly annoyed tone after rolling his eyes - The only reaction that he got from the older one was a chuckle, which also didn't sound much like the old Lan Xichen. Before the tsundere understood what was happening the Jade had already closed the gap between them, leaning down so he could talk into the Jiang Sect Leaders ear in a tone barely above a whisper.

,,I want to punish you for the way you've been acting towards me.. There's a part of me that thinks that if you're already going to see me in a bad way, then I should at least give you a proper reason to do so. I want to punish you, but at the same time.. isn't it that I want to punish myself? Or that I would be punishing myself with it if I do so?"

,,Punishing? You want to drag me down and use your sects old whip lash punishment?"

The younger one responded, his tone full of mockery. Xichen however only shook his head and what he went on to say next only caused Jiang Cheng to chuckle darkly himself. In fact though, they both felt something and that something was a weirdly thrilling rush and heat in between of subconscious fear of being exposed and that honest about things they didn't want to be honest about.

,,What I mean is less.. revealable to the outside world. Already yesterday I wished to hold you down, or embrace you against the door which I know you don't wish to happen. If you have the freedom to look down on me and provoke or even hurt me, do I always just have to take it? Will I always have to go on and accept whatever someone else does to me, nod and speak words of forgiveness or thankfulness even because I am who I am? It's challenging to fight against, it only grows more unbearable while at the same time I know I should neither think nor behave this way.."

,,So.. All this talk for the fact that you want a bit of rough sex? Huan, I didn't imagine you to be so rude. Who do you think I am? Do you think I will crumble and fall so easily?"

There was this shy like twitch of a smile appearing on the Jades face as he watched how to his surprise the other took a step or two back. Jiang Cheng's expression was the usual as he went about opening the upper part of his robes without failing for even a second to stare so provocatively and arrogantly in Xichen's eyes. Once the robes were undone the younger leader pulled them off, throwing them in almost a rough motion to the side - god knew where they even landed.

,,Now what? Are you just going to let me catch a cold, Huan? Bring it on. Let's see what your arrogant ass can do since you're so confident in shattering me."

They both chuckled again - each for a different reason. While Xichen's was more the speechless kind, the others was just another sign of provocation and his own - well known, rather evident - arrogance and bite.

Honestly at that point neither of them knew what the hell they were thinking - not that they were thinking at all. It was a bit of a dangerous game they were playing, like all they had done so far, with a rather uncertain end that could lead anywhere and nowhere. For Jiang Cheng, even though he was easily provoked into madness, there was a part to him that wished for the punishment out of his own reasons. He had long since known he deserved it, even waited for it. Xichen however.. he was just a mess. He had lost himself, walking around in the abyss of his shattered trust and hopes and dreams - trying to find himself, even get to know who he truly was. The Jade.. The Jiang Sect Leader.. they were both on a journey of discovering and accepting themselves.. What a strange turn of fate that they ended up colliding now, walking this strangely crooked, narrow and dangerous path together. With quite literally no idea where it would lead to, if it would even lead them anywhere - If they'd even talk about or act on it ever again once their trip to the Qinghe Nie Sect was over.


	161. XiCheng | 84

After a brief moment where he hesitated Xichen slowly closed the gap between himself and the other. Or at least he tried, because Jiang Cheng avoided him, turning away, taking a few steps back - not so unintentionally trapping himself once again between the Jade and a wall. It was all part of the game they were playing, the one that wanted to get punished riling the other up with escaping from it for a little while.

The little while was short however as they stared into one another's eyes for a moment as the taller ones right hand already reached out to lift up the others chin. Leaning in, Xichen ached to kiss the Jiang Sect Leaderes lips.. yet as he noticed it was the same for Jiang Cheng, he smirked and went for his neck instead. The nibbles going from gentle to harder, a teasing lick followed from a peck and a suck to the delicate skin here and there.

It was just another sign of his inexperience, Jiang Cheng had honestly believed that he had the control still.. Or at least he did so, but not for long. His body was accustomed already to the wild god, each movement the latter made causing him to react as his body naturally recalled all the ways the other could and would and had so many times already made him feel. It wasn't any different now as the smallest hints of teasing caused his lower half to ache for a more direct touch.. Which Xichen didn't give him, yet the gentle kneading and rubbing over his pants and growing problem were enough to make the Jiang Sect Leaders knees go weak and mind go blank.

At the end Xichen punished them both. He wasn't giving his lover what he wanted, yet - ultimately - that also counted for himself as well. The Jade kept it all going like that, leaving more and less faint marks on Jiang Cheng's rather fair colored neck and shoulder area until he got what he wanted.. Wetness soon sickered through the thin cloth of his lovers pants, his breathing growing restless and not long after the Lan Sect Leader had started to go back and forth between barely any touch and a rather rough one his goal was reached.

,,Are you going to touch me properly today still or not? Stop being all talk and no actions."

As hard as the tsundere tried to sound threatening, regardless of it not being directly said out loud - he sounded desperate, his tone so full of frustration and need. Not that the taller one of them had ever feared the other either way, Jiang Cheng had always been.. quite adorable to him, strangely enough.

,,You are already enjoying yourself so much though, A-Cheng."

,,Bullshit.."

The younger one couldn't help but snap back a little something at least, his seniors tone had been such a tease while it sounded so serious at the same time. All he got for that though was a chuckle from the Jade, followed from more.. Pointless teasing, or at least Jiang Cheng would've loved to say so but embarrasingly enough if things would keep going that way the actions of his lover would be anything but that.

,,I teased you so much already today, I will do my best to make up for that.."

,,Then do it already!"

Xichen questioned if things would've turned out for the better or worst if he would've grown up accepting or embracing that side of himself.. The side that enjoyed leading the other on, not being played for once but the one to take mild advantage of someone else instead. He had a hard time holding back a chuckle here and there as the younger one kept trying hard to rage as shudders ran through him, the mess from his pants growing worse - glancing up at Jiang Cheng it was even more amusing to see how red the tsundere's face was, how he gritted his teeth and avoided eye contact all all costs just to hide what he couldn't.. which was that he was more than into it and feeling it all.

Only a few minutes passed before the Lan Sect Leader felt the other get a hold of a piece of his upper robe, smiling a little to himself at that. Straightening his back, Xichen then gave in as he reached into his lovers drenched pants, wrapping his hand around the younger ones length as he gave him a few more strokes before.. Jiang Cheng then hid his face against his chest as he tensed from head to toe, shuddering when the waves of his release finally took him over. This time the Jade really had to bite back a amused laugh, the smaller male had really - and he didn't even know how - managed to neither let out a single moan or curse once.. How much wrong pride could a single person legally, naturally even have?

,,Are you feeling better now, A-Cheng?~"

,,You freaking.. Are you serious? No, for sure not."

The tone in which the Jade spoke up was so dangerously sweet, only causing the in his pride hurt Jiang Sect Leader to snap. Not that he was steady enough on his feet already to not need to support of the taller one.. that he got once his release was over in form of the in his own cum drenched hand getting placed on his lower back.

,,You shouldn't get so upset, A-Cheng."

,,What the..?! How and why, can you tell me that, Huan?"

,,Because I won't let you get a single minute of rest tonight, Wanyin."

Jiang Cheng was so lost in his element called raging that he didn't care about staring up at the other with his own face all tinted in pink and eyes clouded from the pleasure he just received. Xichen in turn stared into the almond orbs, watching them widen in surprise as how flustered he was showed so clearly on the tsunderes face.. Who could blame the younger one though? The Lan Sect Leaders tone had been so serious, his statement so straightfoward and delivered with no shame in sight whatesoever.

,,Fucking idiot."

Was all the smaller male managed to press out after a few seconds as he pushed his lover away enough to manage to get himself out from the trap at least for a bit.. Without much success though, because Xichen closed the gap between them pretty much instantly again, wrapping his arms around Jiang Cheng from behind - his own problem now pressing against the other.

,,You agreed."

,,I. Am. Aware. Of. That. Stop being so persistent. What's it even that you wanna do right now?"

,,You, quite frankly."

Xichen replied, again in all seriousness and weirdly innocently.. As much as it irritated the Jiang Sect Leader, he was quite glad about the fact that his senior couldn't see how he had to bite down on his lower lip to suppress a pleasured noise. The Jade was teasing around on his neck again, rubbing against him at the same time while his hands were all over the younger ones upper body.

,,What's with your way of talking all of a sudden?"

,,.. I simply feel like we both lack a person but also ourselves when it comes to straightforwardness.. That's why.. I want you, A-Cheng."

,,Fine, fine! We already had that topic.. Now stop it.."

,,Wanyin?"

,,What now?!"

,,Did you really find it pleasurable.. and do you actually want that right now?"

Jiang Cheng couldn't quite figure out what was going on, he felt so embarrassed and could only convert that into mild shouting and raging while the Lan Sect Leader kept talking in a calm tone - not hiding his fragility much or at all. However, the tsundere couldn't say it.. He couldn't give Lan Xichen the reply he wanted and deserved which ultimately made the taller one of them pull away and retreat not long after.


	162. XiCheng | 85

It didn’t take long before they both realised what the hidden question Xichen had truly was.. But for that it did shock and confuse them both. The Jade wasn’t even sure why he asked, nor what he expected to hear.. Even less if he was already ready for such a conversation himself or not after the nightmare with his two sworn brothers.

Jiang Cheng in turn.. There were a lot of things running through his head, not for the first time either. In truth, he had spend quite a while already thinking about what the hell the point of what they were doing was whenever he was alone and not caught in a hard, far too distracting state. Was it something? Was it nothing? Were they simply caught up in the moment and once they’d go separate ways again it would all be as if nothing ever happened? Wasn’t that quite possible actually?

And first of all.. Was that even the right time to talk or think about all of that? He was at least tipsy, they had just more or less fought, both in positions that didn’t allow rushed decisions based on a whim.

Xichen was just about to tell the other to forget about it as Jiang Cheng began to move. For a moment he thought the other would leave, watching him in silence.. Instead of leaving, however, the younger leader went to his in cloth wrapped robe, going back to his former spot a moment later. Glancing at the table, the Jade saw how his lover placed a bigger bottle of massage oil on it.

,,I’m not going to do that myself.”

Jiang Cheng said, back towards the Jade, in his usual tsundere tone as he hid how flushed his face was with the way he was standing.

It wasn't the reply that clearly a part of him seemed to have wanted - who knew why or since when - but Xichen was glad that he got any type of reply at all. And that Jiang Cheng pulled out some sort of lube only to tell him seconds later to so something he was too shy to do.. That was a positively surprising around three corners reply; confirming that neither of them was ready for such a conversation yet while at the same time neither wanted to build a new - awkward - wall between them. Even less stop right there and then, ignoring that they probably should.

Smiling a little more like his usual self, the Jade walked up to the other, once more wrapping his arms around the one that stood there all still and adamant apparently to not look at him.

,,Just to make that clear: You’re not innocent. You’ve turned me into a fool several times as well already with holding back information that I damn well would’ve needed and deserved to get.”

,,Mmh.. I cannot say that your words don’t hold a certain truth within them. I will make sure to apologise deeply for that, Wanyin.~”

Jiang Cheng’s head that had until then been turned away so he didn’t have to face the Lan Sect Leader turned in an instant. His expression so full of irritation, going back and forth between shock and rage as the double meaning of the Jade’s words sank in - said in such an innocent tone as if he didn’t know what he had just said himself.

,,You really know no shame, do you? And what now? Are you still going to get something done today? If not, I’m leaving.. It’s freaking uncomfortable in those messed up pants.”

,,I wouldn’t dare let you leave in such a state, A-Cheng.. I will make sure to make you feel good.”

The younger one was so shocked from that new statement, the barely hidden arrogance within the Jades words caused by the knowledge that he had caused Jiang Cheng to feel far too good several times already. It was only more embarrassing that the tsundere could feel his length twitch as his mouth opened and closed in a desperate search to find words he could snap back..

Before he could do so though Xichen had already leaned in, capturing the Jiang Sect Leaders lips the way Jiang Cheng was most used to: slow, gentle, comforting. It was everything the smaller male had always wanted,.. and as much as a part of him wished to fight it, his body gave in so easily. Jiang Cheng was so weak for the treatment his senior was more than willing to always give.. and the next thing the younger leader knew was that while Xichen pulled his lower half close to his own, his hands were already fiddling with the upper part of his lovers robes.

,,Heavens.. How much do you wear on a daily basis..”

Xichen looked down at his lover who had broken the kiss, a little confused but more so startled. The younger ones tone had been so full of frustration, which of course meant some rage being audible as well - or else it wouldn’t be him.

,,A few layer..”

,,A few? I wear mostly two, for you there are like.. 4 or 5?!”

It was the first time that the Lan Sect Leader really witnessed the others pouty side come out. Jiang Cheng’s expression was the usual, only his lips mildly pursed, arms crossed in front of his chest as he looked at the taller ones robes like they were a threat or enemy.

Regardless of hesitating initially, Xichen began to strip - more carefully and slowly than seductively yet the way his lover glanced at him made it clear that it had effect. In truth though he went about undressing this way more so out of fear that in his current state he'd go on to rip his robes apart if he'd rush it a little.

The taller males upper robes had just fallen to the ground when Jiang Cheng's expression changed. Only a flicker, just so briefly a inner struggle was visible on his face - Xichen noticed, also the brief tensing of the others muscles as if he tried hard to refrain from covering himself, walking or at least turning away.

,,A-Cheng.. Don't-"

,,I don't know what you're talking about."

There was it again, the Jiang Sect Leaders good old facade of being tough and without emotions. Scanning his face for a second, the Jade could see right through the action of quickly pulling down his pants was nothing but an act made for distraction.. It didn't work, yet Xichen went about undressing entirely himself before he closed the gap between them.

Once again - as much as Jiang Cheng wanted to struggle himself free and run away.. as the taller male pulled his arms away from his chest, wrapping his own around him only to pull him close so much faster than the tsundere could react.. The Jiang Sect Leader wanted to allow himself to drown,.. Who was he kidding? As Xichen placed a reassuring peck on his collarbone he had long since melted and drowned in the comfort the Jade was so willing to give.

There was no need for words of clarification about what was wrong. They both knew, just like they knew that there'd be probably many more moments similar to this one. Moments where either would recall something bad, be overly aware of their imperfections, unable to drown out the sin called comparison.

They stood like that for a while until even the faintest of signs of tension had vanished from the younger males body. And in sync, not long after they ended up looking at one another - the looks they exchanged full of longing, reassurance and craving for more than the physical matters alone.. Which didn't mean they didn't want that as well, as without them even deciding it they were already lost again in another kiss.


	163. XiCheng | 86

,,Turn around.."

Not long into the kiss the Jade's hands had began to have a mind of their own. Gently but firmly caressing the younger males back and ass.. Soon followed by a few at first teasing, then a lot more craving rubs over Jiang Cheng's muscles. As the first wave of tension had faded, it flattered Xichen how quickly the first few low and shy noises escaped from his lover.

Sooner or later, as both of their patience noticeably ran out, the Lan Sect Leader broke the kiss - oblivious to how seductive and intoxicating his voice sounded, not leaving much space to say "No".

Jiang Cheng needed a second or two for his mind to go clearer again, his face going bright red then as soon as he realised what the taller male meant. It wasn't hard to put 1 & 1 together, seeing how Xichen took a step back, reached out to the lube and waited - with no mention of a room switch in sight.

,,Wh-.. You mean..?"

All Xichen did was nod, the usual angelic like smile playing on his lips as he watched the younger leader in that much of a flustered state that he wasn't aware of anything at all. Instead Jiang Cheng looked around, which stopped once the Lan Sect Leader tapped onto the table.. while the Jades expression remained the same, the smaller males shock was evident as his face distorted in horror, shame and lastly disbelief; that he voiced in a matching tone seconds after.

,,Over the table..? You want me to bend over the table?!"

,,You could lay down on it as well-

,,How can you propose such an idea in such a innocent tone??"

It was the first time in his life, the first time since knowing Lan Xichen, that the Jiang Sect Leader saw just mentioned one shrug. He hesitated, having to let it all sink in and process what had just happened but more so what was supposed to happen.

,,Lock the door."

Jiang Cheng said after quite a while, his tone both threatening yet unstable in sound as the others eyes widened in surprise. The brief hesitation from Xichen only lead to the younger one glaring at him, and so he went about doing as told.

As he turned again, the Lan Sect Leader was shocked to see that he wasn't the only one who had listened to the others wish, or command. Even though it wasn't a bend over position like Xichen had hoped, it was quite the thrilling and delicious sight.. Jiang Cheng lying there on his back, on top of the table, head turned to the side with his legs propped up but closed shut.

One thing was for sure, Lan Xichen didn't mind having to fight for his treat.

One couldn't start to imagine how embarrassed and humiliated Jiang Cheng felt.. The only thing that made it somewhat better yet worse at the same time was that his lover didn't say a word. What would he have been supposed to reply to a question along the lines of "How come you agree?" - "I thought of my ex sworn brother probably doing that thrice each day & I don't wanna look like a scared fool in comparison"?

Placing a peck on each of the younger males knees once he had walked back to the table, Xichen couldn’t deny that it was quite the delicious sight. Stroking a few times in a calming manner over his lovers thighs he waited for the other to either look at him - or at least kick him; Jiang Cheng did neither, surprisingly.

,,I won’t be able to distract you if you keep staying in that position.”

As little as the Jade could see of the Jiang Sect Leaders face, it was still visible that the latter thought for a moment - only to ultimately stick to his wrongly placed pride.

,,Fine. Not like I care.”

Oh, how Jiang Cheng actually cared about that.

Biting back a few words, the taller male then simply went along with it. Picking up the massage oil, he poured some of it on his fingers and barely hesitated in the motion he slowly grew used to: rubbing his lovers most private part. In between of doing that and gradually starting to apply pressure however the Lan Sect Leader kept his eyes on the younger one.. noticing the first signs of panic rise within Jiang Cheng. - It was anything but a lie, the tsundere noticed fast that he had dug his own grave. He had really believed he had the control and everything was great.. but honestly, the piercing stare he could feel on him and being entirely exposed while he laid there like a dead chicken without any sort of distraction that he had grown used to by then.. Heaven’s, how much the Jiang Sect Leader hated his spoiled side as much as his pride.

Jiang Cheng managed to pull through until the wild god spread him open with his first digit, even for some time after. Not that his legs hadn’t twitched in desperate want for them to get spread, but he couldn’t give in just yet. At the end it was a mixture between embarrassment, panic and how much more full he felt with his legs closed shut that caused the smaller leaders facade to fall apart.

,,Fuck..”

How much Xichen wished to be drunk and able to curse as he watched how his lovers eyes fell shut and his breath got sucked in. His own a little more heavy than usually at this point, unable to stop himself from pulling over his lower lip when Jiang Cheng’s head naturally turned and legs spread. Everything about this scene screamed “Invitation” - or “Take me now”, in a more bold term -, even his lovers voice was nothing but a overwhelmed yet not entirely satisfied lure..

It was one of those moments where the supposed perfect Jade, the most collected and calm of them all could feel himself losing control - Just that this time he was unable to stop it. He barely took it in what he was doing as he had already pushed one of Jiang Cheng’s legs out of the way and leaned over him. Attacking his neck which only resulted in another deep, growl like moan to escape from the younger male after the first caused by how sudden the by then two digits of the wild god went.

The glare the Jiang Sect Leader directed at him as he lifted his head and their from lust clouded gazes met.. left the taller one of them rather unimpressed. They were both just as lost in the madness that lust brings with itself and it was so evident - even more so as regardless of the glare, Jiang Cheng quickly wrapped his arms around the Jades neck. Xichen let his lover do as he wished, giving in a little too much until their lips crushed together and soon their tongues danced along again in such a hot, messy tango. During all of this the Lan Sect Leader didn’t fail to keep the thrusting motions of his fingers going, the little moans the other let out too much of a treat to miss out on.

How strange it was.. That they worked so well together, if drunk or not, mad or not, inside of the bedroom.. or on the table.. For a moment however the thought crossed Lan Xichen’s mind that would go on to torment the proud Jiang Sect Leader sooner or later.. If treated the right way, Jiang Cheng really wouldn’t say no to anything and accept it all in such a welcoming manner, wouldn’t he?

In fact, with each time Jiang Cheng, the most scary and proud of all sect leaders, would only grow worse and more welcoming.. Even more so active and reliant; one could also call it clingy.


	164. XiCheng | 87

The situation was a little more rough and proceeding faster than the usual routine lead by Xichen so far.. but to his positive surprise it was so evident that the other was feeling himself more and more as the time went on.. Or well, in truth Jiang Cheng was melting the more he got filled up and treated less gently. Not that he’d admit it, but the younger leader quite fancied having that side of the wild god all to himself.

However, the Lan Sect Leader wasn’t going to let his lover have what he wanted that easily, not this time - not after the few times Jiang Cheng had rubbed him the wrong way. Keeping the tongue dance going for a while, Xichen had barely thrusted the third of his digits in as he.. pulled a dick move that left the smaller male collapsing on the top of the table in shock: He simply pulled out and away, without a warning, not long before Jiang Cheng would’ve more than likely lost it; which was on purpose, as the smirk the Jiang Sect Leader spotted on the Jade’s face revealed.

,,You’re such a jerk, Huan.”

,,I told you how I felt and you wished to stay.”

Xichen’s reply came so quick and dry that even the tsundere’s glare came several seconds too late..

,,You also said you were going to apologise properly.”

,,Deeply, not properly. That’s also why I stopped. Now, if you would get to the door..”

Raising a brow to himself, Jiang Cheng didn’t know what was more off-putting: the Jade’s rough yet ever so gentle tone, or the nothing telling way he finished his sentence that was clearly supposed to remind him of something. Which it did, yet as it sank in the smaller males expression distorted in horror.

,,You don’t mean what I think you do.”

,,Mh? Oh, weren’t you the one telling me so proudly and decisive that whatever I might wish to do won’t get you to falter?”

There were two questions popping up in the younger leaders mind: 1, why couldn’t he get rid of the habit of digging his own grave and 2, when for fucks sake did Lan Xichen learn how to use one’s words against someone and push them into a corner they couldn’t get out from so damn well?

,,You don't have to push yourself if you don't want to, Wanyin."

For the first time Jiang Cheng was sure that those words were a lie getting told from his lover to give in. Of course it worked. How could he go against his own words now, after speaking that way, while being addressed by his title for once as well; which a inner voice told him was just another way to get him to give in.. Pride before sanity, even if that ultimately meant losing all pride he had left later on.

Thinking about it in the heat of the moment, as a bit of bitterness and rage took him over.. the younger one of them gritted his teeth as he got up from the table and walked to the door without looking at the wild god whatsoever. - Honestly, that was more amusing than anything for Xichen to witness as he purposefully took his time to undo both his hair accessory and forehead ribbon. And even if his lover wasn't looking at him, as he lubed himself up while shamelessly staring at the Jiang Sect Leaders backside.. The Jade knew that the other was able to hear what was going on perfectly fine.

,,Bend over a little more and relax..”

Xichen said once he had walked up behind the other, running his hands gently down the younger ones back.. and for once as Jiang Cheng threw his somewhat unreasonable fit a second later he couldn’t help but roll his eyes.

,,How am I supposed to relax in that position?!”

,,Well, it worked just fine for me twice already.”

How quick and dry the taller male replied - another time - got the Tsundere to let out a “Tsk” like sound. He couldn’t argue that and the Jiang Sect Leader really felt pissed with himself for pretty much agreeing to whatever his senior wanted. Whether that be the “What I do - you do” rule or anything else. Gritting his teeth once more, Jiang Cheng got a hold of the door knob with one hand, the palm of his other pressed against the door as he bend over.. as far as his pride let him.

,,You should refrain from thinking so much.. At this rate you’re only going to feel negatively towards something you’ve never even experienced, A-Cheng.”

,,Just get it done and over with.”

The Lan Sect Leader only let out a soft hum in response. He had leaned in already, placing soft and calming pecks on his lovers back which in turn caused the younger males threat to not sound as much like one.

After a little bit of teasing, Xichen stood back upright, positioning himself while his gaze travelled up and down on the others body. It really seemed like it wasn’t only easier for him to receive in that position but also to let go when it came to giving and staring shamelessly. Letting out a last heavy breath, he - rather slowly and gently - went about easing his length in.. And heaven’s was the Jiang Sect Leader tight, not only due to the shorter preparation period but also because of how tense he was thanks to the position.

Even though the taller one of them managed to hold back a lewd, complimenting phrase, he would’ve been shocked to see the satisfied and relieved smile like smirk playing on his lips. Jiang Cheng in turn.. he did curse, in a overwhelmed tone; unable to fully drown out the pleasure his body naturally felt in anticipation for more.

Giving them each a minute or two, Xichen put his hands on the others hips, holding him in place. For once he didn’t give a warning as he pulled almost all the way out of the younger males tightness only to push his length all the way back in until their bodies were pressing together.. Which honestly felt even better because of how Jiang Cheng tightened as he let out a surprised yet pleasured little noise while the Jade himself could barely keep his eyes from falling shut.

As humiliated and ashamed as the Jiang Sect Leader felt, he couldn’t lie about it all having a certain thrill to it.. And he would soon come to realize how different the older male was now as before he was able to snap something back for the sudden thrust the wild god already began to move again…

It was almost a little like during his first time he was more cherished than wanted and now even though cherished still, the want took the Lan Sect Leader over.. Neither of them knew which of the options they liked more.


	165. XiCheng | 88

As different as Xichen was, especially on the inside this time, he wasn’t agitated enough anymore to not give his lover a few slow thrusts to get him to adjust. It was foreign and a first time for them both after all, the position and everything combining.

At the end, after a few of the gentle like slow thrusts a shudder went through the Jiang Sect Leader, accompanied by such a heavy breath - the sign the Jade had been waiting for.

Tightening the hold on his lovers hips, the taller one of them pulled almost all the way out - Only to push his length all the way back into the others tight cage fast and somewhat hard, without a warning. For once the Lan Sect Leader wanted to let their bodies decide what they wanted, not their minds.. and the choked “Fuck” the younger one let out as he himself felt weak on his legs for a second confirmed that it probably wasn’t that bad of an idea.

Without giving the younger one the chance to snap Xichen repeated the teasing that riled them both up a few more times before he then.. picked up a pace that was neither overly slow nor gentle, watching and listening closely how the younger one struggled to keep himself up on his two feet here and there. While this time the Jade remained rather silent, it was more to take in how his lover… moaned and cursed as if they weren’t standing in front of the door anyone could pass by at any second.

Jiang Cheng really didn’t want to feel it, or make it the tiniest bit noticeable that he did.. but the more he tried the more both his mind and body betrayed him. Everything felt equally as wrong as different, not to mention that it was dead embarrassing.. but well, thanks to the different way of making love it wasn’t only his mind that shut off fast - his knot also tightened rather quickly. All he could do really was try to keep standing on his own two feet, holding onto the door knob as the Lan Sect Leader was having his way with him.. Which he had provoked himself.

Other than the younger one Xichen had endurance, he could probably go on without a release like that for half as long as a usual round, if not an entire one in case he really tried. He knew his lover quite well by then though, unable to stop a pleased smile to play on his lips as he watched how the other fell apart. The trembling, the rocking back and forth, how much more often the Jiang Sect Leaders hips and legs soon began to give in,.. And before he knew it, he had already leaned over the smaller male, placing one of his hands on the others over the door handle while his free arm got slung around Jiang Cheng’s upper body - whispering in a tone so sweet yet dirty in between of his somewhat heavy breaths into his ear.

,,Now now.. I will support you a little, we don’t want you to get hurt now do we, my dear?~”

The words hadn’t even sank in as the Tsundere felt himself get pulled up, almost standing upright with the wild god holding onto him from behind. It was a strange mixture of roughness and comfort, that Jiang Cheng wasn’t able to properly focus on since the last thing his lover had in mind was giving him a break. All he could do really was moan and fall apart, once again around the Jade that loved each second of it. The Lan Sect Leader truly loved tickling out the others weakness, making him let go.. And it didn’t take much longer before Jiang Cheng let out a final, choked curse as he tensed from head to toe, followed from a shudder as the next thrust of the wild god pushed him over the edge.

Whether it be because of the position, or over all situation.. If it wouldn’t have been for the Jade holding onto the Jiang Sect Leader as he helped the latter finish his release.. Jiang Cheng would’ve probably sank to the ground at this point. They both felt how the strength vanished from his body, together with either his pride or one of the many walls he had build around himself and clung to for most of his life.. It didn’t matter though, Lan Xichen was more than willing to catch him, hugging the younger one tightly as he pulled his length out.

,,Don’t you.. dare ever speak about this..”

,,About what?”

Xichen replied after letting out a soft huff, his tone gentle and sweet - even though he couldn’t quite believe that regardless of being unable to stand on his own and his voice being breathless, hoarse and weak his lover had nothing more on his mind than to try and put him in place.

,,Good for you.”

All the older male could do this time was let out a soft little hum, unable to ignore how flustered the other sounded; or how similar Jiang Cheng clearly was to his nephew.

,,What?!”

,,I told you I wouldn’t let go of you tonight, didn’t I?”

It was a sight, the oh so great and feared Sandu Shengshou blushing like a maiden only because of getting picked up.. His matching tone and agitation turned out to be short lived and pushed to the side by shyness and a flustered one however as the Lan Sect Leader stared down at him while reminding him almost in a professional manner of their “agreement”.

,,Did you forget?”

,,Just get me to the bed for fucks sake and stop carrying me around however you like!”

The Jade’s reaction, even though not said out loud, was a clear “No”.. a part of his “I’m not going to let you look down on me or if then for a proper reason” agenda as he simply went about ignoring Jiang Cheng while standing there.. like he wasn’t carrying around a 30 something years old feared sect leader.

For a few moments as time kept ticking by the Tsundere debated.. The strength in his legs wasn’t quite back yet, he didn’t want to hurt his pride any more either though.. but it made click fast that he’d need to either way. Abandoning the remaining bits of his pride, Jiang Cheng gritted his teeth, his face red as a tomato as he pressed out one word that was all the Lan Sect Leader had really wished to hear.

,,Please.”

,,Whatever you wish, my dear.~ It isn’t that hard to properly ask for what you want, is it?~”

God, how hard Jiang Cheng had to fight against the urge to further dig his own grave with the wrong comment due to how innocently and sweetly Xichen responded as he already found himself getting carried bridal style to the bedroom.

A few of the comments the Tsundere had in mind were for example: “Like your cock.”, “Like the way we just had sex.”, “As if you know what hard means”.. When did he turn into such a lowlife copy of Wei Wuxian? Was Wei Wuxian contagious after all? Or at least his character and dumbness?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit of a shorter Update this time - not by much, most chapters are longer than the previous ones - but.. I'm trying to get back to 2 updates a week and my private life is less stressful now again as well so..
> 
> I'm nowhere near done with those two - ok, let's be real.. I'm nowhere near done with any of them.


	166. XiCheng | 89

They had barely arrived in the bedroom and Jiang Cheng already found himself laying on the bed with the wild god hovering over him like a hawk that didn’t have a scared rabbit to devour in a lifetime. It was.. intimidating and overwhelming, causing the tsundere to blurt out one of the most embarrassing sentences of his lifetime in almost a begging tone.

,,At least let me spread my legs, would you?”

It worked, the Lan Sect Leader paused and blinked, both startled and confused.. as he watched how the younger one went about rambling while pushing the poor pillow that had done nothing wrong in a comfy place and spreading his legs - only for Jiang Cheng to finish all of that off with plopping down on the pillow, the sulk even though suppressed so noticeable with only the in front of his chest crossed arms missing.

,,Stop acting like you haven’t had it in years.. What’s with all the impatience.. And everyone says I’m a nightmare.. You’ve been a prick all day long yourself.. There, you have it.”

Xichen couldn’t keep in the heartfelt laughter for quite a bit, it was just so clear that his lover didn’t even realize he said out loud what was going through his head. It was adorable, in short - in fact.. Yet to the Jade’s surprise as he opened his eyes again, gazing down at the other, Jiang Cheng was staring up at him. The Jiang Sect Leaders expression wasn’t all that hard to read, he looked stunned, trapped in a state of awe - which he was, because really.. he hadn’t seen the “laughing face” of his senior often; not that many of their generation had much reason to laugh.

The wild god in turn barely felt how one side of his lips lifted in this equally as hot as breathtaking mix of a lovesick like smile and an a little arrogant smirk.

,,You’re staring at me so intensely, do you simply like looking at me or do I have something on my face?”

After spending a couple of seconds doing nothing but stare at one another in this silently loving manner Xichen spoke up - half intending to tease which was audible yet also just a little soft hint to it. The tsundere’s eyes widened, he had been completely lost and was only coming back around now - his face burning within a mere second as the Jiang Sect Leader instantly turned his head away and replied in.. a tone that was supposed to be his usual one, that ended up sounding unsteady and unsure instead.

,,It’s nothing.”

,,Mh? It’s not nothing, isn’t it? A-Cheng?”

,,What?!”

The Jiang Sect Leader snapped back, ignoring the blush that seemed to turn into his constant companion only to glare at the wild god.. Who gave him the final blow once their eyes were locked, in a tone so honest, seductive and sweet.

,,No matter the angle I look at you from, I cannot refrain or blind myself from how handsome you are. Even if you rarely look relaxed or friendly, you’ve always had your own charm.. your own effect on people that draws their attention towards you.”

If Jiang Cheng would’ve only been a little more drunk those few words would’ve probably been enough to make him run and cry alone in a corner - being just so tipsy, the pure fact that there was no way on earth Lan Xichen would lie still made his mind shut off and eyes water slightly. Only when the Jade noticed how the younger males lips and the muscles of his jaw began to quiver in an attempt to - quite frankly - ruin the moment he leaned in and brushed his lips against the others.

It was the perfect timing, the smaller ones mind had barely cleared, now the gentle gesture completed by their lips meeting ever so gently and lovingly.. Jiang Cheng couldn’t snap out of it entirely fast enough for him to already melt again, only starting to wish to bathe more in all the luxury Lan Xichen was.

There were many underlying things going on between them that they didn’t take note of at the time. Whether it be the Jade’s inner turmoil of having sides inside of him lurk that he was somewhat afraid of.. while it turned out time and time again that his true self must be the loving, gentle man that he was once again with Jiang Cheng just now. Or the younger ones battle with himself and if he should allow himself to grow soft in his frozen heart without knowing the waves that could come over him then. Everything was different, yet the same for them both at the same time - they were like two sides of one coin.

Everything from there on came naturally to them once more. Not even that long into the kiss the taller one teased the others lips with the tip of his tongue, asking for entrance which Jiang Cheng reacted a little too fast to. The Tsundere was really a sucker for any type of affection, soon showing hints of it himself as his fingers began to clumsily but gently run over the Jades back. Here and there Xichen teased, pressing himself down on his lover which again prompted the latter to give in a little too fast - not that either minded it or cared at that moment in time.

At the end however Xichen paused the moment, breaking the kiss only to place a little peck on the tip of the Jiang Sect Leaders nose. A moment later he was already up and gone with his loving, somewhat upbeat sounding "I'll be right back.~" lingering in the air.

While the wild god was really only gone for a couple of seconds, retrieving the massage oil from the table - the younger one spend the entire few seconds trying to calm himself. He felt weird. His heart was pounding like mad, his face burning still.. or again, he couldn't even make that out anymore.

,,You're hurrying so much for a moment I debated if I should worry you'd trip, fall and break your neck. Quite desperate aren't you?"

,,How could I not rush to be back by your side?"

Jiang Cheng didn't know if his face distorted in horror and disgust because of the cheesy attack from his lover or because his heartbeat felt the need to do the weirdest of rhythmic games in reply.

,,So needy."

The younger one tried to sound annoyed and displeased. Like before, as soon as he was back Xichen was straight away not so straight all over him again - nibbling on his neck.

Instead of replying, the Jade sat back up, pouring some of the oil onto the quite confused looking Jiang Sect Leaders chest. Only when his hands had started to massage the scarred skin did Xichen speak up in a innocent tone that didn't quite manage to drown out the intent to tease.

,,If I am too much for you maybe I should persuade someone else.."

,,Whatever."

The younger one pressed out in between of his gritted teeth. He fell into the Lan Sect Leaders traps so easily, who had struggled with keeping a bit of a laugh in due to the death glare Jiang Cheng had directed at him.

There were a few things the tsundere really didn't like. One of those was having to give up on what was his.. The other having to share what was his.. However, Lan Xichen wasn't his, yet just like with the maiden it brought him the greatest amount of displeasure to think about the Jade being all of this around someone else. Not that Jiang Cheng wanted the older male to himself, absolutely not, it was just.. a matter of principle. And absolutely nothing more than that.


	167. XiCheng | 90

Honestly Jiang Cheng didn't need to say the words he didn't want to say. Other than what he thought his emotions were always - in one way or another - so obviously written all over his face. For the Jade it was just so adorable to witness the others face distort in such clear displeasure or how the younger males mind clearly didn't work once hints of rage took him over.. because how, if sane for just a second, could Jiang Cheng think that Lan Xichen would get up and search for someone else? Hadn't he been the one in the first place to ask clearly, even though around a few corners, what their status was now?

,,Your chest feels a lot less tight than a few days back.."

The Jiang Sect Leader blinked, only for his brows to raise in question a short moment later. He could've easily fallen asleep, already spaced out with his mind trailing off while at the same time he didn't take in where to. It wasn't much different for Xichen whose mind was wandering as well - how couldn't it, looking at the mess his hands were gently tending to. He also only realized a few seconds later that he had said what went through his mind.

At the end the older one had to tap with the tips of his finger onto said less tight area for the tsundere to understand and speak up in a bit more of a relaxed tone.

,,Well, think about what I've done the past few days….. Exactly, nothing."

Jiang Cheng had given his lover a moment, a few seconds long break before finishing that part of his speech off as the Lan Sect Leaders expression gave away he had a belated moment of enlightenment.

,,You should take better care of your health, Wanyin."

,,You can say that so easily because you have two more skilled possible sect leader around you that are relatives as well."

The younger one replied after letting out a amused huff, that only caused Xichen to worry more than even feel guilty.

,,I've started to train more to distract myself. Possible I've overdone it but I'm fine."

Jiang Cheng added and the Jade understood what he meant even if he didn't say it properly.

The tsundere had to distract himself due to his nephew being at the age where he had to learn how to fly and live on his own.. and that the Lan Sect Leader shouldn't worry - not that Xichen wouldn't continue doing do even if that was the last thing Jiang Cheng wanted.

,,Alright.”

That was all the taller one of them said, if everything would proceed how he wished they would have enough time to talk more deeply about all of that still. Right now, however, he wanted to keep the other safe and secure, comfortable as well and far away from his problems.

Xichen was just about to reach for the oil as Jiang Cheng had already beat him to it. The younger one had sat up and reached out so fast the other was mildly stunned to say the least.. Even more so as he took note of the dirty little smirk that was playing on his lovers lips as he eyed him up and down while letting quite a bit of oil drip down on his hand.

,,You don’t have to-”

,,Huan.. Don’t you dare think you can do whatever you want with me and I won’t do a little selfish act myself.~”

It was possible that the tsundere was only digging his grave further, yet he couldn’t refrain from whispering so dangerously threatening and seductively against the taller leaders lips as his in massage oil drenched hand had already gotten wrapped around Xichen’s aching problem. He probably shouldn’t be anymore at this point, yet Jiang Cheng was actually still surprised that even with all the delay his lovers length hadn’t retired even the tiniest bit.

Not much time had to pass with how intense their eye contact was, the stares so full of want and things they didn’t want to admit at this point, or how close yet far their lips were… before the Lan Sect Leader reached up, getting a hold of the back of the younger ones head as their lips already slammed together. If anyone would witness them acting like teenagers in a constant state of heat.. Well, who cared really - they for sure didn’t. Only seconds later were their tongues dancing a hot tango again, a minute or two later Jiang Cheng was already pushed back down on the bed with the wild god hovering above him. What they were doing was like a rollercoaster ride: bringing one another down with a brief moment of seriousness, only to rile one another up so much more than before.

Which happened even more intensely now as the misbelief a part of the tsundere had about having the control caused him to be.. so much more open. Xichen could feel the invitation, how his lovers legs got propped up on each side of his waist, one arm wrapping around his neck as the one drenched in oil got a hold of his back.. As a lover of art, for the Jade there was no better frame than Jiang Cheng and he wouldn’t retreat before he was just mentioned ones as well.

There was no need for words, for once the Lan Sect Leader was more than sure of that. And so, not long after the younger one had ended up pressed in the sheets again, he reached down and.. quite clumsily, yet with success, positioned himself before letting his length disappear once again in the tight cage of his lover. Even though neither was able to speak, the moan they let out in sync was equally as sinful as relieved.. a “Finally”, or “That’s better” without words. And it was the truth, they both felt it.. Whether it be the welcoming clenching of his lovers tight yet loose muscles for the Jade, or the twitch against his weak spot and the feeling of being full for the tsundere. Maybe it was wrong, it probably was in some ways, yet having their bodies actually combined was what drowned out the loneliness the both of them secretly felt deep down inside the most. Not that every other way didn’t make them feel that way, yet there was no deeper confirmation for not being alone than two bodies being combined in the most intimate of ways.

,,Relax and enjoy, Wanyin.~"

Was all the older male whispered ever so sweetly and softly into the Jiang Sect Leaders ear during the short moment where he broke the kiss - only to start a new one mere seconds later..

Jiang Cheng would soon get to know just what on earth he had gotten himself into.. But more than anything that no matter how many sides there may be to Lan Xichen - The Jade still got the most out of it to give someone else the best of treatments while gaining little bits and pieces here and there himself.

And even if Jin GuangYao had always been called the one that knows each and every single detail about others the best.. Be it the years long influence of the now long deceased or not: The Lan Sect Leader wasn't lacking when it came to that regard either. He knew perfectly fine, almost naturally, which were the right buttons to push, or how and when to do so.


	168. XiCheng | 91

Within the next hour, maybe one and a half, Xichen indulged in making his lover fall apart. His thrusts slow and gentle, all the way in and out, making sure to tease the spot that drove Jiang Cheng wild as often as he possibly could. He didn't even care about getting it off, which showed in him only getting close to the edge of his first release after the younger one of them had cum for the second time.

The younger leader was melting like ice cream put out in the summer, exposed to the heat of the burning sun. He was drowning more and more, his mind so clouded and shut down that he really.. didn't have a care in the world left for pretty much anything. There were only the faintest traces of his usual self left, yet he was unable to voice them because whenever he tried the wild god made sure to stop him. At other times Jiang Cheng couldn't, he was a moaning mess, legs and arms already wrapped around the Jade.

For quite a while Xichen didn't dare to speak either, holding back all the sweet little things he would've usually whispered and moaned in his lovers ear.. As much as he had ached to do so until now, he didn't feel like getting something snapped back at him this time. However, now that he was getting close, feeling the Jiang Sect Leader fall apart underneath him yet again as well.. He couldn't stop himself as his thrusts went a little rougher, trying to hit deeper than he could in their current position. The room was already filled from their scents, the wet squelching noises and sinful sounds of pleasure.

Jiang Cheng could feel himself get close once again as the taller one of them started to whisper romantic, sweet and embarrassing little nothings into his ear.. There was nothing the Jade didn't comment on, from how good he felt, how good the Jiang Sect Leader felt, how sweet the latter was and sounded.. How handsome he was even, how he wouldn't stop throughout the night one more time.

And then finally, after an endless amount of time had passed, they both tensed and choked out sinful versions of each others given names. Neither had thought it was really possible, yet the high they catapulted one another on only went better and better the more often they embraced one another. There was no need for Jiang Cheng to even touch himself, not that the wild god would've allowed it.. But more than anything there was no sign of growing tired of it all in sight.

Which only showed further as Xichens thrusts only grew slower for a while but never truly stopped - yet again another time.

The way the Lan Sect Leader used his hips caused the other pretty soon to let out a overwhelmed, already somewhat exhausted sounding curse.. that really only caused Xichen to feel more sure and satisfied with himself. Jiang Cheng in turn had the little mind-fuck of feeling as if he as only getting tighter, mostly caused by the taller males lust getting pushed deeper.. Apart from that he felt relaxed, the Jiang Sect Leader had had a good time, the “foreplay” earlier, now this.. never ending round.

Jiang Cheng would more than likely pass out at some point, love bites on his neck, hips aching and full to the brim.. Which Xichen passionately tried to turn into reality as to the younger leaders displeasure he sat up - well, more or less -.. It wasn’t until the Jade got a hold of one of the tsundere’s legs that the latters jaw dropped and mind cleared a little.

,,The hell?!”

,,Trust me and relax - don’t think, my dear.~”

Heavens, why did this guy that put him in the most embarrassing positions have to look so damn good while doing so? Even now, as one of his legs rested over the wild god’s shoulder with Xichen whispering against his overheated skin, giving it a brush with his wet and swollen lips.. An overkill was probably still an understatement, yet how his lover looked at him in between while resting his head on his leg.. Jiang Cheng hated that he loved each second of it and even more so that his body was - in a positive way - so screwed by then that he couldn’t even tense, even less put up a fight.

,,Fucking humiliating..”

,,Oh? For that you seem to overly like what you see and feel A-Cheng.~”

Jiang Cheng hadn’t even finished what he ached to mutter under his breath as the prim and proper Jade already hit him with another brick right in the balls. The younger ones almost colored eyes instinctively snapped to his lover, who’s brows were provocatively raised, a smirk playing on his lips that made it clear the Jiang Sect Leaders reaction only made him more pleased. Staring for a few seconds, speechless, wide-eyed and red as a tomato the tsundere didn’t even know what to do let alone say anymore.

He let himself get dominated by Lan Xichen - and that not even with physical strength.. how low did he even sink?

At the end the younger leader just let it happen. “It” meaning that the Jade went about forcing his other leg over his shoulder as well.. and once the first purposefully, teasingly hard thrust happened without a warning the tsundere let out a surprised wince. Xichen in turn chuckled, a little bit of a dark one for his standards, because no matter how his lover glared at him he hadn’t sounded displeased at all.

Once the Lan Sect Leaders "Was there something?~" expression faded the other was only stopped from snapping something back along the lines of "I really hate you" when the taller one of them picked up the pace again. Rather slow thrusts with a hard one against Jiang Cheng's sweet spot here and there.

How terrible was it that Lan Xichen really loved life at that moment in time? Even more with each time the smaller one of them ultimately lost the fight he tried to put up, soon letting out the most lewd, pleasures and overwhelmed sounds.

Either way, the worst mistake Jiang Cheng made was to try and hide his face. It only riled the Jade up more, the game of trying to get his lover to at first remove the arm from his face - then either turn his head around to beg with those from pleasure clouded, light coloured eyes for more closeness.. maybe if he'd try hard enough the tsundere would even ask for it? Not that Xichen would mind it being some distorted cursed order or actual "begging" - He really wasn't that picky, nor taking in the way he thought right then and there.

,,You’re.. feeling great.. aren’t ya?”

The younger one of them somehow managed to sound threatening even as his body rocked back and forth from the Jade’s movements.. Which also made his voice sound quite off in general, if one would ignore the breaks he needed as he tried to suppress his moans. To his shock though all Xichen did was chuckle and let out an agreeing hum.. Why did this demon have to look so remotely decent even now? The sweat wasn’t distorting his visuals at all, the redness on his face at just the right spots, muscles popping and expression seductive as anything - not to mention the pleasure from more than one thing that the Lan Sect Leader wasn’t able to hide.


	169. XiCheng | 92

Even though it hadn’t been exactly one of the statements he had hoped for, something inside of Xichen decided that it was “Good enough”.. Maybe he just tried to find an excuse for his own aching to be closer to the other again as well.. No, he definitely was trying to find an excuse.

Leaning over, there were a lot of noises happening.. Jiang Cheng cursing in a few different ways, groaning as well while he tried to adjust to his legs getting forced down as well. He wasn’t biologically made for being folded into half his size and even less prepared for that.

,,I probably should’ve warned you-”

,,For fuck you should’ve!”

The smaller leader snapped back as his hands tugged onto the blanket below him, breathing somewhat erratic as his muscles already now screamed at him that he would regret all of that for several days after at least. It was also more irritating than helpful that his lover tried to calm him down and get him to relax with those soft little pecks getting placed on his neck as well as all over his face.

,,I’m never going to press a slice of bread in half again..”

The statement was so random and out of the blue that even the prim and proper Lan Sect Leader couldn’t help but crack up. Bread wasn’t too common for the average folks especially, yet some richer people did have it here and there - as a semi-permanent resident of the richest of all Sects of course Jiang Cheng had his experience with the finer things in life.

,,Great that at least one of us is having a laugh.”

,,Please forgive me.. You’re just so.. adorable when your mind isn’t clear enough to rage properly..”

Xichen replied in between of his laughter, the sulking look on the Jiang Sect Leaders face really didn’t help his attempt at calming down either. Just as the younger one of them was about to say something else though the Jade brushed his lips over the others before rubbing his nose against the latters.

,,Acting all cute isn’t going to make me forget, ya know.”

,,Mmh.. But I know what will, A-Cheng.~”

The tsundere’s tone had already started to sound more hypnotised again, the Lan Sect Leaders in turn melodic, intoxicatingly sweet and promising. Letting the tension build for a few more seconds at the end their lips still met again and regardless of aching muscles and all of those ugly little details they began to feel so cozy and comfortable within a moment or two.

It took a while before the younger ones slightly pained sounding groans changed slowly to more pleasured, sweet moans again. Xichen knew quite well by then how to use his hips to get his lover to feel good and with the strange new position it seemed to be even easier to reach the Jiang Sect Leaders weak spot.

They were a mess at this point already, not to mention the poor sheets. Jiang Cheng's upper body was covered in his own seed and due to how close they mostly were - almost melting into one - the situation on Lan Xichen's wasn't much better. The noises in the room were so telling.. wet squelching sounds as the wild god tried his hardest to push his lust in deeper into the others tight cage while some leaked out. The sounds of kissing, tongues constantly intertwined, skin slapping against skin, rustling of the sheets underneath them.

It went on like that until Jiang Cheng tensed and shuddered once again as another wave of a release took him over - with the Lan Sect Leader having barely sped up the pace of his thrusts. They were moaning messes lost in the clouds of pleasure and faint hints of falling in love.

,,Fuck.. I think I'm going to pass out.."

The smaller male said in between of letting out the heaviest of breaths. By then he felt tingly, weak yet relaxed from head to toe with his mind being anywhere but close to where it belonged. Jiang Cheng's tone so rough, yet before he could even let his arms fall down - they had been slung around the Jades neck - the Lan Sect Leader already spoke up in a tone so sexy yet sweet it was definitely a crime.

,,I'm not going to let you, not yet.~"

Jiang Cheng's mind hadn't even managed to process those words yet as he felt how the older one of them sat up. From there things happened far too quick, the Jiang Sect Leader got flipped around like a pancake without knowing what the hell was going on.. And there he was, sitting on Lan Xichen's lap, legs on either side, jaw dropped unable to say or do a thing while his lover smirked at him.

,,Are you feeling humiliated again, A-Cheng?~"

Xichen couldn't deny how much he loved each second of it. The way his lovers expression dropped, cheeks so red and hair that hadn't been undone before such a mess - making the glare and the gritted teeth lose all of their remaining threatening ability. He had somehow gathered that this position together with the bend over one from before would probably be the worst for the tsundere.. In their usual one there wasn't much to see, right now though.. Nothing was hidden, neither Jiang Cheng's hardened nipples, his in lust covered upper body, face.. even less his length that was as hard as it can be, standing as if it wasn't doing so since a few hours by now, leakage making it just that much better and far more real.

,,You are suddenly so silent, A-Cheng.~”

,,Shut up!”

As hard as Jiang Cheng tried to sound like his usual self once again, his voice was unstable, hesitant and cracked from how awkward he felt and how shy he could actually be. The way the younger one tried to cover himself with his arms really didn’t make anything better either.

With a smirk playing on his lips the Jade then sat up rather quickly, faces too close yet not close enough for their lips to meet - only their breaths were tickling on one anothers heated skin. The Jiang Sect Leaders gaze was flickering about, trying not to look which he ultimately did at the end either way while the taller one of them stared like most of the time quite shamelessly.

,,Always threatening and glaring.. Don't you at times grow tired from behaving this way, A-Cheng? Apart from that, you got what you wanted.~"

,,What I wanted?!"

There was it again, the sweet as anything smile of the Lan Sect Leader.. that wasn't able to drown out the fact his eyes showed both seduction and a amused hint. At first Xichen only let out a hum for confirmation purposes while his hands reached up to ever so gently and carefully undo his lovers hair.. in between he went about explaining with words, his tone the usual.

,,You always wish to have the control, the upper hand.. As far as my studies taught me, there's in this setting no better position for you to have it than this one or several other variations of it."

Jiang Cheng wasn't all too sure if he even wanted to get to know the "variations" the other spoke of. He wanted to get away, while at the same time he didn't.. It was terrible, yet there was something inside of him that didn't want to stop feeling all the ways Lan Xichen made him feel. Whether it was warm and secure, or worth or.. loved. Desirable, handsome, lovable in the first place. At the end all he could do was sit there on top of the Jade, his mind trailing off in two different directions: Did he want to stay, or run? If he wanted to stay, what was he even supposed to do? Would it maybe result in him wanting to run either way?

,,You're thinking too much again.. You won't know unless you tried, A-Cheng."

The Lan Sect leader reassured, placing a soft, for a few seconds lingering, kiss on the younger males lips. In between his hands found their way to get placed on the well formed and trained backside of the other, trailing gentle lines up and down on the sensitive, smooth skin.


	170. XiCheng | 93

,,So, what are you going to do, my dear?~"

Jiang Cheng gritted his teeth again. How on earth was he supposed to admit he had barely any idea what he was supposed to do even? Sure, he had read several explicit books in his life but.. this and that were different matters, obviously.

To the younger ones surprise though instead of further pushing for a reply the wild god simply laid back down. It was a sight of a different league really, the Jades ink black hair spread out like a blanket underneath him, the finely toned upper body exposed, loving gaze full of longing directed at him.. Jiang Cheng couldn't help but stare, which only lead an almost shy like version of the Lan Sect Leaders usual smile the form on his lips.

,,Lift your hips a little, so that you're more or less kneeling above me. Put your hands on my stomach if you need, or lean over and put them beside my head."

There was again no reaction coming from Jiang Cheng, he was only staring at the other like a paralysed rabbit confronted with a hawk. For sure Xichen wouldn’t let him get away like that - probably not at all.. Placing his hands back on the Jiang Sect Leaders ass, one hand cupping a cheek each, he lifted him slightly up from his still deeply buried length. In between however he made sure to keep his eyes on the younger one that yet again gritted his teeth for more than one reason.

Suppressing both a smirk and a chuckle, the supposed prim and proper Lan Sect Leader then did something not so nice. Pulling his lover up even more, he pushed the younger males hips all the way down while at the same time thrusting up with quite a bit of force - resulting in his length really getting pushed in quite deep, causing Jiang Cheng to quite literally topple over into one of the positions the Jade had mentioned before. The expression that the tsundere ended up showing after letting out quite the surprised yet sinful moan as he found himself bend over Xichen, a hand on either side of the latters head.. Jiang Cheng looked flustered, shocked, eyes wide open and jaw slightly dropped. It was amusing, yet the Lan Sect Leader couldn’t blame his lover either.. the position really had such a weird vibe to it, their faces barely a few millimetres apart, Jiang Cheng’s hair working like a curtain between them and the outside world while it was really nothing but all over the place.

,,Was that so hard, A-Cheng?~”

,,As if you know what hard even means.”

,,Oh..~”

“Fuck” was all the Jiang Sect Leader thought at that point. The way the taller one of them had responded, brows slightly raising, the strangely auspicious vibe and tone in his voice.. Could he just once - really just once - stop snapping crap back at someone without thinking and bite off more than he could ever chew? Well, one day maybe - but now it was too late and Jiang Cheng was more than hyper aware of that. He was screwed, everything about the older male made that clear.

,,Your wish is my command, my dear.~”

Was all he said still before placing quite the slap on the younger ones ass - would it leave a bruise? Probably not, but the way the Jiang Sect Leader groaned out a curse as his body rocked forward while his eyes closed.. It couldn’t have been that bad, Lan Xichen thought to himself as he smirked a little too darkly for his normal self. If Jiang Cheng wanted to get to know that side of his the Lan Sect Leader would make sure to serve him well.

Pulling his lovers ass cheeks apart a little, his hips a bit more up at the same time, Xichen didn’t even give the other much - to any - time to adjust.

Within the next couple of.. Well, neither knew nor cared much about the time that passed. The only thing that was giving away hints of it were the first bits of light that soon began to spread into the bedroom from the living room area. Or the candlelight that was the only source of light in the bedroom itself slowly growing dimmer as it grew shorter and shorter over time.

It was interesting to say the least, Xichen hadn't thought that at this point he could witness his lover fall apart any more than he had already seen. He got proven wrong though.. Jiang Cheng went nuts, completely. The Jades thrusts were hard, not overly slow either and the younger one turned into a moaning and cursing mess that could barely keep himself “upright” at times. Not that the tsundere ever sat back upright, he was completely getting lead by the other as his shaky, weak and equally as sore feeling arms gave in here and there quite a bit.

How delicious it was for the prim and proper Jade to take in how lewd and engrossed the Jiang Sect Leader was in their little game.. Moaning and cursing in a tone that only grew weaker yet more sinful and pleasured over time, right in his ear. Every so often the younger one would lift his head but his initial glare faded within minutes only.. after that, the few rare moments Lan Xichen was able to gaze up into the others almond colored eyes.. There were several things that flickered in them, one emotion at a time mostly - starting with rage, going over to some sort of fear, before Jiang Cheng got drowned from the pleasure he was receiving.

In fact the smaller male had felt all of that in one way or another. He felt rage lingering deep down because he had build up such a strong, huge wall around all of his weaknesses and hidden self that the threat of it being torn down somehow was scary. He was scared in turn as he felt himself ultimately lose the fight, a fight he had never wished to engage in in the first place - one of the endlessly many he had fought over and over again. At the end however, as roughly as Xichen was treating him, the Lan that had always been some sort of idol to him - one of which the heights he could never reach - always had this hint in his darker colored gaze.. The hint of reassurance, that twitch of a smile that Jiang Cheng had seen many times on him that meant “It’s alright” framing his fine facial features.

That’s how it happened, as after several times of searching for that the younger one of them finally let go. And no matter how he would think or talk about it later on, he had to do so at some point anyway or? He couldn’t go on for the next maybe 50 or more years never actually letting go, could he? He hadn’t even reached his mid-thirties yet but if properly medically examined he’d more than likely be close to a qi-deviation at this point.. Hell, maybe he had one already but he had shut himself and his emotions down so far he didn’t even realize it happened - Who knew really?


	171. XiCheng | 94

,,Harder..”

For a moment the Lan Sect Leader could’ve sworn he heard things, absurd things. It wasn’t until the younger one lifted his head, resting their foreheads together - staring straight into his eyes with both of theirs by then showing so clearly how high up in the clouds they were. Xichen hesitated though, even losing the rhythm of his thrust a moment or two, which only caused his lovers expression to distort briefly into displeasure.

,,Are you sure?”

,,Fuck.. yeh... “

They were both so breathless and engrossed that the Jade actually had to stop moving altogether for a few seconds so they could get out those few words - Jiang Cheng was by far in a worse state than he himself though, not that it was surprising.. Okay, it was a little at least. Scanning the smaller males eyes once more to see if he was actually serious.. Xichen then did as told.

From there on out everything turned into a blur. The Lan Sect Leader was.. quite literally, trying his hardest without actually harming the younger male - While sooner or later Jiang Cheng’s hips began to have a bit of a life of their own as well; clumsily and with a lot of trial and error, but they did. Somehow they managed to get even louder. Somehow no one felt interrupted enough by any of it to storm in, or at least knock on the door.

Honestly by the time their bodies stopped moving on their own even Xichen didn't know for how much longer he would've been able to last. They both had released quite a lot throughout the last couple of days, including only hours before the current escalation. Maybe another round would've been fine with him, he'd probably not released any lust at all anymore though. Still trapped in the middle of the rush of hormones and endorphins he didn't even feel the pain he more than likely should've felt by then either.

Jiang Cheng was as completely gone out as during the last few rounds they had had. He had simply collapsed down on the Jades upper body, they were so ridiculously covered in sweat and the younger ones lust it wasn't even funny. The breath of neither of them grew steady fast, all over the place panting as if they had run a marathon, or several.

The taller one of them could faintly feel the last few twitches from both the Jiang Sect Leaders tight, filled to the brim cage, but also the length that was trapped in between of their bodies. Somehow Xichen began to fear that he had overdone it, there were quite a few shudder going through Jiang Cheng still for a longer while, followed from shivering and a.. little something that made the Lan's heart melt as he knew it was probably a once in a lifetime experience: The completely weakened, defenseless Jiang Cheng rested his head, more his cheek, on his shoulder, nuzzling against him.

Without a word being said from either of them the Lan Sect Leader had rather quickly began to gently caress the others back.. He was just about to break the silence, say that they should at least separate their lower halves first and get themselves covered with the blanket.. However, as Xichen leaned his head a little to the side, lips already parted, he refrained from doing so - There was no chance for a fast asleep certain someone to react to anything anyway and the last that the taller male wanted was to disturb his lover.

After letting quite a while pass to make sure Jiang Cheng was deep enough trapped into his slumber to not wake up the other then let his slowly retiring length slide out of the younger one - it was a little complicated of a move, the Jade was barely able to hold back a chuckle yet honestly.. the amused but more than anything touched little smile had never faded from his lips anyway. It turned out to not be the worst part of his upbringing, the extensive physical training, as he wrapped an arm around the Jiang Sect Leaders hips, the other around his shoulders - and somehow Xichen did manage to get up from the bed without dropping the other or even worse toppling over. To him, Jiang Cheng really wasn't that heavy.. but more than anything he was successful because even in his sleep the koala side of his lover caused just mentioned one to instinctively wrap his legs around him.

Using his chance, Xichen quickly - and in a complicated, unhealthy looking manner - pushed the blanket on one side of the bed before laying down in just as weirdly of a way again. He'd rather get crushed from the smaller ones weight or whatever else could happen than wake him up - even less accept a change of position. The Jade probably worried for no reason though since all Jiang Cheng did during all of the "commotion" was frown a little and let out a barely audible displeased groan.

,,Forgive me, my dear, but you don't wish to get sick, do you?"

The older one of them whispered so softly as the Jiang Sect Leader had stirred a little once the blanket was covering them. Xichen's expression was nothing but relaxed.. combined with a good amount of love sickness as he went about carefully stroking a few strands of Jiang Cheng's sweaty hair out of his face. As once again no negative reaction came he stroked just as carefully with the back of his fingers over the younger males cheek before giving in to his own urges: wrapping his arms around his lover, squeezing him gently before spending another good amount of time just staring at Jiang Cheng. Xichen was fully aware that he'd only have that chance once, more than likely, and that the smaller one of them would just as highly likely try to run as soon as he woke up to find himself in the position they were in…

Neither the awake, nor asleep, version of Lan Xichen favoured that idea.. Which Jiang Cheng got to know at some point as the candle had already died and the natural lightening had mostly spread through to the bedroom. He only woke up briefly, having had such a good nights rest that he didn't believe he could have anymore since years.. And even though he didn't try really, as he acted as if he was trying to escape the Lan Sect Leaders hug didn't loosen the slightest, tiniest of bits.

Jiang Cheng though.. Hell, he would never admit it. There'd be no way he would.. yet.. as the first unavoidable wave of embarrassment had vanished mostly.. The last thing he could do was lie about the fact that it felt good. He felt good. Not only good.. it was warm, comfortable. Such a strong sense of being protected and loved drowned him in his still mostly asleep state.. It was just as unavoidable, inevitable, that it would scare the heck out of him one day, maybe many.. many, many times and he'd further try to run or destroy it.. But before he knew it he had already let out a defeated sigh, feeling the muscles in his face distort in some manner he wasn't used to as he let his eyelids fall shut again and himself asleep.

Jiang Cheng fell back asleep, with a content little smile playing on his lips. His cheeks tinted in a light shade of pink. And just like the hours before, the time he spend sleeping still on top of the Lan Sect's older Jade was the best rest he had had in years - even in comparison to the one time he had fallen asleep cuddled up to Lan Xichen before.

They fell asleep far too late, yet once again neither of them had any nightmares - which usually they were both getting haunted from.


	172. The Second Last Morning

The morning was strange, to say the least. Even the off Wen Ning, Lan Zhan, Lan Xichen combination from before was nothing against how odd everything felt right now.

Wei Wuxian only glanced at his husband here at there, his expression impossible to describe - while Lan Wangji eyed his other half rather openly, almost as if he was trying to see something.

Not that the Juniors understood what was going on.. They only briefly took note of the married couples odd behaviour as well because.. They honestly neither knew how to act around one another after the last night, but even less did they dare look into their seniors eyes. Sizhui was the only one who was pretty much acting like always.. Jingyi was weirdly silent because of his hangover and Jin Ling.. The youngest ones problem was probably a combination of factors yet at the end still more the fact that he had told Sizhui what he had and.. He had woken up cuddling with Sizhui, able to recall everything that had happened between them.

Wen Ning had joined them, late - but he did, yet he was also.. First of all dressed in the wrong clothing and staring at the table without even greeting anyone - that wasn't like him at all, yet they were all too deeply trapped into their own states of mind and issues to push for answers from anyone else.

The only two that were missing were of course Lan Xichen and Jiang Cheng. They were also the only topic that managed to get Wei Wuxian's attention, as he at some point asked where they were - Jin Ling then felt Sizhui nudge him in the side, causing him to come up with an excuse after clearing his throat.

,,As far as I know they are discussing more matters for the schooling program."

For a brief second doubt flickered through the former Patriarch's eyes, yet at the end he shrugged it off and proceeded to stuff his face with quite the loads of food.

The next time something got most of their attention was as Nie Huaisang stepped in the dining hall of his sect. Walking up to the middle of it before he began to talk, or more explain how the current and last complete day of his sects festival would proceed and so forth. What got their attention was how Wen Ning's eyes seemed to be glued to the Sect Leader, while Nie Huaisang in turn also here and there looked at the other.. yet for the time being they didn't try to interrogate either as well.

,,As everyone should know, today marks the last day of this event. I am grateful for everyone who decided to attend and for how smoothly everything proceeded. As you all know as well, health was an important matter which is why for the most part the duration spend outside was so short. You are free to spend the hours until the next meal outside, to apply the finishing touches on your sculptures and after the luncheon everyone is asked to gather outside again. Even though there is no official rating, it is still the most basic of respect we can pay to take a walk and look at the sculptures of everyone who attended instead of just our own, or those of our own sects. Again, I am deeply grateful."

After taking a short break and letting out a heavy breath that could easily be categorised as a relieved one a more easy-going and almost cheerful expression spread over Nie Huaisang's face.

,,On a less serious note, during and after the final meal today everyone will be free to drink. I will also join into that festivity."

Once that was said and having completed the basic bowing ceremony Nie Huaisang then went over to his table where a few servants began to build a group around him - more than likely trying to discuss further details for the day and the last few hours on the next.

Everyone was surprised, or more.. shocked. It really must've been the first time anyone in the hall could recall or had witnessed the "Headshaker" speak fluently.. in front of a crowd.. like an actual sect leader.. no "I don't know's" in sight.

No one knew what to think of that - even less how to react.

The only ones that managed to get even more mind-blown were those around Wen Ning.. Because not long after having sat down, he arose again from his seat and walked pretty straight towards the Ghost General. No fear in sight, a rather easy-going but short little chat between two.. friends? Even Huaisang's expression was quite lively, nice and sweet while his tone didn't leave much - to any - room for arguments.

,,I'm sorry for interrupting but, if you have time, could you accompany me for a while?"

,,I.. I think so.."

Wen Ning responded, a little awkwardly as always even though his "soul" felt glad that the sect leader at least hadn't addressed him in front of everyone too intimately. He also got up rather quickly to make sure it would stay that way and left just as fast to avoid all the stares that he knew would get directed at them.

Due to that however the General also wasn't aware of the fact that, as he tried to pass by Wei Wuxian, Nie Huaisang had gotten stuck. The older one of the former friends had gotten a hold of the Nie Sect Leaders arm, not overly gently either and pulled him down enough to be able to threateningly whisper something in his ear.

,,Huaisang, I don't know what you're plotting this time but lay a hand on Wen Ning and you'll have a real problem."

However, to all of their shock the smallest of them all only chuckled - quite darkly as well before he replied in a matching tone.. After ripping himself free from the former Patriarchs hold, staring straight into his eyes as if his fearful side didn't even exist.

,,Quite ironic of you to say that, A-Xian, isn't it? Wasn't almost everything bad that happened to him caused by you? Ah, I forgot.. You're spending your new life acting as if your past doesn't exist. Everything he has done, he did, without being in his right mind because you were the one leading.. no, controlling him. Let him have one good thing in his life while you have almost everything one could dream of, would you?"

Well, there was definitely more than one jaw that dropped and more than one person could neither stop flashbacks from clouding their mind or feeling like it was the truth. Even Jin Ling, as much as he tried to hate Wen Ning for being the one to end his father's life couldn't say it wasn't the reality behind it all. Even Lan Wangji decided to stay out of it, such moments where inevitable no matter how much the love of his life would try to run - he remained silent, ready to catch Wei Ying when he would fall..

And oh, how Wei Wuxian fell. His expression dropped, the bits of color on his face faded almost instantly as well as Nie Huaisang gave him a last telling, almost judging look before turning on his heel and disappearing.

Needless to say that the breakfast had come to a sudden, not so pleasant ending with that. An ending that had to happen for once. Huaisang wasn't an asshole, not that badly of an asshole at least.. but he knew better than anyone that if his friends truly wanted to find their happiness they'd need to stop running, confront themselves with everything and then proceed to walk.. Hell, even crawl, but not this farce of a life everyone around him - including himself - tried to keep up.

It didn't take long then before the remaining 5 of the group separated as well. The Juniors went outside, doing what they needed to on their sculptures without saying much for many reasons. Only WangXian stayed in for quite a while before eventually joining them as well.. Wei Wuxian seemed to have pulled himself together, at least momentarily, but again.. That was not how the future would work out and he'd soon began to think and do many things.. Things he should've done a lifetime ago already.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a little disclaimer, from here on out there'll be quite a few emotional ups and downs. Possible that I'll post longer chapters but shorter updates once I've finished enough bits and pieces.
> 
> Hope you enjoy and thank you for reading!


	173. A conversation that's long overdue | 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beware of the emotional rollercoaster

To Jin Ling's and Jingyi's surprise as they were the first of the torn group to arrive in the door frame that lead into the dining hall.. There were the missing children.. or well, Seniors.

Walking up to them both of the young men bowed, greeting their elders with respect before taking a seat themselves. Time was flying by on their last day, which was quite the shame because the buffets just kept getting better and better.

To their further surprise though while Lan Xichen shined even more brightly than usually, as if he had finally merged into one with the sun itself.. Jiang Cheng only briefly looked at them, causing the young ones to exchange a look - Sandu Shengshou too knocked out to even glare? What on earth was going on?

As if all of that wasn't strange enough already after taking a sip from his tea the Lan Sect Leader, while smiling his usual one directed a question at them that Jin Ling ended up being faster to reply to.

,,Where are Wangji and the others?"

,,They got caught up outside, I'm not really sure why."

Bowing his head slightly, even though they all felt irritated because of it - which was more or less visibly written all over their faces - the Lan Sects older Jade then excused himself and disappeared.. Would they even manage still to all sit down together that day?

Well, it slightly seemed like it for a short amount of time as not long after Xichen vanished Sizhui turned up, also bowing to Jiang Cheng before taking a seat himself. As Jingyi asked where the others were though he could do nothing more than shrug and say they needed to talk about something "apparently".

It was unclear how much time passed without the others returning. The trio was rather silent, at least until Jingyi spoke up - who wasn't quite in the mood to mess around again with "Bianhua Shengshou".. just that he didn't quite get the reaction he wanted to at first.

,,Shouldn't someone go and look for them? If they stay much longer the food will get cold.."

,,If you miss them so much why don't you go and look for them yourself?"

Sizhui and Jin Ling had to hold back a chuckle, it was so noticeable how hard their friend tried not to glare at the only senior that was around.

,,I'll go, you eat."

,,Where's the sudden motivation coming from?"

Jiang Cheng asked, understandably, as his nephew got up again before throwing his ponytail over his shoulder - Why was that boy so flashy? Oh, right.. He was the peacocks son after all.

,,Wouldn't be a bad idea for me to slowly build up better relations with the important people.."

All the youngest ones uncle did was nod, he felt pleased but more so proud.. even though he didn't say it out loud. Not that any of the three that remained in the dining hall doubted that Jin Ling maybe just needed a few minutes to himself as well after the scene between Nie Huaisang and Wei Wuxian.

However.. Jin Ling didn't quite expect to hear what he did as he managed to spot most of the "Lan Folks" behind a corner. They were engaging in serious enough of a conversation to not even notice him, causing the Junior to.. eavesdrop.. not nice, but.. He was just a boy at heart really. It also took a few seconds before what he heard even made sense and had sank in as Wei Wuxian spoke first, followed from a nod from Lan Xichen, ending with Wen Ning throwing in what then caused Jin Ling to feel both complicated and somewhat sick deep down.

,,So Jiang Cheng knows.."

,,It's not surprising.. He has seen A-Yuan when we were still living together.."

,,Is he a threat?"

The next thing that followed was Wei Ying and Xichen both addressing the younger Lan almost in a hurry and shushing manner, one calling out "Lan Zhan" - the other "A-Zhan", probably the first time in many years that the Lan Sect Leader spoke to his brother like that.

,,He has been aware for years and hasn't made a move. Even yesterday as he accidentally connected the dots of Sizhui's true heritage in relation to an actual confirmation of his guesses he reacted calmly. Other than what even I thought the only matter Sect Leader Jiang has in mind is the happiness of his nephew and that young master Jin has a bond like that with at least two people around his age."

,,We don't like each other, we both know that.. but young master Rulan and A-Yuan are for us both all that there is left of our families.."

Xichen nodded in agreement, a reassuring type of expression on his face while at the end Wei Wuxian also nodded in a way that made it clear he understood, agreed and that was it. Only the younger Jade's expression seemed complicated, yet all Jin Ling wanted to do right there and then was get away.

To this time everyone else's surprise Jin Ling didn't turn up again for the meal. It didn't take the seniors all that long either to connect the dots, even though Jiang Cheng mostly gathered something.. and more or less what had gone wrong with the glances Xichen, Wangji and Wei Wuxian exchanged once they had gathered around the table. When Jingyi and Sizhui had finished their meal, they got up and excused themselves.. even if it was mostly due to worry for their missing friend and the odd behaviour that seemed to be the red string of fate that day.

,,Where is Jin Ling."

Regardless of it being a question, the way the Jiang Sect Leader said it out loud made it sound very much like anything but a question. There was this hint in his tone that also gave away that his little rage problem was starting to well up inside him - not that anyone could blame him, nor did any of the other 4 fail to understand that Jiang Cheng was worried.. in a Jiang Cheng way.

,,Let-"

,,Young Master Wei, if you would let me explain.."

At the point where Lan Xichen interrupted his former sworn brother's try to do so in his stead Jiang Cheng was really about to just get up and destroy most of the Nie Sect in order to find his missing brat. It didn't sound well and even if Wei Wuxian thought at the time that Xichen interrupted him because of the private issues he had with the raging ball of lightning.. Jiang Cheng knew his "part time lover" was trying to play on their little secret or how they "felt" for one another.

,,When I excused myself I went out to the others, because the matter of yesterday is something they should be aware of-"


	174. A conversation that's long overdue | 2

Xichen didn't even manage to fully explain as in the middle of his sentence there was yelling already coming from outside. It was clearly Jin Ling against someone, only his tone was strange.. not even really mad in sound, more agitated as if he wasn't getting listened to and misunderstood.

,,That isn't even what I was getting at.."

Then a short break where they couldn't hear anything followed from Jin Ling saying something else in the same just a little louder tone - as if he was calling after someone who was in the process of walking, or running, away.

,,Why would I care?!.... Yeh, great, just run away.."

Before the Seniors were even up and out of the dining hall Jin Ling had already walked inside. He looked distressed, one hand clutching onto the handle of his father’s sword while the other was placed on the back of his neck. After pacing around for a moment though the youngest of the Juniors went back out, again almost in a hurry. Exchanging an equally as confused as alert look, at that point the seniors also got up almost at the same time before heading out of the dining hall where Jin Ling was walking back and forth, to and from the door that would lead into a more secluded part of the garden.

For once none of the senior’s really knew what to do, there was nothing to really step in on while at the same time it seemed to be necessary. Who should even go to whom, it was just such a mess.. At the end Wei Wuxian held Jiang Cheng back who was about to walk up to “their” nephew, getting a glare thrown at him yet all the former Patriarch did was slowly shake his head.. An unspoken, yet loud “Wait” kind of gesture.

,,Well done, A-Ling, well done.”

Jin Ling who hadn’t come back out from a hidden part of the floor he was pacing around on froze, just like the Seniors. One of the main reasons why especially the “Lan’s” had decided to wait was because Jingyi was gone and Sizhui as well - it wasn’t hard to make out who was with whom, but.. the way Jingyi spoke as he slowly seemed to walk into the direction the youngest was standing at was.. anything but calming, he sounded a little bitter, more than anything sarcastic and a tad disgusted as well. It was shocking, sure.. he didn’t always have the best or most Lan of behaviours and character but..

,,I really don’t need your shit right now, A-Yi.”

,,Because you’re such a poor boy.. I almost forgot.”

It only grew harder and harder to hold Jiang Cheng back at this point, he hadn’t even taken note of the gesture Jingyi had made at them as he closed the gap between himself and Jin Ling - disappearing in the same blind angle.

,,He told us to stay put, let’s trust A-Yi for now.”

Xichen whispered - in the heat of the moment none of the others took in how he had even ended up beside the Jiang Sect Leader nor that he reassuringly and briefly took the others hand in his, giving it a little squeeze. It wasn’t even a lie, probably when Jin Ling wasn’t looking yet Jingyi was visible still he had lifted his hand into their direction,.. Not that the Seniors weren’t worried and rather wary at this point because everything did give away quite noticeably that the situation would lead to some sort of altercation or definitely a escalation at least.

~💙~

What the seniors weren’t able to see was the warning death glare Jin Ling directed at his friend - a glare so eerily similar to that of his maternal uncle.

,,What is your problem now? You heard that I simply and nicely asked him a question - it’s not my damn fault that he didn’t fucking listen, jumped to conclusions all on his own and ran off crying while believing shit no one ever told him.”

Jiang Cheng tensed briefly, the seniors has all concentrated to hear as much as their could - Wen Ning and Wei Wuxian however struggled here and there with hearing a few things.. Like the darkish, amused chuckle Jingyi had let out.

,,What my problem is? I got none.. But you are the one with the load of problems, aren't ya?"

Jin Ling didn't reply to the other, there was just this questioning silence lingering with the air growing thicker between the friends. For a second though the younger ones eyes had widened before he managed to fix his expression - too late though because Jingyi had already narrowed his eyes.

,,You don't seem to understand.. So let me explain..-"

Jingyi started, his tone strangely dark as well - matching his expression, yet his was by far not as threatening and his eyes really not full of as much of a killing intent and rage as Jin Ling's when it made click.

,,-..I wonder if I'll ever have one thing or just an hour in my life where I'll have something I actually want.. Not something I'm forced to have from birth, or forced to do, or forced to want.. A tiny bit of freedom for myself.."

,,You eavesdropped?!"

,,..I honestly woke up a few times and I actually questioned what on earth I was doing.. Looking back now, I think even though I didn't have a clue about what I was trying to get it was… always something between trying to prove myself and trying to be free.. I can't even recall how many times I ran away, simply because if I did as told or went out with allowance I'd always be supervised because I am nothing but the future sect leader that has to this and that.. Pathetic, I know.."

The older one of the duo simply continued.. By then the seniors, especially Jiang Cheng and Wei Ying weren't quite able to believe their own ears but even more so drown out the guilt they were feeling - Jiang Cheng especially. However, Lan Xichen and Wen Ning were also throwing glances at the former sworn brothers.

,,Are you done?"

,,No.. Not quite.. I have all the luxury on earth, yet I don't have the luxury of living.."

While Jin Ling was at the point already gritting his teeth, the pain from his hand that he had clenched far too tightly around the handle of his dads sword not even sinking in to his mind anymore. The only thing that made all of that that tad worse was the deprecating laugh Jingyi let out.

,,For a Lan you really don't know when to shut up."

Another chuckle of the same kind from seconds ago was the start of Jingyi's next.. "asshole move".

,,Wait.. There was something as well.. Ah! I remember: As hard as I try to find an answer, as hard as I have tried over the past one and a half years.. there's a voice inside of me, that tells me not to go into that direction.. to stop trying to find something for nothing, only to find more suffering than I'm already enduring daily.. I feel this heavy weight on my chest, almost as if I have chains around me I'm unaware of whenever I try to even think of finding something I want for myself.. Even a wife.. I always end up thinking that I shouldn't - or that I should choose from those that were already selected to fit my sects sake to still look into them and try to find the best option.."

There was a bit of movement audible, one taking a few steps towards the other - the other a few steps back and away from Jin Ling.


	175. A conversation that's long overdue | 3

,,Who on earth do you even think you are?!"

,,I? Oh, other than you, I know perfectly fine who I am."

,,Go and die."

,,That's your biggest problem isn't it?"

There was another pause in the Juniors.. "conversation". The air in the two hallways was by then so full of tension from all sides that it was more than likely possible to cut it.

,,The fuck are you talking about?"

,,The "fuck" I'm talking about is that you don't actually have an issue with Senior Wei. You don't even have a problem with Senior Wen. Or with your uncle."

While the Juniors couldn't see the expressions of their elders distort into confusion and faint hints of shock and thinking - The seniors in turn couldn't see why Jingyi ended up pausing, his friends expression had dropped. There was no sign of the glare left, the way Jin Ling looked now was.. almost scared, no.. not almost, he was dead afraid.

,,You have a lot of issues.. But you're struggling the most with truly believing you're worth what you have, or even what you're supposed to still earn.. You don't have an actual problem with anyone but yourself and your parents."

,,Not. Your. Fucking. Business."

Was all Jin Ling pressed out between gritted teeth as silence had spread between them again for several seconds. It was completely idiotic yet, just like his maternal uncle, he couldn't help but get mad instead of actually emotional.. because more than anything he was so damn mad at himself for thinking the way Jingyi was heading to with his speech.

,,Ya know, A-Ling.. Hating your parents for a fact that might be partially true that is still, at least when it comes to your father, nothing but an assumption… That's not the solution. At the end of the day you're still nothing but a damn cry-baby, mistress that can't deal with the sadness in any other way than rage and hate. I've spend so much time alone in our sects library pavillion, copying rules; I've had a lot of time to think and even more time to take a look at all the scrolls we have. I know what you're thinking, it's-"

,,Shut the fuck up!"

Jingyi had within his last couple of sentences arrived in the field of vision of the seniors, he wasn't looking at them though.. and even less did Jin Ling as within a second he had already grabbed his friend by the collar and pushed him against the wall. Their height difference wasn't overly significant.. yet really, when it came to having an impact with raging, yelling and so forth no one could outdo the Jiang Sect; and pretty much everyone knew at this point Jin Ling had gotten more of that side of his family tree.

,,What you're thinking.. No, what you actually can't help but believe deep down is that not a freaking single person actually loves you. You think that your parents rather died trying to save a maniac that had nothing to do with them. Your mother rather tried to save him than stay with you, her already half-orphaned child - and as if that isn't terrible enough she even died trying to reassure and save the person that was beyond being able to get saved at this point. You think you're nothing but a painful remembrance to your uncle of all of that… And you think that your other uncle.. only used you as a toy… trying to keep the sect to himself… for as long as he could.. You think he.. hated you, 'cause you're the son of… the nephew of…"

The scene that played out in front of the seniors was horrible to watch for them - especially for Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian. It was hard as anything for all of them though to not interfere, yet shortly before the situation finally escalated Jingyi had given them a last "Leave it" sign when Jin Ling was already too close to snapping to take note of it.

The reason why it grew harder and harder and ultimately impossible for Jingyi to both speak and breath was because somewhere during the last portion of his speech the younger one had thrown him on the ground - Only to get on top of him, wrap his hands around his neck and apply pressure.

During all of that as Jingyi "finally" grew silent, there was a brief moment where Jiang Cheng couldn't help but glance at his former sworn brother.. Who also seemed to have a rather hard time not touching his neck, as they both could recall easily how shockingly similar the situation was to their own all those years back. However just as the younger sect leader opened his mouth to yell at his nephew, Jin Ling already pulled his hands away.

Instinctively the older one of the friends reached up to his neck with one of his hands, having a bit of a coughing fit that.. as weird as it may sound, reassured all of their seniors, because at least he was still alive. The calm however always came before a storm - or in this case the reassurance before the confusion as Jingyi then spoke up, his tone hoarse and voice quite torn in general.

,,Feeling better now?"

It took some seconds yet once it really sank in what he had just done, and what Jingyi had done, Jin Ling needed to get away; preferably from himself, which wasn't possible. Getting up from his friend, the youngest quite literally ran away, or.. he walked rather fast, head down, pale as anything.. With the hand that was usually holding onto his dad's sword lifted up, chewing on one of his fingertips more than nail even to refrain from falling into his usual habit.

At this point three of the seniors began to move already, the Lan's going to their injured, still coughing and raggedly breathing, disciple while Wen Ning headed into the direction Sizhui must've disappeared to quite a while ago by then. The only two that were left were Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng, who Jin Ling tried to pass by right through the middle as they were standing side by side - oddly enough. Jiang Cheng also let his nephew pass, yet just as Jin Ling was a foot behind him he turned and spoke up - his tone serious, naturally mad while Wei Wuxian turned as well.

,,We need to talk."

,,You two are the last people I want to hear anything about conversations from! Or anything at all about behaviour, bonds, NOTHING!"

Jin Ling did both turning back around to and snapping at them so fast while lifting his hand in a warning manner almost - shouting loud enough for the 3 Lans to hear and look over, even the youngest ones tone wasn't quite nice. It happened so out of nowhere while at the same time being so understandable that neither of his "uncles" could do much but avoid Jin Ling's upset, teary eyed stare that went back and forth between them..

As other than what he had hoped for neither came up to him to hug, or at least slap him Jin Ling then dropped his hand before shaking his head and disappearing back into the dining hall that was at this point pretty much empty and cleaned up.

For a few moments the former sworn brothers stood side by side in silence, Wei Ying was glancing at Jiang Cheng who in turn stared at his hands - of which one of them was playing with Zidian that rested on his other. The Lan's were at the time going back and forth between glancing at them and tending to Jingyi.. Yet surprisingly enough Wei Wuxian was the first to speak up in a low yet for his standards rather mature tone of voice.

,,No matter how torn our former relationship is and how much bad blood there may still be between us-"

,,I know, Jin Ling comes first. Not like it was my choice anyway.. Forget it, let's give this brat a few minutes."

The only one of the 5 that remained in the hallways that wasn't confused about the sentence the Jiang Sect Leader started but broke off halfway through was Xichen. Regardless of how trapped in his own breakdown he had been years back in the temple of nightmares and secrets, or how much his uncle tried to pressure him, the older Jade had briefly taken note of how Jiang Cheng stood there - As well as how Jin Ling tried to poke at something. Not that he heard much but the younger leaders nephew say or ask something along the lines of "Are you sure it's alright?".. but what really went on at the time was something neither Lan Xichen or Jin Ling managed to understand.


	176. A conversation that's long overdue | 4

Jin Ling felt like shit. Once he had made his way into the dining hall he.. sat down on one of the tables, arms resting on his thighs staring at his hands that were shaking like mad. He was shocked about how far he had escalated without even realising quite a few things.. One of those was for example that Jingyi hadn't once fought back against him, a clear sign for the true intentions his friend had.

The trip was really nothing but a constant up and down for the youngest.. But right now he really didn't know how to go on. He knew he had to apologise, at least to Jingyi and the Lan Jades for sure.. When it came to the others.. maybe he should be the bigger person even if he wasn't in the wrong.. but honestly, he was quite afraid of facing his maternal uncle especially and even more so of possibly hearing quite a few things he really didn't want to have confirmed regardless of already believing in his guesses.

In the meantime where Jin Ling ran things through his head in all directions possible things proceeded or happened outside as well.

After standing there with Wei Wuxian staring up at his former family member all confused about the statement that Jiang Cheng never finished the latter had turned and walked towards the 3 Lan's. Jiang Cheng's expression was hard to read as he - like always - only directed his attention and speech at Lan Xichen.

,,How is he?"

,,I'm alive, ya know. I can talk as well even if I sound like shit right now."

,,A-Yi, watch your language and apart from that even if you're able to talk you should give your vocal cords and neck in general a bit of rest."

It was still weird for Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian to hear Xichen use a scolding and serious tone, it just sounded so wrong to them.. yet the younger leader couldn't help but huff out a short "are you serious" type of laugh, that boy truly had guts no matter how deeply Xichen sighed because of it.

,,If he's able to still talk like that to a sect leader Jin Ling didn't tighten his grip enough."

There was a part inside the Lan Sect Leader that couldn't deny the truth behind the statement, as horrible as it was - the younger Jade though that was on anything but good terms with the one dressed in purple glared at the latter. The next to speak up was Wei Ying, followed from a "I got it" kind of nod from Xichen before Jiang Cheng asked what they all wanted to understand at this point without feeling like it was the right moment just yet.

,,The bruises will get the worst in around 3 days, we'll need to come up with a medicine against them and apply it regularly."

,,What were you even thinking, you brat?"

,,This might be a surprise but.. for once, I was actually thinking."

Jingyi said in between of heavy breaths that hurt in his throat as in the midst of it his seniors helped him up, supporting him on both sides.. Yet that much they had gathered already and it caused the Jiang Sect Leader to roll his eyes while pointing that out as well in a matching tone.

,,We got that much ourselves as well."

,,Let me at least have my moment, alright?"

The young one replied while rolling his eyes as well, he and Jiang Cheng really were such a combination.

,,A lot happened the last few nights.. Sizhui and I have noticed that there's a lot.. going on, or wrong, inside A-Ling.. but he's not the type to talk, seems like a general family problem that runs in the genes.."

,,A-Yi."

Xichen scolded again, his tone sharper this time as even though only briefly Jiang Cheng glared at the junior for poking at their flaw. Letting out a heavy and shaky breath while reaching back up to his throat Jingyi then continued.

,,It's the truth, A-Ling has only asked A-Yuan a question.. quite calmly for the topic that was brought up as well yet A-Yuan instantly snapped and accused A-Ling of a lot of stuff.. Honestly I don't really know what's going on there but well.."

,,Are you going to get to the point still?"

,,Sect Leader Jiang, let him explain properly, I believe there is a reason for the way he goes about explaining."

For the first time in quite a while the Lan Sects older Jade spoke up in a tone that was more like him, calming, gentle - not that anyone understood why he snapped back so suddenly or how it was possible for it to work almost instantly on the grumpy purple ball of lightning.

,,How about we sit down and listen to what he has to say?"

Regardless of the displeasure being visible on the Jiang Sect Leaders face, he couldn't deny that he was being an asshole and really.. the Lan brat deserved at least that much for what his nephew had just done to him - nodding, even with gritted teeth, at the end the group of 5 went to the side of the hallway and sat down in a circle around Jingyi.

,,After A-Yuan ran away I followed him, he was just pacing around crying saying that he was scared and actually just crying because he acted like that for nothing. I mean.. I kind of get both sides but.."

,,Yesterday.. Sect Leader Jiang heard young master Jin call out for Sizhui with his given name.. He connected the dots and I suppose that earlier he heard the conversation between us where we discussed the matter."

,,Yeh but honestly A-Yuan was only a child back then, I'm not fully able to grasp the intention Jin Ling had.."

,,We are all aware that it would be pointless to hold someone who was a child at the time responsible for his heritage."

It surprised all others that Jiang Cheng of all people said what he just did, the tension audible in his voice yet for once more than anything that he was actually serious.

,,Anyway, A-Yuan told me that he's afraid that after A-Ling just opened up to him last night a bit at least he would completely close himself off now again.."

,,Don't tell me that that's the reason why you let yourself almost get killed.."

For the first time in quite a while Wei Wuxian spoke up.. He was a risk loving person when it meant helping others but that was.. Of course Jingyi had to confirm the guess with a hesitant shrug that caused Xichen to sigh once again.

,,A-Ling and I aren't really the closest, our characters don't match up and no matter the topic or how we try to talk it gets out of control each time so.."

,,But you clearly noticed us relatively soon."

Wei Ying pointed out and the only reaction from the youngest was a nod - a hesitant one that came a few seconds late without him looking at either of the 4 seniors.

,,All I said were assumptions.. I'm aware that I've gone too far and I apologise for being rude towards your family, Sect Leader Jiang, but.. At this point, if everything would lead to an actual falling out between those two there might not be another chance for anyone to get to know."

,,Why didn't that brat just come to me though.."

,,He's scared."

Jiang Cheng who had more or less forced a break in the Juniors speech sounded quite frankly overwhelmed.. He was just in the process of running his hand over his face as Jingyi spoke up which in turn caused the younger Leaders motion to come to a hold. As Jiang Cheng pulled his hand away his expression looked like he had bitten on the most sour of fruits that someone had given him as a prank yet.. he wasn't actually mad, it was just.. his face. He was confused, irritated and maybe a little hurt.

,,What's he supposed to be afraid of?"

,,You threaten him almost daily with breaking his legs A-.."

The "Cheng" remained stuck in Wei Ying's throat, he even covered his mouth with his hand once he realised that it was anything but appropriate to talk to Jiang Cheng in such a familiar manner. Yet regardless of briefly tensing and gritting his teeth the purple ball of lightning only sounded a little arrogant and bitter once he spoke up himself.

,,I've never laid a finger on that child, I'm not my mother."


	177. A conversation that's long overdue | 5

It was so silent in an instant once Jiang Cheng had made that statement that one would likely be able to hear a pin drop. No one even dared to breath, for that though no one was able to keep a straight face either. The huge variety of expressions included: Xichen's jaw minimally dropping, it wasn't the first time that it was quite hard for him to not stare at his secret affair in a wrong way - he looked shocked, not that he hadn't gathered that several things hadn't run right in the Jiang Household but.. What did this include and exclude? Jiang Cheng himself couldn't hide that it was definitely a slip of tongue, a moment where his mouth was quicker than his brain yet he fixed his expression rather quick. Wei Wuxian however looked.. uncomfortable, shocked as well but more as if he recalled something - which was the case. Lan Wangji's reaction was for him rather severe as well, he didn't take the breath he tried to suck into his lungs entirely and if one would look closely enough the person would've been able to see his eyes briefly narrowing. The one that couldn't keep anything to himself though was Jingyi, his face distorted from "Holy shit" to a lot of other similar expressions.

,,Eh.. Ahem.. Anyway.. I don't really know, first of all I'm not a future sect leader and all of that.. Sure, I'm not unworthy or unimportant but I'm not the type that you all are so.."

The youngest was the first to break the silence, rather awkwardly and while running his hand over his neck but he did - before ending it with an awkward chuckle that wasn't the best idea with the state his throat was currently in.

The four adults however looked as if they each were thinking of something in their own way - as if they understood something he couldn't pick up on, which Jingyi knew.. yet ultimately Xichen had to interfere because.. that wasn't the way to think and live really.

,,While it may be unlikely for you to turn into the sect leader of Gusu Lan you cannot know now how your future may turn out. You can decide to form your own sect, marry a maiden of another sect and turn into their leader depending on her position. You should refrain from taking life too easily and neglecting your studies based on an assumption."

All Jingyi could do was smile an awkward one, already regretting having made that statement that to some extent still held truth in it.

,,Even though I don't know what it's like in his position.. We all know since years that all the risky things he does are to earn recognition.. So far that he completely forgets about himself in the process and thinks he can't be himself unless he does whatever is expected of him."

Jiang Cheng held back the urge to ask who the hell Jin Ling would need or crave said recognition from. There were many, far too many things growing far too painfully clear for the Jiang Sect Leader at this point in time as his mind was constantly working and running through everything many times over.

None of the other three adults needed to ask either.. Apart from Wangji they had all gathered their fair share of how the Jiang Household had run and how Jiang Cheng had turned out.. Adding 1+1 together wasn't the hardest of tasks.

Just like for his nephew the trip was also a constant emotional rollercoaster ride for Jiang Cheng. Up's and Down's from the first day on - right now the second time he felt like either drowning himself in alcohol, or hiding somewhere.. Hell, with how he screwed up in so many ways without actually taking much note of it even dying didn't sound like one of the worst options.

Before they were able to talk about anything further Wen Ning popped up beside them, standing there even with his unchanging expression in a rather awkward manner over all.. It didn't help that everyone's attention was on him, eyes and ears included.

,,Is he alright?"

Wei Ying was the first to speak up, like most of the time when something had to he discussed with the General. Nodding once stiffly, Wen Ning then explained a few bits himself.

,,A-Yuan didn't mean for everything to escalate like that.. He got scared when his heritage got brought up.. but he's more afraid of young master Jin not opening up to him anymore.."

,,Those boys.. Reacting like that isn't going to make it better.."

,,I don't really think that A-Ling's issue was A-Yuan's heritage.. more the fact that he knows but kept it to himself,.. I mean.. after everything I heard through rumours it's not surprising that the mistress stops trusting and so forth easily.. or gets mad fast."

It probably wasn't on purpose but on more than one occasions since all of the discussions started both Xichen and Wanyin felt.. personally addressed or like right now more attacked.

,,He only remembers his past since a few years again himself. When Wangji found him the boy wasn't in a good condition, he was clueless about his own roots for more than 10 years."

Xichen added in, making even Jiang Cheng hesitate because even if he had found the toddler annoying as hell.. and the toddler had been a Wen as well, he had seen him "happy", the kid had even clung to his leg aching for his acceptance.. Great, another kid that he had let down. Either way, they all grew silent for a bit before Wen Ning said he would go back outside, to which Jingyi joined in, Wangji as well a few seconds later - even though hesitantly because of the combination of his husband and the Jiang Sect Leader.

,,Sect Leader Jiang, I will jump outside for a second as well just to get Sizhui's side of the story but I think.. We should go inside and clean up after our own mess together."

Wei Wuxian said.. it felt for neither of them less strange and wrong how he had to call his former sworn brother who had gotten up from the ground just like Xichen by then. Even while glaring, Jiang Cheng still gave it a brief nod before turning away.. and for a few seconds Wei Ying stood there, staring at the others back with his expression full of sadness, guilt and conflict before he ultimately disappeared. The Lan Sect Leader had rarely to never seen his brother-in-law like that.


	178. A conversation that's long overdue | 6

,,Sect Leader Jiang?”

Once it seemed and sounded like there was no one left around him Xichen turned to the one he just addressed, his tone a little more “careful” than usually in comparison how he always treated Wanyin.. The latter, however, was completely unresponsive to that as well as the Jade’s next try to get him to snap out of his clear daze.

,,Wanyin?”

After hesitating for a few seconds the taller male let out a heavy breath, not even looking around as he took the two steps he needed to take forward to close the gap between them. It was risky and probably dumb in more than one way yet Xichen couldn’t hold back the urge to comfort the other somehow.. Which he did, wrapping one of his arms around the younger leaders waist, the Jade brought his other hand up the his lovers head to make Wanyin rest it against him. Even though Wanyin tensed for a brief moment, he neither pulled away nor reacted much apart from that - not like Xichen didn’t understand or minded it.

,,A-Cheng,.. It’s going to be alright.. But if you need help, or advice, you have to tell me at times..”

The only response that came from the younger one this time was that he leaned his weight a little more against the other.. What was he supposed to say? He was actually struggling so hard with his emotions that if he would try to talk or even just look into those eyes that he knew were full of worry, gentleness and all the emotions he especially thought he wasn’t deserving of right then and there.. Wanyin was self-aware enough to know that if he would do anything wrong the Junior’s wouldn’t be the only ones with a breakdown. It was his fault, most of it anyway, wasn’t it?

Honestly, for Xichen even the little bit of leaning was reassuring enough while at the same time being more of a worrying gesture. At this rate he could barely guess how the Jiang Household was, highly likely in truth not that different from his own sect where.. well, emotional support wasn’t the biggest strength. At the end he started to hum a little calming melody.. For a while, before he gently lifted the others head, not caring much about their positions anymore as Wanyin tried to avoid the eye contact. What was even wrong or right at this point? Xichen had lost all of his past answers to that. He had made the mistake more than once already.. the mistake of ignoring the emotions of those he was closest to, which ultimately lead to the demise of them all - at least partially. He wasn’t going to make the same mistake again and so, ignoring everything, he leaned in and gently, lightly pressed his lips against the younger males. It took a bit, yet sooner or later the Jiang Sect Leader gave in as well, before they parted and he more or less rested his head back against the Jade’s shoulder.

,,What am I supposed to tell him..?”

The taller ones eyes widened for a second, his hand that was stroking over his lovers back also momentarily coming to a standstill - He hadn’t quite expected for the other to actually say anything, regardless of it being audible that he likely spoke to or with himself.

,,Jin Ling?”

Surprisingly enough the Jiang Sect Leader nodded.. shortly followed from him speaking up more in a tone that sounded hoarse, clearly trying to keep himself together.

,,I’ve ran it through my head so many times by now.. But I can’t lie to him.. I know why his father made the choice he made.. that it wasn’t for Wei Wuxian’s sake.. His mother however.. Even I, as much as I hate myself for saying that, thinking like that… I also can’t forgive her for putting Wei Wuxian before her own son.. It’s a curse in our sect..”

,,A curse..?”

Xichen asked, more carefully than he had ever even asked anyone anything. He was hyper aware of the fact that one wrong word, movement or a tad too much of pushing and the younger one of them would shut himself off again.

,,Always putting matters that are beyond saving or not even real before the children…”

Honestly, all the Lan Sect Leader wanted to do at this point was sit down and pull the other on his lap, never letting him go again.. all he did do was subconsciously tightening the hold on him as he let a few moments pass to think properly before saying what he did next.

,,No matter the decisions you make, A-Cheng, there will always come good and bad with it - no matter how right your choice might even appear to be. When I decided to fight against Wei Wuxian, I believed it was the right thing to do - even though I knew of how my brother felt.. I ultimately gained nothing good, almost lost A-Zhan once he got to know.. All we can do is be honest, even if that may mean that you’re hurting someone in the process.. And we can change, just as much as we are able to bring change towards anything we want to… You are capable of that, remember the promise you made with yourself that is the reason for you keeping that scar.”

It was the first time in forever that Wanyin ended up looking at his lover who had once again lifted his head up, stroking gently over the wound that was already now in the final stages of healing. The Jiang Sect Leader was like always greeted by the Jade’s gentle and comfortingly warm gaze, as well as a smile to match.. and for a few seconds he couldn’t really help that he stared, aching to drown in it all and run.. Yet it wasn’t the right time, and maybe the time, the right time for them would never come.. and so he pulled away while nodding and letting out a heavy, long and shaky breath.

What they hadn’t been aware of, or taken note off, was that somewhere during their moment Jingyi had been send back inside to see whether or not Wanyin had already gone to his nephew - And wow, did the young mans eyes widen in equally as much surprise as satisfaction when he saw them like that. It was quite hard for the prankster to stay silent and not blow his cover or ruin the scene somehow, yet at the end he covered his mouth with his hand and took a few seconds to himself to not laugh before going back outside.. to report only on what was necessary for the time being.


	179. A conversation that's long overdue | 7

Not all that much had happened outside in the meantime of everything proceeding how it did inside the Nie Sect.

When Wen Ning initially went out to talk to Sizhui, the latter only began to sob more once he noticed his relative. The task outside was really to mostly reassure and calm the young man down more than anything.. However, Wen Ning still had to ask a few things and he both knew and did so once his nephew was in a condition that allowed it.

,,What happened..?"

,,I.. I don't even really know.."

Since Wen Ning couldn't sigh all he did was sit down in front of his nephew, placing one of his hands reassuringly on the Juniors leg.

,,When I left the dining hall with A-Yi to search for A-Ling.. he was already standing there, waiting, behind a corner. Before we could even really say anything he asked me "When did you feel like telling me, or us, who you really are".."

As far as the young one had just calmed down, already now he let out another quite heart wrenching sob while hiding his face instinctively behind his hands. Only a few seconds later did Wen Ning reach out to at least pull them away and take them in his own - His nephew was one of the few people the General dared to actually touch out of his own accord in such a, or similar manners.

,,I panicked.. I said a lot of idiotic things while jumping to conclusions before I ran away because of that.. And we just managed to get him to open up a little the last few days, especially last night.."

,,What did you say, A-Yuan?"

Ignoring the slight blush spreading over the smaller ones face once he realised and recalled the happenings of the night Wen Ning just.. kept the conversation going for both of their sakes and comfort.

,,I.. I just completely snapped.. I don't even really remember but I said something like "Because I'm a Wen?" as if I wasn't the one accusing A-Ling of things and he tried to talk some sense into me-"

,,When young master yelled that that wasn't what he meant?"

Wen Ning threw in and Sizhui nodded, it was so clear how bad he felt for it all regardless of it being understandable as well.

,,I get that not telling them.. that it's upsetting for them, I've hurt their trust and I.. Yes, I was scared that A-Ling would hate me for my heritage, but I know better.. but still I.. I didn't mean it but now with it all combining.. what if it's too late.."

,,Young master Rulan.. he's stronger than that, you both are.. You need to apologise and explain yourself regardless.. a lot more happened by now.."

Well the sobbing and slight breakdown didn't get much better as his uncle explained what had happened between Jingyi and Jin Ling, without too much detail. Once Sizhui had calmed down a little his uncle had went back inside to give a status report.

~💙~

Later on when everyone but Jin Ling, Jiang Cheng and Lan Xichen gathered around Sizhui outside.. The adults exchanged quite a few glances because of the way the Juniors were touching, looking and talking to one another. It wasn't.. the most common to touch someone's injured and exposed neck the way Sizhui went about doing it, neither of them seemingly having a problem with staring at one another while having such gentle but more so direct skin contact.

They really weren't the best at hiding what had happened between them even though all Lan Zhan and Wei Ying did at this point was guess - other than Wen Ning who had witnessed the start of the former night unfold. For quite a while mostly everything went on between the Juniors with Sizhui asking and saying a few panicked things because of his friends injury and Jingyi reassuring him that it was nothing.. just the typical.. lovers type of behaviour..? No, they had to be imagining things..

,,You should go."

Lan Zhan said after a while, they had somehow managed at this point to calm Sizhui down enough that he was just occasionally sobbing still and.. Well, as little as both Wen Ning and the younger Jade liked the idea of Jiang Cheng and Wei Ying doing anything together.. sometimes you have to accept the reality of things.. And the reality was that they had been family once, just like the current problem was one only they could somehow deal with or fix together.

However, the former Patriarch was also rather hesitant about going back inside.. The confrontation wasn't going to end well, not that Wei Ying was one for such conversations anyway but.. Just like Jiang Cheng he also didn't quite know what on earth he was supposed to say really.

Either way, a minute or two after Lan Zhan had spoken up the smaller one of the husbands leaned up, gave him a quick peck on the lips and went back inside.. Where he found his former sworn brother and brother-in-law standing side by side in complete silence.. How welcoming and comforting. If Wei Wuxian wouldn't have felt so awkward, due to obvious reasons, he may have taken note of how the air around them was anything but tense and uncomfortable.

,,Shall we try to talk to him now?"

,,What did the kid say?"

Ouch, it still stand each time Wanyin instantly snapped at him in a pissed off tone - Wei Wuxian couldn't know that it was hell for the (technically) younger one of them as well. The Jiang Sect Leader didn't want to act like that, not really but.. It probably wasn't their time yet. After staring up at Jiang Cheng for a brief moment the former Patriarch then looked down, running his hand over his chin as he briefly explained.

,,It's as Wen Ning said, Sizhui didn't mean it. He panicked, said a few crappy things and all of that pretty much because he thought everything would go downhill now."

Jiang Cheng nodded, his expression not giving away that he wasn't surprised yet believing what he had heard twice now for the time being.

,,If you need the help of an outsider at any point feel free to call for me. I will wait somewhere in the dining hall and depending on how everything will develope I might call the others inside as well."

For once both of the former sworn brothers wore the same confused, irritated like expression once Xichen had finished his speech - which prompted him to smile as well as explain some further.

,,I had a small private discussion with young master Jin the other day. He rather quickly walked off though once he had heard what he wanted."

Gritting his teeth the younger sect leader gave it a simple nod, biting back the urge to ask what the other had done.

,,For now, I think what we need is both liquor and luck."

Was all Wei Wuxian in turn replied before heading towards the door of the dining hall that was still open.. Wanyin followed a step behind him and one thing was for sure: Liquor, they had already - in mass.. and Jin Ling seemed to have indulged in it already the past half an hour or some more. After taking and letting out the heaviest of breaths the young ones uncles than stepped inside - Were they ready? Anything but, yet they'd never be.


	180. A conversation that's long overdue | 8

,,We're not here to murder you."

Jiang Cheng said in a rather calm tone for his standards once he and Wei Ying had approached "their" nephew and the latter seemed ready to run. Out of reflex the former Patriarch nudged the other in the side with his elbow as Jin Ling in turn sank back down on the table - not looking at his "uncles" at all that after Wanyin glared at Wei Wuxian sat down on either side of the youngest.

,,.. So.. What happened?"

The smallest of the round asked after a while, his tone for his standards rather serious yet calm. None of them felt any less awkward and tense, so it seemed like the best option to first go about asking the youngest about his side to the story.. Which surprised Jin Ling enough to actually look up for a brief second.

,,I tried to look for you all when you didn't turn up for the meal.. Then I ended up hearing what Senior Wen said and.."

,,You connected the dots."

Jin Ling nodded, slowly and hesitantly but he did as Wei Wuxian had taken in that it was still.. a little hard for his "nephew" to get out that part of the story. A moment later, however, Jiang Cheng spoke up in a not so pleased tone - not that anyone had ever heard him sound overly pleased, really.

,,What did that guy say?"

,,.. That-"

Both Jin Ling and Wei Ying had began to talk at the same time, causing them both to stop and the older one of the duo to lift his hand; signalising the teen that he may answer if he wishes to do so.

,,He said that.. A-Yuan is the last person of his family, just like.. just like I am the last of yours.. and that even if you don't like one another.."

,,All that matters is the happiness of those that are left. That's pretty much what he said."

Jiang Cheng raised his brow for a moment before giving it a simple nod. He could agree with that much at least.

,,And then?"

,,I.. I felt sick, mad,.. confused first of all.. I didn't turn back up because I had to.. come to terms with it all, I guess, yet.. I wanted to know why he didn't tell us, or if he ever planned to. I didn't think me asking that would lead to this.. this fucking mess, really."

Glancing at his former sworn brother, when Wanyin didn't seem to feel like reminding his nephew of "language" Wei Ying let out a heavy breath - taking one of the liquor jars, opened and took a sip of it before explaining in a.. rather low tone for his standards.

,,It's a long story, but.. I think you're aware that I helped the Wen's, mayhaps not of the fact that the only crime those I supported had committed was to not.. speak up, or out. A-Yuan was one of those, he was nothing more than an orphaned toddler at the time."

At that point Jiang Cheng also reached out and grabbed a jar of liquor himself. He really wasn't in the mindset of all those memories resurfacing while simultaneously.. There were a lot of questions he had never gotten an answer for, so for the time being all he did was be a sour purple ball of lighting - a silent one at that.

,,I rescued them several times.. And then I crossed the point of no return. At the end all I could do, even though I.. quite literally had lost my mind by then.. was hide him. I hid him so maybe, just maybe at least he wouldn't be just another "casualty" in a war against me.. In a war more than one person was at fault for."

,,Senior Wen.. He.. He said something similar.. That in truth they weren't innocent because they never stood up or tried to stop the happenings from happening.. But.. We, A-Yuan, Jingyi and I,.. we felt like, shouldn't everyone have stepped up sooner? Instead of pushing the blame on a single group.."

Silence broke out between them for a minute, maybe two,.. As gutted as Jiang Cheng felt, really.. thinking back, probably the damn Wen and the kids weren't even that wrong. Maybe they should've manned up sooner and who knows.. together, every sect combining the way they did after 2 got destroyed, things would've.. things definitely would've been different.

,,Either way.. A-Yuan, he couldn't remember anything until the temple incident. I've only briefly spoken to Lan Zhan about it once, yet.. when he found him, A-Yuan was.. almost dead, he had a terrible fever, was malnourished.. He forgot, and it was good that he did.. Both, Zewu-Jun and Lan Zhan went to great lengths to keep him alive regardless of his heritage.."

,,It's not like anyone would've gone after a child.."

Jin Ling threw in so sure of it that as neither of the adults was able to look him in the eye he actually went pale in the face - feeling once again how the things he had eaten and drank so far rose from his stomach into his throat.

,,There is no way to explain the depth of the hatred that was present at the time towards anyone who had the last name Wen. It did not matter if child, not even a dog or cat would've been safe."

It wasn’t all that surprising that the youngest didn’t quite know what to say. Hell, Jin Ling didn’t even know what to think. After another bit of silence Wei Wuxian then felt the need to speak up again, not that there was anything he could say that would make it all better.

,,Times were different. I think.. No matter the ill blood that may be lingering between all the seniors, we can all agree that we’re glad you youths nowadays don’t have any idea how such things are.”

,,It’s just.. I actually feel like throwing up.. Wouldn’t there have been another way? Sending them off in a remote area, new clothes, names, just anything that wouldn’t have given away who they were?”

While Jiang Cheng gritted his teeth once again, unable to believe that his nephew out of all people was talking like that - Wei Wuxian couldn’t help but chuckle before saying still in the midst of calming down.

,,We were so poor and no one helped us. It would’ve been possible, but well.. There’s nothing that will come out of thinking about that now.. Just know that A-Yuan was probably scared.”

,,Scared?”

,,That brat is scared that you’re going to hate him and so on.”

It had been so long since his uncle had said a word or even moved noticeably that now where Jiang Cheng did speak up Jin Ling flinched quite hard - which resulted in the ball of lightning to glare at him while Wei Ying snorted a laugh.

,,As if."

Jin Ling replied in quite the cocky kind of tone while.. rolling his eyes.

,,I know that, you know that, we all know that - just he doesn't. You need to tell him."

,,But. Not. Now. We're not done yet."

The first to add something was Wei Wuxian.. It was remarkable how fast the young one got up and tried to get out of the awkward setting that he knew wouldn't be that easy-going from there on.. However, Jiang Cheng stopped him just as quick in a tone that didn't leave room for even a "but" and so with a defeated look on his face Jin Ling went back to his spot and sat down.


	181. A conversation that's long overdue | 9

,,You said that he's a Wen isn't the issue, then what is?"

Jin Ling and Wei Wuxian weren't the only ones that noticed he couldn't make his actual interest overly audible, Jiang Cheng was also aware of that.

,,That he didn't trust us enough to open up. It's not making it better that he has known since so long by now."

Well, what were they supposed to do at this point? Things that should be told and everything related to that was.. quite the topic for them as well.. At the end Wei Ying spoke up regardless.

,,He should've, at some point. However, was there a right time? Is there ever a right time? It's complicated, but.. Does it truly matter? It doesn't sound like you favour being seen as only this and that as well."

,,.. That.. I guess.. I don't know.. I think we both fucked up.."

Jin Ling admitted lowly as he stared at his jar that he was clinging to with his hands.

,,Jin Ling, our world is extremely short-lived and hypocritical.. One moment you're loved, hated the next. One second you're a hero, then you're the villain and nothing good you've ever done matters still."

,,Like my uncle.."

While Jiang Cheng slightly stiffened at the mention of Jin GuangYao that had left "his boy" even more scarred than he had already been.. Wei Ying slowly nodded regardless of "their" nephew not looking at either of them.

,,Meng Yao was a prime example.. this world is always like that."

,,Then what's it worth trying to do good in the first place? If a single wrong step taken will destroy it all, why try?"

,,Because change will only come through trial and error. If everyone would stand still simply because it's more convenient, nothing good would happen in the first place."

This time both Jin Ling and Wei Wuxian were surprised that the one to break the silence was Jiang Cheng. His voice sounded serious, his expression giving away that regardless of everything and anything he truly believed in those words.

,,If we all lean back and don't strive for a better world we'll never get it. It's-"

,,Trying to make the seemingly impossible - possible."

Wei Wuxian finished his former sworn brothers sentence and while Jin Ling looked at them both all Jiang Cheng could do was take a sip from his liquor to drown out the bitterness that was still raging inside of him.

,,The Jiang Sect Motto?"

The smallest of the trio nodded, taking a sip himself before wiping his mouth with his sleeve.

,,While it is mostly known as the Jiang Sect motto, it is something more people should live by.. While keeping limits of all kind in mind.”

Hearing that, while Jin Ling could agree.. Jiang Cheng ended up chuckling, again rather bitterly - that Wei Wuxian out of all people said something like that was just.. The former Patriarch however simply ignored it and took another sip of his drink.

,,It’s all good and fine.. but how am I supposed to handle this sect.. It’s a complete mess and I don’t even know if I want to be the face of it.”

,,I mean, I'm nowhere near a Sect leader but, thinking back and all, I doubt anyone of the current or past leaders really wanted that position apart from 1 or 2.. A-.. Sect Leader Jiang, you, even Lan Qiren. I can't speak for Zewu-Jun though."

,,No, I wouldn't say so."

The Lan Sect Leader threw in with the faintest hint of awkwardness being audible. Jin Ling hadn't even noticed the Jade appear beside them with a tray full of teacups and a few snacks.

,,I.."

,,Yes?"

Like always Jin Ling was taken aback equally as much as irritated by how nice and fast the Lan Sects older Jade replied to him. And while Jiang Cheng put on his usual "for Lan Xichen only" expression that was minimally less unwelcoming than towards pretty much everyone else - Wei Wuxian.. was Wei Wuxian, already all over the snacks while drinking.

,,So.. You also didn't wish to be a leader, Zewu-Jun?"

,,I.. wouldn't necessarily say that I was unwilling. It is.. not a secret that my character is not fierce enough. However, the way I turned into the Gusu Lan Sects leader was rather similar to that of Sect Leader Jiang."

Xichen replied truth- yet carefully at the same time after thinking for a few seconds about how to word it. While neither of the adults needed to ask, that Jin Ling didn't have a clue instantly was rather visible which caused the Jade to try and speak up onto to be interrupted by the Junior in a hurry.

,,The-"

,,I understand.. I'm aware of what happened. I'm sorry."

,,There's no need to apologise."

Xichen reassured and only stayed because of how the youngest of them kept glancing from the ground at him and back.

,,Why did you debate about taking the position that was rightfully yours, Zewu-Jun?"

,,Do you wish to have an answer from me personally or from Lan Xichen, the Gusu Lan Sects older Jade?"

For a few seconds Xichen could've sworn the three in front of him were pretty much one person. Jiang Cheng furrowed his brows, Jin Ling blinked repeatedly with a question mark appearing above his head and Wei Wuxian who hadn't paid all that much attention was trying to figure things out - none of them looked any less confused as the other. After a moment, swallowing to refrain from letting out an inappropriate noise of amusement, the Lan Sect Leader added something that didn't make much better at all.

,,How about we try something?"

,,I apologise but we're trying to have a serious conversation here, Sect Leader."

Jiang Cheng threw in, not overly amused but more so clueless which.. quite frankly pissed him off. Xichen, however, only let out a soft breath.. before he simply walked off, without further explaining a thing. Only seconds after the Jade had approached a middle aged maid she called out to the other Nie Sect servants and they all left the hall rather fast - even going to the lengths of closing the door behind them.

,,We will have this hall to ourselves for the next 30 minutes. Now, to get back to what I’ve mentioned before.. How about we all get rid temporarily rid of what restrains us?”

Xichen tried it that way this time - all he got from it however were glances that made it clear the others were worried about his sanity.. Which then lead to him simply reaching to his flute, that he went on to place on the table beside them before.. reaching for his forehead ribbon and undoing that as well which prompted Jin Ling’s jaw to drop and Wei Wuxian to speak up in a panicked hurry.

,,Zewu-Jun.. Isn’t that forbidden? The Lan Sects forehead ribbon-”

,,Is a sign of self-restraint and sacred. However, it is a common misbelief that we are not allowed to take it off - what is “forbidden”, and I’m using this phrase loosely, is someone else touching it who is neither family or your other half.”

It wasn’t all that much like the Lan Sects older Jade to interrupt someone’s speech, yet he allowed himself to do so for once before looking one after the other at Jiang Cheng, Jin Ling and Wei Wuxian.. that were all still eyeing him in disbelief and hesitation.

,,I apologise, but what is the point of this, Sect Leader?”

,,The point is for us to not be whatever we are expected to be for the time being and instead ourselves, young master Jin.”

Jiang Cheng and his nephew still didn’t make a move even after Xichen tried to reassure them with his usual smile.. Wei Wuxian, however, gave in after a few more seconds had passed. Shrugging, the former Patriarch got up, pulled his own flute out and placed it beside that of his brother-in-law before going back to his seat while drinking.

The next to give in was Jin Ling, he mostly hesitated due to his maternal uncle neither saying nor doing a thing. Getting up from his seat, only two of the adults were surprised by the choice the youngest reluctant- and hesitantly made as he not only put down his fathers sword but also his outer robe before going back to his seat without daring to meet his uncles gaze.

,,Sect Leader Jiang..”

Again, Xichen tried his hardest in the most calm and gentle tone yet all the Jiang Sect Leader did was take a sip of his tea before saying in a tone that made it clear he was either too trapped or oblivious - maybe even both.

,,There’s no such thing for me.”


	182. A conversation that's long overdue | 10

,,Zidian.”

Well, as soon as his nephew brought up that name both the Jade and Wei Ying - who had leaned forward to be able to look at everyone else - saw how the raging ball of lightning clenched his right hand in a tight fist. It wasn’t until Jin Ling brought up the courage to get up, stand before his uncle and hold out his hand that Jiang Cheng gave in - not without a death glare being present. Once the ring was gone, Jin Ling brought it over to the table everything else had been collected on before sitting back down with Xichen following behind him.

,,Now that that is done, how about - for the time being only, of course - we refer to one another by our given names.”

,,That’s really going too far, Zewu-Jun..”

Wei Wuxian threw in, Jin Ling also quite quickly nodded to that while.. Jiang Cheng felt awkward just at the thought. Xichen, however, even let out a barely audible chuckle before replying in a less “professional” tone.

,,Technically, we have been related since almost two years at this point and apart from at official gatherings it would be normal to not refer to one another as “Zewu-Jun” and “Young Master Wei”.”

,,Well, there’s no change for me anyway..”

Jin Ling said in between of a shrug. It was around this time as well that it slowly made click for the former sworn brothers just what on earth the Lan Sects older Jade was getting at. Everyone had their alias, their title, something to put aside, just the youngest was always yet never only himself or a “sect leader in spe”.

,,The reason why no one ever uses your courtesy name is because.. I was the one to name you.”

It was a good thing that Jiang Cheng had by then nothing in his hand or else he probably would’ve crushed it. Wei Wuxian’s tone was low, raw in a way that wasn’t overly like him - the actor that always tried to be loud and bubbly.. Only the youngest of them didn’t know what to think nor how to react as he needed a few moments to not either run or say something based on a first impulse.

,,Why?”

Was at the end all Jin Ling brought out, his voice giving away that there was quite the inner turmoil going on that he tried to keep where it was.

,,Your mother requested that, your father gave in.”

Jiang Cheng explained in the calmest of tones he could manage.. In truth there was a part of him that didn’t want to rage when thinking about his sister, yet it was.. so damn hard not to. Silence spread for a few seconds at least before Jin Ling asked something that was quite understandable.

,,Then why did no one change it instead of always referring to me by my birth name?”

,,It was one of the last wishes of your mother to have him name you.”

Not only would it have been rather inappropriate to say more while an outsider was around, it was also rather clear that Jin Ling would need a few moments at least to stomach all of that. As another wave of silence threatened to drown them Xichen spoke up again, his tone a tad more careful.

,,Wouldn’t it be better to change that? Or at least find another title.. because it isn’t good to never be able to be this or that entirely.”

,,No.. I.. I want to accept my mother’s wish. I’m not aware of everything that has happened in the past, all I can do and did so far was judge based on one side of every story.. I don’t wish to keep that up. If there is a sect related matter, even though right now I want to be looked at as myself and not anything or anyone else.. I will stick to the courtesy name that was given to me.”

,,That’s a mature and noble decision. I will make sure to remember and help others recall that as well in case they may forget.”

Xichen replied, ignoring the looks of Jin Ling and Wei Wuxian that were.. still not entirely able to believe their eyes, yet after the compliment the youngest one dropped his head rather fast out of embarrassment.

,,Now, to get to your question. It’s not that I didn’t wish to be a sect leader.. but I am but human as well, it’s… scary, in truth, to think about being in charge of so many lifes, the one to make choices for all of them if it is necessary.. Being a Sect Leader is more than wearing expensive robes and living in luxury, you are always the face of those you are in charge of, no matter the time of the day, your mood, or whatever else there might be.”

,,What if you don’t want to be that person..?”

Jin Ling asked rather hesitantly without even looking up.. If it wouldn’t have been as inappropriate he honestly felt like just crying at the imagination of it all.. Sure, there was a part of him that had confidence, yet the more he thought and heard the less he was sure that it was enough.

,,You are in the unlucky position where you are more or less unable to choose.. It was similar when I turned into the Sect Leader of Gusu Lan. I had to turn into the leader right there and then, without knowing if my sect would still be intact after I had to flee.. I didn’t want to leave, I wished to fight, yet..”

,,I’m quite frankly pissed off that you’ve never mentioned any of what I had to hear to me before. However, I’m just going to make it short. There are only a few that wanted to be in that position, but what you have to ask yourself is: Do you want someone else in that position?”

Jiang Cheng threw in, his tone serious but over all far too similar to his usual one that his nephew felt his heart drop a few floors down at least. He felt guilty, scared, even more unsure now which lead him to not say a word for quite a while as he felt the stares of the adults on him. At the end the youngest spoke truthfully, regardless of his tone giving away that he expected even more backlash from it.

,,I’m afraid.. I don’t understand..”

,,I think what he's referring to is what Jingyi said earlier and you over all sounding as if you don't want to have your position as a leader."

,,It's understandable if you don't want your position because of the things you don't agree with that have happened or been caused by your Sect.. Yet to give you a different perspective to look at all of that.."

The Lan Sect Leader continued as Wei Wuxian also didn't quite manage to hit what both he himself and Wanyin were trying to say. Letting out a soft breath, Xichen fixed his eyes on a spot behind them, talking to them while at the same time trying to more speak his mind.

,,Do you want someone else to take your place.. And with that your chance to change what you don't agree with in your Sect? Or possibly make what you don't agree with even worse? When you take the position as a leader you are able to change everything for the better or worse."


	183. A conversation that's long overdue | 11

Well, Wei Wuxian felt rather dumb for not realising faster as both his and Jin Ling's eyes finally widened in realisation. However, after that everyone still remained silent for a bit before again the youngest of the four asked another question.

,,So.. You also don't agree with everything in your sect?"

,,Who does?”

It probably was the first time for at least two of them to get a deeper insight in who Lan Xichen was.. yet even though they had such a conversation before, hearing the Lan Sect Leader admit it so.. casually almost still hit Wanyin differently as well. It had a different impact because right now they weren’t alone, no chance for the words only being said to coax or reassure him.

,,A-Ling, honestly.. I don’t really know what to say but that the changes you want for your sect only you can bring.”

Jin Ling’s eyes flickered about for a few seconds, unsure yet finally understand better.. or at least more, even if everything combining was still.. a lot to work with and process. He had neither expected his uncle to address him like that, nor make that clear of a statement without entirely losing his mind - not that the boy would’ve blamed him at this point in time even if Jiang Cheng did so.

,,If I may add.. You are not alone. Many of the matters that make you doubt, were matters that we as the elders should’ve and could’ve prevented. I, as the Sect Leader of Gusu Lan, but also as a person, am more than willing to support you and the same goes for Sizhui and Jingyi as well.”

,,Same here. Not gonna lie, we did.. mess up, in far too many ways.”

It had been a while since Wei Wuxian had last felt the need to really add something, but now he did - casually, yet with the truth behind his words being audible. As the youngest dared to glance over at his maternal uncle, the latter also gave it a nod.

,,Now, if you excuse me, I shall go outside and see if things have calmed down.”

They had reached a point where the Jade felt comfortable leaving them alone to take care of the remaining matters where he felt like his presence.. would not be appropriate. And so, with a slight bow of his head and a smile too bright for the other three playing on his lips he turned on his heel and walked back over to the table to.. quite literally get back into his “role”.

Both, the former Patriarch and the Jiang Sect Leader, were just about to nudge the one that remained in their middle in the side as Jin Ling already spoke up all on his own - his tone somewhat.. shy, but more guilty in sound.

,,Sect Leader Lan?”

,,Yes?”

,,.. Thank you.. and.. I’m sorry for causing two of your sects disciples trouble.. Also for hurting them both, more so Jingyi.”

Instead of replying instantly, Xichen put his ribbon in place first and collected Liebing before walking back to the youngest. Once there, the Jade put a hand on Jin Ling’s shoulder - the touch so faint and gentle yet strong while his gaze was so piercingly caring and soft that none of the three others knew what was more irritating.

,,Jingyi made the choice himself. I am not the one you should apologise to.. But what I still want to say: There will be many times in your life where you will be scared, yet change only comes when the first person is willing to cope with it, in order to take the first step.”

And with that the tallest of them quite literally disappeared the way he came: out of nowhere, swift like the wind and with everyone else being just as confused and stunned as the other.

,,He’s.. intense..”

,,Dazzling and bright.. It’s not the right time for that but believe me there was almost no one who didn’t feel a weird something for Zewu-Jun, no matter the generation.”

For once neither Jin Ling nor Wanyin could disagree with Wei Wuxian. They all felt.. touched, just.. too deeply. At the end each one of them reached and drowned half of a jar of liquor almost in sync to.. get over it all.

,,What’s with all the other things Jingyi said?”

Wei Wuxian then dared to get back to the conversation around two minutes after Xichen had left, trying to sound as casual as possible while knowing that Wanyin would only speak up when it was necessary.. which probably wasn’t even that bad of an idea. Jin Ling, however, let out a heavy breath, taking a bit to think about how he should word what he wanted yet didn’t wish to talk about.

,,I just.. feel like whatever I do it’s all about the sect. It’s not that I don’t understand, I’m the last of the Jin Sects main bloodline.. But no matter how bad I act, what I want, have.. it’s all about the sect or due to that, none of it is my own..”

,,You tryna say that you’re fed up with having everything thrown after you without having lost a nail or finger for it?”

Wanyin really had seen too much to get surprised by many things still.. hearing his nephew, the spoiled boy that loved to brag about his never ending financial stability be done with that however.. Even the always grumpy and angry Jiang Sect Leader couldn’t help but speak up full of disbelief. That boy had really grown up and hell did it make both of his “uncles” feel old and out of place.

,,Kind of, I guess.. It’s more that, even when I try to do something someone is always around taking the final steps for me or sheltering me and all of that. It’s not that I don’t understand but..”

,,It’s frustrating that even though you know that you’re supposed to take over a sect you can’t even choose a thing yourself. I mean, again, not a sect leader but.. if everything is always decided for you etc how are you supposed to grow confident in being able to lead a sect on your own.”

,,It’s just that I don’t know why I should take over a sect when nothing is my decision and everything gets decided by those that I don’t want to be the face of?”

Jin Ling admitted after Wei Wuxian tried to make sense of and confirm a few more things just to make sure. The youngest ones way of replying was almost a question, further making it audible how unsure he was because of it all combining.

,,I wasn’t as much at your heels the past few months because I felt like you should get used to being a leader on your own.. However, I wasn’t aware of how far your sects elders went, they did notify me about a few matters when I asked, yet most things you say weren’t happening to my knowledge.”

The Jiang Sect leader started, of course only for his nephew to misunderstand the intention of his words. It was rather noticeable that Jiang Cheng grew rather agitated, no matter how far he managed to keep himself composed on the outside as he took a break to clear his throat.

,,You don’t have to look like I’ve just abandoned you on the road for nothing. I’m not saying that you’re lying, but those elders need to hear a few things. Once we leave, tomorrow, we will go to them and talk. The way they are going about things breaks the base of the conditions we made about you remaining in the Jin Sect many years ago. If they wish to turn you into their new puppet, they can search for someone else as well.


	184. A conversation that's long overdue | 12

||He grew up so well..||

Wei Ying thought to himself as all of Jin Ling’s attention was fixed on Jiang Cheng and no one was looking at him. There was for a short moment only this tight feeling coming from the smallest ones chest, stinging in his eyes with a sad yet proud smile playing on his lips. Wanyin had grown up well, he was too much like his mother - not that it wasn’t understandable - yet he had a good core, a Jiang core.

After a few seconds of feeling a stare on him, the only active sect leader of the round furrowed his brows, his gaze dark just like his aura. As he then looked over to the youngest, who was too surprised to even look away Jiang Cheng added something else that he hadn’t yet said to his nephew.. at least not that Jin Ling could remember.

,,If they dare to think you’re the property of the LanLing Jin Sect they’re mistaken. Just like if they think that they can mess with a Jiang. Regardless of where you grew up, after everything, the place you belong is YunMeng Jiang. You aren’t their plaything.”

,,But.. you heard what A-Yi said.. about the way I think..”

With that the youngest finally managed to rip his gaze away from his maternal uncle, staring at the jar in his hands while fiddling with it. Wei Wuxian at the time decided to remain silent, giving his former sworn brother the chance to say whatever he felt was right before he would eventually clear up something.. Something he was preparing himself to say out loud for the first time.

,,As much as it infuriates me,.. If I’m honest, I can’t blame you for feeling that way. You have gone through a lot due to the decision your parents.. more so A-Li made… And even I don’t know what she was thinking, if after everything she was even thinking still.. I can’t lie to you and say the way you think is wrong or right, I don’t know. Even I cannot forgive or understand the decision she made.”

~💙~

After a few minutes of silence, while the rest of the initial group settled at the other end of the dining hall just as silently.. Wei Wuxian then finally broke it without looking at either of his lost family.

,,Your father..”

,,Wei Wuxian.”

Jiang Cheng growled, unwilling to let his nephew hear whatever the other had to say.. Meanwhile Jin Ling had already looked over, his gaze flickering about unsure if he wanted to hear while at the same time impatience spread through him.

,,A-Cheng, just.. Let me tell him. Give me a few minutes of trust for a last time.”

The former Patriarchs tone was soft, yet there was the hoarse hint of all sorts of emotions adding together lingering. It wasn’t what Jiang Cheng wanted, he had never wanted any of that.. yet just alone hearing the other refer to him the way he did - it hurt, it stung, it felt so familiar while nothing was the same any longer. It trapped the Jiang Sect Leader in a bit of a state of his own as he remained silent while both he and Jin Ling watched Wei Wuxian get up; only to stand in front of the youngest so he could look directly into his eyes and choose for himself whether he believed the story or not.

,,We didn’t always like your father. He was arrogant, impossible to deal with because he always thought he was the best, the most worthy. When we studied in Gusu, the reason why I was sent home early was because Zixuan belittled your mother. At the time their engagement was forced, both mother’s had set it up regardless of how their children felt about it.”

It was quite a lot for Jin Ling to process, yet again.. His gaze flickered about as at the end he spoke up, trying to defend the father he had never met properly in an understandably upset tone.

,,If you’re intending to only badmouth my father then you can let it be as well.”

,,He’s not.”

Both Wei Wuxian and the youngest were equally as surprised that Jiang Cheng out of all people spoke up, more so positively towards the one he held.. troubled emotions for.

,,He’s right. Due to the fight that broke out the engagement got cancelled.. Your mother, who had always had a soft spot for Zixuan tried her hardest to not make her heartache noticeable.. But surprisingly your father began to change after that. It’s a long story but at one of the last gatherings I was officially invited to they had another falling out.. before your father yelled in front of everyone that he had been the one who wished to invite your mother.. And then he ran away when he realised, blushing from head to toe.”

Well, the youngest ones expression distorted into so much disbelief and awkwardness, the thought crossing his mind how bad it was that he felt second-hand embarrassed for his dad. Meanwhile Jiang Cheng had drank a sip of his liquor before running his hand over his injured cheek, as Wei Wuxian couldn’t quite hide that he did still felt somewhat amused when thinking of that memory while blending the end of everything out.

,,Your father was nasty at first.. We even called him “peacock” because of his entire behaviour-”

,,You mean you did.”

Jiang Cheng corrected, rather unamused - ignoring that he remembered it having been funny to him once as well and for once Wei Ying was the one to roll his eyes at that.

,,Either way..”

Wei Wuxian started after a few moments again in between of letting out a heavy breath. His tone lower, drawing in the attention of both his former sworn brother and “nephew” since there was quite a bit of seriousness audible as well.

,,I always doubted your father. Yet.. We stood face to face as the Jin Sect attacked me.. He looked me in the eyes as I lost control and he died. Regardless how I thought of him, I can’t explain the shock I felt.. the guilt, self-hatred, just alone for the fact that your mother had finally married the man she always loved and he.. He died trying to clear up the situation that had unfolded behind his back.”

It was one of the hardest things Wei Ying had done in both of his lifetimes… Standing in front of the boy he named, forcing himself to keep the eye contact as those that perfectly mirrored the ones of his beloved A-Li, the eyes of her son, filled with tears and hurt, rage and hatred, confusion.. Wei Wuxian had wanted to never do that, to keep running and running until his time would come again to leave this world.. but that wouldn’t be fair, on no one - and especially not Jin Ling.

,,Why..?”

,,I.. I didn’t believe him when he said he didn’t know, it only made me more upset. I lost control over Wen Ning who, at the time, hadn’t regained his consciousness.. He was a puppet, even though I never wish for anyone to see or think of him as a plaything. It wasn’t his fault, his decision, it was my doing.. just like Nie Huaisang said..”


	185. A conversation that's long overdue | 13

There wasn't a single one of the three that didn't grit his teeth, each out of a different reason and taken over by a different set of emotions - all negative though.

,,Was it on purpose?"

Wei Wuxian eyes widened, he hadn't often seen Jin Ling serious.. and right now he was more than dead serious, looking so similar to Jiang Cheng that it was rather creepy.

,,It wasn’t."

,,There are at least two reasons why we lost control at the time."

Apart from Wanyin, who was already glaring at Wen Ning who had approached them as the other two were conversing.. Wei Wuxian and Jin Ling were both caught by surprise, the younger one even flinched due to how intensely he had tried to read how much truth there was the Patriarch’s words as well as eyes.

,,Wen Ning, don’t.”

,,Young Master Wei.. It’s time.”

Even the Jiang Sect Leader couldn’t fully make out what the General and his former sworn brother were talking about so cryptically. Wen Ning had turned and walked over to collect the youngest ones robe before coming back. Wanyin was only able to make out from a few different things that whatever this Wen guy had to say was nothing too pleasant to hear, experience told him that much. However, Jin Ling also sensed that something was off by how Wei Ying tried to stop his “friend”, even more so as the Patriarch only hesitantly stepped to the side as the General tried to take his spot in front of the future Jin Sect Leader.

,,The first reason would be the mental condition young master Wei was in at the time-”

,,My condition doesn’t matter, nor does it change a thing.”

,,Young Master, other than me you are not trapped in a state where you will never be able to move on, live.. Please stop being so uncaring about how big of a chance you have gotten.. Communicate, let yourself heal, move on properly, apologise. Please, just for once, for the sake of all those that were unnecessarily robbed of their ability to do so: live. I won’t always be there to talk for you.”

Both Wanyin and the future Jin Sect leader were confused.. even though they partially understood the issue, it was still.. neither the right time nor place for any of that, was it? Apart from that they felt this strange rush of discomfort spread deep down - the kind where you, again, know something not so pleasant is about to come your way. To their surprise, regardless of fear and a large variety of negative emotions being visible on Wei Wuxian’s face he still spoke up.. in a equally as serious as pleading tone.

,,This is not the time to make up excuses for me, or even talk about me. I will do so at some point, but not now.”

,,Young master Rulan.. You have asked me repeatedly at this point how I died.. and I’m going to warn you now, nothing about this part of my life will be pleasant for you to hear.. yet, please, hear me out entirely.”

Wen Ning turned back to the youngest, still holding the golden robe in his hand and his tone minimally changed.. And while everything affected Jin Ling, the boys uncle wasn’t too fond of all that was going on - prompting the Jiang Sect Leader to speak up in a.. somewhat understandable threatening tone.

,,I dare you to say one wrong word.”

,,Uncle.. let him talk.”

Gritting his teeth the Sect leader forced himself to stay put and calm for the time being.. his nephew sounded too curious, too reassuring and calming for his liking however. What Jiang Cheng didn't know was that Wei Ying also didn't favour the direction they were heading.

,,Many years ago, all those that had the last name Wen were the same. I have told you that before.. We had gotten captured, abused and starved while being forced to erase the engravings of the walls of our sects history. The reason why I refrained from going into detail about my death is because.. I died at the hands of the LanLing Jin Sect."

While Wanyin tried to reach for Zidian that hadn't been placed back on his finger - Wei Wuxian also felt this tickling in the palm of his hand.. they both wanted to slap the General right there and then because that was really the revelation Jin Ling didn't need at that point in time. At all. As they dared to glance over they could watch how the color of the youngest ones face changed repeatedly - just like earlier, but worse. Even the in fists clenched hands of the future Jin Sect Leader were noticeably shaking still.

,,Why do I know nothing about that?"

,,It was for your own sake."

,,For my sake?!"

At first Jin Ling didn't even have the strength in himself left to yell. He was too confused, shaken up, feeling sick in the stomach and ready to run like how he had done before so many times.. However, as Jiang Cheng said what he did, with a bit of a raised voice the future Sect leader also found his own ability to do so again. Only briefly did their eyes meet before the boys maternal uncle made a.. slight mistake with glaring at Wen Ning while trying to explain.

,,You weren't supposed to feel pity for the one that killed your father. Both I and the Jin Sect decided to only give you a limited amount of information, seal everything else or not write it down in the first place."

,,Isn't that my decision to make? Am I not allowed to know the truth in order to be able to decide what I want for my own future?! You say the Jin Sect shouldn't dare see me as their plaything, yet you're planting bitterness and blind hatred in my mind since so many years.."

,,Young master Rulan, your uncle is right. No matter what, I was the one that killed your father. Master Wei was the one to let me kill more of your sect before that.. The second reason why your father died that day is because-"

,,You were no different from Chifeng-Zun.. You felt or smelled Jin presence and you lost control."

Wen Ning nodded as he tightened the grip around the youngest ones robes.. it was yet also wasn't surprising how quickly Jin Ling connected the dots, professionally and distanced almost.. or clear headed despite his momentary emotional rollercoaster going mad inside him.

,,What your uncle is wrong about, however.. I don't want your pity.. I want you to be aware, but more than about my death.. I want you to be aware of the fact that your father's last words were that your mother was still waiting at Koi Tower for Master Wei to celebrate your first month with them."

,,That's true.. I only realised then that.. Zixuan had changed so much.. I thought he was trying to lure me into another trap, yet.. all he had in mind was for your mother to be happy.."

Wei Wuxian lowly admitted, his voice quivering and unstable as he had turned away from the other three by then.. Meanwhile, both Jiang Cheng and Jin Ling heard of that for the first time and especially the youngest didn't know how to react, what to feel or think..


	186. A conversation that's long overdue | 14

,,What is your point of telling me this now.. where I’m already debating if I even want to take over my sect?”

,,I would like to know that as well.”

,,I think he’s further trying to explain or.. highlight the fact that everyone.. everything is capable of change, even if you don’t see or expect it..”

Wei Wuxian explained in Wen Ning’s stead after both Jin Ling and Jiang Cheng had spoken up rather.. agitatedly. It wasn’t like the former Patriarch was either wrong, or entirely right.. yet none of the three “Jiangs” expected what the General did next as he dropped down to his knees, holding out the younger ones robes into the latters direction.

,,While Master Wei is right.. I wish for you to know that neither did I intend to harm your father.. nor do I entirely blame the Jin Sect. Everyone deserves a second chance and I hope that you will give all of us this chance.. Your sect, family, friends,.. If none of us, I believe you can bring the change, if not a better one than your father would’ve brought.”

For the first time in quite a while Wei Wuxian also turned back around, staring at his.. friend just as wide-eyed and baffled than the other two. After at least two minutes of Wen Ning holding out the golden robe of the Jin Sect that had brought more harm than good for an endless amount of people - when Jiang Cheng was just about to break this ridiculous situation off.. Nodding to himself, Jin Ling swallowed a last time before reaching out to take the robes.

,,I’m still unsure.. There is a lot I need to think about carefully.. yet your words helped.. Thank you.. and I’m sorry.”

,,You can’t believe how sorry I am.”

Wen Ning responded rather quickly, half bowing with his head down and really.. they were all aware that it was too early, maybe impossible to hear a “It’s alright.” back for the General.

,,Now.. I will leave you alone again.. We can talk about more when it’s necessary, young master Rulan.”

,,If you’re talking to be personally.. please refer to me by my given name, if you wish to address me as a potential sect leader.. then you’re free to use the one my mother wanted me to have and keep.”

,,You are.. truly strong. You have a good heart, just like your mother.”

,,Wait! You.. You knew her?”

While neither Wei Wuxian nor Wanyin could disagree with the Generals last statement, the Jiang Sect Leader still struggled with telling himself to just let it go.. not to snap, leave it be. At the same time though, even though it had only been meant as a rather innocent compliment before Wen Ning knew what happened.. Jin Ling had already gotten a hold of his - or more Mingjue’s - sleeve as the long deceased had gotten ready to leave.

,,I’ve only came to enjoy the big heart of your mother once. That was before she and Jin Zixuan had gotten married.. She was so nice that even though I was already what I am now as well.. She still was so nice to give me a bowl of her homemade soup..”

And with that the youngest let go of the Generals sleeve, watching how the latter walked back to the group of Lan’s. It was something Wen Ning would probably take to his grave, the fact that even though technically deceased he was already feeling too much pain and guilt remembering that to dare meet the eyes of Jin Ling. Another secret of his was.. just how badly he regretted not having ate that bowl of soup, maybe it would’ve ended him right there and then.. which.. probably, maybe, honestly… would’ve been for the better, even in Wen Ning’s own eyes.

~💙~

,,How much of what all three of you have said so far was the truth?”

Quite a bit of time had passed silently. At some point the former Patriarch had sat back down, drinking just like the other two did while.. everything that had happened and was still going on didn’t even properly sink in. It was like a blur, it all simply happened and everything else would come in quite the aftermath for sure. The first to speak up as they sat there with their minds blank yet wandering places at the same time was Jin Ling, his tone full of question while it sounded terribly empty as well.

,,I hate to admit it, but I don’t think any of us lied.”

For a second the youngest couldn’t help but eye his maternal uncle suspiciously, not that Jiang Cheng’s tone left room for doubt or suspicion.. it was still off to hear him admit such a thing. Taking a look at his.. in his other uncles body trapped “somewhat uncle” he also could see that Wei Wuxian was looking too down and serious still for lies being possible.

,,I didn’t like A-Xuan for a long time either. However, the joy towards their marriage at the end, even more so your birth and all the ceremonies was too genuine to keep on hating him. He ran around like a fool throwing out money wherever he could for anything that you could need - while at the end all you were interested in was his sword. He had wasted so much money on all kinds of toys yet he didn’t care and was the happiest one could be about your choice.”

,,Looking back.. Much of my hatred towards Jin Zixuan came from me being unwilling to understand his behaviour. He always thought he deserved better, that he was the best, yet that was caused by the way he was raised. At the end, he chose your mother all on his own.. once his mind could process that there was someone who loved him for him, unconditionally.”

,,I.. understand that..”

It didn’t matter all that much to Jin Ling at the time that his “uncles” weren’t.. yet were indirectly talking to one another.. He got answers, honest ones, those that all three of them were able to say and hear while most was for another time when - hopefully - Jiang Cheng and Wei Ying would’ve had a conversation of their own. Only when Jin Ling admitted to understand the last part did a more.. normal side of the Patriarch come back through as Wei Wuxian chuckled and took a sip of his drink before nudging his “nephew” in the side with his elbow. His tone such a tease just like his words that while Jiang Cheng felt irritated as anything the boy just wanted to run - almost instantly his mind shut down on the heavy topics from before.

,,Oh, Sect Leader Jiang what are you planning to do now that A-Ling admitted he’s in love?~”

,,I never admitted such a thing!!”

,,You didn’t say it’s not the truth either though! Hah!”

Wei Wuxian laughed so loudly that both “Jiangs” furrowed their brows, annoyed by the noise that even attracted the attention of the entire “Lan group” from the other end of the room. It really was.. a never ending rollercoaster ride, their lives, this trip, just everything.


	187. A conversation that's long overdue | 15

,,No, but seriously now.. this entire situation between you and A-Yuan sounds like a lovers fight."

Wei Wuxian added as no one else replied to him, his tone a little more serious even though he still wanted to do nothing more than tease. What made the jaws of both adults give in slightly, however, was as they both looked at Jin Ling who had gone bright red as he stared down at his liquor jar. Jiang Cheng who was about to snap something back at his former sworn brother initially felt his brain give up in his head.. Other than that of Wei Wuxian.

,,Did something happen between you two? There have been a lot of mentions about last night.."

,,It's nothing."

,,How can you say "it's nothing" with that bright red face of yours?"

Just like before the only response the Patriarch got was.. silence and to both his and Wanyins surprise their nephews face only went redder as the boy momentarily closed his eyes - probably in hopes to have them disappeared by the time he would open them again. Lifting his hand to his chin Wei Ying thought for a moment before trying again.

,,Or was it between the three of you?"

,,Just shut up already!"

The youngest of them got up from his spot so fast to snap at Wei Ying that he almost threw his other uncle from the table - without realising until the former Patriarch burst out laughing while looking at Wanyin.. who was barely hanging on at this point and really not pleased at all. Instinctively Jin Ling backed off a little from the angry ball of lightning.

,,It's fine, it's fine. It was my fault. I shouldn't have teased you that much, at the end of the day it's all fine and well isn't it?"

,,Well.. no, not really.. Zewu-Jun, uncle and I are all three in the same position.. We're the last of our bloodline, we need to bring forth a heir if we want to keep our sects running how they have so far.."

,,Forget it, there’s no use talking to him about that. He has gotten what he wanted without thinking about what it means for others most of the time.”

Jiang Cheng thew in as his nephew had sat back down in between of him and Wei Ying and honestly neither of the other two could deny the truth behind those words. A few moments passed in silence between them with each thinking about something.. at the end it was the Jiang Sect Leader that spoke up truthfully yet the words over all were a surprise.

,,I understand how you feel. Not everyone has the luck to find a person that sees them beyond being a sect leader.. However, there are most of the time always ways to make things work.. and for now, we’re all young enough still to live freely. I didn’t take note of how you felt, nor about how pressured you were.. so for now, live and everything else we’ll think about when the time comes.”

,,Right now.. I think I should go and clear things up with A-Yi and A-Yuan.. even though there are more things I’d like to hear from both of you as well.”

,,Just go already.”

The Jiang Sect Leader said as the youngest didn’t move, clearly unsure about what he wanted or should do now. For once Wanyin’s tone was rather.. nice? Even though a part of him just wanted to get away from Wei Wuxian and stop talking about the past at least for a little while - both of the former sworn brothers were aware that they wouldn’t be able to run from it all for forever. After a last few seconds of hesitating and debating Jin Ling then got up, which Jiang Cheng did as well as he spoke up in between which caused his nephew to turn back around to face him; eyes wide full of surprise and more disbelief.

,,A-Ling.. After we went to the Jin Sect, let’s get you a break and come to Lotus Pier for a short while.”

,,Alright, uncle.”

Jin Ling knew his uncle well enough by then to be aware of the hidden meanings a few of the things Jiang Cheng said or did had.. Right now the statement was for his sake, for him to be able to think and decide without the pressure of the Jin Sect’s over all presence.. The youngest was more than thankful and glad, yet he knew that sadly his uncle wasn’t overly affectionate so he kept his reply short, bowed in respect and walked off..

~💙~

,,What were the agreements you had initially made for Jin Ling’s upbringing with the Jin Sect?”

The air around Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian was so.. horribly tense, one could cut the air from all the things that they had left unsaid and also the words that had been said the.. last hour or so. It was unclear for both of them at this point if what they needed was a last falling out, a fight, or something else. Once they had silently watched Jin Ling collect the two Lan’s to another table in a corner of the dining hall.. Wei Ying had spoken up, his tone distanced yet serious and more matured - he was clearly being careful about each move he made, another thing that made the difference of their bond between past and now so much more real.

,,He would spend half the time in Yunmeng, half the time in LanLing. When GuangYao was alive still I planned to keep Jin Ling out of all the sect matters for as long as possible while making sure he would at some point be able to take his rightful position.”

The - now - technically older one of them replied after taking a while to decide if he even wanted to do so.. and after letting it sink in Wei Wuxian nodded. It was hard to think so carefully about each word, each tone of voice, or over all reaction in front of and towards someone where nothing had mattered once.

,,You have thought about taking him entirely to Lotus Pier before, haven’t you?”

,,It’s one thing if you decide for yourself to ignore anything about you to do what you have to or if it’s the life of someone else.”

,,Come on.. We both know that deep down you have such a soft spot for him that you’d like to tug him under your arm and never let him go if you could.”

,,Other than you I know who’s side to stay on and where my place is.”

Well.. at the end of it all Wei Wuxian was left behind feeling as if someone - a certain Jiang someone - had first punched him in the stomach and then once he collapsed to the ground the certain someone stepped on him and stood there.. That feeling kept lingering for quite a while as well. Jiang Cheng had gotten up while saying his last line before walking back over to the Lan group that was consisting of Xichen, Wangji and Jingyi only at this point.. Wei Wuxian joined a few minutes later.


	188. Chapter 188

,,Where’s Wen Ning?”

The former Patriarch asked once he had joined those that were secretly yet frequently glancing over at Jin Ling and Sizhui - they were talking still, all alone, half cozied up. Just like the two Juniors, however, both former Jiang siblings also got a critical and questioning look from the three remaining Lans that neither reacted to.

,,Sect Leader Nie came not long after Senior Wen came back.”

,,Am I the only one who feels like there’s something going on?”

,,No.”

Honestly, Wangji spoke so rarely that everyone was surprised that after Jingyi replied to Wei Wuxian’s first the younger Jade replied to his husbands second question.. while all others agreed silently with concerned looks or a nod.

,,Huaisang isn’t dumb enough to mess with the corpse.”

,,Sect Leader Jiang, the corpse has a name.”

One day.. One day, everyone was sure, that Jingyi and the raging ball of purple lightning would clash the way Jingyi did earlier with Jin Ling.. just that it probably wouldn’t end as well for the Un-Lan Lan. Even now again they were glaring at each other - it was like watching thunder and lightning go up against one another.. equally as thrilling as concerning.

,,As I just said and Huaisang earlier.. What Wen Ning did was mostly my fault. And no one here should be allowed to judge, we’ve all done cruel things for revenge against the Wen’s.”

,,I have to agree.. Even though I still find the circumstances hard to understand, if the Ghost General wouldn’t have the last name he inherited no one would’ve blamed him for fighting against those that harmed his family or even himself.”

Jiang Cheng wasn’t sure what was worse, that they were right.. or that Xichen put himself on the side of the Ghost General out of all people. It made sense, it wasn’t like Wanyin didn’t understand.. but at the same time.. Why did his life has to be such a hole full of shit?

,,What are you talking about?”

,,Oh, the lovebirds are back!~ Did you clear up your first fight as a couple?”

,,Senior Wei, please..”

Out of nowhere Jin Ling had reappeared with Sizhui sticking close to his heels.. and as Wei Wuxian felt the need to tease them, even though Jin Ling managed to mostly maintain a poker-face apart from a glare getting thrown at the Yiling Patriarch.. the latters adoptive son tried to reason why his dad - vainly, of course.

,,You two looked so close just now.. How far have you gone so far?~”

,,We were talking about that Sect Leader Nie called Senior Wen out again to accompany him somewhere.”

Jingyi threw in, to the relief of literally everyone other than Wei Wuxian who pouted like mad.. However, even though the youngest and oldest of the Juniors also looked rather weirded out and concerned as they heard that.. the (technically) youngest senior couldn’t just let his moment be ruined.

,,So a threeway relationship? I didn’t think that Jingyi would be the one to hold you together..”

,,He has to hold something at least.”

Jin Ling replied so coldly and blunt that even the great Hanguang-Jun briefly felt his spit get stuck in his throat.. at the same time Wanyin was trying his hardest to talk himself into being deaf, Jingyi was death glaring at the future Jin Sect Leader and Xichen had even gone slightly red in the face due to shock.

,,Damned arrogant asshole.”

,,Wait.. Oh, I was supposed to be scared just now, wasn’t I?”

,,You just wait.”

,,There’s so much tension between you two, you definitely haven’t gotten “that far” yet.”

Regardless of having death glared at one another until then, as the Patriarch felt the need to comment further on their “status” and “relationship development” the glares simultaneously got directed at him instead.. Of course, Wei Ying only got more amusement out of it as he grinned like an idiot - or like the idiot that he was; who knew with him, really.

,,So.. my.. Senior Wen is with Sect Leader Nie again?”

Sizhui asked as everyone else grew silent enough for him to be able to do so once he had pulled Jin Ling down to sit beside him. The seniors then collectively nodded and a minute or so passed before Xichen broke the silence.

,,I don’t think there is a threat.. Young Master Wen is.. in a similar state to A-Jue, I think that is the main reason for A-Sang’s interest.”

,,It would make sense.. It must be terrible for Huaisang to know that he helped in my resurrection, probably hoping for me to be able to bring Chifeng-Zun back.. and I couldn’t do anything while Wen Ning is out there as well.”

,,It’s not like Senior Wen is living a proper life though.. There.. honestly have been times where I thought or wished for at least one of my parents to be there no matter their condition for a day at least.. but the more I know about his condition, the less I would wish for even my worst enemy to be trapped like that for a whole new lifetime.”

Regardless of feeling like he needed to throw up, yet again, Jiang Cheng honestly understood his nephew… It grossed him out, yet if any of them would really listen to this devilish voice deep down inside them each single one of them had had such a thought - maybe a few were still having it. It didn’t matter if Jin Ling with his parents, Wen Ning with his sister, Wei Wuxian who had played often with the thought of bringing back a few of those that wrongfully found their death..  
However, it were exactly all the things Jin Ling had thought of as well that made everyone refrain from admitting to the thought.. or try to do so in the first place.  
And honestly, for the briefest of seconds the Jiang Sect Leader caught himself glancing at Lan Xichen, questioning who he would want to have back.. Chifeng-Zun? Or worse, Jin GuangYao, who still no one knew really what exactly their relationship had been? It only made Wanyin feel more sick in the stomach.

,,How different would you all think if there would be a different ritual that would allow the person you wish to have back to be entirely themselves?”

,,A-Yi, you shouldn’t ever think about that.”

,,It might be unorthodox, yet Zewu-Jun.. Isn’t it worth getting to know how much such a simple change would affect our way of thinking about such a ritual? Or for each of us as a person?”

No one expected that Jingyi would be the one to freeze the air around them like that.. but even more so make each single one of them question themselves the way they did now - all due to a simple question that not only one of them had asked themselves by now.. yet having it said out loud was a completely different matter.


	189. Chapter 189

,,I suppose since no one spoke up you have gotten your answer."

,,The answer is that everyone has the same and it doesn't go well with the way we got raised to see what's right and wrong."

It didn't sit well with Xichen, who had broken the silence after a minute or two, nor with Wanyin that his nephew gave the other statement.. that none of the could disagree nor openly agree with regardless of everyone knowing.

,,A-Ling, I think you got the eyes of your mom."

,,The hell??"

Was it rather ironic that the future Jin Sect Leader managed to sound irritated but more so disgusted as Jingyi said that out of nowhere so dead serious. There was a bit of a smirk appearing on Jingyi's lips while most.. didn't know what to do or say apart from Wei Wuxian and Xichen because.. they were close enough to Jiang Cheng and the Patriarch formerly also to A-Li to know.

,,With how often Bianhua Shengshou and you are glaring at me I noticed that your eye colors are the same."

,,A-Yi.. I think that's really.."

,,A-Yuan, it's disrespectful to not look someone in the eyes while talking. It's not like I'm crushing on Sect Leader Jiang."

,,But on A-Ling."

,,Neither. Bianhua Shengshou is just glaring at me so often just like A-Ling that I couldn’t help but notice.”

There was no need for Jiang Cheng to even confirm the Lan boys words.. the way he was glaring at Jingyi while trying to avoid his nephews gaze said more than enough. No one else needed to confirm either, there were so many obvious similarities between them that it would take quite a while to go through all of them. Either way, it hurt both of the.. or all three Jiang’s differently.

,,A-Yi, you should neither talk so much nor the way you do, or else I won’t be able to refrain from letting you get punished.”

,,I apologise, Zewu-Jun.. I wasn’t trying to be rude, I simply gathered that no one else would tell him, or them.”

While Wanyin let out a huff as he shook his head, for once Xichen reached up to the middle of his brows - massaging a spot as he let out a soft breath.. Each last one gathered around the table thought the same time about the youngest Lan, in a different way but the general thought was “This boy..”.. just that the Jiang Sect Leader, Jingyi’s friends and even Wei Wuxian mentally added “has guts”.

,,Let’s go outside for a while, it would be disrespectful not to.”

After a few seconds full of heavy breaths, sighs and stretching everyone but Sizhui who had been the one to speak up nodded and so they headed outside with Wen Ning still missing.

~💙~

They also didn’t find Nie Huaisang or Wen Ning outside.. None of the group was overly sure how worrisome that was, yet after making a round to look at all the sculptures that only a few others were still “stalking” at this point..

,,So.. How about we make a snowball fight after all the trouble?”

Well, as soon as Wei Ying said that the Juniors were all like “Here” and “Yes”.. while Xichen, Wanyin and Wangji.. were unsure about just how good of an idea that was.. The first the two sect leader lost on “their team” however was Wangji.. the younger Jade of Gusu Lan couldn’t refrain from melting and giving in as his husband took his hand, looking up at him with those huge puppy eyes.. For a brief moment it looked as if Jiang Cheng had an issue with his facial muscles due to how it distorted.. and Xichen, even though in control over his own face, thought the same.. They had been able to watch Lan Zhan’s brain shut down.

At the end the only one to remain strong and stubborn was the purple ball of lightning.. He still remembered far too well how the last fight had ended and apart from that.. a lot of things could happen before he would embarrass himself like that. He had lost the Lan Sect Leader when “his boys” looked at him as if they were waiting for him to join or allow it.. and now Jiang Cheng not only felt annoyed but also weirdly betrayed. Weren’t they supposed to be adults? Apparently not.

The group then walked for quite a while - one reason being so they wouldn’t be seen, the other so that they wouldn’t accidentally harm someone who didn’t want to be involved again.. but wait.. Letting it sink in, why the hell did Jiang Cheng keep following them? He realised quick that it would likely turn into another nightmare for him.. yet there was the chance to see a few funny things as well, so.. His presence, however, left half the group feeling tense while the other half was.. somewhat glad and excited?

~💙~

,,Be careful.”

They all lost track of how often Xichen said that just alone within the first ten minutes. While Wei Ying and the Juniors were fully engaging in a semi-skilled snowball fight.. The Lan Sects older Jade and the Jiang Sect Leader.. simply stood at the side by some trees, watching half in horror and half in second-hand embarrassment. Wangji was participating.. just that he mostly avoided to hit the youths and instead only reacted to the many times his husband threw a wet, cold ball at him with hitting him back with one himself.

,,How is young master Jin?”

Honestly, Jiang Cheng had been waiting for some sort of try from his secret lover to engage in a conversation.. Which happened as soon as everyone else was too preoccupied to really notice. Xichen’s tone was just a normal one for him, their position nothing revealing just standing side by side all tall and prim and proud.

,,He’ll be alright. I’ll take him back to LanLing and then to Lotus Pier for a while.”

,,If you need any sort of advice, there was a phase where Wangji was thinking in a similar way to young master Jin.”

,,I appreciate the thought, Zewu-Jun.”

Due to how noisy the others were Xichen could let out a soft little breath of the sigh category.. The Jiang Sect leader was quite the hard nut to crack and not one to admit that he was too overwhelmed to even know what to do anymore.. However, after letting silence spread between the two of them for a minute, maybe a little longer.. the Jade then spoke up again, his tone minimally more soft, less “professional” as they watched how Jin Ling and Jingyi were at it again and Sizhui threw a few snowballs at them to get their attention away from one another.

,,How about you?”

,,I think I should concentrate more on the brat for a while.”

,,You won’t be able to support your nephew in such a critical time if you don’t make things out with yourself first.”

The taller one of them was completely aware of the true meaning of Wanyin’s words.. He was trying to shut him out, end things between them right then and there where the Jiang Sect Leader knew the other wouldn’t be able to say much - even less make a scene..


	190. Chapter 190

,,Whatever.”

Honestly.. Wanyin knew that he was yet again acting like a total piece of garbage. He wasn’t even sure if he acted how he did because he wanted the distance or if it was something like.. the fact that he feared how much longer he could keep himself together if Xichen would continue acting the way he did. The closer they got the more ridiculous and scary it felt to the younger sect leader, but - of course - he’d rather die than to.. communicate; he wasn’t born into the Jiang Sect for no reason.

Even though the cold and short reply stung for both of them, the Lan Sects older Jade accepted it. At least for now, maybe it was for the best in general.. If things would develop between his Junior and Wanyin’s nephew then.. the problem and choice were too obvious to ignore, yet Xichen still let out a heavy breath.

,,Zewu-Jun! Join us!”

,,I don’t think I should.”

It had taken longer than expected for Wei Wuxian to try and lure the two sect leader into playing with them.. but surely the tallest of them declined, hand raised to further prove how serious he was.

,,Sect Leader, have you ever acted like this before?”

,,I.. Once, yes, but many years have passed since.”

Xichen replied while keeping his friendly, composed facade up even as Jin Ling spoke to him.. before the boy got hit by another snowball, that was this time thrown at him by Sizhui.

,,You should try it.”

,,I.. It’s hard to admit but I’m rather clumsy.”

How much worse could it get than even Wangji trying to talk him into joining? Well, not like the older Jade could blame anyone since the only one that had known about his clumsiness was.. the late, long lost Meng Yao. Even though only briefly, Xichen had felt a cold gaze getting directed at him - from his right, the side Jiang Cheng was standing on.. yet at the end it was the Patriarch who spoke up next in the heat of the moment that got the Jiang Sect Leader to finally and completely disappear.

,,Jiang Cheng has always been good at that, you should train with him. He’s able to hit but also take the hits no matter how strong you throw.”

The final nail to the sinking ships coffin at the end, however, got hammered in by the three Juniors that still were nowhere near giving up on bringing the two sect leader together as they all said “You should, it’s fun” at the same time in a few different ways.

,,I refuse.”

Was all the Jiang Sect Leader said, uncaring about how disappointed quite a few of those that surrounded him looked. As if he’d act like a 5y.o around kids and even worse Wangji and Wuxian. It only took seconds before the fight continued anyway, so they couldn’t be that desperate for his participation either.

,,How is your body?”

,,Great apart from the fact that I need to step out.”

Xichen couldn’t tell from how sarcastic and coldly his.. lover.. probably now ex lover, replied to his simple, almost whispered question what part was the lie - or if everything or nothing was one in the first place. He was then left behind, standing there while trying his hardest not to make it visible as well as noticeable that he felt like a kicked pup - Jiang Cheng though.. simply disappeared without even looking back at him. That shouldn’t sting as badly, given that he had always known their end wouldn’t be a good one, or?

At some point while the raging, purple ball of lightning wasn’t around the Lan Sect Leader then gave in.. He needed distraction and as much as it went against his entire upbringing.. the snow fight did look like it would be able to keep his mind preoccupied.  
To be fair, most were rather surprised by Xichen even joining them, but more so about how dead-aim and hard to hit he was.. Speaking of hard, his balls really came with an impact.

~💙~

The Jiang Sect Leader hadn’t even been gone for so long. He had taken a leak and went about going back.. without really knowing why he should or would do so himself. Other than before the group seemed to have gotten a lot louder than before he went to take a leak.. just that now everyone sounded like they were getting hunted down by someone..

,,Uncle, duck!”

To be fair, Wanyin had been everywhere with his head but not in the there and then where quite a bunch of people threw around snowballs.. So it wasn’t overly surprising that when his nephew called out to him in a hurry and he finally managed to see the snowy texture fly towards him all he could do was step to the side… Of course, there hadn’t been the time left to look around to see whether or not the ground under his feet was save.. and so the next thing he knew was that his feet were slipping away underneath him and he landed with his already aching behind on the to the core frozen ground.

While everyone around the younger sect leader gasped in shock, or tried to refrain from bursting into a fit of laughter.. Wanyin was sitting there, aching even more than before from head to toe with Zidian emitting a few purple sparks as he gritted his teeth and clenched his hand into a fist - glaring, even though being unwilling to actually meet the gaze of anyone at this point in time where he cursed anything and everything in his mind.

,,Sect leader Jiang.. may I?”

Jiang Cheng was too lost in the rage he felt towards himself, the world and whoever threw the goddamn ball at him to recognize the voice that had called out to him.. It wasn’t until he lifted his head, looked at the person the voice belonged to and his identity sank in that his eyes that were already full of rage.. and anything but welcoming narrowed. Did the one closest to him have to be the Wen kid?

If it wouldn’t have been for the dead silence that automatically spread in quite the area around them as Sizhui stood there.. smiling the same way Xichen did, this damn warm and welcoming smile, slightly bend over with his hand stretched out.. If it wouldn’t have been for the Jiang Sect Leader knowing that everyone was staring at him - and with that also Jin Ling -.. If only.. Since all of that was the case however, just for once.. just this time Wanyin threw away his pride, swallowed his rage and the bitter liquid that rose from his stomach into his throat and took the hand of the Wen remnant to help him get back up on his own two feet.

,,Sect Leader Jiang.. Would it be possible for us to talk, just for a short while?”

Well, no one had expected Sizhui to say that and it was noticeable no matter how full or lacking of expression any of those around him usually was.


	191. Chapter 191

Knowing that he wouldn’t be able to say “No” without getting judged for the next century.. as Wanyin kept feeling the eyes of everyone else on him, including those of the Wen boy.. He finally, reluctantly nodded and while most went tense as well as worried just like his adoptive uncle.. Sizhui also showed the Jiang Sect Leader the sweetest of smiles before walking off so they could talk, shortly followed by Wanyin who didn’t look at anyone.

,,What do you want to talk about?”

,,You never liked me, I’m aware of that, Sect Leader Jiang.”

It would be a lie to say that Wanyin wasn’t mildly surprised by the way the boy responded.. an almost melancholic expression plastered on his face, his tone giving away he wasn’t quite.. as affected by the leaders character at all even though it was just as clear that he respected him.

,,I understand your dislike towards both me and my uncle.. I wanted to apologise for the mess my identity has caused earlier.. and also for everything else. Even though it might not be my fault, those that brought so much pain to you and everyone were still in one way or another my ancestors.. I.. don’t expect you to accept the apology, I just wanted you to hear it, Sect Leader Jiang.”

Sizhui wasn’t all that surprised in all honesty by the fact that the taller one only eyed him suspiciously, his expression hard to read.. or about the fact that apart from playing with Zidian his elder also didn’t reply for quite a while. The truth was, Jiang Cheng didn’t know what to say, think or even do.. he hadn’t expected that to happen whatsoever and after everything that had happened already prior.. it was just a hell of a lot of a mess.

,,How much do you remember?”

,,Oh.. It’s.. hard to say, there are things coming back still at times.. but I do remember that.. I acted rather inappropriate towards you as well.”

,,You had this annoying habit of clinging to random peoples legs.”

Two could play this game, Wanyin thought. If the boy could force him in an awkward position, as childish as it was but the taller one of them had a few cards like that to deal as well - What he couldn’t have known, however, was that Sizhui was mostly as little affected by his ticks as Lan Xichen. With that being said, regardless of a mild awkward blush appearing on the younger ones face, he still replied truthfully and with no shame in sight - even less fear.

,,I only clung to the legs of those I sensed weren’t bad people.”

,,You were wrong about that more than once then.”

,,In some ways, maybe. However, I also wanted to talk to you about A-Ling, Sect Leader Jiang.”

KindThe youngster turned out to be more and more like the troublesome kind that Lan Xichen was as well.. not that Sizhui didn’t somehow spark interest in the senior but.. BUT..

,,What is there that I need to converse about with you?”

,,If you don’t wish to talk to me then it would be fine with me if you would simply listen as well, Sect Leader Jiang.”

It was around at this point that Wanyin knew he shouldn’t have agreed to talk to the Wen remnant, yet.. He did and it would bring too much shame on him to run off and away from a single brat. With that being said, standing there with his expression and aura giving away that he was anything but pleased.. the sect leader went about patting himself down another time as Sizhui let out a soft breath of the sigh kind.

,,I’m not thinking about revenge. Each sect has done wrong and gotten what it deserved.. Eeven if many lost too much for not making a move until it was too late - including yours, Gusu Lan and the Wen’s side branches.. I’m not involving myself with A-Ling for any ulterior motives.. and you might hate me, but we have one thing in common, Sect Leader Jiang.”

,,That would be?”

Wanyin replied coldly after letting out a huff that was.. disrespectful for sure, left the younger one completely unaffected however.

,,We both want the best for A-Ling.”

,,And you claim to know what that is?”

,,No, I’m honestly not having a single idea that seems to come close to the problems solution. Last night,.. I asked A-Ling what he wanted, he as himself not as your nephew, or the future sect leader of.. and he was quite frankly about to break down as he thought of an answer.”

There weren’t many ways to get beneath the Jiang Sect Leaders tough, fake facade.. but both the smaller one and Wanyin himself were aware that his nephew was one of the few ways to get to him - or through to him. It wasn’t different now where Jiang Cheng’s eyes widened minimally in both shock and surprise before he managed to fix his expression back into the wary, warning glare that he had worn the entire time so far. Sizhu’s tone, however, remained steady, mature and calm as he didn't once shy away from keeping the eye contact.

,,We talked about his problems earlier."

,,I'm aware, his mood has changed to the better as well.. but I felt like A-Ling wouldn't be all too honest about the severity of his struggles."

,,Is there one person raised within the Lan Sect that can just get to the point as well?"

Wanyin said, his tone giving away that his patience was running out and that he rolled his eyes further underlined that; not talking about his habit of playing with Zidian. For once however Sizhui chuckled softly.

,,Sect leader, as A-Ling’s friend and his senior.. I kind of understand the pressure that he’s facing.. even though it is rare, it might not be a bad idea to do something unusual in order for A-Ling to feel.. more like he’s not only all of the things he’s expected to be.”

It once again didn’t surprise the smaller one that his senior needed a while to connect the dots.. He was speaking rather cryptically on purpose, aware of Wanyin shutting off if it would seem like he got pushed to do anything by.. him out of all people. After a bit of debating once again the leaders eyes widened minimally before he narrowed his eyes.

,,It is rather obvious that both Lan Qiren and Zewu-Jun had a part in the way you’ve gotten raised. I’ll give you that: You’re intelligent and you know how to talk, other than that friend of yours. If I wouldn’t know it better I would come to the conclusion that the other Jade switched you out with.. what was his name? Lan Jingyi?”

,,I can assure you that I’m the boy from back then, not A-Yi, Sect Leader Jiang.”

,,I will follow shortly. I understood.”

,,Alright, thank you for taking your time to listen, Sect Leader Jiang.”

There wasn’t much more that Wanyin was willing to say and in turn also nothing that Sizhui expected him to say or do either.. even if there were quite a few options that remained, but they were both not that old and things take time. With that being said and a last respectful bow Sizhui turned on his heel and walked back to the others that.. didn’t expect him to come back in one piece and as he did and that also alone their looks were quite priceless.


	192. Chapter 192

Once alone, Wanyin leaned back against one of the many trees that were surrounding him. He was.. frankly speaking, feeling like shit. Honestly, the Jiang Sect leader didn't even know anymore how he kept himself upright.. his body was aching at so many different spots, especially his hips and lower back that had taken more damage from landing on his ass only minutes ago. He was feeling cold and disgusting and the latter in so many more ways than just because of drenched clothing.

There were a few things he knew.. or decided as he reached up, ran his hand over his face and let it linger over the healing cut on his cheek. That with Xichen couldn't go on, not now anyway. He had to concentrate on his nephew,.. and possibly listen to the advice of the Wen remnant that was really nothing else but him "acting out of character". Maybe it was for the best, maybe it would work out or it wouldn't and he'd be forever tainted as an idiot.. but he had to try, right? He couldn't go on always living like that.. if it would only be about him Jiang Cheng wouldn't have cared at all, but that Jin Ling was so affected made him realize more that.. things needed to change.

It had been a long time since the thought had taken over his mind.. but right now he.. couldn't help but wish that anyone would be there. Mother, father, A-Li, it didn't matter.. but that option was long gone. He and A-Ling were alone and it hasn't been a lie when Wanyin told the Lan Sects older Jade that he doesn't want his future to be how his sect had run so far.. nor had it been a lie as he told his nephew that he couldn't forgive A-Li for the ridiculous choice she made.. Everyone had made their everything changing choice a long time ago, now the time had come for Jiang Cheng to make his.

* * *

They weren't overly sure if Wanyin would come back at all.. Or well, that was at least until there was a surprised noise coming from one of them as they then watched in horror as the Lan Sect Leaders feet got pulled away underneath him and he landed on his ass the same way as a certain someone earlier.

Like the many times before, Jiang Cheng now again entered the scene as dramatically as possible as he stepped out from behind a tree, letting Zidian retreat as everyone else looked at him in shock - while some rushed to Xichens side and of course Wangji was not so pleased.

,,Uncle.. What?!”

,,Zewu-Jun.. That was your snowball earlier, wasn’t it?”

The only two it made click for at this point were Sizhui and Xichen, even though the latter was mostly assuming while the Wen remnant questioned the extra-ness of his friends uncle. Meanwhile, as Wangji had helped him up, Xichen “dusted” himself off before admitting in a normal tone that wasn’t giving away anything that had happened between them.

,,It was. However, I must admit that the amount of revenge was.. rather fair, Sect Leader Jiang.”

,,You are mistaken if you believe that that was all.”

Wanyin responded as detached and arrogantly as always.. bending down to the shock of most only to collect a good amount of snow that he then formed into a ball.

,,Three out of 5 of the best bow users have gathered here, are you all just planning to stand there and get hit?”

The purple ball of lightning added as especially the Juniors stood there like lambs facing a wolf - unsure what to do, feeling the need to escape but at the same time being unable to get their limbs to listen. It wasn’t until the smile of the Lan Sect Leader lifted a little further as well and Wei Wuxian bend down while speaking up that the others - excluding Wangji - also regained their senses.

,,Three? You mean four. Three Juniors against us all, isn’t that a bit unfair and against the rules, Zewu-Jun?”

,,It would be against many rules, yet.. This is not an official sect gathering.”

,,Oh, see there, see there.. The Lan Sects many double standards..”

Wei Wuxian responded, cheekily and amused as always while the Lan Sects older Jade only shrugged before bending down to collect some snow again himself.

,,We’re just a group of idiots, no sects attached.”

,,I hope you’re aware that if you throw that one I’m going to throw one back.”

,,Bring it on then if you manage to hit me.”

If it wouldn’t have been as strange and shocking to watch the Lan Sect Leader walk backwards away from Jiang Cheng who approached him dead on with his typical threatening glare while bouncing the snowball up and down in his hand.. Only then the Juniors would’ve probably enjoyed watching their “ship sail”. Right then and there, however, they were all frozen in place as after many times of going back and forth both sect leader threw.. and both hit as well, yet while Xichen could deal with the “loss” Wanyin’s.. fighting spirit really came out.

Before they knew what was going on Wei Wuxian had also joined in and thrown a ball as Wangji to stop him from staring at “their” brothers so intensely as if they were about to cut one anothers throats.. As few ways as there were to get the Lan Sects younger Jades attention, Wei Ying was that one way that would always work and so.. the Juniors stood there as their elders engaged in the snowball fight that rarely left even one of the four untouched.

After a few snowballs were thrown though.. ironically enough both Wanyin and Wuxian came to a hold almost at the same time, each had a ball in their hand as both of their auras darkened somewhat. And while the former Patriarch turned to his adopted son who’s eyes widened instantly, the purple ball of lightning turned to his nephew that was gone out from shock at this point. There was only a small difference: While Sizhui ended up grinning as he picked up a good amount of snow to be able to counterattack.. Rulan tried to escape all sorts of ways while pleading with his uncle, trying to talk some sense back into Wanyin’s head.

,,Uncle.. Uncle, no..”

,,Are you just going to stand there forever?”

,,No, but-”

,,Your mistake.”

Jiang Cheng replied rather coldly, his almond colored eyes that perfectly resembled those of his sister and nephew having this.. glow in them that made it clear he was serious but it was impossible to see if he was having any type of fun or not. At the end Rulan was trapped between a tree and his a few feet away approaching uncle as they had the last bit of a conversation.. yet just as the Jiang Sect Leader lifted his hand to throw the ball.. he got hit in his back himself and out of reflex he turned into the direction the attack had come from and threw his own at them.


	193. Chapter 193

,,Why's it always you for fucks sake?!"

Wanyin said in a matching tone after a few seconds of hesitation. Surely, it had to be THAT Lan kid again that he somehow always ended up having some sort of scene with: Lan Jingyi. The latter was standing there, with a new ball already in his hand and clearly prepared to throw it even straight at the feared Jiang Sect Leader this time.

,,You shouldn't forget to pay attention to your surroundings."

Before the younger leader even managed to turn around entirely into the direction Xichens voice had come from he got already hit by a snowball from it. For once another emotion than rage was visible on Jiang Cheng's face: irritation.

,,I don't even have a weapon right now!"

,,That's your mistake, uncle."

Once again, before he knew what was happening Wanyin had gotten hit again, by then he was being attacked from three sides.. and that was when they had him hooked. He was bad at losing, always had been and he wouldn't go down in shame in such an unfair manner.

,,You wanted it that way."

Was all the Jiang Sect Leader still said before the situation between them turned into a mess that the "Little Lan family" only watched unfold with mixed feelings for a few minutes. That was at least until the youngest crashed backwards into Wei Wuxian and he snapped something at his senior before ducking so that the ball that had been aimed at him and thrown by Jingyi hit the Patriarch.

,,Join or get out of the way."

Well, such thing didn't have to be said twice to both Wei Ying and Sizhui who both joined without completely letting go of some wariness.. Wangji stayed mostly out of it though, apart from the few - many - times his husband purposefully aimed and landed a hit on him. He was.. unsure about whether he liked the situation or not, but again.. things had to move on sooner or later and it wasn't bad to watch his other half behave more like himself again.

* * *

Strangely enough the last three that hadn’t given up or reached their limit after an extended amount of time had passed were Xichen, Wanyin and Rulan.. Sizhui and Jingyi had retreated before their last robes were as dirty as all others and Wangji had stopped once the bit of stamina Wei Wuxian had was drained. Now they were sitting on a tree that had fallen over - not due to them - as they watched how the youngest panted while his uncle.. picked up too much snow, really it wasn’t fair if you keep in mind that the future Jin Sect Leader had already engaged in another snowball fight before the current one started. It wasn’t fair to attack someone who’s hands had probably frozen off at this point.. But did Wanyin care? No, not all that much.

,,Uncle.. please not on my hair.. it won’t dry at all.”

,,It will, eventually.”

,,Come on.. Don’t.. I give up! I said I give up!”

,,No giving up.”

Well, if giving up wouldn’t work in making his uncle stop approaching him.. Flight. Fleeing was his best option, the young one knew and with a quick torn he sped off - running was definitely his strong point, but.. that wasn’t much a surprise keeping his dads habits in mind. What was a bit more of a shocker and a surprise though was that Jiang Cheng.. ran after his nephew, almost full speed and their body shaped dust clouds were still hanging in the air as everyone else watched the spectacle in confusion. Needless to say that everyone - including Xichen who still held onto a snowball - was at a total loss of words.

* * *

,,Stop running already, you brat."

,,Forget it!"

Jiang Cheng rolled his eyes, he was still running after his nephew.. or more walking relatively fast, yet this idiot simply didn't stop no matter what.

,,I threw the damn snow away long ago, now stop or I'll get mad."

There was it, the brief moment of hesitation in the younger ones steps that the in many ways more experienced one needed.. okay, not really but it was definitely more convenient given the state his body was in to close the gap between himself and Jin Ling.

,,Why would you get mad? You should be furious since a while."

Now the older one paused in his steps, looking at his nephew with a in question raised brow.. The future sect leader, however, didn't even look back at him.. since up wasn't necessary anymore - God, had this boy grown a lot.

,,I'm not."

,,How can you not be mad? Have you even listened to everything that got said today?! You should be yelling at me.. or actually break my legs.. or at least be disappointed.. but not running around chasing me, A-Yi and Zewu-Jun with snow.."

,,You want me to yell at you?"

It wasn’t accidental that Wanyin went about phrasing his question that way, his tone of voice parental which he didn’t even take note of anymore while it was simultaneously audible that he’d react to what the other wanted. As Rulan reacted how the Lan Juniors had explained before, gaze flickering about, clinging to the handle of his fathers sword and stuttering barely understandable sentence starters.. Well, the Jiang Sect Leader felt a lump in his throat that he ignored and swallowed down as it made click. It really was a lot worse than what he had guessed, wasn’t it?

,,I don’t know.. I’m at least used to that..”

Well, if that wasn’t a straight hit in the stomach and groin area at once then Jiang Cheng didn’t know what was. To top it all off of course he had to question now as well that.. with how much he already hated himself right now how on earth could Wei Wuxian live with himself still? Reaching up, the Jiang Sect Leader trailed once again over the wound on his cheek before he dropped it and spoke up.

,,I won’t.”

,,Fine, whatever! Why did you even ask what I want if you didn’t plan on doing it anyway?!”

,,I won’t because that isn’t actually what you want, is it?”

To Rulan’s surprise, his uncles voice was calm, one of the calmest tones he had ever heard the other use. It was.. off-putting, shocking, enough for the younger male to look up while wearing a matching expression. Despite just having yelled at Wanyin even his expression and his aura.. were weirdly Lan Xichen like, not as soft and warm but.. too soft and warm for Rulan to be able to cope with it.

,,I’m sorry.”


	194. Chapter 194

,,W-.. What..?”

,,I said that I’m sorry.”

Jiang Cheng replied just as calmly and seriously as before, no room for it being anything but honest.. and it had come so out of nowhere for the future Jin Sect Leader that he once again felt like running or demanding his uncle to hand over Zidian. As it got clearer that his nephew was too paralyzed to speak, Wanyin spoke up again with his tone unchanging.

,,I should’ve paid more attention to you. My behaviour and blindness wasn’t what you needed.. apart from that I might’ve been too harsh. No, I was. The way you’re feeling now is to an extent my fault.”

,,I.. I don’t understand..”

Honestly, the Jiang Sect Leader didn’t quite understand either. Was he thinking at all? Yeh, probably he was thinking about something other than demonic cultivator, Wei Wuxian and self-pity for once. What he was saying was really.. mostly just what he, or at least a part of him, had always wanted to hear and.. well, currently that was the best option he had to fix what he had no idea how to fix. Another truth would be that he wasn’t only clearly scaring Rulan, but also himself.

,,I expected things from you that aren’t necessary and when you didn’t achieve that I.. acted the way I did instead of properly teaching you how to do better.”

,,Uncle.. you’re scaring me.. and apart from that.. you’re just expecting the same from me as you do from yourself, right?”

Well, as frightened and stuttery as the younger one sounded, around as much did it sting for his senior to have that rubbed under his nose because.. why the hell did that actually have to be true? - Letting out a heavy breath, more of a sigh, Wanyin reached up and stroked a few strands of hair out of his face before he continued in the same.. just a tad more drained tone.

,,And that is wrong. The times have changed, everything has.. even the things you’re hunting are nothing in comparison to what we had back then. Either way, I’ve treated you inappropriately.”

,,I.. It’s not like I don’t understand.. you didn’t have a choice either-”

,,I didn’t but you have, A-Ling. You have so many choices you can make and have to make. There’s a difference even though I always acted like there was none.”

He probably shouldn’t be but the future Jin Sect Leader was weirdly enough somewhat glad that his uncle finally raised his voice - a little at least. It made him exhale a breath.. that got stuck on it’s way out halfway through as he watched Wanyin debate.. a rare thing, another emotion Rulan had only seen on his uncles face once so far - at least as far as he could recall -.. and then his soul left his body.

One of the things that had always kept Jiang Cheng remotely sane, as well as going, was.. this one display of genuine care and love from his mother. The one moment he could recall where she hadn’t pulled him around to shove him in his father's face to remind him of his existence. That one moment that tore him apart even though it was really all he ever wanted.. Maybe it was the right choice, maybe it was the wrong one.. Wanyin had been going back and forth with thinking about doing so since the reconciliation with his nephew on the second day of the event.. At the end he stepped forward without even thinking, it just happened and then he had one of his arms already wrapped around Jin Ling while the other brought his head to rest on his shoulder.

,,I’m not good with all of this.. However, you’re a Jiang just as much as you’re a Jin.. if you shall not know anything, be able to decide what you want, you’ll always find a way. Even if I don’t show it, I’m proud of you and whatever you decide you’ll always have a place you can call home.”

That the younger one tensed and didn't reply wasn't much of a surprise to the Jiang Sect Leader.. even he himself didn't know what to do from here. Other than his mother he couldn't dramatically cut the moment short and die, even though a part of him felt like he would. - It took a while for Rulan to react. His mind was completely blank, his eyes stinging as he stood there totally frozen in place.. or well, that was until he regained his senses and somewhat roughly forced himself out of the hug. As soon as that had happened while Wanyin just stood there, the future Jin Sect Leader was half turned away, head hanging low as he spoke in a tone that wasn't quite stable enough for his usual bratty one.

,,I really think you've hit your head once too much! And also you're just saying that now - what if I really decide something that isn't what you expect me to? Or what if I actually start to like A-Yuan?"

Another moment of silence.. it wasn't like Jin Ling was even serious with what he had just said.. and Wanyin also needed a moment to calm his inner demons. Going back to his usual position and tone, back to "normal", was what he felt like was the right thing to do.

,,If that happens I'm going to cut you in half."

Hearing that, Jin Ling flinched before letting out one of those huffs caused by disbelief as he shook his head.

,,What else.”

Wanyin rolled his eyes, how bad they were at communicating was just reaching another level and the disappointed tone of his nephew just proved that. However, just before the younger one of them was about to turn - probably to walk away - the Jiang Sect Leader spoke up again, his tone a little more easy-going and joking like even though the hints were hard to make out and the core of it remained the same as always.

,,I’m going to cut you in half to get you back to the size you belong. Where the hell did you brat grow to?”


	195. Chapter 195

,,I’ve grown so much so I’m able to spot your first grey hair up close.”

,,You damn-..”

,,Maybe I’ll grow some more just so I can tell everyone that you’ve lost height already.”

Well, Rulan had provoked what happened next himself as his uncle had already caught him with an arm around his neck - the purple ball of lightning’s free hand ruffling through the feathers of the baby peacock.. that wasn’t all that pleased with that action at all which he made rather audible, not that it helped in any way, shape or form.

,,Not my hair, not my hair.. I’m sorry, I’m sorry just.. uncle, please-”

,,Don’t you dare begging me to stop after being so rude to your senior. Who do you think wiped your ass just a few days back still. Look at yourself, you’re talking about love and marriage without even noticing that your sleeves have gone too short again.”

Without a word or sign of a warning Jiang Cheng then let the younger one of them drop to the ground as he.. went back to his usual position while staring down at his nephew that looked like a mess with his hair being all over the place as well as - thanks to his efforts - being mostly undone at this point.

,,You’re hopeless.”

Rulan then looked up, just at the right time to witness his uncle fondly shake his head at him for failing at getting the ribbon out of his hair. Before he could say anything though the older one of them had already crouched down behind him to do the task himself.

There were many things the future Jin Sect Leader didn’t dare to ask.. Whether it be about why his uncle always wore his hair up, why he went about bothering each day - sometimes several times during one - to braid a strand.

However.. maybe it wasn’t necessary to know, at least not yet, not all at once. What was important was that they knew they had one another, even if the times where they made it clear were rare. They cared, they had one another.

There were also things that Jin Ling slowly began to realize about his uncle.. That Jiang Cheng had to grow up so much faster than him, that there must be reasons why he was so different to all the other “parents” he had witnessed with their child so far. His uncle was always there, caring in his own way.. And that was another thing Jin Ling began to take in thanks to the trip: Everyone may care, but each in their own way. You may not always take note of it because it isn’t the way you want them to care, yet the chance is high that they still do and you’re just oblivious to it.

,,Uncle..?”

,,What?”

Jiang Cheng mildly snapped back as he - strangely enough - both carefully and gently made sure to tame the ruffled feathers back in place as the future Jin Sect Leader remained silent.. which Rulan did now again as well for a few seconds before he felt a tap on his shoulder that.. neither realized had turned into their own little ritual many years back: the sign for Jin Ling to lift his hand so his uncle could take the ribbon that would’ve otherwise made it all just more complicated.

,,What about you?”

,,Make your own decisions first or I might actually end up with grey hair. Apropo hair, you’re done, let’s get back.”

Due to how quickly he tried.. or successfully ended the conversation about himself the purple ball of lightning didn’t notice that his nephew gave him a worried glance - only to let out a soft sigh before getting up from the ground again himself and fixing his clothing.

They had a long way to go still.. but they walked together, now and figuratively.. and honestly, Jin Ling could’ve suffocated from the feeling it gave him to just think about what would happen if his grumpy uncle would be gone as well.

,,Uncle..”

,,What?”

it hadn’t even sunk in to the younger one that he had automatically followed the other that had began to walk like a little duckling. So full of trust towards the Jiang Sect Leader that he got so lost in thought that he even spoke up before having really thought of how he should say what he wanted to.. and so, for a moment as Wanyin had already turned to face him, he simply stared at the ground. Again, for a moment, before he met his uncles gaze that was unchanging on the surface at least; his tone mature yet hesitant and careful.

,,I will do whatever you ask me to.. I will think carefully, about everything.. I will be honest with you, I will listen to your advice.. all under one condition.”

That one of Jiang Cheng’s brows raised in suspicion while at the same time being a sign that Jin Ling had gotten his attention.. wasn’t anything the boy hadn’t expected, not even that his uncle went about saying what he did next.

,,And that would be?”

,,You have to do the same. You have to find one thing that you want for yourself. Something that.. I don’t know.. makes everything more bearable for you? And no, I won’t accept anything related to the Jiang Sect.”

||One thing I want, huh?||

Jiang Cheng had to admit that while it was a fair condition, it was a shit one to agree to as well. He was just as clueless about what he actually wanted as his nephew and the one thing he had always wanted to do was something he wasn’t ready.. or if he would be, Wei Wuxian wouldn’t talk to him anyway.. Would dog breeding count? He had thought about breeding dogs a few times already..

,,Alright.”

,,You have to promise.”

,,I said alright. I will think about something.”

He could agree to that much, couldn’t he? He just had to come up with something, that couldn’t really be that hard.. even though he knew that he’d probably have little to no time to do anything with “his something” at all at the end. There was too much he had to work on. As his nephew continued to look at him with eyes full of suspicion Wanyin simply turned and continued walking..

* * *

,,Oh, they’re both alive still.”

,,Jingyi, please.”

Would there ever be a moment when out with Jingyi that Xichen didn’t need to sigh, or at least hold them back frequently? He wasn’t too sure, no one was and no one else could deny they felt the same way about the youngest Lan.

,,Why are you all still here, trying to catch a cold so you can slack off?”

,,Just because the Lan talks and acts like a brat constantly doesn’t mean you have to mirror him.”

,,We went out as a group, we should go back as a group as well. Apart from that, Zewu-Jun knows the Nie Sect the best, so in case either of you got lost or injured-”

,,Safety matters.”

Jiang Cheng interrupted the bratty Lan that.. surprise, surprise actually talked normally for once and everyone around them nodded.

,,Well, we’re back, so no need to keep hanging around here in the wet clothes.”

,,Nope.”

Why did Wei Wuxian of all people need to speak up now and so nonchalant as well? Wanyin didn’t know but he glared at his former sworn brother either way.. who went about pointing around between the two sect leader.

,,Jin Ling gave up, but you two are still fighting for the spot of the most endurance technically.”

That was a rather awkward moment after what the younger leader had just done earlier.. yet before Wanyin could even get himself together after his eyes briefly widened because he knew he had fucked up and that it probably would be awkward between him and Xichen now.. the latter already spoke up, in his usual tone - god were those Lan’s capable actor.

,,,I give up. Sect leader Jiang and I would probably take far too long and for the sake and health of all of us.. Let’s head back, the next meal should be served soon.”

,,Do you accept that, uncle?”

,,.. of course.”

Wanyin replied a millisecond too late probably and also without looking at the Lan Sects older Jade or really anyone else. And so, they made their way back for everyone to get changed and ready for the second last meal of the trip.


	196. Chapter 196

On their way back Jiang Cheng was completely silent, his gaze mostly fixed on the ground as he walks behind the group that is getting led from Xichen.

Everything that has happened so far that day and during the trips entirety is running through his mind.. The embarrassing moments, the painful ones, those in between that were both yet more at the same time.

He doesn’t dare to look at the Lan Sects older Jade directly, only glancing up at him every so often.. at the back, the hair and white robes that flutter with each step Xichen takes.

Had he gone too far earlier? Ending it all in front of everyone where it had been so possible yet impossible that they’d be able to overhear it? Should he have been more careful with his words? Properly explained? But what was there to explain?  
It wasn’t like they hadn’t had known the way things would end between them. That everything was a ridiculous, short-lived adventure that would amuse them for a short while but likely damage them for much longer afterwards.

Xichen had only approached him because of that certainty anyway after all.. so did it matter? Should he waste his time thinking about it? If, for what? Well.. maybe for the fact that they would need to keep on living “with” one another for likely the rest of their lives and meet quite frequently if things would develop how they had discussed the other day.

Was he just trying to guilt trip himself with another load? Was it maybe because he already felt like shit that his mind tricked him into thinking that he had fucked up one more thing in his life, even just during that trip and that day? Possible.. but why on earth did all of that matter? It was done and over already anyway, so..

Once they were back at inside the Nie Sect he had briefly overheard the youngest Lan ask his nephew in a half whisper with honest interest.

,,What did your uncle say?”

,,Nothing important.”

Jin Ling had cut it short, he wanted to keep the moment to himself for the time being.. depending on how everything would turn out then he might confide in to his friends - or at least the one it would be of possible importance to: A-Yuan.

,,Zewu-Jun, will you come to the gathering Huaisang asked later?”

Wanyin knew he shouldn’t be eavesdropping, even less be interested in the response.. He had been the one to try and coax Xichen into attending before, for quite the reason and despite him having been the one to just end things he neither wanted to hear his senior say “Yes” or “No”. It made nothing better that Wei Wuxian was the one to ask, giving away with that that they - he and his accessory - were probably planning to go.

,,Just once should be fine! I’ve never seen Zewu-Jun drink before.. on purpose at least.”

,,.. Well.. Alright.”

Of course Lan Xichen would say yes. He was too nice to say no - not that anyone knew why he tried or felt the need to try and mend things with his brother-in-law. Now it was the Jiang Sect Leader that wasn’t sure about whether or not he should attend.. or get drunk in his current state of mind. Who knew, only time could tell as they all separated once Wei Wuxian had said something else that his former sworn brother had decided to blend out.

* * *

Once he had closed the door behind him Xichen walked into his bedroom, already in the process of undoing his drenched and dirty robes. However, as he reached in his bag there were already his stolen goods greeting him.. the purple piercing his eyes and just like them his heart somewhat stung as well.

Nothing about the trip had gone as he had thought, nor how it had been planned. Initially, the Lan Sects older Jade had hoped to find a moment to talk with Nie Huaisang.. He wasn’t too sure about what, yet the guilt of having let down A-Jue because of his blindness and bias towards Jin GuangYao weighed equally as heavily on his shoulders.. as the fact that he had been the one to end the latters life.

Xichen was older, he knew what they both had done wrong.. that maybe he should be the bigger person.. yet he couldn’t get himself to walk up to A-Sang and apologise. Why? Maybe because it would rip back open all the wounds that he barely managed to cover up for long enough to last for the duration of the trip.

Everything was painful, agonizingly so. All the halls and rooms of the Nie Sect brought back memories, good ones tainted in blood and torture..

The only thing that made it endurable, regardless of him being good enough of an actor to cover his misery up, was this strange.. affair with Wanyin.. It clouded his mind, directed it somewhere else, but now.. now that was gone and over as well, like everything else.. another painful wound related to the Nie Sect that Xichen had caused for himself.

Everything was hurting, the only thing left the purple robe of Jiang Cheng and the pain from his backside caused by him being forced down from Zidian earlier. Everything was hurting, Xichen was tired.. so tired.. He just wanted to curl up, go back into seclusion and drown in both self-pity and guilt that were the only two constant companions he had left.

* * *

Neither did Jiang Cheng stay in his room - nor did Xichen curl himself up. They both arrived at the dining hall for their second last meal together with a few minutes apart. At that point everyone else had gathered already at their two pushed together tables..

The only ones missing were still Nie Huaisang and the Ghost General.

,,The trip was over so quickly..”

Jingyi whined, who else should be the first to talk apart from the usual respectful greetings of elders and so forth? However, the emotions about the quickly arriving departure was really.. devided on all ends.

,,What are you going to do next?”

,,Study, Senior Lan almost didn’t allow me to join because I messed up my reports again.”

,,It’s because you don’t practice for a better handwriting, A-Yi.”

The conversation continued from the youngest to the oldest Junior in matching tones to the topics or replies.

,,What does messing up a report in your sect mean?”

,,It already is enough to make a spelling mistake to get a worse total score - and you have to redo it all as well until it fits.”

,,A-Ling, don’t drop your food. It’s really not as bad as it sounds, it’s easy, really.”

Well “A-Ling” regretted having agreed to participate in the Lan Sects one year of study now.. He had gone pale, the food he held between his chopsticks about to drop from how blank his mind had gotten and the way Sizhui tried to reassure him only made it all worse.


	197. Chapter 197

,,I didn’t know there was someone present at this gathering who wears red robes..”

,,Simple, because there is no one like that.”

,,I could swear I saw someone with one for a second outside just now.”

,,Don’t be dumb, no one dares or feels comfortable wearing red robes anymore apart from at weddings because of the Wen’s. Even though the color isn’t officially forbidden the discomfort it brings during a normal day is still too immense - especially for everyone who’s older than us.”

The conversation of the Juniors got interrupted by two young disciples of a smaller sect walking past their table while talking themselves. What the two young men, maybe in their early twenties or younger, said left them all blinking or distorting their faces and brows in confusion.

,,Red robes? Did this guy eat something wrong?”

,,Who knows.”

Wei Wuxian replied and he wasn’t quite the only one who had.. a strange gut feeling that he didn’t quite manage to push away even as he replied casually to Jin Ling’s words.

Only seconds passed before a sudden uproar of a rather familiar voice shouting in a not so typical way caught their attention - possibly confirming the guesses that had left somewhat of a sour or at least bad taste in the mouths of the seniors.

,,Go inside already!”

There was no reply they were able to hear, yet from the youngest to the oldest everyone blinked.. then they exchanged dumbfounded glances before Xichen, Wanyin and Wuxian got up at the same time - for different reasons. While Xichen couldn’t let the relative of his former sworn brother down, Wanyin was somewhat curious and.. honestly in the mood for a fight.. Wuxian, however, rose from his seat because he thought he knew the issue.

,,Who do you think you are? I am the Sect Leader of Qinghe Nie and I’m not going to allow you to go anywhere but inside of this dining hall. I’m not going to allow you to not be seen in those robes after all the trouble I went through to get them prepared and ready in time!”

Well, the Lan and the Jiang groups weren’t the only ones that had gathered by this point to witness the spectacle - or see where it was coming from. However, no one could believe their eyes and ears.. Was that.. the insecure, nothing knowing Headshaker yelling like a fury at the.. at the Ghost General? Without a care in the world or the slightest hint of fear?

,,I shouldn’t.”

,,I swear to the heavens above I’m going to make you go inside and if it’s the last thing I’m going to do! I don’t care if I have to shove you, carry you, throw you or threaten you, you will go inside this dining hall - MY DINING HALL, this instant.”

It sank in that the situation wasn’t a hallucination of some sort for the Lan’s and Jiang’s when Wen Ning spoke up as well - only to get yelled at again by Huaisang who seemed to only grow more furious..

Standing there was.. Wen Ning, dressed in robes that were probably the best fit for him since almost 2 decades. The robes were red, white and golden in color, some but not all that many details on them - probably due to the time pressure. However, it fitted perfectly - nothing was too short, too long or too wide.. and even his hair had been tied back into a ponytail with a color wise matching ribbon.

While the Nie Sect Leader, that was more than 10cm smaller than the General, stood there, red in the face with a glare worse than the best Jiang Cheng could provide with his fan raised in just as much of a threatening manner.. Wen Ning stood there, head hanging low, fiddling with his fingers. If Wei Wuxian wouldn’t know it better that there was no such ritual he would’ve easily been fooled into thinking some sort of soul switch had happened.

,,The people-”

,,They don’t matter. For 5 minutes they’ll have opinions about you then their attention will be already focused on bad-mouthing someone else again.”

,,But..”

And with that Wen Ning had reached the goal he had tried to accomplish from the start. Huaisang turned, even with how small and pretty he was - or how fragile he seemed - there weren’t just a few people that had the momentary hallucination that Huaisang and the memory of Mingjue overlapped for a brief while as he directed s rage now at them.

,,All of you are either guests or residents at my sect, I am the sect leader of Qinghe Nie. If anyone dares to say the wrong word or just look at him the wrong way I won’t hesitate to make use of my position.”

Then he turned back around to face the General and spoke a last order while gesturing with his fan to the door that led inside the dining hall.

,,Now that that is decided, go inside.”

,,Alright.”

Well, now the Nie Sect Leader was just as dumbfounded and at a loss as everyone who had witnessed the strange as anything moment.. Wen Ning responded so casually, turned on his heel and headed straight inside the dining hall without another word being said with the Jiang’s and Lan’s giving him the space to do so in their weirded out states. The people lingered there for a while longer before the first spread to do their jobs and those that remained also went about their lives once Huaisang had walked inside the dining hall.

,,So the headshaker can be like that as well, huh?”

,,Don’t sound as if you’ve made the biggest hunt of history, no one at home is going to believe us.”

The two young guys from minutes ago were at it again, this time beside Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji because the Jiangs and Lans still hadn’t gone back inside yet.

,,You two, I don’t know which sect you are from but as a small lesson: You can never know how much there is to a person, no matter how much you’ve heard about them.”

The boys exchanged a look, bowed and went back inside - followed by the Lans and Jiangs this time -.. probably unwilling to get lectured or scolded on their last day of the trip.. they probably weren’t even aware that the person that had talked to them was the former Yiling Patriarch.

At the end they didn’t get the chance to even ask questions as once they had gone back inside and sat down the Nie Sect Leader already asked for their attention.. and so they sat there, glancing around between Wen Ning who sat as if nothing had happened and Huaisang who stood at the end of the dining hall as the latter began to give his last trip.

Nie Huaisang went on to praise all the “sculptures” that had been made, the.. calm and peaceful way the gathering had proceeded in.. which caused the Lan’s and Jiang’s to feel rather awkward in their skins for so many reasons.. leading to the point where Huaisang explained that anyone who wished to get a reward could come up to him, or write what they wished to get on a piece of paper.. It wasn’t hard to guess for quite a few what most of the young guys would secretly request from the Nie Sect Leader.


	198. Chapter 198

Once the speech was over and the chattering began between eating and the normal noises caused by a 30+ people eating at the same time.. Huaisang came up to them, everyone bowed without being able to hide how puzzled and strange they all felt about.. well, everything as the sect leader sat down at one end of the table beside Wen Ning. A servant came rushing by seconds later to put anything he could need for his meal in front of him.. as the situation turned into awkward silence from all sides.

,,So.. How did you and Wen Ning.. get to know one another?”

Wei Wuxian dared to ask after a while where only Wangji and Wanyin had hesitantly continued to eat in complete silence as if the Nie Sect Leader wasn’t present - who, surprisingly, ate as if it wasn’t.. weird, to say the least. Taking a moment to wipe his mouth, Huaisang took a sip of his tea before replying.. with words that made most of the groups stomach turn, especially that of Wanyin.

,,We met last night.. in a rather unpleasant manner and then we slept together.”

Everything was so silent at once that they were actually able to hear the food climb its way back up into the Jiang Sect Leaders throat who had to cover his mouth with his hand as he stared at his plate in horror. The only one who wasn’t all that weirded out, not meaning he wasn’t at all weirded out, was Wei Wuxian.

,,I apologise, my way of wording was a little.. What I meant was we shared a bed."

,,Oh, just that? Thinking about it, I would be interested to know how "alive" Wen Ning actually is."

,,As if you haven't slept with one of your corpses yet."

Wanyin pressed out in between of trying to force his food to stay in his stomach, it didn't help that Wei Wuxian felt the need to grin and respond in a way only he could dare to.

,,I haven't, that doesn't mean I've never thought about it before though.~"

,,Fucking heavens, I.. I actually feel like I'm going to throw up."

,,Uncle-"

The Jiang Sect Leader was up and gone so fast after that that Jin Ling gave up his try to follow. He only stared at the back of his uncle in worry before giving his.. other "somewhat" uncle a glare yet the former Patriarch only grinned and shrugged.

,,I will look after Sect Leader Jiang, the youth should make sure to eat properly as well as regularly."

Xichen said after watching the youngest ponder about what to do next in his usual tone, maybe a tad sweeter.. which again caused Jin Ling to be too irritated for a brief moment to do anything but look at the Lan Sects older Jade in a matching manner. Wiping his mouth, Xichen got up before bowing and leaving the dining hall.

* * *

,,I thought you might need that.”

It wouldn’t be a lie to say that the Jiang Sect Leader was more than a little surprised that after several minutes of being alone outside to catch some air and calm his stomach.. this melodic, calm and gentle voice of the person he had just dumped like an hour ago was the one he got to hear, right beside him.

Wanyin was leaning with his shoulder against a tree, there was no one apart from them outside and he wasn’t too sure if that was good or bad,, yet as he turned somewhat to look at what the other was holding out to him, he still huffed out a laugh before grabbing the jar of liquor without directly looking at his senior.

,,Liquor on a upset stomach, that’s exactly what I need.”

,,You can’t feel all that bad if you’re still able to talk like that.”

The worry Xichen felt only briefly vanished as the younger one of them glared at him with tense jaw and gritted teeth. It was so adorable to watch the purple ball of lightning be so unaware of how obvious all of his emotions were - probably not for others, but the Jade was more than used to reading 800 emotions through one expression.

,,I must say that.. I also debated about the conversation.”

,,Let’s just.. not talk about that.”

Now it was the Lan Sect Leaders turn to let out a barely audible, yet amused, chuckle. It helped a little at least that either way, maybe because of the last final push he had needed, the slightly smaller male undid the jar and took quite a gulp of it.

,,Are you alright?”

,,In what sense?”

Jiang Cheng wasn’t sure if he replied so sarcastically because of the question being asked after all that had happened that day or simply because he couldn’t believe the other still acted nice and worried towards him. Could that even be genuine or was it farce..? No, it was just Xichen, just how that guy was.. another blow the younger leader directed at himself for ending things the way he did with Xichen.

,,Generally speaking, I should’ve been more clear with my words.”

God was it hard to not snap at the Lan Sect Leader. Snap at him and say that being more clear with his words wasn’t what he was supposed to do right now. Being mad is what he should be. Yelling. Ignoring him, laughing at him, anything but being nice. - For sure the again gritted teeth and almost in pain distorted expression of Wanyin didn’t go unnoticed from the Jade.

,,I’m fine.”

They both knew that Jiang Cheng was only saying that out of stubbornness now, because he couldn’t cope with Xichen’s character.. they both knew just as well that Xichen’s character made most of Jiang Chengs “bad” ticks work on him.

,,If that’s the case then how about you stop furrowing your brows like that and clenching your teeth? Because at this rate you’re going to have a headache and pain in other parts of your face as well.”

,,Whatever, not like it’s your business.”

As sweet, gentle and caring as Xichen was, as harshly did Wanyin snap a reply back at him.. yet just as the younger one of them turned in midst of his speech, ready and about to leave.. Well, the next thing the Jiang Sect Leader knew was that the wrist of his free hand got grabbed somewhat roughly. Less than a second later, in a swift motion, he had been pulled around the tree so they wouldn’t be seen and backed up against the trunk with mention arm pinned above his head.


	199. Chapter 199

,,The fuck do you think you’re doing?!”

The smaller one pressed out between gritted teeth and clenched jaw once he had managed to pull himself together after staring at the Lan Sect Leader wide-eyed and dumb-founded for some seconds. Xichen, however, only kept staring at him.. as if he was either weighing out something in his head - despite the motive being unclear, more than clear was it that he struggled with something in his mind.. Something Wanyin wasn’t used to.

As he got no response, Jiang Cheng began to wiggle.. yet the more he wiggled, the grip around his wrist didn’t actually tighten but it seemed as if the Jade wasn’t struggling the slightest against the amount of strength the Jiang Sect Leader had.

,,You’re not quite running well in your head, are you?!”

,,Probably, but I have told you that before - haven’t I?”

Tilting his head, he furrowed his brows, everything about him being so full of question as he stared up at.. who was supposed to be Lan Xichen, the most perfect, gentle person.. but.. nothing about that man was “that Lan Xichen”. The person that held Wanyin captive right now was talking in an empty, yet strangely enough sad sounding tone. Eyes, a few tads darker than his own and more brown in color than those of Lan Wangji, full of sadness, pain, loneliness.. and the smile.. a smile so tragically beautiful of a man that had, in some ways at least given up on life, that it was breathtaking.. breathtakingly painful, yet beautiful.

For as long as Wanyin stared, Xichen looked back at him without saying a word. Was he waiting for something? If yes, what?

,,A-Cheng..”

What a heartbeat was - the smaller male heart forgot, probably for too long. He couldn’t even breath, so painful did it feel to have his name called out by this version of Xichen.. this empty tone that almost, just almost but so closely made him lose the strength in his fingers to keep holding onto the jar of liquor.. It was horrible, as many things and types of pain he had felt in his life, Wanyin didn’t know how to deal with this type right now - nor did he ever want to have to. In truth, something inside of him ached so badly to let go of the jar and hold onto the Jade, just.. just anything to make him stop talking, stop looking, stop smiling this kind of smile.

There were so many pains Jiang Cheng had felt in his life.. but this one.. this one was just as horrendous and life taking to feel as that he felt as he realised his nephew had no parents left. It wasn’t hard to figure out why this moment and that moment right now felt the same..

Jin Ling hadn’t done a single thing wrong, he was just a baby at the time his parents died for making foolish decisions.. There was nothing Jin Ling had caused for his life to end in the pain and agony it did - It was the same with Xichen, or at least almost. Xichen was a sheltered one, heavens how aware Wanyin was of that.. he was naive, kind and trusting to a fault due to how he grew up.. but lack of life experience, lack of the kind of toughening up that Xichen would’ve needed.. that wasn’t his fault. It wasn’t his fault for trusting who everyone other than Nie Mingjue trusted, it wasn’t his fault for Mingjue to never actually say what had happened so Xichen would’ve known to stay away from Jin GuangYao.. It wasn’t his fault that his soul was too pure, too unblemished for his own good and more than anything the world they had to live in.

Wanyin didn’t even know what to do now.. Should he react how he had treated his nephew earlier..? Or would that only worsen the Lan Sect Leaders state of falling apart and drowning in the pitch black abyss called guilt? There were so many ways to go, all seemed wrong to take.. and so, after far too long of - again - just staring blankly at the taller one without knowing what his own expression had turned into by then Jiang Cheng only snapped a short reply back.

,,What?”

,,Just for the remaining time of the gathering, let me take care of you.. Let me see you, let me know how you feel.”

,,Why should I?”

For the briefest of moments there was the faintest flicker of the Lan Xichen coming through that was.. the old Xichen, probably, not the one he was anymore - maybe not one he could ever be again, now tainted and scarred the same way as Wanyin.

,,A selfish request.” The Lan Sect Leader started, tearing his gaze away from that of the Jiang Sect Leader, up to where his fingers were now asking for allowance to intertwine with those of Wanyin. ,,I have failed so many of those I cherished within this sects walls… A-Jue, A-Sang, in one way or another even..”

Xichen paused, swallowed - likely to not sob, or choke as the pain took him over.. and Wanyin, who had refused to part his fingers until then, got a rather tight hold of the others now, ripping him - a little at least - out of his fragile state that was only growing worse.

,,I cannot bring myself to act blind and deaf, knowing that you are likely feeling unwell within yourself.. I cannot.. I cannot allow myself to ignore someone again, not while I’m around..” It got harder and harder for Xichen to talk fluently at this point, he was a mess.. his palm growing sweaty, his breathing heavier yet his heart.. his heartbeat was really growing erratic. ,,I will have to accept your decision, I will.. just for those few hours, as selfish as it may be..”

What was he supposed to say now? “Don’t hide”? - “Don’t act”? - “Lean on me”?.. Xichen didn’t know.. He had once thought he knew how to be there for someone, how to comfort and be a friend.. a hold, someone those he cherished could lean and rely on.. Now, however, he had no confidence in those few of his social skills left.. and that showed, goodness how it did.

,,I don’t think I will be able to handle my liquor intake overly well today.”

The statement was so odd that the Jade blinked, his head was completely empty as he tried to make rime and reason out of it to the point that he looked at Wanyin who.. regardless of his position, looked as fierce and threatening as always with in provocation raised brows.

,,Apart from that it’s cold outside and I’m either going to be too drunk to or too lazy to start my own fire.”

Xichen now went from blinking too often to staring blankly.. It took him an embarrassingly long time to at least connect a few of the dots the younger leader was throwing around for him. The purple ball of lightning wanted to get drunk.. The Jade wasn’t all that sure why people wanted to get drunk.. but he.. he thought he understood that Wanyin wanted to get spoiled once he was drunk.. or that he was allowing Xichen to take care of him in some ways at least.

,,You don’t want to sleep alone?”

,,I never said such crap.”

The Jiang Sect Leader bluntly snapped back.. a lie, he’d rather die than admit it was one though.


	200. Chapter 200

Well, Jiang Cheng hadn’t expected the next thing to be that the prim and proper Jade beamed from all the joy he felt.. eyes sparkling, smile a little brighter than the nicest one that Xichen usually directed at people.. And.. then he got smooches.. audible, soft smooches all over his face that irritated him so much he was frozen in place even as Xichen had already pressed those.. those damn soft, plump lips against his.

What the younger one of them wasn’t aware of was that.. after he had ultimately given in to the kiss, his body too used to how good Xichen could make him feel inside out - in more than one way -.. his face was tinted in such an adorable shade from pink. The Lan Sect Leader wouldn’t dare say anything, wouldn’t dare to ruin the moment and even less to let anyone else ever know.. but goodness, did the color bring out Wanyin’s eye color.

,,It’s enough. Enough already!”

Xichen had gone back to the smooches because.. the view was just so adorable it melted the dark cloud that was constantly sticking to his side away in an instant.. but without his mouth being preoccupied the purple ball of lightning threatened and even had the audacity to step on his foot to get him to back off.. and so, the Jade did just that - reluctantly, but eventually.

,,How can you act like that where everyone could see it?! Unbelievable.. We need to get back inside.”

,,Just a moment..”

Rolling his eyes at the Lan Sect Leader, even while taking quite the sip of his liquor.. Wanyin had this gut feeling that there was something odd coming, but.. on second thought, that feeling would probably turn into a constant companion now whenever he was around Xichen or anything related to the latter occurred.

,,How is your body?”

There was it again, the pink flush that made the Jade fight against the urge to go back to the smooching hard,.. really, really hard. It left him unaffected that the smaller one glared at him again, despite the obvious blush, while wiping his mouth with his sleeve - Honestly, that had something.. something rough, wild, the prim and proper one couldn’t deny that he liked the look of it.. on Jiang Cheng and Jiang Cheng only, it just.. it just fitted him well, so well.

,,I’m feeling like trash! My body is aching from head to toe, sitting is shit and walking not much better. You can be proud of yourself, oh great and gentle Lan Xichen. Apart from that I’m tired and hungry.”

It made click rather fast that Wanyin was leading him on, trying to make him feel guilty as revenge for having the guts to embarrass him.. Which didn’t mean that Xichen wasn’t worried or feeling guilty, yet it did erase some of the effect it would’ve probably had.. if it wasn’t for Jiang Cheng acting like a bratty maiden, arms crossed in front of his chest, waiting to get.. spoiled, an apology or some sort of expensive gift.. well, at least that was the vibe going out from him.

,,For that you were really enjoying yourself last night and relaxing, Wanyin. You also slept so peacefully and fast, you begin to look a lot more healthy.. I will make sure to treat you well tonight again so you will be calm and relaxed on your way home.”

Two could play this game as - still while talking - the taller one of them already stepped out from behind the tree, making it impossible for the younger leader to really come at him. For a second though, Xichen could’ve sworn he heard the other stomp on the ground but he knew that Wanyin was for sure gritting his teeth and glaring at him. It was nothing more than a little tease back, not that the Jade expected that much or would start anything of this kind himself that night..

And so they walked back inside, only to find that Jin Ling was left alone at the dining table where enough food was still left for 10.. What was slightly odd though was how the now youngest of the three put some fruit in his mouth, chewed, swallowed, then the next, adamant not to look at them.. but maybe they were just imagining things.

,,Where’s the bunch of idiots?”

Wanyin asked once he and Xichen had sat down, a foot apart maybe but definitely still in the “sitting beside one another category”.. his nephew went on to reply, quite normally, after taking a sip of.. probably not tea but as much as he wanted to Wanyin didn’t have the right to forbid an almost adult to drink.. he had forgotten when he had his first cup, didn’t want to remember that he, Wei Wuxian and the others that had died long ago had gotten the liquor through some plan of his former sworn brother.

,,Sect Leader Nie went off to prepare something for the “meeting” you’re going to have later.. When it sounded like it’s going to be liquor and food, you can guess who was the first to jump into action and how the chain continued. Senior Wen.. I honestly don’t know who follows whom at this point.” Jin Ling shrugged, watching how his uncle had to drink some more after a noticeable shudder of disgust went through him. ,,A-Yuan and A-Yi have volunteered to go around with the paper everyone can put their reward requests on.”

,,And why are you here still then?”

,,Someone has to watch over the food.. apart from that A-Yi and I don’t match well over extended periods of time.”

Wanyin couldn’t help but raise a brow in suspicion.. To him, talking himself oblivious to his own behaviours, Jin Ling was like A-Xuan had been.. he blushed easily, got flustered and weird and.. That’s what was going on as soon as he had asked why the youngest was still there. It sounded like some sort of excuse - for once the Jiang Sect Leader actually felt a bit of regret that he didn’t have the strange type of nosiness that Wei Wuxian had.. then he’d probably ask some pushy question this instant.

,,Have you, Sizhui and Jingyi found together again, young master Jin?”

The future Jin Sect Leader flushed an even darker shade of red once the Jade spoke up.. everything about it was getting to him.. this weird combination of just the three of them, the.. strange talk, the kindness and care that came in a wave he couldn’t escape from, the embarrassment of knowing what he did.. and even worse knowing that Lan Xichen, the leader he tried to matchmake his uncle with, knowing about.. whatever was going on between him and the two Lan disciples at least to an extent..

,,I.. well.. I guess..”

As Jin Ling dared to glance up, head down, through his eyelashes. He wanted to disappear so badly because the Lan Sect Leader was really just sitting there.. smiling at him, one so warm and bright and.. just like the sun. He wanted to cleanse him, it had to be some sort of demon or devil inside of Lan Xichen - there was just no way that someone like him could exist without something fishy going on.


	201. Chapter 201

,,What happened still after Sect Leader Jiang and I left?”

Well, Jin Ling flinched so hard when the Jade directed another wave of words at him that he actually crushed the fruit he held between his fingers, turning it into a mess and himself into an idiot - Which, naturally, logically.. obviously, couldn’t be left uncommented by his uncle that spoke up in a tone matching to his words.

,,Could you stop acting like no one taught you how to eat and properly reply to an elder? You’re behaving in a way that’ll hopefully not only leave me ashamed.”

,,I’m sorry..”

,,There’s no need to talk so harshly to young master Jin. I can honestly understand that he’s.. rather tense after what happened between him and two of my sects disciples.”

,,That doesn’t excuse that he lost all his memories about how to dine properly.”

While the youngest felt more and more awkward, unwilling to meat either of his seniors eyes, Xichen couldn’t help but let out a soft breath - not an audible one, he wouldn’t act so disrespectful. Wiping his fingers, while Wanyin glared at the Lan Sect Leader, Jin Ling only dared to reply to Xichen’s initial question as he felt that the latter didn’t stop staring at him.

,,Not all that much happened still.. Wei Wuxian stopped teasing quickly after uncle was gone, even more so when it got clearer that.. Sect Leader Nie didn’t wish for him to be presented like that in front of Senior Wen and..”

,,Please, go on - take your time.~”

The tallest reassured as both he and Jin Ling noticed that the one dressed in purple was already about to snap again.. because his nephew wasn’t only unable to eat properly, now he was some sort of stuttering mess.

,,It didn’t seem like Senior Wen.. understood the meaning of the conversation.. Even though it’s possible he simply acted like he didn’t for obvious reasons.”

,,As little as I want to admit but the few times I’ve met this guy on the Burial Mounds it always sounded like he had more senses in his dead brain left than Wei Wuxian.”

Wanyin admitted coldly, with venom in his tone as he then went about drowning his insides in more liquor. Neither the Jade nor Jin Ling really could disagree with him.

,,Nothing much happened after that. We ate, Sect Leader Nie explained a few of the dishes that were provided, the liquor that is most commonly drank here. A few people stared, some whispered a few things but no one really dared to say a word.”

Jin Ling shrugged, looking more like the bored boy that he had likely been for once despite his rather mature way or wording.

,,A-Ling!”

A voice yelled, that of the younger Lan - Lan Jingyi - and.. the future Jin Sect Leader got up so fast that the table the sect leader were still dining at actually moved somewhat.. yet as quick as Wanyin was to snap and glare, a tad quicker was Jin Ling to bow and run.. Leaving his uncle closing his eyes, trying to stay calm and put while Xichen honestly found the liveliness somewhat amusing.

* * *

,,You saved me.”

,,That bad?”

,,You don’t want to know.”

Jin Ling panted out as he leaned with his back against the wall beside the entrance of the dining hall. It wasn’t only Jingyi, Sizhui was also standing there silently.

,,What happened? You went out looking for your uncle because you were worried and to notify him that we're helping out Sect Leader Nie.."

,,I.. I think I caught them.."

,,W-.. How - What do you mean?"

Sizhui brought out with a bit of a struggle once it had made click for both him and the other Lan. With how their friend looked, a little pale and rattled, it sparked both: their interest and worry.

,,It only seemed logical to look for them outside.. I didn't even take three steps out and already heard my uncle say "Enough, enough".."

,,And then?"

,,Nothing! I ran back inside."

Jingyi, who had tried to coax the youngest to say more let out a disappointed noise that only caused Jin Ling to glare at him and snap something back.

,,It's one thing to bring them together, another hearing them.. hearing them.. oh heavens.."

,,It's okay A-Ling.. A-Yi, stop pushing."

As reassuringly and softly Sizhui was towards the future Jin Sect Leader, even going as far as to gently rub his shoulder - as harsh was he towards his fellow Sect member that promptly lifted his hands to look as innocent as he thought he was.

,,It's still not a real confirmation for anything.."

,,They already came back a minute later, together, my uncle had the jar in his hand that Zewu-Jun took with him."

,,Either way, let's go and continue the paperwork."

The older Lan said, noticing that by then Jin Ling was trying to close off the topic for now with desperation. Jingyi only gave in reluctantly, yet eventually he nodded and they went off.

As guessed, most really wanted nothing but the special books. Only 2, the two that had kept popping up since a while asked for something else. One wanted a coat for his mother, the other some toys for his siblings.. they didn't look overly poor, but their sect was small one no one had even heard of out of the three of the well known sects. The few girls had formed a group, some trying to charm them yet only Jingyi really felt the effect and they asked for things like make-up, jewellery.. Only one jokingly threw out to let hers be a marriage proposal but she then also settled for something more appropriate - Which didn't mean that Jingyi wasn't willing to be part of her first wish.

* * *

,,What are we going to do now?"

Jingyi asked once they had finished their round and gotten to know to simply put the papers on a table that had gotten prepared for their elders.

,,How about we get into a different corner of the hall, drink and think about our own rewards?" He then added as the faces of his friends were blank question marks.

,,I'm in for the drinking and sitting around but I've got no need for the reward."

,,I also don't really feel too comfortable taking a reward."

The stares then turned to Jingyi, who.. hadn't really thought about not taking a reward he had earned but was now left feeling too pressured to do so. At the end he agreed, with displeasure being both audible and visible.

,,I got it, I got it. How about we ask those guys if they need anything else?"

,,That sounds good to me."

,,I've got enough money so why waste the reward if someone else can need it."

And so they went back to the guys that gladly took the opportunity - They seemed nice enough that the trio even asked if they would be interested in partaking in the Lan/Jiang Sects year of study.. not without making sure that they couldn't say anything for certain, both sides at that. After that the trio gathered at the opposite end of the dining hall while their seniors slowly but surely gathered at their own table.


	202. Chapter 202

,,I didn’t expect you both to show up.”

Wei Wuxian said after this.. really strange, somewhat unhealthy and weirdly threatening get together had formed. Huaisang didn’t quite know where to sit, so he ended up squeezing himself in the tiniest spot beside Wen Ning - Wei Wuxian sat there, initially with one leg over that of his husband but as Xichen and Wanyin arrived.. he, out of reflex, changed his position without quite understanding why himself.

While Xichen smiled at him, with the faintest hint of awkwardness in his eyes, Wanyin.. glared, of course, and didn’t say a word as he instead went about grabbing the first best jar of liquor to.. say without saying anything at all out loud that he was pretty much just there for the alcohol.

,,Uncle, when are we going to depart tomorrow?”

Jin Ling asked in a forced steady tone, meeting his uncles gaze once Wanyin looked up at him - the youngest was standing a foot behind the small gap that had formed between the two married ones.

,,I’m not quite sure yet, why?”

,,J-Just asking…”

,,If I may add that you can tell Sizhui and Jingyi that we won't depart before lunch."

,,Brother-"

Xichen cut Wangjis try to speak up short with raising his hand and smiling even more reassuringly and sweetly at.. at Jin Ling who only went a deeper and darker shade of red before quickly bowing and.. well, it could be called running away with how he rushed to get back to the other end of the dining hall.

,,So lively, it's refreshing."

,,They are young after all."

As innocent of a thing it had been to say.. from both Huaisang and the former Yiling Patriarch.. it only took so long before a realization hit all of them.. They.. were getting old.

,,Ahem.. Anyway, how are things supposed to proceed in case the study at Yunmeng and Gusu will be allowed?”

Not like anyone was overly interested in this gathering to turn sect matter related.. but everything was tense, to no ones surprise.. and really, that seemed like the best topic option to take for the time being. After taking a sip of his tea, Xichen gladly took the topic Wei Wuxian threw out and ran with it.

,,I intend to alter a few of the rules.”

Gasps, coming from Huaisang and Wuxian followed while Wanyin and Wangji both furrowed their brows.. The Jiang Sect Leader had already known some bits and pieces, but so far everything he and the older Jade had talked about was when they were drunk and.. it was a difference to have it made so “official”, putting further pressure on him - purposefully or not - to act on his own promising speech as well. Wangji.. was simply suspicious and surprised, even though not all that much of the latter.

,,Which rules? Please tell me that we can get up later in the morning, Zewu-Jun!”

Okay,.. everyone other than Wei Wuxian was getting old - he was still pretty much the same, which the other 4 got reminded of yet again with that overjoyed statement.

,,I intend to change both the times when we rise as well as the time when studies start. Not much, but a little at least - it will all, however, only be temporary to see whether or not this will lead to better results. The rules won’t be forced, so if someone wishes to live by the old ones, they are free to do so.”

,,Those Juniors nowadays are so lucky..”

,,Says the one that never finished his studies. You should be forced to study with all of the brats.”

Most watched how the Patriarchs face distorted in horror after the Jiang Sect Leader spoke up both harsh- and coldly.. to worsen it all for Wuxian, Xichen looked as if he was thinking for a few seconds before speaking up in the same tone as always.

,,This might not even be such a bad idea. Young master Wei, you have never completed your studies and it might be helpful for both you yourself and your relationship to our uncle if you would show more interest.. or willingness to grow.”

The chuckle Wanyin let out after that as they all watched how Wuxian’s jaw worked and his complexion paled was so dark and sadistic that Wangji threw a warning glance at him.. not that the purple ball of lightning was fazed by that at all as he stared over the edge of his cup right back at the Lan Sects younger Jade.

,,If that’s how you all are going to be then Huaisang and Jia-.. Sect Leader Jiang should have to join as well.”

,,I would, actually..”

The Patriarch looked as if he had gotten struck by actual lightning right in the brain, that’s how dumbfounded he was by the fact that the Nie Sect Leader out of all people admitted that.. hesitantly, in a tone that was almost shy, but he did.

After staring like that with his jaw dropped for a few seconds Wuxians head snapped over to stare at his former sworn brother almost desperately.. but before he could close and re-open his mouth to argue Xichen already spoke up.

,,Sect Leader Jiang has been an extraordinary student after you had to leave early, young master Wei.”

,, Extraordinary?!”

,,What’s there so surprising to hear? You were the one that didn’t take this study year serious from the start.”

Well.. fair enough, he hadn’t - Wuxian had to admit that, but.. but..

,,Lan Zhan..”

God had he grown into one embarrassing pathetic individual.. tugging on his husbands sleeve, pleading puppy eyes - waiting to get rescued by his one and only.. just that there was a tad more of seriousness in the core of Wangji’s eyes that made Wuxian drop his head in defeat before he whined out.

,,You as well?”

,,Mn.”

,,Fine. FINE! I will try, but only if Nie Huaisang joins and you get the allowance for me being the dark arts teacher, Zewu-Jun!”

,,Alright.”

Xichen replied so quickly, fully ignoring the fact that it was highly unlikely he would actually get that allowance. His tone so sure, in contrary to Wuxian’s complete and utter despair. After glancing at Huaisang, who just shrugged before putting down his fan to have a bit of “adult tea” himself, Xichen then nodded.

,,So it’s decided.”

Somehow.. Wuxian felt like he had already lost that gamble. Honestly, Wangji didn’t think it was all that necessary, just like Xichen, for his other half to repeat his studies.. but if it could bring the family closer together, maybe benefit his husband in one way or another.. why not try? It would also fill the Lan Sects younger Jade with a certain feeling of joy to see Wuxian be more seriously interested in his sect.

,,What about Wen Ning? We’re all talking about studies and the old times but he’s completely left out.”

The silence that spread after the Patriarch pointed that out weighed heavily on all of them for several reasons.. No one really knew what to say, do, where to even look.

,,It’s alright, I have my duties.”

,,Duties?”

Xichen repeated that word that also caught the attention of Wangji and Wanyin. As Wen Ning didn’t seem to be able - or willing - to explain Wuxian did so for him.. not overly hesitantly, but more carefully with his words than he usually would be while he couldn’t entirely hide that he was a little proud.

,,He has found a village near Gusu where mostly the old or widowed people live. He helps them out, gains money from it but mostly they just give him something in return like fixing his clothing.”


	203. Chapter 203

It took a lot of jaw clenching and teeth gritting for Wanyin to not let out a disgusted noise… The Ghost General trying to redeem himself with a few such actions? On the other hand, as much as he loved to hate and push blame - there was the point Huaisang made, that mostly it was his former sworn brother’s fault and that he had been the one to use.. maybe even abuse the General for his deeds. It is, was and would remain a sick, twisted misery.

,,I’m afraid that even with the different behaviour young master Wen is showing now and despite who’s fault his actions were.. I won’t be able to persuade the elders into allowing him to enter the Lan Sect for study purposes.”

The former Patriarch was just about to turn to his.. well, one could but couldn’t really call it friend to say that he’d think of something - or at least that he was sorry, but the Nie Sect Leader already beat him to taking action. Huaisang had reached out, squeezing the Generals hand that was resting on the table as he spoke in a cheerful like tone.

,,It’s not fair that you never got to show off the way everyone else did.. Well, not me, but I’m going to try and attend the studies so I can give you all the information.”

,,Sizhui could help as well.. as far as he has time because….”

There was no need for Wuxian to explain, it was enough for him to point at the other end of the hall.. the timing was perfect, the oldest - Sizhui - was just separating the other two that were at each others throats.. yet again. Some of the seniors shook their heads, others rolled their eyes,..

,,I.. I would be willing to go over what younger master Wen studies to see his results.. As long as it remains a secret, of course.”

,,There’s no need to go through so much trouble, Zewu-Jun.. I’m fine with how things are now.”

Wen Ning replied, his awkwardness coming through as he rushed to do so as well as to bow to show the respect and thankfulness he couldn’t make audible. It was.. a little sad to witness, Xichen couldn’t completely deny that and it showed in the belated smile that appeared on his fine facial features and the just as belated nod.

,,Does anyone else feel like those two will be a problematic combination at the Cloud Recesses..?”

Even from that far away it wasn’t hard to notice that Jin Ling and Jingyi.. were about to eat one another up, and that not in a sexual sense.. This time it was Huaisang who couldn’t refrain from hesitantly breaking the silence, mumbling behind his fan that he lifted before his face whenever he wasn’t drinking - which he did, like Wei Wuxian and Wanyin rather fast and excessively.

The Jiang Sect Leader that had just been in the process of bringing his cup up to his lips paused, looked over, drank and slammed it on the table - causing the Junior group to freeze before they all sat back down in an instant without daring to make another move. After that, as Xichen let out a soft, inaudible breath Wanyin spoke up.. his Yunmeng dialect coming slowly out more.

,,It this brat really a Lan?”

,,I haven’t dared to ask yet but I can’t deny I am wondering about that as well.”

Huaisang admitted and as Xichen let his gaze wander.. Wen Ning didn’t dare meet his eyes and Wuxian whistled to act out that he was also not so innocent in his mind about Jingyi’s secret heritage. They only got more suspicious though because instead of instantly replying the Lan Sects older Jade first went about taking a sip of his tea while looking rather lost in thought.

,,Lan Jingyi has his name and Cloud patterned ribbon rightfully.. even though his complete heritage is a mystery." - ,,However, I would like to ask you to refrain from asking further questions and from speculating. Even more so from treating Jingyi differently."

Xichen quickly but patiently added as both Huaisang and Wuxian were already taking a deep breath to likely ask something he couldn't give them a reply to either way.

,,As long as I live in Gusu now, I've never met his mother."

,,Since she refrains from opening up about who the father of Jingyi is.. it was hard to persuade the elders into letting her off so easily. She is a wonderful, talented cultivator and person and I believed she had a good reason so I helped her."

Wei Wuxian at that point didn't have to ask more, he had.. to an extent at least heard about the parents of the twin Jades and so he could easily understand how challenging that must've been. It was surprising they had allowed her to keep Jingyi by herself, keeping in mind how strict the Lans were when it came to children out of wedlock, sex before marriage alone.

,,He's not a bad guy but I feel like he'd easily go through as a runaway of Yunmeng Jiang."

As ironic as it was for Wanyin to say so himself.. they all couldn't disagree with it. The next to speak up though was Huaisang, as most went on to drink or have a snack.

,,He’s a lot like my brother when he was younger.. as far as I can recall..”

,,As if Chifeng-Zun had an affair in the Cloud Recesses without ever claiming his child.”

Even Wanyin couldn’t help but snort and reply with a chuckle mixed in - one that sounded bitter, but most of his laughs sounded like that. The Nie Sect Leader, however, was just as fast at snapping something back that made the purple ball of lightning almost spit out his drink.

,,Well, judging by character he could just as well be yours.”

,,Do you know how old I was at the time? And how busy I was?”

,,Who says you’ve got endurance to make it a long moment?”

,,You fucking headshaker! Better watch your mouth or-”

,,Or what?~”

The Jiang Sect Leader let out a growl like noise, almost breaking the cup he held in his hand because.. He had never been great at handling the overflowing sexual and flirty energy of both Huaisang and Wuxian. Huaisang smirking so smugly at him wasn’t making Wanyin feel any less uncomfortable.

,,Huaisang, you won't have any luck with him."

Wei Wuxian speaks up, sounding a little under the influence by then himself as he slowly but surely begins to scoot closer to his husband again. Huaisang blinks in confusion, only Wanyin glares without it having any effect.. meanwhile, Xichens interest had been tickled awake and Wen Ning as well as Lan Zhan were.. not all that curious.

,,What do you mean?"


	204. Chapter 204

Now it was Wei Wuxian's turn to chuckle, rolling his eyes before leaning his weight onto his arms that were resting on the table to be able to look at Huaisang.

,,Sect Leader Jiang has never shown interest in those matters, if you're able to recall. He has his list but he's not the type to go up to anyone, so.."

,,Ah! I remember now, THE LIST!"

The two Jades took note of the fact that the Jiang Sect Leader grew agitated enough regardless of feigning ignorance with gritted teeth as one of his only tells at that moment in time turned out to be the few sparks Zidian let out.

Honestly, Wanyin hoped that if he would act like all of what could.. more than likely would come next didn't bother him.. that maybe then those two jerks would leave it be and lose the thrill of mischief they felt right now.

Plot twist: They didn't lose the spark, it only lingered and hesitated for a moment before Huaisang closed his fan and tapped with it on the palm of his free hand. Both, his and the former Patriarchs expression.. dark, uncomfortably promising.

For sure, after minutes of waiting for a reaction from the Jiang Sect Leader.. the two troublemaker still turned to the three they thought would be most “catched” by the “news”.. However, as much as Wen Ning itched to tell them that there had been an addition made to the list that he knew of thanks to the Juniors.. he remained silent, Wangji looked even more bored.. and Xichen was too good of an actor to make it noticeable how interested he actually was.

It was almost.. as if all the things that had in fact happened were forgotten from most in one way or another - at least for a short while, a refreshing yet tragically short while. Wei Wuxian and the Nie Sect Leader couldn’t even refrain from letting out rather honest, heartfelt laughter. To stop the mood from going south again, the former Patriarch then spoke up again after drowning the.. who knew how many cups he had had at this point - Wangji did, it were too many.

,,So, Huaisang, you won’t have luck with charming him. He’ll die a virgin.”

,,I don’t wanna brag with it but other than you I got it done before dying.”

Wanyin threw in, his tone cold and detached even though.. as pathetic as it was, it gave him this feeling in his gut.. having won over Wei Wuxian at something, something the latter thought he’d never have.. it was a damn good feeling.

,,He countered your attack and landed the final blow, A-Xian!~”

The Nie Sect Leader cheered, fanning himself at a faster pace as he fought against the urge to act too childishly. It mostly went unnoticed that despite Wei Wuxian snapping something back fast, mostly forgetting about the torn bond he had with Jiang Cheng as well as that it was all about his death and the tragedies his decisions had caused.. his eyes were watery, lips quivering and hands shaking - He was so.. so happy that in whatever which way his baby brother had overcome his hatred towards letting anyone close at some point in his life to experience something that great.

,,Anyone can claim that! Jiang Cheng doesn’t like losing, especially not against me. So..”

The weirdest of things were visibly running through the former Patriarchs mind as he chewed on his lower lip before eventually starting to grin.

,,Is she someone we know?~”

,,I don’t know why I should talk with you out of all people about that.”

,,That sounds like a yes, A-Xian.”

Huaisang almost yelled, having reached quite a good state of drunkenness now and the other troublemaker that stared at Wanyin with squinted eyes all intensely also nodded, but slowly.. hesitantly.

,,So.. if we know her.. do we know her well?”

,,No.”

Even though the Jiang Sect Leader sticked to cold and short replies, it wasn’t really a lie.. neither did anyone seemingly know Xichen well, nor was he a she and so forth.. Why he was even taking part in his own humiliation? Wanyin neither wanted to think about it nor would he admit anything to himself no matter how true the reason he’d come up with might be.

,,What about you, Huaisang?"

,,M-Me..?"

Wei Wuxian interrupted his former friends try to push for more answers from Wanyin - causing him to get a more threatening than questioning glance from the latter while the Nie Sect Leader replied with a stutter and slight high pitched tone.

,,Yes, you. Do you have someone you fancy?~~"

It got more and more clear that the former Patriarch was in his element and would probably only run more out of control the longer the gathering continued. Huaisang was now fanning himself like mad, clearly more than awkward and as little as the Jiang Sect Leader wanted to admit it he enjoyed that it was someone else's turn to suffer now.

,,I.. I do-"

,,I don't know does neither count nor work.~"

,,Well.. maybe.. but nothing as serious as with you and Hanguang-Jun."

The way Wei Wuxian blushed was for most not half as cute as for Wangji but it didn't go unnoticed that something was generally.. rather off about them. They weren't half as clingy as usually and not "all in your face" with their overflowing hormones and love.

,,You still look as young and pretty as 15 plus years ago so I don't think you need to worry just yet. If I managed to find someone and even Jiang Cheng got it done then.."

,,W-What about you, A-Ning, did you ever.. like someone?"

Wen Ning and Xichen had sat there listening in silence for quite a while now - just that the latter was at least able to have a bit of tea while the General didn’t quite know what to do with himself. It surprised Wen Ning as Huaisang directed the speech towards him, so much that he ended up staring at the Sect Leader for a few seconds too long more than likely before he went back to staring down at his hands.

,,There is nothing to talk about.. when it comes to me.”

The General said with a break in his words and most - not the Jiang Sect Leader - felt at least a little bad for him.. or maybe not for that version of Wen Ning but his alive self.

,,The only person I had was my sister.. I’m used to not be liked or.. or close to anyone.”

It somehow made click for them all now that they were.. minus Xichen, a group of people that really.. no one but their siblings actually seemed to have ever liked, or if once then not anymore. What a sad little round they were.


	205. Chapter 205

,,You.. You had A-Xian..”

The Nie Sect Leader tried to sound as positive as possible.. yet he had already needed far too long to say that for it to really work and he didn’t.. to be fair, Huaisang couldn’t have known that that was just another dark rabbit hole that lead to nothing nice and colorful. Wei Wuxian felt instantly awkward, the urge to drink the liquor in his cup had also vanished just as quickly as he simply stared down at it while waiting for whatever would come next.

,,Young Master Wei.. He was the only person who was nice to me.. It was only one time, we were never friends.. Our relationship is a lot more complicated..”

Honestly, while most felt weirded out.. the former Patriarch couldn’t blame Wen Ning for being unable to explain what they had been. It was nothing, yet something, a lot in between and even more complications that - hopefully - no one would ever get to know. It was a time Wei Wuxian wanted to run from, act as if it never happened, but it was also a time he had shared with Wen Ning and at this rate only Wen Ning was left of that time.

Topic change.. A topic change was what they desperately needed now and everyone was hyper aware of that yet for a few minutes at least unable to find something to pick up on.

It wasn’t until Xichen picked up a fresh cup, filled it with liquor and took the tiniest of sips that everyone’s attention suddenly snapped towards him - Everyone was staring, Wanyin not so much, but Wei Wuxians stare was for that even more intense. It was clear that the biggest prankster of them all was waiting for something.. However, at the end the Lan Sects older Jade simply placed his cup down and smiled the angelic one that always framed his face with just a tiny hint of amusement shimmering in his eyes.

,,You appear to be waiting for something, young master Wei.”

In truth he was waiting for something so desperately and tensely that he had began to bop his leg up and down without even realising - Only when Xichen spoke did Wuxian notice and stop, a pout ultimately appearing on his lips.

,,Last time you were behaving just as oddly as Lan Zhan when you were drunk.”

,,I had neither eaten before consuming liquor nor did I know it was liquor in the first place - which made me drink the contents of my cup carelessly in one sip. I can drink, if I’m careful.”

Shit, how much he craved to snap at the Lan Sect Leader about who exactly was the one to tell him to do all of that.. Instead Wanyin rolled his eyes while drinking more without anyone noticing - anyone but Xichen, who knew perfectly fine how the other must feel right then and there.

,,You’re drunk even more chaotic than Huaisang and I together, Zewu-Jun.”

The soul wise youngest teased, completely ignoring how his husband placed a hand on his thigh to likely get him to slow down - whether that was towards the drinking or talking or both.. Wei Ying didn’t care much. Clearing his throat, Xichen replied in a bit of a stiff tone.

,,Both my brother and I are aware that we don’t behave the best when we had something to drink.”

How ironic was it that out of all people present Wen Ning and the Jiang Sect Leader let out a noise at the same time - even though most eyes flickered over and got fixed on the General who then looked up.

,,I’m sorry.”

,,There’s no need to apologise, Lan Zhan does behave rudely whenever he’s drunk towards you.”

,,A-Ying.”

Was it the first time that Wangji spoke up since they had sat down together? Possibly, not even the younger Jades other half was too sure as he looked at Wangji who had.. this tone in his voice, the one he used whenever he tried to stop the former Patriarch from doing something. While Huaisang looked simply extremely confused, however, Wanyin raised a brow - the aura around him a little more dark, a tad more unwelcoming - and Xichen.. well, the Lan Sect Leader was between shocked, worried and suspicious.

,,May I be allowed to ask what young master Wei is talking about, Wangji?”

,,Nothing.”

Wangji replied fast, his voice cold as ice and his gaze only to his brother visible minimally conflicted.

,,Lan Zhan attacks Wen Ning like a child whenever he’s drunk.”

,,Well, he doesn’t need to be drunk to leave bruises all over your body.”

As casually as Wei Wuxian had tried to sound, as cold and arrogantly did Wanyin leave a statement - his mouth working faster than his brain and within the second he had finished his sentence the air around them grew tense. Tense, overwhelmingly so.. more than anything the glares the Jiang Sect Leader and Wangji threw at one another.

,,We’re working on-”

,,You have no idea how it is with that size!”

Wei Wuxian who had just put an arm in front of his husband to make sure no further damage would be dealt as he tried to reduce what had already been done with stating that they were working on those issues.. Well, it wasn’t only his head that flung around into the direction that the yelling had come from - the general area the Juniors were sitting at and the one to raise his voice was of course Jin Ling.

Even with the worst of sights, they were still all able to see that both of the young Lans had reached out - likely to cover their friends mouth because it.. for sure wasn’t intended to be such a well audible statement.

While neither Huaisang nor Wuxian could refrain from chuckling as it took a few seconds before they all turned back around.. well, as they did.. Wanyin was sitting there, an elbow propped up on the table with his forehead resting in his hand. It wasn’t hard to make out that he was having some sort of a crisis, it was just.. why? And also, it was Jiang Cheng, just about to rip out Wangji’s throat so..

,,What below the heavens was that?”

,,We might need to limit their liquor access soon.”

The Nie Sect Leader and Wei Wuxian tried to go on as normally as possible.. but as Wanyin still didn't change his position after seconds and lastly minutes they were all giving one another looks - with those of the former Patriarch ultimately getting stuck on Xichen. Not that Wei Wuxian knew of the affair, but he could still somewhat - even thought faintly - recall that Jiang Cheng had always treated the Jade kindly.


	206. Chapter 206

,,Sect Leader Jiang.. is it possible that your reaction is related to what young master Jin just said?”

Xichen then asked after spending a bit of time acting as if he was oblivious to the fact that all but Wanyin’s eyes were glued on him. The response came, not with words but.. the Jiang Sect Leader reaching out to grab a jar of liquor, opening it and.. likely chugging it almost entirely down.. It wasn’t hard to guess that that was more than a simple confirmation.

,,Is he crying about his height? It’s not a bad height though..”

,,Clothing measurements maybe..”

,,He’s not that broad nor that poor to worry about something like that.”

Wei Wuxian argued, Huaisang who had been the other to talk half lost in thought shrugged - silently agreeing.

,,He has a problem with his build.”

Ah, there they had him - with enough lures to tick him off, Wanyin finally gave in.. it was just weird that his tone sounded almost pained - no need to mention the confused look most gave him.

,,I’ve never noticed that something is off with Jin Lings health so far.. You, Lan Zhan?”

,,There’s nothing wrong with his health, it’s just a part of his body that makes a pain of an embarrassing trouble whenever he needs new clothes of all kind.”

The Jiang Sect Leader hissed, too quickly for the younger Jade to even have a chance to shake his head - One of the last things Wanyin wanted was Wangji mentally dissecting his nephews anatomy. Most were busy running things through their mind, even Wangji did his part - still taking note of the fact that in one way or another Jin Ling was his husbands family - yet.. It wasn’t until the oldest of them all tried to hide his little laugh behind his fist with making it sound like a cough that.. they decided in silence no one but the Lan Sect Leader and Wanyin himself had a clue.

,,There are good tailors for such troubles in Gusu.”

Xichen equally as sweetly as innocently threw that in and.. Wanyin wanted to choke him, not violently but.. that guy and his nephew, call it paranoia but he could feel his hair grow grey.

,,I wasn’t trying to imply that the tailor in Yunmeng are bad, they. are. not.”

The Jiang Sect Leader pressed out between gritted teeth - and the older Jade really had the audacity snicker at him behind his liquor cup.. Scratching the choking from the list for now, he would get his revenge and take the prim and proper one as hard as he liked next time - embarrassment from fast releases and what not all be damned.

,,Oh, Sect Leader Jiang, it was in no way my intention to make you think I’d try to imply something like that. It’s just that.. sometimes such things are more easily done in another area - We all have our secrets after all, don’t we?”

This provocative little shit of a prim and proper Jade.. If Wanyin hadn’t been slightly red in the face by then from all the liquor he had drank so far he’d have a pretty damn hard explaining why this statements was causing his face to flush.

,,Don’t you think so as well, Wangji?”

,,Mn.”

For most it sounded like the younger Lan was.. quite bored, yet his hum came instantly so he was at least listening and then finally did Wei Wuxian’s face light up, eyes went wide and within a brief moment there was the most smug, proud uncle smile playing on his lips as he.. spoke up in a tone that was a little creepy but not too much.

,,,Oh, now I understand.”

,,I think I do as well.”

Huaisang added, tapping with his closed fan on the palm of his hand - his expression almost proud. Did he fear for his life on the inside because he had likely.. or his books had likely triggered something? Yes, but acting on it would get him to face Zidian even faster so..

,,Is it extreme?”

,,That’s not your concern.”

,,Mmh.. Lan Zhan, should I give them some tips?”

,,I swear on all my ancestors, Wei Wuxian, if you dare tell him any of your crap about sex yoau’re going to be another head shorter.””

Wanyin kept snapping something back - the last words he said more growled than anything as Wei Wuxian’s expression for a brief second seemed to drop. As always that didn’t last long, however, because just as fast after he had propped his elbow up on the table, rested his chin in his palm and stared in his liquor cup that he played with.

,,I might’ve lost a few inches all over, but I’d still be able to give him better advice than you when it comes to cut sleeve things.”

,,No matter the advice, coming from you it can’t be a good one.”

The Jiang Sect Leader argued after needing a second to calm the feeling that gobbled him down on the inside - nowadays it would be called gay panic, but whatever you may call it… Wanyin sure as hell didn’t like it.

* * *

,,The youths over there talking about the finest of things in life over a cup of liquor.. It’s making me reminisce about the times in Gusu all those years back.”

The tone in which the Nie Sect Leader spoke was full of melancholy, it was a time where.. everything existed still, when everything was still nice and somewhat cozy - familiar, save… The others couldn’t disagree, even though no one wanted to fully agree with Huaisang either.

,,Just that we never shared a bed with one another."

Wei Ying argued behind the cup he held before his lips, taking a sip of it afterwards with a grin playing on his lips.

,,We did a lot of other things for that."

The argument went back and forth like that just that this time the former Patriarch broke into a belated yet heartfelt fit of laughter.. that left most confused - not Wanyin, he just wanted to faint at this point, no matter how embarrassing that would be.

,,If you are hesitating to talk openly because I'm present then I can assure you that I will behave as if I never heard anything. Not that anyone would dare and ask me apart from our uncle."

Out of the Gusu trio not a single one didn't have this awkward feeling.. That like they were all 15 again and the Jade's had caught them doing something.. They couldn't drown out that it sounded like some trick.. no matter how sweetly Xichen smiled at them - which only made the honesty behind his statement even harder to believe.


	207. Chapter 207

,,It’s just that..”

,,Please, go on.”

The nicer Xichen got, the more horrible the former Gusu trio felt. This time it had been Wei Wuxian who spoke up, likely the Lan Sects older Jade was one of the only people that could bring out some sort of an awkward side of his.

,,I wasn’t that old yet either at the time, so I might understand.”

,,I never asked how old you are.. or were, I just noticed that, Zewu-Jun.”

,,You’re married to that one since so long and you haven’t even talked about his brother once?”

The tone in which Wanyin spoke by then was giving away that he had reached a good level of drunkenness and his Yunmeng dialect was only making him sound more threatening than usually. However, the Lan Sect Leader lifted his hand, trying to act as if all of that left him unaffected.. but neither he nor anyone else felt that way, yet simultaneously Xichen didn’t want to excuse anything with bringing up the seclusion time he didn’t wish to talk about either.

,,I'm a little more than 2 years older as Wangji."

In doubt, interrupt the two fighting ones as if nothing had happened - a strategy Xichen had grown good at using over the years he spend with Mingjue and Yao. It worked, a little at least and really Wei Wuxian was the only one that looked surprised that the older Jade wasn't all that much older.

,,Oh, that's surprising.. You were always so mature, calm and kind.."

,,You're flattering me, young master Wei, but I grew up strictly raised to be the next Sect leader from early on."

Xichen said after letting out a soft chuckle like noise - one that would haunt Jiang Cheng in lonely times more than likely - and briefly lowering his gaze. Wei Wuxian wasn't attentive enough to question that.. if the older Jade had been raised from Qiren to be a perfect leader like him.. why did he turn out so different in character?

,,Even if I may not be able to respond as all of you, there's no need to restrain your wish to converse how you would if I wouldn't be present."

Before anyone was able to respond there was noise coming from the other end of the dining hall - laughter, heartfelt one at that, to be more precise. Naturally, the attention of all seniors turned towards the Junior trio.. and they caught them leaving together, each a jar of liquor in his hand with their ways of walking giving away they had a drink too much.

,,There were a few times actually where we three were as drunk as them. Huaisang had a endless amount of explicit books that we studied more than we probably ever studied anything."

Wei Wuxian began the tale, in a tone that was.. sounding quite similar to being lost in thought - travelling back to a time where each of them was themselves still and everything right in his mind.. Not that he was the only one who's mind played that trick on because Huaisang then let out a sound of confirmation in form of a "Aah!".

,,You always got the liquor and for that Sect Leader Jiang and I took turns to be on watch."

,,Once I was done I'd try to push Sect Leader Jiang to go next but in the end it was always you because he acted like he didn't care."

The former Patriarch continued where Huaisang left off and once he had finished his sentence they both broke into a short fit of laughter while Wanyin didn’t appear to be overly interested.. maybe he was about to fall asleep as well or had already with his eyes open, they couldn’t tell.

,,If I may ask.. Why did you take turns to keep watch?”

,,Mh? Oh, we didn’t want anyone to catch us while we were.. taking care of ourselves.”

It was and would probably remain awkward to talk with the Lan Sects older Jade about such topics.. yet after Wei Ying explained, to the surprise of most said Lan let out a soft, short chuckle before reaching for his cup and taking another tiny sip of liquor.

,,If you would’ve obeyed the rules more then our uncle wouldn’t have barged into your chambers at such times. Right, Wangji?”

,,Mn.”

Two out of the former Gusu Trio needed a few seconds to connect the dots. Xichen had said before that he couldn’t talk the same way as them, yet he was still.. being honest and trying to be as normal of a person as he could be. Of course, once it had made click, Wei Wuxian spoke in this proud, somewhat dirty tone after letting out a “Oho~” like sound.

,,Zewu-Jun, Zewu-Jun.. if that isn’t a huge scandal..~” And after a few seconds he continued. ,,Come to think of it, that reminds me of that one time where we three debated about whether or not the Lan Sects two Jades have the same urges as we do.”

,,We?! Watch your mouth, Wei Wuxian.”

For the first time in forever the Jiang Sect Leader had something to add to the conversation. His tone was full of warning yet honestly.. he had trouble recalling something like that had ever happened, not that he thought he had taken actual part in something inappropriate but.. As guessed - and hoped -, however, his former sworn brother was quick at lifting his hands and adding in a hurry.

,,,Okay, okay.. it was more Huaisang and me. Jiang Cheng was too boring to be a part of the conversation.”

,,I can assure you that we are both a lot more normal than most might wish to believe and see.”

Somehow.. Wei Wuxian began to feel so bad that after that time of the Lan Sect Leader speaking ever so calmly, sweetly and politely.. he just couldn’t shut his trap anymore, starting to blurt out what he had tried not to for a couple of minutes at this point.

,,Well.. You see.. At that particular night, we debated about.. About how and if the two Jades would be in bed.. but we were completely wrong about Lan Zhan and we never told anyone else about it all..”

Well, that was something both Jades had to let sink in and process - the older one couldn’t even hide that fact all too well initially but.. he was a man as well and who knew.. maybe, just maybe he could gain something off of playing along with the opportunities that spread out in front of him.

First, however, Xichen’s gaze averted to..

,,Has A-Sang fallen asleep, young master Wen?”

,,I.. Yes…"

Wen Ning replied with a pause yet without daring to move. The Nie Sect Leader had leaned against him not even that long ago and had fallen asleep a lot faster for that. It was somewhat odd to see, just as odd for Wen Ning himself that it even happened but.. what could anyone do really? While Wanyin shook his head, letting out a sound of disgust Wei Wuxian was once more left feeling guilty.

,,How about you bring A-Sang to his chambers?"

Nodding after the encouraging words of the Lan Sect Leader, Wen Ning carefully and gently shook the other a little. Huaisang stirred, let out a displeased noise but apart from fixing his position he didn't seem to even wake up really.

,,Sect Leader Nie-"

,,No."

Huaisang threw in in a sleepy tone that was just as pouty - leaving the others confused yet despite being mostly gone out the Nie Sect Leader said more a few seconds later.

,,I told you.. not to call me like that.."

,,I.. I apologise.. but.. A-.. A-Sang, you will put your health at risk if you sleep here.."

,,Just carry me."

Well, Wanyin felt once again like the contents of his stomach wanted to find their way back out - causing him to drink even more in hopes he'd lose his eyesight or hearing.. or better both. The others were meanwhile just as irritated, yet.. like demanded from the spoiled one, trying his best to ignore the stares of the others.. Wen Ning extra carefully went about picking Huaisang up before excusing himself and the latter as well as disappearing into the night.


	208. XiCheng | 95

It was around the time when Wen Ning called the Nie Sect Leader so critically intimately that Wanyin.. decided acting as if he fell asleep was a good idea - He just wanted to blend everything out at this point and due to all the workouts at day as well as night during the trip.. exhaustion, age and liquor were all getting to him.

That said, putting his elbow on the table the purple ball of lighting rested his cheek in his palm and closed his eyes. Despite that.. he couldn't quite relax, a bad gut feeling kept lingering somehow.

And Wanyin should be right, because promptly after the two "whatever" - as he added the blank in his mind - had left.. the older Jade cleared his throat. Xichen surely couldn't just let the topic from before slide, having gotten a bit of an idea on how he could use all of that to his advantage.

,,So, if I may be allowed to ask for a more elaborate explanation as to what you thought of Wangji and me, young master Wei."

,,Huh? Why?"

Wei Wuxian was too oblivious and still far too sure of himself to realize he should be feeling awkward or panicked by now. Beside him, his silent other half was taking a sip of his tea before joining in as well in the cornering of the oh so feared Patriarch.

,,Tell."

,,Wangji, you should be a little more elaborate with your words as well." The Lan Sect Leader threw in, his tone ever so gentle, calm and sweet. ,,It would be of use for us to know how outsiders view us - especially since I'm thinking about applying new rules, or altered ones."

,,New rules?-"

Before the technically youngest of the four could go on to properly whine Xichen had already lifted his hand in a reassuring manner - and in true twin Jades manner Wangji said what his brother didn't get the chance to.

,,Why should brother tell you, if you don't tell him what he wishes to hear?"

,,Why should I talk to you if you never properly reply, Lan Zhan?"

The only one to notice that Wanyin also tensed as Wei Wuxian spoke those words faster than anyone could think or wrap their head around the situation was Xichen - Of which one leg was almost pressed against that of the Jiang Sect Leader.

They were all trapped in a state of shock for maybe a minute - Even if the younger Lan's expression didn't give anything away.. it was a confirmation, however, for something that almost everyone had gathered by then but no one dared to say out loud: They had issues; and they only went worse, gradually, by now.

* * *

,,The mention of rules did include a few new ones - yet mostly they are milder ones of those that already exist. Studies starting later in the morning, such matters."

As after minutes neither of the husbands had given a sign of wanting to clear up the situation that was going on between them the older Lan spoke up again. To the surprise of most Wei Wuxian jumped on the opportunity to drop the needed conversation with his other half almost instantly.. or well, instantly after taking quite a large sip of liquor.

,,At the time, I said that I didn’t believe Lan Zhan had any type of such interests.. I was completely wrong though, so..”

Honestly, it was clear that at this point they were running towards the unavoidable end of them separating.. just that Xichen wanted to tease the one that acted like he had passed out beside him. It was all somewhat awkward and stiff, even the chuckle the former Patriarch let out.

,,Wangji was always good at hiding how he feels.. as well as communicating. Either way, young master Wei, you’ve mentioned before that there was a part of the discussion about me as well?”

,,I.. There was, but knowing what I do about Lan Zhan now.. I don’t feel all too comfortable with what we said at the time..”

The oldest of the round minimally widened his eyes, then his gentle like smile grew only a tad bigger as he spoke up again.

,,You have changed to the better, young master Wei.. Or.. You’ve matured.”

Was that it? The problem that kept lingering between Wangji and him? The statement came so unexpectedly, but it got the - technically - youngest ones mind to run wild with thoughts.. yet he wasn’t the only one who began to think. However, Wei Wuxian didn’t want to think about that, those weren’t matters he liked - hence anything serious, anything that could bring up things he was desperately trying to act as if they never happened or were in the past.

,,Back then, Huaisang and I debated about.. Your interest but also.. which role you would have if it would be a special kind like that of me and Lan Zhan..”

,,I see.”

,,It was nothing bad! I promise..”

,,I didn’t accuse you of anything, right?”

The Lan Sect Leader quite frankly had a bit of fun teasing his brother-in-law. It wasn’t hard to notice that Wei Wuxian was a lot more fidgety and nervous about “Zewu-Jun” than he was about confessing to thinking “badly” about his other half. It was likely the smile, this sun like smile that radiated as much warmth as Lan Xichen himself but god.. the Yiling Patriarch felt so dirty right then and there - which was the older Jades plan and it worked out pretty perfectly because Wei Wuxian went on to explain..

,,It was the entire opposite of what we thought of Lan Zhan, really..! Huaisang was the one who said most, but what he said was nothing bad.. Just..”

,,Please, go on.”

,,Well.. No one would think you’re the type for random affairs, Zewu-Jun.. and maybe Huaisang was completely mistaken like I was with Lan Zhan, but.. It was nothing but talking about that you would likely be overly gentle, caring,..”

,,I see…”

They all knew that no one was buying the mischief creator of all mischief creator saying that was all but with how the Jiang Sect Leaders leg kept tensing Xichen decided it was good enough. With that in mind, drinking the last bit of his cup of liquor, the older Jade looked over to the younger leader before speaking up again.

,,I think it may be best if we delay the conversation to another day. It seems like not everyone is able to handle their liquor so well today.”

Just as he turned his head, Xichen as still able to see the sad shimmer momentarily appear in the former Patriarchs eyes.. Not that it was surprising, even if he knew that the “asleep” one was actually just acting he was aware that Wanyin was still able to frown as hard as always in his sleep.

,,I’ll help Sect Leader Jiang to his room, so if you may excuse us. I hope you’re going to rest well before our departure tomorrow.”

While Wangji did nothing more then let out one of his hums, the other half of the duo worked his jaw as if he debated to say something but instead he also just bowed. And so, while the married ones saw themselves out, Xichen kept the act going with shaking the “asleep” one slightly who sat back up all stiffly while letting his hand drop onto the table.

Wei Wuxian had given his former sworn brother a last worried glance over the shoulder.. yet he ultimately made the decision to leave with Wangji - once again.


	209. XiCheng | 96

,,How are you feeling?”

,,Drunk.. Fucking drunk to be more clear..”

Wanyin responded in between of a groan, causing the older one of them to chuckle softly.

,,With each day more that I drink in a row it gets worse.. I’m getting old.”

,,Oh, don’t say that.. If you are already old because of not being able to handle liquor as frequently anymore then what would that make me out to be?”

The Jades reply came a little more easy-going like, he wasn’t all that serious but also not drunk enough for his usual shenanigans in an actually drunk state. By then he had already gotten up from the ground and was watching the other try to get up as well… at second glance though, the purple ball of lightning was really.. already quite under the influence and half the amount of liquor he had drank probably wasn’t even working in his system yet.

,,May I?”

,,After what you’ve just done? No.”

,,So stubborn..”

After already having gotten nothing but a cold shoulder from the Jiang Sect Leader as he tried to help the latter walk until his feet would be willing to listen again - Xichen was now also getting glared at in a warning manner. However, taking a quick look around there was really no one left and so the taller male dared to take a step closer to the other, whispering in his ear while not so accidentally brushing his lips against it.

,,I just wished to see how you would react.. I may be mistaken, yet your body language is rather clear, A-Cheng..”

,,You damn.. Forget it.”

Wanyin snapped out.. but not without tensing first as well as his breath getting stuck halfway in. How he hated the fact that the Lan Sect Leader knew perfectly fine it didn’t take more than the slight hints for his imagination to have run haywire a long time ago. And with how badly the alcohol was slowly starting to affect him.. that couldn’t go all that well.

Xichen catched himself licking over his lips as he saw the blush on the others face minimally darken while Wanyin had already turned away without actually leaving or stepping back.

,,How about we go to your room? I told them I would get you there safely.”

,,If you want me to be safe you shouldn’t accompany me to my room.”

The Jiang Sect Leader bluntly gave back before rolling his eyes and beginning to stagger off.. Xichen watched for a few moments before closing the gap in a few fast, wide yet elegant steps while keeping an appropriate amount of distance between them.

* * *

,,Do you think they’ll make it?”

By the time the younger one of them spoke up they had walked half of the way to said ones room - It took a second or two for Xichen to understand, then he carefully thought of how to reply before doing so in a serious tone.

,,I’m unsure.. Young Master Wei is only maturing mentally now.. his age isn’t far above that of Sizhui and Jingyi.. meanwhile,, I’m quite certain that Wangji has matured and changed as far as he can given his age..”

,,I think that idiot only now begins to realize that since he is back the past isn’t gone and away. It’s as present as he is, needs to be dealt with and not pushed aside. And your brother, that brat, has gotten far too spoiled by no one pushing him to communicate.”

,,It may be partially my fault.. that Wangji has turned out this way. Ever since we were young, I understood him without words.. I should’ve made it more clear he has to talk and not rely on the imagination that everyone will be able to understand him like that.”

,,They were both fools if they believed everything wouldn’t come crashing down on them one day. Wei Wuxian is a playful, risky asshole that can’t stop talking. It won’t always be good enough for a guy like him to talk all by himself.”

,,You may be right..”

Xichen wasn’t only aware that he would ruin his own mood if he kept the conversation going but it also didn’t go unnoticed that the smaller one of them grew a lot more bitter the more he said. It was.. strangely understandable, just as much as it wasn’t their place to talk about the married couples affairs. They were both adults and, really, it was their jobs to make it all work out in the end.

* * *

,,What are you wishing to do now?"

,,Don't know, take a bath - I guess."

They had entered the younger ones room after making sure that no one was around to see. While Xichen rather naturally went to prepare tea, Wanyin put his sword aside and got rid of his outer robe.

,,How about we take one later together, A-Cheng?"

,,Why would I agree to that?"

Jiang Cheng said sarcastically after letting out a huffed laugh. To his surprise though the Jade was rather quick to react and somewhat smooth at the same time.. because a moment later Xichen had already cornered him, bodies close, arms wrapped around his middle from behind. Honestly, the Jiang Sect Leader had barely noticed the other move, which didn’t make it all that much less creepy.

,,Because I don’t think you wish to take a bath only to do so again a bit later.. that is if you don’t want me to join you, Wanyin.~”

God, how much the younger one of them wished that his body wouldn’t react to each single touch, even the most faint of said, because it remembered everything far too well - also that it felt all too well. It did though and Wanyin had to try his hardest to tense instead of lean back and relax against the other while his heart pounded away in his chest and his breathing grew all shaky and embarrassing.

Before he was even able to get over the rush of adrenaline and comfort though.. Xichen had already pulled away again - humming a slow yet upbeat little tone as he went back to the tea that was almost ready with help of a talisman.

The Lan Sect Leader had a bit of a hard time to force his facial muscles to not distort into a grin or smirk.. He knew how to tease and treat the other quite a bit now and it had worked. It clearly had worked, which only got proven further by the growl the smaller male let out before retreating without saying another word. Xichen could see the glare that Wanyin had thrown at him far too vividly in his mind.


	210. XiCheng | 97

Giving it a few minutes maybe.. There was a part of the Jade that debated.. Debated if he was himself around the Jiang Sect Leader or not.. He was outgoing, provocative, made the first steps rather often.. maybe he was himself.. no, he was himself - or more a bit of this new, unexplored, self or his mixed with all the things that he had learned to drown about himself due to his sects many rules.

It felt refreshing - yet scary.. either way, he found himself heading inside the bathroom where he heard the other before even realising it. He felt alive, for the first time in a long time - alive for himself, not his sect, his brother, just as he himself..

* * *

,,Are you purposefully avoiding to use a talisman to heat the water?”

,,And if?”

Xichen bumped in at a time where the Jiang Sect Leader was pouring more water into the tub.. Seeing the possibilities, the taller one of them surely used his chance. Stepping closer, then behind the other, the Jade slung his arms around the one that automatically growled out some words in a displeasured tone.

,,The heck are you planning?”

,,Why do you think I’m planning something? I’m simply afraid you might feel cold.. only dressed in such thin, open clothing..”

Wanyin didn’t even have the time to say anything as the large, gentle and warm hands of the taller one of them already began to fiddle with his night robe.. that had until then been anything but “open”. Naturally, as if he was some scared rabbit facing a fox or hawk he tensed - all too amusing to witness for Xichen who trailed with his fingertips a few teasing lines over his lovers toned abdomen. here and there a little further south but never to the area in the south that they both knew perfectly had awoken a little not that long ago.

,,My attire was perfectly fine until a certain someone felt the need to change that. Now get your fingers off of me."

,,What if I don't wish to obey your request?"

,,I'll throw you in the water and notify someone about how shameless of a person you actually are."

It wasn't on purpose but before Xichen could stop himself he had already burried his face into the others nape, tightened the hug around said grumpy one and.. chuckled - okay, it was more a soft little laugh. Nevertheless, of course, the purple ball of lightning was anything but pleased with that as well.. but too shocked for a moment to even snap anything back.

In truth though.. the younger leader wasn't sure if he didn't make use of a fire talisman because he - or at least a part of him - guessed that it would be a waste to warm up the water now if neither of them was going to make it into it in time.

Xichen was just in the process of letting his hand travel a little closer to the smaller males private region as all of their short lived fun got interrupted by a knock on the door. Letting out a sigh, the Jade pressed a soft kiss on the back of the Jiang Sect Leaders head before excusing himself - The gesture left Wanyin embarrassed as hell behind with a face redder than the most ripe of tomatoes.

* * *

The person that stood behind the door was someone the Lan Sect Leader didn't quite expect to show up and said one also seemed unsure about whether or not he should be present: Wei Wuxian.

,,Young Master Wei, can I help you somehow?"

,,Oh.. It's just... I was taking a walk after having and argument with Lan Zhan.. or.. it's the equivalent of having an argument with myself since he doesn't really talk.."

,,I see.."

As little either of them wanted it, it was audible that the older Jade wasn't all that surprised - shocked, yes.. but not surprised. After a moment of standing there in awkward silence the taller one of them spoke up again - guessing that Wanyin was eavesdropping already.

,,Is there anything you wish to talk to me about? Or would you maybe like it if I would talk to Wangji?”

,,Oh, no - I was just.. I wanted to see if you had trouble bringing J-.. Sect Leader Jiang to his room.”

There wasn’t a single of the three that didn’t know those words were a lie, yet.. What would speaking the truth really change - given how things had turned out? Pushing those feelings aside, Xichen put on his “Elder” smile and spoke in his usual tone.

,,I helped Sect Leader Jiang to his room, now I’m preparing a few things in case he will awaken and need something.”

For a brief second doubt could be spotted in the eyes of a stranger possessed by Wei Wuxian’s soul.. yet the latter left it at that and simply nodded - a little too slowly, further proving his suspicion.. but he had been oblivious to his own romance, so it wasn’t really all that different now either.

,,What are you planning to do now, Young Master Wei?”

,,I will go for a bit more of a walk and then return to our room, I guess.. Well then, I hope you’ll have a good night, Zewu-Jun.”

With that they both bowed, one further than the other.. yet as he was already in the process of turning away to leave Wei Wuxian stopped…. turned back around, at least halfway and spoke up again in a tone as if he just remembered something.

,,Zewu-Jun.. Jiang Cheng has always.. looked up to you, not that there was anyone really who didn’t.. But, thank you for looking after him. He seems to have a soft spot for you since a long time.. Just so you know though, he had a habit of walking off when drunk - that didn’t happen too often, but it did.”

,,I will keep that in mind.. And, young Master Wei: Wangji will need more time to adjust, if I could ask you to.. be patient, yet open.”

They were both equally as surprised by the others statement, yet all the younger one did still was nod before turning back around and walking off. Xichen watched for a few seconds still before he also shut the door again and turned.. only to spot a anything but pleased looking Jiang Sect Leader in the door frame.


	211. XiCheng | 98

,,A-Cheng?”

Instead of getting a reply, once a minute or so had passed with them doing nothing more than staring at one another, the younger one of them turned and headed back to the bathroom area. Xichen wasn’t sure what was going on, there were too many options and he didn’t want to spend too much time trying to solve a riddle while he could just ask for the right answer.

,,I don’t think young master Wei had bad intentions.”

Even though that was the most plausible reason for the younger ones odd behaviour - the reply the Lan Sect Leader got was a dark chuckle as he watched how the other now suddenly did proceed to use a talisman to warm up the water. Just as he was about to open his mouth to just ask directly what the problem was, however, Wanyin already spoke up in a more pissed version of his usual tone.. a lot more sarcasm in it as well.

,,He’s not my problem.”

,,Then enlighten me and tell me what is..”

Xichen tried it this time with closing a bit of the physical gap that was between them but also with speaking in an even more calming yet determinded tone.

,,If you plan to go to “your brother” then just go.”

,,He-.. Wangji is my brother, of course I would be worried-”

,,Don’t fuck with me, Huan.”

At this rate the Jade was just standing there, jaw more or less dropped as by then the raging ball of lightning had turned around. Both Wanyin’s expression and tone were threateningly serious and bitter, voice almost a little too far raised. Shockingly, as there was no reply coming from him it only seemed to tick the younger leader off more.

,,You are his brother, damn right. BUT: Do you always plan to show up whenever he is unable to live his own damn life? He is old enough to clean up a mess after himself without you always having to put yourself in the middle of it - even worse covering things up for him, making excuses for his behaviour that is just as shit as my own.”

,,I.. I don’t know what you’re trying to say..”

,,Don’t even try to play the oblivious one here. Whatever he isn’t good at, you’re doing it for him. He’s a fucking spoiled child that no one has ever expected to grow on his own. You can’t always help him - He has to help himself. You can never know when you’re going to be gone and do you want him to be like that and ruin his entire life?”

,,I just.. I think that if I would just.. tell him that he needs to stop relying on others to talk for him, all of that..”

,,For what, Huan? Have you ever not been screwed over by getting too involved in the lives of those around you?”

Xichen was cornered, he couldn’t even be upset about what the younger one was saying because whether he wanted to admit it or not.. most wasn’t a lie at all, maybe overdone because of Wanyins agitation but.. not a lie. After the last part silence spread again before the Jade made the mistake to speak up again.. and this time, the Jiang Sect Leader only shook his head, turned away and said his last few words in a dangerousy low tone.. almost sounding disappointed, done.

,,I just want to help him.”

,,Where was he when you needed him? At the temple he simply left, rather fucking Wei Wuxian than taking care of his brother. It doesn’t matter how hard you screwed up - other than him you were always there for this guy, weren’t ya? Everything he has is mostly thanks to you, you should give yourself more credit and start caring about yourself as much as he doesn’t.”

Jiang Cheng waited for a while without turning around and as no reply came from the Lan Sect Leader he said a few more words. Those in turn caused Xichen to completely avert his gaze and ultimately leave the room - while the younger one thought he’d leave entirely, the Jade wasn’t even sure if he wanted to leave the bathroom..

,,If you want to fix his life for him again, then go.. but I’m done with that and I’m done with him being able to live an easy life with everyone always doing whatever he’s not skilled at for him. Everyone is so blinded by how perfect he supposedly is, but in truth he’s not any better than anyone else.”

* * *

It took a few moments before the younger leader even realised he had held his breath - after exhaling, he only began to feel more shit. He was drunk, he had a temper, he was quite pissed and done with Lan Wangji.. but now he had fucked up and all he could do really was beat himself up about it mentally.

Honestly, as immature as it was and may sound: He really wished he could just let his mood out on something but frankly speaking.. hadn’t he just done that anyway?

A while had to pass before Wanyin managed to swallow his wrongly placed pride down enough to at least go and look if the other was still there. To his surprise the Jade was sitting in the middle of the lower end of the bed, staring blankly at nothing or at least something he wasn’t able to see.

The steps of the younger one of them came to a hold in the door frame.. His gaze flickering about, fingers of his left hand playing with Zidian on his right,.. Wanyin wasn’t good at communicating himself - even less given the base that he felt bad for acting the way he did, something even more unusual and rare.

,,You don’t need to be so hesitant, I may dislike to admit yet there’s truth behind your words. Also, I know how you are, so such a reaction is nothing I wouldn’t expect..”

Xichen’s tone was rough in sound, low in volume and only towards the end did he look up to meet the others gaze. There was the typical smile playing on his lips, despite it not fully reaching his eyes… the tragically beautiful kind of smile that with everything combining still made Wanyin’s face go red and him tense.


	212. XiCheng | 99

,,Still wasn't my place to talk like that.”

The Jiang Sect Leader admitted after averting his gaze and several seconds had passed. His tone was only sounding worse and worse, his level of intoxication seemingly rising even more after his sudden outburst.. regardless, however, Xichen patted on a free spot on his left that Wanyin then hesitantly moved towards and sat down on.

,,I recognise that what you were saying is what you had to learn the harsh way yourself, A-Cheng.”

The younger one couldn’t possibly get drunk enough to not scold himself on the inside for tensing too obviously at that - a confirmation, a display of it being painful to be reminded of; Xichen also took note of that.. Due to that he wasn’t all that surprised that the tsundere was the one trying to play oblivious now.

,,I don’t know what you’re talking about - even if I would know, this is not about me.”

,,We are both in such similar situations, there’s no need to seperate conversations like that.”

The Lan Sect Leader had turned his head a while ago already so he could read the expressions of his lover - Now, however, just mentioned ones head snapped into his direction, a death glare getting directed at him. Really, for someone who was wielding a lightning weapon, Jiang Cheng had such explosive fire in his soul it was equally as entertaining as it was worrying.

,,I already wanted to choke you earlier, Lan Xichen, you shall better be more careful with your words.”

,,Mh? Why?"

It wouldn't be surprising if one day Wanyin would actually awaken the ability to shoot lightning bolts with his eyes or if he'd lose most - to all - of his teeth due to gritting them too hard.. and that probably because of this little innocent, oblivious act of his lover that he couldn't tell was fake or just the best of it's kind.

The base would likely be similar to the current one with the taller males brows slightly raised to further underline how surprised and clueless he was - tone startled yet innocent.. Let’s just say that the next thing that happened was Wanyin reached.. or well, he tried to reach over but whether that was to strangle the Jade or just to give him a little slap..

Despite his efforts though the intoxication wasn’t only making him weaker but also slower and even if that wouldn’t be the case it wasn’t a hard task at all for Xichen to get a hold of the younger ones wrist. Naturally, Wanyin glared even harder and tensed while the Jade without even realizing put on quite the seductive expression before speaking in a tone to match - a little low, soft yet rough in sound.

,,You don’t really wish to compete in your current state, do you?”

,,In my state?!”

,,It wouldn’t be fair of me to engage in a fight with you while you’re that intoxicated.”

The Jiang Sect Leaders gaze flickered about for a few moments, making it even more noticeable that said one was trying to think of something he could snap back at the other.. yet nothing seemed overly appealing and so he decided to just forcefully bring his wrist back into his own possession before saying a word.

,,If that already would not be fair and against your rules then you should refrain from anything else as well.”

,,I’m afraid I cannot do that.. because I wasn’t forced to break my sects rules yet our plan worked out how you intended.~”

,,Which means?”

Xichen couldn’t help but let out a soft chuckle - it was too adorable how oblivious his lover could be, given the right set of circumstances - and so.. Instead of replying instantly, the Lan Sect Leader slightly turned, leaned closer to Wanyin’s ear and.. slyly placed one of his hands on the younger ones thigh, not too close nor too far from certain areas he had a bit of knowledge about by then.

Being too drunk to completely put up a tough facade.. the purple ball of lightning tensed, yet his body wasn’t listening enough to move or even fight against the bright red flush of color that took over his face. - For one of them it was delicious, for the other just another hint of how hell would probably be. Finally, Wanyin did manage a faint try of fighting back - if he thought that would be successful of not? No, not really.

,,We were having a serious conversation that hasn’t been completed yet.”

,,Oh, I didn’t expect you to wish for that to continue.. but it shouldn’t be a problem to keep conversing.. that is unless you think you won’t be able to, A-Cheng..”

Was it likely more than a little mean to play that card against the smaller male? It was, but at the same time this was one of the only options for him to get to know more.. how severe that side of the Jiang Sect Leader was able to affect him. the answer came fast and clear: another lightning bolts firing glare, followed from the most offended yet arrogant sounding vocal snap.

,,As if I’d fail that easily.”

,,Mh.."

The little hum the Jade let out only caused Wanyin to glare at him yet again.. but this time Xichen didn't care all that much, he almost ignored it. He also didn't mind it much as he leaned in, possibly for a kiss, and the Jiang Sect Leader turned his head - there were enough options left.. and, oh, how sweet it was that the breath of his lover hitched as both his own and his lips brushed against his ear.

,,Wang.. A-Zhan hadn't taken the loss of our mother well.. Not many understood him, yet I did.. and after our loss, he grew even more distant as well as silent.."

,,You shouldn't have.. supported that.."

Wanyin spoke up with a shaky voice, caused by the fact that the older ones hand was trailing lines over his thigh. At first over the cloth, not long after, however, Xichens hand revealed the sensitive skin. Apart from the shaky hint, there was a short pause in the smaller males sentence as the Jades lips brushed against his neck this time before the soft and gentle teasing with teeth made him feel a lightning like sensation go all the way through him.

,,I have to admit that you're likely right.. a part of me hoped, assumed that maybe one day he would change again. That he would want what everyone does."

,,And Wei Wuxian was your solution?"

Regardless of still wearing his self-restraint ribbon, the Lan Sect Leader ended up letting out a soft huff of a laugh.. it was just too amusing how quick the younger ones mind seemed to clear again with the right.. or well, wrong mentioning. Xichen also took note of how displeasured his lover sounded in midst of his heavy Yunmeng dialect coming through and the drunkenness that made it all the more adorable in combination.

,,Looking back.. it likely wasn’t the best of choices, yet.. I wasn’t all that much older than you and not all that much wiser.. Not to mention that I’m known for not making the best of choices..”

The light, teasing strokes up and down the inside of Wanyin’s thigh came to a hold as the latter tensed. It was a little strange.. after all, shouldn’t the Jade be the one to feel more than one sort of discomfort at that?


	213. XiCheng | 100

,,We all fucked up shit more than once so cut it, Huan.”

The Jiang Sect Leader scolded, rather harshly yet with good intentions deep down inside. He, however, didn’t turn his head to look at the taller male of which the teasing on his neck had also stopped now. Wanyin knew that his character was always somewhat of a dangerous game - as much as someone would know him, it was fate (or whichever other crap those dreamer used as excuses to deal with their life issues).. it was all up to tiny things that could make it go well still, or make it all fall apart.

Instead of saying anything the taller one of them let out a soft breath that tickled against the younger leaders skin that was already slightly wet and sensitive from all the attention he had been paying to it. After that, to the tsunderes surprise, Xichen rested his cheek on the others shoulder - for a moment it seemed as if he was about to reach out to get a hold of his lovers hand, yet he paused and rested it on the younger leaders thigh instead.

,,With how sheltered you’ve grown up I’m still surprised you’re that normal.. or skilled..”

The likelyhood of it still taking years before the tsundere would be able to say something nice without making it still sound like a sarcastic remark.. wasn’t low, to say the least.. However, this time to the Jades surprise, Wanyin reached up to undo his hair before placing his hair accessory down and.. letting his hand sneakily, without a word, drop right beside that of the Lan Sect Leader.

As little as Xichen believed to know about anyone still after all the things he had once believed wrongly.. he was quite sure of one thing still: too many words could ruin a lot of things with the younger one, but none were even worse.. which was just another contradictionary trait Wanyin had because conversations didn’t appear to be what he favoured the most either.. but..

The Jade wouldn’t give up that opportunity for a lot of things at that moment in time - And so, once he had given the other a few seconds to overthink his action, he carefully slowly put his own hand on top of his lovers. At first he just let it rest there.. no reaction came from Wanyin though, neither negative nor positive and so.. Xichen collected anything he felt like he could need within him - like, for example, the chance to be rejected and thrown off - before giving the younger ones hand a gentle squeeze. Again, nothing good or bad happened.. and so, the Lan Sect Leader let out the breath he hadn’t realized he kept sucked deep into his lungs; ultimately causing his body to relax just like his mind.

,,It was the fault of more than one person in most situations as well. You can keep on beating yourself up about it but it won’t change anything.”

,,A-Zhan already had a bit of a liking towards young master Wei before I involved myself in their affairs..”

,,They still don’t make any sense to me - One never showed any type of interest, the other even forgot the others face..”

The shiver of disgust that went through the Jiang Sect Leader didn’t go unnoticed, yet Xichen didn’t take it the wrong way.. even he himself still struggled with coming to terms with it all, especially since the way their “brothers” were conducting their private “meetings” wasn’t much of a secret and even less well viewed or taken in by anyone.. or anyone normal, not that he and Wanyin fully counted as that but..

,,Can we stop talking about them now.”

Another time where the younger one technically asked something while saying those few words like a normal, no room for debate leaving sentence. Just to see what would happen if he’d try going against the “order”, Xichen, however, sat back up and shook his head before saying a few words himself.

,,I believe it would be beneficial to further discuss about them.”

,,Talk to yourself then on your way back to your room - I’ll go and take my bath now, night.”

Biting down on his lower lip to refrain from letting out a chuckle Xichen watched how the Jiang Sect Leader quickly got up and fixed his night robe - tone giving away that he was done with it all and the taller ones teasing had somewhat killed his mood.

,,Let us take one together, A-Cheng..”

Within the briefest of moments, without even needing to get up from the bed, the Jade had reached out.. and Wanyin now found himself pulled between his lovers parted legs with said ones arms wrapped around his middle. Even seated, the Lan Sect Leaders height was still noticeable.. but just as noticeable was it for the younger male that both his body and mind were completely up for betraying him.. Wanyin felt his heart pound in his chest, his breathing a little too intense as he tried his best to keep his glare and stern expression from faltering.

“It’s the alcohol”, the Jiang Sect Leader tried to fool himself with that.. it couldn’t be that he was affected - that affected - by the warm, gentle stare that was fixed on him from his lover with those dark yet not any less stunning brown eyes.. hopefulness could be seen in them, matching the soft and somewhat luring tone the taller one had spoken in.. but more than anything, it was Lan Xichen, the guy that could really have anyone if he’d want to yet he wanted him.. and his face was also quite dangerously close to a potential workout with those lips and that tongue that were capable of so much more than just sect talk.

,,Why would I share such a small tub with you?”

Keeping his gaze on Wanyin, Xichen was able to understand quite quickly at this point what was going on inside of his head.. And not only on the inside because before the younger one of them turned his head away his face flushed quite a lively shade of pink. Even the Jiang Sect Leaders tone was slightly on edge.. but honestly the Jade found it both adorable and loveable.

,,Why not?”

There were a hundred and one reasons at least that initially popped up in the tsunderes head.. but each single one of them vanished just as fast because the taller one had already gotten up as well - pulling him just that tad closer, their bodies only separated by the few layers they were wearing and once again Wanyin was able to feel his lovers lips brush against his ear.

,,Why don’t we enjoy this last night, Wanyin? Let’s do a few good things for one another before we have to go back to living our separate lifes..”

Oh.. right.. There was that, the Jiang Sect Leader had nearly forgotten about the fact that within half a day - plus/minus a bit, depending - all of this would be over and they’d both face everything alone again.. Wanyin had to swallow, there was a strange tight feeling coming from both his chest and throat as he barely managed not to instinctively snap his head in the older ones direction - why he forced himself not to look? He wasn’t too sure if he was afraid of seeing his seniors expression after his tone already sounded so heavy-hearted.. or if he was afraid to let the other see his expression, being unaware of the face he was making right then and there himself.


	214. XiCheng | 101

,,What do you wanna do?”

Wanyin asked after a few seconds had passed in a way that was far too casual yet with a strangely hoarse hint to his own voice - Everything combining caused the Lan Sects older Jade to look up for the first time from the spot on his lovers shoulder that he had rested his chin on.. Giving the younger males middle a gentle squeeze, Xichen thought for a few seconds only before replying in his usual tone but with the smile that was playing on his lips being more audible.

,,Would you allow me to brush your hair?”

,,I thought you wanted to share the tub.”

,,I do, but I want to make sure you won’t be troubled with your hair first.”

,,Whatever.”

The tsundere replied coldly in between of a shrug, yet to the Jades amusement he actually did pull away - only to retrieve a smaller something to sit on and sitting down like the spoiled, proud guy that he was. Back straight, hands folded neatly on his lap, lightning shooting gaze fixed on anything but Lan Xichen. There was definitely a part of the wild god that found Wanyin so cute that he could eat him up if it wouldn’t be that much of a waste or kiss and cuddle him allday.. but if he’d try that he’d probably not come out in one piece himself so...

Ignoring how sad he had made himself with recalling those facts Xichen still went into the bath to retrieve the brush before coming back and sitting down on the bed behind the smaller male. With how good the Lan Sect Leader knew his lover even before they had crossed the lines they had crossed now.. it wasn’t hard to guess that Wanyin was boiling inside, trying his hardest to find things to get mad about.. not that he was given the chance because if nothing.. Xichen had always had far longer hair and a younger brother as well so he was quite skilled at brushing hair without tugging on knots and all of that.

It was a calm moment.. a gentle one with nothing being audible and no word getting said. It was.. comforting, comfortable… and strangely relaxing for the both of them. Maybe something they both needed after the past days - decades - of all the crazy things they had been through.

The 5 minutes it took at most felt like 10 at least, maybe longer.. and they both felt some sadness as the taller one of them had finished as well as rosen from his seat again. Not that that lasted long either because Xichen had already put the brush aside by the time Jiang Cheng had gotten up as well… and just like earlier he made sure to bring them close together again.

This time, however, he only rested one of his palms on his lovers hip while the other cupped the drunkards cheek - stroking lightly with his thumb over the yet again reddening skin. Initially Wanyin stared up at the Jade with eyes a tad wide open, honestly both surprised and stunned.. still soft and moved from the little moment they just shared, yet the longer Xichen kept doing nothing else but staring right back at him.. there was suspicion as well as irritation going through the Jiang Sect Leader; both visibly and seconds after also audibly.

,,What?”

,,Nothing.~”

Xichen’s reply came a bit slow but melodically and it took quite a bit of self-control from the smaller male to not lean into the touch that was still all too present on his cheek. At the end the Lan Sect Leader retreated first, gesturing with his hand to the bedrooms exit with a smile framing his fine facial features so soft and.. loving? Lovesick?

The Jade saw more irritation on his lovers face yet ultimately, somehow, Wanyin only shook his head before stalking away… or at least the tsundere had to think he did so in a proud fashion yet in truth he was more staggering and swaying a little at the same time - causing Xichen to chuckle silently to himself before he also followed.

* * *

Even though he had reminded Wanyin of it, or given the suggestion - not that long ago as well - now that he walked inside the bath to see his lover use a fire talisman for heating up the water.. it caused the Jade to pause in his steps, making sure that the other wouldn’t be startled or worse get upset in case he said or did the wrong thing.

It wasn’t a “hack” that many knew.. because it was a little tricky, logically. Xichen only had heard of it in the midst of a visit from his uncle as he spend his time in seclusion that during a night hunt one of the Juniors had proposed this “ridiculous and overly dangerous” train of thought. Was it the typical Junior trio or even quartett? More than likely.

Of course though, a few adapted that little trick.. sooner or later even special talismans were drawn for that task and similar ones with - for example - less energy getting used. Lan Xichen was one of those that used it, Wei Wuxian of course as well and it now appeared to have actually reached even the Jiang Sect Leaders ears - which further proved that Jin Ling must’ve heard or been involved in the idea as well; at least to an extent unknown to Xichen.

What made him feel a little uneasy was.. that it took quite the self-control to use this method without accidentally causing havoc.. and if for nothing Jiang Cheng was definitely known for his temper to the last edge of China.. Only as the small flame that reached just a little above the wooden tubs bottom vanished did the Lan Sect Leader let out a breath that - luckily - wasn’t audible.

,,Are you sure we wanna try squeezing ourselves in there together?”

Wanyin tried to sound as casual and calm as possible.. yet he still felt more than a little on edge because.. that did go beyond just sharing some “basic intimacy” - and yes, he still fooled himself perfectly fine into thinking that all they had done so far was casual and normal.

The response the younger male got was clear, even without words getting used. As he turned, the wild god was already halfway through the process of undoing his ribbon.. and once it was securely put aside, those strong and trained arms wrapped back around his middle as if it was some sort of natural reflex at this point.

A furrow had already appeared between the younger leaders brows as he stood there all tense - hands trapped between himself and the Jade.. yet as fully prepared as Wanyin had been to protest against the never ending closeness the other was creating between them.. his expression faltered as that of his lover was the same from before, the mysterious one that Xichen tried to claim as being “nothing”.

,,What?!”

There was more irritation audible in the tsunderes tone this time as his hands instinctively tightened their hold on the chest portion of the taller males robes. His face also burned again, which Wanyin only felt yet the Jade was perfectly able to see..


	215. XiCheng | 102

,,I just thought about how beautiful you look with your hair down..”

Xichen replied in a trapped in a trance like tone. Before, however, one of his hands had come up to stroke a strand of his lovers hair behind his ear. At this point really all Wanyin could do was letting out a few incoherent noises that only caused the taller males expression to soften more.. Well, that was at least until the tsundere gave him quite the hard punch against the chest, causing the Jade to let out an acted pained noise that made the Jiang Sect Leader blush even more furiously.

,,You react as if no one has ever told you that before, my dear A-Cheng.”

,,Why would anyone call a man beautiful like he’s a maiden?!”

,,So that’s your one and only problem? My way of phrasing?”

Xichen said in the middle of a chuckle that was so warm and soft in sound, perfectly matching to both his expression and tone of voice. The chain of events that followed next was the same from seconds ago: the smaller ones mouth opened and closed as if he was a fish without water, another - harder - punch against the Jades chest and more furious blushing.. and some raging, but that again was nothing new or unexpected.

,,It’s not! Damn it.. who do you even think you are..”

,,A person that is more than willing to praise you all day, Wanyin.”

The Lan Sect Leader said with no shame in sight and absolutely no second too long wasted when it came to thinking about how to respond. Naturally, the tsundere struggled some further but neither his lovers hug nor expression gave in even the slightest of bits and in contrast to that Wanyin faltered pretty much from head to toe.

,,You really know no shame, Lan Huan.”

,,There is no need to be ashamed as I am simply speaking what is the truth for me.”

,,You-”

In contrary to the tough front Jiang Cheng tried to keep up.. When the Jade leaned in to stop him from saying more, their lips met and the gentle yet strong hold onto his nape.. Let’s just say that the purple ball of lightning’s body was far more honest than he was himself as he instinctively relaxed, only a muffled noise coming from him that were the remaining bits of whatever he had still intended to say.

It pissed him of that he could so clearly feel the sly, proud smile playing on the taller males lips.. and initially Wanyin kept glaring, refraining to slide into the bottom role with closing his eyes while knowing the dark, warm gaze of Lan Xichen would remain fixed on him from start to end.. but as the Jades arm pulled him closer, making their bodies further turn into one.. Damn it, his eyelids and voice simply didn’t want to obey his minds remaining stubbornness.

Unsurprisingly not much time passed before their hands started to have a life of their own.. and it only took a few complicated, unskilled movements before they were trapped in a matching hug. Arms hidden under opened robes, Wanyins naked front tightly pressed against the half naked, half clothed body of the other.. soft noises escaping from both of them.

,,Let's get inside the tub.."

,,Mh.."

They only parted reluctantly and the Lan Sect Leader had a hard time with trying to hold back a chuckle because of how soft and welcoming the other suddenly was. Undressing wasn't a hard task, getting inside the tub though.. was a bit of a struggle, a rather vocal one from Jiang Cheng's side especially since he was also the one sitting.. or squeezed on top of the taller one.

,,That’s so freaking uncomfortable..”

,,It would be easier for you if you would turn around instead of trying to use me as a chair.”

Xichen was having a hard time with trying not to grow excited because of how much his lover moved on top of his lap in a desperate - always failing - attempt to sit more comfortably without facing him.. what made it worse was that it seemed as if the younger leader was completely unaware of the potential risk that came with his movements.

As patient as the older one sounded still, his words were enough to tip the tsundere over the edge of his none existent patience.. meaning that Wanyin got up - again, heavens why - with his well trained backside in perfect view of the Jade before turning and with quite some force sitting down on Xichen’s lap. The Lan Sect Leader was more happy to be able to look at the others flushed face now.. even if it had almost cost his private parts life - which he barely managed to pull out of the way before the weight of his lover would’ve squeezed it into an entirely new, equally as unrecognizable as unusable shape.

,,There, satisfied now?!”

Wanyin snapped at the taller one.. only to show the most upset of faces a second later as he -of course - had to get the wrong idea of why just mentioned one pulled his hand from the “in high risk” area. Before the Lan Sect older Jade could even explain though the moody one was already at it again.

,,Are you serious? Just.. You really know neither shame nor patience.”

,,A-Cheng-”

,,Don’t even try to pull your perverted ass out of this situation.”

,,To be frank, I wasn’t trying to pull my ass out of this situation - I had to pull my private parts out of the situation of you sitting down on it with full force.”

,,Oh..”

Jiang Cheng felt around as retarded as he both looked and sounded as he instantly turned his head away that was once again bright red - this time though the redness reached both his ears and neck. There were a few moments of silence during which the wild god let out a soft breath as he rested his arms on the edge of the tub.. at the end, without it being a surprise to Xichen, the Jiang Sect Leader changed the topic with his tone being somewhat shy like at the beginning yet more like himself at the end.. okay, a pretty damn drunk version of his tsundere self, to be fair.

,,I don’t get why no one had the idea yet to build and sell bigger tubs - it would provide quite the income.”

,,It certainly would, even apart from situations like this one.”

Xichen agreed, and heavens.. how cute it was to watch his lover flinch and remain tense afterwards, all awkward and shy - so desperate to not let their eyes meet. He hadn’t been aware that he found so much joy in teasing someone but.. the smaller males reactions were an exception he loved to see, uncaring of what he’d need to do for that - half the time even subconsciously.


	216. XiCheng | 103

,,If you lean back a little I could help you wash up.."

There were a few twists and turns in the younger ones expression - a variety ranging from surprise, to irritation and the hesitation that always came through in between.. or maybe hesitation wasn’t the right word.. it was more doubt. “Likely because of the scars”, was what Xichen thought as he reached for the soap only to smile at the tsundere ever so gently and sweetly afterwards.

It took a minute, several seconds for sure, before the Jiang Sect Leader gave in - leaning back, kilometres away from relaxed and instead a thick wall of wariness and suspicion up. Xichen, however, as hard as it may be acted like nothing was “special” about his lovers chest at all.. because on one side it was, on the other it was just a different kind of normal: Jiang Cheng’s normal and if the one with the scars already wouldn’t be able to see it that way even after all those years.. somehow, Xichen felt like he should try his best to make him feel that way.. he felt.. oddly responsible, but that was really just his old self coming through.

That said, letting the hand in which he tightly held onto the soap momentarily disappear in the water, the Jade then went about.. doing something that wasn’t meant to have such a double meaning to itself. Collecting some water in his palm, he leaned forward and let it run down on the younger ones chest - pretty much right in the middle of it, only to further wet the skin.. He couldn’t quite blame Wanyin for looking at him with a raised brow as if to ask “Really?” and without him even being able to take control his facial muscles he felt his lips curve into a.. a smirk, heavens what was going on with him?

The Jiang Sect Leaders reaction was the following: a roll of his eyes, shaking his head and looking away - as if he hoped it would drown out his tomato red face, not in this lifetime. From there on everything proceeded half normally - half not. While Xichen did in fact go about washing the smaller leaders chest, he also more naturally massaged the finely toned upper body of his lover.. and those two hardening treats really gave away what Wanyin was barely able to hide the longer the Jades hands kept brushing and kneading over them: He liked it still, they were still an embarrassingly weak spot of his.

,,A-Cheng?”

,,What?”

,,Can I ask you something?”

,,You just did, so - no.”

Two could play the teasing game - and with the look that the Jade gave him now, all upset with cheeks full of air making him look like a over-sized squirrel.. Wanyin struggled to not let his lips curve into a smirk. He ultimately lost the fight though and his expression must’ve been far too smug and pleased because the next thing that happened was that Xichen let out a speechless sounding “You!” before splashing water in his face.. were they 3 years old, ages added together? Apparently they were.

,,What is it?”

The Jiang Sect Leader tried to sound both bored and uninterested - while in truth he was rather thankful for an interruption of their situation, or more of a minimal distraction.. Both of their minds had wandered places, but - heavens - the purple ball of lightning couldn’t guess how dirty of a mind his senior truly had.

The more intensely his lovers reaction had turned out to be.. the more Xichen had wished to just get rid of the soap on the younger males chest and replace his hands with his lips and tongue.. letting his wet muscle tease one of the hardened nubs while twirling the other between his fingers - Why was life so hard suddenly? And.. not only life.. but also.. He really needed to distract himself, fast.

,,Give me your arm first so I can wash that as well.”

Surprisingly, even though he looked yet again a tad weirded out Jiang Cheng stretched out his left arm without complaining or arguing before leaning his cheek into the hand, elbow of his arm that wasn’t getting fondled propped up on the edge of the tub.

,,How do you feel when you are confronted with fire?”

,,It’s not like I can avoid it.”

,,I see..”

Their replies came rather fast and despite the younger ones eyes widening slightly at first and his tone of voice sounding quite sarcastic.. he knew perfectly fine where the Lan Sect Leader was coming from, or what he meant in other words. It wasn’t until Wanyin had to give his lover his right arm that he glanced at Xichen.. who looked strange.. gone out, lost in thought - sad, maybe.

,,As I said I can’t avoid it - I can avoid larger fires however.”

Xichen’s gaze that was so far fixed on the from the long winter rather pale skin of the tsundere now flickered up - surprise could be easily spotted because he understood what the Jiang Sect Leader said without him needing to step out of his comfort zone too much. Jiang Cheng.. Wanyin, he wasn’t the type to admit straight out that he could find discomfort - in a more modern term: a trigger - in something. That was too much of a confession to having a weakness.

,,I see.”

The Jade lowly said as he averted his gaze back to the task at hand after a few seconds had passed. He didn’t want to make the other feel regret from opening up, like it was something much attention should be paid to.

Another minute went by like that before the taller one of them poured some water over the in soap covered and freshly massaged arm of the other. Once Xichen was done, however, and he tried to reach for the soap.. he saw something out of the corner of his eye that caught him both off guard and by surprise - further so what the tsundere went on to say.

,,It’s your turn now, isn’t it?”

,,You don’t have to.”

,,I don’t have to so you can use it against me at some point that you played my servant without getting anything in return? Don’t try to sell me as retarded, Huan - I’m not gonna give you such a strong thing to rub under my nose whenever you feel like it.”

Wanyin said in between of snatching the soap away from the other - Honestly, he sounded so sure of the fact that the Jade would actually wait for a really embarrassing moment to bring that up - potentially - that Xichen couldn’t help but huff out a laugh as he leaned back.

,,There’s nothing for you to laugh about, Huan.”

,,A lot of pleasurable things to see and imagine however, my dear.”

,,You shameless..”

Now it was the younger leaders turn to splash water in the others face.. not that it worked a lot as distraction for the fact that he had once more gone red in the face. The act only backfired though because Xichen was forced to stroke his hair out of his face.. and shit did the tsundere feel that in critical, him betraying parts of his body. What made it worse though was the smirk that ended up framing the wild gods face.. The Lan Sect Leader knew the effect he had on Jiang Cheng.. far, far too well.


	217. XiCheng  | 104

,,If I may be allowed to remind you about why I’m behaving so shamelessly..”

Xichen said without the smirk like smile fading from his face. It should’ve been enough to understand, the look on his face and his rather seductive tone.. but all he got was another raised brow and suspicious look in return.

If that wasn’t clear enough, maybe he had to act even more shamelessly?

,,What?! You?? And you’re the one supposed to be sober..”

There were quite a few positive points to being the “big spoon”.. because really all he needed to do was pull his legs up a little while his hands cupped his lovers well formed backside - and as if sitting on a slide, the Jiang Sect Leaders body easily ended up closer to a position where they’d be easily able to “connect”.

Unsurprisingly, the tsundere didn’t take it all too well as he tried to keep some distance between them with stretching his arms out to get a hold of the tubs edge… The Jade, however, only raised a brow and let an innocent little humming noise that caused Wanyin to “Tsk” at him.

,,I should be sober - in your standards, your eyes.. yet-”

,,I swear, if you’re going to say anything even more shameless I’m going to let you eat the entire soap, Huan.”

The younger one only realized seconds later that he was doing nothing but giving the Lan Sect Leader more room for some sort of embarrassing shenanigans.. Wanyin only realized when the smirk grew wider, almost turning into a boyish grin and.. he couldn’t tear his eyes away, for all money on earth he couldn’t.

,,Is that so..? I’m afraid I have to admit I wouldn’t mind my mouth being preoccupied.. if you know what I mean - A-Cheng..~”

Xichen lured, his tone going lower and lower until he breathed the last few words against his lovers lips - Other than the Jiang Sect Leader, the Jade noticed how Wanyin’s breath came to a hold, the faint parting of his quivering lips, the almond colored gaze that flickered about him and finally - ultimately got locked with his own.

,,But alright.. If that’s how things are then I’ll neither say nor do anything so shameless again.”

Wanyin was left behind with water splashing about as.. not only his expression but also something inside of him felt as if it dropped. This.. this guy had just.. Had he just been so obviously lead on and played by Lan Xichen? Because as slowly as the other had leaned in, as fast were his legs back on the ground of the tub, hands gone and the leave thick distance that was formerly all that lingered between their lips at least half an arm-length wide.

,,Here.”

,,Mh?”

,,You dropped the soap.”

,,Oh.. right…”

Even if the younger one made sure to not meet his eyes.. somehow, the Jade could tell that there was something off. He had held the soap out for a few seconds already but even after initially speaking up - the other still didn’t seem to see it. There was also Wanyin’s tone, spaced out, sounding as if he wasn’t quite there and… the manner in which his arm sank back onto his thigh that was somewhat exposed in the air..

It couldn’t be that he had made a crack into his lovers facade - even just the tiniest one.. or..?

Xichen began to believe more that he had done so as it took more than a minute for sure before the other raised his hand to drip some bits of water onto his chest before going about using the soap on his chest and arms.. all that without looking up, saying a word or even trying something.. even something as subtle as coming a tad too close, or letting his hand wander..

* * *

,,Do you want me to help-”

,,No need.”

When his hand got brushed off as the Jiang Sect Leader got out of the tub first - because he had to - on unstable legs.. by then Xichen didn’t need anything else as a confirmation anymore to know that something was going more wrong than on..

,,I will.. leave first then..”

Xichen then made the decision he thought was best: giving the younger one some space.. However, he hadn’t even gotten back into the living/dining area of the room as a rather alarming noise already happened.

And surely, as he rushed back inside the bath - only dressed in his undergarment..

,,A-Cheng..? What happened?”

,,Nothing.”

,,Your hand is dripping with blood, am I still supposed to believe you’re fine?”

,,Believe whatever you want.”

Even stepping in front of the Jiang Sect Leader, speaking in a voice full of worry.. there was no getting through to the other. At the end Wanyin simply tried to pass by him, speaking in his drunken tone with no real emotion in it.

The next thing Xichen knew was that something inside him went off and simultaneously the next thing the younger one knew was that he got pushed against the wall and trapped between the others arms. No level of drunkenness could make Wanyin forget that even sober he had no chance against the Jades physical strength, he was.. more stubborn though, so he kept his gaze averted yet just like earlier and quite a few times already in his life - as much as he wished for it, he couldn’t not listen what he didn’t wish to hear.

,,A-Cheng.. I have asked you for one thing and one thing alone.. Please don't act recklessly around me or try to shoulder everything on your own.. I don't know how I'm going to react.."

Well, one thing was for sure: the tsundere didn't react at all no matter how much more desperate the taller ones tone got.. which it did quite rapidly in the short breaks between the words Xichen said.

,,You tell me to believe in whatever I want.. but I can't, that's the problem because.. because whatever I truly believed in turned out to be false.."

As nothing came from the younger one yet again.. well, the Jiang Sect Leader didn’t react but for that he took a few things in.. How Xichen shifted his weight, likely clenching a hand into a fist beside his head.. the stressed breathing.. and then how the Jades other hand began to caress his cheek a little roughly and clumsily.


	218. XiCheng | 105

,,A-Cheng.. If I have done something to make you mad, let it out on me and not yourself..”

,,You’re shaking, Huan.”

The younger one spoke up somewhat hesitantly. He hadn’t been overly sure, yet with the other leaning his forehead against his he could feel it quite well and it was only getting worse.

However, somewhat surprisingly.. Xichen only let out a breath, the relief making his body give in a little momentarily as he already breathed a few words out while pulling the tsundere into a hug.. that was far too tight.

,,You finally said something..”

,,Are you about to faint?”

,,I am.. not quite sure..”

Should it be more or less alarming that the taller one of them managed a slightly embarrassed laugh at the end? Wanyin wasn’t too sure, but being so close to the other.. it was oddly comforting yet the way his lovers heart pounded all erratically..

,,Let go off me already, you idiot.”

Xichen did as told - reluctantly.. despite him being barely able to see the others face though the redness was still easily to spot and it was.. so adorable. That was at least until something happened that he hadn’t quite anticipated as the Jiang Sect Leader.. grabbed him and threw him over his shoulder - too fast for the shock to have even subsided enough so he could do anything but let out a few surprised noises.

,,See it as revenge for all the times you carried me around.”

,,I didn’t carry you like that-”

,,Here I’m trying to be nice and you’re still making demands. I can just drop you as well, ya know?”

Well, it was.. better than nothing but.. Xichen did question how the other would react if he’d treat him like some sack of potatoes. Since he took too long to reply, the Jiang Sect Leader must’ve misunderstood since he began to walk.. and really, seconds later only the Jade felt even more light-headed as he got “catapulted” onto the bed.

,,Do you want a tea or something?”

It took a bit for the older male to sit up, his hair a mess and lower garment even more so.. he also almost replied as he ran his hand through his hair with a “Yes, please” but..

,,No, wait.. your hand-”

,,It’s not half as bad as it looks - here.”

The hints of color the Jades face had regained due to hanging head down over the others shoulder.. was gone once Wanyin put his still bleeding hand right in front of his eyes. Not that the wound was overly severe - sure, not nice to look at, but.. it shouldn’t be enough to make someone who had fought as many battles as Xichen go pale and look away.

,,Was that-”

,,On purpose? I already guessed that some of your behaviour wasn’t caused by mine but I wasn’t sure.”

,,That’s-”

,,Not nice? Huan, you should know me better than that.”

The Lan Sect Leader couldn’t quite argue that as he tried to breath away the urges to hide himself or let whatever he’d eaten and drank the past hours resurface. In between of that the younger one of them had rolled up the left sleeve of his purple night robe before he turned to get something to patch himself up with.

,,Wanyin?”

,,I wasn’t planning to go and tell anyone.”

,,Thank you but that’s not what I.. There is a pouch with herbs in one of my outer robes sleeves..”

,,I see.”

They were both a little off behaviour wise - even talking without looking at one another. Once those few words were exchanged, the younger leader looked around.. and to his embarrassment his lovers clothing was actually neatly folded laying on the chair like seat. So.. he had really made a fool out of himself, thinking the Jade planned to leave for good while..

Pushing that aside, Wanyin got the herbs while trying not to leave any bloodstains on the others clothing before he walked out of the bedroom into the living/dining room area.

* * *

The shaking hadn’t vanished as the tsundere left - it only grew worse, actually and so.. Well, Xichen pulled his legs up to his chest, wrapped his arms around them and rested his forehead on top of them.

Even if Jiang Cheng had admitted in his own way that he still dealt with the aftermath of the burning of his home many years ago..The Lan Sect Leader still felt weak and like a failure.. He should just get over what had happened already - it had been years, he wasn’t the only one who had done and seen such things.. He still had his role, the same role as a bit over two years ago and.. how underneath the heavens was he supposed to fulfill any of that if the slightest bit of “too much blood” already got to him like that?

While the older one bashed onto himself this way - The younger one was dealing with his own mental luggage.

He had stepped outside, washed his hand, cursed at himself and bandaged it up.. all while thinking about how he was supposed to deal with the situation. It wasn’t how Xichen had understood - He hadn’t been and still wasn’t mad at the other..

He was mad at himself. Mad at himself for always acting in ways that ultimately seemed to make people choose anything but him. He pushed and pushed people into disliking him, yet couldn’t deal with them choosing something or someone else then.

Honestly, even Wanyin himself couldn’t deny that he was a hypocrite in quite a few ways. And he knew perfectly fine that he’d be worse now after realizing what he did while being aware that he’d never say any of that out loud.

Saying something lame and weakness revealing like “I’m mad at myself because I thought I fucked up”.. Maybe he should slap himself another time instead of punching a wall that had done nothing wrong in order to be able to do that.

Without knowing, both of the men let out a sigh at the same time - Just that the younger one of them had prepared a tea in his spaced out state that he poured in two cups before heading back to the bedroom. Looking at Xichen, who was still pale in the face.. Wanyin couldn’t help but think how unfortunate it was that after around 2 years of self-isolation he of all people had to be the one the Lan Sects older Jade had ended up with.


	219. XiCheng | 106

Everything from the moment the Jiang Sect Leader stepped back into the bedroom was awkward. Neither knew what to say, neither knew where to look at - Hell, the smaller male was too off to even sit down. As he had given the other the tea he had debated about saying something along the line of “Don’t burn yourself” or “It’s hot”.. but he left it as a stubborn voice in his brain reminded him that the Jade wasn’t a toddler.

,,Wanyin-”

,,I-”

,,You first-”

,,Go ahead-”

What was this situation of them speaking up at the same time again and again? Only to end up back at the awkward silence marked as square one?

,,Just say whatever you want - I’ve said enough already.”

There was the faintest of smiles appearing on the Jades face.. it was clear that the other was on edge, as well as running out of the bit of patience he had.. yet, if it was odd or not, Xichen still found it rather cute how his lover ran his hand over his face, even going as far as to regardless let him talk first. “You’re surprisingly easy to read.” - Xichen would save up the chance to say that for another time, guessing that it wouldn’t end well if he’d do so now.

,,I.. wanted to apologise.. for behaving so immaturely. I tend to push my way of doing things on you, so I tried to see how you would react if I would stop doing so. Rather than that, I should’ve asked you what you want me to do, or asked you to do what you want.”

Wrong, so wrong.. Wanyin could feel his face distort into so many ways during the others speech - so much so that he couldn’t dare look at Xichen who spoke in a low, a little ashamed tone. Miscommunication, lack of communication, it was nothing but that yet again and the younger one didn’t know if he could abandon his pride enough to clear it up.

At the end of the day.. hadn’t everything just happened because the Lan Sect Leader started it? What had he done, really - apart from going along with it?

,,Huan.. It wasn’t your fault.”

It took a few seconds before Wanyin was able to say those words, yet as he said them his voice was stable, his tone sincere. Even his gaze that momentarily met the taller males was clear and his expression serious.. After that, however, the Jiang Sect Leader walked to the window of which he opened the curtains just enough to be able to look outside - searching for an excuse, something other than Xichen to focus on.. and really..

It was a really beautiful night. The sky was clear, the moon full and stars shining brightly..

,,Huan, could you come here for a moment?”

,,Mh? Yes, is there something wrong?”

The reason for the older males concern was that Wanyin sounded rather irritated.. he was staring into the dark for more than a minute at this point, neither touching his tea nor moving the slightest of bits. As Xichen closed the gap, however, and his gaze flickered over his lovers sharp features to see where those almond colored eyes were glued to.. Well, once he turned his head and stared up at roughly the same spot as the Jiang Sect Leader the Jades eyes also grew wide as he spoke up in a tone full of honest, childlike awe.

,,There’s not a single cloud to be seen - everything is so clear and light, almost as if it is daytime still..”

,,Mmh..”

Xichen was just about to inquire what really was the cause for the others mental absence.. He had found his spot behind the younger one who.. stared up at the sky for another few moments too long before beating him to it.

It wasn’t fast, the movement the Jiang Sect Leader made to turn.. It also wasn’t fast how he got on his toes, or how he wrapped his left arm around the taller ones neck for more support.. It wasn’t rough, how their lips met as the Jades eyes grew wide again in surprise..

In truth it was a little too slowly, not slow enough to be hesitant however. A little clumsily maybe, for the younger one leading definitely too gentle.. It was the gesture in itself that caught the Lan Sect Leader by surprise, so much that the eyes of his lover that closed so fast once their lips had connected opened as he felt the hold around him tighten…

As if to remind him of his role in all of that - As if to ask him to do what he had done so far mostly as well.. How happy Xichen was to wrap his arm around Wanyin’s waist, to pull him closer, tilt his head to the side and forward a little for more comfort on his lovers end.. Honestly, he was far too happy and willing to do so and he did just that..

The most odd, however, was the kiss in itself - No matter how slim the chance of Wanyin admitting it later on.. this wasn’t a kiss with sexual intent as the main motive, maybe some bits lingering but.. so far - not counting Xichen’s peck attack - each kiss of theirs had this overflowing “lustful” feeling.. not so this one, as little as Xichen knew about it, it wasn’t hard to notice that this kiss that went on for minutes was for affection and closeness alone.

In the end the Jade was the one to pull away, slowly and unwillingly.. but he did so, fearing for the wellbeing of the others toes.

There was it again playing on his lips: the soft and love sick little smile with the matching hint in his darker colored eyes.. as he lingered there with his arms still wrapped around Wanyin's middle.. He really wanted to do anything but let go.

All those were details Jiang Cheng saw, or simple things even he could understand despite his lack of interpersonal skills.

What Xichen had seen and felt.. for some it might be nothing, to him it was a lot.. The brief softness in the others eyes, no furrowed brows or glare present.. the hand on his shoulder that twitched as the tsundere didn't quite know what to do.. How he averted his gaze, pony falling into his face that the Jade could imagine was tinted in another adorable pink hue..

,,Is your hand alright?"

,,Which one? The one I've injured purposefully or the one that the tea cup is burning?"

The younger one replied with a snort.. and as if poked with a needle the Jade quickly let go of him while saying a few hurried and worried words - Wanyin did enjoy the others guilty face a little, truth be told.

,,I totally forgot.. Let me put it aside for you."


	220. XiCheng | 107

,,Are you sure it's alright?"

,,Just sit down now, you idiot - I was just being mean."

Wanyin half reassured, half teased as he got onto the bed while the other put the cup aside. He was stretched out, upper body propped up on his elbows so he was more or less sitting.. while laying.

Despite remaining somewhat fidgety and unsure, the taller Male did as told and sat down cross legged beside the Jiang Sect Leader - slightly diagonally, around the height of the younger one's hips. And just like that he stared for a couple of seconds.. doing nothing but watch the other breath with closed eyes, which only opened again once he spoke up in a lower but more calm tone of voice with no real pressure behind them.

,,A-Cheng.. What was that?"

,,Mh? What?"

Honestly.. if the younger one would always be able to act as calm and composed - even innocent and oblivious - as he did right now.. to the point where even Xichen tapped impatiently with his fingers onto the sheets.. Well, many things would be different then, that was for sure.They stared at one another like that for a couple of seconds and the Jade was able to witness the twitching of the corners of his lovers lips that gave away he knew perfectly fine what the conversation was about.

,,I am referring to this-”

Xichen had to hold his endlessly long, black hair out of the way as he said those words with an ache to it while leaning forward. The eye contact between them remained until he brushed his lips over the others, causing both of them to subconsciously glance down at one anothers.

It was still - and would remain for quite a while - a surprise.. just how good the broken pieces that they were seemed to fit together. And they were strong, as for most of the duration of the kiss it remained innocent and sweet - as it was drawing close to them getting otherwise weak, however, the Lan Sect Leader was the one to pull back.. barely though, just so that the faintest hint of the others breath would tickle on one anothers skin still.

,,That, huh? No particular reason - I got annoyed by looking up there, that’s it.”

,,So.. you found comfort in holding onto and kissing me?”

As cool as the tsundere had tried to act, talkin all casually in his cold like yet self-sufficient tone that was accompanied by a shrug.. Having the taller one stare him dead in the eyes, the angelic and innocent looking smile playing on his lips even though his tone was.. low, the gentle “soft moment after a kiss” type - giving away that Xichen’s words were really anything but sweet and innocent, instead a total tease.. Well, glaring didn’t help the Jiang Sect Leader hide his reddening face and so he rather quickly went on to averting his gaze and clearing his throat.

,,If that thought gives you something, Huan, then feel free to make a fool of yourself.”

,,If that isn’t it.. then at least holding onto me, letting me touch and kiss you.. seeing my face and my over all presence - all those were not as uncomfortable and distressing to you as whatever you thought of, right?”

Glancing through his hair that had a life of its own again.. this Jade really had the guts to give him the sad yet hopeful puppy eyes - quite professionally executed, 11/10, he was even better than Jin Ling. All the tensing and gritting of his teeth wouldn’t really get him anywhere, Wanyin knew that perfectly fine.. but if he was going to get teased, he’d sure as hell tease back.

,,You’re walking on thin ice, Huan. Here I thought about lending you a hand and letting you stay over night.. yet you’re up to no good and I shall not push your highness to abandon any further rules.”

Honestly, Xichen himself knew that if it would’ve been possible at the mention of “staying over night” hence.. cuddling and all other forms of skinship.. he could’ve easily grown a dog’s tail that would wag from side to side like mad. It didn’t matter to him that the younger one pretty much used “past tense” since.. hadn’t Wanyin just gotten a crisis because said leader had thought he had left? Not the most intelligent or useful of threats under the given circumstances; and yes, the tsundere realized that himself as well.. just.. too late.

,,What made you so upset over the scenery? After all, you called for me to see it..”

The Jade wasn’t so surprised that his lover tensed again once he asked what was logical - ultimately causing the other to let out a groan as he tilted his head further backwards.. if it wouldn’t have been for the irritated, slightly gone out look in the younger leaders eyes the exposure of his neck and quite a bit of his chest could’ve turned Xichen’s attention to something completely else fast.

,,Upset.. isn’t quite it. I simply wanted to know if you thought the same I did, as I initially turned my gaze up there.”

,,And?”

It was strange to have someone actually listen, speak with a tone full of interest towards his drunken.. maniac like talk.. but.. at the end of the day, he could still act as if he didn’t remember any of it all later on - right? Wanyin couldn’t deny at this point yet again that his character was shit and he quite frankly a scaredy cat in his own way. What was he even getting embarrassed for in front of Xichen at this point? He had bawled his eyes out in front of that person more than once, more and less severly,.. and then there were all the happenings of the past couple of days.. and nights.. and mornings.. and..

||Just fuck off and talk you damn loser..||

Oh, nice.. His inner tsundere was running out of patience with himself again.

,,The heaven in Yunmeng is usually clear. For who knows how long at this point I felt pissed whenever I looked up there.”

,,Why? If I may ask.”

Wanyin had to snort at his own idiocy before he could even reply as he stared up at the ceiling - unwilling to meet his lovers eyes that he was aware were all focused on him.. full of care and interest, maybe even worry or.. this other word that starts with “L” that neither of them was ready for yet to be used.

,,Because no matter how shit everything was - those little pieces of garbage up there would shine as if nothing’s wrong. As if they’re laughing at us, seeing it all as a joke.. They just kept on being bright and present-”


	221. XiCheng | 108

,,I understand."

Xichen replied truthfully as one could, long before the other had to try and go further than he could at this point. It was.. just another "clarification", another never vanishing reminder of the fact that everything had changed - while at the same time nothing did. A reminder of everything being gone and lost but the things each of them in their own way could disregard of easily - and so, so willingly.

A reminder of the fact that everything and everyone was moving on beautifully.. while they were trapped in their agonizing past and the mistakes made during it.

A bit of silence spread between them.. giving Wanyin the time to debate if he should tell the Jade to forget about it, that it was idiotic as well as embarrassing and he was aware of that. He didn't, coming to the conclusion that any option would only make matters worse.

,,What was different this time?"

,,.. it annoyed me… that it didn't annoy me this time."

,,Oh..”

,,Don’t get the wrong idea or spout your usual nonsense now, you idiot.”

Well, how was Xichen supposed to even let his mind come up with something if he already got a more than light slap against the chest just after letting out a soft, surprised sound? He was capable, not that capable though especially so shortly after hearing something he hadn’t quite expected to have confessed.

,,I wasn’t planning to-”

,,Don’t act innocent after everything. You know no shame, Huan.”

,,I do know shame, yet I shall admit that your reactions make me crave to see them more than to restrain myself.”

Reactions? REACTIONS?! Was this guy for real saying those words all innocently while wearing a devils smirk.. Revenge - Wanyin needed to avenge his torn apart pride this instant before his face would keep getting any redder. That said, fixing his expression to his usual one he acted all cool and composed for a few seconds, even shrugging.. Before he attacked with all that his drunk self got - which wasn’t much, not enough to fight a successful one against the Lan Sect Leader when it came to strength.. but he wouldn’t win such a fight fairly even if he’d be sober, so..

From there on, for a few minutes maybe, a messy.. something went on between them. The younger one had given the other another, harder, yet playful slap against the chest.. then he had sat up and they just.. ended up doing something like wrestling, just messier and weirder since the Jade really had no clue as to what was going on or how he was supposed to participate.

The end, however, was what could be expected - or what had to be expected. They were both a little breathless, robes and hair a mess.. and surely enough, Wanyin found himself pinned down on the sheets, arms above his head, the Lan Sect Leader hovering above him with ease.

Wanyin would’ve liked to be mad, glare and pout.. but how could he with the other staring down at him before his face ultimately lit up and Xichen burst out laughing - hiding his face against his younger lovers neck..

Maybe that was it.. the Jiang Sect Leaders inner voice began to rub salt into one of his never healing wounds. Maybe what made Wei Wuxian decide to leave with Lan Wangji - over and over - instead of trying to fix their ugly situation.. Maybe it was just that, the never ending occasions one may have with bringing out a side of someone no one else had an idea about. Getting to know the unknown, each day getting to know something new.. moving on, not holding onto the past..

Maybe that wasn’t it - He couldn’t quite imagine how much, if anything, there was to get to know about Wangji, especially with how terrible his former sworn brothers relationship seemed to turn out.. or be.. but he had it, with Xichen. Over and over again those “Oh” moments that would leave his mind with nothing else to think about than seeing what he hadn’t seen, even less dared to imagine, so far.

Maybe that had been what his mother had waited for, throughout her “loveless” marriage - being able to open up, but more than anything have her husband show her all the sides of his she had feared Fengmian ached to show Cangse Sanren instead. After all, thinking back, hadn’t she always tried to provoke Fengmian to react? Do something, anything?

Maybe that was what had kept A-Li holding onto Zixuan.. The hope she could manage what their parents hadn’t. The ache to not let the one she loved remain in his unhappy situation where he disregarded anything that wasn’t the best. Make him live, laugh, love..

Crap.. What was he getting all emotional and melancholic over? And why-

Oh- that was why.

The voice nagged again as Xichen finally lifted his head. There was it again, the hair that worked as a curtain between them and the world, both still panting as really.. in reality only seconds had passed, despite how long it felt to Jiang Cheng.

"Oh", he thought this time as the Lan Sect Leader let out a heavy, yet soft in nature type of breath as he tilted his head to the side - smiling ever so softly as he let go of one of Wanyin's wrists to gently brush a few strands of hair out of the tsunderes face.. ultimately letting the back of his fingers caress the reddened cheek before cupping it in that illegally large hand of his.

,,Don’t forget to breath, my dear.”

,,Shut up.”

Other than usually there was no real threatening intent in the younger ones tone as he finally did take a breath. He wanted to do nothing more than tell the other not to talk, which he made sure Xichen wouldn’t get the chance. Wrapping an arm around the Jades neck, they both naturally leaned closer, one a little up - the other a tad down until their lips met.

* * *

,,What now?”

,,Want to take a walk?”

For once it was a win on the Jiang Sect Leaders side. Somewhere during the kiss - during which they didn’t keep their tongues to themselves either - they each developed a little situation in their lower region. However while the younger one was all serious and composed, the Jade this time around.. well, his expression dropped more than a little which made the other feel rather good about himself.

,,If you want.”

The reply came belated, too belated, yet despite it being minimally audible that the Jade was struggling it was just as audible that he was seriously interested. Wanyin strung the other along for a few seconds more before dropping his arm back onto the sheets.

,,I wouldn’t say no, but what I want right now is for you to lay down.”

,,I don’t think I understand..”

,,Is it sudden distrust? Just lay down, I don’t feel like sleeping yet.”


	222. XiCheng | 109

Xichen gave in after that, still somewhat reluctantly but he did get up, turn and got into the same position the younger was in earlier - propped up on his elbows, robe even more of a mess and barely covering him at this point.

,,Say one wrong word and I’ll send you back to your room - naked.”

,,I’m afraid I don’t know what I could say since I’m not yet aware of what you’re intending to do, A-Cheng.”

The older one gave back, mildly confused as he watched his lover get up as well, mess with his hair and.. Oh, he understood a bit more once the Jiang Sect Leader turned and got back onto the bed and their eyes met - only after Wanyin had teased his way up on his body, however, and made sure to tend to the sensitive spots.

,,I don’t know at times if you’re ticklish or if you feel it at certain spots.”

,,It should be easy to find that out.”

,,You’re shameless.. wouldn’t it be awkward for you to have all those parts of you all sensitive and have them remain this way while you’re going back to Gusu tomorrow?”

,,That shall be my concern for another moment in time.”

,,Don’t put the blame on me afterwards, Huan.”

,,I won’t, my dear.”

The conversation between them ran surprisingly smoothly with Wanyin rolling his eyes at the end.

,,Then, let’s see..”

Xichen wasn’t too sure if the auspicious expression of his lover was good or not… but his body and mind were far too ready to take and work with whatever the Jiang Sect Leader would come up with - and it didn’t take long before Wanyin made a move with leaning in to a spot that weirdly enough already had explored quite a bit.. Which the taller one then also pointed out, in a tone that gave away though that he was enjoying the attention either way.

,,A-Cheng.. you already studied the sensitivity of my neck more than once..”

,,And?”

Wanyin mumbled under his breath and as if that wasn’t provocative and seductive enough he then brushed his lips against the others ear before lightly nibbling on his lobe. The reaction was amusing, more than clear, with how the Jades head dropped a little further to the side - exposing more of his skin.

,,Wouldn’t it be more interesting to test other spots?”

,,The impatience you’re letting yourself get taken over with.. so many broken rules..”

,,I’m shameless, did you already forget?~”

,,You’re in no position to be provocative now - are you, Huan?”

Honestly, at some point Xichen lost the ability to properly say if what got to him were the spots the younger one teased or simply the way he spoke and looked while doing so. He just knew he was feeling better with each peck, nibble and lick on his body- so weak against his lovers passionate display that neither growing restless or slightly harder was much of a struggle.

As he said the last few words, like the imes before Wanyin made eye contact with the other - taking in each little reaction, even though more often than not they really just ended up longingly staring at one another. A small addition was, however, that before and after speaking the younger one of them had already been tending to one of the Jades hardening nubs after giving the collarbone area some attention as well..

And, frankly speaking, watching the grumpy tsundere tease that spot of his that gave in and tossed and turned so easily depending on how the Jiang Sect Leader used his tongue.. or how it momentarily disappeared between said ones lips.. It wasn’t his “cup of tea”, definitely not as much of a weak spot for him, but.. for the view alone, he could likely get used to it.

,,Mmh.. doesn’t seem to work, then.. how about here..”

Xichen wasn’t quite sure what his lover planned but as he spoke up Wanyin did sound.. quite focused, seriously trying to figure him out - which really, again, the Jade could get quite used to. Already while saying what he did the younger one adjusted his position so that he could tease his way around the Lan Sect Leaders stomach, starting at the most upper line of it.

From there on, every so often, Wanyin would glance up, asking in several different ways for a “yes” or “no”.. However, the Jade mostly replied with soft little hums, secretly licking over his lips here and there through which soft yet heavier getting breaths began to escape. It was unclear if any of the spots was really his weak one, yet.. one thing was for sure, having that side of the Jiang Sect Leader, watching it unfold and him lower his head further and further to dangerous and aching terrain.. It was enough to make the Jade impatient, hard, ready and embarrassingly enough even slightly wet.

For Wanyin in turn, it had equally as much of an effect on his drunk self to watch the older male fall apart. It was a little childish, maybe, but it made him feel reassured to know that he wasn’t the only one doing so in their strange, few days long affair. And really, how could he not feel proud, or good with it being the Lan’s older Jade of all people who’s hips his lips were causing to move ever so faintly underneath him.. him of all people having that side of Xichen, the gentle pawing on the sheets that occurred more and more often the stronger his lovers want grew - want for him, how strange of a reality that was.

,,Huan, are you still listening properly?~”

,,Mh? Pardon?”

,,My, my Huan.. not listening to someone as they talk to you is quite disrespectful.”

Wanyin was trying his best to act all upset and disappointed, going as far as to click his tongue and shake his head. However, the older one that had spread his legs a little further subconsciously as the Jiang Sect Leader went further and further south.. smiled ever so softly, unwilling to just take all the blame alone.

,,And who’s fault is that, A-Cheng? Apart from that, talking while you’re that close to such a private part of someone, isn’t that all your fault as well?”

,,I don’t know what you’re talking about.~”

The younger one said before lightly nibbling on his lovers inner thigh - Honestly, he looked far too good doing so, even more wild and rough than usually.. at least if you’d ask for the opinion of the Lan Sect Leader who’s lips parted at the sensation, his breathing hitched and a little shaky as well.

Taking note of that, Wanyin moved his head to the other thigh - repeating the process, their eyes fixed on one another’s throughout.


	223. XiCheng | 110

,,That’s torture, my dear.”

Xichen whined - Wanyin chuckled, quite darkly as well. It really had something to get the Jade impatient and on edge.

,,I’m widely known for that. You were aware of whom you got yourself involved with, so no crying around about it now - Huan.~”

,,I’ve never believed those rumours.”

Despite his tone being off due to arousal and teasing, it was audible that the Lan Sect Leader meant what he said.. and the tsundere, or a part of him at least, didn’t.. overly favour that.

,,Is that so?”

Wanyin said as he sat up and reached out to tease his lovers length with a few loose strokes, his tone dark just like his aura. For a few seconds, understandably, the distraction worked.. the wild god’s hips moved into the touch, relief visible in his eyes and expression. However, as sudden as the strokes began, as soon did they stop and the younger one of them provocatively raised a brow.

,,I.. might’ve believed that such things occured, for a while.. to a certain degree.. but after everything, I feel as if there is much more disproving your alleged actions..”

,,Those facts would be?”

The Lan Sect Leader sucked in an audible breath as the others hand once again began to jerk the aching and swollen length of his. Somehow, for one reason or another, it seemed to Xichen like Wanyin didn’t favour that topic.. However, even if it was a struggle, the Jade still explained and would continue to do so no matter how the lust and ache would get to him.

,,There were far too many that tried to walk this path.. and far too few statements made about anyone going missing, witnesses.. There were no cries for help from families about missing relatives or close ones.. Apart from that you were always busy, rebuilding your sect, raising your nephew, recruiting, teaching..”

,,And?”

Regardless of his tone sounding unimpressed, the way the smaller male tightened and sped up his stroking motions with each new sentence the other said.. something was off, which didn’t make Xichen feel much less good around his lower half as he swallowed down the urge to let a few pleasured noises escape.

,,While I went into hiding.. you moved forward with a armour made of aggression.. You wanted to be acknowledged, taken serious… Simultaneously you wanted to keep the number of demonic cultivator down, secretly hoping to.. A-Cheng..”

Xichen breathed out the others name as the tsundere leaned down and wrapped his lips tightly around his length. It was enough to make the Jades mind go blank momentarily, even one of his hands moved and finger got tangled into the younger males untamed hair.

,,The main reason why.. I struggle to believe in the truth of those rumours… is because all the chances you had to take revenge on the one and only demonic cultivator everyone would understand you to.. Nothing happened, that doesn’t make sense.”

Around a minute had passed before the Lan Sect Leader managed to get a grip, even going as far as to sit up and remove his lovers head from the workout it was doing.. And, surely enough, Wanyin brushed his hand off before wiping his mouth.

,,,I might just be waiting until this guy is all happy, has everything he wants and then I will destroy it.”

,,Alright.. Don’t be mad…”

Xichen soothed as he wrapped his arms around the younger leaders middle, pressing a few kisses on his hair - He understood that it was a lie, and the reason why Wanyin couldn’t face him was that he also knew that it had sounded like one. It could only get worse and more obvious if he’d look at the one that hadn’t done anything wrong..

,,I’m not.”

,,You are, at yourself.. I apologise if I may have gone too far..”

,,Can we just forget about all of that now? I don’t think that’s anything we should have in mind or want to have in mind right now.”

,,Alright.. Then, what do you desire to do, my dear?”

,,Aren’t you embarrassed calling a grown man like that?”

“Cute” was in one way or another the thought that crossed the Lan Sect Leaders mind as the younger one shot a glare at him.. with his face all red. If he’d always, or more often, get to see that expression then he’d definitely go on to use even more such nicknames. Due to the momentary lack of braincells on Xichen’s end, his reply came a little belated for that not at all in an ashamed but instead innocent tone.

,,I’m not.. I’m also not embarrassed about saying that I have nothing against you continuing what you did before - unless I understood you correctly and you wish to be-”

,,No need to say that out loud. It’s not a wish, it’s reducing the potential risk of either of us getting hurt, that’s all.”

,,I see.”

There they were again: the sad puppy eyes. Wanyin had always been weak against them, no matter if they were the eyes of a dog, his nephews or now.. the Lan Sect Leaders - if said one would take note of that he could easily manipulate the tsundere, how little Wanyin wanted that. Too late though, Xichen was long since aware of the fact, even if he rarely used “them” on purpose.

,,Then.. there are a few ways we can proceed in."

,,Do we speak the same language still? Because to me it doesn't feel that way."

Letting out a soft chuckle, Xichen moved a little further away on the bed. The action in itself alone made the other feel like it was suspicious, whatever it was that his lover was plotting.

,,We do.. now, would you like to proceed separately or.. would you be alright with turning so your.."

,,I'm not going to shove my ass in your face in that position."

There was no way that one could be more clearly against something.. and there was a part of Xichen that felt somewhat sad about it, as well as one that was shocked about that being the case.

,,Just lay down and shut up, you're ridiculousness knows no limits."

Xichen did as told,even though while pouting to himself.. Maybe one day, he thought, but right now he didn't wish to make his lover throw him out or any more upset.

,,You put me in an equally as embarrassing position already.."

,,Stop whining or I'll bite that part of you off."

Well.. Wanyin was just about to reach out and go back to “work” as it finally made click and his head shot back up, even his expression a matching “?!”.

,,Wait.. Just how many of those books did you read and remember the contents of?”


	224. XiCheng | 111

,,I… You..”

,,I’m listening.”

,,... You have to remember that I’m not the youngest..”

Well, it was late - both Xichen’s reply and the realization - but.. it weirded the younger one out quite a bit to think about or imagine that one of all people reading such books. And yes, there was a voice in Wanyin’s head telling him “think about what you’ve been doing” but those were still different matters - entirely different worlds, to be fair.

In all honesty, the awkwardness displayed from the Jade also made clear that he was just as aware of that. After staring at Xichen for a few more seconds as if he was some rare, otherworldly species or even possessed Wanyin then nodded to himself.

,,Such a dirty one.. You’re still completely ready as well, not bothered at all by the break.”

,,Well..”

It had something to once not be the embarrassed and red faced one, Wanyin thought to himself as he wrapped his hand back around the taller males length - giving it a few gentle yet tight strokes as the other clearly debated about whether or not he should finish what he had started to say.

,,Mh?”

,,You said I shall refrain from saying anything shameless.”

Fair, but annoying. Really, really annoying. Now he had the choice to go back on his words to hear something he wanted yet didn’t want to hear - or leave it and have the ache linger to get to know. At the end, the Jiang Sect Leader rolled his eyes another time before lowering his head back over his lovers length.

,,Let me hold your hair for you..”

,,Mmh..”

Was it a growl, was it a “thank you” or maybe nothing but a simple hum of agreement? The Lan Sect Leader wasn’t sure, but the mild vibration down his length felt good as he reached out to collect most of the younger ones hair in his hand. What made it all better was really the clear sight on the scene, with the occasional glances that met his gaze.

He couldn’t deny that Wanyin’s techniques were constantly getting better - and it wasn’t much different this time, even though.. he somewhat sensed a different, more intense kind of eagerness in the motions of his lovers hand and mouth. It didn’t take long before the Jade was completely infatuated again, just by the simple fact that he had the other in such a way and the soft yet sinful noises that soon began to escape from him hopefully also made that audible to the younger one.

For once the Jiang Sect Leaders intention wasn’t really to get back at Xichen, to get him all embarrassed or flustered or simply even. In truth, Wanyin felt as if he had to give something back.. not that he wanted to show the older one he wanted him and not only the other way around.. absolutely not.. He wasn’t that type of a guy…

Whoever he was trying to make a fool of at this point - himself, only himself actually - the younger ones body was a lot more honest. The more the wild gods length pulsated and twitched under his care, the more desperate and haunted like his pleasured noises grew.. the more restless he got.. Not only restless, his mind turned to dirty imaginations, his own length hardened and not only that part of his throbbed painfully for attention.

As clouded as his mind was, there was a part of Wanyin somewhere in the back of his head that still questioned why on earth he kept doing all those cut-sleeve things.. why he ached more and more for it like some strange sort of addiction. Was the reason the older ones gentle touches? The realization that he couldn’t only cause discomfort in others? Or simply the deep rooted knowledge he had by then about the other giving him praise, so much honest praise..

,,A-Cheng.. if you don’t want.. that in your mouth again.. you should slowly move away…”

The words sank in before the voice in his head could finish whatever it had to say.. and Xichen’s tone, in contrary to him speaking a warning sounded so desperate for anything but him to stop. Not that the younger one would, he wasn’t that weak.. for that ten times as weak towards hearing more of that voice that screamed he made his lover feel good. He had likely hit his head really one too many times.

Other than what the Jade told him to do, the one born in Yunmeng tightened the grip around his length with both lips and hand in addition to quickening up the pace of his motions. Moments, maybe minutes later - he couldn’t quite tell it apart - Wanyin felt the other tense, shudder and his mouth fill with a rather large amount of the taller males lust that hit the back of his throat.

From there the only one that really knew what was going on was Xichen as he moaned throughout his release that he wasn’t aware he had needed this badly. His sight was blurry, breathing heavy and with each new wave of cum that spilled out of him a shudder went through him.. yet the one who seemed to have lost it was Wanyin. He sucked even the last drop out of him and whatever he didn’t manage to swallow due to inexperience he cleaned up as soon as his initial task was completed.. as if something had possessed him.

After a while the older one then let go of his lovers hair before he reached out to lift said ones face up - gently, with two fingers below the Jiang Sect Leaders chin. He then went on to sooth in his - to Wanyin - dangerously seductive after climax tone while stroking over the smaller males cheek with his thumb.. gently, with really no strength getting used.

,,A-Cheng, dear..? Let me take care of you now.."

,,Sorry."

Wanyin's cheeks got slightly pink as he said that in a tone that just like the look in his eyes and his over all expression gave away he was just snapping out of something - in the process of coming back to reality. It was adorable, so much so that Xichen couldn't help but smile sweetly as he leaned in to press a soft yet for a few seconds lasting kiss on his lovers lips. One that conveyed a few emotions, appreciation and thankfulness were only two of them.

,,There's no need for an apology as you have once again made me feel such wonderful things..~"

,,.. whatever.."

It was a little surprising that the younger one only lowly mumbled this word - at least enough to make the Jades eyes go wide momentarily before his expression relaxed and eventually he just.. looked so fond of the other.


	225. XiCheng | 112

,,Now, how shall we continue?”

Xichen asked softly after pressing another little kiss on the others forehead this time before letting go and just sitting there. After a few seconds of silence, a break they both.. not necessarily needed but welcomed, the Jiang Sect Leader got up from the bed to retrieve the bottle of makeshift lube - It was a little amusing to see Wanyin have such a thing for that purpose and that purpose alone in his guest wardrobe, but Xichen made sure not to blow his calm cover..

That was at least until the younger one let the bottle drop onto the sheets before..

,,I didn't expect that.."

,,I'd do a lot more embarrassing things if you'd just stop making such big deals out of it and if, for fucks sake, you'd just not talk.."

Wanyin hissed as he tried to accustom to the fact that he had.. a human chair underneath him that sadly commented on far too many occasions.

,,Alright.. but wouldn't it be-"

,,I'll shove the oil down your throat in a second - with the bottle containing it."

,,I'll be silent.."

Xichen gave in, softly and sweetly yet hurriedly. That being the Jades last words, they let their bodies do all the communicating.. and it didn’t take all that long from there on before it felt a little awkward on the Jiang Sect Leaders end.

Having the older one silently brush his robes further to the side until it dropped and was only held up by his elbows due to him having his arms around the others neck.. hearing the massage oil bottle being opened, feeling more movement and then eventually getting silently signalled that he shall further lift his hips.. It was just.. even more embarrassing? How was that even possible?!

Wanyin had really believed it was a great plan. Get the older one to stop saying shameless things, sit down on his lap and give him something back while still remaining in control.. Right now, as Xichen’s digits wettened his private region though.. he wasn’t even sure for how much longer he’d be in control of his own voice.

,,Your muscles gave in so easily.. they’re getting softer and softer..”

Xichen only spoke up once the first of his fingers had easily invaded his lovers tightness that sucked him in already at the first try. He only paused because of the slight tension going out from Wanyin, yet due to said ones silence it wasn’t hard to tell that he was trying to keep it together more than hurting.

,,Are you alright?”

,,You’re talking again..”

Due to the way the younger one breathed out those words Xichen knew that he had to be fine - Jiang Cheng was Jiang Cheng still, even if physically and audibly drunk and tamed. The Lan Sect Leader only spoke up again after letting out a soft chuckle; successful in making the other feel all safe.. was he really though?

,,How could I not, with how good you feel?~”

,,Just-.. Fuck-”

The plot twist was that the Jiang Sect Leader was anything but safe.. in truth, pretty much as soon as he tried to talk back, Xichen’s digit began to move and all he could do was curse, moan, tense and see the clouds gather.

,,You’re feeling good, aren’t you? Just accept it and let go, A-Cheng..”

,,You’re.. not giving me.. the right to choose..”

,,You may have forgotten, but forcing what you think is best for someone onto them is an issue known to occur in my family..”

Xichen said in a soothing yet somewhat dark tone in between of thrusting into his lovers tight cage with his finger before eventually adding another one - and for once, he also didn’t quite give the younger leader much of a break. Who was, quite frankly, falling apart on top of him already now. A set of Wanyin’s fingers had somehow gotten entangled into the Jades endlessly long hair, his body was tense - in a good way - and his hips lifting further and further, giving him even more space to move.

If the younger one wouldn’t have been far too preoccupied and if he’d instead still be able to take in the way his voice sounded.. honestly, he’d likely not recognise himself. And it continued like that for a while, it felt good.. both the motions in itself but also how his head cleared. At some point, however, when the Lan Sect Leader was about to thrust another one of his digits inside of him, Wanyin snapped himself out of it enough to.. Well, the bitemark he left on the taller males neck would for sure remind him of that night for a few days - if not longer.

,,I’m sorry-”

,,I didn’t bite you because I’m mad for fucks sake… I’m not mad about that, at least. You’re not them and now shut it.”

For not being mad to the Jade the other did sound quite pissed off.. Did he get the chance to say anything further though? No, this time Wanyin had enough of him to the point where the next thing Xichen knew was that somehow their lips collided and his fingers automatically buried themselves deeper into his lovers flesh.

As little as either of them knew who was doing whom by then - as heated did it make them. How would the night turn out if they already were as loud and messy now? Time would probably tell.. and time flew by rather fast as after a while - that felt too short to the Jade - the Jiang Sect Leader that really wasn’t all that quiet drunk broke the kiss. It was more instinctively that after a few more thrusting motions of his digits Xichen paused before eventually pulling them out.

,,What now, my dear?”

,,I should let you lay here and leave.”

Even if he at first still got the reaction he wanted: big brown and sad puppy eyes, the sentence slightly backfired as Xichen buried his face in the crook of his neck while wrapping those abnormally strong arms of his around him - a clear “Not letting go”, more clear than necessary, if you’d ask the tsundere.. that then spoke up in a from moans strained yet not any less irritated tone.

,,I was just kidding for.. lay down and don’t look. Do. Not. Look - Got it?”

When not even a pout seemed to work Xichen did as told, even being such a good boy that he put his arms over his head.. okay, maybe he was also being a bit dramatic - the younger one hadn’t guessed that the Jade could be so childish, but well.. he still didn’t have much experience with the amount of chaos a unleashed, drunk Xichen could bring


	226. XiCheng | 113

,,That’s not as freaking easy as it’s described..”

,,Let me help you-”

,,It’s just ‘cause of your size - where’d that even come from?”

There was it again: The struggle of the inexperienced ones. They really weren’t at a stage yet where much worked with assistance and as much as it got to the moody one.. even Wanyin struggled with the task of sitting down on the others extra large problem - at least without help, that he had absolutely not wanted because at the end that meant.. Xichen had to look at him as he and it was all just..

Luckily a bit of a pleasurable blur at the end as one felt how he got “pierced through” by the other and the Jade in turn how his length got wrapped up and sucked into the younger ones depths.

,,Fuck..”

,,I agree…”

Despite at first only shaking his head in a speechless like manner the clear indication of the Lan Sect Leader trying his hardest to keep it together.. It was like neither of them really but once a few seconds had passed they both burst into a short but heartfelt fit of laughter.

,,What do you agree for? You’re in the good position here, Huan.”

,,I apologize for using your term but.. it’s a “fucking” good position..~”

While the younger one couldn’t believe his ears, the blushing Jade ran his hands that had until then rested on the others thighs over his face. The situation was between adorable and strange - more of the first though.. not that Wanyin would admit that, instead he switched to attacking.

,,Fucking good? You’re even more shameless while I’m embarrassing the crap out of myself. You got some guts - prim and proper Jade, my ass.”

Well, the more Wanyin got into his - actually mostly - acted tantrum, including a few slaps and light punches against his lovers chest and sides.. the redder in the face the Lan Sect Leader got, but not only that somehow.. he ticked something awake in Xichen - a beast that should’ve remained on the leash.

,,I truly like it.. and it’s all mine right now.”

,,What..? And you’re laughing while saying that?”

,,I could do a lot of things while laughing if I have to admit..”

,,Just.. I’m done.”

For a few seconds it seemed so likely that the tsundere was about to run that.. Xichen reacted a tad too fast as well as a little too wholeheartedly - Meaning, he somehow got a hold of his lovers wrist and pulled him down, not even having enough mercy in his bones to let the Jiang Sect Leader adjust.. Not that night, as right then and there the Jades hips moved gently and slowly just a few times.

,,Forgive me, I just couldn’t help it.. now, do you really want to stop..?”

,,I would’ve done a lot worse then already.. quite a while ago as well.. but what’s this position?”

They both spoke in between of heavy breaths that gradually calmed down, yet remained soft and shaky due to the movements of the taller males hips. And the position the tsundere was referring to? Well, his head was right beside the Jades, fingers entangled with the others still and he still on top.. just bend over and without any type of control.

,,I thought you’d try to leave..”

,,After all the work? And what I gave you? I’m not that nice..”

No matter how much the younger one argued, Xichen wasn’t buying it all that much. Either way, after saying what he did Wanyin fixed his position - a little at least - which meant getting his hands back under his control, propping his upper body onto them and.. staring into the taller males dark eyes before leaning in and playfully biting into Xichen’s lower lip.

,,While you may claim not to be so nice.. the view I have and the sensations I’m feeling definitely are, my dear..”

The Lan Sect Leader breathed out, his tone far too sweet for the dirty words. His thrusts were growing more daring, causing the tsundere that already struggled somewhat with keeping it together to curse. To worsen the younger ones state, the Jade then let his fingertips trail over his back, with just enough pressure that his nails were lightly scratching over the sensitive and scarred skin.

It was just enough, especially around his lower back and ass, to make the already blushing Wanyin drop his head, hair falling into his face as he tightened the hold onto the sheets below his hands. The Jade repeated the process a few times, the motions remaining soft and gentle just like the way he buried himself into his lover tight cage before he eventually spoke up in a gentle, mildly concerned but more so caring tone - only after making the Jiang Sect Leader curse a few times, a little something that, given the circumstances, made him feel it just as much as the other did.

,,You should put a little less strain on your body.. you can never know what risks there might be..”

,,You can say that so easily.. because you have it all, Huan… Now shut it and move your hips.”

As wild and overtaken by pleasure Wanyin looked, that he still managed to glare and raise a brow caused the older male to let out a soft, amused noise. He was quickly silenced, however, by the tsundere slamming his lips on his own and really.. they’d be able to converse about such matters at another time.. maybe, probably.. because right now it was good enough for Xichen that his lover was letting go and so did he as he felt himself relax while his hands got a hold of the younger males backside.


	227. XiCheng | 114

,,Are you enjoying yourself?”

,,I am, how about you, my dear?”

Even if the Jiang Sect Leader was nowhere near as physically strong as him.. Xichen couldn’t deny that the hold the other had on his arm right then and there didn’t mildly pain him. At the same time he didn’t know how he could reply so innocently this time himself.. because they had been at it for likely over an hour at this point and whenever Wanyin seemed close.. he just stopped any and all kinds of movements - resulting in a quite frustrated tsundere that looked as if he was ready to rip him to shreds.

The Jades movements had come to an abrupt hold for maybe the third time at this point - Giving them both a break, that for sure the younger one of them did not want, to catch their breath.

,,You find yourself funny, don’t ya?”

,,Actually I’m intending to continue for several more hours.”

,,You can play your game that easily because you’ve got it done not long ago, asshole. I should let you spend your “hours” alone in your room.”

,,Would you be able to find the relief you’re aching for this way, all by yourself?”

There he was, raising a brow at the Lan Sect Leader a few nights back because he wasn’t “able” to get himself off.. And now he himself couldn’t say another word because as humiliating as it was to get done by a guy the imagination of doing whatever to his own backside was just.. A few seconds of silence passed before Wanyin rolled off of the others lap, pouting and raging like a child that was used to get spoiled but now didn’t get what it wanted - which he was, just an adult acting like one.

,,Enjoy your break.”

Letting out a soft breath, Xichen stared at the ceiling before he got up and covered himself with his undergarment.

,,Would you like me to get you something?-”

,,How about that servant maiden of yours?”

Well, that had slipped out between his lips a tad too fast and resulted in the younger one himself closing his eyes and gritting his teeth - He wasn’t the nicest of guys, already sober and unprovoked.. but that really hadn’t been necessarry.

,,Some liquor wouldn’t be bad..”

,,Alright.”

The older one simply responded before turning and walking off - not without having sighed another time as well as taking note of how the other rubbed with his hand over his face. He didn’t hold the initial response against Wanyin all that much.. because he knew how said one was, he had been provoking him for quite a while and apart from that.. Jealousy wasn’t really an issue you’d have if you’re not somewhat emotionally invested at least.. or?

At this point in time Xichen didn’t know enough about the secret sides the Jiang Sect Leader possessed to know how little he liked sharing anything that was his - even if just remotely - he only knew little about how much Wanyin was willing to risk, lose and invest in order to regain it.

* * *

,,There.”

,,Thanks.”

The few minutes Wanyin spend alone before the Jade returned with a cup of tea and a jar of liquor were enough for him to cool of somewhat.. Which meant that he felt more how much of an idiot he was now, but one can’t have everything after all. Sitting up the younger one took his jar and a sip of it.. before sooner or later breaking the silence that the Lan Sect Leader didn’t quite know how to break.

,,Sorry, I guess.. I got annoyed and acted that way again.”

,,Change comes with time, A-Cheng.. also, I must admit that I was aware of it being a possibility that you would be somewhat moody with how I go about things.”

,,And you still do it? You must really be into pain.”

As softly as Xichen spoke, as amused was the chuckle his lover let out and he himself also couldn’t refrain from letting out a huff of laughter - it wasn’t hard to come to that conclusion, that much he had to admit.

,,Sometimes you have to hurt in order to grow - or get someone else to grow.. Other times, you have to indulge in momentary pain for a beautiful flower to grow.”

,,That might be true - which still doesn’t mean that it’s easy.”

,,It certainly might not be - but we shouldn’t avoid it either way.. and after the pain and frustration I caused you, I will make sure to make it up to you, A-Cheng.”

The innocent drinking and communicating didn’t last all that long as somewhere in between the Jade had already gotten up to put his cup aside.. before sitting back down beside his lover, gently taking the jar out of said ones hand before placing that down on the ground. Even though their lips didn’t meet just yet again and as little as Wanyin wanted to admit.. his body was aching for the taller males touch and it only grew worse the closer Xichen got.

Once again their gazes were flickering about, as their voices naturally went lower while the Lan Sect Leaders hand trailed with a feather light touch down the younger ones chest all the way to his thigh.. then back up, just enough so he could loosely wrap his hand around the throbbing and leaking length of his “beloved”.

,,Is that so?”

Wanyin whispered in a rough tone, breathing a little shaky as well as a tad heavy as their heads tilted to the side and minds grew clouded - far more beautifully clouded than any of the Lan Sects robes or ribbons.

,,It is.”

,,You’re not alone.”

,,I know.”

The older one softly replied with a bit of a smirk playing on the corners of his lips - he quite enjoyed the softness and honesty the Jiang Sect Leader was able to portray with the right mixture of alcohol, frustration and sexual stimulation involved..

And right then and there he had it all. Once the last few words were exchanged, Xichens lips brushed against his before the met another time. In between of all of that, with gentle and firm motions his length got tended to while one of his own got a hold of the Lan Sect Leaders nape - a little roughly, somewhat clumsily and definitely not without some strands of hair getting pulled on.. but it was something, a little gesture that.. as far as Wanyin could tell also got to the Jade with how everything seemed to intensify from there on.


	228. XiCheng | 115

,,How much longer do you plan to keep this child's play going?"

,,Weren't you so eager and focused on finding relief?~"

,,Get up on my lap and I’ll remind you of how little you can find it once you’ve been riled up like that, Huan.”

They were both more than aware that the Jiang Sect Leader was merely putting on a brave face. Nothing had changed about their position, or all the kissing… for that though, Xichen could feel the mess in his hand. A throbbing, madly leaking one at that.

And no matter what the Jade was known for, or which nicknames and titles he had - he was still a man deep down and there were only so many invitations and so much teasing before he would make a move.

That time had come when he watched his lover grit his teeth, muscles tensing and it was clear Wanyin was getting closer and almost there but holding it back.. And somehow, there was just something getting tickled awake inside Xichen that wanted to crack the facade, because.. well, in more than one way he had seen enough people break and decend into madness doing exactly that: playing a role.

,,If you tell me what you want, then we both know you will get it.”

,,Quite unfair, given that my mind is screwed right now.”

,,Actions are the same as words, my dear.”

No matter how hard the Lan Sect Leader tried, for quite a while longer Wanyin didn’t cave in.. It actually wasn’t until he took the lead just enough to end up between his lovers legs, the strokes with his hands faster and tighter and mouth tending to the tsunderes hardened nubs.. that he felt the younger ones legs wrap around his hips, pulling him closer.

..Don’t waste the last few hours like that.”

,,Alright.~”

As much as Wanyin growled, glared and liked to pretend.. Well, in his mind he’d fool himself anyway into believing that it was just because he could cum like that on his own as well so.. Either way, there was a certain sense of relief coming over him as Xichen’s hand disappeared before said one sat up to get some more lube on the both of them because.. No matter how short-lived it was, it had a strange impact on the tsundere to see the taller male lube himself up.. and that despite how embarrassing his position was.

,,Now, shall we continue?~”

,,If you dare to.”

Wanyin could feel he was craving the other inside his body as the Jade leaned back over him, not really smirking but somehow he was and the younger one couldn’t help but provoke some further. Not that it overly affected Xichen, who licked over his lower lip before pushing his length back inside his lovers tight cage - all the way, without a warning.. causing the so composed Jiang Sect Leaders back to arch and him to curse. The curse, however, sounded as pleasured and relieved as the wild god himself felt.

And just like promised, neither of them got a single bit of sleep that night.. Once the younger one had found relief, the other had gone back to the teasing with the abrupt pause of his thrusting motions and despite Wanyin glaring and all.. No matter how frustrating it felt at times, or how badly they ended up being covered in sweat and drained of all their strength while having a boost of some sort at the same time..

It felt good, each new release more and by the time the night turned into day they were exhausted but more than anything relaxed. More relaxed than they’d ever been..

Some time as the sun rose and they both had used up most of their stamina and strength.. Well, daytime had come and if they wanted to or not they had to seperate with the Jade heading back to his room. Just on time, since they had to get ready before the maidens assigned for them would tell them the schedule for the day.


	229. Chapter 229

While Xichen and Wanyin spend their night awake.. the Juniors had gone to bed early.. mostly because they were more than aware of how weak Sizhui was towards a lot of things. And while one group was sleeping peacefully and the other enjoying the finer things in life..

The married couple was somewhat torn, with the younger one having only arrived back to their room not long before Lan Zhan would usually wake up. Like always, however, once he laid down the younger Jade hugged him and whatever fights there were between them at this point Wei Wuxian felt like they had to make it work somehow.. but that was a topic for another time, given that there were only a few hours left for everyone to enjoy themselves.

And Wen Ning? Well, he was trapped in the same position again with Nie Huaisang slumped over him.. quite similarly to a cat, just a little taller.

It was strange that even though it was such a short trip no one had been overly motivated to attend at first.. Everything, or mostly everything, had turned out well - including the snow sculptures that would eventually melt and disappear, other than the memories and relations they made.

It was a journey no one wanted to go on, yet ultimately no one regretted being there.. and so, the last hours flew by with them packing, eating and having a laugh without anyone really heading back to their rooms. Nie Huaisang gave a last speech and the first departed, yet it didn’t sink in that everything was over until Wanyin rose from his seat, calling for his nephew to grab his stuff as well because they’d be the first of their odd group to leave..

There weren’t dramatic tears being shed, like always the Jiang Sect Leader and Wei Wuxian didn’t even say “Farewell” or anything similar to that at all. The Juniors said their words of goodbye, the Lan’s encouraging their friend for all the changes that were about to come in his still young life. Wen Ning bowed, so did Xichen.. and then there was it, the farewell that left the Juniors trying hard to stay composed.

,,Sect Leader Jiang.”

,,Zewu-Jun. I am looking forward to possibly working with you in the future.”

,,I will make sure to notify you as soon as there are developments in the discussions with our sects elder.”

,,I will prepare what I have to while waiting for that then.”

,,Sect Leader Jiang, young master Rulan - please arrive home safely and in case either of you needs advice I am more than willing to aid and assist.”

,,T-Thank you.”

Jin Ling stuttered out, once again taken aback by the Jades way of being while his uncle simply bowed again.

And so they turned and departed while only the Lan Sects group remained for a while longer before they also made themselves on the way back.. once Nie Huaisang had made sure to take Wen Ning to the side and remind him of the promise that had been made about contacting him once the house was set and done so a cat could be placed in the Ghost Generals care.

* * *

,,You know.. even though you didn’t want to attend the gathering.. Thank you.. for coming along..”

Jin Ling only spoke up once the Nie Sect could be barely be seen anymore and initially his uncle didn’t reply, but when he did once the younger one added something between a question and a statement.. his tone was weirdly honest, a little gone out but not in a bad way.

,,The trip wasn’t all that bad, wasn’t it?”

,,It wasn’t.. But now let’s head back quickly, don’t think you can continue to slack off - you have a lot of thinking to do.”

,,Don’t remind me just yet.. Jiujiu?”

,,What, brat?”

,,Thank you.. and I’m sorry for not speaking to you sooner.”

The future Jin Sect Leader hadn’t been prepared for his hair getting ruffled and the few - frankly too hard - pats on the back.. but both happened and it left him red faced as well as ready to jump on his fathers sword and before Wanyin knew it his nephew had taken off. If anything he could deny, their blood relation wasn’t one of those things.

* * *

A while after they had made themselves on the way back to Gusu they had formed two groups.. Wei Wuxian, Wen Ning and the youths were up front, just about a few feet ahead and the twin Jades walking more slowly. It was a nice day, one of the first hints of a nearing spring maybe..

,,Have you talked to young master Wei yet, A-Zhan?”

Private talk between brothers, the type they secretly had when they were younger with no one hearing it.. because there it wasn’t appropriate to even talk to family members too “casually”. As Xichen glanced over, however, all the younger one did was shake his head.. and so, after letting out a soft yet heavy breath he spoke up again - his tone between that of an older brother and sect leader.

,,Even if I may have had my struggles with young master Wei.. and even if it isn’t my place to say.. I have made another one of my many mistakes with always being the one to act or talk for you..-”

,,Brother-”

,,Please, A-Zhan, listen.”

Xichen interrupted after being interrupted himself and even if he was able to read the confusion and reluctance in the way his younger brother looked.. things had to change, so many at that.

,,The way you were relying on me, I was the one putting you in that position.. because instead of guiding you, I always acted for you - in your stead. And for a long time I didn’t think about why, nor did it appear to me to be wrong.. Now, however, I have come to the realisation that I didn’t want to lecture you, given that all we do is lecture and getting lectured..”

The older Jade then paused for a moment, weighing Liebing in his hands as carefully as the words he wanted to say in his head.

,,A-Zhan, that will change now. If you need advice, I will give it to you.. but you need to communicate on your own - if you wish for your relations to prosper and last. We have a bond, yet not everyone will be able to read you the way I can.. and I need you to understand that, as I will not continue to act as if your life is mine to live, your words are mine to speak and your actions are mine to make..”

,,A-Xian and I.. I think we might fall apart if we do not change..”

,,You are both afraid of communicating..”

Xichen replied with a fond, tiny smile tugging on the corners of his lips and for a few minutes after silence spread between them before - surprisingly - Wangji spoke up again.

,,Brother?”

,,Yes?”

,,I was unsure if you were in the condition to leave the seclusion yet, but it seemed to have been the right choice.”

,,Why do you think that?”

,,For the first time, your skin has a healthy color, your smile is genuine and your eyes.. are full of life.”

,,The last few years have drained me, yet.. I want to make up for the mistakes I’ve made. I think I am ready to take my position on again and bring a change that has been long since needed..”

,,We both have the same destination, on different paths.”

,,Yes.”

And it wasn’t only them two.. in truth, each person that had been present at the Nie Sect began a journey much bigger once the event was over. Some destinations were clear and out in the open, others hidden and secret.. but all were real, and hopefully all of them would be accomplished - no matter how rocky the path would be.


	230. Chapter 230

Hello everyone, I just wanted to give a bit of an explanation for the sudden ending of the story.

First of all, everyone should be aware of the situation we all live in right now - However, other than most - or many - me and my family are still living a completely normal life. We are in charge of cleaning buildings etc and I - for example - work for a company that is in charge of worldwide power supply. My stepdad works where there are patients with the virus and my mom is still working as well. There are just many changes to daily routines and it’s just a pain, but we’re still fine despite being high risk patients ourselves.

Another reason is because I felt as if the story would drag out far too long if I would continue writing all the things I still had in mind. This was originally just supposed to be a short starter thing for a 3 part XiCheng Universe and it’s been going on for 4 months now. I have no self-control xD

The third reason would be what I had addressed a few days back already. I am questioning my position in the fandom and if I still want to be a part of it. It is getting worse and it’s just exhausting as well to feel like you can’t be free in a fandom because of all the blacklisting, hatred, bias and so forth.

4\. I am not a overly huge WangXian fan and while I do like working with them in fix-it settings like how it was in this story.. there is just too much content centering around them and them alone while there is so much MDZS has to offer.

And now the final reason. I feel like the feedback I get for the work I’ve put in so far just doesn’t add up and it would only get worse the longer I’d keep the story going. The comments, hits and bookmarks might seem like a lot but in comparison to me spending endless hours on writing, proofreading, uploading and so forth it’s just.. frustrating.  
Now, I don’t want to sound arrogant or anything like that, but any type of comment would’ve been appreciated. Even of those that dropped the story, or a critique. And yes, the comments look like a lot but most are of the same reader I am so thankful to have had on this journey and me replying to the few others I had. It isn’t much to ask for a comment of any kind that could take you seconds while an author spend who knows how much time writing the story/update.  
With how little feedback there was, even if 30 people have the story bookmarked there is nothing encouraging about that as you don’t know if they’re actually reading it, that they want to see more etc. I’ve tried several times to interact, show that I’m an author that cares about what the reader want etc but the reaction just didn’t make me feel like it mattered if the story kept going or not.

Now, the end in itself is not different from what I planned to write since the start, everything else was just cut short. I might change it still, or add some things through extras but right now I will end the story like this. And I want to remind every person that stumbles across this story about the fact that we writer don’t need to post the story because we know the story. If you want to read a story, you need to show that here and there or else it might get the author to drop it, cut it short and so forth. While it takes you seconds to write a comment, it takes authors hours to write the content you get for free.

About the future of this Universe: If I decide to continue the story the uploads will differ. It’s a major pain to upload 20+ chapter and it would also be much longer of a timespan within the story. Which is why I would write everything from there on similiarly to OneShots or closed stories.

Thank you to all those of you who took their time to read my story until now and even more of my gratitude goes to those that have commented. A huge shoutout to those that commented on each update, you’re the reason why I decided to finish this story! For all those that don't decide to read the other chapters since the story is technically completed: You'll find links to all the extras and the second part of this universe in chapter 132 & 133! The story is not dropped and I don't plan to drop it


	231. New Extra

I just wanted to give out the update that I posted another extra that plays in the break between the Snow Sculpture Event and the second part of the Universe. There are three now and two are XiCheng related while one is about WangXian.

You need to read this series in order to understand a few things in the upcoming "One More Chance" Part 2

Also, I hope you're still all safe and healthy!

Extra 1: [Jiang Cheng's forgotten loss of control](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22574389)

Extra 2: [My Thoughts - Your Memories](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22486708)

Extra 3: [A gift of Jiang Wanyin](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24048835)


	232. News

Hello! I hope you and your loved ones are safe and sound!

Now, to get to the news.... It took a while, but I've now posted the first chapter for the second part of this universe!

There are 10 chapter, a few surprises, a bit of gore and Jin Ling's "crowning ceremony" already going on. Zizhen has finally made an appearance as well!

[One More Chance (Universe) | Part 2](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24310381) is now up and ready to be read!


	233. Jin Sect Arc

So, I'm not quite sure how many check on AO3 for updates and with the lack of emails until recently I just thought I'd put out a new reminder.

If you go a chapter back you'll find the links to all the extras and the second part of this universe that I've started already.

It's a Jin Sect Arc for a shorter while and there'll be a lot of things happening so stay tuned and if you decide to check it out: thank you and I hope you'll enjoy!


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